Campfire Scarytales: Podcasted for the Auditory Approval of the Match Scratch Society, We Quietly Confirm Your Fireside Initiation Introduction: Between Midnight and First Light

Good Evening, Match Scratchers If you once enjoyed, still enjoy or will enjoy henceforth, and in perpetuity, Nickelodeon's very own Are You Afraid of the Dark? broadcast that terrified both tot and teen alike in the early 90's, then you will feel right at home on the jagged, cold, forsaken rocks, atop the speaker's stone throne while occupying temporary, nocturnal space in this chillingly convenient clearing where fellow match scratchers meet to splash tales of terror upon an open flame. These terrifying testimonies are far from tame, the most unnerving, unsettling and upsetting campfire scarytale wins the game and striking matches, along with striking deeply into your core fear gland, proves their aim. If you're soon too frightened or anxious to sleep, if you intend to scream but can nary muster a peep, if your once spry movements retard to a lumbering creep; in becoming a slave to your fears, you have, but yourself, to blame. Between midnight and first light we meet, our appetites wolfish, our thirst parched, our delirium peaked for delicious tales of fright; in your own unease, crawling skin, tingled spine and sweaty brow we take delight, it will be hours before you can see anything beyond our proximal campfire light, our weekly night light. We have cleared, constructed and consecrated this campsite, in our decorative, secretive, roundtable fireside Match Scratch Society we revel in delight, it is both our sacred and unholy duty to, your fears, incite, this dry, cold cord of wood ignite--your amygdala affright, if, by some miraculous design, you survive our scarytale of the night, then it is your solemn Campfire Scarytale duty to find your Match Scratcher ass back to this haunted hollow, with a new recruit, of your own, in tow, who, your cues, will follow, along with your flashlight, to your own diabolical, original and nerve-jangling tale recite while you deliver potent doses of fear while you sit tight, recount your wickedly warming fire side account with confidence absent any perceptible stage fright and occupy our society's spotlight until the flames fade, the embers and coals lose the gusto of their once resplendent glow and recount your abhorrent account until there's no more fear to stoke, foment or otherwise grow and no other delicious, devilish details for your Match Scratchers to know. Collect your new batch of Match Scratcher sheep, find a cold rock seat to warm, poke, with your makeshift spear, the waning fire, roast those mellows before they exceed their shelf life and expire, master your storytelling and your fears upon this pyre and await with deathless, breathless anticipation your premiere Campfire Scarytale with: Campfire Scarytales: Submission 1: Never Touch Another Match Scratcher's Matchstick! (Crooked Stick Magic Trick/In Over His Head Raising the Dead); (Magician's Assistant/Sorcerer's Apprentice) Your host: That's Falsetto, No Mr. accent on the to and co-host: Dr. Red Devil with a REH REH REH Until next time, Match Scratchers! Remember, only you can prevent forest fires, call out Campfire Scarytale imposters and disloyal match scratcher liars! (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Surrender, courtesy of the artist, Asher Fulero, with a medley of sound effects added for, you guessed it, effect.