Celebrating a Millennial Christmas with a Double Chin.

This week we're unwrapping the gifts millennials actually want (money until we're dead, fake Crocs, Netflix lifetime subscriptions and noise-cancelling headphones to avoid human interaction) versus the ones we don't (robotic cat teddy bears that gave Lady M PTSD, and "Live Laugh Love" signs that should say "Live Love Fuck Off"). Chloe reveals she's never received cash as a gift (tragic), we defend our crew-cut sock choices as a desperate Gen Z cosplay, and Lady M confesses her Toffifee addiction before we spiral into post-Christmas weight gain shame. Plus: why we need obnoxiously rude novelty mugs annually and a brutal top 20 countdown of the worst gifts we've ever received—featuring the iconic roll-up Lynx Africa. Special mentions of Trump, Diddy, and Erica Kirk, but don't worry—Cardi B is here to save us all.