Chapter 8: When the Planner Stops Planning

I am a planner. Give me a passing mention of a vacation, and I'll have a list of hotels and things to do by the next morning. But in the summer and fall of 2022, I stopped. No trips, no plans, nothing to look forward to. I told myself I was just busy. The truth was that the future had gotten too painful to imagine. In this chapter, I share the small, quiet moment that finally showed me how bad things had really gotten. This chapter touches on emotional abuse and a fear of losing someone to suicide. If you or someone you love needs support, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. In the US, you can also call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. If there is immediate danger, call 911.