Coercive Control: Christine Dillard on her 17 Year marriage, How to Leave and Why It's Not So Easy to Walk Away From Abuse

In this episode I'm joined by Christine Dillard, author of The Truth She Showed Me. Christine takes us back to the very first date that should have been a red flag, through 17 years of coercive control, and the three and a half year process it took to plan a safe exit while protecting her children. She's honest about the isolation, the moments that turned physical, and the devastating way her ex chose to reveal a family secret in front of their children the night she filed for divorce.We talk about what coercive control actually looks like from the inside, the strategy behind her parenting plan, and why leaving doesn't mean it's over. It's a difficult, important conversation, and Christine's honesty throughout is remarkable.We cover:The early red flags she now recognises, and why 23-year-old her didn't see themThe night isolation truly began, and how a single family dinner changed everythingWhat coercive control actually looks like day to day, financial control, isolation, walking on eggshellsThe three and a half year process of planning a safe exit, and the parenting plan strategy she used to protect her childrenThe night she told him she was leaving, and the moment he chose to reveal a devastating family secret to their childrenWhy leaving doesn't mean it's over, and how she's still navigating boundaries years laterWhat she's learned from male survivors, and the particular shame men carry around abuseWhy she donates a book to a domestic violence organisation for every 20 sold, doubling that every October for DV Awareness MonthAbout Christine Christine Dillard is the author of The Truth She Showed Me, a memoir of her 17-year marriage and the process of discovering herself again after years of coercive control. Drawing on her own story and conversations with dozens of other survivors, Christine writes and speaks openly about coercive control, healing, and what it really takes to rebuild a life on the other side.Connect with Christine: Book: The Truth She Showed Me, https://amzn.eu/d/01Wnhs4U Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetruthsheshowedme/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/14iCRuWPw52/?mibextid=wwXIfrIf this episode has affected you: Refuge runs the National Domestic Abuse Helpline, free and confidential, 24 hours a day. Call 0808 2000 247 or visit nationaldahelpline.org.uk. Men's Advice Line offers confidential support for male victims of domestic abuse. Call 0808 801 0327.About Fran Fran Willoughby is an evidential medium, Reiki practitioner and intuitive facilitator, and the host of The Power of the Truth. Through Mojo Motivator she offers mediumship readings, oracle card readings, Reiki healing and coaching, helping people find clarity, connection and confidence through life's biggest transitions. Find out more or book a session at www.mojo-motivator.com.Send us Fan MailIf you have a story that you think would be good for the podcast, please do get in touch by emailing [email protected].