Modern Westerns. Yeah, modern Westerns. Let's see. Fargo, by Toyota.
Again, never seen. This, again, it's another genre that I'm just sort of like fucking out. You have seen a few. I probably have seen a few, but I just, I guess drive would probably be a modern Western.
Sure, maybe. I guess they call it a neo-noir, but it's also eco-also-sates of Western. I don't know. Yeah.
How would you define it? No fucking clue how you'd define this thing. Like, I guess, is there a guy with a cowboy hat on a city boy? I don't think that's, in the past, if you go back and look at how we define it in the past, I don't think it, cowboys have been necessary for the modern Western.
No. I think it's often been about that standoff, that tension, the like, the. Between the old ways and the new ways. Yeah, a little bit.
Yeah. Like, is it no country for old men? I think that's in now times. Yeah, yeah.
It's certainly now. And Tommy Lee Jones at the beginning is talking about how he loved it in the old days. Yeah. I think that feels like modern Western territory, right?
Tommy Lee Jones. Tommy Lee Jones. One actor. Another way you can find out with some modern Western is if you just make a modern movie and then put Samil in it.
Samil? Yeah. Sam Elliott. Sam.
Samil. Actually, when you said it, I was like, I know who you mean. Yeah, I didn't mean Sam Elliott. Sam Elliott is the guy.
Sam is the man that made for the mustache. Samil is the New Zealand actor from Jurassic Park. Yes. Yeah.
For all the people. Yes. Which both work? As modern western.
We got a wrangler, some velociraptors. Let's find out what Google says. You've got a cowboy hat on. A modern Western, because I know that we have both seen some of these.
And I've seen no country for old men at once. And that was me forcing myself to sit down and watch it because I'd watched the opening to it about 20 times. The revenue. The revenue.
Oh, that's not a saying. Yeah. I guess when we talking about modern Western, but I'm not Western, say, not Western shot. Yeah.
Yeah. Anything with anti-heroes, themes that you might expect from the old West, like that sort of lawlessness with a single person kind of starts to solve that, try to solve a bigger problem. You could call the Batman again, another neo-noise. Yeah.
It's often like Western, sort of, more into noir once you get it moved into the modern day, I guess. Logan is a modern Western. Logan, yes. That's very modern Western.
I think, like, despite the fact that it's got super powered beings in it, it's like very modern, like modern times. Yeah, it doesn't matter really what the content is. I guess it's one of the definitions, right? Like the Sicario is supposed to be...
Oh, yeah. I haven't watched that, but I've heard that. That's a very good movie. Again, another sort of noir movie.
Yeah. Basically, Emily Blunt is working for Border Patrol and stuff. It's quite tense. I think a looper is a modern-wise style.
Oh, yeah. Like, it's more of a futuristic western work. It's not a fine western work, yeah. Sort of in that kind of space where, like, yeah, there's a lone person outside the cycle, outside of the...
He's warring fat court between massive political forces you can't control. But, like, I think it works well in sci-fi space, because obviously, a lot of times, you know, you can look at minority report. There's a man stuck in a round forces you can't control. He's just trying to get out of it, right?
But that modernity is catching up with him. Yeah, yeah. But that, of course, is just kind of noir. But the western part is like those forces are...
It's like almost too big. But this man's taking a stand. Yeah, yeah. Whereas, noir is like, no stand can ever be made.
No stand, yeah, yeah. It's... Yeah. When you...
We say man, obviously, like, it didn't have to be a man, but most of them are. But when you think about looper and how it ends, basically, he does bring down the forces that be... Yeah. Great cost.
Yeah. And if you look at Blade Runner 2049, there is... Like, Jared Leo's character isn't even touched in the movie. It's...
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's basically forgotten at the end of it, because he's just comfy. There's nothing more to say. Yeah.
Like, no one can touch him. He's got in our movie. Yeah. And yeah, it's...
I guess that's the distinction between Noir and Western. Western, I think... Yes, there can be endings where the system just defeats them. Yeah.
And I'm thinking... Butch Cassidy, Sundance Kid. Yeah. That one, where at the end, they just run out into a jail of gunfire.
Yeah. Yeah. And then, like Bonnie and Clyde as well, that could be considered a... Well, modern Western...
Yeah. Some of Louise, I guess. I guess, yeah, with Westerns, it's like an element of crime to it. Yeah.
And I think with Noir, there is the sort of grey aspect to the characters, where they're sort of going, I think, with Westerns. Westerns, when they were out, when they were popular, were more sort of black and white. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Like, we're the good guys. We're gonna pass it up together and go kill the son of a gun who's rustling the cattle. And then the modern Western, whether or not you treat it as films about Cowboys made now.
Or whether or not you treat it as films that could be told with Cowboys for a different setting. Yes. Like the... Because they have the same socio-political themes.
However you like angle that, it's gotten... It's all gotten more noir. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Because our vision of the American West is way more nuanced than it was back in those days. Yes. I'm thinking of Yellowstone.
And that whole thing, the Kevin Costner series. Yeah. That's very sort of like... I'm not doing the right thing, but it's sort of on the frontier West still, somehow.
Yeah. Yeah. Why? Who knows?
And then you've got the prequels, which are very much Westerns. Yeah. Yeah. It's the Oregon Trail, the first series, and then the second series is more sort of like, our modernity is coming.
Yes. How are we gonna keep our farm running? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. It's... Yeah. With Yellowstone, it is just a case of, like, again, bringing modern sensibilities and sort of troubles to that kind of setting.
Yeah. Yeah. And that... You see that also in...
Nope. Yeah. Yes. Which is a modern-western shore.
You see that in... You're bringing up... No. Yeah.
Because that's one where it actually applies. And then at the end, when you've got him wrangling that UFO, and it's playing a full Western orchestral score. Yeah. Yeah.
You're right. It's about modernity. It's about exploitation of the natural surroundings, and what is there? It's a giant jellyfish in the sky.
LAUGHTER What Western film would be better with a giant jellyfish in the sky? Let us know. Let us know. I love the good of them, the jellyfish.
LAUGHTER Then Eastwood's been followed by a giant jellyfish. It really wants the gold. Yeah. You just see that UFO floating around the graveyard at the end.
LAUGHTER BAPAPAPAPAP At the end, very close between the eyes. No one's making icon-tack with a UFO. It's not eyes. It's not eyes.
Well, it can't make eye contact with it, it'll kill him. LAUGHTER Yum. Yum. Yum.
Yum. I think those... those themes of, like, a... Yeah, you're like, modernity is a big theme in modern sense, right?
Like, how old school sensibilities of, like, the simple things, you know, complicated by, like, bigger forces. Like, frontier justice, like, to some characters, modern westerns, is a thing, and it's like the audience is sort of bought-in, different digitalist, and, like, you empathize with people who are like, I want to kill this motherfucker, who's wrong me in some way. Yeah, because no one else is going to be suggesting this. No one else is going to be suggesting this.
Either that or, like, yeah, the systems in place aren't enough. Yeah. So I'm going to take the Lawrence main hand, which, again, is sort of a noir kind of thing. But I'm thinking of Breaking Bad.
Sure. Like, Breaking Bad is very much a modern western. Sure. Like, he is a teacher who's working full-time and cannot afford...
He has the humility, the male humiliation of not being able to provide for his family, to sort of, like, be seen by rich people around him as a failure, despite feeling like he's followed all the rules. And so he takes the law into his own hands. He's going, right, well, the systems aren't working for me. I'm going to stop making meth.
Yeah. I'm going to use my skills. And then that power goes to his head. Yeah.
It's... And the ends up becoming the man in the black hat. Tilt, Taylor, like... Yeah, true.
Yeah. Yeah. And there's a load of showdowns in that shade. It's very much a western.
Like, I only got to see one. Yeah. Murray froze a big, big, exploding rock. Wait, what?
The closest that show gets to a superhero movie. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, that guy's wheelchair explodes. And, like...
I'm sorry. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Jim Carlos Bizzito has got, like, his half his face burnt off. It's very, very Batman.
Yeah. Like, yeah. I've created a villain. Yeah.
Like, probably we were just sort of like, oh my God, are they going to have Jim Carlos Bizzito be like the big villain now? We've just half a face burnt off. No, no, he dies. He dies a few seconds after that.
But yeah, that kind of thing. I think we've hit the nail on that. It's sort of like, yeah, the sort of... Modern forces and the simple needs of humans that want to fix it in their own very simple way, but can often end up doing more harm than good.
And you can go back to Manorto Port on that. Because like the guy Tom Cruise, John Anderson? What? Tom Cruise?
Mr. Anderson. Mr. Anderson.
Tom Cruise. He's one of those guys. Yeah, Tom Cruise, like he is, like, they couldn't find his son. So he spends the whole film depressed.
And like, that's the reason he does anything in that film. And that bit when he went in Manorto Port, where Elrond goes, Mr. Anderson. Oh, fuck it, Elrond.
You need to go for a wee wee Mr. Anderson. Sir, listen, you have to jump about three boobs there to get what alien language Matt was talking. Mr.
Anderson. You want to go for a wee wee Mr. Anderson? How are you going to do that with no dickhole?
And then Johnny Reeves goes, Aah! This isn't my answer. Are you going to do that with no dickhole? Yeah.
That's seen you just written down there. It's a scene from a scary movie. Yeah. How are you going to pee without a go dick?
You want to go for a wee wee Mr. Anderson? What good is a penis? No dickhole.
Aah! Bring out the urinal, boys. You can watch. Uselessly.
As everyone else, Pee-Pee's. Then he wakes up and bed and he's pissed himself. And then he's got a blinking light on his computer. And he says, you got an email.
And he says, he's Pee-Pee's self again. Just come to the Y Rabbit Club. I would say, go back to school, you little bitch. Yes, the Y Rabbit Club is just an incontenteed.
It's like a support group. The whole Matrix film rewritten around the guy who just pissed himself. He's got nightmares that they can piss himself. Take the red pill.
And you'll piss forever. Take the blue pill. You go home. Piss only sometimes.
Again, regain control of your bladder. Right against the machine plays at the end. But a jet stream of piss. And he takes off.
The Matrix screen is just yellow. Yellow streams coming down. Oh, God. How do we get to this?
Jetpack piss. Oh, fuck it all. They're always Mr. Humbung.
They're always Jetpack piss. Oh, it's really hard to keep up with you today. Sorry, I mean, extra radiation. Yeah, that's.
I remember last week's deleted scenes. I was talking about me just sort of jumping through a few loops to get to me, actually saying anything about the Ed Sheeran theory. I think I'm just going to get a audio standing at the moment. All you want to hear is piss.
Piss. All right, so from the deluxe blue flame we've got, my hands are too big for this guitar. Now it's down because it's a surprisingly silly title. As in like, when you read it out loud, it sounds so stupid.
Also, there's two ways we can take this. So guys playing a ukulele and doesn't know what ukulele is. This is a funny image. It's just like my hands are too big.
It's like he doesn't think he tells too far. He's just like strumming. I'm so big for this guitar. Oh, it is definitely Brendan Fraser as one.
It's hands are just really big. I think that's true. So here's how I see it. This is about someone who does something for power.
Okay. Right. That they regret. Almost telltale heart like.
Okay. So there's a band, very famous band. Yeah, let's call them the killers. Yeah, let's call them the the the the author pods.
Yeah. Yeah. And and smashing pumpkin. Yeah.
And one of their members, you know, there's this tension. They're very, very big. They're very, very like popular. There's tension within the band.
Right. And some of the band is starting to think like maybe it's one person, the guitarist maybe needs to go because they're like causing too much problem, too many problems. Yeah. Yeah.
He's got to be too big for his boobs. Exactly. It's all popping. Bit of a bit of a bit of a sticky stardust.
Yeah. Right. But it's Brendan Fraser. No.
No. Right. Fraser. Yeah.
Killed him. Oh, right. And the band. I just like we've got a new guitarist.
It is so sad that this man died. Yeah. But we've got a new guitarist, right? Brendan Fraser killed him to get the chance to be the guitarist of this band.
But one of the iconic things about the band was this guitar and the guitarist and all the bass and the bass. And he takes over the guitar. Yeah. And now he's he can't play this tiny guitar.
Right. Oh, so we're doing both. Yeah. He's kind of a small guitar, but also the hands are huge.
Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Right.
It's kind of like in Kirsten Joy Division because he plays guitar on level terras apart. It's got like a teardrop guitar that looks ridiculously tiny. It's so uncomfortable. Yeah.
It looks so uncomfortable to wear and play. I think it's like that. Like the strap is too small. Yeah.
It's all style. But for that for the now get dead guitarist. It was the right shape for his body. It was the right.
It was it was it was just like that was their style and style has to continue because the band is important. Yeah. It's very much a Billy Sheer situation. Yes.
Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I like this because it's got the Paul is dead theory, which is hilarious. So yeah, the killer, well, the guy dies in the car crash.
Yeah. Invert comments. What was he doing in the comments? He was.
And because the band like it's Brendan Fraser was the guy, the original guy. And they got this look alike to come in. Brendan Fraser. Brendan Fraser.
Yeah. Yeah. But it's like we put these. I think Paul Bettany's playing the drummer.
Yeah. I think I was his name who presents the American traitors. Oh, Alan coming. Alan coming is from ma'am.
Yeah. No, maybe. Yeah. I think I'm coming is like the singer.
I thought Brendan Fraser would be the singer. Who's the sort of John Lennon to this poor McCum? I think maybe they share. Yeah.
Maybe it's like Alan coming and I'm going to Fraser at least two. Yeah, yeah. I'll probably say like if you're going for Alan coming character, someone who's been in Fraser before, John Hannah. Jonathan from the Mummy.
Sure. That would work. Yeah, that would work. I'm just thinking like I want both the same sort of body type.
Yeah, I'm definitely it's got to be a twink. Yeah. You got to be a twink. You got the feminine, the feminine guy and then Brendan Fraser's a hunk of meat.
Yeah. You know, I'm both of them. Yeah. Think about what that says about the Beatles.
The feminine John Lennon, the hunk of meat, poor McCum. And the other two. The funny one and the quiet one. Those are the four types from any boy.
The hunk of meat, the feminine one, the funny one and the shy one. Yeah. There you go. And in Harry Styles, you got all four.
Yeah, you got all four. Yeah. He's a hunk of femininity. He's a shy.
He's funny. It's funny because he shouldn't speak. So yeah, we got a poor bat named John Hannah, Brendan Fraser. Yeah.
The shy one, the one that we never see in the background. What's the name plays, played Bowie? Who played Bowie? Yeah.
In something or other. Tilda Swinton. Yes. Wow.
Yeah. When she played Bowie? At some point, I can't remember. In a movie, I think.
The funny thing is, I'm imagining that. Yeah. When you said, like, what woman could possibly play David Bowie? The first one I came out with was Tilda Swinton.
I know Kate Blanchitt's played Bob Dylan. She was in. She didn't play Bowie. She was in a Bowie.
We did a video from his last album. Right. Gotcha. They were friends.
Yeah. Why I thought, am I thinking, oh, hang on. He's cold. I'm not leaving this in the cold.
I'm thinking of potentially, I'm thinking of Julian Anderson as Bowie. Oh, in God's. But, like, I'm sure there's been a talk of a Bowie movie in which Tilda Swinton and others play Bowie. If characters.
That makes a lot of sense. Not like Bob Dylan. Yeah. Anyway, cool.
Tilda Swinton is the fastest. Right. Cool. Cool.
You want to put Sean on your head? Yeah. She's a shy one. She's a theory of shine.
A theory of shine. Like George Harrison, the end of his career. Yeah. Theorial and shine.
And so, yeah, they get him in. He looks just like dead guitarist from that. He's a big honka meat. He's more so a honka meat because his hands.
He's got slightly big hands. Not slightly. Like, the everywhere, everything, everywhere, once sausage. I'm thinking that.
Or, like, you know when a cartoon gets their hand ran over by a train? Yeah. And it's like, woo, woo, woo. Like, yeah.
Yeah. Like, pulsating, red. Like, yeah. We've got to get these prosthetic hands on.
Like, basically, like, another inch of, like, skin. And back home, when he was only, when he played guitar, that's fine. He played a big, old guitar. He's got a mask of a guitar.
He's really good at guitar. But this guitar, this iconic guitar is what he needs to play. And he's like, I can't go on stage like this. I can't play guitar.
Well, first off, they need to teach him how to play guitar for one. And, yeah, he can't, he's just rubbish at it. He's got no, he's like, well, maybe we can take one guitar away. It might not be as good, but at least we'll get the people dancing.
But it's just where the fans don't like it. No, it's singing voice. And then there's, basically, the band start getting cancelled gigs. Yeah.
Going downhill. Everyone's starting to blame Brendan Fraser. Despite the fact that he was doing it, you know, he wanted to power it. But, like, it becomes clear that this band would predispose the tear apart.
You know, a person in Brendan Fraser's position. No, they had a toxic, they had a toxic relationship. It's like killing his Brendan Fraser. They think he's going to, he thinks they're going to try and kill him again.
Yeah. But in this, in this moment, he's out back of a, of a, of a, of a, of a, of a cancel show. The crowd is booing and hissing and stuff. Yeah.
And there's a lot, low, right? As one of the bands storms off stage. Yeah. And Brendan Fraser is already, he's already gone.
He's already come off stage. He's been sent off stage. Yeah. And he's crying.
Right. And well, my guitar slowly drinks. It's all about how sad he is that he can't play this tiny guitar. Yeah.
And the, but he's still miked up. Yeah. He still miked up. Everyone's hearing this beautiful song about how his guitar is slowly drinking.
And they think, oh man. And then the news picks it up and says, does honk of meat Brendan Fraser have a degenerative hand growing condition? And they start, they start having like, they start, they explode. The answer is yes.
And it is. So they get popular again. Like, oh, this, this hand thing and stuff is nice. And then we never learn why the original Brendan Fraser got killed.
Yeah. It's hard to get too big. So they kill up his Brendan Fraser. Brendan's like, wow, there's so many look alike.
And it's the management that are cloning Brendan. And they all, they go to a cloning facility and realise that all being cloned. Yeah. The bands?
Well, I'll say we should stick with the second Brendan Fraser. I didn't know the one we started with. But they discover just as the band are about to kill him again. Yeah.
That the management have put this into their heads and that the management are cloning all of them. Yeah. And the problem has been that, but mainly they started this program because they knew that Brendan Fraser had a degenerative hand growing condition. Yeah.
That only a fresh Brendan Fraser can play the tiny guitar that's iconic. They're trying to, this is just pointing out how far record companies go. Yeah, this is about how record companies tried to capture lightning in the bottle and tried to keep the image of the band the same despite the people who were in the band changing. A true modern western.
Yeah. I had this image of like, at the start, at the very start, I did have an image of like, you know, it's like rock and roll, cotton western, it's like, you know, it stands, whatever. But like, I think it's just a stupid biopic of a boy band. Yeah.
The boys are just going to be named the boy band. I don't know. It was like, the author puns. Oh, yeah.
And I'm thinking boys forever. Boys forever. Yes. So good.
Yeah. Like a ship and Okeo. Yeah. Yeah.
I think, well, I think they push back against their company, right? They literally take the place by storm. I didn't know they stormed the fortress that is the record company. Yeah.
To liberate these clones, you know, and then see a bit of what Western in there. Yeah. And then the thing is, right, they do that. Their star fades because other record companies bring out their clones they've already been doing.
And as they age their star fades, but they're happy about it. Yeah. One big house, Tom, with four, till the Swittens, four Brendan phrases, well, three Brendan phrases. Yeah.
John Hannah's and Paul Benny's Paul and four Paul Benny's and they're all living together in bunk beds. Yeah. And they're happy that their star is fading. They're happy that they are allowed to grow old rather than being killed in their youth in 2023.
It's 27. Yeah. That's what was happening. Oh, wow.
You haven't forgotten we could work that in as well. That's a fun, fun, not a modern Western place. Really? It's a, but they get a ranch.
That's what it's a game. Okay. Right. Yeah.
We put one on a ranch. The rest of your fucking straws. Yeah. I think that the owner of the record companies played by Kevin Costner or something and he's wearing a cowboy hat the whole time.
He's like, I'm going to keep these cattle under lock and key. Yeah. Very much like an old West or a Barrett or something. Hello.
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