Life's a Pitch Podcast
by Matt and Tom
Life's a Pitch brings together bizarre, strange and ultimately un-makeable film ideas and pitches for your enjoyment! Every week our two hosts, Matt and Tom are given a ridiculous film title from which to improvise a movie plot. Will it be utter rubbish? Or will it be the defining creative work of a generation? Only time will tell! Do you like the show? Want to help it continue to improve and evolve? Want to get extra content? Support us at: http://www.patreon.com/lifesapitchpodcast
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Episodes
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Episode 566: Terry Grew a Wormhole in the Backyard!
We pitch COSMIC HORROR movies this episode, and find out just how strange Eurovision can get once Wogan gets involved with quantum physics! Other movies pitched: Check Engine Light is Blinking Mike's House
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Deleted Scenes: Just a few more tokens, bro
There are two full pitches in this episode of the deleted scenes! We create a cult with only two people in it, and then pitch a cult horror about joker's goons!
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Episode 565: House of Cows
Cult Horror meets The Traitors as production of a social deception game show is rocked to its core by one very charismatic player. "Genuinely very disturbing" - Us. Other movies pitched: The Tripadvisor Murders Behold the Gritty
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Deleted Scenes: Discord the App (with Riley Rose)
In this week's deleted scenes Riley and Matt pitch an ad to show that the world's most gamer-choked social media app is actually also for yer nan! We also talk ads, cynicism and the way ai commercials make everyone in them look like a rube.
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Episode 564: Freeeej! (Adverts with Riley Rose)
Riley Rose is back to help Matt pitch some ad campaigns during this one-off special! Prepare to get berated by Brie Larson dressed as a bear, cucked by Tony the Tiger as you eat shampoo for breakfast, and jacked into the mainframe in Hackers (1995) the Board Game
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Deleted Scenes: Elvis Aint Dead (with Aiden Pyne)
We hear how IT traumatised a young Aiden, pitch a Yesterday world where Life's a Pitch never existed, and find out what happens when a superstar dies on the toilet just as a baby is born on the other side of the world.
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Episode 563: Feel Good Ink (with Aiden Pyne)
This week we're joined by Aiden Pyne pitch movies based on popular song titles! In so doing, we uncover a "lost" Philip K Dick book and create a world where grief is only a matter of running out of the good stuff. Other movies pitched: Pump Up the Jam Booty
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Deleted Scenes: The Least Wanted Man in Tulsa
We chat weird westerns, and pitch a strange character comedy about an aspiring foreign cowboy Thanks for downloading the Deleted Scenes for episode 562 of the Life's a Pitch Podcast! If you haven't already, we recommend listening to this week's main episode, at least then you'll have context for...
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Episode 562: The Disappearing Saloon
This week we pitch a Western ghost story as one modern teen is transported to a strange western world, he finds solace in the easy justice and power of being a gun-toting cowboy. But when his deeds and fantasies spill into the real world, he'll have to figure out who he really is. Other movies...
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Deleted Scenes: It's Grim Up North
We pitch an Odyssey of London businessmen trying to get up to Edinburgh after the train breaks down, then Tom isn't allowed to talk about Christopher Nolan but we end up doing so anyway. Finally we examine the long awaited "Dev Patel W*nk*ng Theory"
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Episode 561: The "Do My Evil Bidding" Soup
We pitch some "Dark" fantasy. After poisoning his liege-lord, Gordon Ramsay goes out on the road, cooking up soup and blagging his way to the top. Surely those mysterious strangers offering him ingredients were simply good samaritans, right? Other movies pitched: The Long March to Dragon's Hole…
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Deleted Scenes: A Stinky Wes Anderson Movie (With Jessie Syme)
Have you ever smelt a Wes Anderson movie?
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Episode 560: Who Ate All The Pies (With Jessie Syme)
This week we're joined by Jessie from the Hail Chaos podcast to pitch some film noir movies! Other pitches include: The Defective Robot Detective The Night Of Too Many Narrators
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Deleted Scenes: PAIN au Chocolat (with Dave Bulmer)
We chat fighting movies and taking a franchise to space with Dave, but not before creating yet another messed up Charlie and the Chocolate factory sequel. These are the deleted scenes for episode 559 of the Life's a Pitch podcast. Probably listen to that first, eh?
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Episode 559: Derek's Left Hook Inc. (With Dave Bulmer)
Dave's back and this time helping us to pitch some hard-hitting fight movies! Derek believes that violence is wrong, but why does it keep solving so many problems? Other movies pitched: Monk Fight: Fighting Friar with Friar What do you mean my car insurance doesn't cover getting destroyed by a...
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Deleted Scenes: This Guy (With Terri Silver)
We chat about all the Biopics we can remember, after taking the genre to its logical conclusion by making a movie about the least remarkable person imaginable. These are the Deleted Scenes for episode 558 of the Life's a Pitch Podcast, we recommend listening to the main episode first. Or don't,...
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Episode 558: Orlando (with Terri Silver)
Terri Silver (of Side Quest fame) helps us pitch some very accurate biopics, including the true origin story of the Disney renaissance, when a mysterious and beautiful boy is found blooming out of a flower in the drained Florida swamp. Other movies pitched: Get your own Benson Phillips I'm the…
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Deleted Scenes: I Matched with my Smart Fridge on Tinder
Gotta be real with you on this one, folks. The majority of this hour-long audio file is just a deep dive into Hackers (1995) and its impact on the movie industry for the 20 years that followed. I write this with no shame attached, just a fair warning that this is the kind of podcast deleted…
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Episode 557: Uninstall My Dongle
This week we pitch we're hacking the mainframe in some retro cyber movies. One local vicar finds himself embroiled in a cyber attack as he plugs in a mysterious usb drive in an internet cafe. Other movies pitched: You wouldn't download this movie World Wide Weapon
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Deleted Scenes 90% chance of Alien Invasion (With Eden Jackson)
We pitch a sideways look at life when alien invasion becomes the norm, talk about the Paranormal Genre, and give ourselves an extra challenge for pitching!
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Episode 556: Par - A Normal Golf Course (With Eden Jackson)
We delve into the creepypasta-derived world of backrooms-style horror with Eden Jackson, as a group of teenagers find themselves trapped on an endless golf course. Bride of Mothman Emily Blunt's Haunted Retirement Home
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Deleted Scenes: The Mascot in the Mansuit (With Hail Chaos)
A terrifying murderer is stalking the town of Chicago, Gritty is on the prowl, but investigating his case leads to a look into the unsettling psychological world of mascots. We also chat cynicism and mascot movies with Hail Chaos
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Episode 555: The Frostie Movie - It's grrrreat (With Hail Chaos)
We're joined by Alex Garrick-Wright and Jessie Syme of the Hail Chaos podcast to pitch some Mascot movies, and find ourselves in a world of conspiracy and wonder, as teens break into the factory which made exactly one enormous Frostie, and are chased by a real tiger. Other movies pitched: the...
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Hail Chaos - Episode 1 - A tale Of high Adventure!
https://soundcloud.com/lifesapitchpodcast/hail-chaos
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Hail Chaos - Episode 1 - A Tale Of High Adventure!
There is no new episode of Life's a Pitch this week as we ran out of time to edit... BUT! Here is the first episode of Hail Chaos! The roleplaying podcast hosted by Alex Garrick-Wright with Tom and Jessie Syme. If you like this episode, there is plenty more where that came from, follow the show…
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Deleted Scenes: Don't Eat This Book
A hellish nightmare unfolds as a mysterious book finds its way into a culinary school library We talk about Project Hail Mary, Matt throws more shade on Interstellar, we discuss the telltale signs of a book adaptation, and we're all just glad Tom's back aren't we everyone?
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Episode 554: Handy Books of Bees
Tom's back! and we're right back at it pitching movie adaptations to books we haven't read. A coming of age movie meets The Fly as one boy finds a magical book that solves almost none of his teenage problems! Other movies pitched: A Year at the Movies Dracula Cha Cha Cha
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Deleted Scenes: Spycraft 101 (with Riley Routh)
Matt and Riley pitch a conspiracy thriller, proving that it's not *always* Tom's fault. We also talk about Daniel Radcliffe a LOT and for some reason spiral into dialogue about sitcom reboots.
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Episode 553 - Mums the Word (With Riley Routh)
While Tom's away, Matt & Riley pitch some family spy movies, what do you do when your Spy Mother goes missing, and the only person you can call for a lift is her hapless new boyfriend? Charlie Day, Kate Blanchett and Henry Cavill (but aged down in a time machine) star in this feel-good family…
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Deleted Scenes: Big Whoop (With Guy Kelly)
We're joined by Guy Kelly to talk Kaiju movies and rickety old rollercoasters. These are the deleted scenes! Go back and listen to the main episode if you want something even remotely coherent.
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Episode 552 - Big Bird: the Reckoning (with Guy Kelly)
This week we're joined by Guy Kelly (brainmage.bsky.social) to pitch some gigantic kaiju movies! The world is shocked by the attack on new york by an enormous Big Bird some years after his death on the challenger space shuttle disaster. Now a team of felted journalists are going to get to the...
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Deleted Scenes: Why Do Anything?
Tom has some gripes about content creators and we talk about the murder mystery genre and pitch another movie! Enjoy!
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Episode 551: Whoopsie Doo! Assassination at the Themed Family Restaurant
We get some star-studded ensemble casts going this week as we pitch some murder mystery movies this week! Other pitches include: Richard Osman Strikes Again Uno Reverse
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Deleted Scenes: Only You May Defeat Beatle Mania
Matt chats about Sean Bean's Birdwatching podcast, and we pitch a strange 60s rock n roll musical conspiracy
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Episode 550: The Crystal Pepsi Years
This week we pitch "Historical Epics", and as you can tell from the title it went very well and stayed totally in-genre. Other movies pitched: I'm the emperor, what are you gonna do, stab me? How We Made 'Dude Where's My Car?'
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Deleted Scenes: The "I Learned Nothing" Moment
We discuss Harry Hill's new podcast and the Space Opera Genre and pitch a new movie!
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Episode 549: Johnny Comet's Gonna Vomit
We pitch some space opera's this week and come up with an eighties college comedy. Other pitches include; The Three Tenors Galactic tour Solar Lottery
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Deleted Scenes: All Things Considered I'd Rather Keep My Job
A very grounded contemporary drama in which Bradley Cooper lives in your walls. We also chat about the suspension of disbelief and what "contemporary drama" means.
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Episode 548: He's more Hole Than Donut
This week we pitch (questionably) contemporary (questionably) drama (questionably) movies. A pair of twins struggle with their need for patriarchal approval after their father reveals he's dying. Seriously, that's the movie. It's definitely a normal drama movie. Other movies pitched: God these…
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Deleted Scenes: Fockers-In-Law
Who asked for this?!
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Episode 547: Street Fighter (Films of 2026)
We look ahead to films coming out in 2026 and ask "what if we made them?" Other pitches include; Madden The RIP
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Deleted Scenes: The Christmas Trees' Revenge
We pitch a sequel to Macbeth in which Matt finally figures out how to spell the place where Macbeth lives. Most of this though, is us critiquing Star Trek movies. So do stick around for that too.
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Episode 546: Where Did That Receipt Go
This week we're pitching (slightly belated) xmas horror movies, but it's ok! This one is themed around having to take back an awful piece of haunted tat to the store. Perfect for the new year! Other movies pitched: The Caroling A dog is for death, not just for xmas
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Deleted Scenes: Bad Burglars (With Dave Bulmer)
We pitch another Family Feud movie with Dave and talk about certain scenes from Deck The Halls. (Spoilers for Deck The Halls btw)
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Episode 545: My Neighbour's Reindeer Wants Me Dead (With Dave Bulmer)
We're joined by our Christmas correspondent Dave Bulmer to pitch some Christmas family feud movies!
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Deleted Scenes: Quickfire Xmas Ads
This week's Deleted Scenes is chock-full of extra pitches, as we smash through loads of ads at the start and the end of the show. Including: Burgers! Durex! Soulless Gemini ads! The Smell of Sheffield! Captain Dingle's Old Fashioned Navy Beans! And much much more!
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Episode 544: Xmas Ad Campaigns 2 - Santa Juice
This week we're delving back into the reason for the season, rampant commercialism. What better way to celebrate than creating cynical ad campaigns made to tug on your heartstrings?
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Deleted Scenes: Jetpack P**s
We pitch a modern western about a boyband and chat about the genre as a whole
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Episode 543: The Town That Was Just Big Enough
We approach some modern problems with old, rugged solutions this week as we pitch some modern westerns! Other film pitched include: How Silicon Was My Valley The Sheriff's Inbox
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Deleted Scenes: The Ed Sheeran Yesterday Theory
We discuss some music based film ideas, along with a pretty out there theory for why Ed Sheeran is popular, and pitch another movie!
About this show
Life's a Pitch brings together bizarre, strange and ultimately un-makeable film ideas and pitches for your enjoyment! Every week our two hosts, Matt and Tom are given a ridiculous film title from which to improvise a movie plot. Will it be utter rubbish? Or will it be the defining creative work of a generation? Only time will tell! Do you like the show? Want to help it continue to improve and evolve? Want to get extra content? Support us at: http://www.patreon.com/lifesapitchpodcast
Hosted by
Matt and Tom
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