Ep 145: Therapist Moms: Coping with Burnout, Vicarious Trauma, and a Heavy World

Navigating the Political Climate as a Therapist Mom: Real Talk, Practical Strategies, and Permission to Protect Your CapacityThis episode of The Therapist Mom Podcast is packed with honest, practical insights for therapists and moms navigating an increasingly complex world. If you’re exhausted by current events, overwhelmed by the demands of private practice and motherhood, or just wondering how to support your clients, your kids, and yourself without burning out, you’re in the right place.As someone who’s been building a practice—and a family—while advocating for better systems for therapist moms, I know just how heavy and relentless life can feel right now. But I also know (both personally and from connecting with colleagues like Dara Friedman Wheeler, Jamie Bodenlos, and Jenny Hughes) that sometimes, small shifts—like giving yourself permission to rest, or simply speaking truthfully about your struggles—can make the difference between surviving and thriving.In this roundtable episode, we’re diving into what it means to protect our capacity as therapist moms in this charged climate, how to talk to our kids about tough topics, and why honoring your limits is more powerful than pretending you have it all together. You’ll hear validation, actionable ideas, and maybe that one thing you needed to hear today to finally give yourself a break.If you’ve been looking for a space to feel seen, understood, and gently challenged to prioritize YOU, you are absolutely in the right place.What You’ll Learn in This Episode1. How to manage emotional overwhelm (as a therapist and a mom): Real talk about why “having it all together” is a myth, and how checking in with yourself can help you navigate daily ups and downs.2. Strategies for values-driven parenting and hard conversations: Practical approaches to shaping your family’s values, talking with kids about what’s happening in the world, and why your small, honest conversations matter more than perfection.3. Practical self-protection tools for therapist moms: Learn how to assess your real capacity, set gentle boundaries, and choose social engagement that feels meaningful (without guilt)—even in seasons when you can’t be on the front lines.Episode Timestamps00:02 - Welcoming listeners, roundtable intro, and episode context—how political realities affect therapist moms.00:53 - Personal reflections: How has the past year impacted us as moms, women, and therapists? No one has a playbook.10:01 - Navigating burnout and boundaries—choosing where and how to engage in activism and self-care.24:07 - Age-appropriate talks: How we discuss stressful current events and values with young kids, teens, and our clients.40:55 - Gauging your own capacity—when to lean in, when to pull back in work, activism, and home life.52:48 - Re-defining rest and community: The choir metaphor, the power of deep rest, and redefining what “doing the work” can look like for you.01:00:00 - Final roundtable—what do you say to a fellow therapist mom who feels completely depleted right now?Top Takeaways on Protecting Your Capacity as a Therapist Mom1. You’re Not Supposed to Have It All Together (And That’s Okay)Let’s break this down: The myth that therapists “should” be handling the world better than everyone else is exactly that—a myth. Jenny Hughes shares candidly in this episode that despite supporting trauma therapists herself, she still struggles to turn off, draw boundaries, and honor her real-life limits. We hear it again and again: you are human first. Let’s give ourselves the same kindness (and reality checks) we give to our clients. Think: less guilt, more permission.Relatable moment: When Jamie Bodenlos admits, “I can’t do it all anymore—I actually cut back my clients because physically and emotionally, I couldn’t keep going at that pace.” Let’s normalize adjusting our expectations with each season of life.2. Parenting from Your Values—One Honest Conversation at a TimeHere’s how you can start implementing this TODAY:Step 1: Clarify your family values—consider sitting down with your partner (or even with your kids, if they’re older) to name what matters most: kindness, justice, standing up for others.Step 2: Make these values visible: hang a list on your fridge, revisit them together, and let them grow along with your kids.Step 3 (Pro tip): Use daily life moments (not just big, scary events) as springboards for conversations about respect, disagreement, and compassion—the small talks add up.As Dara Friedman Wheeler puts it, “Let your kids see you live your values—whether that means attending vigils, supporting friends, or simply standing up for kindness. It all counts.”3. Permission to Rest, Step Back, and Redefine “Doing Enough”We all make mistakes, but let’s save you the headache. Here’s what NOT to do:Mistake 1: Believing you HAVE to be on the front lines of every cause, even at your own expense. Your body, your energy, and your mental health matter as much as any social justice fight.Mistake 2: Comparing your “season” to someone else’s highlight reel—especially on social media.Mistake 3: Waiting to rest until you’ve earned it, or shaming yourself for needing a pause. (Spoiler: Deep rest is WORK. And it’s vital.)What helps instead? Claim tiny moments of rest, seek connection with supportive peers, and let your “work” look different in different seasons. You don’t have to carry the whole load—sometimes your presence, or your voice, or your simple act of being, is enough.Resources Mentioned in This EpisodeEmbrace Race: Tools and guides for talking to kids about race and hard topics.NCTSN (National Child Traumatic Stress Network): Resources for parents and clinicians navigating trauma.Has Your Child Been Traumatized? by Melissa Goldberg Mintz: Book for parents on trauma support for children.Jenny Hughes, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and leading voice on vicarious trauma and resilience for helping professionals. She is the author of The PTSD Recovery Workbook and Triggers to Glimmers: A Vicarious Resilience Journal and Workbook, and the founder of The BRAVE Trauma Therapist Collective — a community dedicated to helping trauma therapists reclaim their energy and confidence so they can end the day with something left for themselves. In her clinical work, Jenny specializes in trauma and PTSD using Brainspotting, EMDR, and Cognitive Processing Therapy.Website: braveproviders.comInstagram: @braveprovidersFree Resource: Vicarious Trauma Tracker + bonus mini-course → braveproviders.com/vttrackerDr. Jamie Bodenlos is a licensed clinical psychologist in New York and a professor of psychological science at Hobart and William Smith Colleges. A Fellow of the Society of Behavioral Medicine, she has authored over 50 peer-reviewed publications and teaches courses in cognitive behavior therapy, clinical psychology, and behavioral medicine. She is co-author of Being the Change: A Guide for Advocates and Activists on Staying Healthy, Inspired, and Driven (2023), a practical resource for those doing deeply meaningful — and deeply demanding — work.Book: tinyurl.com/beingthechangebookDr. Dara Friedman-Wheeler is a licensed clinical psychologist in Maryland and a research psychologist at the Henry M. Jackson Foundation/Uniformed Services University of the Health Sciences. She is also on the speakers' faculty of the Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy and regularly leads workshops on CBT for those in the helping professions and social justice fields. She is co-author of Being the Change: A Guide for Advocates and Activists on Staying Healthy, Inspired, and Driven (2023).Website: drfriedmanwheeler.comBook: tinyurl.com/beingthechangebookJoin us for Therapist Mom Networking Meetup — a casual space to connect with other therapist moms, share what’s working in your practice, talk through challenges, and build real community. No pressure, no pitching — just support