Ep 15- Is He Really the One?

from "Love, Sex, Lies and Reality" Talks · host Kemi Sogunle

As women, we have the desire to meet the one but without healing from our childhood pain/trauma, those emotional wounds lead us to create fantasies and illusions about 'Prince Charming.' The image of the man from the fantasies is mostly a reflection of the father we never had...the love we never received as a child, the abuse we have gone through, the abandonment/rejection/neglect. The image of the rescuer is what drives us into the arms of the wrong partner. You meet him and he expresses his fears but without paying attention to the words he utters, your emotions result in self-abandonment while you try to convince him to love and rescue you.  He sees the opportunity to soothe his own pain/trauma and you both trauma bond. It is all about convenience not #commitment. It is a transactional relationship and not healthy but toxic.  The intense of the pain you both bear and have not healed from seem like chemistry but it is unhealthy emotional attachment. He gets his way to the cookie jar when you give yourself up with the hope that your relationship will get to the next level. This is how you self-abandon and self-sabotage. He will deplete you and leave you. You have to understand that he does not know who he is at the stage neither do you. You are both soothing your emotional wounds than healing from them.  He is not the one but the one to awaken you to why you need to heal and not settle or give up your body for a moment of pleasure.  I have been there myself and walked the healing journey. I became a certified life coach and NLP to help others find who they are, heal their souls and become the love they need to attract. He was never into you. He is not the one for you. You attracted him based on where you are with yourself and who you are at the moment. Reality is that you deserve better. You deserve to be loved. You deserve someone who is a reflection of you. This is why you have to heal yourself so that you can attract the healthy and healed partner. This is why I created the Purposeful Relationship Inner Circle to support you on healing from emotional pain/trauma so that you can stop selling yourself short and become the love you wish to attract. I invite you to come into the Inner Circle to learn more. Signing off, Kemi Sogunle www.kemisogunle.com

What this episode covers

As women, we have the desire to meet the one but without healing from our childhood pain/trauma, those emotional wounds lead us to create fantasies and illusions about 'Prince Charming.' The image of the man from the fantasies is mostly a reflection of the father we never had...the love we never received as a child, the abuse we have gone through, the abandonment/rejection/neglect. The image of the rescuer is what drives us into the arms of the wrong partner. You meet him and he expresses his fears but without paying attention to the words he utters, your emotions result in self-abandonment while you try to convince him to love and rescue you. He sees the opportunity to soothe his own pain/trauma and you both trauma bond. It is all about convenience not #commitment. It is a transactional relationship and not healthy but toxic. The intense of the pain you both bear and have not healed from seem like chemistry but it is unhealthy emotional attachment. He gets his way to the cookie jar when you give yourself up with the hope that your relationship will get to the next level. This is how you self-abandon and self-sabotage. He will deplete you and leave you. You have to understand that he does not know who he is at the stage neither do you. You are both soothing your emotional wounds than healing from them. He is not the one but the one to awaken you to why you need to heal and not settle or give up your body for a moment of pleasure. I have been there myself and walked the healing journey. I became a certified life coach and NLP to help others find who they are, heal their souls and become the love they need to attract. He was never into you. He is not the one for you. You attracted him based on where you are with yourself and who you are at the moment. Reality is that you deserve better. You deserve to be loved. You deserve someone who is a reflection of you. This is why you have to heal yourself so that you can attract the healthy and healed partner. This is why I created the Purposeful Relationship Inner Circle to support you on healing from emotional pain/trauma so that you can stop selling yourself short and become the love you wish to attract. I invite you to come into the Inner Circle to learn more. Signing off, Kemi Sogunle www.kemisogunle.com