EP 6: Exploring Non-Monogamy and Kink: Dating Beyond Norms

This episode is an invitation to think outside of normative relationships and even potentially lead you to question what we've been taught about love, commitment, connection, and relationshipsPolyamory and kink are often misunderstood or even stigmatized, but here’s the truth: the more we understand the spectrum of human desire, the more permission we give ourselves to date — and love — more authentically.EPISODE TIMELINE00:45 - Intro & expanding relationship perspectives03:30 - Eric's background as a relationship therapist05:20 - Demystifying kink and non-monogamy08:45 - Defining consensual non-monogamy11:30 - Understanding kink beyond stigma14:15 - Developing self-agency in relationships18:40 - Primary vs reactive emotions24:30 - Communication pitfalls and solutions29:15 - Navigating jealousy and insecurity36:20 - Steps for exploring non-monogamy42:00 - When partners disagree about non-monogamy47:30 - Exploring kink safely54:00 - Final advice: Interrogate your desiresIN THIS EPISODE WE EXPLOREHow to develop self-agency in relationships - the key to all relationship successThe crucial difference between primary and reactive emotions that transforms communicationWhy "interrogating yourself" is essential before exploring non-monogamy or kinkHow jealousy can become a pathway to growth rather than relationship destruction Essential resources for safe exploration of alternative relationship dynamicsRESOURCES MENTIONED:Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue JohnsonPolysecure by Jessica FernThe Ethical Slut by Janet HardyCome As You Are by Emily NagoskiBad Sex by Nona Willis Aronowitz"It's through this self-interrogation that we learn about ourselves and then we can communicate that to others and then we suddenly are living a more satisfying life. I love this topic, again, not because I feel like the way of the future is kink or the way of the future is non-monogamy or polyamory, but because it is crucial in all of our lives, I believe, that we look into things that society might have said, no, don't look in this box or don't look in this box."- Eric FawcettCONNECT WITH ERICEric Fawcett is a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist specializing in helping intimate partnerships effectively navigate concerns ranging from communication, to sexuality, to trust ruptures, and beyond. Before pursuing his MFT degree, Fawcett spent three decades as a recording artist, as a creative entrepreneur, and as a published writer and speaker addressing the relational joys and challenges of the collaborative process.Fawcett has long believed that the training that relational therapists receive prepares them to work with people-systems far beyond couples and families. In his private practice — Attune Relational Wellness — Eric also works with organizations seeking to increase trust and cohesion among its members. Eric is an enthusiastically affirmative LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC ally and advocate, and welcomes clients regardless of faith tradition or socio-political viewpoint.More about Eric at his private practice website: www.attunerelational.comSTAY CONNECTED WITH MADDEN:Madden's Instagram: ⁠@maddenzappa⁠✨If you loved this episode, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review! And remember, we do not gatekeep when it comes to dating smarter so be sure to share it with a friend!