Ep 90, Understanding Porn Addiction and the Path to Healing from a Pastoral Perspective

⚠️ Disclaimer This episode discusses pornography, sexual immorality, betrayal trauma, and marital restoration. While no explicit details are shared, the themes may be emotionally triggering. Listen with care and step away if needed.   Episode Summary Pornography is one of the quietest home-wreckers in Christian marriages—not because people don’t care, but because they’re afraid to talk about it. In this episode, we sit down with Pastor Ben Brinkman of Canvas Church to unpack the spiritual, emotional, and relational impact of pornography from a pastoral perspective. We talk honestly about betrayal, repentance, biblical grounds for divorce, and the hidden damage that ongoing pornography use can cause. Whether you’re the one struggling or the spouse carrying the weight of secrecy and lies, this conversation offers clarity, hope, and a path toward healing. 👤 Guest: Pastor Ben Brinkman, Canvas Church – San Diego Pastor Ben and his wife Katie have been in ministry since 1999 and are passionate about helping people grow in faith and experience real transformation. Known for his humor, biblical clarity, and practical teaching, Pastor Ben brings a grounded, grace-filled perspective to this difficult conversation.   🗣️ What We Discuss in This Episode Why pornography is often a hidden root issue in struggling marriages Whether pornography use qualifies as a form of infidelity How betrayal trauma impacts the heart and mind of the wounded spouse Where pornography fits within Jesus’ teaching on sexual immorality in Matthew 19 The emotional and spiritual fallout of repeated lying, gaslighting, or secrecy What true repentance looks like—and when someone needs professional help How pastors and churches can better support BOTH spouses without pressure or shame Why “just reconcile” can be harmful when safety and emotional well-being are ignored What someone should know if they’re realizing, "This is my marriage..."   💛 Listener Reflection (Outro) Before you close this episode, take a breath. Whatever came up—grief, conviction, anger, clarity—those feelings matter. If you’re struggling with pornography, freedom begins with honesty, not hiding. If you’ve been betrayed, you’re allowed to seek safety, healing, and truth. You are not weak or unspiritual for needing support beyond prayer. Jesus’ teaching on sexual immorality is meant to protect hearts, not shame them. Sit with this conversation, pray through it, and reach out to safe, wise support if needed. Pastor Ben closes us with a powerful prayer for all listeners walking this road.   RESOURCES   Episode on Betrayal Trauma On YouTube: https://youtu.be/C1e1ZWziB7E   Ted Roberts, Pure Desire:   Covenant Eyes:   YouTube Version: https:  //youtu.be/M6MGb3pMz4E       🔗 Connect with Redeemed Identity After Divorce WEBSITE: www.redeemed-identity.com LINK TREE: https://redeemed-identity.com/links/ SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/redeemidentity/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@redeemedidentity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/redeemedidentityafterdivorce/#   Amazon:   Healing After Divorce Paperback: https://a.co/d/8mjG6dp   Healing After Divorce ebook https://a.co/d/etcpVyR     WHERE CAN YOU FIND THE SHOW:   PODCAST:   APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/redeemed-identity-after-divorce-christian-divorce-encouragement/id1752761447   YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@RedeemedIdentityAfterDivorce