EPISODE · Jan 21, 2026 · 17 MIN
Episode 103 - How to ask for more at work (and what to do when the script falls apart)
from Career Espresso
How to ask for more at work (and what to do when the script falls apart)You've rehearsed this conversation a hundred times. You know exactly what you're going to say. And then your manager responds with something you didn't expect and suddenly your brain goes blank. The script you'd prepared just evaporates. You find yourself nodding along, saying "I understand" or worse, backing down entirely.This episode of Career Espresso is about how to actually ask for more when the conversation doesn't follow your plan. Not the theory of negotiation. The real work of staying grounded when things go sideways.What you'll discoverWhy most advice focuses entirely on preparation but misses what actually happens in the room when things go off-scriptThe specific ways women are conditioned to backpedal when conversations get uncomfortable (and why recognising this helps)What to say when you get hit with budget constraints, the praise pivot, or "I need to check with HR"Why this is rarely one conversation and how to follow up without feeling like you're being annoyingCommon patterns that keep women stuck: preparation as procrastination, the grateful trap, the "one shot" mentalityPerfect for leaders who've rehearsed these conversations but still find themselves accepting less than they came in asking for.Want more support with real-world leadership challenges? Head to How to Build a Leader on Substack for in-depth guides and scripts.Never miss an episode. Sign up for the weekly Espresso Brief email and get each episode with quick takeaways in your inbox.Get the full episode transcript Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
What this episode covers
How to ask for more at work (and what to do when the script falls apart)You've rehearsed this conversation a hundred times. You know exactly what you're going to say. And then your manager responds with something you didn't expect and suddenly your brain goes blank. The script you'd prepared just evaporates. You find yourself nodding along, saying "I understand" or worse, backing down entirely.This episode of Career Espresso is about how to actually ask for more when the conversation doesn't follow your plan. Not the theory of negotiation. The real work of staying grounded when things go sideways.What you'll discoverWhy most advice focuses entirely on preparation but misses what actually happens in the room when things go off-scriptThe specific ways women are conditioned to backpedal when conversations get uncomfortable (and why recognising this helps)What to say when you get hit with budget constraints, the praise pivot, or "I need to check with HR"Why this is rarely one conversation and how to follow up without feeling like you're being annoyingCommon patterns that keep women stuck: preparation as procrastination, the grateful trap, the "one shot" mentalityPerfect for leaders who've rehearsed these conversations but still find themselves accepting less than they came in asking for.Want more support with real-world leadership challenges? Head to How to Build a Leader on Substack for in-depth guides and scripts.Never miss an episode. Sign up for the weekly Espresso Brief email and get each episode with quick takeaways in your inbox.Get the full episode transcript Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Episode 103 - How to ask for more at work (and what to do when the script falls apart)
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