Rabbi Daniel Sher On Jewish Rituals, Collective Grief Post-10/7, And The Palisades Fire

In this episode, I am honored to sit down with my Rabbi and dear friend, Daniel Sher, from Kehillat Israel (KI) in the Pacific Palisades. Rabbi Sher has been a steadfast anchor for our congregation, even as he navigates his own "obliterated place" — having personally lost his family home and all their belongings in the devastating Palisades fire. We sit down to discuss the profound psychological genius embedded within Jewish mourning rituals, from the complete surrender of Shiva to the gradual re-entry of Shloshim. Rabbi Sher shares a beautiful framing of grief as a series of heavy items we carry forever in our pockets; we do not hold them out for the world to see at all times, but their weight permanently alters how we carry ourselves. We also talk about his perspective on rebuilding a community after a disaster with deep intentionality, choosing never to "waste our tragedies." Our conversation also turns to the complex, painful realities facing the Jewish people in the wake of October 7th. We explore the profound alienation of feeling iced out by former allies in social activist circles, the historical burden of being a "universally welcoming tradition forced to choose between safety and welcome," and the true definition of "chosenness"—not as a gold star of privilege, but as a sacred obligation to carry the weight of historical burden while fiercely choosing to see the light anyway.Connect with Rabbi Daniel Scherr: Kehillat Israel Podcasts Connect with Kaye Steinsapir: Subscribe on YouTubeInstagram: @teammollyofficial Substack: Transforming Pain Into PurposeThe Molly Steinsapir Foundation