Episode 23 - How to Stop Feeling Lonely - Even Around Others

Take a hop over to my Website and let me tell you about My Art Sisters:  https://realpositivechange.com Welcome to the Real Positive Change Podcast. I’m your host, Cathy Freeman, and this is a quiet space where art and wellness gently come together… A place where you can take a few minutes to breathe, reflect, and reconnect with your heart. Today, I want to talk about something that so many women experience… but don’t always have words for. Loneliness. Not just being alone… but that deeper feeling that can show up even when life looks full. And I want to begin with this thought: Loneliness is less about physical presence and more about emotional resonance—feeling that someone truly gets you.  That’s what I want to talk about t Because you can sit in a room full of people… family, friends, even those you love… …and still feel lonely if no one is connecting with your heart.     When we hear the word loneliness, we often picture someone physically alone. But that’s not always the reality. Loneliness is not the absence of people. It is the absence of feeling understood. It’s that quiet space inside where you might be: carrying thoughts you haven’t shared holding emotions you don’t know how to express or feeling like if you did share… it wouldn’t quite be received And so you stay quiet. Not because you want to… but because it feels easier than trying to explain something no one else seems to fully feel. That’s what makes loneliness so tender. It’s not loud. It’s not always obvious. It’s often a quiet ache that says: “I wish someone really understood me.”     This is something many women experience, especially caregivers, mothers, and those who are constantly giving to others. You can be: taking care of people showing up for everyone listening, helping, encouraging …and still feel like no one is really seeing you. Because being needed is not the same as being known. Let me say that again: Being needed is not the same as being known. You can be deeply loved… and still feel emotionally unseen. You can be surrounded… and still feel disconnected. Because what the heart longs for is not just interaction… It longs for resonance. That feeling when: you don’t have to explain everything someone understands the emotion behind your words you feel safe enough to just be yourself That is what we are really missing when we feel lonely.     There’s also something important happening beneath the surface. Loneliness isn’t just emotional—it’s physical. When we feel disconnected, the body can move into a subtle stress response. You might notice: feeling more tired than usual a sense of irritability emotional heaviness or even just feeling “off” without knowing why Sometimes the exhaustion we feel isn’t just from what we’re doing… …it’s from what we’re holding inside. Unspoken thoughts. Unexpressed feelings. Moments where we needed to be heard… but weren’t. And over time, that builds up. Not in a dramatic way… but in a quiet, steady way.     There’s another layer to this that many women carry. You are often the one who: notices what others need senses the emotions in the room helps keep things steady and peaceful You are the one who connects others. But who is connecting with you? This is where loneliness can quietly grow. Because when you are always the one giving emotional support… you may not always receive it in return. And not because others don’t care… …but because they may not realize what you’re carrying.     There’s another piece of loneliness that I think many of us don’t always recognize. Sometimes… we’re not just disconnected from people… we’re disconnected from the present moment. Because part of us is still living in the past. Looking back. Replaying. Remembering. And the “rearview mirror” of our life often holds: grief regret loss things we wish had been different moments we didn’t get closure from And when our thoughts stay there for too long… they begin to shape how we feel right now. Grief has a way of quietly whispering: “Something is missing.” And that feeling… can feel a lot like loneliness. Sometimes loneliness isn’t just about who is missing in our life… it’s about what we are still holding onto from our past.    CREATIVE REMINDERS This is one of the reasons I love the practice of Creative Reminders so much. It gently brings you back: back to this moment back to this breath back to this day When you sit down to create—even something small— you are no longer living in the past for those few minutes. You are here. And when you pair that with a simple, life-giving statement, something begins to shift. Examples might be: This is a new day. I am allowed to move forward. There is still good ahead of me. As you create around these words, your thoughts slowly move: from what was… to what is… to what can still be. “We don’t create our future by living in the rearview mirror… we create it by gently returning to the present.”     Sometimes the first step out of loneliness is not immediately finding someone else who understands… …but creating a space where you can hear your own heart again. When you: draw a simple line write a few honest words layer a piece of paper sit quietly and create You are doing something powerful. You are giving your feelings a place to go. And something begins to shift. The loneliness softens… not because everything is fixed… …but because you are no longer holding it all inside alone.   This is why I created My Art Sisters. It’s a space where women come together—not just to make art— but to experience emotional renewal through simple creative practice. Inside, I guide you step-by-step with: guided art projects journaling prompts Creative Reminders You’ll begin to: quiet your mind reconnect with yourself and create a gentle daily rhythm All in just 10–20 minutes a day. It’s not about adding more to your life… It’s about creating a small space within your life that gives back to you.   Now, I know some of you might be thinking… “That sounds nice… but I don’t have time.” “I’m not creative.” “I wouldn’t even know where to start.” Let me gently meet you there. You don’t need an hour. You don’t need special talent. You don’t need to “be artistic.” This is not about creating something perfect. It’s about creating something honest. Even 10–20 minutes… A few lines on a page… A simple piece of paper layered together… That is enough to begin. And sometimes we resist these small things… not because they don’t matter… but because we don’t yet realize how much we need them.   So if you’ve been feeling lonely… even in the middle of a full life… I want you to hear this: There is nothing wrong with you. Your heart is simply longing for resonance. For connection that feels real. For someone to truly understand. And sometimes… that begins with you. With a quiet moment. A simple page. A small act of creating. Because when your hands begin to move… your heart begins to feel less alone.