Episode 5: Communication, Boundaries & Agreements in ENM

Episode 5: Communication and Boundaries What does “good communication” really mean in ethical non-monogamy — and how do you know if you’re setting a boundary or just trying to control someone? Intro Paragraph:In this episode of The ENM DNM, we unpack the layered, often messy world of communication and boundaries in ethical non-monogamy. We explore how mismatched expectations, emotional triggers, people-pleasing, and different processing styles impact our relationships. You’ll hear real-life stories of things gone right (and wrong), how we define “good communication,” and what happens when boundaries are unclear or unspoken. Whether you’re new to ENM or years into your journey, this conversation is packed with honesty, reflection, and insight into what it takes to build trust and connection in non-monogamous relationships.What We Talk About:How we define “good communication” in ENM relationshipsWhy listening is the most underrated communication skillEmotional regulation and learning your own processing styleWhat a boundary actually is (and what it’s not)When communication isn’t enough and a relationship endsCommon challenges like unmet expectations and miscommunication between partners and metamoursThe difference between boundaries, agreements, and rulesLearning from past relationships and becoming “version 2.0”Mentioned in This Episode:ko-fi.com/enmdnm – Support the pod and join our private communityPolysecure (book)The E&M DNM Discord – connect, learn, and share in a supportive space (accessible via the Ko-Fi link)TED Talk: “John Francis: Walk the earth ... my 17-year vow of silence | TEDMiriam Margolyes Meets The Sistergirls Of The Tiwi Islands | Miriam Margolyes: Almost AustralianLove what you hear?Follow The ENM DNM on your favourite podcast app and leave us a review — it really helps new listeners find us.Support the pod and our work in the community at ko-fi.com/enmdnmJoin our private Discord space to connect, share, and grow alongside others in the ENM community.Next episode, we’re talking about dating stories — the good, the bad, and the fugly.Thanks for joining us in this honest conversation about ethical non-monogamy, queer identity, communication, and community. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making more gorgeous chaos?ou can support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here: Ko-fi.comYour support helps us make the podcast and also contributes to our broader mission of funding free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise be able to access it.Come say hi or follow along:InstagramTiktokEmail us!Want to book a counselling session with Adam?Get in touch here: HalaxyWe’re also keen to hear from potential collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners.Please note: this podcast is for conversation, reflection and shared experience. It is not a replacement for therapy, medical advice or crisis support.Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos?Support the podcast hereYour support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it.Come say hi: socialsWant to book a counselling session with Adam? HalaxyWe’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. [email protected] Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.