Episode 70 - Why Your Teen Pushes Back (And What to Do Instead) with Rachel Richards

What's at the heart of all good rules and boundaries in the home? If you've ever found yourself in a stand-off with your child over screens, curfews, or simply getting out the door on time, this episode is for you.  Boundaries are one of the most common – and most challenging – parts of parenting, especially as children move into the teenage years. In this episode, I'm joined by Rachel Richards, former BBC journalist and host of the Untangling Teenagers podcast. Rachel brings together science, lived experience, and deep curiosity about family life to help parents rethink how boundaries really work. Together, we explore a change in how we think about boundaries – from control and towards connection. Rachel explains why unconditional love and respect sit at the heart of effective boundaries and how teenagers interpret our words through a lens of status and respect, so what we intend as guidance can often be heard as judgement.  We talk about the importance of curiosity over judgement, and why asking "why?" opens up more meaningful conversations than jumping straight to consequences, especially when children push back or make mistakes. We also look at the difference between natural consequences and imposed punishments, and why the latter so often backfire in the heat of the moment. This is a thoughtful and reassuring conversation for any parent trying to find that balance between being understanding and holding firm boundaries, without losing the relationship along the way.