Episode 934: Dave and Kirty Zimmerman, Supporting Their Gay Son

My friends Dave and Kirty Zimmerman (married parents of four, active LDS, live in Utah County) join us to share their story of loving/supporting their gay son Dallin who came out at age 13 and is currently serving a mission. Highlights include: * Age 13: “Mom, What if I’m Gay?” * Dave, Kirty, and Dallin walking that road alone for three years without telling anyone. Very difficult road for all three. Positive and negative ward experiences. * Watching the “light go out” of Dallin—and how coming out helped everyone * Dallin (working closely with his parents but letting Dallin take the lead) coming out to family, friends, and his Ward family * Working closely with the Bishop and Ward Council to counsel together and how to best support Dallin—super helpful * Helpful Bishop and Stake President * No pressure for Dallin to serve a mission—yet Dallin chose this so he “could share God’s love with others” * In the celestial room together with Dallin sharing he will never be able to make the next temple covenant—knowing he won’t be able to make it work with a woman * Importance of support for LDS parents walking this road—and how the Ward family can make all the difference for their journey with the Church * Kirty: “Some of the best parts of Dallin are the parts that are gay” * Importance of letting LGBTQ people use the labels they prefer—and how telling people not to take on a label creates shame—and how that is inconsistent with other LDS groups This is one of the finest podcasts we’ve done on how to support a queer child (out in early teenage years) navigating that with friends, family, and church community. So insightful—and helps all of us consider what we can do to support closeted families in our circle of influence. Also, one of the finest podcasts to help us better understand, support, and love a younger queer Latter-day Saint. Thank you, Dave and Kirty, for being on the podcast and sharing your family story. Thanks for your courage to do this. You are helping create Zion. Much love and respect to the Zimmerman family. Thank you Elder Dallin Zimmerman for allowing your parents to share your story. I feel you are concurrently serving two missions—your mission in South American and your mission with your powerful story being shared—both to help everyone know God loves them. ** Note: Dave and Kirty with be part of a parent breakout session at Gather (Nov 12-14 in Provo, Utah). See show notes for more information and how to register ** Links: Instagram @dave_zman: https://www.instagram.com/dave_zman Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Dizzi45Z Instagram @kirtyz: https://www.instagram.com/kirtyz Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kirtyz Gather Conference Nov 12-14: https://www.liftandlove.org/gather Faith Matters Episode: https://www.faithmatters.org/p/when-your-child-comes-out-as-gay