FA 108 Toxic Popularity

On this week’s show we open with a discussion of the sexualization of animals, and the various forms such sexualization can take (zoophilia, bestiality, zoosadism). Guest host Klik Wolf joins us to discuss our main topic, toxic popularity — we talk about how the desire to become popular can turn some well-meaning furs into people they don’t want to be. We close with advice about becoming more dominant in bed.Viro: Welcome back to Feral Attraction! Joining me as a guest host this week is Klik Wolf. Klik, why don’t you take a moment to introduce yourself?Klik: Hello, I'm klik Wolf. I'm an aspiring indie game dev and adult performer and I've been in the furry fandom for over 8 years but have just recently started getting involved in the community.Introduction topicWhat forms can sexualization of animals take?ZoophiliaTaking a sexual interest in animalsFantasizing about animals or animal parts in a sexual wayMay include feral art / roleplayBestialityHaving sexual contact with an animalZoosadismTorturing an animal for the purpose of sexual gratificationWhat are the ethics of having a sexual interest in animals?Should we be tolerant of non-offending zoophiles?What are the ethics of thought crimes?What is the legality?Sexual contact with animals is illegal in many jurisdictions, including most of the United StatesHawaii, Kentucky, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Vermont, West Virginia and Wyoming are the only states that lack explicit anti-bestiality lawsToxic PopularityWhat is the purpose of fandom?The furry fandom was created to be a place where anyone could be accepted and supported, a fandom where people could forget about shallow ideas like popularity and enjoy the company of others without worrying about social pretenses. Unfortunately, many furs don't feel like this is the case.How does popularity in the fandom actually work?What tends to get social media attentionOften, things that are quite impersonalPositivityMemesRelatable sentimentsFursuit picsHumor/PunsSmutPornWhat tends to make people avoid youOften, things that are quite personalDramaNegativityContrarianism(unless you’re popular specifically for being a troll)NeedinessDesperationAwkwardnessInappropriatenessCliquesMany groups of friends in the fandom are essentially by invitation onlyIt can be frustrating to attempt to befriend someone who is part of a cliqueThe value of a clique lies in there being an “outgroup” of people who supposedly “aren’t worthy” of being inYou do not need to internalize the message that you “aren’t worthy” just because a particular clique seems closed off to youWhat are the downsides of popularity?HatersSome people will be envious of you and will take a dislike to you, or even work to sabotage youExtra scrutinyLots of eyes and ears on you means people notice your mistakes (microaggressions, moments of weakness/anger, etc.)Tone policingCan feel like you need to wear a mask, not be “human”PrejudicePeople who know you by reputation can form first impressions of you without you ever actually meeting themCan create a sense of paranoiaEmotional bandwidthFan interactions / fan service can become extremely draining and allow little time/energy for personal/intimate relationshipsHow do you want to show up in the fandom?Why do you want to be popular?Attention?Sexual partner selection?Influence?Legacy?Power?What would popularity actually bring you?Weigh pros/consHow much of your “true self” are you willing to lose?How can you show up in a likable but authentic way?How else can you create the emotions you’re after?Who do you really want to be well liked by?Feedback“I just found your podcasts the other day through Culturally F’d. You guys do a wonderful service for humanity and the anthro community. Life’s been fucking dark so I look forward to the new episodes and I’m speechless for how this fandom is matured. Without a doubt, thank you for everything you do, seriously. In just about 6 months I returned to being a furry after like 10 years, and everywhere I look I see so much to fucking love in this community. Especially resistance regaining ground against empire. Seems so unreal.” - DaisyQuestion(s)What is the first step to going from being a submissive to becoming a dominant in bed? After five years, my boyfriend wants to have me dominate and take control. I’m a little nervous and really unsure of how to start to ease into the role without becoming overwhelmed.Received via Contact Form (name withheld)FA 023 BDSM Roles Demystified: https://www.feralattraction.com/shownotes/fa023Learning to be more dominant in bed advice column:https://www.feralattraction.com/advice/learning-to-be-more-dominant-in-bedCloserContact infoContact Viro:Telegram: t.me/viroscicollieTwitter: twitter.com/viroscicollieContact Klik:Telegram: t.me/Klik2097Twitter: https://twitter.com/klik2097 (warning: 18+ NSFW)Feral Attraction Twitter:twitter.com/feralattractfmFeral Attraction Contact Page:feralattraction.com/contactCoaching Services now available!As our audience has grown, many of our listeners and advice column readers have asked to speak with Viro in a one-on-one setting so as to get help with resolving relationship issues or overcoming stumbling blocks that can trip us up on life's journey. Until now, it was not possible to offer such one-on-one attention, simply because of time constraints. Fortunately, Viro is now offering this kind of individualized attention as a service!For more information, visit: feralattraction.com/coachingOther businessPatreonJoel Kreissman is a published author of anthropomorphic science-fiction in his Para-Imperium universe. His first novel, The Pride of Parahumans, was published with Thurston Howl publications in 2017 and he has more free stories on his blog at https://paraimperium.wordpress.com/