From Power Struggles to Connection: Parenting and Attachment with IFS + The Neufeld Approach

What if the key to raising emotionally healthy, resilient kids isn’t controlling behavior—but deepening connection?In this episode of Self-Led Love, Bahia Miller is joined by parent coach and IFS practitioner Lisa Winer to explore a powerful blend of Internal Family Systems (IFS) and the Neufeld relational developmental approach. Together, they unpack how attachment, emotional safety, and understanding your own “parts” transform the way you parent—and partner.You’ll learn why behavior is never the real problem, how to work with your reactive parts, and what your child actually needs to thrive. This is especially powerful for parents navigating toddlers, big emotions, screen time, and different parenting styles in relationships.✨ Inside this episode: Why attachment—not behavior—is the foundation of development  How to work with the part of you that “loses it”  What “counterwill” is (and why your kid resists)  A nuanced take on screen time + emotional health Why play (even aggressive play) supports development  Navigating different parenting styles in partnershipThis episode will shift how you see your child—and yourself. Whether you’re parenting a toddler, teen, or your own inner child, this is a must-listen.🎧 Tune in to lead your family from Self.Connect with Lisa Winer: Website: https://www.lisaweiner.coach/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisaweiner.parentcoach Neufeld Institute: https://www.neufeldinstitute.org/Resources:Hold On to Your Kids – Gordon Neufeld & Gabor Maté If this resonated, share it with a parent who needs this reminder: connection comes first 💛✨ Follow on IG: @bahiamiller🌈 Free resources + more from Bahia:Bahia’s Unblending Meditation: https://bahiamiller.com/unblendThe Self-Led Love Checklist: https://bahiamiller.com/checklistwww.bahiamiller.com🔮 For couples who are committed to growth and ready to build real emotional intelligence together using IFS — the Self Led Love Lab waitlist is open: https://bahiamiller.com/waitlistWant to go deeper into the work?🎧 For our podcast community:Join the Repair for Relationship Resilience Workshop for $22Use code PODCASThttps://bahiamiller.com/repair-workshop*Self-Led Love Podcast Disclaimer*Self-Led Love is a space for reflection, education, and relational growth. The content shared here is offered for educational and informational purposes only, and reflects my lived experience and professional perspective as an Internal Family Systems–informed relationship coach.Any stories shared on the podcast are either my own, anonymized, or composite examples drawn from real experiences. Identifying details have been changed to protect privacy and confidentiality.This podcast is not a substitute for therapy, medical care, legal advice, or mental health treatment. While many listeners may find resonance, insight, or support through this...