Funfiltered Episode #055 - "The Oink Chromosome"

Sam "speaking". Fine. I will acknowledge you, you tormenting tusker, since you so rudely refuse to loaf elsewhere. Don’t look at me with those big Dumbo eyes, it inseminates unbearable shame! And yes, readers, you’re welcome for the provision of “Dumbo” and “inseminates” in the same sentence. Your childhood be cussed, those scavenging bastards out there in Twitterville have been gorging on that corpse for yonks. The release schedule for this podcast has variously been a week, two weeks, a month… A recent glance at the Funfiltered playlist (which, you know, IS THERE) revealed that we have fallen into a bimonthly cycle. The bad kind of “bimonthly”. That is, unless you abhor our bursting guts. Scarcely a fantastical notion. Not exactly a Frank Herbert-y conceptual confection that, is it? Yeah, we review Dune. Why did it take an arbitrary glance to see just how far this particular pair of Icaruses (Icari? - I suppose clarity has never been sought) has plummeted? Scratch that, I can’t justly ascribe excessive ambition to the two of us kinda-people-shaped taters. We-- no, I’ll speak for myself because Jordan edits the episodes and stuff and I don’t want to kick a man when he’s down. And it’s so very down. I took my eye off the ball (forgive the Americanism). Life got in the way (forgive the bullshit). Since Day 1, we have faced numerous, novel and, frankly, testament-to-a-very-real-but-hateful-deity-scale technical issues. In the bog we have been bogged. We are a meek outfit. We are unmoneyed. All we have are our stupid voices and our stupid "voices" - you need to imagine the second one in a tone of mockery generated by insecurity. None of the above is intended to excuse (although, actually... yeah, WHY NOT?! Is it inadequate for you, oh commandant?!). It's just to say that a reliable timetable is hard to enforce. You don't listen. But if you do, we-- no, I'll speak for myself because Jordan is a remorseless ox that would kill you as soon as ponder you and stuff. If you do listen, I apologise. This SHOULDN'T be the final ep of the year. But if it is, consider betterment a resolution for '22. I'm just joking, Jord. Don't murder me, ya maniac.