GAG A MAGA! Down N' Dirty Details Of The Most Recent Trump Gag Order

Trump not allowed to speak about court case at rallies, as the average member of the crowd has no knowledge of courtroom dynamics beyond what they've seen on reruns of The People's Court. No statements that could incite violence, unless he's speaking to a crowd of followers at a backyard amateur wrestling tournament. No more mentions of a "witch hunt", as many Trump followers believe in actual witches, and the continued repetition of the phrase really frightens them. Trump allowed to encourage harm to political rivals / judges who reside in major metropolitan areas, as his followers more than likely won't have the gas money to drive cross country and respond to said threats. Trump not allowed to advocate for book burning, particularly when all of the books he's thinking of are written by former colleagues. Trump allowed to continue to scowl in courtroom, as it turns out the source is simply a bad case of diaper rash. No having McDonald's delivered to the courtroom, as the damage done to the plumbing was so extensive that local taxpayers will be burdened for the foreseeable future. Eric Trump court ordered to please stop burying his father in the magical pet cemetery.