God Has All The Credit Scores

We’re all doing our best to live our lives as well as we canAnd that means something different to each of usBut certain things are universalThat smile in your heart when you truly feel seen and enjoyedThe lifting of your cheeks when you make someone giggleThe expansion of your being when you witness a stunning moment in natureIn the structures of cultureMoney often equals successA life well livedBut as infinite documentaries have shown usThat’s not necessarily trueMoney does not immunize us from hardshipThough no money is a pervasive hardship in itselfSo, we do our best at what’s before usStrive for what we desireSometimes succeedSometimes failBut let’s not forgetEverything is holyEvery struggle is holyEvery success is holyEvery being is holyEvery item is holyThere is nothing in creation that isn’t holyBecause it’s exactly the wholeness of everything that’s holyWe can ignore or deny that holiness, wholeness, connectionAnd that’s where trouble startsTrying to amplify holiness is equally problematicOne thing being holier than another is just not possibleOf course, recognition of holiness varies tremendouslyAnd that comes down to ways of seeing, orientationAnd there is a big philosophical discussion here I’d love to haveBut for now, the point is: God is All Of It, and thus in all of itSlowing down and looking people in the eyes reveals the light of divinityEach person, a specific flavor and texture and shineThe constant striving, the hungry ghostCan’t see itNothing is meaningful but the expressions of the chosen idealAnd attaining its markersIt’s safe to say that I have failed in achieving some key markers of successBut in doing so, I am touching into deep richnessI’m not particularly enjoying itBut I can’t deny there’s something tender and true I’m accessingAnd it’s shaping meI started studying attunement and coherenceSo I could be a positive influence in the worldAnd boy, am I grateful I had that drive to beginBecause it’s serving me and it’s exactly what I needIf I were starting today, in my time of needI wouldn’t have this depth of practice to support meIn hoping to bless the macro, I am living the blessing in the microIt’s also making me very sensitiveTo the many habits and mindsets of hustle culture I still employThough I have set down an enormous loadI still fear my bank balance is a reflection of my worthEven though I can look at someone else in dire straitsAnd know that’s not true for themTomorrow I have an interview for a $18/hr job, and I really need itOf course, I’d love to land in a well-paying roleBut, I’m happy to step into a role that requires my skills and capacities, however humbleI’m reminded of the manifesting practice of writing million dollar checks to yourselfA practice that always made me laughBecause, yes, lightening does strike from time to timeBut I believe more commonlyGod works in small, unmarked bills This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fallingtenderly.substack.com