Gonarch's Lair episode 51: The Church of Skynet

We need your clout, your booze and your motivation as it’s time to resist with the remorseless rebels, to reveal whether they’ll fight for the future or surrender to their destiny in our long-awaited Terminator special; to celebrate 35 years since the birth of the genre-defining franchise, and as a memento for our canny little Cybercrabs, we have dedicated an entire episode to one of science fiction’s most iconic characters. To start this problematic prowl we present a rapid newsflash covering the Resident Evil 3 remake, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Xbox Series X and PS5, Netflix’s The Witcher, Devil May Cry 5, IndyRef2, Cyberpunk 2077 delays, Jojo Rabbit, James Acaster’s Classic Scrapes, Munchkin, the Brinkburn Street Brewery NERD Arcade event and soft-close toilet seats; we discuss our recent rediscovery of board games, there is a short but sensational Sensi Soaks update and we assist the machines with their extinction of mankind. Before we say hasta la vista to the first part of this doomed expedition, the pitiless partnership pop round to Lair 2.0 for this month’s Gonarch’s Player where we play three topical games on the Sega Mega Drive: The Terminator, Terminator 2 and RoboCop Versus The Terminator. The divisive dickwads also talk about WALL-E and Short Circuit, The Art of War, Dan Dare, baby food, Charlie Brown, battle fatigue, Spandau Ballet and robotic beards; we announce the winner of the Rings Community Challenge and award them with a relevant nickname, have a mini Thom’s Complaints segment and we denounce Big Momma’s endurance. 40-watt ranges include Ross treating himself and Thom moving to Scotland.