Harvesting mania in retrospect in order to get an alignment with one's vision

part of this is I need new ways I don't have many people in my life who see things this way or a similar way and so this is a call out for ways to create ricos one of the first things I'm going to do when I start actually embodying my mania again is practicing random acts of kindness for to our time chunks approximately I don't know if I covered this bit I have this bunch of writing and I don't know if I covered this so I'm going to go quickly but I was thinking maplin mania and psychosis land is kind of like feedback it's sort of like the missteps along the way and then having to retrace one steps and sort of having experiences of old memories and new perceptions mixed together so it's almost in a way by doing that it's a way to integrate the past to catch up with the present i think we experienced such extreme states because maybe we're even clearing our our light body are mine screen or perceptual apparatus of all those accumulated bits of dust of the ego that we've recorded over time and even if it's not even if it's not getting rid of them as at least making us aware that they're there and and in that way we can perhaps act in different ways instead of being instead of acting in unconscious ways and we don't know why we're acting that way sort of gives us an idea of why we're acting that way and I do think the collective unconscious comes in here as well so there's some personal karma that's resolved as well as collective unconscious karma and this is all just conceptual it's not necessarily true it's just an interesting way to think about it i'm just playing with words it's almost like an attempt to get congruent or jumping through hoops to get congruent and i don't think it can be fully done in the process mania and that's where harvesting comes in in retrospect in order to get an alignment with one's vision we realize that we're sort of off track as a human being and being on the eco track is always being off track and there's no such thing as one track there's so many different tracks and it's up for us to be explorers of that and not just stay on our single ego safe track that we think is safety but really it leads to isolation and increases the potential of developing a so-called mental illness and I wrote down I think that when somebody's talking about their personal goals they're actually talking about their mental illness because unless it's an alignment with the universe it's not good and the manic energy of the universe comes in and opens up our vision we can see so much and then the myopic view of professionals and so-called normal people actually collapse that huge vision into a small narrow band of illness mania is like stepping outside one's personal history and it's a blank slate and in a way I wanted to mania after experiencing some distressful things and it was maybe a way to almost save me from that because had I kept going in that terrified state I don't know what would have happened to me and I was thinking about how the trans consciousness experience is sort of like having access to new perceptions new insights new means but also having access to one's ego which is ones old way of relating in order to relate to the collective society that's still out there we do need both and I take medication too I think maintain that dual awareness in April when I was in the psych ward they try to put me on a lot of seroquel and I did not want that and so I'm not on it I'm just on a bit of lithium and I'm able to still learn and live and and have an enjoyable life if I was on the other medication I wouldn't feel like that and i would feel pretty miserable how do we design Society for manic flow I wrote down here the thinker is the thought and this is something that J Krishnamurti talks about a lot and I never really got it until I heard somebody say that here is the speaker so the one in the mind that's listening to the thought happening is the same as the thought it's the same energy and process so it's divided