Healing After Divorce: Nervous System Reset & Self-Trust

from Pulling Threads, Weaving Authenticity · host Leslie Mathews

Healing after divorce starts in the body — not the spreadsheet. In this conversation, crisis coach Pamela Dussault joins Leslie Mathews to share why nervous system reset has to come before any of the practical work, and how women rebuild self-trust after an abusive marriage, burnout, or estrangement. ▶ Ready for structured support through divorce? Learn about THROUGH, Leslie's 8-week coaching program: https://theloomlife.com/throughdivorceprogram ▶ Book a free discovery call with Pamela: https://pamela-dussault-consulting.com —————————————— In this episode of Pulling Threads, Pamela Dussault — a coach with more than 23 years of experience guiding women through divorce, burnout, estrangement, and existential reckoning — walks us through her signature framework she calls "victory." Pamela's path began with her own series of storms, including a divorce from an abusive partner who threatened her life when she sought to leave. From that breaking point, she built a methodology that moves clients through three anchors: resetting the nervous system, disrupting the identity and belief patterns that no longer serve them, and rebuilding self-trust so they can emerge as the most authentic version of themselves. Leslie and Pamela talk candidly about the moment of awakening that comes inside crisis — when you finally see that the wall in front of you is actually a new beginning. They explore what it feels like to choose change, why acceptance is the hardest and most empowering step, and how something as small as the "butterfly tap" under the collarbone can move you out of fear and back into your body's wisdom. Pamela also shares her own story of setting new standards for love after divorce, and why it took her four years to find a relationship that matched what she actually wanted. If you're in the middle of your own storm — divorce, burnout, an estrangement, or that quiet existential question of "is this really my life?" — this episode is a gentle, grounded reminder that change isn't happening to you. It's happening for you. WHAT WE COVER: • Why nervous system reset has to come before the legal, financial, and parenting decisions • The "butterfly" technique and a hand-on-heart practice you can use today • How to spot the belief patterns keeping you in a life that doesn't fit anymore • Pamela's three-pillar framework: reset, disrupt, rebuild • Setting new standards for love (and why this isn't about finding a partner) • Holding both connection and distance in estrangement • The Disneyland moment when joy comes back — and what to do with it TIMESTAMP 00:00 Welcome & introducing Pamela Dussault 01:30 The one thing your younger self would be surprised by 04:00 'I need to know this for a reason' — the wounded healer's path 06:00 Leslie's newspaper-article moment & deciding to leave 10:30 Pamela's 3am awakening & the gentle voice that changed everything 14:00 The mind-body downloads after the spiritual opening 18:00 The black-mold sign and trusting the universe 20:30 What the reframe to hope actually looks like inside the pain 23:30 Joy returning after suffering: the Disneyland story 25:00 The first choice — acceptance is the hardest, most powerful move 26:30 Why nervous system reset is the first pillar (not finances) 29:00 Two practices: the butterfly tap & hand-on-heart 31:30 Disrupting belief patterns: what story are you living in? 34:30 Social media, constant fear, and the noise we absorb 38:00 Burnout, career change, and the courage to stop 40:30 Setting new standards for love after an abusive marriage 43:30 Looking for the relationship — not the person 45:30 How long it took, why she wasn't nervous, and what she refused to settle for 48:30 When overwhelm is real and when it's a signal 51:30 Pamela's three-pillar method: reset, disrupt, rebuild 54:00 Estrangement: how to love from a distance 57:00 The Pisces symbol — holding both wholeness and connection 01:02:30 How to work with Pamela: discovery calls & the Victory package 01:04:30 Closing reflections CONNECT WITH PAMELA DUSSAULT: • Website & free discovery call: https://pamela-dussault-consulting.com • Instagram & Threads: @pamela.dussault.consulting • All her links: https://linktr.ee/CrisisCoachPamela • Free burnout quiz: https://shorturl.at/8igxA CONNECT WITH LESLIE & THE LOOM LIFE: • THROUGH — 8-week divorce program: https://theloomlife.com/throughdivorceprogram • Main hub: https://theloomlife.com • Therapy practice: https://loomlifetherapy.com • Leslie's site: https://leslieellenmathews.com • Instagram: @the.loom.life • TikTok: @leslieellenmathews ▶ SUBSCRIBE for weekly conversations on divorce recovery, nervous system healing, and authentic living. ▶ If this episode helped, leave a rating or review — it's the single best way to help another woman find this work. #DivorceRecoveryPodcast #NervousSystemReset #HealingAfterDivorce #PullingThreads #TheLoomLife

What this episode covers

Healing after divorce starts in the body — not the spreadsheet. In this conversation, crisis coach Pamela Dussault joins Leslie Mathews to share why nervous system reset has to come before any of the practical work, and how women rebuild self-trust after an abusive marriage, burnout, or estrangement.▶ Ready for structured support through divorce? Learn about THROUGH, Leslie's 8-week coaching program: https://theloomlife.com/throughdivorceprogram▶ Book a free discovery call with Pamela: https://pamela-dussault-consulting.com——————————————In this episode of Pulling Threads, Pamela Dussault — a coach with more than 23 years of experience guiding women through divorce, burnout, estrangement, and existential reckoning — walks us through her signature framework she calls "victory." Pamela's path began with her own series of storms, including a divorce from an abusive partner who threatened her life when she sought to leave. From that breaking point, she built a methodology that moves clients through three anchors: resetting the nervous system, disrupting the identity and belief patterns that no longer serve them, and rebuilding self-trust so they can emerge as the most authentic version of themselves.Leslie and Pamela talk candidly about the moment of awakening that comes inside crisis — when you finally see that the wall in front of you is actually a new beginning. They explore what it feels like to choose change, why acceptance is the hardest and most empowering step, and how something as small as the "butterfly tap" under the collarbone can move you out of fear and back into your body's wisdom. Pamela also shares her own story of setting new standards for love after divorce, and why it took her four years to find a relationship that matched what she actually wanted.If you're in the middle of your own storm — divorce, burnout, an estrangement, or that quiet existential question of "is this really my life?" — this episode is a gentle, grounded reminder that change isn't happening to you. It's happening for you.WHAT WE COVER:• Why nervous system reset has to come before the legal, financial, and parenting decisions• The "butterfly" technique and a hand-on-heart practice you can use today• How to spot the belief patterns keeping you in a life that doesn't fit anymore• Pamela's three-pillar framework: reset, disrupt, rebuild• Setting new standards for love (and why this isn't about finding a partner)• Holding both connection and distance in estrangement• The Disneyland moment when joy comes back — and what to do with itTIMESTAMP00:00 Welcome & introducing Pamela Dussault01:30 The one thing your younger self would be surprised by04:00 'I need to know this for a reason' — the wounded healer's path06:00 Leslie's newspaper-article moment & deciding to leave10:30 Pamela's 3am awakening & the gentle voice that changed everything14:00 The mind-body downloads after the spiritual opening18:00 The black-mold sign and trusting the universe20:30 What the reframe to hope actually looks like inside the pain23:30 Joy returning after suffering: the Disneyland story25:00 The first choice — acceptance is the hardest, most powerful move26:30 Why nervous system reset is the first pillar (not finances)29:00 Two practices: the butterfly tap & hand-on-heart31:30 Disrupting belief patterns: what story are you living in?34:30 Social media, constant fear, and the noise we absorb38:00 Burnout, career change, and the courage to stop40:30 Setting new standards for love after an abusive marriage43:30 Looking for the relationship — not the person45:30 How long it took, why she wasn't nervous, and what she refused to settle for48:30 When overwhelm is real and when it's a signal51:30 Pamela's three-pillar method: reset, disrupt, rebuild54:00 Estrangement: how to love from a distance57:00 The Pisces symbol — holding both wholeness and connection01:02:30 How to work with Pamela: discovery calls & the Victory package01:04:30 Closing refle

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This episode was published on May 19, 2026.

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