Healing from Grief: Insights and Strategies for Entrepreneurs

What does it mean to truly embrace grief and navigate its tumultuous waves? Join us as we explore strategies that entrepreneurs can use to heal from grief with Sheila Clemenson, transition coach and author of "Over the Rainbow: From the Depths of Grief to Hope." Show Notes | Transcript "Moving forward through grief is a journey of discovery. It's discovering who you are in your new state of being." - Sheila Clemenson Sheila Clemenson is a seasoned transition coach and best-selling author who discovered how to create a sanctuary for those facing difficult situations, guiding them to grow and move forward. Sheila knows the pain of grief all too well, losing her father to suicide and her first husband to ALS. Together, we unravel the complex tapestry of emotions that grief encompasses—sadness, anger, anticipatory grief—and how to coexist with these feelings rather than attempting to conquer them. Sheila’s insights reveal that grief extends beyond the death of loved ones and that it can also stem from significant life changes, such as the end of a relationship or losing a job. In this episode, you will learn: The multifaceted nature of grief and how emotions manifest and evolve Strategies for managing grief constructively Methods for maintaining emotional and physical boundaries The value of resources like meditation apps and energy medicine How society's discomfort with grief leaves individuals isolated How to handle hurtful comments and toxic positivity The importance of supportive management in the workplace Resources: Join the Soulful Women's Network Connect with Sheila: Book Website: sheilaclemenson.com Website: transitionscoachingservices.com Connect with Gloria "Grace" at Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Gloria "Grace" Rand: Namaste. Grief is something that we all experience in life, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's easy to get through. But today's guest has quite literally written a book on the subject to help you traverse this journey with compassion and courage. But before I bring her on, I'd like to welcome those of you who may be new to Live, Love, Engage. I am Gloria Grace, and I help female entrepreneurs attract more clients with calm, clarity, and confidence by helping them to release negative thought patterns like self-doubt and poor self-worth. And joining us today in just a moment is Sheila Clemonson. She is a seasoned transition coach and author of the book Over the Rainbow, From the Depths of Grief to Hope. And Sheila knows the pain of grief all too well, losing her first husband at a young age to ALS. But through her own journey, she discovered how to create a sanctuary for those facing difficult situations, guiding them to grow and move forward. So without further ado, I'm going to bring her on so we can talk about this subject and how we can get through it with compassion. So here we go. Welcome, Sheila, to Live, Love, Engage. Sheila Clemenson: Hi, Grace. It's wonderful to be here today. Thank you so much for having me on. Gloria "Grace" Rand: Well, I appreciate having people like you on to talk about these things because we don't always talk about it, and yet it is something that we go through. I mean, it's inevitable. You know, what is it they say? The only two sure things in life are death and taxes. And, of course, grief isn't always just about death as well. I mean, sometimes that, you know, there's all kinds of different pauses that we can have. Death of a relationship or something going on with our with a job, you know, if we lose a position. So, let's talk a little bit, I thought we might start off with kind of talking about some of the complex emotions that come up when someone experiences a loss. Because I know I've had not just necessarily the inevitable sadness comes up, there's been other things too. So, I wonder if you can shed some light on that for us. Sheila Clemenson: Yeah, so essentially, you know, I call myself a professional griever. And I know that it sounds kind of crazy, but when I look at my life and my grief experiences, they did start at a young age. I lost my father to suicide when I was five years old. And I did not know it was suicide at the time. I wasn't told that. I was told he was in a car accident by my mom because she probably didn't think a five-year-old, of course, was going to understand something like that. But, you know, not having a dad from five years old on, you know, my life was living in that very shadow. And so where I kind of go with that is that loss was profound from a young age and All of the emotions that go with that just became very familiar to me. And then moving forward through my journey, you know, loss of relationships, loss of innocence. There's some of that in my story about some sexual abuse I had when I was younger. loss then of my first husband, Grant, and that is the incredible journey that I've written about in the Over the Rainbow book. You know, grief has become a companion for me, and I want to say that it's not comfortable, but you learn how to live with it, I think is the best way to say that. I don't care how long It's been since someone has died that you have cared about that it has been important in your life You are still experiencing that over time. I met with a woman yesterday She her husband died 30 years ago and she's like we never really get over it and I'm like no we'd never get over and so I think the emotions that creep in at any given time are we're learning how to live with them and manage them. Sometimes there's deep sadness, sometimes that's tied to anniversaries or special days that you had together. Mother's Day and Father's Day that recently came up can certainly trigger a lot of things. And then there's an anticipatory grief that I don't think we talk about very much, Grace, that is when we've lost people or things, before we've lost them. And that can be relationships that aren't going the way we want them to. It can look like a lot of different things. So grief is pretty extensive. It's not just to the death of somebody that we love dearly. It's so much more than that. Gloria "Grace" Rand: Yeah, I can understand that and relate to that, and I do know the significance of, like, different anniversaries or, you know, significant dates that come up. But I want to ask you about this because I know for me, especially when I lost my…my brother died in his sleep at age 33 when I was, like, 17 years old. And not only did I have the sadness, but I also had a lot of anger, you know. you know, at a young age, you know, just, you know, really being, you know, it's like, how could you do this to mom? Especially, he died on Mother's Day of all days. You know, it's like, oh my gosh. And I can, you know, only imagine, you know, God forbids. That's just not. Yeah, what happened to me. But I, you know, because it was a double whammy and her firstborn and everything. So, yeah, can you talk about that? You know, how does, you know, how do you deal with some of that, you know, anger that comes up? Sheila Clemenson: Anger is... I have to tell you, it's one of those emotions that I try to stay away from. And it's not comfortable for me. I'm a people pleaser. I want to make everybody happy. I'm a peacemaker. I want to take it all on and not let anybody see that anger. However, that anger shows up in different ways for different people, right? It could be being passive aggressive. It could be, I'm fine. And we know what fine means. I define it in my book. And that's effed up, insecure, neurotic and emotional. I think that sometimes we internalize that and get resentful, which is probably more of what I did. I tried to show up as the best person that I could for my husband, Grant, when I was his caregiver. But we were on that journey for four and a half years. And there was a lot of anger in our journey, our connection with what was happening. And I want to say, unfortunately, verbally, we took it out on one another. And I'm not proud of that. But I think it's important for people to know that I talk about that in my book because it is a very real aspect of who we are. Some might say it's a shadow side of who we are, right? Living in that anger and that resentment. But I want to say that also, sometimes we take that out on those we love the most because we're pretty confident they're not going to leave. And so my husband Grant and I, we went through that a lot together and that was really challenging. And from a spiritual place, I have a really great story about connecting with the medium in the book where I asked the medium, you know, can Grant forgive me for the things that happened that we didn't really want to go through, right? And she said, there's nothing to forget. You were living in a human experience, and your spiritual selves and your souls don't need that. And she also brought Grant in, and there's some really cool stories to that. But I say that because sometimes we need that validation in some way. And I was still holding on to that guilt and shame from those angry outbursts and those really human situations. And I think that I needed to do what I needed to do to try to work through that guilt and that shame. And I did a lot of healing work on myself and especially with some spiritual connections. So I just put that in my book too. Gloria "Grace" Rand: Yeah, I appreciate that and I can relate to that because I know I was a sort of part-time caregiver for my sister while she was going through her cancer journey. And yeah, and there were some times where, you know, certainly she lashed out, which was understandable because she's in pain, but sometimes I was just like, you know, I'm doing the best I can here. You know,...