Design Your Life, Your Way - Empowering Women Over 50 to Live Life On Purpose

Does this sound familiar? You’ve done everything “right” and still feel like you’re holding yourself back. Today’s guest wants you to know that after 50, it’s time to stop playing small and consider that the boldest chapter of your life isn’t behind you. Rather, it’s waiting on the other side of a single courageous step. Audley Stephnson built his entire philosophy around one word: audacious. From an unexpected internship that led nowhere, to becoming the commissioner of a Canadian basketball league, to launching a podcast that grew to 600+ episodes, Audley’s journey is a masterclass in what becomes possible when you stop waiting for permission. In our conversation, we talk about how to recognize the thread of courage that’s been running through your own life all along, how to challenge the beliefs that no longer serve you, and how sharing your messy, imperfect, real story can be the very thing that gives someone else permission to begin. In this episode, you’ll discover: What “audacious” actually means and why it’s self-defined, not one-size-fits-all (this reframe alone might change everything for you). How to spot the red thread of courage that’s already running through your life, even if you haven’t recognized it yet. A powerful tool for challenging the beliefs that once served you but are quietly keeping you stuck in patterns you’ve outgrown. Audley’s BOLD Framework — four principles for outlasting adversity, living your truth, and choosing growth even when life is hard. Why sharing your story — not a polished, finished version, but the real one — is one of the most powerful gifts you can give another woman. How we are all “undefeated” by our hardest moments — and how that reframe can shift everything when you’re in the middle of a valley. If you’ve been sitting on a dream or a pivot, this episode will remind you that you’re already more audacious than you think. About My Guest Audley Stephenson is the host of the Audacious Living Podcast, with over 600 episodes dedicated to helping people live life boldly through real conversations and purposeful action. He’s also the author of Living Your Best Audacious Life Ever: How Unleashing Your Inner Greatness Can Change the World. From his early days as a sports podcaster with media credentials in NBA locker rooms, to serving as commissioner of a Canadian basketball league, Audley’s life is a living example of what happens when you say yes before you feel ready. He lives and breathes the philosophy that audacity — in whatever form it takes for you — is always worth it. Connect with Audley: Website: bestaudaciouslife.com Podcast: Audacious Living Podcast Book: Living Your Best Audacious Life Ever (coming Fall 2026) Resources & links mentioned: The BOLD Framework: Better than yesterday | Outlast adversity | Live your truth | Disrupt the norm Gloria’s L.O.V.E. Method: Let go and let God | Open your heart to receive | Value your uniqueness | Embrace your divinity Podfest — the podcasting conference where Gloria and Audley first met Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace at gloriarand.com Take my Personal Power Archetype quiz to help you identify your strengths for designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s ready to take a bold step but needs a little permission. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, courage, and living on purpose.

Are you feeling a lack of connection or community in this season of life? The women over 50 who are most alive have one thing in common, and it’s not a morning routine or a business strategy. It’s each other. In this edition of Design Your Life, Your Way, I dive into the essential need for deep, authentic connection for women in midlife. This solo episode is for the woman who feels something is missing from her life. Not achievements, but a true sense of belonging. I share the personal story behind the creation of the Soulful Women’s Network: how a “kick in the gut” moment led me to build a space where spiritually minded women can mastermind, grow, and thrive together. We talk honestly about why community isn’t a luxury but a lifeline, and how to find — or create — the kind of sisterhood that actually holds you. Key topics covered include: The Importance of Community After 50: Why we need to move past loneliness and find our “people” to navigate transition, grief, and growth. The Origin Story: How I navigated the shift from local in-person networking to building my own unique, soul-centered community. How to Build Your Own Group: Practical advice on determining your end goal, choosing your platform (Facebook, Meetup, etc.), and enlisting help. Designing Your Own Path: Why it’s okay if an existing community isn’t the right fit and how to take the “bull by the horns” to create what you need. Light Language Activation: I close the episode with a channeled light language transmission intended to help you release what no longer serves you and align with your soul’s highest good. Whether you are looking for a community to join or feeling called to start your own, this episode provides actionable insights on how to foster the sisterhood you deserve. Resources & links mentioned: Search for the Soulful Women’s Network by name on Facebook or visit bit.ly/soulnetwork to see if our community is right for you Related episode: Breaking Free from Loneliness: Community After 50 Community platforms mentioned: Facebook Groups, Meetup, Skool, Heartbeat Book a 30-minute private Light Language session with Gloria Grace: tidycal.com/gloria3/single-light-language-session Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Get my free Personal Power Archetype Quiz to start designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s been feeling disconnected or lonely in this season of life. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Namaste. Do you know what many women in their 50s and 60s who have designed their life their way have in common? They stopped doing things alone. They found their people a community of women who understand that this season of life is really ripe for possibilities and they know how to hold space for one another through these crazy transitions we go through, through self doubt, through grief, and through growth. So that’s what we’re going to be talking about today. And specifically what I created the Soulful Women’s Network to be, to be this place where space spiritually minded women over 50 come together to connect, to grow, and especially to thrive. Not despite of their age and experiences, but because of them. Now, I did talk a little bit about this group in a past episode. It was actually called Breaking Free from loneliness, community after 50. So I encourage you, if you haven’t listened to that one or watched it on wherever you watch the podcast, we’re on YouTube and it may even be on new reality TV. Now you can, you can watch it there. But today I thought that I wanted to really go into more detail about Soulful Women’s Network. And my intention, my hope is that you’ll consider joining it. And if it’s not what’s right for you, that’s fine too. And maybe it’ll inspire you to create your own group because again, we need community and, and not all communities are right for every person. So if you want to join mine, yay, I would love to have you join it. But if not, that’s okay too because you may find, like I did, that you may find that you’re called to start your own group. And I think that’s just as amazing. So let me tell you, let me tell you a story right now. So you know, if you got a cup of tea or. I’m a tea drinker, so I always say cup of tea. But if you’re a coffee drinker, you can have coffee. And let me, let me, let me tell you a little story about, about how this, how this idea came from. And it’s going back a couple of years. So for those of you who are regular listeners or watchers of this show, you know that I have, I separated from my husband in 2022 and when I did that, I moved to Melbourne, Florida. And so it’s a lovely, lovely community. Finding Authentic Community: The Women’s Prosperity Network And I was so excited about. One of the reasons I was, I’ll say one of the reasons I, I, I chose this location was because it would be closer, it would be a much closer drive for me to attend meetings of the Women’s Prosperity Network, which was an organization and I’m still a member of, but I’ve been a member of this organization for years and years and years now, probably. Oh my gosh, let’s see, 10 years, 12 years, I don’t know, it’s, it’s been a long time. And one of the reasons I joined that group in particular was because they, we would have meetings at a local restaurant and we would get together and mastermind. It was a place for really, what they talk about is to be real, where you can be real, you know, not put on a phony front like a lot of people, a lot of networking, business networking groups. I would say in particular, sometimes when you go to them, it’s like everybody’s just putting on this real, you know, front about, oh, business is great and you know, and then they want to be able to enroll you in their business, etc. Etc. Well, what attracted me to WPN is the fact that we could be real and say, you know, hey, this, I got this issue going on with me and my business. Can you maybe, can you give me some ideas on how to fix it? And we would brainstorm. I love masterminding. And that was what really attracted me to it. Now, of course, in 2020, as we all know, the world shut down and a lot of organizations, a lot of networking groups had to pivot for those who were meeting in person and start meeting online. And so that’s what Women’s Prosperity Network did. They started having more. I think they were already doing some meetings online, but they really embraced it and, and, and went, you know, full fledged because we couldn’t meet in person anymore. But by 2022, you know, things were opening up again and there was a local group that I had and actually I was, I belonged to the Orlando chapter and so I would go to meetings there, but I also would occasionally drive for an hour to come to the Brevard chapter because I knew some of the women who regularly attended that one and they were lovely women, they had become friends and I liked the atmosphere over there. It’s, it’s nice to be able to go to different chapters of an organization where, you know, that meet in different areas because then you get to meet new people. So, and, and, and there was a really good energy at the Brevard Chamber or chamber. Not the chamber, the chapter, the chapter. And so I was like, yes, this is great. Midlife Disappointment and the Loss of In-Person Connection Now I’m moving, I’m moving to Melbourne. I’ll be able to, as it turned out, drive like less than 10 minutes from the location of where, where they were having their meetings. I was like so psyched about it. Just one problem. The organization WPN Women’s Prosperity Network decided that they didn’t want to have any more in person chapter meetings. They wanted to move everything online and so they decided to close down all of the local chapters and so my lovely Brevard chapter would be no more and we weren’t going to be able to meet in person. Talk about a kick in the pants. A kick in the gut. It was so. I was so disappointed. I really was. I was just so disappointed because, you know, this was, this was, you know, I wouldn’t have to drive an hour anymore, you know, and I would get to see people in person. And as much as Zoom was so great for helping to keep us connected to people and enable us to connect with people all over the country, all over the world, I mean, was wonderful. I mean, and, and in effect in 2020 is when I, I started the end of 2019, but definitely in 2020 I started my Live Love Engage podcast. So which you can find old episodes of that. And so it was great. I loved being able to connect with people, but I wanted to see people in person again. I wanted to give my friends a hug. You know, we, hugs are so. There are scientific studies have shown that hugging someone is really good for your physical health as well as your mental health, frankly. So I was disappointed, needless to say, that they weren’t going to be meeting in person anymore. Meditation, Inner Wisdom, and the Birth of Soulful Women’s Network So what did I do? Well, I, I didn’t automatically come up with this idea to, to create my own network. What I did do though was continue some of my spiritual practices that I have developed over the years and, and, and the one that I’ve been doing the longest is meditating. And so I. Every morning, that is my non negotiable part of my routine now. Journaling comes and goes, going for a walk, comes and goes. Sometimes I don’t do it in the morning and I will do it in the afternoon, but I make it a point to devote part, a part of my morning before I really get involved in working to meditating. Even if it’s 10 minutes, I’d like to do at least a half an hour, but even if it’s 10 minutes. So one morning after this had happened, probably a couple of months later, I suppose I don’t remember exactly. I do, I do know when I officially started the group. So, so sometime I would say probably over the summer of 2022 after I had moved here. I was meditating and an idea popped in my head. And as, as often happens when I’m meditating, that’s, that’s how I got, how I came up with the idea to write a book about love, which became my best selling book, Live Love Engage. An idea came to me that why don’t I just start my own networking group where we could meet in person? And the idea came to call it the Soulful Women’s Network. And I thought, oh, that’s a really cool name. So after I finished my meditation, I decided to go online and see if there was a Soulful Women’s network out there already because I thought that was a really good name for group and surely there must be some, some group out there. I mean, I put soulfulwomensnetwork.com in and didn’t get anything. And, and so I just did a regular Google search and I think I found there was one, one group in, I don’t know, Texas or something, but I don’t, I don’t think they were even. They weren’t current. I think they had called themselves that. They had some past meetings, but it didn’t seem like they were active. And since then I also checked that the domain was available. I said, you know what, I’m taking that as a sign from the universe that perhaps this is an opportunity. And so I went ahead and bought the domain and then I started talking to people about it. You know, does this sound like a good idea? You know, would you, would you attend meetings? So I did what a lot of people do is I started off with a free Facebook group, which is how, what you can take advantage of. In fact, I’ll have the link to that in the show notes. And for those of you watching this show right now, you’ll be able to see I’ve got the link for it right there. But you can go to Facebook directly and just search for Soulful Women’s Network and you’ll be able to see it. So it’s a free public group that you can join and. Oh, I just remembered. I, I forgot I saw something in my notifications on Facebook this morning that someone wanted to join and I need to go back in and get her information and let her into the group. How the Soulful Women’s Network Works: In-Person and Online Meetings So, yeah, so I decided, yeah, so I started the, the Facebook group and then I decided to. You know, my whole point was, was that I wanted to be able to have us start having meetings. And so, so we started meeting for lunch once a month. And so that was working out. But Then there were some people that didn’t live in the area here in Florida and I wanted to be able to have them come. So I thought so for a while what we were doing is we were, I think I was doing every other month possibly or we were meeting twice, twice a quarter in person and then once a quarter online. And so that was that, that worked for a while. And now what I’m doing, I’m experimenting because that’s, that’s what you do when you, when you do things, you do things for a while and, and then you experiment. And so now what I’m doing right now is having one meeting in person on the second Thursday of the month and then another one online the fourth Thursday of the month. So this way I can accommodate local people as well as folks who are not in the area or who for whatever reason maybe just can’t attend the in person one. You know, they may live in the area but they’re busy that day. And you know, life happens, we get busy and there’s nothing wrong with that. Masterminding, Sisterhood, and the Power of Women Supporting Women So that’s been great. And I really enjoy being able to get together and we, we spend some time. I, I always start our meetings a daily word from, from Unity, a daily word message and related to the topic of the, our discussion for that month. And then, and then we, you know, talk about the reading and then we do some master, I do some share some information about whatever our topic is and then we do some masterminding. And that’s what I think is so wonderful about, about it is. And then I know I’ve had people say, is that they love being able to come together and help each other, you know, because that’s what we get to do. If someone has a challenge, we’re able to brainstorm ways to help them to solve that challenge. So it’s, I think it’s, I think it’s, it’s a great way. And that’s why I say that’s why I love the power of community. You know, any type of group that you can join that brings people together that share a common bond. I don’t know what I was starting to say there. I guess I was. Oh yeah, I was putting share and common together. So I was saying shaman. But that’s a different, that’s a different entity altogether. But yeah, it’s, I think it’s really great to be able to do that, to be able to come together with people. And I have. Originally the Soulful Women’s Network was open to any, any woman of any age that was my, that was my intention. But, but I’ve realized that the people who are coming to the group and myself as well, we’re over 50. So I decided, you know what, let’s just declare it. So it is the Soulful Women’s Network for women over 50. And that’s, that’s what it’s for. So it, the, the Facebook group in is a great place for you to get some guidance on, you know, how to dismantle self doubt, how to cope with things that, you know, different challenges that women over 50 face. And, and I, you know, occasionally I’ll share like clips from this podcast into the group when we deal with something specific about that. And it’s also a place where we share inspiration to help you to really build a legacy that reflects your inner strength. And we really do believe in the power of sisterhood, to expand our impact in the world, to help each other to rise so that we can all shine together. So let me think, what else do I want to tell you about this? I, I guess the point here, like I said, is whether you do decide to check out the, the Soulful Women’s Network. I hope you will because as I said, it’s, it’s a, it’s open to, you know, women over 50. I do have some questions that you have to answer, even though it’s a public group, but you still need to answer the questions. And, and it is for women only, of course. So, you know, I hope you’ll come and check it out and see if it is something that you think would be beneficial to you. And if it, if it is, great. And then I hope you’ll even come join us for our, our monthly meetings because that’s, that’s really where the magic happens is if you’re, if you’ve been a member of a Facebook group or you’ve been an administrator of your own, you know, it can be challenging sometimes to get interaction and, and just to keep up with putting content out there, but it is, it is a labor, labor of love that I, that I do. And, and we do have a few members that will share their own stuff in there, which I always encourage. You know, I want, I’d love to see the participation in the group. So I hope that you will consider that. And as I said, perhaps you might, if this isn’t for you, maybe you might want to consider starting your own group. Think about and, and I guess what I would encourage you to do if you are going to do this is figure out what you want out of the group? Is it a place where you just want to be able to come together and socialize? Is it. Is it a group where you want to be able to teach something? Is it a group that you want to use to be able to grow your business? Is it just a social group? It’s important for you to figure out what your goal is first before you go to the trouble of creating a group that’s so important. I really highly encourage you to do that. So figure out what is your end goal and then figure out who. How to Start Your Own Women’s Community Group After 50 Who do you want to attract to that group? And if you know some people already who you think would be great members of the group, talk to them about it, reach out to them, you know, send them a text, maybe pick up the phone old school and call them and ask them and say, hey, I’m thinking about starting a group to do xyz. What do you think? Would you, would you attend this group? Would you come to meetings? Would you participate in. In a Facebook group or maybe a group on some other platform? You know, there are plenty of other platforms out there these days. I know school. I see people creating groups on there. And that’s spelled S K O O L just by the way, if you’re not familiar with that one, you know, you could even just create a. I was a member of a group a few years ago where it was. I don’t even think she had a Facebook group. We just. She would do meetup events and it was, it was designed for like women over 50 as a social group. And so she would just create a. Create an event on meetup and invite people to it. And so that’s another way that you can do because you can actually then create a group on meetup for a particular event. So I hope you’ll help. You’ll consider it today and think about, like I said, think about mine group, but definitely consider either joining someone else’s group. Of course, you don’t have to go to the trouble of creating one if there are some groups in your area. Maybe you’re feeling like you’re. You need a community and you, you want to be able to connect with people who have similar interests as you or similar profession as you. There. There are all sorts of different groups out there. And in fact, you can go onto any of these platforms I talked about. You can go on to Meet Book. Meet Book. I love when I put words together. My brain is thinking too fast. Meetup or Facebook or skool is another one. I know there’s. I feel like I’m missing Some. Something. Well, there’s some other. Other people. Other platforms that people use, like I’m. I’m in a couple on Heartbeat. That’s another one where you might find a community. So there’s lots of different places out there. So number one, I guess, for you, for you, if you’re going to, if you want to look at joining a group is to again, think of what, what are you missing in your life right now that, That a group might be able to fill. Where. Is it something where you want to be able to nurture a talent of yours, or is it something you just want to. Maybe you’re single and you want to meet some other singles or maybe you want to meet with other. With other working moms or what have you. I mean, I, I used to belong to a wonderful group called Mothers and More. When, When I first moved from Miami to Orlando and I, I left my friends behind. I, I needed to find other people to be able to talk with. Mothers and More: A Template for Meaningful Women’s Community You know, I didn’t, I didn’t want to just sit at home alone, especially since I worked from home. I needed to be able to find some other groups. And I, I did join some business groups, but I wanted to be with people to talk about, to be more social. And so Mothers and More was a fabulous group that I connected with. And we, you know, we held. We would have sometimes some meetings where it was. Speakers would come in and, and talk to us about, you know, something relevant or we would also have. Where we would have Mom’s Night out, where we’d go to a restaurant and, you know, kind of talk about what’s going on in our lives and, you know, enjoy a cocktail or what have you. And then once a year we would do Mom’s Weekend out, which was really great. I went to a couple of those. And I know one year we took the train to Savannah and spent a weekend in Savannah, Georgia. That was awesome. We even went camping one time. It was very cool. Yeah, I miss Mothers and More. That organization isn’t around anymore, but it’s making me wonder if I want to morph my Soulful Women’s Network a lot that way. I need you. I need. I’m going to need to think about this and maybe see if there’s some elements of Soulful Women’s Network that I want to put or of Mothers and More that I want to put into Soulful Women’s Network. There we go. Stay tuned. We’ll see. But I really did enjoy that group. So. Yeah. Yeah, think about what, what do you need what’s missing from your life right now that a group might be able to help you fill and then do some searching and see if you can find it. And then, as I said, if you can’t. If you can’t find a group that has what you want, then. Then you might want to consider starting your own. Because sometimes that’s what we have to do. You know, you got to take. Take the bull by the horns. Just do it. You know, you can make it work. I would advise if you can enlist a. Enlist a friend to help you, that’s even better because then the load is shared and you’re not. Everything isn’t just falling on your shoulders. So, yeah, if you’ve got. If you’ve got a good friend out there who you might want to enlist in this. In this endeavor, I highly recommend that. So, yeah. Okay, cool. Light Language Healing Transmission: Releasing What No Longer Serves You All right. I’m gonna do one other thing before we close out the show today is to do what is one of my favorite things that I. It’s a practice, a spiritual practice that I share, and it’s one that I’d love to share when I do solo episodes. And. And we will have a guest next week, by the way. I need to remember. I wanna. I wanna talk about that. Yeah, I was gonna say remind me like you’re going to be able to do that, but anyway, so, yeah, I’m gonna do. I want to share with you a light language message today. And light language is. Is a spiritual modality. It’s a. It’s a channeling. I choose con. Messages, messages from the heart, which is my. My tagline, but messages from. From other realms, from other dimensions that are intended for your soul and your heart to understand, not necessarily your wonderful logical brain that we have. So I invite you to. When I do, When I’m. When I’m sharing this with. With you on the podcast, but also when I share it with clients, is to set an intention today that the message you are going to hear shortly will be something that will be to help you perhaps release whatever you need to release that doesn’t serve you anymore or to inspire you, or just whatever’s on your heart. Just ask that whatever you’re going to hear today will be ultimately for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. And that’s the intention I’m going to set. So as I always remind you on the podcast when I’m sharing, this is. If you are listening to the podcast while you’re driving, pause this. Come back to it when you can be Somewhere where you can be still and quiet. No, no other people around talking. Maybe put some headphones in and so you really are able to be not disturbed so you can really concentrate and just allow the, whatever comes through. Because it, it could be I may be speaking, I may be singing. I never quite know what’s going to come through. So you can, yeah. So I’m, I’m trusting that you have paused the podcast and now you’re, you’re going to be, you’re present and grounded and might want to take a deep breath and let it out. Oh, that feels good. Let’s do that again. One more in breath. Yeah, that, that works for me too. All right. Okay, let’s see what comes through today. That’ll be for your and my soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. [Light language audio transmission] Closing: Private Light Language Sessions and Living Boldly on Purpose I hope you received that with the love that was intended for you. And yeah, I really, I, I, I would love to hear from you if you ever have any, you know, if you’d like to comment or you want to. Yeah. Reach out and let me know what you think about anything about the podcast, but especially if you, if you are interested in the light language because I really, I love sharing it and I love to be able to also do one on ones with people. So if you ever wanted to consider having a private session with me, I would love to offer that to you. Well, there is a cost for it, but it’s, it’s, it’s a really great way to be able to, to work on something that is unique to you. Because, you know, when I’m sharing it in the podcast right now, it’s, it’s sort of a general thing, but when I work one on one with a client, I can, you know, we, can we talk about, we do this over zoom and we’ll talk about, you know, specifically what’s going on in your life right now that you need some support with. And then, then I can, you know, really ask for that divine guidance to, to help you. So if you ever feel called to that, let me know. You can go. You can find information about it on my website. Go to gloriarand.com I’ll, I’ll also have a link to where you could schedule a 30 minute session with me. I’ll put that in the show notes as well. So, yeah, so I think, I think this is going to do it for today. So I really do thank you for listening or watching and I really hope that today’s show has inspired you to live boldly and on purpose.

You’ve probably been holding on longer than you should — to a belief, a relationship, a version of yourself that no longer fits. This episode of Design Your Life, Your Way is about what becomes possible the moment you finally let go and live on purpose after 50. I’m starting a brand-new series with this episode: a monthly deep dive into each pillar of my L.O.V.E. Method, the heart of the Life on Purpose Framework that I use in coaching. We’re starting at the very beginning: Let Go and Let God. This conversation is for the woman over 50 who has spent decades staying in situations that no longer serve you, or quietly carrying the belief that you’re not quite worthy of the life you want. I get real about letting go of the limiting beliefs I’d been carrying that prevented me from living my life in a way that serves my soul. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why letting go of the belief that you’re not worthy of happiness is the first and most powerful step toward designing your life your way How people-pleasing keeps you from the life your soul is actually asking for, and how to start loosening that grip What 17 years of meditation taught me about listening to my own inner wisdom and acting on it The difference between feeling fear and being controlled by it, and why ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ is more than a bumper sticker You’ll also receive a live light language healing transmission — a multidimensional energy healing practice I use with my clients — designed to help you release whatever has been keeping you stuck. Come ready to breathe, reflect, and begin designing your life, your way. Resources & links mentioned: Live Love Engage: How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself — my bestselling book where the L.O.V.E. Method was born My YouTube channel where you’ll find additional light language videos: youtube.com/@gloriagracerand Previous podcast episode: How to Know When It’s Time to Pivot After 50 The Parisian Agency: Exclusive Properties on Netflix NewRealityTV.com – where you can watch episodes of Design Your Life, Your Way Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with me: gloriarand.com Join the waitlist for our Good Grief Women’s Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Get your free Personal Power Archetype Quiz to start designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a woman in your life who’s been settling for less than she deserves. She needs to hear his. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Gloria: Namaste. Have you ever considered what you need to let go of in order to design your life your way? Well, that’s what we’re going to talk about today. Specifically about. Yeah. Letting go and letting God. Because that is the. Let go and let God is the L in the love method that I wrote about in my best-selling book, Live Love Engage, how to stop doubting yourself and start being yourself. And it’s what I teach when I teach, when I, when I guest on other people’s podcasts. And it’s what I use in my elevate and empower coaching program for women over 50. And I thought it would be a good idea, especially because I know on my old podcast Live Love Engage, we. I have talked about the love method a lot and I thought it was time to do it here because I know that the. We do have some new listeners. And thank you to all of you who have been downloading the podcast or, or watching us on YouTube or even on new reality TV as well. So I so appreciate all of you. Embarking on a Journey of Self-Discovery And I thought it was. I wanted to start doing periodically here and, and actually, frankly, I plan to do this like once, once a month over the next four months. We’re going to go through the first, the, the letters of love, because in the love method, love is an acronym. So. So like as I said today, we’re going to focus on letting go and letting God and how that really ties into designing your life your way. And I want to share my experience because I know that this, this whole thing was given to me because I wasn’t living my life the way my soul wanted me to. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I was, I was making some notes today. I was. One of the things that came up for me was among the things that I had to let go of. And I’m already starting to get teary-eyed thinking about this. And I was going to do some other things, but let’s just jump right into the meat of it here. Letting go of the idea that I wasn’t worthy to be happy. Overcoming Limiting Beliefs and Rediscovering Worthiness Golly. Okay, so I still clearly have to work on this, I think, because I think that is why this is making me so emotional. There’s still part of me that doesn’t quite believe that yet. Maybe. Or maybe it’s happy tears. Yeah. You know what? Let’s reframe this. Yeah, that’s happy tears. My soul is so happy that I am living life a lot more in line with what it has wanted for me for a very long time. There you go. Yeah. See See, and that’s. Thank you, God. Thank you, source, the universe, whatever you believe. But for me, I. I still. I still come back to God. I was. I was raised Catholic. I’m not practicing anymore, but I still. Still believe in God. And because there is something I can’t. I, I. I don’t. I can’t not believe. I know I don’t like using double negatives, but I can’t not believe that there isn’t something out there. That is why we’re here. You know, frankly, so, so, yeah. So letting go of that, yeah, this. This I’m not worthy to be happy crapola, limiting belief is. Is. Is ridiculous. And if you are feeling any of that out there right now, I’m talking to you. I’m gonna get close to the microphone right here. Stop it. Just stop it. You are worthy no matter what situation you’re in in your life right now, no matter what challenges you may be facing. Practical Steps to Redesign Your Life And. And the whole idea of, like, sure, design my life my way. Yeah, easy for you to say, Gloria. I. I can’t do that right now because of xyz. You know what? Okay, you don’t have to design it your way today, but you could start planning it. And I talked about this a little bit in our last episode when I talked about, how do you know when it’s time to change? You know, how do you know when. When you hit that pivot point? So go back if you haven’t. If you haven’t watched that one or listened to it, go back and check it out. But let’s focus still on letting go. So I think one of. One of the. One of the main sticking points in why I settled for so long in and how my life was looking. And I would say especially after my wonderful two amazing kids, my. My son and daughter, after they moved out of the house, because when they were still living there, you know, I. I really had a. A purpose of, you know, being a mom. And, you know, and I’m still their mom. And. And. And they still do come for me to advice for advice occasionally, thank goodness. I. You know, but they are. They’re Both in their 30s now, and, you know, l. And doing a darn good job of it, I must say. So I must have done something right as a mom. That’s what my sister used to say anyway. She’s like, Gloria, yes, you’re doing better than our mom. So don’t. Don’t give yourself such a hard time. And I so appreciate that, Michaela. See, I can still hear you saying that even though you’re not here physically in the world to tell me that anymore. Breaking Free from Family Patterns and Expectations But where was I? Oh yeah, okay. So, yeah, so I was settling in my marriage, especially after the kids moved out and they were, you know, well on their way of living their own lives. And, and I think one of the main reasons was that I had this belief and, and, more often [than not], intention when I did get, when I did finally get married was that I wanted to be the one person in my family who was going to stay married, gosh darn it, because my parents had gotten divorced. Their divorce, actually I was checking on this today was what I suspected. After 40 years of marriage, they finally had their divorce become official. They were separated before that. My, my brother, he, he got married once and then got his marriage annulled, whatever. And then my sister, well, got married twice and got divorced twice. So. So there wasn’t this really great track record of successful marriages in, in my family, even though I knew other people who in my life who, who did manage to stay married till death do you part type of thing. So I was determined I was going to be that one, you know, I was going to be the sibling, you know, to. And so I really, I think that’s why I was. Even though I wasn’t happy about certain things in my marriage, I put up with them because okay, sure, I was raised this good cathing girl even though again, I didn’t have the best cath like role models but my in laws were good, they were practicing Catholics and they stayed married until my mother in law passed. The Power of Mindfulness, Meditation, and Nature So I did have that and I, and as I said, I had another good friends of my family, godparents of my kids and they also stayed married for well over 30 years, I think. So yeah, so I wasn’t, it took letting go of that idea and yeah, let’s jump right into letting God in. I’m going to go back to some other things too, but I want to jump into this. I think what a couple of the things that gave me the ability, gave me the ability to let go of that notion was that I had started a meditation practice back in 2009 and it has evolved over the years. I’ve done lots of different types of meditation and yet I still meditate to this day. And it’s, it’s, you know, getting almost going to be 30, almost going to be 20 years. Sorry, my math is bad. So, so 17 years, I guess. Yes, 17 years of meditating now I can officially say and that this is why I recommend meditation so much when I, I talk about it constantly, I think, on this podcast and, and with other guests we’ve had on the show and also with my own clients that. Doing some form. Doing some form of my mindfulness practice. Oh, my gosh, it’s so helpful to get to know yourself. And there’s other things, too. You know, journaling. I’ve done journaling off and on, I think, all of that time as well. But there’s something about getting quiet, really getting still and being able to listen to that, being able to hear, really hear that quiet voice inside of you that is your soul talking to you. So that’s where. Yeah, I think that’s. That’s what started. Well, of course, also starting to really delve into writing this book. Writing my book about the love method really did help me as well, because one of the things I did, one of the ways I was writing it, how I initially wrote the. The first draft of it, is I would go to the beach every week on a Friday morning when it wasn’t as. Wasn’t as crowded, you know, because weekends are always popular for the beach. So I would go on Friday morning and I would spend time writing in my book. But sometimes I would just spend time walking, walking along the beach and, and just listening to the waves and then listening to what my heart was trying to tell me. Because all of my life, even, you know, even though, again, I said I was. I was raised in the Catholic Church, would go to church every week, but really the ways that I felt close to God was when I was out in nature, whether it was when I was a kid and I would go to Girl Scout camp in the, in the woods of Michigan and, you know, walk, walk in the woods or go, you know, be out in a canoe on the lake. And then as I said, and then when I got older, and especially after I moved to Florida and was able to be able to go to the beach much more regularly, That is what had. I really do. It absolutely has helped me to be able to say, okay, what. What about your life is not. Is working? You know, what can we keep? What can we get rid of? You know, what. What changes do we need to make? Reclaiming Your Needs from People-Pleasing So I’ll come back to that in a minute because there’s some. Another part of that I’m going to share in a second. The other thing I needed to let go of. And, and, and again, this was for me, and whether this resonates with you or not, you know, consider it was letting go of the idea that I had to Put other people’s needs first before my own. And yeah, I, One of my default strategies that I learned as a kid was to be a people pleaser and to make sure that other people were happy. You know, I did, I would make myself happy too, but I really wanted to make sure before I could do. What I wanted to do was that other people were okay and that they were taken care of. And now there are some instances where that is really important. You know, when I became a mom and I had young kids, I did have to put their needs ahead of my own a lot of the time. And then when my sister was going through her cancer journey, I willingly, you know, flew across the country to be with her as often as I could to take, help take care of her, because she was my big sister. You know, she took care of me when I was, when I was a little squirt, you know, she babysat me. And I know, I’m sure as a, you know, 11 year old and 12 year old, she didn’t want to have to do that. And then certainly when she got older, as a teenager, have her little sister tagging along. I, I know there’s a, there’s a picture of me at my, one of my sister’s pajama parties. But after she passed and as I said, you know, my kids were living their own life. It’s like, okay, well, let me take a hard look and see is my life. Am I happy in my life? Has it turned out the way I wanted it to be? And there were a lot of things that were still great. You know, I had started my business and I loved being, being in business. I’d made some new friends along the way in the business and, you know, and I was exploring different ways of, of expressing spirituality. But there was this big neon sign that was staring me in the face that I kept trying to ignore where I had Been doing a lot of growing as a person, and the wonderful man that I married all those years ago wasn’t quite keeping up, God bless him, you know, and we’re. He’s still texting me this morning, you know, telling me about back at our house, that one of the. One of the bushes is dying, so he’s going to do some trimming of it, and, you know, and that’s fine. And we found a way to communicate that. Still, at times, sometimes I do need to set some better boundaries. But, you know, hey, nobody’s perfect. I don’t claim to be perfect. I’m always a work in progress, and I’m always striving to get better because, you know, as they say, if you’re not growing, you’re dying. And I don’t intend to die anytime soon. I got a lot of living to do. Letting Go of Fear and Embracing Change Okay, so let’s see, what else. What do I have in my notes here? What else did I have to let go of? Well, I think those are. Those are. Those are some biggies right there. And that’s what I invite you to do. If you are looking to design your life, your way is to start thinking about that. What. And it might be something like that where you make a. Make a list and, you know, list all the things in your life that you’re quite satisfied with, that you’re happy with. Then maybe list some things where there could be room for improvement. And then start looking at things, looking at those aspects of your life, the areas of your life perhaps where things aren’t quite the way you’d like them to be. And. And ask yourself, am I settling? Have I been settling for less than what I want? Because I’m trying to keep the peace or it’s too scary. There’s another thing. Yeah. Oh, that’s what I didn’t talk about. That’s a good one to talk about. Let’s talk about that. Letting go of fear oh, yeah, baby oh, yeah, yeah, yeah My heart is going yes, yes, yes. My soul is like, yes, you need to talk about this. Letting go of fear. Because humans are so interesting. We crave variety, and we crave stability. How do we make that work? How do we embrace change while also embrace keeping things the same, you know, or, you know, being comfortable? Because change often does require us to step out of our comfort zone. And being in our comfort zone is nice. It’s comfortable. You know, it’s why we don’t make change. Because we’re like, okay, you know, yeah, life is good. Life is fine. I. I can. I can be here and. And. And chill for a while, but at some point, we can start to be bored with that, and we start saying, like, oh, we need to shake things up. And here’s just a really simple example of that, and I know my sister was the same way, is that I like to rearrange furniture sometimes in my apartment. And I used to do this even as a kid in my bedroom. I would change around the configuration of my bedroom because that was one area I could control in my house. Because we. Like I said, I think we. We are creatures of habit, and yet we also like variety. And the only way to get variety in our life is to change something. So it’s like this weird dichotomy of, like, oh, I don’t like to change, but I really want to change. And so we, you know, it’s like, you know, you get the. The devil and the angel kind of fighting against each other. And there comes a point, and this was what I talked about last week, that pivot point where you finally reach a point where you’re like, okay, that’s it. I’m ready. I’m gonna make the change. I’m gonna do something different. So. But in order to do that, you do have to let go. You gotta let go of the fear. You gotta let go of that fear. And just what is it? False evidence. Appearing Real is the acronym someone some enlightened person came up with. So maybe it’s. It’s. It’s letting go of the. Oh, thank you. Letting go of the attachment to fear. Because that’s different, because fear keeps us safe. Sometimes it works a little too hard at keeping us safe. So it’s you still, when you take that courageous step to try something new, you’re gonna fear. You’re gonna be fearful as you do it. There’s no. Because otherwise you wouldn’t bother doing it. Right? So the fear is gonna be there, but so what you have to loosen, let go of is the. The attachment to that fear and just kind of say, okay, yes, I feel the fear and I’m doing it anyway. Yeah, feel the fear and do it anyway. Oh, that felt good. Yeah. Because when you do guess what happens if it really was something that you. Your soul was really wanting for you, it’s going to feel so good once you’ve done it. And you can be like, oh, why was I so afraid? And then you can laugh about it and that’s okay. We need a little laughter in our lives, you know? Letting God In: Communication and Faith And that’s a biggie. I can’t believe I didn’t even have that in my notes. That is so funny because that. I think that’s the biggest one to let go of. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so let’s talk about now letting go, but now letting God. We talked about this a little bit earlier. Oh, I saw an acronym once. I don’t know if I still have it written down here. Somebody. Yeah, I. I read something somewhere where, Where God stood for something, and I don’t have it now. Doggone it. Yeah, it was. I wonder if I could think. Maybe I could just think of one. What. What could. What could God stand for as an acronym? Getting own desire. Going. I don’t know. I can’t think of it. All right, whatever. We’re not going to worry about it anyway. Letting God. Letting God. Letting source. Letting your higher self in. Whatever it is for you. For me, what helped me to design my life my way was, as I mentioned before, meditating for sure. Journaling, getting to know. Getting to know myself, but. And really getting to listen to it and hear it and act on it. Yeah. And acting on it. And that was how I was able to design my life my way. And one of the other things that I did and was something that a gift was given to me was this ability to communicate in a way that bypasses my. My logical brain. It’s a way of communicating that speaks directly to my heart and my soul. And it’s something that. It’s called light language. And it’s. It’s not as popular as modalities like Reiki, but I think it’s. It’s getting to be more visible, more. I wouldn’t say mainstream yet. It’s still probably what a lot of people would call woo. Woo. And I’m okay with that. I’ve. I’ve embraced the woo side of me. Using Light Language for Transformation It’s. It’s. It’s perfectly fine. It’s. It’s interesting and different and, and unique and a way for me to express my. It’s a way for me to express myself in A way that I didn’t know I could. And yet as I have come to understand it, it really is a way that we all were able to communicate before we came into these human bodies. So it’s why I think to a lot of people when they do hear light language, it sounds familiar even though they may not again be able to translate it word for word. Sometimes you might be able to translate the emotions and the feelings that come through as opposed to a literal word for word translation, you know, like you can do if you hear, if you hear French. I, I, I love watching on Netflix. There’s this real estate show, these high end family of realtors in Paris and I forget the name of the show if I find it, I’ll put it in the show notes and you can check it out. But I’ve been, I’ve been watching the show now for about maybe six years now. I think they’re on their sixth season or something like that. And so I don’t speak French. I know a few words here and there from like when I was a kid and I, I’ve learned a little bit of it but so I’ll put the English, you know, subtitles up there but I don’t have to because I, I have that ability. But like I said, light language is something that, it’s a, it’s a multidimensional communication form of communication that again, it’s something that speaks to, can speak to your heart, can speak to your soul. And what I found for me was that it really was able to help me to let go of some of these limiting beliefs that I, we talked about earlier today where I talked about, you know, having that people pleasing tendency or you know, this belief that I’m not worthy. Light language helped me to, really has helped me and continues to help me as I continue to practice it. It continues to help me to that and that’s why I love sharing it with, with clients, I love sharing it with other people. [Audio transmission only] Closing Thoughts: Living Boldly and On Purpose Oh goodness. I, I, I hope that helps you to release whatever has been keeping you stuck possibly or just, you know, allows you to think a little clearer maybe in answering those questions I talked about earlier. So, and you can always go back in and listen to this again too if you want to. Just go back in to the end and listen to that a couple of times. And if you go to my YouTube channel, you will also find that I do have some light language, other light language videos on there where I have shared, shared specific messages. Some, some that were taken from my past podcasts and some that were just recorded, recorded straight for, for YouTube. So go to Gloria Grace Rand on YouTube and you’ll be able to find those there. So I think, I think that’s gonna do it for today. I really hope that you are letting go. If you have any people pleasing tendencies, let them go a little bit. Oh, let them go. Just let them go. Let it go, Let it go. I’m, I’m gonna, I’m gonna singing mood today. What can I say? Let it go. Let go. Whatever is. Let go of the idea that you’re not worthy to be happy. Yeah, that’s, let’s go back to that one and start thinking of how you want, how do you want your life to look if it’s not, if it’s there and it’s great. Hey, wonderful. Share this podcast with someone who maybe might need some help in that. In that area. And if you do have some areas where things are not quite the way you’d like them to be, then, you know, it’s never too late. You can always start over. I mean, hey, I was. Let’s see, I was 59 when I’ve decided to do this, to do. To move out and to ask for a divorce, I think. Or I was in my late 50s. Okay, so you never. It’s never too late. I just. I just hope that you know that you. You deserve all the love and happiness and joy in your life because you are an amazing human being. I may not know you personally, but I’m grateful to you for listening. If you listen this far, if you watched this far, I’m so grateful for you. And I just. Yeah, I’m. I’m just really grateful. So thank you. Thank you for being with me today. I hope my words have inspired you to go out today and live boldly and on purpose.

It’s not unusual for a moment to arrive after 50 when the life you’ve built stops fitting who you’ve become. This edition of Design Your Life, Your Way is all about learning to trust that inner knowing to pivot, even when it asks everything of you. There often comes a time in midlife when the life you’ve been living no longer feels like your own. Maybe it’s the marriage that drifted, a career that lost its meaning, or simply the growing ache of wanting something more aligned with who you are now. As you’ll learn in this conversation, I reached a pivot point in my marriage that came about after years of inner work and courage-building. I also share the slower, sacred pivot in my professional life from SEO copywriter to midlife empowerment guide and light language channel. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why the pivot point often arrives not as a crisis, but as a quiet, undeniable knowing — and how to honor it. How years of inner work (meditation, journaling, coaching, retreats) can lay the foundation for courageous life changes. The role clarity plays in knowing not just when to change course, but which direction to move. How Gloria finally found the courage to leave a 30-year marriage — and how that decision helped both of them. Why your professional pivot may be a divine download waiting for you to catch up to it. A live light language transmission to help you release what no longer serves you and invite clarity in. Whether you’re standing at the edge of a major change or just beginning to hear the whisper that something needs to shift, this episode will help you recognize the signs, trust your inner wisdom, and take the first step toward designing your life your way. Resources & links mentioned: Laurie Jacobson’s episode: Midlife Rebirth: Silence & Self-Love for a New Start Brand Clarity Workshop Series* with Tiffany Neuman: https://app.heartbeat.chat/yourlegacybrand/invitation?code=E24EE5 Book a complimentary 15-minute Light Language session: https://tidycal.com/gloria3/lightlanguageintro *FYI – I will receive compensation if you sign up for Tiffany’s workshop. Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace Rand: gloriarand.com Join the waitlist for our upcoming Good Grief Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Get your free Personal Power Archetype Quiz to start designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s standing at her own pivot point. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Namaste. How do you know when it’s time to change course in your life or your business? We’re going to be talking about that today. We’re going to talk about this pivot point and how you can, I guess, prime yourself for recognizing it or just be. Yeah. Yeah. How to prime yourself for recognizing it. Yeah. That’s what I’m going to say. That’s, that’s my plan. And that’s what I’m sticking to it today. Oh, goodness. Yeah. well, I tell you, it’s this is an interesting thing I want to share. I’ll share a story from my life because it’s been, at least for my personal life. And then we’ll talk about, we’ll talk about the business side of it as well. for me, it’s been a little stranger, shall we say? About. Well, no, actually. Okay, you know what? Yeah, I’ve got lots of examples. I’m just. I’m realizing it today. I mean, I know I always come prepared with some notes about where I want to go today, but, but I’m just thinking now that. Yeah. How do you know when it’s time to change course? A Marriage of 30+ Years and the Moment Everything Shifted Well, for me, in my personal life, I mean, one of the big one of the big changes that I made a course correction, I guess, if you will, or definitely a maybe not a course correction, but a definite, definite pivot point for me came about when I knew I was four years ago. Four years ago. No, I guess even five years ago now. Yeah. It was. That’s right. It was five years ago. It was five years ago. And it was January of twenty twenty one, as a matter of fact. Yeah. That’s right. So it was five years ago. And, something happened and and I’m not going to go into it, but there was just something was happening in the world, let’s just say. And the way that my, my, my significant other, my husband reacted to what was going on. Shook me to the core. And I realized at that moment that our values just weren’t in alignment anymore. I had put up with a lot of a lot of things. And of course, he puts up, he had, you know, we’ve been married at that point, you know, well over thirty years. And, you know, we each have our faults, you know, nobody’s perfect. And I put up with a lot from him and he put up with a lot from me. But I’d also been unhappy for a long time, seriously unhappy in my marriage. I there were there were things about it, you know, you know, we got two kids and, and of course, when they were younger, I. And even I think probably when they were younger, I was fine. But it was like, as the years go by, there are certain times and certain things that, you know, I realized that I was putting up with a lot of stuff for a long time. When You Realize You Married Your Mother And I also had realized that my husband, shared a lot of the same characteristics of my mother, God rest her soul, not necessarily the good characteristics. you know, and I wanted to say, you know, a a lot of times we, you know, girls marry their father. Well, I’m I’m married. My mother, frankly. and I should have known because, I mean, their birthdays are one day apart. you know, just decades apart, but one day apart the same month of the year. So the same astrological sign and that, that that was the clue right there. But you know, when you’re young and you’re in love, you overlook these things. And so we, you know, we raised two kids together. And, and for the most part, things were, were going okay. But as the kids got older, you know, got to middle middle school and high school and, and I had also started my business, around this time as well back in. Well, yeah. And so I started a business and didn’t get a lot of support from him at the beginning. And so like I said, there were things that just kind of kept piling on. The Fantasy That Kept Her Going — Until It Couldn’t And I and I used to, daydream of, frankly, leaving him and moving in with my sister. And even though that would necessitate moving to Arizona and I lived in Florida and I liked being closer to the ocean, so I wasn’t sure I really wanted to live in the desert. And then in the end of twenty sixteen, my sister passed from cancer. So. I didn’t have that fantasy, you know, that fantasy was over now. And it’s like, okay, so what am I going to do? Am I going to continue making the best of it and stay in this marriage because I really, I really did want to I, that was has had been my intention because everyone else in my family has gotten divorced. My parents got divorced eventually. My brother, well, he. He did get married, but then he wound up getting his marriage annulled. and then my sister got divorced. So not very good role models there. Now, frankly, my in-laws, they stayed married. they, you know, until until my mother in law passed. So they, they had a long marriage. In fact, they, they were married over forty years, as I recall. Yeah. We went to a forty. They, his, their daughter, my, my sister in law had thrown them a fortieth anniversary party. So I guess I did have and then I did have some other good friends that were another good, wonderful couple, that actually were godparents for my kids and, you know, they were a good role model for me. The Inner Work That Made the Pivot Possible But so as I said, my intention was to stay married, but I started really just feeling like I was putting up with a lot. And, and, and part of what was going on in my life at this time was that I was, I was doing some work on myself. So starting in two thousand and nine, I started my meditation practice and spending a lot of time getting to know myself again, getting to know and to trust my feelings. And then, around the time when my sister had, was diagnosed with, with cancer. And then after she passed, I was, I started really doing a lot of personal development work. I was in a mastermind that offered different personal development courses. And so it was really, I was really growing as a person. But that other person in my marriage wasn’t and, and didn’t really show any desire to want to do anything. And so that was really and, and I know that this is sort of a trope, you know, it’s, it’s the age old thing, you know, one person is growing, you know, and the other, you know, the, oh, we’re, we’re drifting apart type of thing. Well, yeah, it’s, it’s, it’s, it happens. And it really was happening for me because I was. I was doing a lot of work on myself and learning about myself and starting to really get to know who I am at my core. And, and even just remembering who I, frankly, who I was before I got involved in this relationship. Recognizing You’ve Been Dimming Your Own Light And I didn’t like some of the things that I was doing. I didn’t I didn’t really like who I had become in the marriage, because I was this person who was making a lot of compromises and not speaking up and just letting him make decisions. And, and I had, I realized that, and I think I’ve even might have talked about this before on the podcast, but I realized that I had, I was becoming like my dad and that when my parents, how I remember their relationship growing up was that he was very quiet. And my mom was very, very much, in a way more of the man in the family. You know, she was a very masculine energy. She was very, very straightforward, very, very loud at times. Now, my dad could sometimes, but again, he was seemed to have more of a passive energy, let’s say not necessarily feminine, but very passive. And I think that’s how he figured it was probably better to just kind of let her take the lead on stuff. And because he didn’t want to pick a fight with her. And, and I realized that I had was doing the same type of thing. And I didn’t like that because I am a strong personality. You know, I think we all are. And, and I just realized that I was hiding my light. I wasn’t shining my light. How Do You Know When It’s Time? A Wise Coach’s Answer So one of the things that I, I started doing was I not only doing personal development work, but I was also working with different coaches and at different times. And I remember as this was starting to come to a head and it was probably around the time maybe twenty nineteen or so that I was working with this one. One lovely coach. She unfortunately has since passed, but her name is Marty. And I said, you know, how do you how do you know when is the right time? Because I was like feeling like I, I might want to, you know, ask for a divorce, but I was, I was scared and I wasn’t sure what, you know, how that was going to change my life. And, and I was also again, had been this person who was very conflict avoidant because I had grown up in a home where there was a lot of family drama and yelling and, stuff. So I didn’t like that. And so again, that was part of what, these habits of I, you know, became this people pleaser, and didn’t want to make waves. But yeah, so, so she gave me a wonderful piece of advice, which I’m going to pass along to you on. How do you know when it’s time to change course? She says, you’ll know there will come a time when you just will know. And she was right. And, and like I said, it happened for me in twenty twenty one. Getting Your Ducks in a Row: The Year Before the Conversation Now I didn’t it took me a whole nother year to actually have the conversation with my husband because I wanted to get all my ducks in a row. And so I worked with a divorce coach. because I wanted to, I wanted to make this an amicable divorce. I’ve heard so many horror stories of couples who, you know, really get into these horrible divorces where, you know, they’re they’re just really yelling and, and, and it’s very vindictive and, you know, working with attorneys and just, I didn’t want that because I wasn’t in an abusive, you know, physically abusive relationship. He did have a temper sometimes, but he didn’t he never, you know, took it out on me physically, thank goodness. Or I probably would have left a lot sooner. Somehow I would have found the way I know I feel in my core that I would have. But it was more of. Psychological. And again, not. Not as to the degree. Recently I had Laurie Jacobson on the, on the program and, you may have seen, seen that episode or heard that episode yet. but if not, look out for it. But she, she was in a really, I think emotionally, emotionally, emotionally abusive relationship with her, with her spouse before she decided to leave. So mine had some of that. But, you know, mostly he was, you know, and I, I do, I, I, you know, I get along with him. I don’t, I still know now that I don’t want to ever live with him again. He’s a good guy, but I don’t want to live with him. But I, I knew that I wanted to, I wanted this to be as easy as possible. And that’s why it took me a year to kind of get things in line before I actually asked him. But it was really interesting. It was that when this, this event happened and and. how he responded to it. And it was also thinking back of how he had some other things, too, that I realized it was like, you know, that’s it. Yeah, I just, I can’t do it anymore. Designing Life on Your Own Terms — and What That Looks Like Now And, and that’s when I just started to look at how I could design my life my way. And you know, what’s led me to where I am today? You know, living on my own, living in an apartment. We, we are still connected. And, and it’s okay because my leaving helped him to start taking more responsibility and doing things that I was doing for him a lot. and I think it’s much better this way. And, and I’m proud of myself for finally honoring who I am and realizing that I deserve to be happy in a way that makes me happy. Right? And so you do too. You deserve to have a life that serves you. And if you are not having that right now, then it’s time for you to start thinking about what will it take to change that. The Foundation That Makes a Pivot Possible: Doing the Inner Work And, and the other point I want to make here is that. All along the way, before I finally came to that pivot point and, and where I was like, okay, yeah, this is it. You know, I’m done. I was taking action. I was attending courses, you know, or, or workshops I was working with different coaches. I was spending a lot of time in inner work. I was meditating, I was journaling, and so doing that is what laid the foundation for me to finally come to the decision, because I was getting to know myself, and I was really starting to pay attention and figure out what do I want? What do I want from this life? What would make me happy? And it finally came to the point where it was like, okay, yeah, what I want is for things to change. I don’t want to be in this relationship the same way anymore. The Retreat That Gave Her the Courage to Let Go And I will tell you one. One of the. Shortly before I finally got up the courage to talk to him, I was at a. I went to a retreat again. Retreats are wonderful to get away for a few days, and I was on. I went to this retreat in Florida and with a wonderful group of women and, you know, I was talking about what was going on with my life and how I was really, you know, not happy in my marriage. And seriously looking at I think I’m going to be asking him for a divorce. And, you know, I’ve been working on working on doing that. And there’s, it’s, I’m getting ready to do that. And so they asked me, you know, why? Why are you wearing a wedding ring then? And I was like, oh, that’s interesting. And so I took my wedding ring off that weekend and haven’t worn it since even before we separated. Now he. He still wears his. But to me, it really was that symbol of letting go. You know, I talk about letting go and letting God as part of the the love method. So yeah, I had, I, I let that ring go. It’s put away safely with my other jewelry, but I had to let that let that part of my life go. And I think that was also what started again, giving me that courage to finally say, yeah, this is, this is what I want for my life now. Midlife Career Pivots: When Your Professional Life Needs to Change Too Now I wanted to talk about also in business, because I know a lot of you out there are entrepreneurs or, or maybe you’re working, maybe you’re a professional and you are working for an organization and, and again, you know, in when we get to be definitely over fifty, I think for sure. And we, you know, we hit midlife that we do start asking these questions, you know, is this all there is? You know, do I still want to not only my personal life do the same things, but maybe in my professional life, I want to do something different. And, and you start kind of thinking about what is it I want to do? And, and sometimes what happens to precipitate this is maybe it is your kids finally moving out of the house and starting their own lives. And now you’re an empty nester and you’re, you know, even though you’ve been maybe happily employed or maybe you haven’t been employed, but maybe you’ve been a stay at home mom and you now you want to do something or you have been working, whether it is whether you are working a nine to five job or whether you’ve had your business, and maybe that has served you for a long time. But you know, now you’re like, well. Is this the time for me to make a change? How do I know when it’s time? What? What can I do? When Loss Becomes the Catalyst for Professional Reinvention And I think sometimes it is going to be it could be having having something happen in your life. So it could be perhaps, maybe, maybe a relationship change prompts you to make the business change, you know, or the professional change. Because maybe, maybe it’s not you who decided in the marriage, maybe your spouse did. And so now you are taking a look at all areas of your life. So that could be something that happens. It could be that perhaps you lose a loved one. Maybe it is your spouse. Maybe now you have become a widow. Or maybe it’s a close family member. Like for me, when my sister passed, that was a big shock to me because she was the last person of, of my, you know, immediate family that I had grown up with. And, and even though I had been happily growing my SEO copywriting business. I wasn’t sure I wanted to keep doing that. And I was really considering what did I want to do differently? So. Or if you know, if I wanted to continue even doing it at all. And so for me, that journey in a way has been ongoing, because it’s now been it’s been almost ten. No. Yeah. It’s been. Almost ten years since my sister passed. It’ll be ten years in about six months or so, eight months, eight months. And it’s really only been, I, I’ve been slowly pivoting out of doing the copywriting and into doing coaching, which was what I was really feeling drawn to do. A Divine Download: When the Universe Taps You on the Shoulder But. Even more than that, though, I think the. When is it time to change course? Mm. Sometimes. How do you know is when you get tapped on the shoulder by the universe. Mm-hm. Because I’m thinking now what is coming to mind is that what really changed my course and changed my direction will be ten years this October, when I was meditating and I heard this voice in my head say, you need to write a book about love. And. I looked around my. I opened my eyes, looked around my room, and went. Why would I write a book about love? What the heck do I know? Why do I know about love? Why I’m a copywriter? Why. Why would I write a book about love? Well, as it turned out, that that idea that really was the impetus for changing the course of my business, even though it took it took a while for that to, to formulate because I didn’t finish. I didn’t really seriously finish writing the book until twenty twenty, even though I started it. But, you know, I had to go through the grieving process, losing my sister. And, and so I was working on it here and there, but I finally, yeah, I really did take, I think I might have started know I started in twenty nineteen. Yeah, I started in twenty nineteen. Seriously writing it and then then finished it in twenty twenty. So. Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone to Discover What Lights You Up And I’m trying to think, how did I know when was the time for me to change course? Yeah, I think. Oh yes. Okay. So for me, for the business side of it, it was working with a coach and stepping out of my comfort zone. Because for me, even as I was writing this book, it still I was still doing copywriting. I was still working with small business owners, helping them, doing, doing content for their websites, helping them with emails, things like that. I was still doing that type of work, even though I, and I was giving like, you know, presentations about LinkedIn, I think I was doing LinkedIn course, all types of marketing stuff. You know, I was doing marketing stuff, even though I was. Being drawn to the coaching world and wanting to do more personal development, really work with, with people, with women in particular. And now, of course, I know for sure it’s women in midlife, women over fifty like I am to to work with them. But how did I know when it was time? It was when I stepped out of my comfort zone and talked. I gave a presentation on the Love Method. That’s what I write about in my book, where love is an acronym. And I had intended to do a presentation about LinkedIn for this or this women’s group, but they never publicized the topic. And so in working with my coach, my coach was encouraging me to talk about it because he felt it would help me to write the book if I started talking about it more. And he was right. It did help. So I asked the organizer if it was okay if I did this presentation and I talked about, you know, the love method. And so she said, yes. And so I did. And I, it was positively received. That’s, that’s what I’ll say. It was positively received by, by the women there. And that gave me the confidence to keep going, to really dive into what was the love method and to start writing the book. And, and then to start even doing. I know after that, I started doing Facebook lives where I was reading the Daily Word from Unity every day. I did this for like over a month where I was, I would go live every single day. And the first day again, I was nervous about doing it because people were used to hearing me talk about marketing, online marketing, not to talk about spirituality and God and and all of this. And so I was nervous, but I liked doing it. It lit me up inside to share the daily word. And eventually I started channeling light language too, which eventually I also started sharing. How to Start Knowing: The Tools That Help You Find Your Way So how do you know when it’s time to change course? Sometimes it’s getting that signal, getting some kind of a. Whether it is like a divine download, which is what I call my my idea to write a book about love or it is working with people and doing the work on yourself so that you start to. Know what you want because the only way to do that is to get to know yourself and. And then I recommend doing that. All the things I’ve talked about today is, is going to workshops. Go to retreats, work with coaches, work with counselors, do the inner work like practicing mindfulness or meditation journal, do breathwork, whatever, whatever you find that you can do to help yourself, start to know who you are because that is the only way that you are then going to be able to design your life your way. You got to learn who you are, what you believe, what do you value? And, and then you can start putting that into action. Your Values Are Your Compass for Changing Course And I want to read this to you. This was some some work that I did last year when I was working with my branding coach, Tiffany Neuman, was coming up with what are my values? And I actually, my, my website has been redesigned now thanks to my wonderful daughter, Ali Rand and we put these values on, on the website. But, but I had their slightly written a little bit different than how I have them, but this was my initial way of putting them together. And this was these are my values and. Maybe they’ll inspire you by sharing them today to come up with your own values and figure out what. Yeah, what’s important to you because that will help you in. Then. Changing course. It’ll give you the help to give you the direction of not only knowing now knowing once you know when it’s time to change course, this will help you know that you’re moving in the right direction. So for me, my values are authenticity and it comes from being true to yourself always and in all ways. Acceptance of your divine nature leads to freedom. Joy is your birthright. Live it. Love is what you’re made of. Embrace it. Be of service to others, however, and whenever you can. Spirituality. It’s the thread that connects us to one another, and our higher power and community is how we thrive. And I love I have them, I was reading them because I have them saved on a little piece of paper and I. I like putting them, keeping them on my desktop to as a reminder to me that of what’s, what’s really important. Keep Moving, Keep Growing: A Summary for Your Own Pivot And yeah, so. I think I’ve covered the main points. Yeah, I of how, how to know when it’s time to change course because it’s, I think mostly it’s about keep moving, you know, keep, keep moving, keep growing. And, and also then yeah, determining, start formulating a picture of what you want. Because once you do get clear on what you want, then as you are doing this work, eventually there will come a time. Maybe someone will come into your life. You’ll. Or you’ll, you’ll get some sort of a sign that like, okay, yeah, now is the time. It’s time to move forward. I’ve done the prep work, but now it’s time to just really dive in and, and change course and, and make, make that change. And whether it’s in your personal life or your professional life, you can do it. Light Language Transmission: Releasing What Doesn’t Serve You So what I want to share with you right now, before we end today’s show, is something I mentioned briefly, something that I also started to do, which has, which has also been a tool that I have used to help me in releasing what doesn’t serve me and helping me to gain more clarity about taking different actions in my life. And so what I want to share with you right now is something that I call light language. And it is a form of communication that I speak and I sing, sometimes both not at the same time. That would be a good trick, but, but I do, you know, depending sometimes it’s only spoken, sometimes it’s only sung or sometimes I go back and forth. But what it is, is it’s something that, it’s a, it’s a language that may sound familiar to you, but you can’t quite place it. And that’s okay because it’s really a language that is meant for your heart. It is, it’s almost, it’s a type of sound healing really, because it’s everything that we, we speak is, is a vibration and it’s a frequency. And when I am sharing this, it really is a love frequency. And so it’s a very, I feel very healing. Spiritual healing could be even be physically healing, but definitely emotionally and spiritually healing type of message. So what I will invite you to do today is if you’re listening to this, while you’re driving your car to pause and come back to this later when you can be, sitting somewhere comfortably, ideally even to just close your eyes and just allow whatever comes through to wash over you and, and set an intention that whatever you do here today, maybe it will be, maybe you are looking at trying to know when it’s time to change course and ask for guidance. Ask for a sign that you know that will allow you to know it’s time. So set that intention. But regardless, whatever that the message you hear is going to be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. So that’s, that’s the intention I am setting that what I share will be for your soul’s highest good. So just relax, breathe, close your eyes if you like. I’m going to close my eyes because I like to. I like to close my eyes when I do this too. Okay. [Audio transmission only] Closing: Every Decade Better Than the One Before Hope you enjoyed that today. And, I would like to encourage you or invite maybe not encourage, let’s say invite invite you to,. Get if you’d like to know more about yeah, if you’d like to know more about light language, maybe you’d like to work with me. and, actually. Get a, get a, a private session with me. I do, I do a intro, an intro introductory session, that you can schedule. It’s like a fifteen minute one, so you’ll have it. So it’ll be a little bit longer than what I just shared with you now. And we’ll be able to work on something that is unique to you, what, what you’re particularly going through. So I will have the link to that in the show notes, today. So, and of course, if you’re watching this, you, you’ll, you’ll see the link right on the screen. So you can, you can go there and schedule a complimentary fifteen minute session with me and then, you know, see how, see if you like it, because I do also offer longer sessions that you can, that you can purchase as well. So, yeah, I really, I’m, I’m so glad to be with you. I’d love to, I love, I love talking about how to, how to make midlife your best time of your life. And because I was, I was talking with someone the other day. I was saying that, you know, every decade I’ve, I’ve, I’ve been in now has been better than the one before. You know, my forties were good. even though I had some losses during that time. But then my fifties were good. And again, even though I had some losses in those times, but overall, it was still good because I was growing and I was learning. And now my sixties also and a phenomenal time. And I am looking forward to, well, first getting through the rest of this decade. But, you know, we’ll see what the seventies hold for me because I’ll probably still be here doing, maybe doing this podcast or maybe doing something else. Who knows? Oh my gosh. Yeah. Who knows? Who knows where we’ll be. But for now, I want to thank you for being here today, and I hope that you’ve learned something to help you to live life boldly and on purpose.

Have you ever felt something was broken inside of you after hitting a low point in your life? Sunshine Witchski spent years believing that until sobriety taught her that rock bottom was really the foundation she’d been building on all along. This episode is for any woman who’s ever had to burn something down to find out who she really is. As you’ll learn from my conversation with Sunshine Witchski, aka the Pink-Haired Sober Witch, recovery and magic turn out to be the same journey. Together, Sunshine and I explore what it means to face your shadows with grace instead of shame, why community after 50 is non-negotiable in the healing journey, and how spiritual rituals can become the anchor that holds you through life’s most turbulent transitions. Whether you’ve wrestled with a substance, a behavior, or simply a version of yourself that no longer fits, you’ll walk away with practical tools, a deeper sense of possibility, and the quiet reassurance that you are not too far gone. In this episode, you’ll discover: What “magic” really means and why prayer, affirmation, and intention-setting are all forms of it that you’re likely already practicing. How Sunshine’s rock bottom in 2019 became the doorway to her deepest spiritual awakening, and why that timing wasn’t a coincidence. Why shame is one of the greatest relapse risks — and how learning to give yourself grace is not weakness, but radical spiritual strength. The three-step framework for anyone navigating change: desire, willingness, and finding the right community to walk alongside you. How integrating daily spiritual rituals (prayer, journaling, meditation) can shift you from reactive healing to proactive wholeness. Why a coach or mentor can reach places a friend simply can’t — and how that investment is an act of self-love, not self-indulgence. About the Guest Sunshine Witchski is a trailblazing psychic medium, soul healer, spiritual advisor, high priestess, Reiki master, and bestselling author known as the Pink-Haired Sober Witch. After hitting her own rock bottom in 2019, she transformed her path of addiction recovery into a deeply rooted spiritual practice — and a movement. She is the founder of the Sober Witch Life Movement and The Sovereign Phoenix, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that supports witches in recovery with community, resources, and advocacy. Her mission: to help witches in recovery rediscover their magic, align with their highest purpose, and live the abundant life that sobriety makes possible. Connect with Sunshine Website: soberwitch.life Email: sunshine (at) soberwitch.life The Sovereign Phoenix Non-profit: thesovereignphoenix.com Resources & links mentioned: Dharma Recovery — Buddhist-aligned recovery support: recoverydharma.org SMART Recovery — secular, therapy-based recovery community: smartrecovery.org The Soulful Women’s Network — Gloria’s community for women over 50: bit.ly/soulnetwork Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace Rand: gloriagracerand.com Personal Power Archetype Quiz — Discover your unique power profile: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating recovery, reinvention, or a spiritual awakening of her own. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT What Magic Really Is (And Why You’re Already Practicing It) Gloria: What does magic mean to you? Sunshine: I believe that magic is our ability to work with the energies that surround us — to manifest, to change, to transform, to bring about the things in our life that we either need or desire. Magic is this literal setting of an intention and seeing it come into life. A prayer is a form of magic. An affirmation is a form of magic. A mantra is a form of magic. Anyone that’s ever read The Secret or books on the Law of Attraction — this is magic. Gloria: Our words are really powerful — they cast spells, which is why they call it spelling. They reflect our beliefs, sometimes our unconscious beliefs. You really have to be mindful about what you say because it can have an effect on you. Reclaiming the Word ‘Witch’ Sunshine: I claim the word ‘witch’ very intentionally. It’s a term that has been used against women for centuries. For me, a witch is an individual that believes in and practices the psychic arts and magic, and understands that we are here to be of service to the world. I’ve identified as a witch since I was sixteen. I was raised Catholic — thirteen years of Catholic school. I always kind of joke that it was training for the witch in me. It’s very ritualistic. A lot of the practices are very witch-like. Rock Bottom, Recovery & the Spiritual Path That Changed Everything Sunshine: It wasn’t until I hit my rock bottom in 2019 — admitted for the first time not just to my therapist, but to my friends and family, that I was an alcoholic — that I stepped into my path of recovery. In that path of recovery, I realized I needed something more to keep me on that path, and it needed to be anchored in my spiritual beliefs. I started to ask: what do I believe in? What practices do I have? How can I anchor myself in a spiritual practice that’s ingrained in my every single waking day? That’s where the Sober Witch came about. Sunshine: In 2017, my father was on his deathbed — from drinking. His heart was functioning at six percent. His liver and kidneys were shutting down. Watching what he had done to himself had me really questioning my relationship with alcohol. At the same time, I had a cousin — a year younger than me — who also found himself on his deathbed. I had all of these examples of what alcohol can do to the physical body. I’d been chasing relief from this addiction for a good portion of my adult life. The Honest Truth About Moderation Sunshine: Almost everyone I’ve ever talked to has tried to moderate. ‘I’m only going to drink on the weekends.’ ‘I’m only going to have two drinks.’ ‘I’ll only drink wine.’ All of these situations we create to try to keep our drinking in some kind of box. And the truth is, it may have worked for a week, two weeks, maybe even three months. But it never stuck. Grace, Shame & the Courage to Start Over Right Now Gloria: I’ve learned to just forgive myself. Give myself grace. ‘Okay, you indulged today — it’s not the end of the world.’ I had a wonderful counselor who said, ‘You can start over right now. You don’t have to wait till tomorrow. You can start at this moment and say, I’m going to make better choices right now.’ Sunshine: I love that you call out the grace — it’s so important. Carrying shame is a very strong indicator of relapse risk, because it’s a very uncomfortable emotion. Nobody enjoys feeling shame. It has the potential to lead somebody down the path of a relapse to not feel the shame. So learning how to forgive yourself, learning how to give yourself grace, is so important when it comes to recovery. And recovery from trauma too — people will find themselves in a trauma response, beating themselves up, falling back into people-pleasing patterns, starting down this path of shaming themselves. Grace is a beautiful thing. Three Steps for Anyone Ready to Change Step 1: Honor the Desire Sunshine: Good for you. Amazing. Having that want and that desire is the first thing. In a twelve-step program, they’ll say the only thing you have to do to join is have the desire to stop. Just the desire. You don’t even have to not do it. You just have to have the desire. Step 2: Be Willing to Change — All the Way Sunshine: Be willing to change. This could be changing who you associate with, how you talk to yourself, how you show up in the world, your relationships, your place of employment. Be willing to face any fears you have around change. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Step 3: Find Your Community Sunshine: Find the community you can lean into in order to do that change. They’re not going to change you or do it for you. But they will be there to support you as you navigate it — because it can be really scary to do it alone. Gloria: That’s the important thing. You start with the desire, you have to be willing — and then get support. To try to do it on your own is a recipe for frustration. It’s easier when you’ve got a community or even just one other person you can lean on. Why a Coach Can Reach Where Friends Can’t Gloria: I was working with a coach one time and she stopped me when I was talking. She said, ‘Did you hear what you just said?’ And I said, ‘What did I say?’ She repeated it back to me — I was beating myself up over something. I said, ‘Wow, I didn’t even realize it.’ That’s where having someone in your corner can be so helpful — pointing out the things we’re not even aware of. Sunshine: There is a huge benefit in working with a coach — someone that has the skill and the experience to help navigate this stuff versus just leaning on a friend. Your friends are lovely, they’re wonderful, and they’re going to be able to support you. But our friends aren’t always willing to speak up. They’re not always practiced in the art of shifting a narrative. A lot of times our friendships tend to fall into really good bitch sessions rather than coaching sessions. Finding somebody that you can trust — a coach, a mentor, a guide — can be really important when it comes to navigating any major transition or shift in life. Daily Healing Practices: From Reactive to Proactive Sunshine: I have a prayer that I wrote for myself over six years ago that I say on a daily basis. It expresses gratitude, asks for continued guidance and protection, and offers prayer for those still struggling with addiction. When we anchor ourselves into some kind of daily ritual, it allows us time to reflect. I journal every day and reflect on how my day is going. My healing isn’t reactive anymore. It’s a daily consistent habit — so if I check in and notice I’ve been really anxious, I know to monitor my sleep, my caffeine, my nutrition. I’m much more consciously aware and in tune with what’s going on daily. Gloria: My true non-negotiable is meditation. Even if it’s only ten minutes — sometimes I could do a whole hour, which is lovely — but ten minutes of being quiet, doing a little prayer, just being still, grounds me for the rest of the day. Whatever yours is, you find that one thing you can commit to, because you deserve to spend that time with yourself. And it will pay benefits down the road. Sunshine: The most important thing is finding something you enjoy and can be consistent with. If you don’t enjoy an hour of silent meditation every day, don’t force yourself. Maybe you enjoy humming and singing and saying prayer while you’re doing the dishes. Go for it. Humming and singing is actually very healthy — emotionally and physically. The Sober Witch Life Movement & The Sovereign Phoenix Sunshine: The Sovereign Phoenix is a spiritual fellowship — a 501(c)(3) religious nonprofit created to support witches in recovery. All of my programming, literature, books — everything goes into the nonprofit to offer recovery circles, spiritual development events, and community gatherings. My vision is that one day we’ll have three recovery circles available every single day, as well as a legal fund for when people’s ability to practice their spiritual faith has been threatened. People have lost jobs because of being a practicing witch. There have been challenges around custody of children. It’s not uncommon. On Designing Your Life Ahead Gloria: If you decided to redesign your life today — design your life your way — would there be anything you’d change? Sunshine: There’s one thing that has been a constant with me — change. I don’t have a fear of change. It may be uncomfortable, but I don’t fear it. If I were to fast forward five years, I really have this craving to write more. I would love to be in a place where my writing and my nonprofit work provide enough support to give me the space to just write — wherever I am. The best thing I can imagine is my partner and I down in Tennessee a couple years ago, in a beautiful little cabin overlooking the mountains. I was writing chapters of my book and editing. That’s what I’d like more of in my life. Gloria: Well, you’ve put it out there in the universe now. You’ve got that desire. You can make it happen. Closing Reflections: We All Need Community Sunshine: If people just take one thing from my message today: find the connection and the support you need in this world to navigate whatever it is. Whether it’s a strong friend group, a support group, your church, or the community you’re connected with — don’t think you have to navigate the difficulties of life alone. Gloria: And I want to say — what I love about what you’re doing is that you’re supporting other people. When you do support other people, it helps keep you on that road too, doesn’t it? Sunshine: Sure does. I tell people — I’m super selfish. I’m doing all of this for my own recovery over here! When you are able to accomplish something, share it with somebody else and help them along. Because we all need community. Even more than we have before. Show love to one another. That’s my thing.

What if the reason your business feel harder than it should right now has nothing to do with strategy and everything to do with your body? If you’re an over 50 woman who’s been pushing through exhaustion, ignoring your body’s signals, and wondering why your creativity has evaporated… this episode was made for you. In this solo edition of Design Your Life, Your Way, I get real about the undeniable connection between physical health, emotional resilience, and business success for midlife women. Drawing from my own recent season of sugar crashes, creative drought, and grief-carried back pain, I state what so many of us have normalized: depletion is not a bad of honor, and it was never part of the plan. Through my signature L.O.V.E. Method, you’ll come to see how health is not another thing to optimize, but it’s an act of self-trust, spiritual alignment, and sovereign self-love. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why your physical health is not separate from your business success — and how depletion quietly erodes your decision-making, creativity, and confidence. The three most common mistakes women over 50 make around health (and how to recognize them before your body screams instead of whispers). How the L.O.V.E. Method — Let Go, Open, Value, Embrace — applies directly to how you care for your body and honor your energy. Simple, brave next steps you can take today — not someday — to begin rebuilding your physical and creative vitality. How grief lives in the body, and why honoring what you’ve lost is sometimes the most important business decision you can make. You’ll walk away from this episode with a few honest questions to sit with, one brave step to take this week, and — if you need it most — a light language transmission to receive healing at the level where words can’t quite reach. Resources & links mentioned: Good Grief Women’s Retreat – a loving, supported space for women ready to honor what they’ve been carrying: goodgriefretreat.net Previous episode on setting boundaries: Boundaries are Self-Care: How to Stop People Pleasing in Midlife Previous episode on mindful habits: Midlife Habits That Stick: Start Small, Stay Consistent Business Coach Vicki Ibaugh’s LinkedIn profile: linkedin.com/in/vicki-ibaugh/ Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace Rand: gloriagracerand.com Take the free Personal Power Archetype Quiz to discover your unique strengths and start designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this conversation with a woman in your life who’s been running on empty. She needs to hear this. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT What If It’s Not Your Strategy? Introducing the Mind-Body-Business Connection Got a question for you today. What if the reason your business feels harder than it should has nothing to do with strategy? And what if your body has been trying to tell you something, but your mind just keeps brushing it aside? Well, today we are going to be talking about the mind, body, business connection and why your physical health may be affecting your focus, your confidence, your energy level and success more than you realize. So here’s the deal. First off, I want to welcome you to Design Your Life, Your Way. I Am Gloria Grace. And if you’re like me, if you’re a woman over 50, you know, you probably are carrying a lot, you know. Excuse me one sec. Sorry about that. Had a cough. Didn’t want to have that on camera or, well, on the audio. Anyway, as I said, if you’re like me, many women over 50 are carrying a lot. You know, especially if you’re a business owner as well. Why Women Over 50 Can’t Afford to Separate Health from Business You’re juggling all the demands of business. And then if you’ a parent or a spouse or a caregiver or you’ve got pets, you know, whatever it is, you’ve got a lot of responsibilities. And oftentimes we’ve been trained to put others first instead of focusing on our own needs. And sometimes we might tend to separate health from business even though they really are deeply connected. Because let’s face it, if success is built on depletion, your energy, your physical health, whatever, your emotional depletion, all, all of that, if you’re. That’s not true success. That’s what I’m trying to say. It’s not true success. So here’s the deal. See, you can have. You can have a beautiful mission and you can have a powerful message. But if your body is exhausted or inflamed or you’re not getting the right nourishment or you’re constantly stressed out, it just becomes so much harder to show up consistently and joyfully. And especially if you are a business owner, I’m sure that most likely you started this business because you had something to give. And especially if maybe you had a 9 to 5 job and now you pivoted and you decided to have a business. I’m sure it’s because you felt that this was a way for you to really express yourself and express joy. Gloria’s Personal Story: Grief, Back Pain & the Body’s Wisdom But when your health isn’t there, it really becomes hard to do that. And I know for me, I’ve had this happen a couple times. Once was that I can really remember. Where it really, really affected me was after my sister had passed, I started having Major back issues. I mean, and I’ve dealt with back problems since I was a teenager. And so every once in a while, it’s like my back would go out and I would have to go to a chiropractor and get myself back in alignment. Well, this time I went to a chiropractor, but it was. It still wasn’t doing any good. And even though this was my regular, you know, person, it just wasn’t working. And then I finally sought out and help from another different type of trying to remember what was her title. It was some sort of specialist, really dealing with things. And she helped me finally to. To start getting some relief. And while I was going through this, it was really hard to show up in my business because when you’re in pain, it’s tough. When Sugar Kills Creativity: A Recent Rock Bottom And sometimes it’s also not just pain that can mess us up. Sometimes it’s how we’re feeding ourselves. And I. I confess that over the last last few months now, really since, well, since November, I would say of last year, I’ve been sort of experimenting with indulging a little bit in foods that maybe aren’t the healthiest for me. And then I would kind of say, okay, now I got to go back to eating better again. And. But I wound up adding some weight back onto my body of all the lovely weight that I had taken off. And I’ve just been bouncing around. And last week was sort of my rock bottom where I’ve been eating. I had been eating sugar, and it was just really messing up my creativity. I didn’t feel like writing social media posts and I didn’t feel like engaging in, you know, with my community. And it’s just. It was just really sapped my creativity. In fact, frankly, I should have, could have, would have preferred to have recorded this podcast last week, in fact, but I just wasn’t up for it because I had this. I had the theme, this topic picked out last week, but I just wasn’t ready to do it. And now I need to get it done this week because I. Because it’s. It’s due. So it’s like. And. And what I finally did, though, this week is that I took myself in hand and I did. I did about a day and a half worth of fast just to kind of clear out some of the crap, shall we say, that I’ve been eating. And now that since I broke the fast, I’ve been eating healthy foods again and I’m feeling like myself again. And so I’m able to get this podcast episode recorded today. Because of that, in fact, I did a lot of prep work for it and coming up with a couple new things I’m going to be throwing in here today that I think is going to make the podcast even better going forward. How Your Physical Health Directly Impacts Business Performance So let’s dive in a little deeper here and why this is. It’s so important to pay attention to how, how you’re feeling emotionally, physically, mentally in order to have your business be as successful as you’d like it to be. So for one thing, your energy level really affects execution. And like I said, my energy level was like in the toilet, shall we say, recently. So, you know, if you’re tired, if you’re depleted, if you’re overstimulated, if you’re physically uncomfortable, or if you’ve been consuming too much sugar like I was, then your decision making suffers, your follow through suffers, your visibility feels heavier. Like I said, you, I wasn’t, I, I wasn’t engaging as much as I should have. And creativity drops. Physical Stress, Emotional Resilience & Why Boundaries Get Harder And then what can happen also is that then your physical stress can also affect your emotional resilience. And I don’t know if you’ve ever felt this. You know, when your nervous system gets overloaded, suddenly everything feels more urgent. Rejection feels a lot more personal too. Boundaries are harder to set up. And you know, your confidence gets shaky. And if you are having issues with boundaries, there was a previous episode, I talked about this recently. So if you need some tips on how to set up boundaries for yourself. But it’s definitely harder to set up boundaries when you’re not feeling good. Health Habits as Self-Trust: Honoring Your Body Strengthens Your Leadership And health habits shape self trust. And when we’re talking about health, I’m going to have a drink of water because I keep wanting to cough for some strange reason. So every time you honor your body, you’re reinforcing your worthiness. You know, you, you strengthen self leadership and you become more available for that aligned action. So the goal here is not to become, you don’t want to become more productive at the expense of your well being. The goal is really to become more aligned. And that’s, this is my whole thing, this is what I preach, is really the importance of this. Because when you are aligned with your purpose, when your body, your mind, your emotions are all running great, that’s when you can get into the flow and that’s what then allows you to grow your business more effectively. 3 Mistakes Women Over 50 Make Around Health (And How to Shift Them) Mistake #1: Treating Health as Optional Until Things Get Bad So I put together a couple little mistakes here. Not little mistakes, they are mistakes. So I’ve just got my notes here. I want to make sure I can, I can read them a little Bit. So here’s what. Women over 50 often get wrong, you know, not every woman over 50, but, you know, there are many, and even me. Like I said, sometimes I do this too. So. So learn from me, you know, learn from my mistakes. So if you. You want to get a piece of paper maybe and take some notes, you can come back and listen to this again. But. But yeah, pay attention to this. Okay, so mistake number one is treating health as optional until things get bad. No, no, no, no, no. Please don’t do this. Because you know what? Your body will whisper before it screams. It really will. You’ll. You know, because I know for me, it’s like sometimes I’ll get like these little. Before my back goes out. It’s like I might get this little twinge and go, oh. And when that happens, what I recommend when you do have, like, a little, you know, maybe something feels a little off is, is get curious and say, hmm, body, what are you trying to tell me? And, and really get. Get still and, and. And see if you can figure it out. See if you can say, okay, what’s going on? You know, what’s going on with me? And we’ll get, we’ll get more into that in a little bit, so stick around. Mistake #2: Thinking Burnout Is Only a Time Management Problem So that’s. That’s mistake number one. So number two is thinking that burnout is a time management issue only because actually there’s a lot more things that can go into causing burnout. Often it could be just poor sleep. You know, maybe you’re. What is it? Burning. Burning the midnight oil, as they say, and you’re staying up too late. Maybe you’re. Yeah, you know, spending too much time on social media right before you go to bed, or, you know, we’re doing too much screen time before you go to bed. That doesn’t help. You’ve got maybe some unresolved stress over maybe something that’s going on either in your business or maybe in your personal life. You’re not eating consistently. Well, as I mentioned, I was been going, you know, kind of back and forth. I’d eat well for a few days, and then maybe on the weekends I would indulge. And so, you know, being consistent is what really matters. Grief, you know, grief. Grief really can. Grief can lead to burnout when you ignore it. You know, if you, if you are pushing through, maybe you’ve gone through a. A relationship change, you know, either. Either you’ve gotten divorced or separated or, or your spouse has passed, but, you know, you’ve got to keep the business going. And so you keep going and you’re not allowing yourself time to grieve that loss, then eventually your body is going to tell you, hey, you need to stop because you need to give yourself that gift to grieve. Sometimes it can be caused by inflammation, lack of movement. And you know, if you’re not, if you’re just sitting at your desk all day and you’re not getting out, getting any exercise, that’s not, that’s a recipe for disaster. And it doesn’t have to be, you know, going to the gym for 30 minutes either. It could be something as simple as just going for a walk. And then also burnout can be caused by over giving. That’s where those boundaries come in again. You know, when you are serving from an empty cup, eventually, you know, or, or if you’re, you’re serving from, as your cup keeps depleting, depleting, you know, eventually it’s going to be empty. That’s what I really want to say and that, you know, if you keep doing for others, doing for the family, doing for your clients and not taking any time for yourself, then, yeah, you’re gonna, you’re gonna burn out and then your health can suffer. Mistake #3: Believing That Pushing Harder Is the Answer So, which leads me to mistake number three, which is very close to number two, is that believing that pushing harder is the answer, because really it’s not. And I’m just thinking, I’ve got a good friend of mine who is also a business coach. Her name is Vicki Ibaugh. Check her out. I know she’s on LinkedIn. She says these lovely Tuesday Teach me Tuesday videos. And I know she has talked about this before, about sometimes doing less actually allows you to do more. I think I’ve said this on the podcast too, but it really is amazing when you can lighten up your schedule. It creates room to breathe, It’s so much nicer when you can just take that break, when you can maybe cut a few things out of your schedule instead, because it really does. It just gives your brain space to come up with ideas. It really does. It’s so much better. Reconnecting with Your Body Through the L.O.V.E. Method So I want you to think about this. That so many women have really learned to disconnect from their bodies to survive, but thriving both in life and in business really asks for reconnection. So I want to invite you to look at this from the love lens. Now for those of you who may be new to design your life to the podcast or don’t know about me. Love is an acronym and so it’s something I’ll call the love method, something I wrote about in my book. L — Let Go and Let God: Releasing Beliefs About Productivity and Worth And the L in love stands for let go and let God. So what I invite you to do is to think about what beliefs do you have right now that you need to release around this idea of productivity and self worth or even pushing through. So, you know, maybe it, maybe you have a belief that, that maybe even isn’t it yours? You know, sometimes these are beliefs that we’ve picked up in childhood, you know, like rest is lazy, you know, or more than even that is that you need to work hard for your money. Right? Yeah, you need to work hard for your money. Well, maybe not. Maybe you need to work smarter for the money instead. Maybe it’s looking at reframing something around. I have to earn the right to slow down because again, we live in this hustle culture of ours that feels that, you know, you’ve gotta, you gotta compete and you’ve gotta just go, go, go all the time. So maybe think about really taking a look at that and asking yourself, is that really what I want to believe? Maybe yes, maybe no. Now the O in love stands for open your heart to receive. O — Open Your Heart to Receive: Asking for Support, Rest & Nourishment So this could be where you spend some time asking yourself, how can I receive support? How can I ask for and then open myself up to rest or to receive better nourishment? And maybe it means getting buy in from the people that you live with. Perhaps again, going back to those boundaries, check out that episode. I’ll have the link to that in the show notes. I think that’ll be helpful for you, I’m sure. So I’ll put a link to that in the show notes because when you can set boundaries, that is a really good way to be able to help you to get that support and the rest and nourishment that you need. V — Value Your Uniqueness: Honoring Your Body’s Own Rhythms And the V, this is one of my favorites is value your uniqueness. So this really is about learning to honor your body’s own rhythms. Because there are some people, for example, there are some people who like to get up early in the morning and do their most creative work or maybe the things that they need to get done then. And then there are people who are night owls and they like to stay up late and do stuff. So figure out, you know, who are you, who are you, how are you? How are you wired? You know, when do you best function and honor that? Because if you are Someone who works best in the morning, but you find yourself staying up too late trying to get stuff done. That’s not a good recipe and that’s probably when you’re going to wind up burning out. So instead, make sure that you are tackling like maybe either the most time consuming projects or the things that take the most brain power. Yeah, I guess, you know, make sure that you’re doing those at the time when your body is. It’s. It’s most conducive. Yes, I think. I think that’s the word I’m looking for for your body. So make sure that you’re doing that. Honor yourself, not somebody else’s idea of how you’re supposed to get stuff done. E — Embrace Your Divinity: Your Body Is Not Separate from Your Spirit And then the E in love stands for embrace your divinity. So this is really acknowledging that your body is not separate from your spirit and when you care for it, that is an act of self love. And now this is my belief. I believe that we are all spiritual beings living a human existence and that we are all divine. So consider that. And I know some people have that word divinity conjures specific religious ideas. But if that speaks to you, fine. But if not, just figure out another way to maybe you connect to nature. So embrace your humanness then and really honor that. That we’re not machines, even though AI is threatening to take us over. Don’t let it. I’m reading an interesting book right now as an aside here, but I. I don’t have the title of it off my hand. Oh, I think it’s about. No, I don’t want to say it’s the New Human, but something. Anyway, I’m going to talk about it on a future episode once I finish it. So I’m not done with it yet, but anyway. All right. Okay. I’m going to honor my body’s health and take another sip of water here for a second. Your Next Brave Step: Practical Ways to Begin Rebuilding Your Vitality Okay. All right. So what could be your next brave step to take this week? Hopefully, hopefully you’ve come to see that really taking care of your. Taking care of your physical health is important to have all parts of your life work more smoothly. So you could start by noticing one physical signal that you’ve possibly been ignoring. So perhaps ask yourself, where am I tired? What hurts? When do I feel most drained? What am I using to numb instead of nourish? And it could be anything from food. In my case, could be alcohol. Maybe it’s social media, maybe it’s binging on Netflix. You know, if you find yourself spending too much time doing those things, you know, maybe that’s something to start paying attention to. And then when you do choose one health supporting habit to start doing today, not even this week, but just start doing it today. And again, it’s another thing I’ve talked about in a recent episode where we talked about mindful habits. So it could be something simple like maybe starting to go to bed. You might want to start going to bed 30 minutes earlier, but I’ve read where it’s good to work up to that. So maybe you start by just going to bed 10 minutes earlier and then 20 minutes and then 30 minutes. But our bodies don’t always like those kind of abrupt changes because if you suddenly go to bed 30 minutes earlier, your brain is probably still on like, no, I’m still working, this isn’t bedtime. So it’s important to gradually, gradually move into that. Maybe it’s starting to go for a walk and instead not go for walk for a mile, but start with a 10 minute walk and do that every day for a week. And then the next week you can do 20 minutes and build up. I’m going to be doing that because I’m going to start training soon to do a 10k race and then a half marathon this fall. So I’m going to have to start working up to that. I’m not going to go out and try to do six miles when I haven’t done that in a very long time, certainly not running it. It’s not going to happen. I have to work up to it gradually, get the muscles used to it. Maybe it is, you know, drink more water like I’m doing. Or maybe, maybe you’ve been putting off that physical exam at the doctors, you might want to consider scheduling that and pause before doom scrolling. That would be a good thing to do too. And then finally, whatever you decide to do, whatever habit you set up, tie that to your business purpose. So if you decide to go for a walk, for example, you know you’re not just taking the walk for your body, you’re taking it so that you can think clearly and speak powerfully and replenish your cup so that you’re serving from a full cup again. When What You’re Carrying Is Grief: The Good Grief Women’s Retreat Now, sometimes the next brave step isn’t doing more on your own, though sometimes it’s letting yourself be held. And if what’s been coming up for you today during this episode feels different, deeper than stress or fatigue, if it feels like grief, I want to gently let you know that registration is closing soon for my upcoming Good Grief women’s retreat. And because as I mentioned when I was sharing at the beginning of the episode today, if you came in late and go back in and watch it or listen to it, Grief affects more than your emotions. It can really impact your energy, your nervous system, your focus, your body, frankly. I mean, I really believe that the back problems I was having because I hadn’t bent any weird way or picked up something overly heavy, it was grief. I was carrying it in my back. So this retreat that we’re offering, and it’s not just me, I’ve got a couple other lovely ladies who are joining me. It’s a loving, supportive space for women who are ready to honor what they’ve been carrying and allow healing to begin in a deeper way. So if that speaks to you, I’d love for you to learn more about it. I’ll have the link to that in the show, in the show notes. Light Language Transmission: Releasing Stress, Reconnecting with Your Body’s Wisdom And with that, I think what I also want to do today is move us into a light language transmission. Because this is something that I like to share on these episodes and especially because sometimes what grief, stress, or exhaustion need most is not more figuring out, but more receiving. So, see, you can get to practice the O and open your heart to receive right now. And light language is one of the healing modalities I’m going to be offering at the Good Grief retreat, too. So this is my invitation to you now to simply breathe, to soften and. And receive. And what I’m going to do is I’m setting an intention that what you’re going to hear today will support you in releasing stress, to reconnect with your body’s innate wisdom and open you up to greater vitality, clarity, and aligned success. So if. If you’re listening to this right now, where you are driving a car, I would encourage you to pause and come back because it’s better to receive this transmission when you can be just in a nice quiet place, maybe even put some headphones on so that you’re not disturbed and just allow whatever comes through. You know, I may, I may speak, I may sing. Allow it to speak to your heart, because it’s not going to be necessarily anything that your mind is going to be able to translate. Sometimes it’s possible, but I’m not promising that. Okay? So I’m presuming that if you were driving, you’ve, you’ve. You’ve taken a break and now you’re ready to hear this. So just take a breath, get grounded. If you want, you can even close your eyes and just allow the message to come through for you today. Whatever ultimately I ask that whatever comes through is for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. [Light Language Transmission] I invite you right now to just notice what you feel. Closing: Your Body Is the Path — Honor It See, did anything maybe soften or open up for you or come into your awareness as well, because. Your body is not in the way, it might even be showing you a path toward a more loving and sustainable way of living and working. So honor that. Honor that, you know, we’ve been given these tremendous, tremendous bodies. I mean, if you think about it, and in fact, I was just remembering something actually. This is kind of, kind of good. I was watching an episode of the Madison the other night, and one of the characters was talking about that she’s so glad that breathing is automatic because the emotions that she was feeling at the time, if it wasn’t, she might forget to breathe. And isn’t that amazing that our breathing comes automatically? And we can also choose sometimes how we want to breathe. You know, sometimes when you are stressed, you tend to breathe from your chest and you can, you know, it can get tight, but when you’re relaxed and you can make an effort to breathe from the diaphragm, from, you know, below in your belly, and really take those deep breaths out and then inhale, it’s so much better for you. So much. So when you honor your physical health, you don’t just feel better. You also can lead, decide, and serve from a more aligned place. I hope, I hope this really spoke to you today. And yeah, I really hope it did, and that you are. You’re gonna take care of yourself. Because you know what? There’s only one you in this whole amazing world. That’s why it’s so important to value your uniqueness. You’re the only one of you. Even if you have an identical twin, if you’re a wonderful person out there who is lucky enough to have that, you know, you and your identical twin are still not identical because you all have. You each have your own thoughts, you each have your own feelings, and that’s great. So, yeah, I just. Just take care of yourself. And especially if you do. If you are a business owner, you know, your. Your clients depend on you, your customers depend on you, your employees depend on you. And if you’re not taking care of yourself and then you get, you know, something happens then that’s going to affect your business. So I want you to be successful in all aspects of your life so that you can design your life your way. And being healthy is going to help you to do that. So I hope you will join us next week where I’ll be sharing more tips on how to design your life your way. And. And until then, just remember that your life is asking to be lived more fully. So allow that to happen. Namaste.

What if the silence you’ve been avoiding in midlife is the very thing that could set you free? Laurie Jacobson spent years trying everything to find her way out of pain until 22 days of silence at a Buddhist monastery gave her what counseling and alternative modalities couldn’t: her own self back. If you’ve ever felt like you were carrying something so heavy that it had become part of you, this conversation could be the thing you’ve been looking for. I sit down with author and health coach Laurie Jacobson who shares her journey to escape an emotionally abusive marriage led her to a Buddhist monastery and the inner freedom to finally walk away. Together, we explore what it really means to design your life on your own terms, especially in your 50s and beyond. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why the biggest hurdle women face after 50 isn’t age; it’s learning to embrace it as a new beginning rather than an ending. How a 22-day silent retreat cracked open one woman’s heart and gave her the courage to leave an emotionally abusive marriage. The unexpected gift of impermanence: how meditation teaches us that pain, even the deepest kind, will pass. Why “on and off” is still a meditation practice, and why 5 minutes of stillness can be just as powerful as an hour on the cushion. The healing triad of self-compassion, forgiveness, and acceptance — and how to begin practicing each one today. What it means to become a non-judgmental observer of your own life, and why that inner spaciousness is pure freedom. How stepping outside your comfort zone isn’t recklessness; it’s the path to becoming who you’re meant to be. Whether you’ve never meditated a day in your life or you’re an on-again, off-again practitioner looking for permission to just begin again, this episode will meet you exactly where you are. About My Guest Laurie S. Jacobson is a writer, certified health coach, and the author of Unexpected Awakening: 22 Days at a Buddhist Monastery Freed Me from Abuse. Fascinated by the Buddha’s teachings, she has channeled her lived experience of healing and resilience into health education programs, a monthly wellness column, and a book that is as much a love letter to suffering women as it is a testament to the transformative power of stillness. Her work is grounded in one simple truth: there is always a way through. Connect with Laurie: Website: lauriesjacobson.com Book: Unexpected Awakening — available on her website or Amazon Resources & links mentioned: Holosync – binaural beat meditation audio program available from Centerpointe.com Vipassana meditation — insight meditation practice taught at Theravada Buddhist monasteries Gene Keys – transformational system for shadow work and inner integration Building Your House of Health — Lori’s free 24-page wellness guide (available at lauriesjacobson.com) Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about the Good Grief Retreat — a sacred space to process loss and rediscover yourself: goodgriefretreat.net Discover your unique gifts as a midlife entrepreneur with my free Personal Power Archetype Quiz: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating grief, transition, or the beautiful (and sometimes messy) work of reinventing herself after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Introducing Laurie Jacobson: Meditation, Healing & Midlife Reinvention Gloria Grace: Namaste. I am a big, big lover of meditation, and I really do believe it is a really powerful tool to use, especially when you want to design your life your way. And that’s why I’m excited to talk with today’s guest, who I believe feels the same way. We’ll get into that, but I think so. My hunch is that. So her name is Lori Jacobson, and she is a writer and on and off meditator. So I am going to ask her about that, but that’s what her bio said. She’s also a certified health coach, and she is fascinated by the Buddha’s teachings. She has authored a monthly wellness column for the publication Our Town. She created and facilitated the healthy living program for Somerset Hospital and developed and hosted the segment Cooking for Health on WJAC TV. And what also really connected me with her is that she’s the author of a book called Unexpected Awakening: 22 Days at a Buddhist Monastery Freed Me from Abuse. So, without further ado, we’re gonna get into all of that, I think, in just a second. So let me welcome you, Lori, to our show. So welcome. So glad you’re here. Laurie: Thank you. Thanks for inviting me. The Biggest Hurdle Women Over 50 Face When Designing Life on Their Terms Gloria Grace: Well, I think I want to jump right in, focusing in on our audience, and then we’re kind of gonna back in and get into a little bit more of your story, but your answer might even fall into this. So what I wanted to ask you is what do you think is the biggest hurdle that women over 50 face when it comes to living life on their terms? Laurie: Wow. I think the biggest hurdle is embracing your age, for one thing. Now we’re entering a new chapter of our lives. It can — well, and it is different than youth when you’re finding yourself and having fun and exploring, and that’s one phase. And then perhaps you’ll get married or have a lifelong partner, and that enters into more responsibilities, you know, plus whatever work you’re doing, kids come into the picture, and then by age 50, you’re almost like, well, I’m getting close to retirement. Maybe the kids are out of the house, and, you know, what next? What’s next? Or you’re looking for — I mean, I’m retired right now, so that was a big, you know, hurdle for me. Like, what do I do now with my life? And then you realize, you know, you have freedom to, as you say, design your own life. You know, what am I when I get up in the morning? What’s my mission? What gets me out of bed? And a lot of times it’s really tough to find that purpose, that sense of purpose, and takes a little reflection and, you know, inner work to see, you know, well, what brings me joy, what brings me pleasure, and how can I structure my life, my new life around that? Staying Open to Change: When Your Purpose Evolves After 50 Gloria Grace: I appreciate that answer because, yeah, it is. It can be challenging. And I think one thing I also want to just let our audience know, too, because I’ve experienced this myself, is that that purpose can change. You know, it could, you know, at any time. It’s like — it just doesn’t matter. So just be aware and be open to that, and know that that’s also — I think the beauty of this time of life is that we can. Okay, yeah, this was — I thought that idea was going to pan out, but you know what? Maybe I’ll go in this direction instead. Laurie: Yeah. Because it either no longer serves you or — but you mentioned the big word, you know, change. I mean, you know, life has changed. Everything changes. And we — and the other big word you said was being open to it, for sure, not pushing it away. If change is going to happen and we can embrace that — yeah, absolutely. It’s not always pleasant, but I always hold on to the mantra, this too shall pass. This too shall pass. And I’ve had to do that this week. This week was not the most pleasant of weeks for me, and thankfully it passed. So I’m just in time for this interview today, so perfect timing. Writing Unexpected Awakening: A 20-Year Journey to Publishing Her Story Gloria Grace: So I want to go back because I was doing a lot of reading about you and all the different things that you’ve been doing. Now, I guess I want to figure out — and if you can maybe give me the timeline on here, because you wrote this book, I guess, recently, right? Within the last year or two? Laurie: Well, I’ve actually been writing this book for 20 years. Oh, okay. Published recently? Yes, I published it last March. But it’s been a long process of fits and starts because the incident that I’m writing about was just a portion of my 42nd year on this planet. So when I was 42 years old, I took this slot of what happened to me. And now I’ll just say I’m in my early 60s. But it took me that long to — and you know what, sometimes I think that was a good thing because it gave me more perspective looking back and seeing it a little with different eyes. 22 Days at a Buddhist Monastery: What Led Lori to Seek Healing in Silence Gloria Grace: Yeah. So the title of the book, or the subtitle I should say, is 22 Days at a Buddhist Monastery. So as someone who did a 10-day silent retreat — I don’t know if yours was silent or not, but let’s start. I’m really curious about that. So what prompted you to spend 22 days at a Buddhist monastery? What in your life caused you to do that? Laurie: Well, as I explained in the book, I mean, I was in a very abusive marriage. I was at the lowest point in my life ever. And I tried a lot of different things to help me feel better, to get me unstuck, to lift me out of depression. I tried so many different conventional and alternative therapies. Nothing worked. And I was always interested in the Buddha’s teachings and I was always interested in meditation. And I found out about this monastery that was only about a 3½ to 4 hour drive away from where I was living at the time. I was living up in the mountains of Pennsylvania, very isolated, which made it even more difficult being in that abusive relationship. But, you know, I just thought, I got to do something, why not try this? Snowed In at the Monastery: When an Unexpected Storm Becomes a Blessing Lori: And it was a silent retreat. And the initial retreat was only supposed to last about a week. But what was really cool and ended up being a blessing was we got snowed in. I’m out in the mountains of West Virginia in this monastery. And they told us a snowstorm was coming about halfway through the retreat. And they said, well, if you really have to be someplace, you better leave now because we don’t know when you’re going to be able to get out. And I just, things were starting to happen for me and I just said, I’m sticking put, I am staying. I want to see this thing through. So I stayed throughout the snowstorm. We all manned the snow shovels and eventually the plows reached us. But that retreat with the snowstorm was only about 15 days, but a fantastic transformation happened at that point and I thought I could go home and everything would be all right. But I certainly discovered it shortly — discovered it wasn’t all right. And then I just was drawn back to the monastery a second time for a second retreat. So all told, the total time I was there before I really was able to free myself was 22 days total. Inside a Silent Meditation Retreat: Structure, Rules & Small Acts of Grace Gloria Grace: Well, let me ask you because the one I attended — it was a silent retreat. You did have an opportunity where you could once a day talk to some of the leaders if you really needed to. And I had met a woman that very first day, and she was like, I don’t know if I’m going to make it. And she took advantage of that being able to speak every day. She went out like after lunch and talked to them. And they also said not to journal. So it was really just spending time with your own thoughts for that entire time, you know, doing a lot of meditating, but also then just quiet time, you know, either in your room or walking around. Was it a similar situation for you? Was it that they really encouraged you to just be alone with your thoughts? Laurie: Well, certainly, you know, the silent retreat does induce that for sure. They did have optional interviews. You could sign up for an optional interview with the monks. One of the monks, yeah. And you know, if you felt like you had a question or you needed to talk to them. So I did sign up a couple of times for an optional interview. Yeah. And in terms of taking notes, yes, you were discouraged to take notes. But when I was back in my room and I had something really big come up, I would just jot — I had, I cheated, if you want to call it that. I don’t know, whatever you want to call it. But I did. Or if I had a question, you know, I remember in the book, I wrote down I had a lot of fear coming up. Oh my God. When I first got there, I had all this fear coming up. So I might have written down like fear in big letters with a question mark or when the monks gave a talk every evening — if something in their talk that resonated with me, I might jot that down. It was just sort of bullet points just for my own self improvement or understanding. So I did that. And the only other time you were allowed to talk was — we always had to sign up for a chore to do. Had a job and my job — I had two jobs, but one job I had to coordinate with somebody else so you could sort of talk to them. And one time I was helping in the kitchen, so of course you had to talk to the cook. Gloria Grace: I’m one of these people — I was really a stickler for the rules. And so I was like, okay, remember this when you get home. Remember this when you get home. Because this was a moment. And I think that did help me out. But yeah, I could have probably skirted by. They weren’t going to throw you out. The Transformation: Bliss, Insight & Becoming a Non-Judgmental Observer Gloria Grace: So what was it about this experience that really kind of spoke to you? Laurie: Well, these things just started happening to me and I couldn’t explain them and they were very deeply profound, either insights or — I also had visions and I knew they meant something. And at one point it was just so blissful. I had these insights that caused so much bliss that I mean, you just want it to last forever because you get to this point if you meditate enough — and I’m not saying this will happen to everybody. I was just so lucky it happened to me — was that you get so entrenched in the present moment and paying attention that you become this non-judgmental observer. And it’s so freeing and so wonderful because you’re just watching things happen but you’re not attaching any judgment to them. So it’s just this wonderful, free — you’re almost freed from your own ego or your own self story in a sense. And that was something that you want to hold on to. And of course, the Buddha says you shouldn’t be grasping at anything, but, you know, you do want to hold on to it. Just like, you know, when you go home, you’re in this beautiful, blissful place of clarity and tranquility, and you just want to hold on to it. But you can’t because you’re back in the real world and you have the real world responsibilities and stresses and fast pace — and that’s why it’s important to try to at least keep up with your meditation practice. The On-and-Off Meditator: Releasing Perfectionism Around Your Practice Gloria Grace: Well, that brings me to my next question, though, because in your bio that you sent me, it said on and off meditator. So what’s the story behind that? Laurie: Well, I tend to be pretty hard on myself. My husband keeps saying, why are you beating yourself up so much? You know, I think a lot of us do that. You know, we think, oh, I should be doing this, or I should be getting this done, or I didn’t cross this off my to-do list. And we beat ourselves up. And, you know, although I know the value of meditation and I’ve been there and I’ve experienced very lengthy meditation centers — and that includes sitting meditation and walking meditation — like, anything less than that, I tend to get on my case that I’m not doing it. Or, you know, even if I don’t do it on a regular basis, I’ll — I can’t claim that I am a meditator because to me, a meditator, it’s like you get up every morning and you meditate every day and nothing stops you. And I’m — I can’t say that I’m there. I’m not. But I am so pulled to it, especially during times when, you know, that little internal voice tells you you need to sit and be quiet and watch your breath. And that’s really meditation in a nutshell. Sit, be quiet, and watch your breath. And, you know, it’s like people make it to be so much more complicated than that. Making Meditation a Non-Negotiable: How Even 5 Minutes Can Ground You Gloria Grace: Absolutely. Yeah. And I like to say — because I’ve been meditating since 2009, and I’ve gone through lots of different ways to meditate — it just, you know, I may spend one year or more years doing it a certain way. And actually for a long time I was using a program called Holosync that I would listen to and I did that for years and years. And then I probably got bored of it and tried to figure out some other way to do it. And then I did this Vipassana-style meditation when I did the retreat. I did that for a while, and then now I’ve just decided that for me meditation is my non-negotiable. But it doesn’t mean I would — I love sitting for like a half an hour or an hour even sometimes meditating, but that’s not practical every day. So I will spend at least 10 or 15 minutes, you know, or maybe even only five minutes. Especially if I’m like maybe I had to go on an airplane, I’ve got to fly somewhere and it’s like I gotta leave early in the morning, gotta drive to the airport for an hour. It’s like, okay, I’ll do five minutes, let me just at least do five minutes. And I can, and that’s it. And I can just be sitting, just sitting still. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. Laurie: And I love that you mentioned walking meditation too because that is a lovely way to be able to just be still, be quiet with your thoughts and be out in nature, which is also wonderful. Yes. And it’s — we actually practiced it in the meditation hall. And you know, it’s a great way to just practice present moment awareness too because if you really focus on, you know, lifting your leg, placing your heel down, placing your toe down, shifting your weight very slowly. I had an experience, and I put this in the book, where while I was doing this walking meditation, all of a sudden I had no sense of time. Time just disappeared. It could have been 6 o’clock in the morning, 11 o’clock at night. Summer, winter, fall, I had no idea. And it was the most wonderful, pleasant feeling in the world to not even know what time it was or what season it was. Because I was just so involved in the movements of my body that everything else disappeared. And that was really cool. Gloria Grace: Oh yeah, definitely. Yeah. And I love those times when I’ve meditated sometimes that I think it’s only been a few minutes and it was a lot longer, or sometimes I thought it was a lot longer and then it was only a few minutes. So it’s a really cool thing. Laurie: It is. And you know, one of the lessons I remember learning from the monks is like, well, in books you’ll learn this from too, is that meditation is going to be different every time and have no expectations and don’t feel as though — try and say, oh, that was a good meditation session or that was a bad meditation session and oh, I’m not making progress because I didn’t reach that like pleasant space. It’s just all a practice. It’s just, remember it’s just a practice. And I commend you for it being non-negotiable even five minutes. It can be so grounding and restorative and wonderful. Gloria Grace: Yeah, yeah. I’ve only had — well, thank you. And I’ve only had this one moment of pure bliss. And it was during that Vipassana meditation and after I’d been sitting there for, you know, two hours and it was like all of a sudden it was, yeah, it was like bliss. And it lasted three, three or four seconds, you know. It’s like — I said, you know, it did not last long and it was like, oh, wow, okay, that was cool. Yeah. Laurie: All right. Can’t attach to it. But boy, it was really nice while it lasted. Yeah. And you know, I would encourage people, you know, to certainly have a little basic meditation practice at home. But you know, if you want to go deeper, if you can go on a retreat and see — because that’s going to afford you the time to do these longer silent meditations. And you know, but I would also caution, you know, don’t go in with expectations. Don’t go in chasing bliss. Yeah, chasing anything. But the nice thing about the Vipassana meditation, which is the type of meditation that they practiced at this monastery — this was a Theravada Buddhist monastery — is that, you know, sure, you’ll have maybe some blissful moments, but you’ll also gain insights. And I had a couple of very profound insights that — those can last. I mean, those are lasting, you know, feelings, impressions, perspectives that you can have forever. And that was a big turning point for me, is having these insights. And that you can gain that from longer meditation sessions. Yeah. Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. And one of the things that I found, which is the reason why I keep up my meditation practice, is that I get wonderful insights or ideas for things. I mean, the idea to write my book came while I was meditating. So that’s one of the reasons why I keep it up because you never know when something’s going to pop into your head, and it’s a really worthwhile practice. So I encourage everyone to at least explore it, you know, and try different things — and know you don’t have to stick with the same thing. Lori: Yeah, yeah. I mean, try different types of meditation. See what resonates with you. But I will say also that, you know, there are people that approach meditation strictly for stress relief. Fine. And that’s perfectly fine. But, you know, if you do want to go deeper, you can, you know, to gain these insights or, as your program says, can change your life. You can have these insights that have a profound effect on you that make you make a decision that maybe you wouldn’t have made before you had that insight. Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone: The Path to a Life You Actually Want Gloria Grace: Absolutely. Which brings me back to the other point — I’ve talked about this on the podcast before, but I would love to get your perspective. What is the importance of stepping outside of your comfort zone for you? Laurie: In my life, it’s just almost something you have to do if you want to get someplace else. We can hum along, hum along and do the same old things and enjoy our life. And I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that. But if you’re struggling or if you’re uncomfortable or if you’re seeking something more, it usually involves — or if you’re trying to just follow your heart, it usually involves stepping outside your comfort zone to get to a place you haven’t been before. And, you know, it can be scary and it can be frightening. I mean, it certainly was for me. You have to have a bit of courage, and you got to have courage to break out of any uncomfortable situation. And you have to be willing to, as you said, be open and try something new. I mean, when I was struggling in that abusive marriage, I mean, I just was trying all these things — I was so desperate to feel better. And I did Reiki, I did acupuncture, I did some counseling. I didn’t really want to do medication. Like, everybody kept pushing me to do that, but this was back in the day when they didn’t really know a whole lot about the effects of certain medications. But, you know, you have to keep putting out the effort to get to where you want to be, and that usually includes doing something different. And you just gotta say okay. You know, I can do this and find that courage. And eventually that led to me, you know, leaving this terribly abusive man and being able to say goodbye. I’m not doing this anymore. Recognizing Emotional Abuse: Why It’s Hard to Leave and How to Find the Courage Laurie: Because I don’t think, you know, people realize who haven’t been in toxic relationships, how stuck you can get and how difficult it is to extricate yourself from that situation. I know that’s a whole other topic. We don’t have to get into that. But I just want to mention that when I talk to other women and I mentioned that I was in a toxic relationship, nine out of ten of them say I relate to that. I’ve experienced that as well. Really sad, sad fact. Gloria Grace: Yeah, that’s true. And I’ll just say this because I don’t necessarily need you to go into details, but it can be — there’s all different kinds of abuse, too. There’s, you know, there can be physical abuse, for sure. You definitely need to try to get out of that as quickly as you possibly can. But there’s also mental and emotional abuse, and that can be a little more sticky because — I know, for me, I sort of grew up with that and so then didn’t realize that. Laurie: Okay. I don’t even really want to be that hard on my husband, who I don’t live with — wasn’t exactly abuse, but it wasn’t respectful. Yeah. Yeah, in a lot of ways. And, you know, that’s why, you know, I love him. Good guy overall. And I know why I married him because he was very similar to the mother that I grew up with. And so that’s why — why do we do that? I know. Well, it’s these lessons, you know, I did it too, until we learn them. Right. First time around is learning. Second time around is like, yeah, I know. I don’t want that. Gloria Grace: So was there — I know for me there came a point where a coach told me, you will know. There will come a time when you know it’s time to make a change. Was there something like that, similar for you, where you’re like, okay, this is it? You know, the old movie Network. You know, I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore. Was there that kind of — Laurie: I would say that to myself every day. I would say that. I would say, I can’t do this anymore. I’d be crying on my bed. I can’t do this anymore. At one point I did initiate divorce papers. But then, you know, he comes to you, oh, give me another chance. I love you so much. I’m going to treat you like a queen. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, you know, and you fall for it. But it, you know, it definitely — I mean, the overall category of abuse is emotional abuse. I mean, it’s, you know, everything falls under that. And that’s mostly — thank God I didn’t really have physical abuse, but I had terrible emotional and verbal abuse. And that will wear down your soul, your spirit, your self-esteem. Everything that makes you, you is gone. I mean, it just disappears. And so it makes it very, very tough to regain that and to be able to get to that level where you can make the decision to leave because you’ve been so worn down by, you know, this man who pretty much criticizes you every day, tries to control and manipulate you. And we as women, you know, initially, if we don’t recognize it and deal with it initially when we start to see the red flag, we can get really sucked in and it’s harder and harder to leave at that point. How Meditation Became the Key That Unlocked the Door to Freedom Gloria Grace: So do you think the meditation work that you did — do you think that was helpful then in being able for you to finally say, okay, I’m going through with this this time. I know I’ve wanted the divorce. Now I’m definitely going to do it. Laurie: It was the key. It was the key that unlocked the prison doors. What I say in the book — and what it did — it was through everything I gained from the meditation. It’s so funny, I just never realized this until now, but it wasn’t the meditation itself. It was what the meditation did for me. And that was open my heart, made it filled with loving kindness and compassion, gave me insights into the nature of impermanence, which was instrumental in me being able to let go of this. And I do explain it better in the book, but it’s everything that meditation gave me that was the catalyst to me being able to go home in this soul and spirit of loving kindness and bliss and compassion and self-awareness and clarity, be able to look at him in the eyes, not be triggered by him at all and say, you poor dear man, I know you’re suffering and you’re just gonna have to get over me. And he knew — he could tell he didn’t have control over me. The spell was broken and the jig was up, you know. Yeah. And I drove him to the bus stop a couple days later and that was that. Self-Compassion and Forgiveness: The Healing Work That Changes Everything Gloria Grace: And I think what I’m hearing you say — and correct me if I’m wrong — yes, definitely compassion for him, but ultimately compassion for yourself. I think that’s really what meditation is great for, is opening yourself up to learning how to love yourself and to love yourself enough to start taking care of yourself. Laurie: Absolutely. And when I said compassion, that included self-compassion. And another key besides that was forgiveness for me. I was finally able to forgive myself for putting up with all of that. And, you know, it’s like when you — that was a big part of the retreat too. They talked a lot about forgiveness and, you know, forgiving others, but also forgiving yourself. It always comes back, you know, to yourself. And that was very helpful as well. Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. And yeah, well, this is what I take away from it, you know, and people ask, you know, oh, well, you know, if you had your life to live over again, would you do the same things? And it’s like, sure, there’s probably some things I’d change, but at the same time it’s like, well, no — it was painful to go through some of these things, but they did allow me to survive to where I am now. Allowed me to write a book. Laurie: Allowed you to write a book. And hopefully your book is inspiring others. That is my greatest wish. That is my greatest wish in writing this book — to support and inspire others, to let them know the wonderful benefits of meditation and that there is a way out of suffering, whether it’s in a toxic relationship or anything else. And, you know, in terms of going through painful times, it almost is integral to your growth because it’s going to — you’re going to learn something. Hopefully it’ll make you a stronger, better person. And, you know, if we only had pleasure in our life and we never knew pain, that wouldn’t be a very fun life, you know. Impermanence, Acceptance & the Wisdom of ‘This Too Shall Pass’ Gloria Grace: So we can, you know — it just really will hinge on, you know, your attitude and your mindfulness and your mental perspective on the pain. You know, like you say, the pain will pass because everything passes. I mean, everything — like, you know, I’m in. I study something called the Gene Keys and going through a retreat, online retreat right now. And their big thing they’ve been talking about is allow, accept and embrace. And it is specifically about allowing these — you know, the parts of our lives that — or the parts of ourselves even — that, you know, the shadow sides or, you know, parts that you maybe not always are thrilled with. But as you say, you know, just kind of allow and make peace with it. Laurie: You’re absolutely right, because when you accept — and that way you don’t struggle against it because the struggle is what’s going to create more emotional pain for you. So, so, you know, the acceptance is so important and — oh, my God, if you can get to embrace, you’re doing really well. Gloria Grace: Yeah, I know. Yeah, exactly. That’s definitely the highest. The highest part. And yeah, I’m still working my way towards there. Laurie: We’re all a work in progress, you know? Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. One Message for Women Over 50: Be Brave, Think Out of the Box, Love Fully Gloria Grace: If the women out there listening to this today or watching could take just one thing from your message today, what do you hope it is? Laurie: Wow. What’s my one message? Be who you are. Don’t be afraid. You know, think out of the box. On my website, I just — my little something after my logo is be brave. Think out of the box and love with all your heart. Gloria Grace: Wise words. I like that. Very good. Very amazing. Connect with Laurie Jacobson & Free Wellness Resources Gloria Grace: And that also is a good segue. So what is your website? So people want to be able to learn more about you? Laurie: Sure. My website is basically my name. It’s Laurie S. Jacobson. S stands for my middle name. So it’s www.lauriesjacobson.com. You’ll find information about me, about my health coaching, about my book. There’ll be links to buy my book on Amazon or buy directly from me. I also have a blog. You can check out my blog posts on my website. And if you’d like to sign up for my monthly newsletter — I don’t bombard people with emails, just once a month I try to send out a little newsletter — if you sign up for that on the website, I’ll send you my free 24-page guide to health. And it’s called Building Your House of Health. Gloria Grace: All right, excellent. Well, I’ll have that in the show notes, and then also, so make sure if you’re listening to this that you do check out the show notes, especially for the correct spelling of Lori’s name because, you know, that’s one of those names that you can spell lots of different ways. So she spells it L-A-U-R-I-E and then the letter S and then Jacobson, and that’s S-O-N. So just at the end, because again, there’s lots of ways people can spell things. So thank you for that. Laurie: That’s so true. Gloria Grace: Well, I really do appreciate you being with us today and sharing your experience of meditation. Hopefully we’ve inspired some folks. At least think about it if you haven’t started a practice. And again, remember, it’s a practice. So, you know, the only way to get to Carnegie Hall was to practice, practice. So no pressure. Just practice, you know. Laurie: Gloria, thank you so much for having me. It’s been my pleasure. Gloria Grace: And I do want to thank all of you for watching and for listening today. And I really do hope that you got as much value out of our conversation as I did. And I will be back next week with more ideas on how you can make this chatper of your life the best one yet!

If you’ve ever felt lonely in a room full of people — or quietly wondered why connection feels harder to find the older you get — this episode is your permission slip to stop waiting and start reaching out. The sad truth is that loneliness among women over 50 is more common than most of us want to admit, and more complex than simply being alone. This week, I get vulnerable and share my own experience with loneliness, from the silence that followed my sister’s passing to the unexpected friendships that bloomed at a podcasting conference. I explore why midlife transitions like divorce, empty nesting, and career changes can quietly shrink your circle — and what you can actually do about it. You’ll walk away with practical, soulful strategies for finding your people, creating community when none exists, and remembering that even in your loneliest moments, you are never truly alone. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why one in three adults between 50 and 80 report feeling lonely — and why women are especially affected The important distinction between being alone and feeling lonely (and why understanding this changes everything) How major midlife transitions — divorce, empty nesting, loss, career changes — can quietly erode your sense of community without you even realizing it Practical ways to find your people, from conferences and retreats to Meetup groups and women’s circles Why sometimes the boldest, most loving thing you can do is create the community you’ve been looking for How spiritual practices like meditation, journaling, and Light Language can help you feel connected even in your quietest, most solitary moments Why reaching out — to an old friend, a new acquaintance, or even yourself — is one of the most powerful forms of self-care you can practice Remember — you are never too old to start a new chapter. Resources & links mentioned: Soulful Women’s Network — Join my own community for women over 50, meeting monthly in-person (Central Florida) and on Zoom. Find the free Facebook group by searching Soulful Women’s Network on Facebook or go to facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Good Grief Retreat — A small, intimate retreat for women held in Black Mountain, North Carolina in June, co-facilitated by Gloria Grace, Patricia Alton, and Jessica Lee Alton. Designed for women navigating grief and loss of any kind — a relationship, a loved one, an identity, a season of life. Learn more at goodgriefretreat.netRegistration ends April 15th, 2026. Meetup.com — A free resource for finding local groups organized around shared interests, hobbies, or life stages PodFest — The podcasting conference where Gloria Grace made a meaningful new connection that led to a Light Language sharing event Wise Women’s Retreat — An annual one-day retreat hosted by Katheryn Napier and Patricia Alton featuring talking circles, drum circles, and creative activities Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Get my free Personal Power Archetype Quiz to discover your unique strengths and start designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz Follow or subscribe to Design Your Life, Your Way so you never miss a conversation about midlife, meaning, and living life on your own terms. And if this episode spoke to you, please leave us a review. Know a woman who’s been feeling quietly disconnected lately? Share this episode with her. Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do for someone we love is remind them they’re not alone. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about community, purpose, and what it means to truly come home to yourself in this season of life. TRANSCRIPT Have you felt a little lonely lately? Well, if you have, and you really are a woman in midlife, you know, someone who’s over, certainly over 45, definitely over 50, you’re not alone. A 2025 study revealed that one in three U.S. adults between 50 and 80 admit to being lonely, with women more likely to actually report that. And also, late last year and the end of 2025, an AARP survey came out that said 40% of Americans over 45 report being lonely, and that’s up from 35% back in 2018. And I gotta tell you, that sucks. I’m just gonna be blunt, because it’s no fun being lonely. And I, and I admit I, I have felt that from time to time. I, I do value being alone. I like spending time alone, but I also love being with people. And, And I feel that, you know, there’s been this talk of a loneliness epidemic that we have, and I think, especially here in the United States. And I know if you’re listening to this podcast from another country, and we do have people who listen who are in other countries around the world. Thank you, by the way, for listening. You know, you might be having some of your own challenges with that. And I know, I think one thing that. Well, there’s lots of things at work for it, actually. And actually, that study that I just referenced talked about unique challenges like caregiving responsibilities, changing family dynamics, you know, becoming an empty nester, for example, work stress. And a researcher from the. She’s a professor of neuroscience and psychology at Brigham Young University. She was on a podcast, I think a psychology podcast I saw an article about. Her name was Dr. Julianne Holt Lundstad, and she studies social isolation and loneliness as a predictor of depression, anxiety, and early death. And she identify technology as, you know, our lovely smartphones, as a likely culprit. I think that’s. I think it’s a combination of all those things, really. Why Life Transitions Leave Women Feeling Isolated Divorce, Empty Nesting, and a Shrinking Circle You know, you wind up where you might have a smaller circle of friends, especially if you’ve gone through a relationship change. Let’s say you’ve gotten a divorce. And I, I have definitely heard of. Women who, you know well, and men, too. You know, you. You have friends together as a couple, and then when you split up, you know, sometimes it’s hard. You know, you. You may not. Maybe you met the person through your others, through your spouse, and so now they knew your spouse first, so now you may not want to stay friends with them because, you know, it gets to be a whole dicey thing. And again, you know, I mentioned, you know, kids leaving home. You know, I’m, I’m a prime example of that. I, I’m, I’m very grateful that my children are grown and living wonderful lives. Unfortunately, they don’t live close to me, so I don’t get to see them that often unless we use, Unless we use technology. You know, we use things like zoom and we’re able to have conversations, but it’s. It’s not the same as being in person. And I was blessed to be able to do that last year when my son got married, because then my daughter had to come home from Europe and to attend her brother’s wedding. And so we got to spend time together and. Which was lovely. The Deep Human Need for In-Person Connection Being able to be together with the people you love is great. And, and that’s, I think, what we need so much of. And a lot of things were going into my mind today about why, why I wanted to talk about this subject today. And, and, and ultimately what I want to talk about is building community and, and how sometimes that becomes a challenge as you get older to, to build your own community or, or to find community to, to be able to socialize with other people so that you’re not lonely. You know, it’s. Connection is a really a basic human need. And when we don’t have that, that’s when you have these symptoms that can start having. Developing where you. For things like depression and anxiety and heart disease even. Technology: The Double-Edged Sword for Midlife Women We need to be connected to other people. And, and it is so. It’s so odd that technology on the one hand has brought people together. I mean, from around the world. I mean, I’ve. I’ve been able to connect with people through this podcast I’ve been doing. I’ve been podcasting on a steady basis now since the end of 2019. We rebranded in January of this year from Live Love Engage to design your life your way. But I was able to interview guests from around the world. I know I had guests from Ireland. I had a guest one time who was in Bali. You know, it’s wonderful how technology can bring us together and yet at the same time, especially certain social media sites seem to be driving us apart. You know, these algorithms that start serving you things that can raise your blood pressure, frankly, you know, get you all riled up. You know, it’s just like watching the news, you know, the, you know, murder sells as opposed to good news, you know, so that’s why I try. I don’t watch the local, local news anymore because that’s all it is. It’s, you know, traffic deaths and, you know, crime, and, you know, it makes you think that there’s nothing good going on in the world. And as I’m recording this, you know, we’re, we’re involved in another conflict, shall we say, in another part of the world. And. It’s tough, you know, I, I, I have a tendency to be empathic and I, and I know I’ve been a little out of sorts of, over the last week because of all of the, the stuff that’s going on. And, you know, you can’t, I mean, unless you really, you know, lock yourself up in a cabin somewhere in the woods, you know, it’s kind of hard to escape what’s going on in the world. And it can be challenging sometimes to regulate your emotions and to keep yourself on an even keel. Spiritual Practices That Help With Emotional Regulation Meditation, Journaling, and Light Language as Grounding Tools And that’s why I come back to doing a lot of my practices, which include meditation and journaling. And I just realized I forgot to journal this morning. Shoot. Oh, well, maybe I’ll do it after the podcast because I’ve been, I’ve been getting back in the habit of journaling every day and I just realized I didn’t do it. Got it. It’s a good practice. It really helps. The other thing that helps is my practice of sharing light language. And I got to do that on Sunday with a couple of wonderful gentlemen. And it was through a connection that I made at PodFest a few weeks back. And that’s a community that, that was a community of podcasters that I was able to go and be with and attend, you know, wonderful presentations, you know, teaching all everything you want, everyone ever wanted to know about how to podcast and how to market it and all this good stuff. But because of a existing friendship I have with a wonderful friend of mine, she introduced me to someone else that she had met and I clicked with this gentleman. He lives in California, though, and I live in Florida. So we’re not going to be able to see each other physically for probably, who knows, we’ll see sometime we’ll be able to get together again in person. But now we’ve been able to connect via zoom. And, and he actually, he and I put together this event where I was able to share white language and that made me feel so good to be again, be able to share something that’s near and dear to my heart with other people. And, and that’s one of the things that I recommend for you. If you are someone who is experience experiencing. That’s what I’m trying to say, loneliness is to get active. Do Something, whether that’s volunteering, whether that’s finding like minded people to socialize with. Practical Ways to Find Your People After 50 Conferences, Meetup Groups, and Showing Up in Person Meetup is a good place for that to find, find groups that you can connect with or attend events like, like I did. You know, maybe there is something if you’re, you know, actively a, as a business owner right now, if there is a trade show or, or, or conference that relates to your industry, then I encourage you to go to it and meet some new people because that’s what we need. And it’s one of the reasons, you know, again, trying to not be, trying to be in community, sometimes you might have to create the community yourself. And that’s what I did A few years ago. I actually started a group called the Soulful Women’s Network. And I started this because a group that I had belonged to decided that they weren’t going to meet in person anymore. They were only going to hold meetings online. And as much as I’d love to meeting with people online, I want to be able to see someone in person. I want to break bread with them, I want to give them a hug. And so I started this group and you can actually, I have, the free version of the group is available on Facebook. And so I encourage you to, you know, look for Soulful Women’s Network on Facebook. I’ll have the link in the show notes for you, but I would love for you to join it. But if you are local to the central Florida area, we meet once a month in person. And as a way to help my other members who don’t live in Florida, I’ve decided to also meet once a month on Zoom. I was sort of going one month on, one month off type of thing, but I’m experimenting And so next Thursday we’re going to meet on Zoom. So if you want more information about that, I’ll have the link to that as well. I’ll have the link to our meeting. I do charge for the meeting because I put work into planning what we’re going to be talking about. We, we do, we do a discussion, we do masterminding. I, you know, have to pay for Zoom. So you know when we’re doing that. So anyway, yeah, I’ll have the link for that in the show notes, but, but that’s what I decided to do is I, I decided that okay, if this group wasn’t going to do meet in person, then I had tried some other ones I’d visited, but I, I just felt like I wanted to start my own. And this name popped into my head during, while I was meditating and I searched for it online and nobody else had a group called the Soulful Women’s Network. So I said, okay, I’m taking that as a sign divinely intended and I grabbed the URL for it. Now I know I don’t have it quite set up properly. If you go, actually if you go to soulful women’s network.com it will take you right to the page. I think for our meeting, I think, I’m not sure how I have that set up. Just check the show notes. Okay. Don’t worry about them. Retreats, Women’s Circles, and Creating Community From Scratch Anyway, what else do I want to talk to you about? So the other thing I want to mention is that. Another way that. Well, okay for if you’re in business, like I said, you can go to conferences. That’s where I lost my train of thought there for a minute. You can go to conferences and things like that and to meet people. But if you’re not in business, let’s say you’re retired maybe or you’ve just, you’ve got business. Business is good, but it’s like still on your personal side. You want to be able to meet new people. So as I mentioned, meetup is a good resource. That, that is one. And you know, you can check on social media, you know, Facebook, there are different groups, search for something. Maybe you’re into gardening. I know there’s gardening groups, there are, there’s political groups. You know, I actually joined a group before the last election and, and there it’s a social group but made up of people from that particular persuasion. So I met some lovely ladies that way and so you can look for things like that. And maybe you want to convert again. Now we talk about events like there’s also conferences that you can go to for your personal well being and, or I should say there are things to do like retreats, for instance. So I just attended not too long ago a one day retreat with some lovely women that put this on every year, Catherine Napier and Patricia Alton. And it’s called this Wise Women’s Retreat. And it’s, it’s a wonderful day to. Again, we, we do talk, we do like talking circles and we did a drum circle and we made a wind chime. I have this lovely wind chime hanging in my, out on my balcony now. And we always do some sort of craft and it’s really cool. And if those names sound familiar, you might have listened to a prior podcast episode because those two ladies plus Patricia’s daughter, Queen Jess Lee, as she like, as she goes by Jessica Lee Alton the four of us are actually hosting a retreat in June in North Carolina and it is called the Good Grief Retreat and it’s, it is for women and it’s going to be a lovely weekend in North Carolina. And, and in that episode that, you know, like I said, it was just, it was just a few weeks ago that, that, that episode dropped. Healing Grief Through Community: The Good Grief Retreat Why Shared Loss Brings Women Together You know, we talked about why it’s so important to be in community, especially when you are grieving, when you’re go. When you’re grieving some type of loss, whether that is the loss of a loved one, whether it’s the loss of a relationship, the loss of a pet, you know, where pets are like family members too, it could be the loss of an identity, you know, again through. Maybe you’ve become single now. Maybe, you know, you’ve, you are gotten divorced where you’re separated or, or maybe you’re an empty nester or you’ve been downsized at work. You know, that’s another loss when that happens. So we wanted to put together this event to help bring together a small group of women. You know, we’re looking to have 12 to 15 in this lovely lodge up in Black Mountain, North Carolina. And our, our plan is to do some really deep healing at this event. So that’s another way that you can go and, and meet people. Because when you’re going through things like this, whether you’re just, you know, whatever has happened and, and you’re feeling like you’re not, you’re alone and, and it’s hard for you to, to cope, it’s so good to get together with other people who are going through similar experiences. And even if it’s not the same exact, that feeling of loss is one that we’ve all felt at one time or another. I mean, I’ve, I’ve lost family members, I’ve lost pets, I’ve, you know, I’m an empty nester. I mean, and I’m separated from my husband. You know, tick, tick, tick, lots of these boxes I can tick off just for myself. And I’m still here with a smile on my face. So I have been able to heal from those things and by doing things like talking with people. I mean, I’ve, I’ve done grief counseling. I’ve, I’ve worked with coaches, I’ve attended events and, and being in a community, being with other people, it really makes such a big difference. So I hope I, I know I feel like I’ve been talking really fast today. So let me, let me kind of, let me circle back A little bit here and. A Message to Every Woman Feeling Lonely Right Now And kind of recap what I’m talking about, actually. Yeah, let me. Yeah, let me just circle back. So. So if you are a woman who is definitely over 45 and probably over 50, if you’re listening to this podcast or you’re watching it, whether you’re watching it on new reality TV actually, or. Or even on YouTube, if you are feeling lonely right now, I want you to know that, number one, there’s. It’s. Okay. It’s your feeling. You’re allowed to feel that and. Know that you’re not alone. Yeah. Because even at our lowest, when we do feel alone. Here’s the thing now, okay? This is my belief, so take that with a grain of salt. Okay. You Are Never Truly Alone: On Consciousness, Connection, and Faith What I’m going to say right now, because I believe that we are. We are all connected, all of us human beings. We are connected through our consciousness. And. And there is a higher power, or greater power, if you will. I heard somebody use that phrase once. Greater power, as opposed to higher power. A greater power, which is this collective of all of us, which something created the universe. Okay, you can say the Big Bang, but what created the Big Bang? I don’t know. Maybe I’ll know one day when I’m not living in this physical body anymore. But the point is, is that we are all part of a human family. So even if you feel alone right now and you are feeling or. And. Or feeling lonely, maybe you’re not alone. Maybe you’ve got family around you, but you could still feel lonely. I’ve. I was in a marriage where sometimes I felt lonely, even though he was, you know, in the next room. And a lot of other people I know go through this sometimes. So it doesn’t. It doesn’t. Feeling lonely is not dependent on being alone. They are two different things. You can be alone and quite happy or. And you can be alone and feel lonely, or you can be with people and feel quite happy, or you can be with people and feel alone or feel lonely. How Meditation Helped Gloria Through Grief and Loss And I’m going to come back to this again. You’re not alone, even if you feel that way. And I know I felt that way after my sister passed. I really did. And I was not alone. I was. You know, I had. I think my son was still living at home then. I don’t think he’d gone to college yet, or he might be. He was still. When he wasn’t in college, he would come home for the summer. So he was still there. Like my daughter. Daughter graduated and was living on her own or. Well, even she was still, I think, at home even too, after, right after my sister passed. So I was in a house full of people, but I felt alone. And it was because my sister was that last connection to the family I grew up with. And my. My parents had passed, my brother had passed a long time ago. So it was just, you know, me and my sister. And so I lost that. And I felt alone, even though I wasn’t. And it took a while for that feeling to subside. And one of the ways that helped me was something that thankfully I’d been doing for many years prior to that was a regular meditation practice. Spending that time to go within and be with myself helped me to remember that I wasn’t alone, that there was still. I still had this presence with me. There was God. I, I still call it God, but you can call it whatever you want. The universe, source, whatever. And it did take a while for me to get better. But I went to like the wise woman retreat I know I went to. My very first one was after my sister passed and, and that even though I was sad, it still felt good to be around other women. So. Even though technology can make us feel alone, but it can also bring us together. And it’s brought you today listening to the podcast. So thank you for being here and I hope you know that I love you. I don’t know what you look like. I don’t know if you’re male or female, how old you are, where you live. I know nothing about you except that you have the presence of mind to listen to the podcast today. Your Action Steps: How to Start Rebuilding Community Today Reach Out, Show Up, and Take That First Step Hey, you know, if you can’t laugh at yourself, who, Who? You know, I gotta laugh first before somebody else laughs at me. I learned that lesson as a kid. Well, maybe later as an adult. I didn’t learn it. No, I didn’t know that lesson as a kid. Unfortunately, I wasn’t. I. I wasn’t one of those resilient kids or like comics who learn how to, you know. Yeah. Make fun of themselves first so they don’t have people laughing at them. I didn’t. It took me a while. I had to get to adulthood before I could do that. I think maybe I might have started to do it as a teenager, but I know as middle school and younger, yeah, I was an easy target. People would pick on me. Okay. Anyway, sorry. I digress. Let’s get back to this. So find. Find a circle. Find a ways to reach out. And oh yes, This is self care at its finest, is reaching out. Oh my gosh, I just remembered what was that there was an old AT&T commercial about like reach out and touch someone when they were advertising long distance. In the days before we had cell phones when you only had a phone on the phone on the wall, you know, the landline and long distance was so expensive. I remember those days. I’m old enough for that. You had to, you know, at least in our household, you know, you didn’t want to stay on the phone too long because it would cost a fortune. That’s another blessing that we have today. We can talk. Depending on what phone plan you have, you probably can talk unlimited to someone around the world. Well, maybe not. That’s a topic for another day. If you’re here in the United States. Come, come, come, come join us. Depending on what phone plan you have, you probably can talk unlimited to someone around the world. Well, no, some of those calls cost a lot. But anyway, calling within your country is usually pretty, pretty darn cheap. I’m messing up my hair here today, sorry. Okay, so reach out. I got distracted again. I’m good at distracting myself. I’m so sorry. Maybe I do have adhd. I don’t know. I have to take a test, I think and self diagnose. Maybe I am. Anyway, my point is you, it’s up to you. You have the choice of whether you want to stay lonely. And you know, there are some days where, you know, you might choose to do that, but don’t make it a habit. Go out and find someone. And, and, and yes, if you can’t get out of the house, maybe you’re somewhere up north and you’re snowed in. Then do take advantage of technology and connect with people via Zoom or, or just call them on the phone or text, whatever, you know, go on to social media, connect with people. But if you can physically leave your house, find opportunities to meet with people in person, you know, find a hobby, join a club. I’m, I’m actually, I know some ladies who belong to like the, our local Moose organization and they go to, they have like events, dances and things and they go to those and actually I remember my dad was a member of the Moose. So yeah, I mean there’s, there’s organizations out there, fraternal organizations, women’s clubs, there’s all sorts of different ways. Use friendly AI if you have to, you know, go on to perplexity. Perplexity is a good one for that, I think, and search and say how do I find, you know, what, what types of groups are there in my city that are interested in, you know, this topic and see what comes up, you know, or search on social media. But you, you be the person to call. Maybe I haven’t talked to an old school friend in a long time. Well, give them a call. This Weekend, you know, or tonight even. Maybe not even wait till the weekend. Give them a call tonight and say, hey, I was thinking about you. How the heck are you? In fact, I’m thinking right now that I haven’t heard from my. My cousin. Normally he. He’s really good about sending me an email on my mom’s birthday. And he, like. Because he always thinks of his Aunt Betty at that time, and I didn’t get an email, so I need to reach out to him and see how he’s doing. So that’s what I want you to do today. Okay. Know that you have the power to find community, and if you can find community, start one of your own. Start one of your own, you know, or. Or plan an event like I did. I held my own retreat a few years ago. I called it unplugged to recharge. And. And this idea came to me because I didn’t want to spend my birthday alone. Hmm. And so what I did is when this idea came, I. I sent an email out to my list and said, hey, I’m thinking about doing this. What do you think? You think this would be a good idea? Would you come to something like this? And I had a lot of positive responses. So I said, okay, I’m going to start planning it. And I did. And about three months later, three, four months later, I held my retreat. I want to do it again, too. I’m just not sure when, but I’m going to do it again. Stay tuned. One of these days, you’ll hear from me. Join Us: Good Grief Retreat in North Carolina But in the meantime, I do hope that you will consider checking out the Good Grief Retreat because it’s. We’ve made it as affordable as possible and you can get all the information again. I’ll have the link in the show notes, but you can go to good grief retreat.net and you can learn all about it. And I hope you’ll consider joining us because, you know, there’s going to be four of us. There’s going to be 12 to 15 people we’re going to meet in like. So each of us are going to take, like a group and we’re going to, you know, have small talking circles, and then we’ll all get together as a big group as well and do some of. Do some different activities. So it’s. It’s going to be. We’re going to talk about grief, but we’re also going to do things that light us up and bring us joy because that’s what we want to do. We want. We want to be able to Heal and be happy again. And, and yeah, so check it out. Even if you’re not, even if you haven’t experienced any kind of a loss right now, give yourself the gift of a few days away in the mountains. It’s a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful setting. And it’s the end of June. It’s a really great time. It’s not too hot yet, so it’s a really good time to get away. So check it out. Wherever you are in the world, come to. Well, maybe not. That’s a topic for another day. If you’re here in the United States. Come, come, come, come join us. Light Language Transmission: A Message for Your Heart What Is Light Language and How to Receive It Come join us. So before I end the podcast today, I love to share what I talked about at the beginning, which is light language, which is something that has really helped me to lighten my load, to release some of the angst and things that happen in my, in my life. And it’s really wonderful for helping you with whatever is weighing on your heart, shall we say, right now. So, and this is what, I’ll also be sharing this at the retreat, by the way. So I’m just going to share a short little message with you today, and if you are, if this is your first time listening to the podcast and you have no idea what I’m talking about, just know that I’m going to be speaking and, or singing in a language that you’re. You, you. You may not be able to translate possibly, but you most likely will not be able to translate. It might sound familiar to you, and that’s okay, because this is a message for your heart. This is a message for your soul to listen to and just set an intention that whatever you hear today will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. And that’s what I’m going to do as well. So if you happen to be listening to the podcast while you’re driving, I encourage you to pause right now and come back to this. When you can be just sitting down in a nice quiet place and maybe even listen to this with headphones, if you don’t have them, haven’t put headphones on. Might be nice to just kind of block out the outside world a little bit more and then. Yeah, and just, just let it wash over you. Okay, take a deep breath in and out like I just did there, just to get grounded. Okay. [Audio transmission only] I apologize for a couple of the pauses in that. That was interesting. I’ve like never yawned. It was like, like about three times. I needed to yawn while I was in the middle of that. I swear I had enough rest last night. So that’s something interesting. I’m not sure what that was about. Yeah, there you go. Closing Thoughts and How to Stay Connected And I meant to also invite you to subscribe to the podcast if you aren’t already. I meant to do that earlier and you know, follow us on social media. We are on also new reality tv. So if you want to watch, if you are listening right now and you want to watch the podcast, go there and you can watch it there and then it will also be on YouTube later on as well on my YouTube channel. And I think that that is going to wrap it up for this edition of Design your life your Way. So I will be back next week with some more ideas on how you can embrace this incredible season of life. And be sure to check out the description of this video for a full rundown of today’s important links. Share this with a friend on social media and let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I love hearing from you and it helps me figure out how I can best serve and support you moving forward. Remember, you are never too old to start a new chapter.

If you’ve spent decades saying yes when you meant no, this episode is your permission slip to stop — and a gentle reminder that setting boundaries isn’t selfish. It’s sacred. Midlife women who engage in people pleasing often feel resentful, exhausted, or quietly invisible in their own lives. In this solo episode, I get real about my own lifelong journey as a people-pleaser that started in childhood and I name the real cost of living without boundaries: lost identity, low self-worth and a life that belongs to everyone but you. Together, we’ll explore what boundaries really are (and aren’t), why they’re an act of self-love rather than selfishness, and how to start setting them even when it feels deeply uncomfortable. I’ll share personal stories from my marriage, business, and coaching practice, and close with a Light Language transmission to help you energetically release the stress that keeps you saying yes when your soul is begging for rest. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why people-pleasing often starts in childhood, and why that pattern is costing you more than you realize now. The real reason boundaries feel selfish (they’re not) — and the mindset shift that changes everything. How to identify where you need boundaries most, using your body as your guide. Simple, compassionate language to set limits and hold them — even when someone pushes back. How a Light Language energy transmission can help you release the stress of over-giving and come home to yourself. Whether you’re navigating midlife reinvention, healing from years of caretaking, or simply ready to stop abandoning yourself — you’ll walk away with clarity, practical language, and a renewed sense of permission to design your life, your way. Resources & links mentioned: L.O.V.E. Method — Gloria Grace’s signature framework: Let Go and Let God / Open Your Heart to Receive / Value Your Uniqueness / Embrace Your Divinity Light Language Energy Healing Sessions — learn more at gloriarand.com/light-language-healing/ Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Personal Power Archetype Quiz — Discover your unique archetype and what it reveals about your path forward. Take the free quiz at bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz Good Grief Retreat — A sacred space to process life’s many losses and rediscover yourself. Learn more at goodgriefretreat.net If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Are You a People-Pleaser? Recognizing the Pattern in Midlife If you are tired of doing things for everyone else without feeling appreciated, you might be a people pleaser. I know, I’ve been there and I like to think that I am a reformed people pleaser now because I learned how to set boundaries. I’m still a work in progress. I can always do better at that. But I am getting better at setting boundaries and that’s what I want to talk about today. So the importance, why do we need boundaries and how we can go about setting them. Especially if you are someone in midlife who has been doing a lot of stuff for a lot of people over the years, whether that’s in your business, whether that’s in your family, if you’re a woman, odds are you have probably been a caregiver at some point in your life, even if you’re just taking care of cats or dogs, you know, because I know not everybody is a mother of children and that’s okay. You might be an aunt, maybe you, maybe you take care of your nieces or nephews, or your business is your baby. And it’s so important to have boundaries in all of those places because otherwise you can have a lot of stress in your life, you can have a lot of anxiety in your life. What Does It Actually Mean to Have No Boundaries? So what do I mean by boundaries? What, what does that mean really? Well, as I said, it’s about saying yes when you want to say no. A lot of the times it’s doing things for others, almost getting to be doing it as a habit or just automatically when someone is looking for a volunteer, you’re like, oh yeah, I’m there. Or, or maybe it’s just jumping in before even somebody needs help. Maybe you’re just that go getter person and you like to be in control and you just want to take care of everything — in moderation. That’s a really good quality to have, to be that go getter, to be that leader, to be someone who takes action and also takes care of people. I mean, that’s a really good quality to have. The problem comes in when you’re doing it at the expense of your own health — physical and mental and emotional health. That’s when boundaries become important. How People-Pleasing Erodes Self-Worth Because again, when you don’t have boundaries, not only can it cause stress and exhaustion, but it can also really contribute to low self worth. Because if you are placing your value on making other people happy, well, let’s face it, sometimes what you do is not going to make people happy. And then you have to deal with that disapproval and that can really trigger shame and self doubt. And that’s not a good place to be. That’s not a happy place. So that’s where boundaries are needed. Another thing that can happen if you don’t have boundaries is that when you are always putting others needs first, putting others preferences first, it can now be hard to know what you want. What do you really, really want? As the Spice Girls used to sing. You know, you start forgetting. How People-Pleasing Starts in Childhood — A Personal Story And I gotta say — so I’m gonna share a little story here from my own life. I started doing that at some point, you know, and I know it started as a kid actually, because I wanted — I was the peacekeeper of the family. My mother and father were often at odds. And so I would be the one who would try to, you know, go tell your father this and go tell your mother this. And so, yeah, I’m that person in the middle. And so I learned that also because of tension in the house. And sometimes my mother, God rest her soul — she’s a wonderful lady, fantastic, amazing person, and also had a good Hungarian temper. So I would do whatever I could to please her because I didn’t want to be on the other end of her anger and have her be yelling at me. And so this led to — and I still even remember this at a young age — her buying me a particular outfit to wear to school that I just thought was the most hideous thing in the world. But I couldn’t say that I didn’t like it because I was afraid of consequences, that she would yell at me, and I didn’t like that. And even right now, it’s like, oh, my gosh, I can still feel the tension in my chest coming up remembering that. Ah, Mom, I loved you, but, man, I really wished I could have been more honest with you. And hopefully I’ve done a better job raising my own kids so that they have been — I think they can be honest with me. I think they’ve been honest with me. I hope so, anyway. So yeah, that’s why boundaries are important. And again, see, it can start in childhood and then it can continue as an adult. When I Finally Realized I’d Lost Myself Completely And so I remember — I might have told the story on the podcast before — but I was at a conference or workshop or something. Anyway, the point is they were having us imagine — they were doing some mindset work — and having us imagine what would be our ideal life. And at this point in my life, when we’re going through this exercise, I was drawing a blank. I couldn’t come up with anything of what my ideal life would look like. Oh, gosh. Yeah. Just thinking about that just makes me so sad for that version of myself that I was back then. Thankfully, this was many years ago — probably about eight years ago at least. And I learned that, yeah, I had to start setting boundaries. And one of the biggest boundaries I set was asking my husband for a divorce. And let me tell you, that was a scary proposition because I didn’t know how he was going to react. But I decided that I needed to. I was tired of settling. And that’s what having no boundaries leads to — you wind up settling. You let the other person have their way. And instead of sticking up for yourself and saying, no, I’m not happy, I don’t want to do things this way. I want it to be different. The Real Benefits of Setting Boundaries for Your Health and Relationships Okay, let me clear out some of that stress. So let’s talk about the benefits of setting boundaries now that we know kind of what it causes — a lot of negative energy. So when you set boundaries for yourself, this helps you to have less stress. It helps prevent burnout. It allows you to protect your mental health. It helps to create safety and clarity and respect in your relationships. And this can be personal, but it can also be business relationships too. Boundaries in Business: Setting Limits with Clients Let me come back to this because I want to talk about the business part of this. When I was first starting out doing copywriting and online marketing as my business, I had a client who loved to set appointments with me to have these strategy sessions and we would plan out what he wanted to do with his marketing. And we would talk, sometimes up to an hour, and I would actually meet him in person — and then he wouldn’t implement what I suggested. So I had to learn to set a boundary with him and say, okay, we’re only going to meet for this amount of time. And eventually I wound up letting this client go because he would keep complaining that his business wasn’t growing, but he wasn’t taking action doing the things that I suggested that could help him. He wouldn’t even try. So I can’t work for someone like that. That’s where you have to set boundaries with clients — set work hours. In fact, that’s something I had to do too, because when I first started in business, I would be available on the weekends and almost 24/7. And you have to have a life, people. Yes, your business is important, and of course when you’re first starting out you’re going to spend a lot of hours, but eventually you get to a point where — and I would say set this up sooner rather than later — set expectations with your clients. Yes, I will be available from 9 to 5, but otherwise send me an email and I will respond to you the next day, or whatever works for you. But set those expectations, set those boundaries, because otherwise you can really find yourself in a bad way. Boundaries as Sustainable Compassion So when you are able to set boundaries, it allows you to be more sustainably compassionate — and I would say compassionate when it matters — because you’re not always serving from an empty cup. You are filling yourself up. You are practicing self care, and that’s what a boundary is. A boundary is an act of self care, and dare I say, self preservation as well. And it helps to define your responsibilities. You know, what things you’re going to take care of and what things you’re not. And that way people understand — this is their responsibility. Like when I’m coaching a client, for instance, I set expectations that they need to fill out an intake form. They have weekly assessments to fill out. If we’re meeting weekly, they need to let me know they accomplished what they said they wanted to get done that week. So it’s defining what I’m going to be responsible for and then what they’re going to be responsible for. In this way, everybody’s on the same page and there’s no surprises. “But I’ll Feel Guilty”: Overcoming the Fear of Setting Boundaries So I can hear you saying out there, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, this sounds good in theory, but if I try to set a boundary with somebody and they don’t like it — I’m gonna feel bad, I’m gonna feel guilty, I’m gonna feel selfish. Okay. Yes, you might feel that way in the beginning. But guess what? Like anything, setting boundaries requires practice. And it requires getting comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. There’s this great song — it’s an oldie from the 70s, I think, by Rick Nelson. It was called “Garden Party.” And it goes, you know, you can’t please everyone, but you got to please yourself. So this is where what you have to do — setting a boundary is a way of pleasing yourself. And the more you do them, the more you get used to doing them, it’s going to help you to feel more in control of your own life. You’re not letting other people dictate your life. You are regaining control and it gives you more peace and more freedom. The Mindset Shift: Boundaries Are Protection, Not Rejection And it requires a key mindset shift. So here’s the deal. Boundaries are not about rejection. You’re not rejecting someone by setting a boundary. Now, they may take it that way, but that’s their problem, not yours. A boundary is a protection. Think about it — a boundary is like a fence outside your yard to keep stray dogs from coming in. It’s protecting your well being, protecting your home. So a boundary is a protection of your well being. And because you do this, it then allows you to care for other people more effectively without abandoning yourself. How to Start Setting Boundaries: A Practical Guide for Women Over 50 Okay, got it. Boundaries are good. If you take nothing else from this podcast today — boundaries are self care. They are necessary. And think about it. Think about people who set boundaries with you. Hopefully you appreciate that they’re doing that, because again, it allows you to see what you are responsible for and what they’re responsible for. So how do we do this? How do we start setting boundaries? Well, first you gotta become aware. You really do. You gotta become aware of where in your life or in your business are you feeling a little resentful, taken advantage of, exhausted, perhaps anxious? What are those situations like? And take a look at those. And then as you’re doing that, make a list of what you need more of. Do you need more rest? Do you need more time alone? Do you need emotional safety? And then also think about what is it that you need less of? Maybe you’re tired of people asking you for last minute favors. Maybe you’re tired of being criticized. Maybe somebody is always dumping on you emotionally. When Your Body Tells You It’s Time for a Change I can think of — I used to have a lovely, lovely friend who, and also a mother too, bless her heart, who loved to just vent, just would vent about all the things that were going wrong in their life. And I prided myself on being a good listener. Well, it’s good to be a good listener — it definitely helps when you’re a podcast host and you have a guest on. But being a good listener in those cases can be very draining. And I also had a client one time who was one of these people who rejected every piece of advice I gave her — so much so that I started having a stomachache while I was on the call with her. And I had to finally just say, you know what, I don’t think we’re a good fit. You obviously don’t like my suggestions. Let me see if I can connect you with someone else. And that’s what I did. I referred her to somebody else because we weren’t clicking, and frankly, just listening to her reject, reject, reject was not good for my emotional well being. So yeah, start with that self awareness first, because that is going to give you a clue about where you need to start setting some boundaries. Practicing Boundaries with Small Stakes First And then you can start practicing. It’s good to do this with small stakes. Maybe someone just invites you to meet for coffee during the day and you’re working. You could start by saying something like, you know what, I would love to go, but I can’t take time out of my day right now. Maybe we could meet on the weekend. Or maybe somebody needs a favor and you could just say, I’m sorry, but that won’t work for me this week. Maybe another time I can help you out. As you’re doing this, as you’re practicing, you want to be able to use simple I-statements like: “I understand this is important to you, and I’m not able to help with it right now. I hope you find good support.” “I don’t mind helping once in a while, but I need more notice in the future.” Expect Discomfort — and Do It Anyway And as I mentioned before, expect some discomfort. Yeah, it’s going to feel icky. Your tummy may get a little upset from time to time as you’re doing this. Maybe you get some tenseness in your shoulders, or however it is for you that you feel uncomfortable. Just recognize that. And in fact, you could even make a mental note to yourself saying, yeah, this is making me uncomfortable. So this is probably something that’s good for me. Gloria said to expect this — that if I’m setting a boundary, I might not feel great about it. So expect it. And remember, you’re not being selfish. You are practicing self care. And that is a really good thing to do. When Someone Pushes Back on Your Boundaries And if you are dealing with someone who’s a bit narcissistic — who really likes their own way — I think sometimes narcissists and people pleasers are probably attracted to each other. There’s some sort of energy thing. I don’t know this for sure, but I’m just thinking about my own life. So if someone pushes back when you start setting boundaries with them — and it very well may happen — just calmly repeat your boundary again, or maybe walk away. Say, you know what, we’ll have to discuss this another time. I’m not up for it right now. That’s okay. And if they are still pushing — guess what? Now they’re the ones being selfish because they want you to do what they want you to do. And if they start laying on the guilt — oh, come on, if you don’t do this… I can’t do it without you… — hopefully you stand your ground and just say, I would love to do this, but it’s just not the right time for me. Or: I am overwhelmed right now. I can’t take anything else on. I would love to help you. I am so sorry. Another time, please feel free to contact me. And then follow through. You don’t have to put up with it. You don’t. Adhere to your boundary, and every time you do, do a little happy dance, celebrate, pat yourself on the back, literally, and say, yes, I did it! Because when you do — oh, man — it releases those endorphins and you start feeling so much better about yourself. This Isn’t About Becoming Selfish — It’s About Conscious Choosing And like I said, I think I mentioned at the beginning — practice makes perfect. The better you get at setting boundaries, the easier it becomes. I want to make sure I reinforce this: this is not for you to become a selfish person and not do anything for anybody else. That’s not what I’m advocating here. What I’m advocating is that you don’t be a people pleaser on default. That’s not your default setting. You choose when to help people. You choose who you want to help. It’s your life. The name of this podcast is Design Your Life, Your Way. So you get to decide how often you want to help, how often you want to participate, how often you want to volunteer, who you want to help. Maybe you are very happy with perhaps once a month letting a dear friend of yours vent — just as long as you are doing it consciously and you are choosing. You know what, I am going to be here and let her do this today. And hopefully it’s because you really love this person a lot and you know she’s going through something right now. You might still say when you start on the phone call, you know what, I’ve got about an hour, so let’s get into it. What’s going on in your life right now? And then as the hour comes to a close, you say, oh, darling, I love you so much. I hope my listening has helped you. And I’ve got another appointment I’ve gotta get to. That’s okay. Because again, you’re setting boundaries for yourself — and for her. So yeah, it’s so important. Take care of yourself. It’s so important to do that. A Light Language Transmission to Help You Release and Receive Okay, I want to share something with you right now. I want to share one of my favorite modalities that I love to share on the podcast. My intention is that it will help you release some of the stress you might be feeling — even just this feeling about setting boundaries — so that you can release that and know that setting boundaries is good for me. In fact, if you need to, write that down: Setting boundaries is my self care. Setting boundaries is good for me. Write that down somewhere so you can see it, as a reminder to practice it. But I want to share with you a Light Language transmission right now. This is a spoken or sung message that I’ll share for you to listen with your heart. It’s not something necessarily that your brain understands because it will sound like a foreign language, and that’s okay. It’s not something I’m able to even translate word for word. When I share this with clients, it’s really about an intention and it’s a feeling and it’s an emotion. So I’m going to set the intention that what you will receive today will be for your soul’s highest good and will allow you to take care of yourself by setting boundaries. If you are listening to this while you’re driving a car, pause the podcast, come back to it later when you can be seated in a nice comfy chair, put your feet on the floor, close your eyes if you’d like, and just set an intention for yourself that whatever you hear today — whatever emotions it might even stir up — is for you. The first time I heard light language, I cried. So just be open, be open to whatever your soul feels you need to feel today. Okay. All right, we’ve set it up — so I’m going to trust that you have paused and you are back now. Just relax, maybe take a deep breath, let it out, and just take a moment and listen. [ Light Language Transmission — Audio Only ] Closing Thoughts: Boundaries Are Your Self-Care Practice So that’s Light Language if you’ve never heard it before. I hope you liked that. And if you’re a new listener — yeah, especially if you are a new listener — just know whenever I do the solo episodes, I love to share that because it’s a gift that I’ve been given, and it benefits me as much as I hope it benefits you. And I would love for you — if you experience something today, if you’re ever curious about it and you would like to know more about it and maybe even experience a session for yourself — I encourage you to reach out to me. You can find me on social media. I’m on LinkedIn. If you want to leave a comment on this YouTube video, that would be great. I’d love to chat with you a little bit more about it. So I just want you to remember — boundaries are good. Boundaries are not selfish, unless you take them totally out of proportion. But I’m going to trust that you are going to set boundaries where it’s appropriate in your life. And remember — it might feel icky at first. But the more you do it, the more it will start coming more second nature to you. And it’ll be okay, because it is a way of practicing self care. So I’ll be back next week with some more ideas on how you can embrace this incredible season of life that you’re in right now. And yeah, so stay tuned for that. Be sure to check out the description of this video for a full rundown of today’s important links. Share the video with a friend if you enjoyed it, share it on social media, and let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I really love hearing from you. It also helps me figure out how I can best serve and support you going forward. So until next time — remember, you are never too old to start a new chapter.

What if the next chapter of your life isn’t a wind-down — but the most powerful, purposeful season you’ve ever lived? Social impact strategist Suzanne Smith says women over 50 aren’t running out of time to make a difference – they’re just getting started. Life after 50 used to mean you’d retire and settle down, play with the grandkids, maybe even do some traveling. But as you’ll learn in my conversation with Social Impact Architects CEO Suzanne Smith, this season is prime for making an impact. A professor and TEDX speaker, Suzanne has spent decades studying and teaching what it makes to be a change maker. Together, we explore her signature Four T’s Framework as a practical, soul-aligned map for giving back in ways that energize you rather than drain you. This is a conversation about reclaiming agency, reconnecting with purpose, and discovering that your life’s work has never been more valuable than it is right now. Whether you’re craving community, longing for meaningful impact, or simply ready to stop doom-scrolling and start hope-scrolling, this episode will leave you feeling grounded, encouraged, and ready to take that first small step. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why women over 50 are in a “powering up” phase — not winding down — and the science that confirms it. How the Four T’s Framework (Time, Talent, Treasure, Testimony) can help you give back in a way that fits your gifts, your schedule, and your soul. Why “energy management” matters more than time management — and how to choose service that fills you up instead of depleting you. The surprising truth about “talent”: you may be undervaluing the exact gift that others are desperately waiting for you to share. How using your voice — your testimony — on social media, in your community, and in classrooms can create ripple effects you’ll never fully see. A simple monthly practice to explore where you’re called to give back and build the consistency that brings real belonging and joy. How “hope scrolling” can shift your energy, your algorithm, and your sense of what’s possible in today’s world. About My Guest Suzanne Smith is a social impact strategist, professor, and TEDx speaker who helps people design lives of purpose and possibility. As CEO of Social Impact Architects, she guides changemakers at every stage, including those seeking a meaningful second act. Her 4 T’s framework blends strategy, soul, and storytelling to spark sustainable community impact. Her upcoming book, Flywheel, is a guide to professional change making, and her weekly Substack blog, Social Trendspotter, has over 13 years of archived insight on social change and community impac Connect with Suzanne Website: SocialImpactArchitects.com Substack: Social Trendspotter LinkedIn: @SuzanneSmithTX Resources & links mentioned: Suzanne’s TEDx Talk: Everyone Is a Change Maker Find a Giving Circle: philanthropytogether.org Red Wine & Blue (organization I attended): redwine.blue Big Brothers Big Sisters of America: www.bbbs.org The Good News Network: A media resource for uplifting, solution-focused stories. Visit goodnewsnetwork.org Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. Take my free Personal Power Archetype Quiz and explore your natural strengths as a midlife entrepreneur: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz TRANSCRIPT Meet Suzanne Smith: Social Impact Strategist and Change Maker Gloria Grace: Namaste. Today’s guest is a true change maker and she’s going to be helping us talk about being a change maker. And the reason she’s going to do that is because she is a social impact strategist, a professor, a TEDx speaker who helps people design lives of purpose and possibility. And as the CEO of Social Impact Architects, Suzanne Smith guides change makers at every stage, including those seeking a meaningful second act, which is what we’re all about here on Design Your Life, Your Way. So she has a framework called the Four T’s and it blends strategy, soul and storytelling to spark sustainable community impact. I love all those S’s in her bio. That was really good, but I think I handled it well. So without further ado, I’m going to bring Suzanne up on the stage and we’re going to get right into talking about all how you can really make a difference in your life, in your life now and in the future. So welcome. Suzanne: Thank you so much for having me and what a wonderful introduction. I’m going to have to use you for other ways I’m being introduced. It was lovely. Gloria Grace: Well, it’s my pleasure. And yeah, when we first connected and I learned what you’re all about, I was like, oh yeah, this sounds just my cup of tea and just what I want to be able to talk about. So I think maybe what we’ll start off with is right where I talked about you. You have this framework called the Four T’s. So maybe you can start us off there and explaining what those are and how we can use them for greater impact. Why Midlife Is a “Powering Up” Phase, Not a Wind-Down Suzanne: Yeah, absolutely. So, you know, before I do that, I’d kind of like to enter into the conversation around women over their 50s. And so I know you spend a whole lot of your time in your podcast really talking through what that second act looks like. And so let me just give a couple of some framing around why this is such an important time. So I do believe that society kind of talks about it being a wind-down phase, but I actually think it’s a wind-up phase and that it’s a powering up. And really, I think women, myself included, are really in that place of power. Not only do they have clarity around what they like and what they don’t like, but they also have more capacity to do some of the different things that they want to do and they have confidence and courage that they can actually kind of deploy. And so it’s really a special group. Women as the Original Change Makers: A Historical Perspective Suzanne: And just to give a little bit of historical context. Putting my professor hat on. Many of the nonprofits that started in the early stages of kind of the evolution of the United States were started by women in their midlife. So think Clara Barton, think Harriet Tubman. And so while we’re talking today about everyday change making, so how anybody can be a change maker, which is what my TED Talk is about, there’s also this professional change making. So there’s a lot of women, and some of my favorite CEOs of nonprofits are people who are in their second act, and they decided to then shift from a corporate job into a nonprofit space. And so I’m really excited about kind of sharing this topic and giving people an opportunity to talk about the variety of things that they can do in their community in this powering up phase, as I like to call it. Gloria Grace: I like that. I love that idea of powering up, because it’s true. The old idea of retiring at 65, I think, has long gone by the wayside. I am at the tail end of the baby boomer age group. And I know certainly people that are older than me are still, you know, in their 70s, in their 80s, being vital, and they’re not necessarily sitting around watching TV or playing golf. They’re doing more than that. The Science Behind Midlife Wisdom and Resilience Suzanne: And that’s where you touch on the science that I think is so important. I think I just saw the study last week, which I thought, of course, was very reinforcing of what I see in the community, which is that while cognitive speed may decline as you get older, actually cognitive processing power increases because we have so many collective experiences that we can pull from. We are actually able to have a higher level of resilience. And we have just so much knowledge, and so oftentimes we can go through a situation in a much more calm place. And so from my perspective, that is absolutely what I see from the women that I work with, whether they’re chair of a board of a nonprofit I’m working with — an everyday change maker or professional change maker. And so the science really supports that. And then to your point, we know when people give back in their community that there’s this thing we call a helper’s high, that it actually decreases depression. It actually decreases loneliness. We do have a loneliness epidemic, based on what the previous surgeon general said, and it increases all those happy hormones that we all want. And you don’t have to do it alone. You can do it with a partner. You can do it with friends. It can help you meet new friends. And so we’re going to talk through all the different ways that your listeners can actually give back. Gloria Grace: I love that. Yeah. And I’ll share maybe later on just an experience I had yesterday, just that will demonstrate exactly what we’re talking about. But yeah, so let’s dive in a little bit now and get to the nitty gritty here and start sharing some of this good information here. The Four T’s Framework: A Practical Guide to Giving Back Suzanne: Absolutely. So you mentioned the Four T’s, which are my favorite. So if you think about the Four T’s, and you think about all the different ways you can give back, you can just choose those different ones that are best with where you are. And so it’s time, talent, treasure and testimony. The First T: Time — Starting Small and Choosing What Lights You Up Suzanne: And so of course, time is the first one because you’re giving back. But what we find oftentimes when people give back is they sometimes underestimate just how a small amount of time makes a big difference. So one of the things that we know longitudinally about young people is that if they have one or two adults that invest in them, it can change their trajectory. And I’m an example of that in the sense that when I turned 18, I actually got involved in the Big Brothers, Big Sisters program. And so not only did I get a lot out of that program, but I was also able to invest in someone too. We’re still together, we consider each other family. And so, you know, thinking about the ways that you could potentially mentor somebody, you could help them with their reading skills, you can also dedicate your time as a professional and you can actually serve on a board. So thinking about how you can give your time and what I typically remind people is to think about something that lights you up. Suzanne: So whatever is going to light you up, this is what you should be thinking about when it comes to your time. And so because people who are in their second act have more time, and I would actually say it’s less about the actual time, because my belief is I don’t really practice time management anymore. I practice energy management. And I think that my experience with people who are in midlife is they have really figured out what they like, who they want to spend time with, and so they end up having more quality time. And so in this time category, I would encourage people to really reflect upon what lights you up, what are some things where you could give back and you could feel like your time was well spent. And that energy needs to be a factor in that. Like, you should come out of that experience feeling more energized from that volunteering experience versus less energized. Gloria Grace’s Story: Community, Division, and Being Heard Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. And I will say that, just to share an experience I had yesterday — as we’re recording this, we’re in a very fraught type of culture right now and a lot of division going on. So there’s a wonderful woman that I met recently, started a group that invited people to come together where we can help to foster communication and try to be able to communicate with people who don’t necessarily share the same ideas that you have, and to try to listen to them, because that’s what we all want. We all want to be heard. And so we had about close to 20 people yesterday show up, and a lot of people were talking about how they were feeling frustrated and angry. But by the end, it was like, it was so great because we realized, wow, we had different beliefs, but we all felt heard and we all felt like we all had something in common. And we left feeling much more optimistic about getting together again and seeing what else we can do. So to your point — you don’t have to be stuck by yourself. You can look for opportunities to spend your time with people who get you. Start Local, Start Small: Finding Your Volunteer Fit Suzanne: I agree. And I always encourage people to start local. There’s a lot of small needs that the community needs. I’ll give an example. I had a neighbor of mine who realized that we were having some traffic congestion and even some accidents because there was a two-way stop that was kind of intermixed between four-way stops. And so she went to city council and said, look, we need to fix this. So it doesn’t have to be big, it can be small. And you kind of start small and build. So look local, start small and build, and then find the thing that lights your fire. You know, really think about the people that you want to intersect with and the issues that you deeply care about. And there are volunteer centers across the country who stand ready for you to look at all the different things if you want to see what’s out there. But you can also email or call your local nonprofit and just say, hey, I want to volunteer. What are some ways in which I can volunteer? Gloria Grace: Yeah, definitely. And I will put a couple of organizations in the show notes that I’m in particular a big believer in. And AI is our friend, right? We could go on to Google and look in your community and see. But I do think you’re right. You know, it does have to be something that lights you up because life is short and you need to spend it on things that are going to give you a good feeling, give you purpose, but also be something that you can look forward to doing. Suzanne: And then the research also shows that if you can give that time consistently, you get a higher return. So rather than a scattershot effect where I’m doing this and I’m doing this and I’m doing this — if you find a volunteer activity, so maybe you’re a docent at your local art museum where you start building a community, that’s actually also highly beneficial. So you almost get two for the price of one. You get the helper’s high, but you also get community and connection at the same time. So also finding something over time that you can commit to. I oftentimes recommend just use a month to do exploratory time and just spend time doing lots of different things, and one of them will really stand out to you. Then stick with it for six months and see if it’s still a match. If it is, then you’ve found the thing that you want to give back to that really lights you up. The Second T: Talent — Leveraging Your Unique Gifts for Social Good Suzanne: So that’s really my best advice when it comes to time. So the next one is talent. And they’re kind of connected to each other, but they’re a little bit different in that what I find from women particularly who are in their second act — so they’ve had an amazing corporate experience or they’ve been an entrepreneur and started a business and now they’ve got extra time — but they also have this really amazing talent. And that talent can really be leveraged for the benefit of the social sector. So it could be government, it could be a nonprofit. It could also be an opportunity for that individual to eventually turn it into a nonprofit if they wanted to. So this is the former executive who wants to help a nonprofit by being on their board or going in and doing project-based volunteering. Suzanne: So maybe they need to streamline the way that the food bank actually does their intake process. I see retired Toyota executives being great with this. There’s also people who have a really good gift of emotional support and maybe they’ve experienced something themselves. So they’ve had a loved one that has been in hospice as an example. And that’s such an experience that until you’ve actually been through it, you don’t quite understand it. And so they go back and actually mentor people who have family members that are in hospice. So they’ve got this rare talent of connecting with people and they’re giving it back and kind of paying it forward. And what I typically tell people is — find the thing that everybody keeps calling you for and ask people what your talent is. Sometimes it’s the thing people are calling you and saying, I need you for this, because it means you’re equally talented, above average in that area. Gloria Grace: Absolutely. I know when I talk with my clients, a lot of times we don’t necessarily put the value on it because it’s something that just is second nature to us, but it is something that other people are like, you can do that? Oh, please help me. Real Stories: How Small Talents Make a Big Donor Difference Suzanne: I’ll give a funny story. So, you know, I have a couple of board members who don’t like asking for money and so they’ve resisted joining a board because they’re like, I’m not a fundraiser, I’m not an asker. And I always remind them, you also have to have stewardship, because the cheapest customer to get is the customer you already have. And so I have two board members — one who has lovely handwriting. And so she just sits and writes these beautiful thank you notes after people make a donation that are personalized. She sits there while she’s watching her British mysteries, and she just writes these beautiful thank you notes. And then there’s another who loves talking on the phone. And so she will call donors and say, I just want to tell you about what this after school program did. They had this huge thing on astronauts and the kids dressed up… I’m going to text you the picture. And just that quick phone call, because of course no one actually answers their phone anymore, it just goes to voicemail. To do those calls over a couple every day — it has had dramatic impact on their donor stewardship as well as donor retention. Gloria Grace: Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Those small things. I mean, one is handwriting and the other is talking on the phone. So everybody’s got talents that they can give back to the space. And any nonprofit would love to have those kinds of talents. The Third T: Treasure — Giving More Than Just Money Suzanne: Yeah, so treasure. We’ve talked a little bit about donating to the nonprofits, but I want people to think kind of broadly about what their treasure is and really thinking about the way in which you could give back. So obviously writing that check is important, but it’s also your opportunity to bring people in who maybe don’t quite understand all the great things that are going on in a community. And you could create a magnetic effect. So it doesn’t necessarily have to be your treasure. It could also be your friend raising towards that organization and the work that needs to be done. Suzanne: And of course, thanking people, properly stewarding people — like the docents who volunteer for art museums, they’re incredible stewards. And people then want to give back as a result. And so treasure is one of those things where it is important for the space to continue to get donations, particularly very recently where government has less and less money to give to nonprofits. So we need to support the charities that we most care about. But you can also find other people who can give back to that organization and learn about that mission. How Entrepreneurs Can Give Back — and Strengthen Their Business Too Suzanne: In addition to that, many women are entrepreneurs. So you may also want to think about using your company to give back. And I’ll give you a quick example of this. So there was a gentleman that I was working with who was in midlife, and he actually came to a lecture I did on giving back, and he’s like, oh, this is just for corporations. And I’m like, well, let’s think about that. And so he actually did some investigation. He asked his employees, like, if we were to give back, what would we do? And the employees said, well, let’s adopt the local after school program. So that’s what they did. He ran an oil change company. They actually donated the oil changes over time. When they visited, they realized most of these young men and women had no idea about auto mechanics. So they actually then taught auto mechanics — like how to do oil change, how to check your tire pressure. And over time, they got closer and closer to the nonprofit and they did a roundup campaign. And while customers were waiting, they could learn about this local after school program, which then led to additional donations. The last time I saw this individual, he’s now on the board of that afterschool program. Suzanne: And while he doesn’t need to actually do the calculations, he thinks it’s actually helped his bottom line because oil changes is a commodity, and he can get oil changes anywhere. But the people in that community are choosing to use him because they know he is invested and they know that he’s giving back to the community. And so that’s another great example of if you’re a woman who’s running a business, you can also give back to the community in small and large ways. Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. And I know I do get notices from local organizations and they’re always looking for sponsors. Like golf tournaments where you could sponsor a hole, supporting a local charity. So there are ways that, as this gentleman found out, it ultimately benefits your bottom line, because people do like to see that companies care. Women’s Giving Circles: Community Philanthropy and Collective Power Suzanne: So if you also want to join a community of giving, there are now more giving circles across the United States for women than any other group. And so if you want to give and you want to connect with other women who want to give back, I guarantee you, if you live in a major metropolitan area, there probably is a women’s giving circle. And there may be even ones connected to your ethnic background — the Asian community, African American community, Hispanic community, also has giving circles. That’s also a really great way to work with other women. You actually pool your resources, pool your money, and then you deploy it to nonprofits that are directly connected to things that that group cares about. So that’s another really great way of building community while also getting that helper’s high. Gloria Grace: I love that. All right, so what’s our last T? The Fourth T: Testimony — Using Your Voice to Spark Change Suzanne: Testimony. So using your voice and of course, this is all the stuff you would think of. So going to social media, going to Facebook, and if there’s a charity or there’s an issue you deeply care about — I know for myself, every time I get a mammogram, I always post it and say, women, this is important. You need to do this. And you don’t know what the impact is on that, but it certainly gets people to like, clock in and say, have I had one in the last year? But also to really using your testimony to make sure that you’re involved in things that are going on at your city hall, maybe you need to testify about the importance of arts and culture funding or the importance of your libraries. So using your voice in that way. Whether it’s signing a petition, signing up to go speak to your city council, writing a letter — all of those things really matter. As someone who used to be in the policy space, I know that legislators and policymakers are counting the number of people who’ve contacted them around an issue before they make that vote. Mentoring the Next Generation: Guest Lecturing, Reverse Mentorship, and Paying It Forward Suzanne: But I’d also encourage one other thing. Because we have this benefit of lots of experiences, you know, I oftentimes say I’m a patchwork quilt of every person I’ve ever met. So that quilt’s big now because I’ve met other women that have been pieces of what I have learned along the way. So I also encourage women to go back and guest lecture at universities or mentor young people, because of course, when we’re very early on, we don’t fully understand sometimes that it’s a marathon and not a sprint or any of the different things that are important to young women. And so allowing them to learn and benefit from your experience, I think can be really helpful in the classroom. I also think it’s just helpful for one-on-one mentoring. And so I definitely encourage you to contact your local university. I guarantee you there’ll be professors like me saying, yeah, come in and guest lecture or come in and mentor young women who want to be entrepreneurs or want to be architects or want to be lawyers — just to give them that little bit of an edge. Gloria Grace: And I think sometimes we forget all the things that we’ve done over our lifetimes as you get older. You may focus on some of the more standout things and kind of forget the little things. But those little things also were useful and helped out other people. I like this idea of speaking to university students. I actually was invited one time to do that and it was a great experience. So how would you go about that? Because my background is actually in mass communications and I got my degree in radio, TV, film. Would I contact that department first and just say, hey, do you ever have guest speakers come in? Suzanne: Yeah, so really twofold. So your instincts are absolutely right. I would contact the local university — and it doesn’t have to be the one that you went to. I would also encourage community college as well. These are people, oftentimes it’s their first time in college, which means that they didn’t have parents who went to college or were in that career track. So they almost need more support and assistance. And so from my perspective, high school, community college, college, whatever you have in your local community is equally of benefit. It’s really important for young women to see people doing the career they’re most interested in. Suzanne: So I would contact the department that is most closely connected, if you’re wanting to guest lecture. But then I would also contact career services, and those are the people who run the mentorship program. And believe it or not, I’m a big believer in reverse mentorship. I bet you you are too. Gloria Grace: Oh, yeah. I always recommend to people who are mentoring that they really be open to what they’re going to learn from young people. I tell people the reason why I teach — one of the many reasons I teach — is it really is the fountain of youth. Like, I feel like I’m younger and definitely hipper and definitely more connected because I get to interact with young people. So I have questions for them, like, well, how are you using AI? Or what’s the new cool thing that I need to know about? Or what does 6, 7 mean? Like, can you explain it to me? So I do believe in reverse mentorship of really asking them their opinions about things. And it just builds a lot more connectivity, and it kind of also reduces the pressure of the insecurity that young people might have in asking difficult questions. Gloria Grace: Oh, yeah, absolutely. And so my mom was 37 when she had me, and she used to say that I definitely kept her young because I was interested in things. And so we were watching David Letterman when he was on NBC, listening to music from Devo and things like that. And she was interested and she liked that stuff. And so I kept her young. And so yeah, we can always learn. And it’s so great to be able to have generations together. Gloria Grace: I even had a guest on my old podcast under that name of Live Love Engage who did intergenerational travel for the same kind of reason, to bring people of different ages together so that they can learn from one another. So this is awesome. Navigating Business, Government, and Nonprofit: Being Trilingual in Social Change Gloria Grace: And I want to talk about one thing because you have kind of alluded to that — I saw somewhere where it says that you say you’re trilingual in government policy and business. And I wonder what has been like some of your big takeaways from being able to navigate those different areas. Suzanne: I love that. So just to give the listeners a sense — I have a public policy degree from UT Austin. I worked in the nonprofit sector as a lobbyist and worked with them on strategy and then shifted and decided I wanted to go back to school and get my master’s in business at SMU. And so I oftentimes say I speak government and policy, nonprofit as well as business. And what we know is that some of the most complex issues that our society is dealing with — take whatever issue you deeply care about. It could be the environment, it could be animals, it could be art, it could be homelessness. Those issues are so entrenched and so complicated. It is really going to require all of those sectors to come together to create a strategy moving forward. Understanding the Poly Crisis — and Why We’ve Been Here Before Suzanne: And so part of what we try to do at Social Impact Architects is really help educate people on the professional change making of how do you actually solve for these things? And so I think the thing that most stands out to me right now is that we’re in what we call a poly crisis. And so four or five years ago at Davos, they talked about all of these things that are coming together. And really in some ways it’s shaking the very foundation of human society. And it’s not any one thing. It’s a lot of things — it’s economics, it’s AI, it’s generational trends like we were just talking about. And economists and sociologists call that a poly crisis. Suzanne: And I think what can happen when you have that unsteady foundation is you think, oh my gosh, things are falling apart. But I tell people — and I have the benefit of wisdom, but also because I was a history and government major — we’ve been here before as a society. You know, if you think about what happened after the printing press, or the radio, or the transition from the horse and buggy to the automobile, we’ve seen these big shifts. And sociologists say they happen every 80 years. And we just have to adjust to these new circumstances, which is why I think the blending of the generations is so important. We’ve solved social issues before. We’ve come really far on things like civil rights. Tobacco was something when I was growing up that was a big issue. And now we’ve virtually extinguished tobacco use. And so I think we’ve really done a lot of work on a lot of social issues. Suzanne: And so what I try to remind my students and people when I speak is — we’ve been here before. It’s really about us having the right professional skills around change making and continuing to persist. So not getting overwhelmed, continuing to recognize every single day we as individuals make a choice around how we want to change the world. And in our small little neighborhood, there are things we can be doing every single day to make it better. Just really leaning into being a force for good individually as well as collectively. Gloria Grace: Amen. I love it. And that was the one thing that was breaking my heart a bit last night at this meeting — so many people were just feeling so overwhelmed and depressed. And my philosophy is trying to — I was telling one woman, you know, yes, I know. And yet at the same time, I will see posts where they’re talking about all communities coming together and helping out one another and looking for ways to support each other, escorting kids to school and preparing meals and all of the stuff we can do right now. No matter what political situation is going on, it still comes back to just supporting one another. Whenever there’s like a natural disaster, the people rally around one another. I believe that we’re all inherently good, and it sometimes does bring some stuff around us to remember that we can help each other. From Doom Scrolling to Hope Scrolling: Reclaiming Your Energy in 2026 Suzanne: Well, and it goes back to what I talked about before, which is that I don’t believe in time management. I believe in energy management. And so I think right now all of us need to control our energy and what we’re consuming. It’s one of the reasons why — and I know you and I talked about this — I’m on a personal campaign in 2026 to get people to less doom scroll and more hope scroll. And part of the hope scrolling is making sure that you’re consuming the right information, which is where the world is at a realistic level. Knowing that the algorithm is probably going to create the doom and gloom itself. That’s just where the algorithm is at this point. But we can shift the algorithm. Who’s in control of it? It’s us. Suzanne: Yeah. And so if you post all the great things that you’re doing with the nonprofits that you’re working with, if you talk about the stop sign thing that you got, if you talk about the city council meeting, people are going to recognize they can break through that moment of overwhelm and realize the only way through it is to find one thing that they’re going to do differently and get that helper’s high and really use their agency around something in their local community. And honestly, I’ve seen the change in people — if they just take a month and really explore their community, figure out where they can invest, they actually the next month feel a whole lot better. And then they don’t pay attention to the bad news. They just pay attention to all the good that they’re seeing. Because to your point, there’s far more good out in the world. Unfortunately, good news just doesn’t have the same PR engine that bad news does. So we just have to be mindful of that in our practices and that energy management. Gloria Grace: Absolutely. And you know, I know during COVID there, I had stumbled on someone in the entertainment industry who was curating good news. And I think it was even Jim Krasinski, that actor from the office. But I know that there are even social media pages like on Facebook where they do — and I think it’s called like the Good News Network. So it’s out there. We can find it, we can look for it. Right. And you don’t have to — I know I’ve been guilty of it. This morning I realized I was doom scrolling again. Stop it. I have to slap my hand. The Science of Social Media, Phone Addiction, and Protecting Your Sleep Suzanne: And the science really supports it. If you haven’t read Jonathan Haidt’s work, I highly encourage it. In my class, I usually will have them read his early Atlantic article “Why the Last 10 Years Have Made Americans Uniquely Stupid.” And there are a whole lot of things about your phone you don’t fully understand and how it is interacting with your brain. It’s almost like an addiction in many ways, which is why many states across the country and now some countries are actually banning it for young people. But I personally think we should be really helping adults with regulation as well. Because just as an example with energy management, I don’t watch the news after 8 PM. Just like I don’t take caffeine. I don’t do anything news after 8 PM because otherwise it connects with my deep sleep and my REM and all the things that I need and it’s just not good for me. So I really do limit how much I’m interacting with bad stuff and I really control my feed. Which you can do. You can shift the algorithm. Gloria Grace: Absolutely. You can even just on Facebook, you can just follow your friends. There is a friends feed, folks, and you don’t have to be inundated with everything else. One Takeaway for Women Over 50: Power Up and Give Back Gloria Grace: So this has been amazing and we’ve covered a lot, but I just want to maybe just boil it down right before I ask you how people can get in touch with you. So if people, the women out there listening to this today could just take one thing from your message, what do you hope that would be? Suzanne: I think it’s really that they’re not powering down, they’re powering up. And to live in that power and to really take that first month to build clarity around where their energy is best. So try a lot of things, things they’re excited about, things where they can build connection and then consistency. So really figure out that thing that is going to give that consistency to you so that you’re building a community, you’re finding that helper’s high on a regular basis, and you start seeing the impact of your work and then start putting in some things where you’ve got some courage. You go and talk to a college class or you go talk to city council or other things where you’re able to benefit from the wisdom that you’ve inherited over all this time period and you’re able to give it back to your community. So just to live in that clarity and confidence and just that courage. And just know that you are standing on the shoulders of a lot of women who in their midlife have really been the silent engine behind a lot of the social change that has happened. And so we’re excited to have you join us. Gloria Grace: I love that. And I did like at the very beginning — so if you happen to tune into this podcast towards the middle or towards the end, now go back to the beginning because Suzanne wonderfully mentioned that a lot of nonprofits were started by women. Women really are — and I remember someone was talking about this a while back where they talked about a lot of great change, making a positive difference in our country, has happened from women. Women are the founding mothers. Cokie Roberts came up with that phrase, and I’ve always loved it. Suzanne: Yeah. And those founding mothers are still with us. I see them every day in the board chairs that I get to work with, the nonprofit CEOs who are in their second act, the volunteers who are running the gala, the giving circles that I see. You know, it’s that quiet activation that happens, like underneath the surface, which really goes back to our very origin story, when Alexis de Tocqueville went back to Europe and said, what’s special about America? It’s this is a nation of joiners. And when they have an idea, they move forward with it and they move forward with speed. And it really was the women who were the quiet group behind that made all those things happen. And we still have those women who are working so hard in communities. And so I encourage folks who are listening to join the army because those women are out there and they need more people, they need reinforcements. How to Connect with Suzanne Smith and Learn More About Change Making Gloria Grace: Absolutely. Awesome. So if someone wants to find out more about change making and how to learn more about making a social impact, where can people reach you? Suzanne: Absolutely. Well, I definitely encourage them to go to Substack and subscribe to our weekly blog, Social Trendspotter. You can also do it on our website and get it in your email box. Whatever works best for you. We also have 13 years archived on that website. So if there’s something that interests you with its movements or some of the things we’ve mentioned, you should be able to find it there. And then I also have my first book coming out called Flywheel, and it actually is about professional change making. And so if you are in the nonprofit space, it is the book for you. It’ll help you kind of give that 101 guide. Whether you’re new to the nonprofit space or you’ve been in the nonprofit space before, it’ll hopefully be a great opportunity for you to learn all the different dimensions of what it takes to do professional change making. So we’ll put that all in the show notes and I look forward to engaging with you guys in this next phase of your journey. Closing Thoughts: Start Small, Make a Difference Today Gloria Grace: Awesome. Well, thank you so much, Suzanne. Really appreciate it. Thanks for giving such an important topic time and space. Suzanne: It’s really been an honor. Gloria Grace: Well, I do want to thank all of you for listening and for watching today. And I hope you’re encouraged to know that you can go out and make a difference today. It doesn’t have to be huge. Remember, you can just start small. You know, one phone call, one knocking on a door, or just calling a friend and reaching out to an organization that you feel passionate about — and know that you can make a difference. And I love that when Suzanne is talking about this helper’s high — I think that is so good because I know if you are feeling depressed or something, when I’ve experienced that, one of the best ways I’ve found to get myself over it is to reach out and help somebody else. It really does make a difference. So thank you for listening. Thank you for watching. If you’re not subscribed, I encourage you to subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Subscribe on YouTube. You can also check us out on newrealitytv.com as well. And until we meet again, I just want you to go out and just make today great.

Do you know what it’s like to release 50 pounds off your body one year and put all that weight back on the next year? That’s been the story of my life for the last decade. If you’ve ever let a healthy habit slide like I have, you’ll want to listen to this episode. I’ll share how you can rebuild those habits without shame – one doable day at at time. This one is for the woman over 50 who’s felt the gap between who you know you’re meant to be and the daily patterns that keep pulling you back. Here’s the good news. You’re not broken. You’re human. You’ll learn why starting small matters when it comes to making a change, and how consistency becomes your secret superpower. You’ll hear real-life examples from my own training goals – to run a 10K and a half marathon this fall – and how I’m using structure, reminders, and accountability to make the habit “stick.” Plus, I’ll share a light language transmission to support your nervous system and your spirit. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why women in midlife are actually wired to build habits successfully — and why that’s a scientific fact, not just a pep talk The truth about “starting over” — why you can reset at 2pm on a Tuesday, and why that grace is a spiritual practice, not an excuse How to use habit stacking and simple visual cues to anchor new behaviors into the routines you already have Why big lifestyle transitions (grief, divorce, empty nesting) are the wrong time to launch new habits — and what to do instead to care for yourself in those seasons The power of accountability — and how to find the right kind of support that feels like love, not pressure Whether your “habit” is about your health, your business, your spiritual practice, or simply giving yourself the care you’ve spent decades giving everyone else — this one is for you. Resources & links mentioned: Book: Atomic Habits by James Clear Book: The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron Google Voice-to-Text: alternative to written journaling if writing is a barrier. Support STEM education by sponsoring my 10K run at DisneyWorld: https://runsignup.com/gloriarand Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace Rand: gloriarand.com/offerings Explore upcoming retreats for women over 50: goodgriefretreat.net Try a free 15-minute introductory Light Language session: tidycal.com/gloria3/lightlanguageintro If this episode spoke to you: Leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand and tell me: What’s the one small habit you’re ready to begin again… today? TRANSCRIPT Welcome: Your Midlife Empowerment Guide Introduces Today’s Topic Namaste. I am Gloria Grace Rand, your midlife empowerment guide. And today’s episode is all about habits and how you can make change really stick. And it came about the way I was inspired to talk about this this week is because I am endeavoring to get back to doing a new habit. I’m really going to be starting seriously on it in the summer, later this summer. Setting Bold Goals After 50: Training for a Disney World 10K As I’m recording this, it is the middle of February, but I have a goal. I have a goal right now and that is a goal that my son and daughter in law are going to be doing a 10k race in Disney World in the fall. And so mom used to do half marathons many years ago. It’s I, and I think I was looking at the last time I did one was about eight years ago, as a matter of fact. And I decided that it’s time for me to lace up my shoes and get out there and, and go out and run, walk. That’s just probably what I’m going to be doing with, with my son and daughter law in Orlando at Disney World because I live in Florida. They’re going to be coming all the way from another state. But since I live right here in the Sunshine State, it makes perfect sense for me to go ahead and do it with them. So I decided, so I signed up for that. And I’m actually, I’m going to include the link in the description below because I’m actually running for a good cause. Running for a Purpose: Supporting STEM Education I am doing it for, to support STEM education, which I think is really good. And if you’re listening to this podcast or watching it and you’re not in the United States and you’re like, what the heck is STEM education? It’s basically science and technology education. So helping young people to be able to learn and be able to then get careers in technology, engineering, science. And both of my, well, my son and my daughter in law are both, they’re involved with cyber security. So this is right in their wheelhouse especially I’m very proud of them that they’re both involved in technology. So yeah, I want to be able to help other young people do that. So I’m going to do that. And not only that, I decided since it has been eight years since my last half marathon where I live here in Florida on the Space coast, they have a Space coast half marathon in the fall, which I have done before. And I decided that, what the heck, I’m going to do the half marathon as well. And it just so happens that it works out to be a month after the Disney one. So it’s right in my training and that’s what I wanted. Why Building Up Slowly Is the Secret to Half Marathon Success That’s what got me thinking because I started looking through my, my old papers and, and training guides and things about how to do a half marathon. And if you’ve never done running or, or even walking a, a long race, especially like a half marathon or a full marathon, I’ve even done two of those. Never again. It’s too long for me. But you have to start small. You’ve got to build up your stamina. You, you don’t just go out and say, especially if you’re over 50. And I, and the first time I did a marathon I was over 40. So you don’t just decide if, especially if you’re not a regular runner, which I was not. If you’re not a regular runner, you don’t just sign up for a race and then just go ahead and don’t do any preparation. Then you just go out and expect to run 26.2 miles. If you’re doing a full or 13.1, if you’re doing the half, you’ve got to build up. You have to get conditioned. Your legs, your whole body, frankly, needs to get in condition for that. And as part of that, since I do have this really good goal now in the fall, so I’ve got several months before I have to do that. I am determined that this year I want to be in the best possible shape that I’ve ever been in to do one of these races. Embracing Self-Care and Healthy Habits: Getting Your Body Race-Ready Releasing Weight and Giving Yourself Grace Because in the past that was not the case. I was definitely overweight. Attempting to do these races. I’ve. I would. Would have been at least always 20 or 30 pounds heavier than would have been ideal to really be at my best and to have a race take less time than it has done for me. So just to give you context here, so I mentioned I did do two full marathons in the past. It took me well over seven hours. Not a good, not a good pace, people. Even the half marathon, I think my best time was maybe 3 hours and 15 minutes or so. That could still be a little bit better if I was in better shape and so get back to these habits. So what I’m going to do, I’m not going to start actively run walking until probably June. But in the meantime, since I have several months between now and then, I am going to start doing like a long walk every weekend and just, you know, so I did like two miles this past weekend and I will probably do the same again this weekend. And, and just at Least do some walks. Toning, Core Work, and Starting Small with Exercise And I’m also going to start working on two things. Number one is doing more toning of my body and doing, you know, doing. Lifting some light weights and doing some core work and start getting in the habit. I haven’t. I’ve done a little bit, but I. What I’m going to be doing is start really coming up with a schedule for myself and figuring out which of the best exercises that I could do and do something like at least one or two exercises every day to help me to start getting in shape for when I get ready to be seriously training for the race. Getting Back to a Consistent, Healthy Diet The other thing I wanted to start working on again is being more consistent with my, with my diet. I did. And I. And I don’t say diet as in dieting to lose weight. I’m talking about diet of what I’m eating every day, the food that I eat. Not necessarily, yes, I would like to release a few more pounds, but more of just getting back to eating a consistent healthy diet day in and day out, because I did indulge over the holidays and even into. In January because it was, I don’t know, whatever. Whatever the reason, you know, I, I’ve. I did a really good job over the past year, year and a half of releasing a lot of weight. And so I gave myself grace and said, okay, yes, you put a few, few of those pounds back on, but not. I didn’t go all the way. I haven’t put all of them back on. And that is a significant thing. And, and I patting myself on the back for that. And, and if you’ve ever done something like that, it’s really good to recognize that, number one, I have, I’ve. I’ve had to deal with. I’ve had weight issues all of my life, basically. I mean, I. Even when I was a little kid, in my diary, I wrote down how much I weighed. So, I mean, when I was like nine years old, even so, I was conscious that I wasn’t as thin as some of the other kids in my neighborhood, let’s say. So my highest point I reached in, I think about 2003, and it was a lot, and I was shocked to see how much I weighed at that time. So I vowed to never hit that milestone again. And I haven’t now, over the past 10 years, I have bumped up against another lower level, but still way too high for what I’m comfortable with. And so now, now that I’ve been able to get stay off of that for over a year, well over a year, even getting into two years now, I’ve, I’ve developed a new set point so that now that is my top weight that I’m never going to get to. And so now I’m working on making the weight I’m at now to be the next set point so that I never want to be heavier than I am right now. I, I, because it’s still, I’m okay, but I, I felt better when I was a little bit lighter like I was last fall. So I’m going to get there. I will get there again. And the way that I’m going to do that is by, number one, taking it one day at a time, especially with the, with the food and, you know, that’s really important. It’s Never Too Late to Start: Resetting Healthy Habits in Midlife And, and just starting small with, with doable things that I can stay committed to. And, and if you’ve, you know, ever, you know, considered whether you want to do a new habit, maybe it is, you want to start a new exercise program. And, you know, especially this time of year, we’re into February. If a lot of people who set New Year’s resolutions in January by the, by now that it’s six months or six months, six weeks into the year, they’re letting those slide. So you can start today. Even, even if you did set a New Year’s resolution to do something and maybe healthier for yourself and you’ve kind of given up on it, you know what? It’s okay. Forgive yourself. Start today. Start right now, right now and just say, okay, I’m going to do something different now. I’m gonna, I’m gonna go back to what I wanted to do, because that’s, that’s the important thing is that you can always start over. Taking It One Day at a Time: A Real-World Habit Reset Story You can always start over midday. You know, let’s say you, let’s say it’s, it’s the afternoon, and in the morning we’re gonna take food because that’s my, my thing. So let’s say you indulged in the morning. Well, you’re like, okay, yeah, that wasn’t the greatest. All right, so let me do the rest of the day eating well, and then that helps you to carry momentum into the next day so that you can say, well, okay, so I finished out the day. Good. Let’s see if I can continue that on today. And, and frankly that’s what I was doing last week because I had again, I had indulged in sugar a bit too much and buying cookies even though I trying to find healthiest per se cookies, but still, who am I kidding, they had sugar in them. So instead I said, okay, let me just get through one day today, one day, surely you can do one day. And so that’s my goal was to get through one day. And, and I did. I managed to get through the day. It wasn’t necessarily easy, but I did it. And so day two came around and it’s like, okay, I’m not even going to think about what I did yesterday. Let me just get through today. I’m going to pretend today is even just day one. And so let me just get through today. And by day three it was getting easier. Women Over 50 Are Actually Better at Building New Habits — Here’s Why And that is the wonderful thing about habits is that when you are consistent and you keep doing it day after day, they really do get easier to do. And I was doing some research before I got on today to record this and here’s some really good news for us women in midlife is that studies have shown that we’re actually better at adopting new habits because we often have strong self regulation and ability to delay gratification like I was able to do. An Important Caveat: Don’t Start New Habits During Big Life Transitions So now there’s a little caveat though, because habits can be harder to sustain if you’re trying to establish one while also going through some big disruptive lifestyle overhaul. So let’s say you are in the middle of, maybe you’re going through a relationship change and maybe, you know, either you or your spouse decided to, you know, split up and that you’re going to go and you’re getting a divorce. This is not the time necessarily to start a new habit. And I will also say you might be tempted to use it as an excuse to overindulge. And I’ve been there, I’ve been there. I, when my sister passed, I gave myself permission to eat my feelings. The problem is I kept eating my feelings even as my grief got better and eased up. So be careful, be careful about using a big lifestyle change. You don’t necessarily want to use that. You don’t want to necessarily try to do something new to start a new habit while you’re going through that. But also be mindful that this is a time where you need to take care of yourself even more. You need to practice self care, whatever that looks like for you. Maybe it’s getting an extra massage, maybe it’s just taking a bath once in a while and just locking, you know, well, not locking the door, but, you know, closing the door, putting, lighting some candles and just giving yourself some me time. It’s so important, you know, and get plenty of sleep. Do your best to do that. Do whatever it takes. I’m, I’m a big meditation proponent. If you’re a regular subscriber to the podcast, you know, I am, I’m a big fan of that. But maybe for you that means just going for a walk or just listening to your favorite music, maybe putting on, putting on, you know, a CD or something, or streaming, you know, music that makes you feel good. Just be kind to yourself when you’re going through that. Practical Strategies for Making a New Habit Stick Habit Stacking: Tying New Habits to What You Already Do So there’s some other ways that you can do too, to be able to, if you do decide, okay, I’m not going through a big change right now. Yes, I want to start a new habit. And maybe it’s something related to your business. It could be, or, or, and, and maybe it’s wanting to start, maybe having a better social media presence, let’s say. So start small and you can. One way to do this is to tie the habit to something you already do reliably, like eating a meal, brushing your teeth, you know, something that you already doing. You already got a regular routine and so it, it helps you to keep that going. So for me, for instance is I, you know, my, my non negotiable in the morning is meditating, but I also will endeavor to go out for a walk in the morning to, to make sure that I get my exercise in for that day. Using Reminders, Alarms, and Visual Prompts to Stay on Track Now sometimes I won’t. Like even today I got up a little late, so my meditation lasted longer. So I am going to go out this afternoon and to make sure I did. And I’m going to do something else too. Now that I think about it, is I put it on my calendar because I, I’m sitting at my desk all day and so I will see that reminder to go out for a walk this afternoon. But I’m thinking also I’m going to use my phone and I’m going to put a reminder on my phone as soon as I get done recording this podcast so that I will make sure that I do it later because sometimes you get sidetracked and then those, you know, that, that good intention of setting that habit goes by the wayside. So I don’t want to let that happen. And which, which gives me to my next point of how to set a new habit is, is doing things like this, you know, setting an alarm on your Phone or using some kind of other visual prompt, maybe post it notes. Post it notes everywhere that, you know, that remind you to do something. Atomic Habits: Start with One Small Habit and Build from There And, and. Oh, and what’s that? I actually have this book somewhere. Oh yeah, that’s right. It’s called Atomic Habits. It’s a, It’s a very good book. I forget who the author is. I’ll see if I can, you know, I’ll put that in the show notes. But he talks about, you know, starting, starting with like one thing, you know, building, building it up with, with when you’re doing a habit to just start with one thing first. Start with one small habit and then you can build on it as you, as you get consistent with doing that one thing, then you can add another one on top of it. Reducing Decision Fatigue: Plan Your Days, Times, and Tools in Advance And then the other thing is to help you with reducing, let’s say, decision fatigue, you know, is, is decide ahead of time what days and times and tools you’re going to use so that way you don’t have to reinvent the script. So for me, for instance, as I. When for training for this race that’s coming up, like I said, I went through and I, I had a folder with a whole bunch of race stuff in there and, and I found my old training schedule for doing a half marathon. And so what I did is I took copied over onto a new calendar that I had the days for, you know, because there’s days for resting, there’s days for just short workouts and then cross training and then the long workout days. And so I went ahead and, you know, started from like race day and then worked my way backwards. And that’s why I discovered that the Disney race actually is perfect. It’s, it’s the exact length that I need to, needed to be doing that weekend. So it’s like it was divinely intended, I guess, that I needed that I’m going to do both races and that the one serves as training for the other. So it’s perfect. Designing Your Life Your Way: Habits That Align With Your Purpose Yeah. So I hope this is helpful for you today because it’s, you know, habits are important. They really do help us with accomplishing our goals, whatever they are. And, and especially, you know, when it comes to designing your life your way, if you can come up with, you know, come up with a plan of like, okay, this is what I want my life to look like. And maybe part of it is doing changing, you know, developing more healthier habits for your body and whether that is exercise or diet or making sure that you’re getting enough sleep at night or developing a spiritual practice. The Power of Daily Journaling for Women in Midlife You know you want to start journaling every day. That’s, that’s another one that I, I was doing. I, I, I like to journal and I will do it consistently for a while and then I slough off. So I’ve been committing myself to getting back to doing some journaling every single day. And so far I think I’ve been doing that for about a week now maybe. So it’s a good start for me. And, and originally I just started with doing one page, and now I’m up to two pages a day. And it’s that consistency that helps and, and, and starting small. I didn’t just say, you know, okay, I’m going to do three pages because sometimes I’m doing that even can be too much, even though I know that I love. That’s what Julia Cameron recommends in her book the Artist’s Way. But sometimes three pages can seem like a lot. And especially when you’ve gotten out of the habit of journaling or you’ve never done the habit of journaling at all, it can seem like a lot and so figure out a way to do it. Don’t Like Writing? Try Voice Journaling Instead And in fact, I was actually, I was interviewed the other day for a podcast on, I forget exactly the name of it now, but it’s by the, the, the founder of New Reality tv, which, which my, the video of this podcast is actually streaming on now. And he doesn’t like writing, he doesn’t like journaling. He knows it’s a good practice, but he doesn’t like writing. And so I suggested, well, there’s other ways to do this. You could talk, you could just get a, get a recorder or do you know, Google has this way where you can, you know, speak, speak to text and you can just journal that way, but at least get your, get your thoughts out, you know, and then they, you know, will come out on paper. How to Write Your Book 15 Minutes at a Time And in fact, now that I think of it, if you wanted to start writing a book, oh, that’s a good one. If you have that burning desire to write a book, there are some people who will just sit down and spend hours writing at one fell swoop. There’s other people who, the idea of doing that is just overwhelming and, and, and, but yet you still want to be able to tell your story. So I was working with a coach when I was writing my own book, and he advocated just spending 15 minutes a day. And then the same thing is if you don’t like to actually write, you could speak it. And so just spend 15 minutes a day talking. And I guarantee you Within a very short time, you will have a book. Light Language Healing: An Energy Practice to Help You Get Unstuck So. All right, I, I think what I want to do right now, and, oh, I was working the other day and, and, and coming up with some ideas of how to introduce this and now I forgot to put it in my notes for today. So whatever, I’m just going to wing it as I usually do. Well, not really winging it. I want to share with you something that is near and dear to my heart, which in the context of what we’re talking about today, I, I think will be useful in helping you to be able to not stress over building a habit or starting a new habit, but to help you to just relax and maybe get clear on how you can start this habit. Maybe help you to come up with the idea of like, what’s one small step I can do today that will move me closer to my goal. So I want to share with you light language, which is a form of communication that is something that. It’s a sound, sound type of communication that resonates with your heart and your soul. And it’s not necessarily something that you are able to understand linguistically, let’s say. And I would encourage you to have an open mind when listening to it and an open heart also, and just set aside the next few minutes of just relaxing into what you hear me speak. I may speak, I may sing. I might do both. It’s sort of up to my higher self and my, my connection with the, with angels and, and other multi dimensional beings that are so wonderful to share this with me and with you. So what I would encourage you to do right now is if you are listening to this podcast and you are driving a car to pause and come back when you have a few minutes where you can just sit down and even close your eyes, just have an opportunity to just relax and, and yeah, and just, just be, be open to whatever comes through and set an intention that whatever you do here will be for your soul’s highest good. And that’s what I always ask for, and the highest good of all concerned. So, yeah, so sit back, take breath, and hope you will receive What I’m about to share with you with, with the, with the love that isn’t intended for, (audio only) What to Expect After a Light Language Session I hope you, hope that landed with you. And just know that and this is something that I, I, I tell my clients when, when they come in and do a, a one on one with is that it might be something that you might feel, you might feel something different later today or where you may, you may not have felt anything today and that’s okay too. And, but maybe in the next day or so you might suddenly have a new inspiration and if you do, please share it with me. If something like that happens, I would love to know. Yeah. How that worked out for you. That would be so good. And, and I’m, I’m put up on the, on the screen for, on the video here, but I’ll include this in my show notes today that if you ever would like to experience a little bit more of this personally one on one with me, I do offer a free introductory session. It’s a free 15 minute session and I’ll have the link to that in the show notes so you can, you can check that out. Accountability: The Missing Ingredient in Lasting Habit Change So see, I think, I think that’s going to probably wrap it up for me today. And I would encourage you to remember that you can absolutely succeed at forming new habits. Whatever you want to be able to do when you, you know, design them with a structure and some cues, you know, have those reminders, maybe on your phone and just take small, consistent actions. And one thing I neglected to mention at the beginning, accountability. Accountability is really helpful when you’re trying to start a new habit. So I’ve made myself accountable to you because I’ve declared it on this podcast today. So hold me to it. Find Your Accountability Partner — Someone Who Offers Tough Love with Kindness And also the, you know, it could be enrolling a good friend or maybe if you’re working with a coach already or a family member, let someone know this is what I’m trying to do and, and ask them to keep you accountable in a loving way. So make sure that you use some discernment with the person you’re going to pick for this because especially if this is something you’ve never done before. Let’s say you want someone, you want someone who can give you some tough love with love. Okay. Not be, I mean, unless you’re the type of person that really responds to, you know, someone being like a drill sergeant in your face. No judgment here. If not, maybe you need someone who can just lovingly kick you in the butt a little bit. And if you want me to be that person, you know, let Me know, I’m. I’m willing and able to. To help you with that as well. The Power of Group Training and Community Support Maybe join a group. You know, there are groups out there for different things. When, when I did my first marathon, I actually, I did it as a fundraiser, and it was for the. At the time, the very first one I did was for the American Heart association, and then the second one I did was for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. And what’s great about that is that we. I was training with a group of people, and so we helped to keep each other accountable, and we all showed up for the long runs together and we had different activities, you know, during the few months that it. That we took to train. And so being with a group of people. So whether it is a running group or maybe it is a support group for your. For food, whatever it is, get accountability. Get support. Because trying to start a new habit on your own can be daunting. And I apologize for not mentioning this at the beginning of the episode, but hopefully if you’ve stuck through and you’re listening to me now, you got it. So, yeah, get accountability. Get somebody, get a buddy at the very least to help you, and it will make your journey to accomplishing your goals so much easier to accomplish. Closing: You Are Never Too Old to Start a New Chapter Yeah, well, you know what I mean. Okay. All right. Thank you for being here and for listening and watching. And I will be back next week with some more ideas on how you can embrace this incredible season of life. And be sure to check out the description of this video for all the links that I was talking about today. And if you would be so kind as to share this with a friend on social media if you did enjoy it and let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I really love hearing from you, and it also helps me to figure out how I can best serve and support you going forward. So remember, you are never too old to start a new chapter.

What if the grief you’re carrying in midlife isn’t about your loss, but about the woman you’re becoming on the other side of it? In this episode, you’ll hear how a sacred retreat can foster sisterhood and healing to help you release what’s heavy so you can reconnect with your true self. If you’re a woman over 50 navigating loss – whether it’s a loved one, a relationship, an identity, or something else – you’ll want to tune in for this conversation as three of my trusted friends and fellow healers join me to explore our upcoming Good Grief Retreat. You’ll hear about the healing power of nature and why the mountains of North Carolina provide the perfect container for this work. We’ll also share some of the powerful retreat experiences we have planned, and how grief, when witnessed and honored, can become a doorway to deeper purpose, joy, and self-love. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why grief in midlife can be about growth—not just loss (and how it can clarify what’s real). How sacred space + sisterhood helps you heal faster than doing it alone (especially when you’ve been the strong one for everyone else). What it looks like to “let go” safely through rituals like a keening circle, light language, and gentle subconscious healing. How simple, soulful practices (labyrinth + creative honoring) can help you release, reconnect, and receive what’s next. About My Guests Katheryn Napier is a board-certified clinical hypnotist, Reiki master, and ordained minister with decades of experience helping people release trapped emotions, soothe the nervous system, and reconnect with inner wisdom. Patricia Alton is an advanced angel therapy practitioner, ordained shamanic minister, spiritual teacher, and Reiki master devoted to heart-centered healing and helping people feel less alone in their grief. Queen Jess Lee is a master spiritual channel, author, poet, and drama-therapy-trained facilitator who brings deep reverence for group healing, sacred land, and connection with the unseen (including loved ones who have crossed over). Resources & links mentioned: Learn more about the Good Grief Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Elizabeth Kübler-Ross – stages of grief – ekrfoundation.org Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT What If Grief Is Actually About Growth? An Introduction Gloria (Host): Namaste. What if the grief you experience as you go through midlife wasn’t about loss at all, but about growth? Grieving the loss of a loved one, a pet, or an identity actually can give you a chance to pause, reflect, and face what’s real so you can move forward with clarity and purpose. Sounds simple, right? Maybe. But it’s not so easy, especially if you do it alone. Gloria (Host): And that’s why today I am so excited to bring on three of my good friends and amazing women that I’m partnering with to host a grief retreat for women this June in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina here in the United States. So we are going to be talking about how we came up with this idea and why it’s a perfect place for women to gather, reflect, and heal. And I’m going to bring them all up right now and let them introduce themselves to you for a change, instead of me reading somebody’s bio like I normally do on this podcast. So let me see if I can add them to the stage. And there we go. Meet the Healing Team: Four Women Bringing Wisdom to the Retreat Katheryn Napier — Clinical Hypnotist & Reiki Master Gloria (Host): Welcome. Welcome. Katheryn and Patricia and Queen Jess Lee. So why don’t we start. I’m going to go around and just have you each say, you know, tell us, tell us a little bit about yourselves and where you are in the world right now. So I’m going to start with the woman on my left, although on your screen it might look like she’s on my right. So, Katheryn, I’m gonna go with you. I’m gonna pick on you first. Katheryn Napier: I’m Katheryn Napier. I’m a board certified clinical hypnotist and reiki master and ordained minister, and I’ve been doing it for over 30 years in Central Florida, and that’s pretty much all right. Patricia Alton — Angel Therapy Practitioner & Shamanic Minister Gloria (Host): Awesome. And then next to you, lovely lady Patricia. Patricia Alton: Good morning and welcome, everyone. I’m Patricia Alton and I am an advanced angel therapy practitioner, ordained shamanic minister, spiritual teacher, reiki master, and just here to help heal the world. Queen Jess Lee — Master Spiritual Channel & Author Gloria (Host): All right, and last but certainly not least, Queen Jess Lee: Hello. I’m Queen Jess Lee. I live in Asheville, North Carolina, very close to where the retreat will be. I am a master spiritual channel for over 20 years now, and I’m a author and poet and I am a mother. And so that is a little splash of me. Gloria (Host): And. And you’re. You’re also a daughter, aren’t you, of everybody on this show. Good point. Touche. Queen Jess Lee: My mother is here. She just spoke before me. Patricia. Hi, honey. Gloria (Host): You know, we’re all sisters. We’re all mothers here. Mothers and daughters. Absolutely. Yes, absolutely. And so y. Yes, Patricia. Patricia, for those of you who might not have caught that for sure, because I know Katheryn’s trying to be funny in there. I think. I think we all. Katheryn Napier: We’ll all adopt you, Jess. It’s okay. How the Good Grief Retreat Was Born: Three Years in the Making A Soul Sister Connection Over Lunch in Cassadaga, Florida Gloria (Host): So I. I thought we’d start off by having. Telling. Telling everyone who, you know, if you’re listening or watching us on. On YouTube today, where. How do we came up this. With this idea. And, and actually, my. My dear friend Patricia, she and I were the ones who sort of brainstormed this. And then we. Then we brought these other lovely ladies in. In along and we’ll. We’ll talk to them about why they decided to do that. So can you tell us a little bit about how we came up with this idea? Patricia Alton: Yes. Thank you, Gloria. Well, it’s been three years in the making. In September of 2023, Gloria and I were having lunch at Sinatra’s Restaurant in the renowned Cassadaga Spiritual center in Lake Helen, Florida. Well, in doing so, we got in delve deep into what was going on in our lives and in the world. And wouldn’t you know that we started to really feel so connected that we wanted to share. And one thing that we shared were our personal losses. And in doing so, we felt a connection, a deep connection, a soul sister connection. And then by the end of our lunch, we said, wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could gather a team together, you, me, and let’s see, who else would be perfect to perhaps do a retreat? And then we came up with. Okay, we were thinking, let’s make it kind of fun and light and not just heavy. So we came up with Good Grief Retreat, and we did kind of think of the Snoopy and Peanuts character. And we just thought, this could be a lot of fun. There’s fun and healing in sharing together. So we thought, first of all, Katheryn Napier, whom I had the honor of leading 11 retreats with for over a decade, and with her healing modalities, combined with my beautiful daughter Jessica, who I’ve also led retreats with, and we’ve done spirit circles together online. Would they consider it? Absolutely. Gloria (Host): Yeah, absolutely. And I just want to also show this, too, because we. I found this wonderful little book that does show that, you know, it’s. It’s goodness and good grief. Yeah, exactly. So it’s. Yeah, we. It was so wonderful how we came up with this idea and, and just, I mean, right then and there at that luncheon, we even were like coming up with activities not only that we each could do, but that also that we thought Katheryn and Jess could do as well. And we. And we just thought that it would. It was just going to be amazing. Why Katheryn and Jess Joined the Retreat Team Gloria (Host): So let me. Before we get to where we’re going to go, but I think let’s. Let’s talk a little bit about maybe have each of you, like Katheryn and Jess, talk about when we finally, when we did come up with you, or go to you and say, hey, you know, we have this idea. What do you think? So what. What made you decide to jump on board? Katheryn? I’ll go. I’ll go with you first. Katheryn Napier: Well, I. I felt like I was honored at completely by being even asked, but I. I feel like I work with people in their subconscious mind where the traumas and the fears are actually stored. And in doing so, with my hypnosis training, I’m able to release that trapped emotions that are so deep down inside of people. And healing occurs, and people are set free from their traumas and their grief. I feel I bring to the table. Gloria (Host): I love that. Yeah. And how about you, Jess? Queen Jess Lee: Well, deep healing processes are one of my favorites. I trained in drama therapy for 13 years, and I was going through multiple processes of healing and release work. And so that’s one gift that I have in my being. I love the group process. I love working with women, my favorite population. I’ve been working with women from children on up, so all my life. And this team also drew me because I know that we work very well together, and we’ve done many connective experiences together. And so we have a deep history that feels like a beautiful foundation for a retreat. Also being very deeply connected with the Light Center. I’ve been going there since the 1990s, so that place itself is rooted in my history around healing and just how place heals. Just nature heals. Just being there and being a medium and working with the other side and working with loved ones who crossed over. Not that that’s the only thing that we grieve, but I see how that world can be very alive. And so there’s a beauty in the connection with the unseen. And I think that’s a gift also that I bring to the table and love to access. And I feel like it’s something that I will definitely offer during the retreat is that connection with the unseen. And so I’m super attracted to this work on multiple levels. And so I feel like it is just magnetic. And I’m so glad to be a part of this team. Light Language and Energy Healing: Gloria’s Contribution to Grief Work Gloria (Host): I Love it. Yeah. And I know, I’m grateful that both of you were able to come into this idea that Patricia and I came up with to do this, because I really do feel that we’ve got just such a wonderful, You know what? Mosaic. Yeah, I think that’s the word that comes to mind because I’m trying to think, you know, because we all bring, we all have different gifts now for those of you who are wondering about me, and if you haven’t, if you’re not a longtime viewer or subscriber of the podcast. So, so for me, what I bring is sharing light language. And I found that that is, is a really powerful modality in helping to release similar to what, what Katheryn. Katheryn does it through hypnosis. I do it through light language and releasing energetic blocks and helping you to, to be able to let go of some of the grief and, and to be able to really to, to heal. And, and, and as you say, you know, or as I mentioned at the beginning, it’s not, it’s certainly we’re definitely going to be focusing in on losing, you know, grief over losing loved ones, but there’s a lot of other things that people grieve and, and even sometimes it’s just the way you’re, you’re living or losing a relationship maybe, or a change in that or becoming an empty nester, all these different things. And, and they all bring up. Feelings of loss. And so that’s what we’re here to be able to help you to do so to be. Manage it and, and grow from it. Why Black Mountain, North Carolina Is the Perfect Healing Retreat Location Ancient Sacred Land, Mountain Healing, and the Lodge Gloria (Host): As I mentioned in the beginning, I think one thing we did, we, we sort, we just hinted on a little bit because when I showed the picture of the, the light center. But Patricia, maybe you want to talk about a little bit about why we decided to have the retreat in, in North Carolina, specifically Black Mountain and the lodge and I might even share some more pictures of this wonderful place that we’re hosting it at. Patricia Alton: There’s such a healing in the mountains. And each one of us have experienced a deep connection with Mother Nature. And that’s where the root of all healing, I believe, begins. This is a safe, sacred space. There’s no one around us. The lodge is like walking into Grandmother’s cabin. It just feels like a warm embrace. There’s the fireplace in our meeting room where we’ll be gathering. And outside is the forest. And there are hundreds and hundreds of acres. And there’s the Smoky Mountains in the background. This is ancient sacred land. It also needs healing from the devastating Hurricane Helene, two years ago, and it’s still being healed. And Black Mountain did suffer a lot, but fortunately, the lodge was untouched. This is where we will be staying. It will be home for three days, four nights of sharing, caring, and compassionate healing. Retreat Activities: Ancient Rituals and Modern Healing Practices Walking the Labyrinth by Candlelight: A Sacred Pilgrimage Ritual Gloria (Host): Absolutely. And. And one of the. One of the activities that we’re even going to be doing as well is walking labyrinth. And it’s. Who. Who wants to maybe, because I know, I know, Patricia, you. You’ve done labyrinth. How about you, Jess? Maybe you want to speak to. Why is it. What’s the benefit of walking a labyrinth? And what does it mean? Queen Jess Lee: It’s a very beautiful way of. Well, you know, historically, people walk the labyrinth to emanate the pilgrimage. And when people are walking to holy sites, they. If they couldn’t get to do that, they would walk the labyrinth. And so it’s. It’s rooted in history. It’s very sacred. And so I believe that, you know, we give the guidelines of, like, oh, you’re walking in, opening up to what you’re going to release in the center. And then I like the idea of when you come out, what are you bringing in? So, yet I honor everybody’s journey because maybe somebody needs to do it differently. And so it’s a very powerful ritual. And it. And I. The word that comes, I channel for you is like, it activates. It activates great healing and releasing and. Yeah. Deep healing work. And the way that each of us come to the table, so unique. And the way that you experience the labyrinth is a unique experience. And so afterwards is just as powerful. Just like speaking, what did this mean to me? How did I interact? I walked barefoot on it today. You know, go slow. Did I go fast? Like, everybody’s journey is so specific to them, and it’s really just like our. Our loss journeys. Right. They’re also unique to us, and yet we find ourselves so deeply connected through our loss. And I believe that these shared experiences connect us and root us as a. You know, I’m hearing the word soul group we become because we are called here, our souls are called to the experience. And so that’s the wondrous thing, is that, you know, our stories will have notes of the same symphony. Like, oh, wow, you experienced that. Wow. And, and. And so, yeah, and I hear the word bedrock. It’s a bedrock of foundation for new relationships. And I believe the labyrinth is such a representation of. Of that and of how we’ll each experience the same thing, but in our own unique way. The Sacred Dome and Sacred Geometry at the Retreat Center Gloria (Host): Absolutely. I love that. Thanks so much. And yeah, Patricia, you look like you wanted to add on to that, too. Patricia Alton: The dome. This, the labyrinth is just outside of the dome. And we will be doing the labyrinth at night by candlelight, with a bonfire close by. And if you could share the picture of the inside of the dome, this is a sacred space. Domes are based on sacred geometry, which is the language of creation. It’s all of the different geometric designs found in nature that created the universe. There’s nothing really quite as sacred is going into a dome. And Katheryn and I right now are coming from the dome into land which I have the honor of calling my home. And it is the sister to the dome in Black Mountain. So there you are. You’ll have the experience in Black Mountain and then also come visit in DeLand as well. Gloria (Host): I love that. I love that. Yeah. It is quite a remarkable structure. And if you’ve never experienced one, I encourage you to do that. And. And I should also let folks know, especially if you’re listening as opposed to watching this, that if you want to learn more information about the retreat, you can go to goodgriefretreat.net and I will have that in the show notes, so don’t pan panic, but as well. But you can. You’ll be able to get all the information about all the different activities that we’re going to be doing at the retreat, and it has more information about the lodge and the different type, excuse me, types of accommodations that they have there. And. And I should also mention that space is limited, is that we are limiting it to 15 women because one of the things that we want to do. Well, number one, it’s going to be much more intimate to have that. Wisdom Circles: Intimate Small-Group Healing Sessions Gloria (Host): And one of the things that I know, Patricia, you and I had talked about would be to have like these little wisdom circles where we would each get to work with a few of women and be able to share, you know, our own thoughts about healing and grief and things like that. Katheryn, have you. Have you given any thought to what you would share yet in. In one of those wisdoms? Katheryn Napier: I would like to offer my services for hypnosis, for relaxation and accessing their inner wisdom and higher self. It’s a great avenue for doing that with hypnosis or perhaps relishing the chakras or with hypnosis and then go to your higher self. It’s great. Transition. Understanding Hypnosis for Grief: What Clinical Hypnotherapy Actually Is Gloria (Host): Awesome. Yeah, I know. I can imagine that it’s going to be really beneficial for people. Can you? You know what I think for some people, I mean, I think people have an idea about what hypnosis is. But sometimes they also get it confused with, like, stage hypnosis. Could you explain a little bit more about what you would be doing? That would be different? Katheryn Napier: Yeah, well, stage hypnosis is like one in a hundred. Is that susceptible to suggestion? But what I do on the clinical level, spiritual level, is by accessing. And I’m very respectful of that. I don’t like to go into the stage type hypnosis. Hypnosis is more like a daydreaming state. Like when you get on a highway and you drive, and all of a sudden you’re at your destination, you don’t know how you got there. They actually call that highway hypnosis. And it helps people to get. Come in line with it. I. It’s much easier to drift into a deep level of hypnosis if you’re in a relaxed situation like the one we’ll be in here. And people can either use it as an opportunity to meditate deeply or to allow themselves to go into deep hypnosis either way, you know, so it’s not a positive thing that people have to make that decision about. They can just meditate if they like. Gloria (Host): I love that. Yeah. Thank you so much. I think that’s helpful because I know there are people have. They have maybe some preconceived. Right. Yeah. Preconceived ideas about what it is. And. And. But it really is. It’s just relaxing and allowing yourself to. Yeah. To. To connect with your. Your inner self, which is something I always like to tell people. That’s so important to be able to do. Creating a Soul Altar to Honor Loved Ones and Heal Through Grief Gloria (Host): Patricia, I know one of the things that you talked about that you wanted to offer at the retreat was something that sounds really cool to me is can you talk a little bit about the thing that you. That you wanted to do? Patricia Alton: Yes. Honoring our loved ones will be a big part of the retreat. And one thing that we will be creating is actually a soul altar. And I have an example of one that I did for my beloved cousin who passed two years ago. And this is just such a treasure to me because it’s portable. I can fold it up and carry it in a notebook, my journal, and keep it close to my heart. And when I open it up and look at her picture, I just feel such a connection with her. And I thought this would be a wonderful, creative. Get lost in it. Almost like a soul collage, if you will. And the reason why I call it an altar is because it is honoring our loved one. And it’s also something that we can carry close and have in our hearts. Gloria (Host): Can you describe a little bit more about what’s inside, especially for those people who are not, who are listening to this podcast and so they don’t, they don’t have the benefit of being able to actually see, see what you have there. Patricia Alton: Oh, good point. It is very visual. Well, first of all, what we will do is invite people to bring a photo of their loved one who they would love to honor and be connected with. And of course, it can be a person, place, or even a thing and whatever they feel they really want to honor on this very special retreat and hold close in their heart and have a memorable, actually it is a memorable honoring altar to have with them that they can carry in their journal. And what this one has is a picture of my beloved cousin and then words from her funeral service that I pasted all up and throughout the whole, throughout the whole altar. And it actually looks sort of like a church, it looks like a chapel and it’s a trifold. And we will be creating it with sacred items, scripture, also any words of encouragement that we’ll be bringing. So it really is a soul collage. It, if you’d want to, you know, get a better understanding of it. Gloria (Host): Oh, I love that. Yeah, I think it’s going to be very cool. And, and it really is. You have it shaped the, the way you, you cut it out and everything that it does look like a, like a little, little altar and, and it is this wonderful trifold that you can open up and see inside. So. Yeah, because we, we love. I know one of the things that I’m so blessed that number one that I got to know you through, Katheryn actually, because she had invited me to your one day retreat many years ago. And I know one of the things that you like to do at these retreats is to do some sort of craft. And I’ve made lots of very cool things over the years at them and I have some of them hanging up in my, my office in fact right now. Creative Expression and Sacred Craft as Part of the Grief Healing Process Gloria (Host): So, so I think maybe, maybe you can. I don’t know, I want to be able to have just talk as well. But I don’t know. What do you all think about the activity? And. Well, just because you’re talking about writing as well, doing something creative, what do you think about that is as a way to be able to foster healing. Who wants to. Queen Jess Lee: Go ahead, Jess. A little bit is that these become spiritual tools, right? Like craft is like putting it together, but these become representations of like pieces of our spirit and, and they become highly energetic, especially with the Intentions that we put into these sacred objects. And that’s what we’re really doing is creating sacred objects for us to honor our loss and also to rejoice over our losses. Right. It’s that continuum of what the grieving process is because it’s. It’s part of it is celebration. Right. And honoring the pain. And I believe us connecting with. It’s a beautiful connection with creation. Right. It’s creation and then loss and wow. Something to step to represent something that we’ve lost. It’s pretty powerful when you hear it that way, you know, and just intentions. Touch of, you know, the beauty. Beauty that is the grieving process too. Gloria (Host): Absolutely. Katheryn, you were, you were, you were saying something there. Can you want to elaborate a little more? What do you think? Katheryn Napier: I was feeling that she presented it so well and the energy she puts into anything she does is amazing. So I thoroughly think that brings a lot to the table. Morning Meditations and Daily Rituals to Start Each Retreat Day Gloria (Host): Yeah. Is. Is there anything else any of you can think of that we need to. That I maybe have forgotten? But what else. What other important points do you think we should. Katheryn Napier: Meditations. Okay. It’s just starting the day off with bright, sunny ideas. Whoever does it will. It will be a wonderful thing. Just starting off with the morning meditations. The Keening Circle: An Ancient Celtic Grief Tradition for Deep Emotional Release Queen Jess Lee: Yeah. Share a little bit about the process of a keening circle. I was just thinking that I love when we’re. I love when we’re in sync. Perfect. Yes. Talk about that. Yeah. Well, we live in a society that unfortunately stuffs grief in. We’re rather death defying and it’s like, oh, no, you’ll get over it. You know, when are you going to get over it? And you never get over it. You never get over loss. It’s always. It comes. Restructure becomes part of you. Yeah. A keening circle is an ancient Celtic tradition of grieving. The loss that we have experienced and the way we do it is through literally opening up our hearts and souls, becoming raw and open. And we will be in a safe, sacred container. You’ll be supported by four of us who know what it’s like to grieve deeply and also how to hold you in sacred space. And then with the four of us together leading it. And Gloria will be opening the circle with her beautiful light language, which is connected with the divine, which is very unique in itself. And then we will begin to open up and we will be leading and facilitating the grief circle process, which we will just open up and we can let it all hang out. And trust me, we will. Retreat Logistics: Space, Meals, and What to Expect Intimate Gathering for 15 Women: Catered Meals and Mountain Accommodations Queen Jess Lee: And we will be healed. And transformed from it. And we’ll get our tummies full with our breakfasts and lunches and dinners. Gloria (Host): I was like, that’s why I want to bring that up. We are going to have. Yes, meals will be provided for sure, and they will be catered to an exceptional chef from Asheville. And I’m not going to mention names yet because we’re still in the process of. Of confirming that. But I understand that this company that we’re considering offers amazing food that is delectable for all. Holding Sacred Space: Honoring Every Stage of the Grief Journey Gloria (Host): Absolutely. And, you know, one thing I think, actually, I think Kathryn, you just brought this up. I think one thing I want to stress, too, is that we really are. Well, and Patricia, you also talked about this, that we really are endeavoring to provide a really safe container for. For you to be able to honor your feelings, you know, whatever stage of grief you’re in. Because there are. There are many stages. In fact, I know there’s a. What is that? Elizabeth Kubler Ross, I guess wrote. Wrote a book about the different stages of grief. So no matter what stage you’re in, we’re going to honor that and respect it and want you to know that you, you know, if you don’t feel like crying, you don’t have to cry. If you do feel like crying, go ahead. If you feel like screaming, you know, we’re out in the woods. I think it’ll probably be fine. Queen Jess Lee: I really want to speak unto what you just said because, yes, sacred space, but also the word space. Because, yes, we have planned a lot of wonderful things for you, but sometimes what happens is you don’t know what’s going to happen in between the activities. Right. You know, where you sit, where you’re sitting on a rock in some free time, and then you have the most powerful, potent experience, and it is creating. Creating that sacred space and that, you know, the dome, I mean, the dome gets extended all the way around us in this. I could see it now, just like this light dome, that it’s going to hold us like a womb of protection and all of us become mothers, sisters, you know, friends during that time. And that womb becomes a beautiful healing place of what, exactly? What you said, whatever you need and intend for this to be for you. And so it feels very special. And all of us know how to hold space. Yeah. And so we’ve been doing it for years. And so we are so excited to meet you. Gloria (Host): I know. Yeah. I’m just doing this interview with you, with all of you again. It’s just like. It’s just really Bringing up this excitement and. And I just can’t wait. I really can’t wait. And I hope that. I hope that you’re feeling that, because we. Finding Sisterhood in Midlife: You Are Not Alone in Your Grief Gloria (Host): We. We all love each other, and we are going to provide that to you as well. You know, we. We are all one, and. And we just want to be able to be that place where you can feel safe, to feel whatever you’re feeling and. And be able to have some fun. Have some fun, too, and hopefully make some new friends. Because, you know, no matter what age you are, but especially, I think as you get into midlife, sometimes it’s harder to make new friends. I read a lot. I’m in, like, lots of different groups on Facebook, and I’ll hear women complaining about that they don’t. They aren’t able to make friends anymore as they get older. So this is a perfect opportunity for you to come and meet some new people and make new friends. I’m open to making new friends because I would love it. You know, what do you all have to say about that? Patricia Alton: I would like to speak to everyone out there who feels alone, and that’s what I hear a lot, that people are feeling alone in their grief and they are lost. And we invite you, each one of us invites you to come in to be with us and find your sisterhood and know that you are not alone and that we are here to hear your stories, to listen deeply from our compassionate hearts. Wow. And to be there for you through it all. Gloria (Host): I want to hug. Oh, awesome. Oh. You know what? I think this has been amazing. Final Thoughts: Why You Should Give Yourself the Gift of This Retreat Katheryn’s Closing Message: Releasing Trapped Emotions and Healing Gloria (Host): So I’m going to go around one more time and just have each of you just say one last thing, maybe speak from the heart of why you. Why someone should come, or just what you wish for them. So, Katheryn, I’ll. I’ll start with you. What’s your last between the four of us? Katheryn Napier: The inner healing. One way or the other, you will be healed. Releasing those trapped emotions that. And using new loving emotions to replace the old emotions. I think this is an opportunity where one can’t get you, the other one will. You can’t escape. You will be healed. Patricia’s Closing Message: Love Yourself and Come as You Are Gloria (Host): I love it. How about you, Patricia? What’s your last thought on the eve of Valentine’s Day? Patricia Alton: Share the love. And just know that each and every one of you will feel the love from each one of us. And it’s time for you to honor yourself, Love yourself, and come and join us, please. We welcome you. Thank you. Jess Lee’s Closing Message: The Magic of the Group Healing Process Gloria (Host): I love that. Absolutely. And Jess. And you know, today is Galentine’s day. So. Women’s retreat. So it’s, you know, it’s interesting. Queen Jess Lee: I, I feel like just the power of the group process, it is pure magic. It is. It has literally shifted my trajectory in life multiple times and has opened up my being to so many possibilities and opportunities and connections. And we are, we are your healing team. And you, those who are meant to be with us, will be there. And we open our magnets wide for that beautiful magnetism and trust and know that I, I know you’re ready to join us. I know you’re ready. And we are so excited to give you a hug. Me, absolutely hug you in person. So, yeah, appreciate it. Gloria’s Closing: Retreat as a Gift of Self-Love and Self-Care Gloria (Host): Well, thank you so much, all three of you, for joining me today. It’s been wonderful. And I, I also want to just echo, I think what Patricia was saying is that think about this really as a gift to yourself, a gift of self love, of self care. Retreats are a wonderful way for you to be able to do that. We all need some me time once in a while. And so take a break from your busy life and come spend the weekend with us and give yourself that gift. I think, I know, I know that you won’t regret it. I’m sure of that. Absolutely. So thank you again, ladies, for being here. And I do want to thank all of you for joining me today on the podcast and whether you’re listening, hope you’re subscribed if you’re not already, and make sure that, and you can, if you’re subscribed, make sure you’re subscribed on YouTube as well. The link is down there. And I will be back next week with some more ideas on how you can make this next chapter of your life the best one yet. Learn More and Register: Good Grief Retreat Details Visit goodgriefretreat.net for full details on accommodations, activities, and registration. Space is limited to 15 women — June 2026, Black Mountain, North Carolina.

When life feels scattered after 50, your instinct might be to “fix” everything fast – your relationships, your work, your next step. But what if it’s not about fixing what’s broken? Maybe it’s about removing what’s blocking the real you from emerging. If you’re a woman over 50 whose life looks “fine” on the outside yet inside, something feels unsettled, foggy, or unfinished, you’ll want to listen today. We explore why midlife transitions like empty nest, divorce, identity changes can make your world feel chaotic, and how you can lean into the first pillar of the L.O.V.E. Method – “Let go and Let God” for support. I’ll share how Michael Singer’s teachings on removing blocks instead of fixing problems inspired this episode, and why midlife chaos is often an invitation to rediscover who you are beneath the roles you’ve played. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why midlife chaos isn’t “you falling apart” – it’s often your soul asking for recalibration Why asking “Why am I not okay?” instead of “How do I fix this?” changes everything How “Let Go and Let God” can become “Let go and let God emerge through you,” by releasing the inner blocks that keep you disconnected from yourself Simple ways to make space for clarity (even if you don’t meditate How Light Language serves as energetic support to help release what’s keeping you stuck If you stopped trying to “fix” your life for a moment… what truth might finally have room to find you? Resources & links mentioned: Michael Singer Podcast: Allowing Life to Remove Your Blockages Gloria’s Book: “Live Love Engage: How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself” Pam Gregory YouTube Channel: @PamGregoryOfficial Lee Harris website: leeharrisenergy.com Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Explore 1:1 coaching and energy healing at gloriarand.com Learn more and secure your spot for the June, 2026 Good Grief Women’s Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Get my free Personal Power Archetype Quiz: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to Design Your Life, Your Way so you never miss an episode. Share this conversation with a friend who’s navigating grief, transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. TRANSCRIPT Opening and Welcome Namaste. It’s not unusual for your life to feel a bit scattered after you turn 50. You know, we’re dealing with a lot of life challenges, like your kids leave home or your relationship with a spouse changes. Maybe one of you retires and is home all the time. Maybe you’re feeling like there’s something inside of you, like your soul is calling you to do something. Even though you, you’re probably quite happy with their life the way it is, but there’s still this little niggling inside of you that says there’s something more. You need to be doing something. Even though you, you’re probably quite happy with their life the way it is, but there’s still this little niggling inside of you that says there’s something more. You need to be doing something else or something in addition. But there’s something more, but you don’t know what it is. And that can be extremely frustrating. I know, I’ve been there. So we’re going to be talking about this today. We’re going to be talking about how to find some clarity in that chaos and how the L in my love method, L. O. V. E. love is an acronym, can actually help you do that. What is the L.O.V.E. Method? So if you are new to the podcast, you know, I’m not, I’m not new to podcasting, but this iteration is new. So you may not know what the love method is. What the heck is that? Well, it’s something that I wrote about in my best selling book, Live Love Engage how to stop doubting yourself and start being yourself. And I’ll just go through it briefly because we’re going to focus on only we’re going to focus on the L today. So the L stands for let go and let God. The O is open your heart to receive. The V is value your uniqueness. And the E is embrace your divinity. And I’m not even going to telling you how this all came to be either right now, but maybe, maybe another episode. I will, but we’re just gonna go, go back through this. Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs After 50 So I, I said that. So the L, we’re going to start right there to the L. When I wrote the book in particular, and this is going back, I started working on the book seriously in like 2019, 2020. And to me at the time, Let Go and Let God was about letting go of limiting beliefs, letting go of attachment to the outcome. And, and that’s still what it is. And when you do that, when you can let go of limiting beliefs that for instance, that you’re too old to do something, maybe you have, maybe you had an old dream that you put on the shelf to do other stuff like work on a career or raise a family or something like that. In fact, a couple episodes ago I talked about age in that context. So it’s, it can be about letting go of limiting beliefs. And, and when you can do that, it does help you. When you can then let, let turn it over to God or your higher power universe, however you want to call it. That’s. That is that first step in being able to start having some clarity. There’s more to it than that, obviously, but that’s a start. A New Understanding: Let Go and Let God Emerge But what I realized today, and, and that’s what’s so beautiful. It’s so beautiful about life and, and, and even having, having this wonderful gift of the love method that came to me way back when in 2016, as a matter of fact, is that it continually evolves. I am always peeling back the layers like an onion and realizing that there’s more to it. My Morning Walk and Michael Singer’s Wisdom So today I go for a walk every morning, so just to set the stage on most mornings, if the weather is decent. And so I went out for a walk this morning and I like to listen to usually some type of inspirational messaging or videos maybe on YouTube. I, I like listening to Pam Gregory sometimes. She’s an astrologer. I like Lee Harris. He’s someone who channels. And I wasn’t finding anything good as I was going through there until I happened to come across a Michael Singer podcast. And I’ve read a couple of. I think I’ve read three of his books. I, I think I own two of them. So if you, if you don’t know who Michael Singer is, I highly recommend you check him out. He’s a wonderful author. He’s follows the Buddhist philosophy. He actually lives here in Florida. I actually got to meet him in person one time. I attended his services that he hosts on, on Sundays. Why Am I Not Okay? The Question That Changes Everything And so I’m listening to this podcast and he is talking about why what we do when we’re not feeling okay and how we look for things to fix us, you know, or. But we’re basically putting a band aid on it. So, for example, say that you are in this challenge right now where you’re unhappy in your marriage. I can relate to that. I, I felt that way for a long time. And you just, you know, you’re so unhappy. So you’re not okay because you’re unhappy. And so you just decide, okay, that’s it. You know what? I’m gonna end this marriage right now. I’m gonna go get a divorce. Well, in the podcast, he’s saying, you’re just, that’s just how to fix. I’m not okay. Isn’t the question that we should be asking Instead, the question we should be asking is why am I not okay? Because that’s a different answer. You know, the how is just the, you know, how do I fix this? How do I fix this? But why am I feeling this way? And I encourage you to even think about this right now. If your life is feeling a bit chaotic and it’s feeling scattered and you don’t know where to find your, your North Star, you’ve lost it somewhere. Ask yourself why. My Personal Story: Forgetting to Love Myself So for me, especially where it related to my marriage, my. Why was that? I had, I had forgotten. I’d forgotten that I was just as important in this marriage, frankly. Yeah, I’m getting teary eyed. So that, that leads me to. I’m on the right track here. I’d forgotten who I was. And, and the reason I’d forgotten is I’d stopped loving myself. I wasn’t putting myself first. I was always just going along with the flow. Whatever he wanted was fine. And rarely, I mean, occasionally I would say this is what I wanted, but more often than not, I was just putting up with stuff. I was settling and that’s not a good way to be. Removing the Blocks: The Michelangelo Analogy So anyway, so he’s talking about. Yeah, so asking yourself, why? Why am I not okay? And then he started talking about, Why are we not okay? Is because there are blocks. And, and yeah, and I had put up a big block of where I’d forgotten who I was really. And I, I had blocked off the part of me that loved me, you know, that loving, loving myself. And so he then uses the analogy of Michelangelo and how he, you know, he, when he was sculpting something that he, he saw in his mind’s eye what it was. But he had to, he, he would just remove everything that wasn’t part of that finished sculpture. And so we have to remove those blocks to let ourselves emerge. Which gets me back to the L in the love method. Because what I realized today and listening to him, see if I can. Now that I’m thinking about it, I should make a note that. To put the link to that episode in the show notes today, that would probably be helpful. I think it’ll be helpful for you. So I want to find that my little Singer one. I’ll see if I can find it and put it in the show notes. I want to take a note right now. Oh, I’m thinking about it so I don’t forget about it. Let Go and Let God Emerge: A Fresh Perspective Anyway, so the L, it dawned on me was to let go and let God emerge. Because Michael Singer says that, you know, he believes that we Are God. And so when we remove those blocks, it’s. For me, again, what I felt is that I am letting God emerge from me. And. And I know some people are like, oh, how can you say that’s blasphemous? I’m not God. Well, I think Jesus said it. Well, you know, I am the vine and you are the branches. Yeah. Think of it as that God is. Is the vine or a tree. Let’s be even more majestic about it. God is a tree and we are the branches. So. The tree has, you know, trees have branches and that’s what all of us are. I mean. I mean, okay, heck, you know, we talk about a family tree, don’t we, Right? And all of these different relatives are part of our family tree. Well, I believe now, this is. Again, this is my belief. You can take it or leave it. It’s okay if, you know, if you’re atheist or whatever, it’s okay, you know, but this is my belief that God is the head of my family tree. And. And so, yes. So then all of the people that I’m related to are all of the different branches. And, and if we trace back generations, you know, we’re all. We are all related at some point. We are all humans and we all share the same DNA that, you know, the. Those basic molecules that we are made of, they may look differently, I think, maybe, possibly, or in different orders. I don’t remember exactly my biology, so I don’t want to. I don’t want to go that far, but. But you get my drift, right? We’re all human beings. We’re all flesh and blood. We all have. No matter what the outside of us may look like inside. Inside we are very close to being alike. But we have different upbringings. We have different. We’re related to different people. We came from different parts of the world. And so that does create this unique tapestry that we are all woven a part of. And. How to Find Clarity Through Chaos at Midlife Okay, so how do I get back to finding the clarity right through chaos? What does let go and let God emerge have to do with all this? Gloria, I will tell you. I will tell you. So. The Power of Allowing and Accepting When you can let go of the things that let go of these blocks, let go of the. Let go of the things that bother you. And I know that sounds easily said than done, right? Yeah. But when I say let go, it’s more about allowing and accepting. It’s about. It’s just about allowing whatever is bothering you to be there to make friends with it or at least just acknowledge it and just say, okay, I See you, I feel you, and just let it be part of you. Because when you get into this, I gotta fix it and I gotta make it go away. And I don’t want to feel this way. And believe me, I’ve been there. I was having that a little bit last week, as a matter of fact. What you resist, persists. It’s true. It’s true. What you resist, persists. Be Still and Know: Creating Space for Clarity So just notice it instead. Notice when you’re feeling frustrated. Notice when you’re feeling sad. Notice when you’re feeling scattered. Notice when you’re feeling like, I know there’s more to life, but I don’t know what it is. Okay, notice it, sit with it and be still. And know. It’s a great phrase. Be still, Allowing yourself that time to just sit with whatever is going on. Not to engage it, not to try to fix it, but just to allow it into your life. It gives you space to then let it go. Give it up to God or source, whatever, and just say, I. I don’t know why I’m feeling this way. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what my life’s purpose is. I know there should something more. I know I. I feel like I should be doing something else, but I don’t know what it is. And then just say, okay, you know what? Yeah, that’s how I feel. Help. And then just kind of like, okay, I’m gonna just. I’m just gonna let it. Let it be. It’s Okay to Not Know Your Next Step And give yourself that grace to not know. Like, I’ve been talking about this. I think. I think in that same episode, one of the other ones I’ve talked about, you know, it’s okay to not know. It’s okay not to know your next step. Sometimes that’s how you find the clarity, is by not knowing. In fact, I would say a lot of times that’s how you find the clarity is first you got to just accept that you don’t know. I don’t know what I don’t know. And then that gives space for God, your higher self to emerge, ideas to emerge. Opening Your Heart to Receive Ideas and Inspiration And then you can get into the O of love, which is open your heart to receive. And then you open your heart to receive these ideas. As I tell you, some of my best ideas have come while I’ve been meditating. And I know not everybody likes to meditate. And. And you may have this idea of meditating is just sitting in a fetal position, you know, and going home. That’s nice. I actually listened to an OM video this morning while I was meditating. But it could be simply going for a walk, it could be taking a bath, taking a shower. I’ve had ideas come into my head while I’m in the shower. Really great ideas when you focus on something else. And this is where that wonderful practice of mindfulness comes in. When you focus on, are being mindful about doing the dishes, let’s say, where you’re really concentrating on washing each dish and getting all the food off and then rinsing it. And that’s all you’re focusing on. It frees up the brain to then come up with wonderful ideas for you. And, and that’s where then that clarity comes through. Because trying to force it sometimes you might be able to get solutions that way. But really it’s going to be stressful and it’s going to be. I, I believe, and again, this is just my belief in my experience that it takes a lot longer that way. But when you just let go and let God emerge, then that’s where that clarity comes from. So it really starts with letting go. And. Navigating Loss and Life Transitions After 50 One of the challenges that also happens to all of us as we get older, certainly, and, and women in particular is that one of the things, I think one of the triggers, I think that causes us to start re examining our life and saying is this all there is is when we go through some type of loss, whether it is losing a spouse, losing a significant loved one, a family member, losing a really good friend, maybe someone you’ve known since childhood and, and, and, and now they’ve, you know, the transitions, whether suddenly or, or not, maybe they’ve had a long illness or maybe you, you’ve, maybe you’ve been working at a corporate job and you’ve been downsized. That’s no fun. That can make you start to really grieve that loss of identity or becoming an empty nester. All of these things can cause this chaos and cause your life to feel scattered. Introducing the Good Grief Retreat for Women Over 50 And my good friend Patricia Alton and I were talking about this a few years ago and especially because we, you know, had come out of COVID and, and real. And just all the things that were going on, they’re still even going on in our world right now. A lot of anxiety, a lot of frustration, a lot of division, especially here in the United States where I live, and a lot of grief. People were feeling a lot of grief. And, and, and women in particular. Well, yeah, it’s probably an equal opportunity, but we’re women. We want to serve women. So we came up with this wonderful idea to plan a retreat where Women, because this is for women. Because we do have a. A lodge that we’re hosting the retreat at in North Carolina, and that it’s a. An opportunity for women to come together and get some healing and some renewal. Reframing Grief as Growth and Transformation And I saw a lovely comment today about grief, and they were talking about a book, but it, it really struck me because I know some people see. They see good grief retreat, which is the name of our retreat, and they think, ah, grief. I don’t know that that’s something I want to deal with. I don’t know that I want to, you know, spend a weekend talking about grief. You know, it seems kind of heavy, and I get that, and it can be. And I invite you to consider it differently. And what this person posted today was that it’s not about grief. It’s about growth. It’s about choosing to pause, reflect, and face what’s real so you can move forward with clarity and purpose. And that’s what we’re going to be doing. That’s what we’re going to help the wonderful women who come to our retreat. We have room for 15 people, and it’s going to be at the end of June in North Carolina, in the mountains in North Carolina. You can go to goodgrief retreat.net and get all the information about it. And, and actually on an upcoming episode of design your life your way, I am going to be interviewing the other three facilitators of our wonderful retreat, and we’re going to go into more detail about what you can expect. So if you’re not subscribed to the podcast yet, you might want to do that now so that you will be notified when that episode drops. So if you want to learn more, because of course you can learn about the retreat on the website, but this way you’ll get a chance to meet all of us. And hopefully, if you resonate with one or more of us, then it will. You may feel that call to sign up and. And come join us. Additional Practices for Finding Clarity: Meditation and Journaling So, yeah, that’s what I want to talk about today. So I want to talk about one other thing, actually, about how also that you can help. Another way that I’ve found to help gain some clarity when your life is feeling scattered. And that’s through a practice in addition to meditation, which I definitely believe is a great way to, you know, to be still. And also journaling is another one that I love to do, too, where you can really get in touch with that inner part of you that the. The inner wisdom that you have inside of you that sometimes needs a Little coaxing to get out. So journaling is one way that you can do that. Light Language: An Energy Healing Modality for Releasing Blocks But another way that I’ve found is through practice of light language. Sharing light language. And this is something that I speak and I sing and it’s a multi dimensional language. So it’s something that, when I speak it and sing it, it’s not necessarily something that I, I can translate. I get, I get ideas about what, what it is, but it’s not something I translate word for word. How Light Language Works to Shift Your Energy And I would encourage you to, to listen to what I’m going to share with you today, because what I do and when I’m working with my clients, when I’m sharing light language with them, it is to help them to let go of those blocks that we were talking about earlier. Those blocks when you’re not feeling okay. Light language is a powerful way to go in and, and change your energy, change the, your energetic vibe that you have. Because we are energetic beings. We are, we are energy. And so by sharing this, when you, when you hear it, it’ allows you. Those vibrations are felt by your, by your body and by your, your energetic makeup of your soul. And so it can react to that and it can help you with releasing what’s keeping you stuck, let’s say, and helping to free up the opportunity for some clarity to come through. Preparing to Receive the Light Language Transmission Now, I will invite you to pause the podcast right now if you are listening to this, where you are driving the car, because I know we like to multitask sometimes and we, I know I listen to podcasts in the car sometimes. So if you’re driving, put this on pause, go listen to something else and then come back to this later. But don’t forget, don’t forget to come back because it’s, it’s really wonderful if you can be in a place where you can just maybe even listen with headphones on, if you’re not wearing them already, be, you know, in a place where you’re not going to be disturbed and you can just allow what comes through to wash over you because it, it does help you with stress relief too. It’s, it’s a nice way to, way to release stress and so you might feel really relaxed afterwards. Setting an Intention for Healing and Clarity So I invite you to set an intention because this is also what I do when I’m doing it for myself and when I’m doing it for clients as I set an intention that the message that you’re going to receive will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. So I’m trusting that you’re back now and you’re settled in someplace and, and you might even want to just close your eyes and take a deep breath. I like to do that before I start. Take a deep breath in and let it out. Let’s do that again. I think I want to do that, too. Breathing in and breathing out. Yeah. And I’m setting the intention today that what you, what you’re going to hear today is going to be for your soul’s highest good, help to release anything that is keeping you feeling scattered and chaotic and to allow some clarity to come through, if not today, in the next couple of days in divine order and in divine timing. [Light Language Transmission] Closing and Next Steps Oh, goodness. Okay. I hope you receive that with the love that it was intended. And you might want to listen to this every day. You know, you can just, just listen to Light Language part. I don’t necessarily expect you to listen to the whole podcast episode over and over again every day, but certainly listen to the Light Language and I would love to know how you felt afterwards. You know, you can, you can contact me, I’m on LinkedIn. You can reach out to me, connect with me there at Gloria Grace Rand. You can go on my website. There’s a lovely little contact form there, contact link, I think a little box maybe somewhere, I’m not sure. But anyway, you can reach out to me there or reach out to me on YouTube, comment on this video and let me know what your experience was. I would love to know. Recap: Finding Clarity Through Letting Go and Letting God Emerge So I hope today that you gain some clarity on how you can gain some clarity through the chaos. And yeah, I, I, I’m so grateful that the universe inspired me today with a new flavor of letting go and letting God, letting it emerge through you. And I think that’s probably going to do it for me for this time. So I will be back next week, as I say, with some more ideas on how you can make this next chapter of your life the best one yet.

If you’re a woman over 50 feeling tired, anxious, and craving calm, this episode could be the solution you’ve been looking for. In this conversation with Ayurvedic practitioner Jonathan Glass, we’ll explore how the 5,000-year-old system of Ayurveda understands the unique needs of women in midlife, and how simple daily shifts can help you build stress resilience, steady your nervous system, and restore your energy without pushing harder. This interview is for the woman who’s spent decades caring for others, and is finally hearing the inner nudge that it’s time to come to herself. We explore Ayurveda as a whole-life healing system, (not just a “diet” or body-type trend), and why honoring your unique nature matters more now than ever. Jonathan shares the five universal goals every human being is striving for, and how understanding them can help you design the next chapter of your life with clarity and self-compassion. Tune in to discover: How changing hormones naturally redirect your focus from others to yourself, and why that’s not selfish — it’s sacred. Ayurveda’s five goals of life and how understanding these principles can guide your next chapter decisions. How to spot your personal “out of balance” patterns so you can respond earlier and more lovingly. Why supporting your nervous system and glands through diet, herbs, and lifestyle can make the next 20 to 40 years more vibrant. About my guest: Jonathan Glass is a naturopathic doctor and Ayurvedic practitioner who helps people restore health through integrative, nature-based medicine. He’s the co-founder of Healing Essence Center and author of Total Life Cleanse, a 28-day Ayurvedic-inspired program supporting detoxification and renewal. Connect with Jonathan: Website: HealingEssenceCenter.com Instagram: @jonathanglassnd Email: healingessencectr (at) gmail.com Book: The Total Life Cleanse – available on Amazon or Jonathan’s website Resources & links mentioned: Be Here Now by Ram Dass – The book that first introduced Jonathan to meditation as a teenager Back to Eden by Jethro Kloss – Classic naturopathy guide that changed Jonathan’s relationship with food Adaptogens – Herbal supplements that support adrenal health and hormone balance during midlife transitions The five goals of life: Dharma (purpose), Artha (economic security), Kama (pleasure), Moksha (freedom), Prema (love) Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose.

Don’t think for one second that your best years are behind you. They’re unfolding right now. Tune in as we shatter the myth that your most vibrant, purposeful life has an age limit. You’ll walk away with a simple, steady way to rebuild confidence and move forward with clarity. If you’re a woman over 50 who’s been told (or told yourself) that your biggest opportunities have passed, this show is your wake-up call. The reality is that this season of life can be your most authentic, courageous, and fulfilling yet. I’m sharing my own story of asking for a divorce after 30 years of marriage in my early 60s, alongside inspiring examples of women who’ve done TED Talks at 21 and 78, proving that your dreams don’t have an expiration date. Whether you’re yearning to write that novel, change careers, leave an unfulfilling relationship, or finally pursue the creative passion you shelved decades ago, you’ll discover why now is exactly the right time. You’ll walk away with practical steps to get clarity on your “why,” overcome self-sabotage, and take your first baby steps toward designing your life, your way. You’ll discover: Why “starting over” after 50 is often a return to your truest self (not a failure or a setback). What your unfiltered words reveal about unconscious limitations around age, worthiness, and possibility – and how to transform them. A simple confidence-building path to get clear on your why, gather support, and take one baby step. A daily practice (even 15 minutes) that helps you stay consistent, so your next chapter actually gets built. Plus, I’ll share a Light Language transmission to help you release limiting beliefs and step fully into this powerful chapter. Resources & links mentioned: Let’s Talk Fabulous Show — “Unstoppable at Every Stage: Rewriting the Age Narrative” featuring Macy Baxi, Tasha Garcia, Deb Krier, and Sharla Lee Shults Watch the episode here: youtube.com/@letstalkfabulousshow or on e360tv.com Podcast Guest Gloria Coppola – Author, retreat leader, and novelist who started writing fiction in her 60s while traveling the world (featured in the Live. Love. Engage. podcast). Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Ready to make your best years a reality? Book a complimentary clarity session to explore how midlife empowerment coaching and energy healing can support you in starting over and creating your most aligned life yet: EngagewithGloria.com If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Your words help other women discover that their best years are just beginning. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or starting over after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. Remember your best years aren’t behind you. They’re happening right now. The world needs the wisdom, gifts, and courage that only you, at this stage of life, can offer. It starts with you choosing to honor what your soul is calling you toward… today.

When things you once took for granted undergo a radical shift, it’s normal to wonder if you’ll ever feel passionate about life after 50 again. The good news is that you can rediscover your passion and purpose, and this show explains how. Women over 50 can get knocked sideways by major life transitions and/or the feeling that “there must be something more to life.” Today, I share my own raw journey following the death of my sister and my unfulfilling marriage that caused me to lose sight of my business direction – only to discover that the confusion itself was leading me to a new purpose. You’ll hear why it’s OK not to have the answers right now, how to trust the messy middle of transformation, and what actually helps when you’re trying to redesign your life from the ground up. Plus, you’ll receive a light language transmission to support your own journey of rediscovery. You’ll discover: Why major midlife transitions can strip away your old sense of purpose, and why that’s actually the beginning of something deeper, not the end The different ways grief can affect you and why giving yourself permission to feel all of the attending emotions is essential Simple practices and resources that helped me navigate my darkest moments Why “surrender and trust” became the two most powerful themes in my healing and how letting go of needing to know opened the door to clarity I couldn’t have forced How speaking about spirituality and the L.O.V.E. Method (even when it felt scary and off-brand) unlocked my true purpose and made my feel light again The gift of a Light Language transmission designed specifically for women who are in the thick of transition and need support reconnecting with their inner wisdom Remember: It’s okay not to know. The answers will come. You will find your passion again. Don’t give up on you. I’m not giving up on you either. Resources & links mentioned: Daily Word magazine by Unity: https://www.unity.org/en/daily-word/mag Bob Sima’s song: “I Don’t Know (And That’s Alright)” Good Grief Women’s Retreat – June 25-29, 2026 in Black Mountain, NC (Early bird ends Jan. 31): goodgriefretreat.net Explore 1:1 coaching and other ways to work with Gloria Grace: gloriarand.com/offerings Take the Personal Power Archetype Quiz to discover your unique strengths as a midlife entrepreneur: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz Book a private Light Language session to clear energetic blocks and reconnect with your divine nature: gloriarand.com/light-language-healing Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose.

What if the thing you’re “fixing” about yourself isn’t the problem at all… but a quiet fear of not being accepted? Today, I talk about the hidden cost to your self-worth of staying “presentable” and how you can reclaim the freedom to be fully you. Women over 50 have lived long enough to know that cultural pressure to look younger. While decluttering my mom’s old recipe box, I came across evidence of that first hand in the form of a hair color ad from the 1970s. You’ll hear how that ad prompted me to explore how fear and shame get packaged as beauty, belonging, and “nice and easy” solutions. You’ll be invited to let go of the script, open your heart to your inner wisdom, value your uniqueness (gray hair and all), and embrace the truth about yourself that never needed fixing. You’ll also hear a light language transmission intended to support clarity, self-trust, and emotional freedom so you can make decisions from love, not fear, and keep designing your life your way. Listen and discover: Why “beauty standards” often carry a hidden message of shame and how to spot it in everyday choices like hair color or dieting. The real cost of staying acceptable (time, money, energy – and the ways it can shrink your voice and visibility). A midlife reframe that aging isn’t something to hide; it’s something to celebrate, because wisdom is earned. A simple discernment practice for clarity: how to make choices from self-honoring truth (not fear of judgment). Resources & links mentioned: “Going Gray” book by Anne Kreamer Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: If this episode spoke to you, leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose.

What happens when grief arrives uninvited? Not just from death, but from the quiet losses that reshape us after age 50. This conversation with author Laing Rikkers reveals how she transformed the sudden loss of her sister into a creative practice that led to deep healing, renewed purpose, and a choice to embrace joy. If you’re a woman over 50 who spent decades dealing with family, work, caregiving and managing expectations, this episode is for you. Laing and I talk about grief as more than death. It can be divorce, empty nest, health changes, career pivots, and the quiet loss of who you used to be. You’ll hear how simple creative rituals (like morning pages) can help you let go of what you’ve been holding, open your heart to what’s still possible, and reconnect to meaning without forcing “positivity.” Laing also offers a practical resilience framework so you can keep moving through hard seasons with steadiness and grace. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why grief in midlife often looks like identity loss (empty nest, divorce, changing roles), and why that’s real grief, not “being dramatic.” The “talk it, walk it, write it” approach to moving through heavy emotions and reconnecting with your inner wisdom. How creative expression (even if you don’t consider yourself “creative”) can be a powerful healing tool. The “sleep, eat, steep” foundation for building resilience through any transition. Why service can be healing. Not as self-abandonment, but as meaningful contribution that restores perspective and purpose. About Our Guest Laing Rikkers is an award-winning author, entrepreneur, and executive coach with over 30 years of leadership experience, including two decades in private equity. Afer losing her younger sister suddenly in 2019, she channeled her grief into creative writing which became the book, “Morning Leaves: Reflections on Loss, Grief, and Connection.” Now a certified grief support specialist, Laing leads workshops and serves on the boards of Feeding San Diego and the Empowered Endings Foundation, helping caregivers and families navigate end-of-life challenges with compassion and practical support. Connect with Laing Website: laingrikkers.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/laing-rikkers Instagram: @morning_leaves_and_poetry Book: Morning Leaves: Cultivating a Life of Beauty, Meaning and Joy (Second Edition coming March 2026) Resources & Links Mentioned: The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron – the creative recovery classic that introduced morning pages Empowered Endings Foundation – supporting caregivers and providers around end-of-life care The Foundation for Art and Healing – research and programs on creative expression and wellness NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) – mental health support and resources University of Wisconsin Grief Support Specialist Training Design Your Life, Your Way – Next Steps: Learn more about coaching, energy healing, and the L.O.V.E. Method™ at: gloriarand.com/offerings Check out the Good Grief Women’s Retreat happening in June, 2026: goodgriefretreat.net Discover your unique strengths for designing your next chapter: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you: Leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose. Remember: Your mess is your message. You don’t need to have it all figured out to show up.

Ever felt like you’ve been running someone else’s race? If so, this episode is your permission slip to finally design your life in a way that fits who you are now, not who you were a decade ago. Welcome to the first edition of Design Your Life, Your Way – the podcast that’s all about new beginnings after 50! When you tune in, you’ll hear what led me to rebrand Live. Love. Engage. after 6 years and the deeper shift beneath it. If you’re a woman in midlife navigating transitions like an empty nest, career pivot, relationship or identity shift, this episode is your invitation to step into what’s next with intention and self-trust. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why gaining clarity on your brand and message can unlock years of stuck energy How a brand manual can be a game-changer for any business owner How life transitions in midlife like separation, career shifts, or an empty nest can become invitations to finally live on your own terms The power of aligning your work with who you are right now (not who you were five or ten years ago) What light language is, how it works, and how it can support emotional release and soul-level healing Why 2026 being a “1 year” in numerology makes this the perfect time for new beginnings and fresh starts Resources & links mentioned: Tiffany Neuman’s Legacy Brand Workshop: https://yourlegacybrand.com/brand-clarity-workshop-series-grace-rand/ (Save $90 with my affiliate link) Check out New Reality TV: newrealitytv.com Curious about Light Language? Learn more here: https://gloriarand.com/light-language-healing/ Schedule your free 15-Minute introductory Light Language Session: bit.ly/lightlanguage15 Ali Rand’s business management company: LiveInYourGenius.com Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps: Learn more about working with Gloria Grace Rand: https://gloriarand.com/offerings/ Check out the upcoming Good Grief Women’s Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Take the Personal Power Archetype Quiz: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz If this episode spoke to you: Kindly leave us a review. Follow/subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode. Share this with a friend who’s navigating transition, reinvention, or a fresh start after 50. Connect with me on LinkedIn @GloriaGraceRand to continue the conversation about midlife, meaning, and living on purpose.

Many women carry a quiet tension into a new year: “I want to grow… but I don’t want to lose myself in the process.” In this encore conversation, I sit down with author and business coach Melissa LaPlante to explore what it really means to build a purpose-driven business after 50 – one that honors people, values, and the planet AND still creates real profit. Together, we talk about leadership without “boxes,” how to recognize the gifts inside your team (and inside yourself), and why intention-led businesses aren’t just kinder, they’re often stronger. You’ll also hear a grounded, relatable take on intuition – how to tell the difference between inner guidance and fear, and how to move forward even when your mind wants a guarantee. Expect a blend of spiritual perspective and practical energy: equal parts heart and “here’s how.” Transcript Key takeaways: Redefine “purpose-driven” as being intention-led: sustainable, socially conscious, and people-centered. Learn how to hire and lead “boxlessly,” looking beyond titles and degrees to real strengths and lived expertise. Recognize fear for what it is, and practice distinguishing fear from true intuitive guidance. Discover “abundance banking,” a way of leading and serving from what you do have: skills, wisdom, and presence, rather than scarcity. Normalize the rise-and-fall rhythm of business growth: big wins, recalibration, and returning to faith and self-compassion. Why this episode matters now Midlife has a way of refining you. What used to “work” may feel heavier now. All the hustle, proving, and pushing through. And as priorities shift, you may feel that spiritual tension that says, “I’m ready for success that feels true in my body and true in my spirit.” This conversation meets you right there with a reminder that your impact doesn’t require burnout, and your integrity doesn’t have to be the price of growth. If this episode speaks to you, especially that pull to lead with purpose and trust yourself more — listen all the way through, subscribe, and share it with one woman who’s building her next chapter with heart. Your share might be the exact nudge she needs right now. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Melissa LinkedIn & Instagram: @Boxlessbusiness Website: boxlessbusiness.com Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – Purpose-Driven Business After 50: Profit + Impact  An Encore Conversation with Business Coach Melissa LaPlante Introduction: Why Purpose-Driven Business Matters Now Gloria Grace Rand: A new year is upon us, a time when many of us set goals for our life and our business. And that’s why I thought this would be a great time to present an encore episode of my interview with business coach Melissa LaPlante about building purpose driven businesses that make money and make a difference in the world. So stick around for a fascinating conversation. I am Gloria Grace Rand, founder of The L.O.V.E. Method and author of the number one Amazon bestseller, Live. Love. Engage. – How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself. In this podcast, we share practical advice from a spiritual perspective on how to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically so you can create a life and business with more impact, influence, and income. Welcome to Live. Love. Engage. Namaste. For the first time in six years on this podcast, I’m actually taking a break over the holidays. And when I come back in January, Live. Love. Engage. will be known as Design your Life, Your Way – empowering women over fifty to live life on purpose. And that’s why I am actually replaying Melissa La Plante’s episode today. Her message about merging abundance with impact, science with, spirituality and purpose with profit is exactly what many of you have told me you need to hear right now. So whether you’re building a business, contemplating your next chapter, or simply wanting to show up more authentically in the world, this conversation is pure gold. Melissa and I dive deep into how to trust your intuition and business decisions. Why giving from your abundance creates more success than taking, and how that little voice inside of you, your own inner wisdom, is often trying to guide you toward something extraordinary. So grab your favorite beverage, get cozy, and let’s revisit this enlightening episode. And remember. I’ll see you in the New Year with Design Your Life Your Way, where we’ll continue exploring how you can boldly live life on your terms and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically along the way. now let’s get into my conversation with Melissa. Welcome: Meeting Business Coach Melissa LaPlante Melissa LaPlante: Hi. Thank you so much for having me. I’m excited to be here and I’m just going to give you a super fair warning. I’m at in my home office and my dogs are in a conversation apparently, so apologies if you hear that in the background. But yes, I’m excited to be here. Thank you for having me. Gloria Grace Rand: Well, I, I’m glad that you’re here and I’m glad the dogs are here too. You know, they’ll probably add to the, they’ll add to the atmosphere. It’s always good. And I’m a dog lover and a cat lover, but I did close my door. Melissa LaPlante: I have both. Yeah, I love me some animals. Defining Purpose-Driven Business: More Than Just Serving a Need Gloria Grace Rand: Absolutely. So I thought we’d start off because I do want to dive into this, this topic because I think it’s so important. But what, what exactly does a purpose driven business mean to you and how did you kind of discover your own alignment between, you know, making money, which is great, but also having an impact. Melissa LaPlante: You know, purpose driven. To me, and that’s, I love that you started with that question because it’s a, I think it’s a misunderstood term in some degrees. I think that, you know, when you think of purpose driven, you think of, oh, my company has to be doing something for consumers that have a need. It has to be, you know, servicing a need. And that’s not necessarily the case. Purpose driven is more about being intention led, knowing that, you know, you are showing up sustainably, socially conscious, you know, that you have. And sustainability is not just environmental sustainability. It’s are the hours you’re working your employees sustainable is the wage you’re giving them sustainable, is the way they’re being treated sustainable. And so, you know, purpose driven really means just understanding your effectiveness effect in the world and on your consumers and, and you know, and showing up in a positive and giving way versus what can we take? Right. And you know, I, I’ve always been, I’m a serial entrepreneur. I started my first business when I was 13 walking dogs ironically. And so, you know, it’s just always been important to me to flourish in business. But as a person, my moral compass also leads me to be intention led and purpose driven. And I just became really good at that paradigm. Sustainable Business Practices: Beyond Environmental Impact Gloria Grace Rand: Well, I love that and I’m glad that you also clarified the difference between yes, maybe a purpose of being to earn a profit or to serve your customers, but really to have a much more deeper impact and not only, as you say, not only on the environment, but also your employees too. What? I’ve got, like, lots of questions, but one of the first things that popped into my head actually while we were talking about that is what are some of the benefits actually of having your business be that way, you know, have that specific. The Profitability of Purpose: Why Sustainable Businesses Earn More Melissa LaPlante: I love that you asked that question. You asked the best questions, Gloria. I love it. So, so there are so many benefits aside from, you know, all of the positives of the things I just listed. Harvard Business just did a study that businesses that are showing up sustainably are 400% more profitable than their unsustainable counterparts. And I don’t know any CEO out there, myself included, who wouldn’t love a 400% raise. So, you know, and so there’s, you know, also when, you know, I’m known as the boxless business coaching consultant because so many years, you know, I’ve been coaching for almost 15 years in leadership and development in one way or another. And people always tell me, oh my God, you think so far out of the box. And I’m like, I don’t have a box. There’s no box. And so, you know, that’s why I developed boxless business, because it shows up, you know, looking at the different aspects of the business in a way that is cohesive. Right. And I’ll explain that a little bit more when we get into more of that. But, you know, I think the benefits are having dedicated subject matter experts that care, that want to show up because they’re, they’re being valued properly. Right. You know, you have increased profitability. I teach one to one problem solving. So, you know, I’m an autistic and ADHD individual. I, in a corporation, do not expect a corporation to educate every employee in the whole building on autism and make everything as autism friendly as possible. I would prefer that they just came to me and said, melissa, what is your actual struggle in this environment and what can we do to meet that need, period? They don’t need to be dumping millions of dollars into one size fits all initiatives to directly meet the needs of their actual employees. So, you know, there’s a lot of benefit to showing up this way. Coaching Neurodivergent Entrepreneurs: Breaking Out of the Box Gloria Grace Rand: I love that. And yeah, and that was one thing I was going to possibly touch on because I know that you mentioned that you do, I guess, work with, as part of your business is you do like working with people who are, you know, similar to you. And I think we all like to do that. I think especially as coaches, we like to find that audience that we can relate to in particular. Melissa LaPlante: Right. Well, you know, like I said, I’ve been coaching for almost 15 years, but I went into business for myself a year ago, little over a year ago. And at the time, yes, I was working with neurodivergent entrepreneurs. Because nobody knows a neurodivergent entrepreneur like a neurodivergent entrepreneur. Right, Exactly. I realized that what I was doing was trying to help people who don’t fit in the box, which, by the way, no one fits in, but people who don’t fit in the box navigate fulfilling their dreams. When then I realized I’m kind of mowing the yard one blade of grass at a time. So what I’ve decided to do, because I have so much experience in corporate leadership, you know, half my career I was in IT leadership and development for a global outsourcing company. So I definitely know what I’m doing in that wheelhouse. And I realized that I need to be, instead of helping people fit in the box, I need to jump into these corporations and get rid of the box. Gloria Grace Rand: I love that. Yeah, yeah. Because it definitely is so limiting and constricting when you feel like you have to be. You’ve got to operate in a certain way and yet create, you know, processes, I think that. That are going to fit everybody. But we are all unique individuals. Melissa LaPlante: Exactly. The Science Behind Success: Quantum Physics Meets Spirituality Gloria Grace Rand: So what’s going to work for somebody is not going to work for somebody else. And you know, we. I mentioned early in your, when I was talking about your, your bio, that you also like to combine science with spirituality. So talk a little bit about that. Because. Because again, like I said, I, I geek out on quantum physics, but. Me too. But I also have, you know, my, my sort of more spiritual woo woo side, as some would say as well. Melissa LaPlante: Me too. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. Talk to me a little bit about that and how you kind of weave that into business. The Physics of Success: How the Law of Attraction Really Works Melissa LaPlante: Yeah, that’s, that’s the secret sauce to my, my teaching. Right. So I have a three part method in boxless business. And the first part is the physics of success. I have been obsessed with quantum physics for probably 20 years. I did a deep dive and never came up for air. And one day I was sitting down and I was like, how do I always achieve? Because every goal I’ve ever set for myself, ever, no matter how grandiose or large I’ve achieved and, and accept my current goals. Right. Which I will achieve. I’m just still in the process. But I decided to sit down and like really analyze my, my process, my personal process of goal achievement. And then one day I got a hair to compare it to the laws of physics and see if I could make a one to one comparison. And I could on every level. Right. And so I developed so just something to give you kind of a, a teaser of what this talks about. Take for instance, you being someone who is in the woo woo spiritual world as well. I’m sure you’ve heard of the law of attraction. Well, it’s not really a scientific law, but it’s a real thing. So what is the scientific law? It’s electromagnetism. Why? Because our brains produce electricity and our bodies conduct it and our emotions create an actual magnetic field around us that can be measured with tools. MIT discovered that. Pretty cool stuff. And so when your thoughts are in line with your emotions and your actions or lack thereof, that is your electromagnet, that is the frequency that you are vibrating at that is attracting other things of that frequency. And that is neither good nor bad because if your thoughts say I suck and your emotions say I can’t do it and you take no action, that’s your reality, nothing happens. Right. So, and, and, and, and you can’t argue with the laws of physics. I know I tripped and fell the other day. Gravity is totally still working. And so, you know, so the, the physics of it is, is basically teaching leaders how to take actions with physics behind them to know that those actions are going to be successful. Right. The spirituality part of it is what I call is a system that I designed called abundance banking. So abundance banking, every single one of us is an abundance bank account with an abundance of our knowledge, experience, talents, curiosities, the way our brain thinks, everything. Right. And Then every person that you know who’s also a bank account is in your abundance portfolio, right? And, and so in a leadership position, when you really look at your portfolio and see the assets, not just the titles because you know the, the slogan for Voxels business is no boxes, no labels, no. Right. So let’s say you have Ted in accounting and he’s great at accounting and you love him for that. But he also had a, you know, few years in college where he was interested in marketing and he didn’t love the whole picture of it, but he has a super awesome knack for coming up with like ads, right? So in a boxless business you can actually pull Ted in on an amount in on that marketing meeting regardless of his, you know, experience, degrees, etc because his brain does that thing, right? And you can, you can say hey, can you add to this? You know, and it creates a collaborative versus competitive environment, right? People aren’t boxed in by their position. You know, also, you know, validating self taught people. You know, because my father and I both are self taught experts. My father passed away, but he taught himself computer programming and went on to be a senior systems architect for an aeronautic space company by the time he died. Gloria Grace Rand: Wow. Hiring Outside the Box: Why Degrees Don’t Define Expertise Melissa LaPlante: And that was within a 10 or 15 year span, right. I taught myself physics and I have sat across the table from traditionally physics trained people who get what I’m saying, agree with what I’m saying and agree that I know what I’m talking about. But I didn’t go to school for it. So we need to be hiring outside the box. We need, oh, do you know how many people don’t apply for a job because they see they need this degree and that degree and this amount of experience, but they’re actually subject matter experts who could really do the job and love it. Right? So you know, it’s, it’s, it’s really understanding the assets of your abundance portfolio as a company to really maximize what you can do with your team. Right? So and then the final piece of it is, is what my company’s named after, the self awareness method. C, E, L, L F. And that’s because we’re each a cell in the greater organism and we each have that deposit of abundance that we were born with. Something we are just so passionate at and good at. I can never talk enough about what I do because it’s my abundance, right? And so, you know, when you hire people who are, you know, based off their assets as an abundance bank account versus their certifications, their degrees, who they knew, whatever Right. Then you hire people who are so passionately excited for the opportunity. You hire people who are grateful, you hire people who are dedicated and, you know, you can coach them in the gaps that they didn’t get from school. You know, I mean, that’s a leader’s job, is to cultivate and develop their team. Right. So this is what I do. I teach leaders how to be leaders. It’s funny, I, I love the term that I came up with. You know, you’ve heard the term a man’s man. Well, I, I consider myself a leader’s leader. Gloria Grace Rand: I like that. Very good, very good. Building Your Dream Team: How to Hire with an Abundance Mindset Gloria Grace Rand: Yes. So, so how would someone, so let’s say a lot of my audience are women entrepreneurs. And let’s say maybe right now they’re, maybe they have a small team or maybe, or maybe not, but maybe they’re looking to start, you know, adding team members. So what, what do you advise them to do to. How to be able to find people that, you know, because normally, you know, you have, you set up, you know, as you said before, you know, you’ll say, oh yeah, you know, I want someone to be able to fill this position and you have these requirements, but to have it more abundance minded. I love that and putting that into it. So how would you go about, you know, putting out a call for, you know, I want to hire somebody and this is, you know, how do you go about doing that? Melissa LaPlante: Yeah, so I think you just got to have the right facilitators. So what I mean by that is put out the description the same way you would. Right. And add if you prefer a degree, that’s okay, you’re allowed to prefer a degree. But, you know, also have a section where they can actually fill out a questionnaire that is related directly to the job duties, have qualifying questions that they can show up and say, you know, they can kind of prove, hey, I actually know what I’m talking about, despite this degree. And then, you know, I remember years and years ago when I was in college, I was an engineering headhunter and I understand the pain of interviewing well. Not to mention I’ve been in a leadership position in almost every company I’ve been in. So I understand the pain of interviewing and how like, tedious it can be. And I think the best way to weed out your best candidates is really like, give, you know, a format that they can answer specific questions that gives you the confidence they can do the job. Right. And many, like administrative positions do this typing test or, you know, a quiz on different software things, etc. Right. So I think that the best way to not waste your time interviewing a bunch of people who just really wish that they could do the job but aren’t actually subject matter experts is to have, you know, something that is quantitative that they can actually go through and answer and fill out and whatever. And then you can take that and say, okay, wow, this person, they didn’t go to college, they don’t have any experience in this field, but these answers are it. This is what I’m looking for. Right. So I think that would be the best approach to take. Gloria Grace Rand: Very cool. All right, well, I appreciate that and I’m sure everybody else out there as well, and that makes a lot of sense too. Measuring What Matters: Tracking Financial Success and Positive Impact Gloria Grace Rand: So I want to get back to when we were talking about this purpose driven business. What strategies have you found most effective for measuring, let’s say, both financial success but also positive impact on humanity? Melissa LaPlante: That’s actually interesting that you mentioned that because I’m running a case study right now for exactly those things. I’m actually looking for 10 leaders, which by the time this airs, I’m sure I’ll have found them. But I am looking for 10 leaders to participate in a case study where they implement the boxless method into a corporate environment and then we can measure how they’ve grown. But I feel like it’s been very successful in my one to one when I was working with entrepreneurs, when I worked with them, especially in the self awareness section of it, really helping them learn who they are, how they relate to their career, you know, what they want to achieve and things like that and really like zeroing in their focus really helped them make decisions with intention that led to positive results. Right. So as far as the data goes, I am excited as heck about doing this study because, hello, I am a scientist and I love data mining. I know that’s insane, but I do. And so I, you know, I, what I will do is once I get some numbers, I would love to send them to you so that you can kind of, you know, add them at the, under the blurb of the, of the conversation we’re having. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, absolutely. That would be great. I would greatly appreciate that for you. Melissa LaPlante: Yeah, me too. So hopefully I find those 10 leaders soon. Gloria Grace Rand: I’m sure you will. I’m sure. Melissa LaPlante: I know, I’m not worried. Trusting Your Intuition: Making Strategic Business Decisions from the Heart Gloria Grace Rand: Something else I want to ask you about too. And, and this kind of goes along with what we were talking about and you know, when you were talking about spiritual spirituality and I know part of that is also like paying attention to your intuition. So how does that play into, you know, making strategic business decisions? But you know, how? Also, because I think I’ve, I’ve even written an article about this in the past as well. Is, is balancing it though, with, you know, being focused on your numbers and, and, but, you know, so being able to. How do you, how do you, how do you. Yeah, yeah, kind of combine that. Overcoming Fear: Why It’s the Real Root of Business Failure Melissa LaPlante: Absolutely. So I, I have always, always followed my intuition. From the time I was, When I was 17, I moved from Kansas City to Los Angeles by myself. I knew one person, I had no money, no plan, but my intuition said, this is home, this is where you belong. And 25 years later, it was not wrong. Okay. So, you know, I’m not religious, but I am extremely spiritual. And I feel like intuition is sort of the universe’s voicemail or God’s voicemail or whatever you want to call it in your faith, right? But it’s that place that the higher self and the higher universe is telling you this is, this is legit. And what people tend to come across when they listen to their intuition is fear, right? And fear. You know, people say that, you know, the Bible says that the love of money is the root of all evil. I disagree. I believe fear is the root of all evil. Every thing that we’ve ever done, rather, we’re, you know, terrible to somebody because we feel insecure or we, you know, start a war because we’re running out of resources. And this country has them. It’s all fear based. Everything is, is, you know, so when you act out of fear and don’t listen to your intuition, you make terrible decisions. And a lot of times money can be the root of that fear. Like, oh, if I do this change that I, that I really want to do, then it’s really going to hit my numbers, right? And, and the truth is that when you listen to your intuition and you learn to distinguish it from fear, right? And you push through that fear, then, then you’re going to get amazing results regardless, you know, and having a goal and taking actionable steps towards that goal, it’s using those physics of success. If you follow those physics of success and you listen to your intuition and you practice that self awareness and that abundance mindset, you cannot fail. Einstein actually said a quote, match the frequency of the reality you wish to achieve and you cannot help but achieve that reality. It is not philosophy, it is physics. Raising Your Vibration: The Key to Effortless Business Flow Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. And I, I know this is so true because it is, it really makes so much sense. Because when, you know, when you are focused on being in that high Vibration state. Then number one, I find that things are a lot easier to deal with anyway, you know, and, and you can really, you find that you’re more in the flow, but when you’re miserable, then, then it’s, sometimes it’s, it’s harder to even get stuff done. I, I, yeah, so, yeah, well, and. Melissa LaPlante: It goes back to that electromagnet, right? What frequency are you vibrating at? Something that I love to tell my clients is to picture a bowl of room temperature water and a glass of room temperature water. And then you pour the room temperature water in the room temperature water. Does the temperature of the water change? Of course not. So if you are vibrating in this negative frequency, if you are, you know, your electromagnet is aligned in a way that’s not conducive to what you’re wanting, and the actions that you’re taking are not direct with your intention, you know, then that’s, that’s going to be your reality. But if you, you know, flip the script and, you know, you understand these ways to take actions and listen to your intuition and do these things, then it’s impossible to fail. You’re gonna hit bumps along the way, right? There’s the law of inertia. An object in motion stays in motion until an outside force stops it. But then that’s when you go back to your, you know, drawing board and say, okay, what worked? What didn’t work? And this is gravity. Gravity is a, you know, we all know that what goes up must come down. And, but we also don’t realize that breathing in and out is part of gravity. Waves coming in and out is gravity. Your heart beating is gravity. It’s all gravity. And, and something that is important to understand about gravity and business is that when you have a big win, there will be a fall. And that’s okay, it’s normal, right? But it is understanding to surrender to that process and to take that time to step back, reassess, reevaluate what’s working, what’s not working, what options do I have to make changes? Right? This is, this is where you kind of surrender to the gravity and to faith. And faith is huge because if you don’t have faith in what you’re doing, faith in yourself, faith in your team, faith in your company and what they’re doing, that plays a big part in the vibration of your electromagnet. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, absolutely. Impact Without Compromise: Staying True to Your Values in Business Gloria Grace Rand: So I want to again, because I love, I love this whole idea of being, being really purposeful with our business and being able to create a bigger impact in the world. And that’s something that I want to do as well. How, what advice would you give for someone who really does feel called to make this bigger impact, but maybe they’re afraid they might have to compromise somehow. They might have to compromise their values in order to be able to succeed. Because again, you know, we live in this kind of culture that is so focused on, you know, profit and succeeding and also a lot of like, you know, just go, go, go type of mentality. More of the masculine energy, frankly, as opposed to the feminine, which is where you can lean into your intuition. So what would you, what kind of advice would you have for someone who really, who wants to do good, you know, in the world, but maybe they’re still a little, you know, unsure about that? Giving from Abundance: How Small Acts Create Big Impact Melissa LaPlante: Well, that’s the thing is that a lot of people mistake that doing something good in the world means doing something big. And that’s not true every single day. Every choice that I make is with intention to be aligned with who I am as a person, which I know intimately because I developed the self awareness process. And so a great example of this, I was driving down the road one day several months back and I saw a gentleman broken down on the side of the road and my first thought was, well, I’m not going to pull over and help him. He seems like the type of guy that would know stuff about cars and I know limited stuff about cars, but, you know, and, and I don’t really, I don’t really have anything, I don’t have money right now to help him get a tow truck or anything, you know, and, and so I kept driving and then I realized, like, my abundance philosophy is all about what can I give versus what can I get versus and using what you do have in the moment to do that. And it doesn’t have to be money, right? And so I felt really bad and I actually pulled a U turn and drove back and I got out of the car and I said, you know, I don’t know anything about cars and I don’t have the money to help you get a tow truck or anything, but how can I show up for you? What can I do, right? And. And then his wife got out of the car, didn’t realize he had anyone with him. And they were like, oh my God, thank you so much. You know, if you could just give us a ride a mile down the road, like our cousin lives there, he can help us. And I’m like, oh, absolutely. So I gave them a ride, but in the time that I gave the ride. I ended up finding out the wife had no idea that she was neurodivergent. We know our own. We can. We can just tell you, you know, And. And. And she had dreams of being a zoologist and all these things, but she had grown up poor and abused. Hey, ditto, you know, and so I gave her just the inspiration I had to give by telling her, hey, this is where I came from, and this is where I am, and this is how I did it. And it wasn’t the way that you think you have to do things, right? It’s out of the box. It’s boxless. And she was just in tears by the time she left my car. And I realized that that was the abundance I was meant to give in that situation. It wasn’t the ride, it wasn’t the mechanical help. But if I had never stopped, if I had never asked how I can be of service, you know, with what I did have available to me, I would have never had that experience. And, you know, that experience was a big part of, you know, really solidifying abundance banking for me. Really like saying, yeah, this is absolutely. Because this is the way I’ve always been my whole life. But, you know, it’s sometimes hard to quantify how one exists in words and steps and whatnot. So that’s what I’ve spent the last 15 years doing, is developing these processes. And then I spent the last year or so going, okay, now they need words. Gloria Grace Rand: I love it. And. And, you know, you just reminded me of something that happened to me a couple of years ago as well, is that I had. Actually, someone had run into me, had. Luckily it was very slow motion, and so there wasn’t a whole lot of damage to my car. But then when I took the car to the dealer and while they were doing some work, I wound up having a discussion with the receptionist, and she started telling me about all of the stuff that was going on in her life, and she was struggling. And so I kind of did the same thing as you as I wound up offering this woman advice. And. And I. I kind of came away from. There was like, well, if I hadn’t gotten into that accident today, I wouldn’t have gone over to see this person, and I wouldn’t have been able to give her, you know, the support that she needed in the moment, because she really, really needed it. So. Melissa LaPlante: And that’s your abundance. You know, that is what you had to give. And so that’s. So when people realize, you know, take the steps to learn what their abundance Is right. Then they, they can, you know, and to be conscious enough to say, I don’t know how I can help you because I don’t necessarily have the resources I think you need. But, but with what I do have, how can I help? Right. And that’s, you know, abundance banking. It’s giving versus getting. Abundance Banking in Action: A Wine Company’s Creative Solution Melissa LaPlante: So how do we translate this to business? Well, this is an excellent example. I love giving people of a business that’s already doing things boxlessly. There’s a wine company in Northern California called Fetzer and they had a terrible mole problem in their vineyards. Moles were eating up all their grapes and tearing up their vines. And instead of taking traditional measures like companies normally do, pesticides, traps, extermination, whatever, they decided to invest in building really attractive owl habitats so that owls naturally wanted to live there. And then the owls all moved in and were like, look at all the takeout here. Yes. And so they solved the problem. They ate all the excess moles. And one or two moles is not going to hurt an entire vineyard. Right. But they, they solved the problem. And so instead of taking from the environment by poisoning the earth by, you know, also they saved a ton of money because you have to redo those initiatives every few months to, to every year, depending on what it is that you’re doing. So you’re constantly paying for exterminators. Nobody’s paying those owls to live in those awesome houses. That was a one time investment. Right. And so this is a way that a company can give to a problem versus take from a problem to meet its own means while increasing profitability. Because one, they saved their grapes. Gloria Grace Rand: Right. Melissa LaPlante: And two, they saved the money that they would have spent repeatedly on extermination services, all while benefiting the environment. And this is abundance banking in action. Right. Gloria Grace Rand: I love that. Melissa LaPlante: Yeah. Gloria Grace Rand: Oh, so cool. I. This has been amazing and you’ve exceeded my expectations, frankly. Melissa LaPlante: So thank you. Curiosity Corner: Exploring Teleportation and Quantum Physics Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. I love this discussion we have. And I know folks listening have been just getting so much value, but I’m going to, I’m going to, I love to throw a curveball at my. Melissa LaPlante: Oh, I love to get one. Yeah, let’s do it. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. Because I love asking our guests, what are you curious about right now? Melissa LaPlante: Teleportation. So I, like I said, I’ve been a huge physics nerd. And while I was, I tend to, even though I know my stuff, anytime I teach a master class or anytime I’m going to be in front of people, I tend to want to brush up a little just to, you know, make sure I’m on top of my game, make sure nothing changed. Science is obviously always changing. And so I was reading something about thermodynamics that sparked an idea, and I just went down this huge rabbit hole of the way that they should be doing teleportation versus the way they are. The really cool thing is I actually had a conversation yesterday with a guy who was a physics major in college and threw all my ideas at him. And he was like, that’s definitely plausible. That is a valid idea of what to do. Right. And so that was really cool. Also, huge, Huge nerd. You know, you said you were geeking out about spirituality. I’m just a geek in general. I got so excited, I just posted a new newsletter called the Boxless leadership revolution on LinkedIn. And Dan golden, the ninth chief of NASA, actually heart, reacted to the first edition and I almost fell out of my chair. I was like, no way. Um, but yeah, I’m always curious about quantum physics, science. That’s, as an autistic person, that is my special interest. And so I’m constantly engaged in, like, new science and new theories. It’s always driven me a little nuts that I will have this crazy theory that I think, oh, there’s no way that’s, you know, plausible. And then three to seven years later, NASA will come out, new breaking theory. And I’m like, new for you, dude. The Collective Conscious: How We’re All Connected Gloria Grace Rand: Well, that’s it. And that’s because, you know what? We’re all connected, you know? Yeah. It’s that energy. Melissa LaPlante: It’s a collective conscious. Yeah, right. Gloria Grace Rand: Exactly. Yeah. And, oh, there was something else I was going to say about that, but I forgot now. Darn it. Well, that’s okay. Melissa LaPlante: It happens. I can relate. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, well, yeah, because I, I, I love that story. So it was just so good. So, yeah. Oh, I know. Yeah. Because, ah. Oh, well, it’s okay. I know, I know. It was, it was something related to when you were just, just talking about being serious. Melissa LaPlante: I do understand. I have adhd, so I definitely understand. It’s so funny. My friends giggle at me whenever I do that. Whenever I forget something, I’ll say, oh, hi, little ADHD thought. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, I suspect I may be ADHD a little bit as well, but I’ve just never. Melissa LaPlante: It’s honestly a superpower in many ways. It is. It can definitely be challenge. But again, I teach people how to understand their challenges and their strengths enough to use their strengths to overcome their challenges or when to ask for help from your abundance portfolio. Gloria Grace Rand: That’s right. There you go. I Love that. Keys to Success: Gratitude, Faith, and Self-Compassion Gloria Grace Rand: Okay. I’m trying to think. Oh, I know. Yeah. That’s the question I want to ask you next is is there anything else I should have asked you about that I didn’t? Or any other last point you want to leave with our listeners before we close today? Melissa LaPlante: No, I think you asked excellent questions. And the only thing I would leave our listeners with is probably the key to every bit of my success has been three things. Number one, lead with gratitude. Always be grateful for what you do have instead of what you don’t have and keep the mindset of, you know, I, I posted something on my social media, a quote the other day that I came up with based on an interaction with someone, but it said turn the end of I can’t because into a to do list. That makes you the person that can, because. Right. So writing things down, you know, being intentional, you know, always, you know, asking yourself, is this, you know, does this action? Does this choice? Does this, you know, does this align with what I want to do? Right. And then lastly, faith, faith in the universe, faith that, you know, physics can’t fail you, that if you take the action, there will be a reaction, you know, and so, and if your electromagnet is tuned properly, it’s going to be a good reaction, right? It’s going to be the reaction you want. And so, you know, just faith, gratitude and, and dedication, you know, those, those are the three ingredients that really keep you going. And self compassion. I will add that as well. Because it’s okay to make mistakes. Einstein said, if you’ve never made a mistake, it’s because you never tried anything. And think about, you know, I love to use the example of Thomas Edison when, and in two separate areas, I love to use this reference and when people tell me, oh, I can’t do this because I don’t have a degree. I’m sorry, where did Thomas Edison get his electrical engineering degree? And also when people get frustrated with, you know, what they assume to be failure, the only failure is quitting or never starting making mistakes, having setbacks. Those aren’t failures. Those are learning points, those are growth points. Those are ways to, now I know what not to do next time, right? And so, But Thomas Edison, 8,000 times, he failed 7,000, 999 times before the 8,000th attempt worked. So imagine if he’d given up at time 20, 30, 50, 100, we’d be sitting in the dark right now. We wouldn’t be on this phone, nothing would be happening. I mean, Nicholas Tesla might have brought up the lead for sure. Because he definitely coined a lot of the stuff that, that, you know, Edison did, but did it right. And, and so, you know, it’s, it’s, it’s definitely a powerful thing to give yourself compassion and to say, hey, you know, it’s okay that I am where I am, but I, I’m just in constant competition with myself. I wake up every day trying to be better than I, not better than other people, better than I was the day before. Right. My favorite quote in the world, and I’ve probably said this 7 million times. Maya Angelou said, do your best until you know better, then do better. Right. And that’s all there is to it. Gloria Grace Rand: Absolutely. I love it, I love it. I love you. We, we are like minded people, but I am so glad that we connected and I know our audience is going to want to connect with you too. So where’s the best place for people to reach out to you right now? Connect with Melissa LaPlante: Boxless Business Resources Melissa LaPlante: It would be on LinkedIn. Absolutely. And I can message you the, the profile for LinkedIn. And then of course I have BoxlessBusiness.com which should be fully up and running by the time, you know, this comes to air. My former website, you know, focused on what I was doing, you know, before I decided to get behind the lawnmower. So. Gloria Grace Rand: Well, I, and I, I love the whole concept of the boxless business. Anyway, so I, I think you, I think you’re on the right track for, for sure. And, and I did actually sign up for your subs for your newsletter, but I haven’t read the article yet, so now I gotta go check it out because. Melissa LaPlante: Awesome. Gloria Grace Rand: Why that especially why the NASA was excited. The Real Currency of Success: Recognition Over Revenue Melissa LaPlante: So I know. No, that made my year like that was better than making money times a billion. Every time that, you know, I’m recognized for my work or people benefit from what I teach them, like that’s my currency and that’s really what currency we need to be leading with the abundance currency. Right. That’s why I call it abundance banking. So, you know, and I, you know, if we had more time, I’d get into this whole story I have about it. But you know, we don’t and that is. Okay, so, but yes, you know, reach out to me on LinkedIn on Boxless Business dot com. You can also find me on Instagram at Boxless Business. And so. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, all right, excellent. Well, I’ll be sure and have all of that information in the show notes for everyone. So not to worry. So thank you so much for being with us and who knows, maybe we’ll have to have you on again and dive more into the abundance thinking. Melissa LaPlante: So I think I would absolutely enjoy that. I would enjoy that. Gloria, I have enjoyed our time together. Thank you for having me as a guest on your show. Thank you to your listeners for listening. Closing: Live Fully, Love Deeply, Engage Authentically Gloria Grace Rand: Absolutely. And I do. I want to add that as well. So I do want to thank all of you for listening and for watching today. And I really hope you got as much value out of our conversation as I did. For sure. And I encourage you to make sure that you’re subscribed if you’re not already. And. Yeah. And then I always like to end my show with this encouragement as well, is for you to go out today and every day and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

Imagine being able to transform stress into success – even during the busy holiday season! Discover how you can start aging gracefully with self-trust by listening to this encore interview I did with career and leadership coach Jesseca Tighe. If you’ve been pushing, proving, caregiving, or carrying the weight of “it’s all on me,” this episode is a gentle wake-up call. Jesseca and I talk about why stress isn’t just an inconvenience, it can be information. Together, we explore the real warning signs of burnout, the three different types of burnout, and the small “micro-skills” that help your nervous system come back down to earth, especially when life at home and work both feel like full-time jobs. You’ll also hear a tender reminder that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish. It’s sacred. Transcript Key Takeaways: Recognize stress as a signal, not a character flaw and learn how to stop overriding what your body already knows. Identify the type(s) of burnout you’re experiencing so you can choose support that actually fits. Learn how to use simple breath-based “micro-skills” to calm your nervous system in the middle of real life. Release the belief that “more effort” is the answer, especially when your system is already depleted. Remember that rest is not scrolling, it’s restoring… and you’re allowed to choose what truly refuels you. Why This Episode Matters Now Midlife has a way of turning the volume up. Your priorities shift. Your nervous system gets less interested in performance and more devoted to truth. And in a world that still rewards over-functioning, this conversation offers a kinder path: letting go of what’s draining you, opening to support, valuing what your body is telling you, and remembering you were never meant to earn your worth through exhaustion. If this episode speaks to you and you can feel that quiet inner “yes” to doing life differently, subscribe to the podcast and share this episode with a woman you love who’s been carrying too much. And if you want to stay close as the show steps into its new identity in January 2026, make sure you’re connected to Gloria’s community so you don’t miss what’s coming next. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Jesseca Website: soulutionsforhealth.com Social Media: @JessecaTighe Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – Encore Episode: Transform Stress into Success: Aging Gracefully with Self-Trust Introduction: Why We’re Revisiting This Conversation About Stress and Burnout Gloria Grace Rand: The holidays are here, a time for joy and laughter and for many people, stress. That’s why I thought it would be a perfect time to present an Encore episode of my conversation earlier this year with career and leadership coach Jesseca Tighe about stress, burnout, and why taking care of yourself isn’t selfish, it’s sacred. So stick around because I also have some exciting news to share before we dive into the interview. I am Gloria Grace Rand, founder of The L.O.V.E. Method and author of the number one Amazon bestseller, Live, Love, Engage, How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself. In this podcast, we share practical advice from a spiritual perspective on how to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically so you can create a life and business with more impact, influence, and income. Welcome to Live. Love. Engage. Exciting Podcast News: Live. Love. Engage. Becomes Design Your Life, Your Way Gloria Grace Rand: Namaste. The holidays are here and as Jesseca Tighe taught me earlier this year during our conversation, stress isn’t just an annoyance to push through, it’s a gift. It’s your body’s way of saying, hey, I need you to pay attention to me. So that’s why I’m taking a break from recording a full episode this week before my body starts to complain. And it’s also giving me a chance to prepare for January 2026 when this podcast will return with a fresh new identity. Live, Love, Engage is becoming Design Your Life Your Way, a show dedicated to empowering women over 50 to boldly live life on their terms and on purpose. So pour yourself something warm, find a cozy spot, and let’s revisit this conversation about choosing yourself, especially during a season that often asks us to do everything but that. And remember, I’ll see you in the new year with Design Your Life Your Way, where we’ll continue exploring how to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically on your terms. So now let’s jump into my conversation with Jesseca Tighe. Understanding Stress: Why It’s Actually a Gift That Can Help You Heal Gloria Grace Rand: You said that stress is actually a gift that can help us heal. So that may sound counterintuitive to a lot of people. So I’m wondering if you could explain what you mean by that. The Science Behind Stress: Your Body’s Built-In Warning System Jesseca Tighe: Yeah, yeah. So stress is really a low-grade fear response. It’s a low-grade survival response. So when we talk about or when we think about our ancient ancestors, cavemen running from the saber-toothed tiger, and they had this fear response because that told them, hey, this saber-toothed tiger is after you. This is affecting your life. You need to fight or flee or freeze. That’s another one. But you need to do something in order to save your life. Stress is actually a low-grade fear response. So it’s telling your body and it’s telling you that something’s not right. That something’s not right. You can’t live like this. You can’t do this anymore. You’re way too stressed out. But we ignore it. And instead of thinking, okay, something doesn’t feel right. Something is wrong here. I’m really under too much stress. We think of it as something to overcome. We think of it as something to just ignore. And it’s something that’s annoying. And it’s this existential threat out there. But really, stress, it causes a toll on the body, on your health, on your mental health, and we really need to take it seriously. And so that’s what I help people do. Stress as a Wake-Up Call: The Annoying Cousin in Your Basement Gloria Grace Rand: So it’s really sort of, I guess, a wake-up call to start paying attention, it sounds like. Jesseca Tighe: It is. It is. Yeah. It’s the annoying cousin in your basement that comes up every once in a while and knocks on your door going, hey, I’m still here. This isn’t good for us. This isn’t good for you. You have to do something different. And we say, no, whatever. I can get over it. It’s fine. And then years down the road, we end up with stress-related conditions and we end up with mental health conditions. We end up with substance abuse conditions. It wreaks havoc on our body internally, which is completely invisible and we don’t see it. And because it’s not the saber-toothed tiger right there in front of our face, it’s this essential threat out there. It’s really coming up and saying, hey, in 15 to 25 years, you may or may not have a heart-related condition. And we’re like, whatever. I got work to do. And we need to take these things seriously because we have a lot of research now on what stress is, what it does to the body, and why it’s so important that we manage it. And we are still stuck, most of us are still stuck in a work culture that doesn’t provide those resources or even worse, actively tries to destroy our health and well-being. From Healthcare Burnout to Coaching: A Personal Story of Transformation Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. Now, I know that your background is in healthcare. So were you, because it sounded like I’m trying to remember now from reading your bio, you certainly were seeing how other employees were affected by stress, but was that something you were going through as well? And is that kind of what led you to make this transition? Working Yourself Into Illness: When Burnout Becomes a Health Crisis Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. Yeah, it was. So my path, my story is, it’s not a linear path, like most people. So I have a PhD in psychology. I practiced as a mental health therapist for about 10 years, and then got an opportunity to work in administrative positions in healthcare and mostly in senior living, which was great. I really loved it at first, but living through COVID, living through just the industry changing into more of a corporate structure, it really, really affected me. And I got burnt out, you know, when, especially in healthcare, it’s always do more with less. It’s always work harder, faster, longer. There are no holidays. There are no breaks. It’s 24-7, 365. You’re getting calls on vacation. And I just, I was not doing well. I really worked myself into illness where I got COVID and E. coli poisoning at the same time, and I could not get well. It was really terrible. And I just, I knew that I had to make a change and I had to do something. Turning Crisis Into Opportunity: Starting a New Business From the Couch So while I was laid up on the couch for two months, I decided, well, I might as well use this time productively. And so I’d always wanted to work with people again individually. I always knew I was going to go back to that. So I thought, well, why not now? So I decided to hang out a shingle as my dad would say, and start my own business. And here I am, and I’m loving it. And I’m so glad that I made the switch. But while I was working in healthcare, I did have some tips and tricks and techniques that I did with my team to reduce turnover, reduce stress, to build resilience, build a cohesive team so that we all had time back in our day so that we could manage it as best we could in the environment that we had. Healing Modalities That Actually Work: From Meditation to Functional Medicine Gloria Grace Rand: Well, that’s a perfect segue then for perhaps for you to share a little bit, you know, because especially I assume you also maybe used some of that yourself besides taking the two months of rest, which you certainly needed. I’m sure your body and your mind and soul all needed that rest. But what were maybe, maybe what are like one or two that you’ve found have been really helpful for foes? You mean modalities of healing? Yeah. Yeah. Healing Your Body Like It’s Your Job: A Holistic Approach to Recovery Jesseca Tighe: Oh, gosh. Well, I personally, you know, I couldn’t work. I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t get up. It was really bad. So I really, I tried to heal my body like it was my job. Like I would, I did meditation. I did yoga. I got a naturopath. I got a functional medicine doctor. I had a Western doctor. I had, I did sound baths. I did massages. I cashed in all my gift cards that had been piling up, and which was also a sign that I, you know, I never used them because I never had time to use them. I really went into it with a mindset of, all right, I, there’s something really wrong because I just, I could not get well. And it was just day after day of not being able to get any better. And this was the fourth time I had had COVID. And so it’s not like I didn’t have it before. It was just, gosh, worse this time around. I mean, being in the healthcare, I was, you know, you’re exposed. It doesn’t matter if you’re vaccinated to the help, but you know, you still get it. But I, I just, I took it very seriously. I did everything that I could. I took every, I took every supplement, every, anybody told me to take. I, I, I really put my heart and soul into, into healing myself and my body. Signs Your Body Is Finally Healing: From Hair Loss to Healthy Nails And it, you know, after about a month or so, you know, my hair stopped falling out. You know, the, the, my skin wasn’t as dehydrated. Like there were, there were serious functional changes that were starting to happen that, you know, are still continuing really to this day. But, you know, I just noticed the other day, I’m like, oh, the ridges in my nails are gone. Oh, cool. I must be properly hydrated now or whatever it is, whatever caused, I have no idea. But you know, I, that’s what I did. I just, I took it really seriously. I went in whole hog and I, it was the most important thing that I was doing at that time was trying to get better and heal my body. Cause I, I knew no matter, even with this new business that this venture that I went on, if I wasn’t well, there’s no way it was going to work. And I didn’t want to go back. So. Why There’s No One-Size-Fits-All Solution to Healing Gloria Grace Rand: Oh, wow. And, and I think that’s a good lesson sometimes is that you do have to try a variety of things. You know, there is no one cure all thing for everything. Sometimes you have to go through a few different things to, to try and, and, and, and maybe they also accumulate. And I, and I’m sure some of this, you know, helped because of, you know, I know I’m a big proponent of meditation for instance. So I knew that that is a good, great thing to help you with stress levels. But then of course, when your body is debilitated by illness, then you’re going to need other things. So yeah, so it makes sense. You try to variety of things to, to do. Cause that’s sometimes what you got to do. Servant Leadership: How to Reduce Team Stress Without Sacrificing Results You mentioned, I do want to go back to, you mentioned that with your employees though, you were helping them with you know, a couple different strategies to help them with their stress level, especially so you don’t end up like you did when you’re on the couch. Sometimes you can still do while you’re working. So what, what, what did you recommend to them over a couple of things? Putting People First: A Heart-Centered Approach to Management Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. Yeah. Well, when I, when I work with clients on a leadership level as a leadership coach, there’s a whole program that I take them through. But you know, for just for some simple tips and tricks, there were some things that you can do to build cohesion. And I’m a, you know, I, I consider myself a servant leader. Yeah. I didn’t think I was any better than anybody else. I didn’t carry myself that way. I took a very heart centered approach. And I think also because of my psychology background, I really took their mental health and wellbeing was the most important thing to me. It wasn’t, you know, necessarily managing to the numbers on the spreadsheet or, you know, doing what the shareholders wanted. Yeah. Don’t tell them. I mean, of course there was a business and you’ve got to run a business. And I, it’s not that we didn’t do those things. It’s not that we weren’t successful, but I think that you can do those things and still take care of your people and take care of your employees in a way that is effective and that makes sense. And so I, you know, I’m still friends with, you know, people that I supervised, you know, years and years ago. I, you know, people still reach out to me and, you know, just talk about what a great experience they had. And, you know, I, I, I think that that was just the main thing that I did. I just treated them as people. I put them first. I put their mental health first. “I Love You, Get Out”: Protecting Your Team From Toxic Work Culture I, I, it was just very important to me, you know, even though I was the boss and, you know, I, I was, you know, working and going a million miles an hour. I, you know, I should have taken more care of myself, but I was very cognizant of taking care of them and making sure if they had just finished a huge project or had worked at a bunch of days in a row or worked a weekend, like, all right, well, I don’t want to see you until tomorrow. Like, I love you, go home. You see, I love you, get out. I, I really wanted to make sure that they got rest and relaxation. And I really fought against the healthcare culture that says, you know, you’re going to work 16 hours today and then get up and do it again the next day. And then that’s the norm. I didn’t want that to be the norm in our workplace, and it was not. So I think I was successful, at least for them. The Three Types of Burnout: Warning Signs Professionals Often Miss Gloria Grace Rand: That’s good. Now, I know that you, you work with leaders going through tough transitions. So what are the earliest warning signs of burnout that professionals and entrepreneurs maybe miss or ignore? Burnout Is an Official Diagnosis: What the WHO Says About Workplace Stress Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. So burnout, a lot of people don’t realize. So burnout is an actual ICD-11 diagnosis. So the, the WHO in 2019 labeled burnout as an ICD-11 diagnosis. So you can actually get diagnosed with burnout as a workplace phenomenon. Frenetic Burnout: When You’re Giving Too Much and Getting Too Little And there’s three, there’s actually three different kinds. There’s frenetic burnout, which is when you’re channeling way too much energy into your job and those regular rewards and benefits are not enough to compensate you. So if someone’s feeling like they’re, they’re just putting way too much in and it’s, you know, merit increased time or raised time, and they’re like, woohoo, I, I, I’d rather have my weekends off. Or I, you know, I’d rather have this other benefit. Like it’s just not enough to compensate you for the energy that you’re putting in. Worn Out Burnout: When External Pressure Becomes Overwhelming Then there’s worn out burnout, which comes from external pressure from the culture, from the workplace culture, just from our culture as a whole, saying that you, you, you have to be here. I need you to come in on Saturday. I need you to do this. I know you just worked on a really huge project. I’m sorry, you can’t take that vacation. I need you here. It’s those external pressures that people are feeling that lead to that worn out burnout. Under-Challenged Burnout: The Milton From Office Space Syndrome And then the less common one, um, is the, um, it is, uh, unman, unmanaged burnout in terms of people are not, are under challenged. And so they think of like Milton from Office Space. So, you know, someone’s under challenged in their role. They are just kind of going through the motions and they’re not happy and they’re frustrated. So it can be the same amount of frustration. It’s just coming at them in a different way. What Burned Out Professionals Really Want: Energy for Life Outside Work So there’s actually three types. So if people are feeling like they’re putting way too much energy in and, or they’re, you know, a lot of people have both the people that work with me usually have both frenetic burnout and worn out burnout. They have both. And I work with a lot of healthcare folks because that was just the, the, the community that I’m, that I’m from. And I, I go, I get them. I understand. And I, they, they come and they, they just say like, it’s just, it’s not enough. The benefits aren’t enough. The, the, the money isn’t enough. You couldn’t, you know, it doesn’t matter if I, I get another whatever fill in the blank raises. Like it’s, I’m just, I’ve got nothing left at the end of the day. And that’s what they really want to feel is that they can go home. They have energy for their family, their friends, their children, their lives. They have energy for hobbies. That’s really what they’re wanting. And that’s what I help them get back. The Impossible Balance: Working Like You Don’t Have Kids, Parenting Like You Don’t Have a Job Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. And I can, I can relate to that. I remember a time when before I started my business, I was working, I used to work in television and I worked, um, originally was working for public television for the nightly business report. And so we had a show that would go on every day. And then I, I think because I wasn’t feeling challenged enough, I went to work for another program, but now I was doing almost everything that we had a whole bunch of other people doing. And then I was doing two shows a day. And then at one point, my, I had two little ones with me, one in kindergarten, one in preschool. And I think, I think it was my daughter got sick or maybe my son got sick, whatever, but they weren’t able to go to school. So then I wound up bringing both of them with me to the office. Luckily I had my own office, but I mean, it was, it was not fun. Caregiver Stress: Managing Life When You’re Taking Care of Everyone But Yourself And so, which leads me to my question, because I think you addressed it a little bit, because you kind of talked about external things, but what about, you know, you know, people who are dealing with, you know, either childcare issues or sometimes now I’ve got, I’ve got a dear friend who’s got a, um, you know, a husband who is in hospice right now. And so she’s, their furnace broke down. And so, and then they’ve got a storm coming. So the hospice people had come today instead of tomorrow when she thought she was going to do some other stuff. So, I mean, she’s fortunately not working a job right now, but if she was, I can only imagine the even more added stress she’d have on her. So how, how do like things like that, like, you know, external pressures, like at home, how did that, how does that weigh in as well? Stress Is Stress: Why Caregiving Takes the Same Toll as Any Job Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. Yeah. Well, stress is stress. And I, um, I actually work with, um, uh, caregivers too. So people who are providing care for a spouse or an older parent, um, on their stress levels and, um, making sure they’re taking care of themselves because what happens when they get sick, what happens when they get injured, um, and making a plan for those things. So I do help those folks as well. Like your friend, um, and I feel for her. Um, yeah, it’s, it’s difficult. You know, stress is stress, whether it’s coming from, you know, an actual job or because your, you know, care, your, your job is caring for someone and, you know, caring for someone, you know, small or big, it’s a huge job and it takes a lot out of you. It’s this constant hypervigilance, which is that, you know, huge nervous system response. That’s it’s really not good for us to stay at that level all the time. Why Netflix and Wordle Might Not Be the Rest You Actually Need So it’s about figuring out these little moments throughout the day, um, where people can actually rest and recharge. We talk about what rest actually looks like, what actually does recharge your batteries because sitting on your phone, playing wordle and watching Netflix might not be what you need to be doing to actually rest and recharge. There could be some other things that would actually work better for you so that, um, you know, you actually get to, you know, recharge your batteries and actually heal yourself while you’re resting. So there, there are some things there, there’s not a lot of time during the day for those folks that are caring for others. Um, but there are some things that you can do. And I totally get it. I have a young son and, you know, I remember being on calls 24 seven and missing dinners and practices cause I’m on the phone or I’m like, I have, there’s an emergency and I can’t get home and who’s going to pick him up from school. I mean, it was just, you know, it’s, it’s that constant, I think, you know, for, for men and women, you know, there’s that, that saying you have to have a job like you don’t have a child and you have to have a child like you don’t have a job. It’s, it’s so true. And there, but there are some ways that you can, that you can manage it and, and get through it. Micro Skills for Stress Relief: Simple Techniques That Work in Minutes I work with like a, I work with a trauma nurse who she’s like, I can’t even go to the bathroom during my 12 hour shift. Like what, what, what, you know, what can, what are you going to do for me? So we talk about, you know, little micro skills and actually building in those moments throughout your day so that you actually can get some rest, get some recharge and just, you know, bring that nervous system down just a little bit so that your, your body can relax. Gloria Grace Rand: Well, what, what’s an example of what would be a micro skill that you would, that you teach? The Toddler Meltdown Breath: What Kids Teach Us About Calming Down Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. Yeah. So let’s talk about just a simple breathing technique. So if you’ve, if you’ve ever had small children or been around small children, you have seen a weapons grade meltdown. Like you made peanut butter instead of chicken nuggets, you monster. And they’re crying, they’re sniveling, they’re, there’s snot bubbles coming out of their nose. It’s the end of the world. And then all of a sudden you see them go, and that just that, that’s your nervous system taking care of you. That’s your nervous system saying like, dude, take a breath. Just, it’s just PBJ. It’s okay. But they’ll go. And then you’ll notice if you, if you watch these small, small little beings that then they’ll start to actually calm down because they’re, their nervous systems engage and they can actually relax. Like Neo. Neo’s here. He’s helping. So that’s, that’s an opportunity. So like with the, the nurse that I told you about in my example, I’m like, do you have time to like go? And she’s like, well, yeah, I can do that. So we talked about these little tiny little breath work exercises that she can do without her shift, just to calm that nervous system down a little bit so that she can, you know, move on with her day so that it’s just not so heightened all the time. And then things to do before and after shift so that she can actually rest and recharge. The Power of Breath: How to Activate Your Parasympathetic Nervous System Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. And, and it is amazing that the breath is so, you know, something we take for granted, but if you consciously focus on it, I, I could, I can see how that even just doing that kind of a, you know, that just said, okay, yeah. Jesseca Tighe: Breath work’s very important. It’ll kick your nervous, your parasympathetic nervous system in so that it can actually do what it’s meant to do and to decrease your stress level. And it, it will take care of you. We just have to let it. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, absolutely. Why Running 30 Minutes a Day Might Make Your Burnout Worse You know, what is, what would be a commonly held belief perhaps about either stress or, or burnout for that matter that you passionately disagree with? The Problem With Generic Stress Advice: One Size Doesn’t Fit All Jesseca Tighe: That’s a good question. I think what I, I don’t necessarily disagree with some of the conventional advice out there. I think I would just caution people on what they attach to. If you Google, you know, if you’re, if you’re burned out and stressed out, you’re trying to take care of yourself. If you’re Googling how to deal with burnout, you read these articles and the articles kind of say you should exercise at least 30 minutes a day, which is, which is great. Yeah. Get those good endorphins going. We all know that that’s good for us. You know, eat, you know, eat well, lots of leafy greens, you know, there’s this conventional advice that they kind of go through. Adding Stress to an Already Stressed System: A Cautionary Tale And I’ve had clients come and work with me after reading some of this stuff or doing some of this conventional advice. Like I had a client and that, that came in and said, and she’s never been a runner. She’s, you know, kind of had exercise plans here and there, but she’s like, well, I knew I needed to, you know, run for 30, I read this article and I need to run for 30 minutes a day. So I’ve been doing it for two weeks, but I’m so exhausted. And I’m, now I’m a vegan and I’m still not feeling any better. And I’m like, well, yeah, like you’re, you’re already, you’re putting more stress on an already stressed system. So unless those things are beneficial to you and you know that they are, and it’s a practice that you commonly do, and you know how your body’s going to react to that stress, don’t do that. You don’t need to do all those things. It’s, it’s more about making, you know, doing things that are, you know, smaller in terms of self-care, finding out what actually really helps you personally rest and recharge. Cause it’s different for all of us. Baby Steps to Recovery: Why Small Self-Care Actions Beat Big Lifestyle Changes Um, you know, we all can’t, you know, run for 30 minutes a day. I can never do that. If somebody’s chasing me, like I’m the saber tooth tiger is going to get me on, but you know, we, so I, I would say it’s not that I don’t agree with those things. It, those things are important. They are a part of, you know, my program for clients, but it’s in a different way. And I think that they should just be aware that some of that advice doesn’t, isn’t necessarily going to be what’s good for them. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. Yeah. Cause we’re all unique individuals and, and also depending on how your overall health is, if you started like, you know, trying to run and, and I can say this from experience, because I did, I did a marathon. I’ve done a couple. I did my first one when I was in my forties, I was not in very good shape. So I did run walking, but still it took me a fricking long time, like over seven hours to finish this marathon, you know, when it should have been more like, you know, four and a half to five hours or something, if I’d been in decent shape to do it. And, and yeah, I can see it’s just going to cause more stress and, you know, it could even cause a heart attack, frankly, if you’re trying to run a half an hour and you’re not used to doing it. So absolutely. Baby steps. I like how you, you know, micro steps or baby steps, you got, you got to start small and, and do things that are going to be friendly to you, not add more stress. Jesseca Tighe: Absolutely. Reconnecting With Spirituality: Rediscovering Meditation and Journaling Gloria Grace Rand: Oh my goodness. I’m going to change gears just slightly here. Cause I like asking my, my guests this and it’ll be interesting to see, especially in your, in your field. What are you curious about right now? Exploring the Liminal Space: A Return to Spiritual Practices Jesseca Tighe: Oh gosh. What am I curious about? I am, I’m kind of on, so I, I’ve always been a very spiritual person, but I, you know, kind of got out of my practices for a while there. So I’m just kind of rediscovering. I’m reading a lot of my old books. I’m getting more into meditation. I have a pretty active journaling practice and just trying to, you know, connect with that liminal space. So that’s what I’m, I’m doing. I’m trying to reconnect with, you know, that, that spiritual part of myself. I’ve never been super religious, but you know, I am pretty agnostic. I do believe that the universe gives us things. And so I’m just trying to explore those things and those energies. So that’s what I’m doing. Book Recommendations: Care of the Soul and Essential Spirituality Gloria Grace Rand: Well, that sounds good. Any, what, what, what books are you reading? I’m curious, but I’m not going to look out for new, good spiritual books to read. Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. One of my favorites that I’m rereading right now, I first read it in grad school 20 years ago now, but it was it’s called care of the soul by Thomas Moore. And it’s, it’s a very, It goes really deep, but it’s a. It’s a very simple. It’s a quick read. It’s, you know, you can, you know, probably read it over a day or two or on a weekend. And it just, you know, kind of goes through really simple, practical ways to, you know, care about the. The part of us that is eternal and how to recognize those things. And it talks about intuition and things like that. So that’s. That’s a favorite of mine. I also really like. I’m. I’m also kind of rereading. I have, like, a stack of books I’m always kind of getting through. So I’m rereading Essential Spirituality, which is kind of a book of vignettes. So you can kind of pick it up and Put it down. So that’s a, another one? Gosh, I don’t know. I have a, I have a pretty, pretty big library, so I can, but those are the, those are the kind of the two that I’m, I’m going through right now on that front. The Power of Journaling: A Three-Journal Practice for Mental Clarity Gloria Grace Rand: All right, well, one other thing I want to ask you because again, it’s, it’s nice, it’s nice to hear. I’ve been having actually this discussion about self care lately with a bunch of other people. Is what’s your favorite? Like if you had to pick just like one, go to practice for your own sake, which one would that be? Getting Off the Ruminating Carousel: Why Writing Helps Process Thoughts Jesseca Tighe: For me, it’s journaling. So I have, I can get in my head a lot. I don’t know about you, but I can. And journaling really helps me process those thoughts, get out of that, you know, ruminating carousel. Kind of helps me get off of that and just actually get thoughts down on paper. The Three-Journal System: Gratitude, Negativity, and Data Dump So, and I, I have a three journal practice. So I have a positive and gratitude journal, a negative journal where I just like let it rip. And then I have a data dump journal which I usually keep by my bedside so that when I wake up at 2 o’clock in the morning, I’m thinking about something, I can write it down and then I’m able to go back to sleep. Journals Everywhere: Making Self-Care Accessible in Your Daily Life So I do, I have three journals and I have them all over my house because I know myself. If I’m up, you know, in my office and my journal’s downstairs, I’m like, I’m not gonna walk all the way down there. So I actually have journals everywhere and I have like the little pocket journals in my purse so that I can have them with me. And if I’m like waiting, you know, picking up my kid from practice or something like that, I can, you know, journal something really quick. So that, that’s my main go to just. Because it really helps me process my thoughts and it helps me not, you know, ruminate on negativity. Gloria Grace Rand: So I, I, I love that. And I, I have several as well. In fact, I have, I’ve got a gratitude journal that I always do before I go to bed at night. I’ve got, I do a journal in the morning. I also have one on my computer because sometimes I do, you know, because, because if my journal is in the other room, it’s like, well, at least I can get some thoughts out on my, on my computer that way too. So, so it’s, there’s lots of different tools out there that you can use. So it’s it’s good that you found that. The Serious Truth About Stress: Why You Can’t Afford to Ignore the Warning Signs Is there anything else that I should have asked you about that I didn’t or any other last point you’d like to leave with our viewers and listeners today? Three Friends Lost in Two Months: A Devastating Reminder That Stress Kills Jesseca Tighe: I, the, the only thing I can think of is, you know, the, the other thing that happened to me while I was building this business is I lost three really good friends and colleagues in a span of two months from stress related illnesses. And so I say that, to say that this is serious. And I think we all know someone or know of a friend or a family member or a colleague where, you know, you can just see it on their face. You can see, you can see the toll that stress has taken on them and on their body. And you know, it’s not just this thing that’s out there. It is right here in front of our face. You Can’t Function at Breakneck Speed Forever: Taking Action Before It’s Too Late And we can really take, we can really take advantage of the resources and skills that we have. They’re out there. There’s wonderful resources out there. They can also book a session with me. But there’s things that you can do, but it is serious, it is going to take a toll on you. And you know, you can’t, you can’t just function at this breakneck speed for your entire life. Even though our culture tells us that we can. That’s not correct. And we all know it. We know that it’s not normal. And there are some things that you can, that you can do. Even if your external world, your external work environment isn’t going to be supportive of that lifestyle, there’s still things that you can do. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And it requires sometimes reaching out. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Perhaps, you know, contact someone like you said, you know, contact you and you know, or people like that reach out in your community. You can even find, you know, especially I know suicide has been like so rampant over the past few years that, you know, there are people out there that you can, you know, go online, search for it and, and you can call someone and get, get like a number so you don’t have to, to go it alone. How to Connect With Jesseca Tighe: Resources for Career Burnout Recovery Which brings me to, you know, if someone does want to contact you, you know, and maybe share about, I don’t know if you have any other, other resources that, that people can access through you. Where’s the best place for people to do that? Jesseca Tighe: Yeah, yeah. So they can get ahold of me in a lot of different ways. So my website is Soulutions for Health. S O U L utions for Health for Spelled out. And then it’s Jesseca Tighe. And it’s J E S S E C A T I G H E on all the socials. And you can message me, you can get on my website and email me. There’s a, there’s a free guide on freeing yourself from career burnout you can subscribe to on my, on my website. And I do have a blog where I post weekly educational resources, little tips and tricks for people. So you can subscribe to my blog as well. Final Thoughts: Listen to the Taps Before You Get Hit With a Brick Gloria Grace Rand: Excellent. Well, I hope you will all take advantage of that and I will have all that information in the show notes as well so that you can connect with Jesseca and. Yeah. And be able to spare yourself. You know, don’t, don’t wait until you hit burnout. I think is probably also the lesson here. Maybe listen to those signals that, you know, you talked about that stress is knocking on your shoulder and saying hello. Right. Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. Sometimes it taps you on the shoulder and sometimes it throws a brick at the back of your head. So just. Why don’t listen to the taps first? Gloria Grace Rand: Yes, yes, absolutely. Be proactive. Don’t, don’t wait until it’s, you know, you don’t want to end up like, you know, like you were with having to spend, take two months off of work. It’s not good. That’s doesn’t help anybody. Jesseca Tighe: Yeah. 10 out of 10 do not recommend. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah, absolutely. Well, thank you so much for being with us today. I really enjoyed our conversation and I know people got a lot of value out of it, so I appreciate you. Jesseca Tighe: Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it. Gloria Grace Rand: Yeah. And I want to thank all of you for watching or listening, whether you’re watching on YouTube or you’re listening on your favorite podcast podcast platform. And I hope if you’re not subscribed already, that you will. And that way you’ll be able to get notified of our next episode and get some more information how to be able to really improve your life. So that, as I always say at the end, I encourage you to go out and be able to live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

As a new year approaches, it’s not unusual to start pondering what your next chapter will look like – especially, if there’s a quiet longing inside you to stop pushing so hard, and start living in a way that actually feels like you again. In this solo episode, I invite you to imagine meeting the “true you” of December, 2026. This is not about pressuring you into another list of goals, but to reconnect with what your soul truly wants next. Show Notes | Transcript Join me as I share a tender, honest moment about grief, self-judgment, and the kind of coping many of us recognize. Then, you’ll be gently guided towards a new way with aligned intentions rooted in worthiness, support, and trust in Divine timing. You’ll also experience a practical mini-workshop using my L.O.V.E. Method, a simple, heart-centered framework to help you let go, open up to receive, value what makes you uniquely powerful, and embrace the truth of who you are… especially in midlife, when your priorities shift and your spirit starts asking for something more. Key takeaways: Recognize the difference between pressure-driven resolutions and soul-led aligned intentions that restore self-trust. Learn how to vision your next chapter without shrinking into practicality too soon, so your dreams have room to breathe. Discover why “less is more” in midlife. How choosing a few core intentions can create real momentum (without burnout). Create one simple daily/weekly practice that turns your intention into a lived experience – especially around boundaries, energy, and ease. Midlife has a way of clarifying what’s real: what you’re willing to keep doing and what your body and spirit are done tolerating. If this episode speaks to you, listen all the way through, and then share it with a friend who’s navigating her own reinvention after 50. And if you’re feeling that nudge: the one that says “I’m ready for clarity, I’m ready to come home to myself,” consider reaching out to explore a next-step clarity session with me, where you can name what you’re releasing, what you’re receiving, and what you’re building now… with support. Resources: Learn more about the Good Grief Women’s Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – New Year, True You: Visioning Your Next Chapter Introduction: Envisioning Your Future Self Namaste. Imagine meeting the you of December 2026, one year from now. What is she doing? How is she being and what would she. Thank you. So as I mentioned, a year from now is December. Well, because this is December right now. And yeah, it’s. That end of year is rapidly approaching. I mean, as I, I’m recording this, it’s like we’re already past a week into the month and it’s going to be Christmas and New Year’s or whatever holiday you celebrate, like in a blink of an eye, it seems like. And I know that a lot of time people are doing things like setting goals this time of year or they’re doing vision boards about what they want to create next year. Thinking about doing a vision board myself. I have one that I’ve been looking at all year long and thinking I need to update it. So I also wonder if how much of what you’ve been doing, maybe you have been setting goals and things like that, that it’s related around other people, maybe your family, your clients, your community. So if that is the case and you’ve been putting yourself last or nearly last, stick around. Because today we’re not going to be doing resolutions. We’re instead creating a vision for 2026 that’s rooted in your soul, supported by your higher self and designed for the wise, radiant woman you are right now. Welcome to the Podcast: Empowering Women Over 50 But first, if you’re new to the podcast, if you happen to have stumbled upon us, welcome. I’m so glad you’re here. I am Gloria Grace, midlife empowerment guide and self love advocate for women over 50 who want to boldly live life on their terms. And I, yeah, I know all about the setting of goals and not necessarily having them work out because that happens sometimes. You know, I know I’ve certainly done that in the past in my business. And in fact, a couple, you know, a couple years ago I actually had, I bought this whole, it was like four volume set to use throughout the year of planners. They were one for each quarter of the year. And I started with all the good intentions and filled it out for like the first quarter. I think I did good. I think I did the whole first quarter. Second quarter started slipping back and wasn’t doing it so much anymore. And, and then as often happens, those goals didn’t materialize because what you focus on expands and conversely, what you don’t focus on, well, maybe it doesn’t necessarily contract, but it certainly doesn’t expand very well if you’re not paying attention to it. My Personal Weight Loss Journey: Breaking the Yo-Yo Cycle And I know also, and now that’s for, you know, certainly in my business, but also even in my personal life. Now I’ve. If you have been someone who has actually subscribed to the podcast on YouTube and you’ve been watching episodes of me over the last few years and in fact, I’ve been doing this podcast now since. Well, we. This is our December marks the seventh anniversary. And I. I didn’t actually call this season seven because. Well, I’m going to tell you about that a little bit later. Why. But anyway, so you’re just going to have to keep tuning in to listen. But anyway, yeah, I started this in December, this podcast, this version in December 2019. And as I said, if you have happened to. And even if you haven’t been subscribed on YouTube, go back in and go to my YouTube channel at Gloria Grace Rand R A N D and go ahead and look at my transformations over the last six years because you will see my face balloon and then get smaller and then balloon and, you know, and the rest of my body too, and then get smaller again because I have had a terrible habit of putting on £40 or so and then taking them off the next year because I’m realizing that, oh, I can’t fit into my clothes anymore. I don’t like this. I have to wear bigger sizes. I’m sure many of you out there could probably relate to this, right? And, you know, you start it off and. And the last time I did this was summer of 23, I believe. Yeah, I think it was the summer 23. And I actually went to a hypnotist and. And it worked for a while and I was releasing weight. And then over the holidays and Christmas time, I started indulging and put the weight back on. And then so by last, in the fall of 24, I was back up to where. Where I didn’t want to be again, let’s put it that way, a weight I didn’t want to be. And I was miserable because it’s like I was really, I think, beating myself up a little bit about the fact that how many times have I done this, Gloria? And really, I would say it’s even gone back to like 2015, 2015. I got rid of a lot of weight. I was on a different program at the time and did really well. And then in 2016, my sister passed and I gave myself permission to eat my grief. So I did. And so this started this, this yo yo thing where it was like every year I was either putting weight on or taking it off, putting it on and taking it off. Finding What Works: The Post Diabetes Solution Well, thankfully the universe sent me a wonderful LinkedIn connection last year. A lovely gentleman who, you know, we, we connected a few times and he happened to mention in one of the last calls we had, last zoom calls, that he had discovered this book and he had gotten rid of a lot of weight and was feeling so much healthier. And so he suggested it to me and it’s called Post Diabetes. And I got the book and I read it one week at a time, I should say, because it, the, the authors of the book don’t want you to go ahead because it includes, it’s basically a nine week plan to move you out of diabetes to so that you can be post diabetic. Now, I’m not. I have never been thankfully diagnosed as diabetic, but I knew the way I was going I could be really heading towards type 2 diabetes and I didn’t want to do that. So I followed this program and the weight came off and it was pretty easy too. It was not challenging, really challenging at all. And so by this past spring, I’d say by March or April, I had actually released almost 50 pounds and I put a few of those back on. But I can still safely say that from compared to last October, October of 24 to now, which is December 25, I still have £40 off and I have released those pounds. I’m now putting them back on again. And I’ve been a little indulging this last week again. And I decided this morning that no, let’s go back to eating good food. I don’t need to do that anymore. It’s like I still would like to release a few more, but heck, even if I stay somewhere within the this like a 10 pound range, pretty darn good. And it really feels good to know that I’m not going to go back because I’m, I’m not the person I was even a year ago. I’m not. I’ve grown a lot, personally and professionally. I’ve been. I worked with someone this summer on my branding and that’s why I call myself now a midlife empowerment guide. You probably noticed again, if you’ve been subscribed to this podcast for any length of time, that I’ve sort of changed my titles over the years, over the years. But this is the one that’s sticking because this is the one that really feels finally aligned and it feels good. So, all right, hopefully you see a little bit. Well, this is a little bit of my journey. So let’s get into what I want to Talk about today because I want to help you now create a vision for your next year. Resolutions vs. Aligned Intentions: A Mindset Shift for the New Year So I want to first kind of talk a little bit about resolutions versus aligned intentions. Because again, you know, a lot of people this time of year start creating New Year’s resolutions. And it’s often about, you know, things like, oh, you know, I am, I’m going to lose weight, you know, next year I’m going to go on a diet. Starting January 2nd, let’s say, you know, maybe not New Year’s Day, but the day after, you know, or I’m gonna do something different with my business this year. I’m gonna, I’m gonna start writing down my goals all the time. I’m going to do a better job of, of tracking conversions or whatever it is. But all of this, all of these goals or these resolutions, let’s say they kind of, they not kind of cancel, cancel. That’s a phrase my mom used to use, but it applies cancel, cancel. They come from a place of lack of not enoughness. You know, I’m not enough as I am. Whereas aligned intentions start from, I’m worthy, I am loved, I am guided, you know, what wants to unfold through me, what are my intentions, how do I want to be, how do I want to. What do I want to do this coming year? And so come at it from a more empowered place, from a more intentional. Intentional place in that you are already enough. You are just looking to create something even better. Co-Creating Your Vision with Spirit and Higher Self The other thing is to think of your vision for next year as a relationship, not a to do list. So this is something that you get to co create with spirit, your higher self, what have you. And it’s, it’s malleable. Here’s the thing too, is that as you come up with this vision and as you start to live it next year, know that you can always course correct anytime. So if something you decide, maybe I don’t want to do this, you can change it. So don’t feel that whatever you come up with for next year is, has to be locked in stone. You get to decide what you want to do, and you can always do something a little different. It’s okay. Visualization Exercise: Seeing Your Future Self So how do we go about doing this? Well, as I was alluding to at the very beginning, here is to spend some time, devote some time, maybe after this podcast is over or sometime in the next week to use your imagination and really picture what does that future you look like? How does she feel? What is she, what is she doing differently this year? What has she let go of? And Just let your imagination go wild. Don’t. This is not a time to be practical. Not when you’re visioning, when you write stuff down later, sure. But for now, I just want you to just, just. The Mirror Effect: Finding Inspiration in Others This is what’s coming to me. If you know someone that you really admire, think about what it is about them that you admire. Is it their. The way they hold themselves, the way they speak, how organized they are, or just how kind and considerate they are? Whatever it is, because here’s the secret. Whatever you admire in them, you have those qualities because they are a mirror for you. And I know we don’t always see it, but trust me, that is why you respond to that person. This is why you admire them. Because your soul. Oh, I’m getting like, getting God bumps. As my. A good friend of mine says, your soul recognizes that this is what you have. So when you are visualizing, how do you want to be next year? Think of that person and say, yeah, I want to be more like Jane Smith because I love how she does this and I love how she carries herself. That’s cool. And if you don’t know anyone in your immediate circle like that, maybe it’s somebody you admire from afar, you know, maybe even somebody who’s not even around anymore. Louise Hay is popping to mind. I love that she was an amazing woman who, she overcame cancer and she lived until she in her 90s, I think, before she passed, and still vital and working in her business and speaking right up until the end. So that’s somebody that I admire. That’s. That’s somebody I want to be. Be like. So, yeah, just use that in, in your visualization. And then, and again, also honor the season that you’re in. Honoring the Season of Life You’re In And what do I mean by that? Well, I mean that however old you are, and I know some of you might be not 50 years old yet, maybe you’re in your 40s. And so whatever age you’re in, whether you’re in your 50s or 60s, whatever, honor that and know that whatever your intentions are, let. Let them be aligned with the. Whatever season you’re in. And also not even just your, Your, your physical body, but also your, Your status in life. You know, are you in a relationship? Are you not, Are you an empty nester, whatever, but just have it reflect that, let it do that. And then. Setting Intentions: Quality Over Quantity When you’re coming up with your intentions, rather than coming up with a whole laundry list of things, less is more. Pick. Here’s an idea for you, is to think of like the four. What is it? Maybe Four or five core areas of your life. You know, relationships, your. Your business or your career, your family, your fun, maybe something for fun. And just. And then just set an intention, like in, like, you know, four to six areas of your life. That’s. That’s all you really need because any more than that is just going to be overwhelming. So think quality over quantity instead. I think that. I think that’s a better, better way to go. And. Yeah, so. Okay. So. Yeah, so I just wanted. I just wanted to sort of set a container for. For doing that. And what I want to talk about now is how to give. Give you an idea now a little bit more concretely, I guess, to think of as you’re coming up with these intentions and, and coming up with this vision. I’m using my hands a lot here today, I notice. I don’t know why, but I am. For those of you listening, you’re spared that. For those people watching on YouTube, they’re like, why is she moving her hands around so much? I don’t know, but I am. Anyway, one thing that I, I teach and that I wrote about in my book is something I call the Love Method. So I want to invite. The L.O.V.E. Method: A Framework for Intentional Living Actually, you might want to pause the podcast for a second and go get a pen and paper and let’s. Let’s go on a little. Do a little work right now. I’m going to have you. Or again, you can come back and listen to this later. But let’s, let’s do a little. Let’s do a little. Let’s make this an experiential podcast today and do some work. So I want to have you. I’m going to show you how we can apply the Love Method, which, Which for those of you who have not listened or don’t know what that is. I’ll just go over it briefly and then we’ll. We’ll go through each letter separately. But it stands for let go and Let God. Love is an acronym. So Let go and let God. The O is open your heart to receive. The V is value your uniqueness. And the E is embrace your divinity. So have you paused the podcast? Are you back now? Did you get a journal and a pen, something to write with? Okay. All right, so let’s, let’s. Let’s talk about this. So the L let go and let God. L – Let Go and Let God: Surrendering Control How does that apply? Well, you don’t have to carry 2026 alone. You can let go of control once you set your intentions and then just turn it over to God or source, the universe, whatever you you refer to your higher self even, and just invite a partnership. And what you might want to journal about is the answer to this question, what am I still trying to force or fix that I can hand over to God. And so write down one or two things that you could surrender before the new year. So maybe that is overworking. Maybe it’s working weekends instead of just Monday through Friday. Maybe it is people pleasing. You’re not setting enough boundaries for yourself. You are maybe just beating yourself up too much, you know, over something that you didn’t do or. Or that you did do that didn’t turn out well, whatever it is. But consider letting go of some of this stuff. Okay? So we can start the new year fresh. So that’s the L and let go and let God in the love method, I should say. O – Open Your Heart to Receive: Allowing Support and Joy Yeah. So, oh, open your heart to receive. What are we going to do here? Well, you are allowed to receive support. You’re allowed to receive joy and grace and ease in your life and not just be a giver. So again, maybe as you’re thinking about what intentions to set, what do you want 2026 to look like? Think about where in your life right now are you possibly resisting help or resisting compliments, or maybe resisting taking a break and choose one simple receiving practice for January that you could start doing. So maybe it is accepting help without apologizing. How many times have you. And I’ve hear people do this, right? And I’ve seen people go like, oh, you know, and in fact, I’m thinking right now of somebody who she was in my workshop last year and, and she mentioned that she hated asking people for help because she wanted to be able to be independent and do things herself and she really felt guilty about asking for help. And, and she would even apologize for it. So maybe that is something you might. If that is something that resonates with you. You’re like, oh, my ears are burning. She’s talking to me. It’s okay, you’re forgiven. Okay? You’re human, you know, it’s okay. But maybe that’s something you want to work on first thing in the new year. Maybe it is saying, saying yes to support. Maybe someone is just offering to help you and you’re like, oh, no, no, no, it’s okay, I’m fine. I don’t need that. I don’t need your help. How about saying yes just once in a while? Self-Care Rituals: Treating Yourself with Love Maybe it’s treating yourself to something nice, doing some kind of self care ritual, something special. Maybe you treat yourself to a lovely bath. I mean And I mean a bath where you get in, put some essential oil in. I have some lovely lavender oil that I will mix in with my bath and light some candles, shut the door, you know, especially if you’re living with somebody and, and put a do not disturb sign on there and just sit back. Oh gosh. What’s coming to mind? Showing my age here. There was a, there was a commercial that would say calgon, take me away. I don’t even know if they still sell that. But it was like Kelgon bath beads or something or other. But yeah, do that. You know, give yourself that every once in a while and you know, because we all, you know, we’ll just, you know, take a shower and get off to work. But no, once in a while just do that. Give yourself that gift of a relaxing bubble bath or, or just not even bubbles maybe again, just like some lovely essential oils that you can breathe in and just ah, make it nice and relaxing for yourself. V – Value Your Uniqueness: Your Age and Experience Are Superpowers Okay. V. The V in love is value your uniqueness. So remember that your age and your experience are not obstacles, they are your superpowers. So journal about perhaps what have you lived through either this past year or even going back a while that gives you a perspective that the world needs in 2026 that you could start educating your clients about. Maybe it’s something that then will inform your social media posts, for instance. And so think about that. And I know for me one thing that I’ve doing right now is I’m actually doing a lot of posts about grief right now because this is something, well, I mean we all live through, through grief. But I have especially this time of year it brings up because this is when my sister passed shortly after Christmas in 2016. And so I’ve been talking about that also as a way to promote my good grief retreat that is going to be happening in, in June of 2026. So in fact, if you want to, you want to know more, I’ll put the. I’ve got the link up. You can go to good grief retreat.net and learn more. So just enough of that. I’m not even gonna, not even gonna tell you more about that right now. But anyway, yeah, yeah, just think of, you know, what is it that you’ve lived through that you, that you can share with others and then identify one way that you can show up more visibly as yourself, whether in your business, in your relationships or creatively possibly. And that could be part of what your vision is for next year. E – Embrace Your Divinity: You Are Not Behind Then finally, the E in love is embrace your divinity so just remember, no matter what, you are not behind. You are a divine expression. Everything is happening right on time, right in divine order, in divine timing. So here’s a question to ask yourself. If I really believed I was a radiant expression of the divine, what would I stop apologizing for in the new year? So think about that for a little bit. What would I stop apologizing for? And then choose a daily or weekly practice that you can do to anchor your vision for the next year. So maybe it is a meditation, maybe it is going for a walk. But think about something that you could do. So let me give you a few examples now about what what an aligned intention might look like as you’re thinking about your setting, setting your intentions as opposed to goals. So we’re going to do aligned intentions for next year. Examples of Aligned Intentions for 2026 Setting Boundaries and Saying No Without Guilt Okay, so let’s say it’s around boundaries and saying no. So you could say in 2026, my intention is to honor my energy by saying no without feeling guilty. So what does that look like in practice? Well, maybe it’s declining a volunteer role that drains you, even if you’re really good at it. Maybe it is setting some quiet time for yourself, either every day or maybe, maybe a whole morning in fact that you do maybe once a week or definitely I refer to what I call my non negotiables. So maybe setting yourself up something, something that you do that is you’re going to do that no matter what. And maybe it’s also no longer being that default caretaker or caregiver, I should say, for every family crisis. Maybe it’s let somebody else handle the load once in a while. Trusting Your Own Timing and Unique Path Valuing your uniqueness. We could talk. How did what does that look like in practice? Well, it could be in 2026. I am setting the intention that I’m going to trust my own timing and my path. So maybe what does that look like in practice? It could be launching a small intimate offering instead of forcing a huge program because everyone else is doing that. Imposter syndrome, you know, or you know, don’t. Don’t feel like you have to be like everybody else. Maybe it could be sharing your story on a podcast or in or in writing or social media posts, but really making sure that it’s your voice. You’re not again, you’re not just following what everybody else is doing. And maybe it’s celebrating someone you admire instead of comparing yourself to her and feeling like you’re coming out second best. So that’s something to consider. And maybe it’s about listening to your Body and your intuition. So you could set an intention that says in 2026, my body and intuition have a seat at the table. Or I’m, I am in 2026, I am intending to listen, to listen and follow my inner guidance more often because I’m going to. Because I’m going to bet you probably already do listen to it somewhat. But I’m going to be more consistent. There’s an idea. I’m going to be more consistent about following my intuition. So what does that look like? Listening to Your Body and Following Your Intuition Well, it could be checking with your body before saying yes, doing a little, little check in and say, hmm, okay, does my stomach, is my stomach tied in knots or does it feel nice and calm and relaxed? It’s relaxed. Okay. Then I can say yes. Maybe it’s scheduling work around your natural energy cycles rather than trying to push through fatigue. So if you are, who is. Maybe you’re a morning person, then it’s doing things that you really have to get done or that you’re really, you know, maybe that’s your creative time. Do scheduling that for the morning and then leaving the afternoon for other things that don’t take so much brain power. Let’s say that’s an idea. So yeah, I hope, I hope that helps. I hope you, you’re getting your, your creative juices are starting to flow about how you can create a vision for yourself that feels good. You know, that’s, that’s, that’s doable. That is not something that’s overwhelming where you’re tempted to just give up on it after a month or even a quarter, but something that you could really lean into and, and embrace throughout the whole year. So one thing I want to give to you as my gift to you for the new year and to help you with your intentions is to share a light language message with you. And my intention for this is to. That it will help you to, or to release whatever doesn’t serve you anymore. So you really can step into 2026 with clarity and confidence. Now, if you don’t know what light language is, I’ll just give you the short version. It’s basically a multi dimensional communication that I share. I speak it, I sing it, sometimes one or the other, sometimes both, and use my hands with it sometimes as well. Light Language Healing: A Gift for Your New Year Journey And it is something that it’s, it’s energy and it’s a, it’s a language of love that speaks to your soul. And it’s not necessarily something that you, your brain, your, your logical brain is going to necessarily be able to translate. It’s possible you might, but it’s something that I invite you to just listen to with an open heart. And I would set an intention and, and say I set the intention that what I’m going to hear is going to allow me to release what no longer serves me so I can step into 2026 and be my fully divine, beautiful, powerful self. And I’m going to ask you if you are listening to this podcast where you are when you’re driving, to invite you to pause it and come back to this later so that you can listen to this message, preferably with headphones on, would be really great. But just to be able to listen to it somewhere where you’re in the quiet and you can just allow what comes through to wash over you. Okay. So I’m going to trust that you’ve done that and we’re ready to the to do that. So as I said, just sit back, relax. You can close your eyes if you like, and maybe just take a deep breath and get grounded. And, yeah, set the intention that you’re going to receive whatever you need to receive today and that it is going to be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. Sam Kariyana. Okay, we are complete with that. I hope you did receive it with the love that it was intended. And if someone came to mind as you’ve been listening today to this episode, I hope you’ll consider sending it to her with a little note. You know, let’s create our vision 2026 together. And if you feel called to walk this journey in community, you’re always welcome in my world, where women over 50 are rewriting what’s possible with love, courage, and a whole lot of grace. What’s Coming Next: Podcast Updates and New Episodes Now, as I mentioned at the top of the episode, the holidays are coming up and so I’m going to be taking a little bit of break. You’re still going to get an episode, but what I am going to do is we’re going to be doing some encores here for the, for the next two weeks. I’m going to be sharing with you next week an encore of Jessica Tige’s interview, which is perfect for this time of year because it was all about stress, burnout and self care. And this was, this is one of our most popular episodes of the year. So I definitely want to, in case you came to the podcast late, this will give you an opportunity to hear it. And another popular one that we had also was Melissa LaPlante, and I’m going to run that one the week after. And she, she was a fascinating woman to talk with and it was all about. Our discussion was all about building purpose driven businesses that not only make money, but that also create a positive difference in the world. So look forward to that. And then finally next year the podcast is getting a new name and a new attitude. Exciting News: Design Your Life Your Way Podcast Rebrand So make sure that you are subscribed so you can be here for the unveiling of design your life your way. And yeah, we’re gonna have it’s, it’s gonna be a wonderful thing and I’m looking forward to it. I’ve already recorded one interview for, for the new podcast and it was really great and I look forward to sharing that with you soon. But until then, I hope you have a wonderful, blessed holiday season. A wonderfully, wonderfully. Yeah, a wonderfully happy new year. And even though I am going to be talking with you again next week because I am going to be enter in introducing these episodes. But just in case, in case you decide to enjoy the holidays and not listen to any episodes, it’s okay. You, that’s your prerogative, you know, enjoy. So until then, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

December is supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year,” as the old song goes… but what happens when your heart just isn’t in the holiday spirit? In this solo episode, I invite you into an honest conversation about grief, loss, and the pressure to feel merry when your soul feels heavy. I share my own personal stories of navigating Christmas without family, discovering that grief doesn’t follow a timeline, and it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong either. We explore the many faces of grief: death, divorce, empty nests, lost dreams, changing identies, and the quiet ache of what might have been. Show Notes | Transcript In this episode, you’ll get practical, tender advice on handling gatherings, managing the pressure of “holiday happiness,” and giving yourself grace. You’re reminded that it’s okay to grieve, to feel joy and sorrow together, and to do the holidays in whatever way feels right this year. Key insights include: Understand why the holidays can intensify grief, from traditionals and family gatherings to cultural pressure to “be happy” Discover the power of self-compassion, boundaries, and saying “no” as acts of self-love during the holidays Remember that you can feel grief and joy at the same time—laughing, smiling, or enjoying a moment doesn’t mean you’ve “moved on” or betrayed anyone Hear how community, retreats, counseling, and support groups can offer steady ground when the waves of grief feel too big to handle alone As you finish this episode, take one slow breath, place a hand on your heart, and ask yourself: What is one small, loving thing I can offer myself today as I walk with my grief? Resources: If this episode speaks to your experience of grief – whether from death, divorce, transition, or lost dreams – you’re invited to take one small step of support: Download my free PDF “How to Respond When You’re Grieving” guide: https://gloriarand.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/How-to-Respond-When-Youre-Grieving.pdf Learn more about our upcoming Good Grief Retreat: goodgriefretreat.net Take what resonates and leave the rest. No pressure. I’m just offering an open door if your soul is nudging you toward more support. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Grief, Holidays & Healing After 50: You’re Not Broken Welcome to Live, Love, Engage Namaste. The holiday season is upon us. Joy to the world and all that, right? Well, not necessarily. The sad truth, I guess, is that it’s also a time when grief can rear its ugly head. And that’s what I want to talk about today. So sit down, if you’re not already, pour yourself a cup of tea, maybe a glass of wine, or a glass of water, because we’re going to have a heart-to-heart talk about this subject, because it is one that’s near and dear to my heart. So first, in case this is your first time here, or you happen to have stumbled across the Live, Love, Engage podcast, welcome. I am Gloria Grace. I’m a confidence catalyst and self-love advocate who empowers women over 50, through my love method and energy healing, to boldly live life on their terms. Why the Holiday Season Can Amplify Grief And as I said, you know, this year, this time of year, it’s, you know, it’s supposed to be joyful, you know, and everybody’s supposed to be happy and gay. Okay, not that, nevermind, you know what I mean. I’m showing my age when that word meant joy. And you know what? I think for some people, it still does. But anyway, if you’ve experienced a loss in the past year, maybe even the past five years, whether it’s death of a friend or a loved one, or even a beloved pet, it can be tough to feel merry and bright. And I know firsthand what that’s like. My Personal Story: Losing My Sister Two Days After Christmas It’s nine years ago, but I still remember it like it was yesterday. My sister, older sister Michaela passed two days after Christmas. And yeah, and I tell you, Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, I like, I could feel the end was near. And so, yeah, it was not easy. And it was not easy in the several years after that, you know, when Christmas would come up, and this time of year. And even now, still, I mean, even now, it was like little tears are coming up as I remember. Gosh, yeah, it’s amazing. You know, our brains and our emotions are really powerful things and how they hold on to memories. Even, you know, things, and in fact, I even, you know, I could even go back farther and remembering where I was and when I heard about my older brother when he passed. How Holiday Memories Can Trigger Grief Unexpectedly So, and then, you know, when you come up with the holidays, it’s like, and especially if you do happen to lose someone at this time of year, it’s like every year, you know, even when you’ve gotten past, you know, that initial really tough stage of grief, and you’re into the acceptance, it can still trigger things. In fact, I remember actually, last year, now that I think about it, last year at this time, I was driving somewhere, and I don’t know, something happened. I just started tearing up, but I let the tears flow. And, you know, and then it passed, and I was okay again. But it was just that, those memories. But it’s not even, you might not even be, that might not be what you’re grieving. Grief Goes Beyond Death: The Many Types of Loss It might not be actually death of a person, specific person. It could be grieving your identity. Maybe this is your first year as an empty nester, and maybe your kids even, maybe they’re away at college, and they’re not able to come home for the holidays. Or maybe, like my daughter who lives in Europe, so thankfully she was home a couple months ago, but she won’t be home for the holidays. I haven’t spent Christmas with her for five years, and I’ve had to deal with that. Sometimes it might be that you’re grieving, maybe the business you poured your heart into didn’t make it. Or, you know, or some other dream that you had has died. Maybe a friendship ended this year, that one that you, maybe a long-held friendship, and for whatever reason, you know, it’s over. Could be a marriage ending as well. So all of these things, all of these things can cause grief. And then the volume, the volume, I’m thinking ahead, it got ahead of me. The holidays can pump up the volume, as it were, on it. You’re Doing Better Than You Think So, you know, loss and loneliness and longing for what was or could have been. So if any of you listening to this or watching on YouTube can relate to this, do what I did just then. Take a breath. Because here’s the thing. You know what? You’re doing better than you think. And you know how I know that? You’re here. You’re listening to me talk on this podcast right now. So that shows that, yeah, you’re hanging in there. You’re even looking for support. And we’re going to talk more about that in a little bit. So pat yourself on the back right now. You know, go ahead. Say, yes, I’m here. I’m surviving. And I, this too shall pass, let me tell you. Why Grief Feels So Much Harder During the Holidays But so why does this time of year feel so much harder when you’re grieving? Well, you know, there’s the songs. Actually, I was just at a concert last night. And I don’t think they did this song. But you know, it’s the most wonderful time of the year. No, what is it? It’s the most wonderful time of the year. There we go. I knew the song would come back in my head. Well, sure. Yeah, for lots of people. The Pressure of Holiday Cheer When You’re Struggling But hearing all those songs about, you know, joy, like I said, joy to the world. And you know, all of these happy, wonderful songs. It can, you can start feeling some pressure from all that. And it can be quite exhausting. So guess what? You don’t have to fake happiness. Because the people who love you are going to be able to handle your real feelings. Holiday Traditions and Rituals Can Bring Up Painful Memories Now, the holidays are also, it’s all about, maybe not all about, but it’s a lot about rituals and traditions, you know, the, maybe it’s that holiday meal that you serve, or it’s a religious service that you attend, or, you know, it’s, you know, and no matter what religion you are, there’s, there’s a lot of holidays that come around this time of year, you know, not just Christmas, I’m, that’s when I celebrate, but there’s Hanukkah, there’s, I know Kwanzaa, there’s, there’s, there’s lots of them. So with all of those, there are traditions, like I know for Hanukkah, there’s what the menorah, you like the menorah. And, and let’s say if it is someone that you spent time with, you know, whether it was a loved one, or whether it’s your spouse, or whatever, and they’re not, you’re not going to be spending the holiday with that person this year. You know, it’s going to bring up memories, like, like, like, for me, when my sister was going through cancer, and I was out there, before Christmas, I was with her while she’s going through treatments. She wanted to bake Christmas cookies. And that’s something we always did in our family, is we every Christmas, my mom would go crazy sometimes, when I was really little, baking all these different, different kinds of cookies. The Pecan Crisps Story: Cherishing Memories Through Grief But my sister had a particular favorite, which is also my favorite. And they were these lovely, basically a sugar cookie with pecans sprinkled on top. So good. Just thinking about it now, I actually, actually made them for my daughter when she was here. So she would kind of kind of celebrated the holidays a little early with her. But anyway, so, so she wanted the cookies. I was like, okay, I’ll bake, I’ll bake these Christmas cookies for my sister. And so I’m, you, you make the dough, then you roll them up into little balls, and then you flatten them with it with a glass. And then you put the pecans on them. So I’m going out, you know, I put all these things on the cookie sheet, and I’m flattening them. And she’s looking at them going, uh, you’re not doing it right, Glor. I’m like, what are you talking about? What do you mean? This is the way I always make them. What’s your problem? She’s like, no, you need to flatten them more. So they come out crispier. The name of the cookie is pecan crisps. So now that I think about it, makes sense. They’re not pecan chewies. So I was like, okay, I flattened them some more. And then I put them in the oven. And when they came out, yeah, they were better. Big sister was right. So that’s a memory now that I that I cherish. And and it’s a good memory that I have of the holidays, even though she was going through cancer, going through chemo treatments at the time. But you know, it was a way of us connecting. And, and I think that’s important is to, is to hold on to those memories, you grieve them. But, but know that they’re always in your heart and they’re and they’re gonna be, they’re gonna live there. And eventually, like me, you you’ll be able to look back at that and maybe feel gratitude, maybe laugh at it, if it was something funny. Understanding That Grief Has No Timeline It just takes a while. Give yourself grace. And, and don’t worry about how long it takes. Because grief doesn’t abide by any type of timelines. And everyone grieves differently. Everyone has a different grief lasts longer in different people and in different situations. Each Loss Is Different: How I Grieved My Family Members I mean, again, I’m thinking back, you know, I’ve lost pretty much all of the, I’ve lost all of the members of my immediate family that I grew up with. My parents, my parents are gone and my siblings are gone. And I know that I grieve differently for each person. Because I also had different relationships with each person. And also, I think to my sister is the only person where I was actually with her. When she transitioned the other, my other family members, I wasn’t there. And so I think that makes a difference as well. Anyway, where was I? Where was I going? Okay, so another reason why this time of year can really heighten those feelings of grief is because there’s sort of this sense of gatherings, you know, and it can feel sometimes like forced, like you need to go to this holiday party, or you need to go to, you know, this person’s home for the holiday meal. And when inside, you’re like, I don’t want to. Permission to Skip Holiday Gatherings I just want to withdraw. I want to go curl up in a ball somewhere. I do not want to be around people. And, and that’s okay. And, and, and also you might be even, you want to avoid people like, you know, really focusing on it, maybe asking questions and, you know, and things like that, that you don’t want to deal with. So you don’t have to manage their discomfort, because they don’t know what to say, for one thing. And you don’t have to feel obligated to attend these gatherings if you don’t want. And I will share another story from my life that sometimes the flip side might be true, is that you may want to go somewhere. So the year after my sister passed, and it’s December, or maybe it might be even better, even around Thanksgiving, and I’m just, you know, starting to think about Christmas. Why I Spent Christmas in Texas After My Sister’s Death And at the time, my, yeah, I think my, I think both kids were planning on coming home for Christmas. They were, I think my son was still in college. I think my daughter might have been. Yeah, I think, yeah, I think they both might have still been in college yet. I think my daughter is getting ready to graduate, possibly. No, she’d already graduated. Oh, never mind. Anyway. Sorry, that’s not the point. Point is, we were going to be home, you know, it was probably just going to be this quiet Christmas with just my, you know, my kids and my husband and our pets. But the thought of that, and then usually at Christmas, we would invite my husband’s cousins over. And, you know, and so I would be cooking up the holiday meal. And the thought of doing that was just like, no, I’m like, I can’t do this. I can’t do it this year. I can’t. I just, just can’t. And I knew that my sister-in-law lives out in Texas. And she has three sons, my nephews. And she has a big family because her husband has a big family. And so they have, they always have like big, big gatherings over Christmas. And so we’ve never spent Christmas with them out in Texas. They used to come to Florida when the boys were little, but we haven’t ever gone out to spend Christmas with them. And I don’t know if I came up with the idea or maybe my husband did or the kids did, but whatever. It was like, let’s go out to Texas. Let’s spend Christmas with them. And it was really good because I got to distract myself around all of these people. Because again, you know, she’s, she’s got three kids of her own. They had, a couple of them had girlfriends that were coming. My, my brother-in-law, then his family was there. I mean, on Christmas day, I don’t know, there was probably 25 people in the house at one point, I think, but it was great because I could just kind of watch what was going on. You know, I could just kind of take it all in, you know, have like conversations here and there, but I didn’t have to focus on my grief. I could just be that observer and just be, be in the moment and not have to really deal with my grief. And that’s how I handled it. There’s No Right Way to Grieve During the Holidays So be open to all possibilities is what I’m saying. You know, that sometimes being alone is what you need. And sometimes being with a bunch of people can be a good distraction. And it’s, there’s no right way. That’s my point. There is no right way to grieve, especially during the holidays. Avoiding the Comparison Trap on Social Media You know, a couple other things can come up. You know, one thing is, you know, and this, this comes up a lot for all types of things is the comparison trap that you might fall in. You know, everybody’s posting wonderful pictures on social media about these wonderful gatherings that they’re going to and all these fun things. But you don’t know the full story behind that picture because maybe they’re going through their own grief journey, and maybe they cried in the car before they went into the party. You know, just know that you’re not alone. Okay. Even when it might feel like you are. And, and I mentioned, you know, this before, you know, about this grief doesn’t have a timeline, but there can also be this pressure of time because it’s the end of the year, you know, and New Year is coming. And, you know, people talk about making New Year’s resolutions and all this, all this stuff. Grief Comes in Waves: A Book That Helped Me Heal But, but again, you don’t have to buy into that. You, you can just grieve on your own timeline. And, and I will put in a plug here for, oh, I should have should have grabbed the book to show maybe I’ll put it in the video when I’m editing. But it’s called Grieving Mindfully. And it’s just a little tiny little paperback book. But one of the things the author talks about in there is that grief comes in waves. And, you know, not only this time of year, but, you know, birthdays or anniversaries can bring up those waves of grief. And sometimes they’re going to be big waves. And sometimes they’ll just be little ones. You know, like, like I mentioned earlier, you know, last year, when I just had the had the tears come through for a little bit, and then it was okay. So yeah, and check it out. And just as an aside, how I how I found this book is one of the things I love that, that, you know, God, universe, source, it’s always looking out for us. Signs from My Sister: Finding “Grieving Mindfully” in My Bookcase You’re never alone. Because a couple months after my sister passed, I was going through my bookcase and and happened to see this book. I didn’t buy this book, I realized that this was a book that came from my sister’s house. She had bought that book. And so I really I just took that as a sign of like, thank you, Michaela. She’s still helping me helping me from the great beyond. And, you know, she knew that I was needed some support with with with grieving. So how, how can you navigate this, you know, now we’ve learned already, you know, this, these are why this comes up. But now we got to see how we can get through it. Practical Ways to Navigate Grief During the Holidays And I’ve kind of talked a little bit about it. But as I said, at the beginning, you have permission to do things differently. So maybe that is saying no, no to parties, no to hosting. You can start some new traditions, maybe or, you know, and skip the old ones entirely. You can leave early from someplace, you can take a break, you can change your mind at the last minute. One of my first clients taught me this, you know, no is a complete sentence. Setting Boundaries Is Self-Love, Not Selfishness And it’s okay to set boundaries, because they’re not selfish. Boundaries are an expression of self love. And I also know sometimes though, when you are saying no, sometimes you can start feeling guilty about that. Because you don’t want to disappoint people, I get it. But they’ll get over it. So I encourage you to practice some self compassion. And if you happen to do feel guilty, then practice a little self forgiveness. It’s okay. You will get through this. It seems really hard in the middle of it. I tell you the that that first year, I really did feel alone. But, you know, and it was tough, but, but I got through it. And I’m, you know, time, what’s the cliche, time heals all wounds? Well, it, you know, they might not always get they may not get completely healed. But they’ll heal enough that you can move forward. And I think that’s the important thing. Grief and Joy Can Exist Together You can also miss someone and still laugh at a joke, or a funny movie. You can feel sad and grateful. At the same time, you can grieve what was and be curious about what’s coming next. Grief and joy can occupy the same space. So you’re not betraying anyone by having a good moment. You’re not over it, just because you smiled either. It’s called being human to have these conflicting emotions at the same time. You know, it’s okay. And also feel free to talk about them if you can. Say Their Name: Don’t Hide Your Grief You know, it may be too hard, but if you can, you know, if you lost someone, say their name, tell stories. And, you know, or even if it is grieving, you know, a lost dream or lost pet or whatever it is, just don’t have to pretend that it doesn’t matter. You know, again, the people who care about you, they’re going to be there to support you. And the ones that don’t, that’s their problem, not yours. And you don’t need to worry about them. Now, I know sometimes when you are in gatherings or just, you know, in conversation with people, we oftentimes don’t know what to say when someone is going through grief. What to Say When People Make Hurtful Comments About Your Grief And it can be really hard to hear these things. And so I put together a PDF with a list of responses you can use during those moments when people say things like, you know, shouldn’t you be better by now or over it? You know, it’s been a long time. Or, you know, they wouldn’t want you to be sad. Or when someone was trying to get me to sign up for a program, oh, they would want you to do this. Like how the heck do you know? You don’t know my sister. You don’t know that she would want me to jump into this coaching program like, you know, six months after she passed. You don’t know that. That’s another story. I may tell that story one day on the show. Anyway. So anyway, I’m going to put the link in the show notes. It will be right there. All you got to do is download it. You don’t even have to give me your email or anything. It’s my gift to you for this holiday season. So yeah, I’ll have it in the show notes. So if you’re listening to this somewhere, check it out there. I’ll also put it, yeah, I’ll put a link to it in the YouTube description as well so you can download it. Self-Care Practices for the Grieving Heart Give yourself space to cry also. You know? Or light a candle in their memory. Look at photos. Maybe write them a letter. That might be useful. Let them know how you feel about them leaving or whatever it is. Even write a letter about your dream. Write a letter to your business and say I’m really sorry that you’re not here anymore. I really wanted this to succeed. You can do that as well. And last thing, and I think I mentioned this a little bit earlier, is get support. This one, yeah, this really made a difference in my life, let me tell you, because healing happens in community. Why Community Support Is Essential for Healing It is so important to be with people who understand that grief isn’t linear, you know, that it has its own timeline. And also that to have someone there to listen to you that isn’t going to try to fix you. They’re just going to hold space for you. It’s so important. And so, you know, maybe it’s a counselor. I reached out to a counselor and worked with them for a while. Maybe it’s a grief group. I did that as well. It’s great. You know, friends, you know, if you’ve got a good friend you can talk to, they’re so they can be so supportive. Maybe you go on a retreat. I actually went on a one day retreat. Yeah. And met a wonderful woman there. And actually a bunch of other lovely ladies. And they we had this talking circle and I wound up crying during it. And they were so great and holding support for me. So, you know, or maybe it’s an online community. I think there’s probably you go on Facebook, I’m sure there are all kinds of grief groups there that provide support. Whatever it is, just know you don’t have to get through this alone. And you’re not going to always feel this heavy. Really, I can promise you that. Because like I said, I’ve gone through a lot of loss in my life. And it’s hard in the moment. And it’s hard, you know, maybe even that first year, maybe even two years, whatever. But you will get through it. And right now, however you’re feeling right now is okay. It’s how you’re supposed to feel. It’s or maybe that’s how you’re supposed to feel. But it’s just it’s what you’re feeling and that’s okay. You’re human. You can own those feelings. And just know that it’s what’s right for you. The Good Grief Retreat: A Safe Space for Healing So if you’re navigating this journey and you’ve been doing it alone or maybe you’ve tried a bunch of different things, you know, you’ve done the counselor route, you’ve done the grief support group and you still feel like you need something else, I want you to know something is that I’m actually co-facilitating a grief retreat in June 2026. And I’m doing it with my lovely friend Patricia, who I mentioned that I attended her retreat. And so we actually, the two of us came up with this idea, but we also have, we’re also bringing along Patricia’s daughter, Jess, and another wonderful woman that Patricia has worked with, Catherine. And so the four of us are coming together to host this retreat in the Blue Ridge Mountains in North Carolina in June, like I said, June in 2026. And it’s called the Good Grief Retreat. And when Patricia and I came up with this idea, we, yeah, we just thought that name was so good because for one thing it conjures up, you know, the old Charlie Brown comic strip where he would always say, good, or would he say good grief, or maybe Lucy would say good grief, Charlie Brown. What You’ll Experience at the Good Grief Retreat But it’s also a way of saying that grief can be good. It is good. It’s a human emotion and we’re allowed to feel it and we’re allowed to heal it. And that’s what this is for. It’s to help women who are going through any type of loss, you know, like we talked about today, death, divorce, transition, your dreams, your identity. And we’re putting together this three days of safe space where you’ll have a community. And it’ll be, we’re offering some healing modalities to help and support talking circles like I experienced. And I’m going to put the link in the show notes as well as I also have it up here on the video for you as well. But I will put it in the YouTube description as well. And, you know, you can just go there if you want to learn more about it. Got a lot of good information on there. No pressure, just an invitation. Because you deserve support. You really do. And as I said, healing happens in community. That’s the best place for it. So before we end today’s episode, and I hope you’re subscribed if you’re not already. And especially if you haven’t have gotten some value out of today’s, you know, you’re going to want to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite platform or on YouTube. Light Language Healing for Grief and the Holidays But I want to now invite you to settle your nervous system a little bit. Help you find some peace as we head into the thick of the holiday season. And hopefully help you to lighten your load a little bit. So I want to share my modality which is light language. And it’s a lovely multi dimensional form of communication that speaks to your heart, speaks to your soul. Not necessarily something you’re going to understand with your logical mind. And that’s okay. You don’t have to. And I would encourage you to listen to this when you can be in a place where you can be still and quiet and not focused on anything else. Preparing for the Light Language Session So if you’re listening to this while you’re on a treadmill, or you’re driving a car, pause the podcast, come back to it later where you can be sitting in a nice comfortable chair. And you can just close your eyes if you like. Breathe in. And breathe out. And just set the intention that I do as well is that whatever you’re going to hear right now will be for your soul’s highest good. And the highest good of all concerned. And will help you in whatever way you need some support right now. Okay. Let’s see what comes through today. Yeah. So I hope that whatever is on your heart today is feeling a little lighter. And if later today it feels a little heavy again, that’s okay. You can always come back and listen to this again, you know. But also know that it’s normal. Like I said, grief comes in waves. And you know, sometimes they’ll knock you down. I was in the ocean not too long ago and waves knocked me down a couple times. So yeah, grief can do that to you. But you know what? You can get back up again. Now sometimes you might need to have somebody pick you up. My daughter was there to kind of help me get back on my feet again. And whoever that is for you, I hope you have them there to help you. And I’m here too. You know, if I can be of any support, you know, look me up. Final Encouragement: Give Yourself Grace This Holiday Season My wish for you is give yourself some grace. Enjoy the holiday season as best you can in whatever way works for you. Maybe it’s putting on a sad movie. Maybe it’s putting on a comedy. Do whatever feels right. Do some journaling maybe. Write a letter. Go for a walk. Meditate. But know that no matter what, even if you feel like you’re alone, you’re not. You are divine. You are a spiritual being living a human life. And you can always go within and ask for support. And you can go without and ask for support too. You can go reach out and get some support. So until we meet again next week, next Tuesday, I encourage you to go out and do your best to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

What story do you tell yourself when things don’t go as planned? Self-compassion for women over 50 isn’t about lowering your standards. It’s about releasing the grip of perfectionism that keeps you stuck. In this episode, I share the mortifying moment I almost ghosted three women who registered for my workshop… all because I made the fatal mistake my mother warned me about: assuming no one was there! What happened next reminded me why showing up matters more than showing up polished. And how my L.O.V.E. Method helped me move from self-criticism to self-grace in real time. Show Notes | Transcript This episode offers a real-world example of what self-compassion look like in action. Whether you’re running a business, navigating a transition, or simply trying to silence that inner critic, you’ll learn that self-compassion is a practice you can return to whenever things threaten to fall apart. What you’ll take away: Why assuming silence means rejection is a limiting belief worth examining A simple way to notice when self-criticism is running the show, and how to gently interrupt it How to apply the L.O.V.E. Method when you mess up (without spiraling) The gift of showing up imperfectly for yourself and those waiting for you If you’ve been holding back because you’re not “ready enough,” this episode is for you. Sometimes your greatest teaching moments come wrapped up in your biggest mistakes. Finding purpose after 50 starts with grace. Midlife reinvention begins when you stop waiting for perfect. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Self-Compassion for Women Over 50: From Self-Criticism to Self-Grace Introduction: What Self-Compassion Really Means After 50 Namaste. On the day of my awakening your inner light workshop, I almost ghosted three women who wanted to explore my love method. Not because I didn’t care, but because of one tiny notification setting and a big story I was telling myself. So today I am sharing what really happened and what it taught me about perfection and self trust and how you can use the love method the next time you mess up in your own life or business. But before we dive into all that, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. I am Gloria Grace, confidence catalyst who empowers women over 50 through my signature love method and energy healing to boldly live life on their terms. The Story Behind the Almost-Ghosted Workshop So if you, if you’re a regular subscriber to the podcast and you’ve listened to the last couple of episodes, I think I mentioned, or especially the last one, I think you I mentioned that I was doing this workshop and I was really excited because I had done it in person here in Florida, I guess almost two months ago now, and, and it was really lovely and I thought, well, if I could do it in person, why not do it online with Zoom and we can have breakout rooms and all that fun stuff. So that’s what I did. I, you know, decided I picked a date and, and set up the event and, you know, posted about it. And I wasn’t getting any emails from Zoom about anybody registering. And in fact, even right up until I know a lot of, lots of people wait until the last minute. And so I was doing some last minute promotion as well. And the day before the workshop, I, I’m checking my email, you know, searching for Zoom, and it’s like, nothing. I’m like, no. Oh, well, I guess it just wasn’t meant to be. And I went about my day and, and then the morning of the workshop, you know, again, I checked again to see if anybody had registered and you know, you know, again, there were no emails from Zoom. When Limiting Beliefs Almost Won You, you may be guessing where this is going already, right? So it got to be about, I don’t know, maybe 10 minutes before 2 o’. Clock. I was going to do this at 2 o’ clock in the afternoon, I think Eastern time. So, but I don’t know, 15 minutes or 10 minutes before I, for whatever reason, my higher self was telling me, go log on to Zoom. Log on to Zoom and check and just double check to see if anybody had registered. And so I did. And when I logged on, I saw that three people had registered. I’m. For those of you who are listening, I’m doing my home alone impression of, oh shoot. What was, what was the character’s name that Macaulay Culkin played? I forget. Oh God, I should know it. But anyway, I’m doing my best, you know, or, and it’s also the, what is it? The Munch painting of the. Oh, so holy. Holy moly. I’m like, okay, I’ve got three people that are expecting me to do a workshop in like a few minutes. Showing Up Imperfectly: What Happened Next So I like hurriedly went around my office trying to find the notes I had. I had like these like, I don’t know, three by five cards or maybe even five by seven cards that I. Index cards that I had put together for the, the in person workshop that had all my lovely notes about everything. And so I still never found them. I don’t know where they went. One of these days they’ll show up, I guess. But thankfully I also knew before I created the cards that I had put an outline together on Google Drive. So I went to Google Drive, found that, printed it out. I was like, okay, all right. It’s like. Because I, I knew in general what I wanted to do, but I also wanted to refresh my memory and so, so I did that. So I got, so I got my notes and I, I went into the Zoom and there was one woman, someone I, I know actually I knew all three people who had signed up as well. So they, they weren’t complete strangers, which was very fortunate for me. So, so this one woman was there and, and she showed up and, and I said, you know, I’m so sorry. I like explained the whole thing to her that I didn’t get any notifications and I didn’t know anybody had signed up and, and, and, and she was the only person there. Now it was already about couple minutes after the start of the workshop and so she’s like, well, maybe you should check with the other people. And I’m like, yeah, I think that’s a good idea. So, so I left the room and went and sent emails out to the other two ladies and, and then came back into Zoom. And then sure enough, within a couple more minutes they both came in and now I’m going to breathe. Ah. Because that’s what I was able to do then is to breathe and apologize and say, and to thank them for showing up and, and I went into the workshop what I wanted to share and it wasn’t as polished as I had intended it to be. The Power of Done Over Perfect And I know I had. Yeah, I didn’t quite do things in exact order that I wanted to do them either, but I did get all the we. I did the explanation of what the love method stands for. We did some experiential exercises. They got to do some, you know, reflections back and forth. We did some sharing, they did some journaling. And all in all, it turned out lovely. And they gave me some wonderful testimonials, which I just realized that I didn’t. I was going to look them up before I started recording this podcast to tell you what they are. So you know what? I’m going to pause for one quick second and find them and then I’m going to come and then I’ll continue the recording so I can get them. Because I can do this. I have control. Haha. So I’ll be right back and you won’t even notice how long I’ve been gone. What the Workshop Participants Said I love technology because, see, I’m right back and I have, I have their feedback forms. So I’m going to share with you a little bit about what they said. So one of the comments said, thank you for a delightful workshop. The processes you shared were simple to grasp, very meaningful, and showed exciting originality. I recommend it to anyone seeking fresh tools for enlightening their life. And let’s see, the other next person said, yeah, the workshop was simple, interactive, personally fulfilling and informative. I’m open to this information and appreciate your personal guidance. And I also shared some light language and she loved that as well. She hadn’t heard that before. And let’s see. And then the last person said that, yeah, what, what they liked about the workshop was that it teaches you to listen to your inner intuition and to trust in God. And she loved breaking in, you know, doing the breakout rooms. And yeah, so I felt, I felt so great reading these, this feedback and knowing that showing up, showing up, that’s, that’s, that’s one of the lessons learned here is that it’s important to show up. And, and the, the first lesson, actually. Well, one of, one of the lessons that came to me also was I should have heeded my mother’s warning. Never Assume: Lessons Learned from Tech Mistakes She always taught me to never assume. You know why? Because you make an a-s-s out of you and me. And so I just assumed that, that everything was right, set up with, with zoom, and that, you know, maybe it was some fault of theirs that they didn’t send me notifications. Well, joke’s on me because it was operator air. I am the person who didn’t set up the notifications so that it would let me know when someone registered. So I put a note on my notes for the workshop that the next Time I run it when I set it up in zoom to check, check and make sure that I have those notifications on. Ah. Oh, my goodness. What. What an interesting. What an interesting experience. So what does all this mean for you? Well, before I get into that, I just want to take a moment. Hopefully you’re not turned off so far, but I want to invite you to subscribe to the podcast if you aren’t already, because, you know, either on your favorite podcast platform like Apple or, you know, wherever, Spotify, or on YouTube. And, you know, it’s the holiday season now, so maybe when you’re wrapping gifts, you could listen to an episode, listen to one of our past episodes, see what, see what calls to you and just wanted to want to put that plug in there. Practicing Self-Compassion When You Mess Up So, like I said, what does this mean for you? Well, give yourself grace. When you mess up, don’t worry about being perfect. You know, I, I was honest with the participants and I, you know, I let them know that I almost didn’t show up, you know, because I didn’t, I didn’t think anyone had registered. Talk about a limiting belief there. And double check settings when using automation, for sure. And it’s really, when I think about it, it’s about practicing the love method. So for those of you who don’t know what that is, the L stands for let go and let God. So in this case, it is letting go of perfection and after the fact, letting go of self criticism. The L.O.V.E. Method for Overcoming Self-Doubt The O is opening your heart to receive, so it’s opening your heart to unexpected blessings. The V is valuing your uniqueness. So in my case, it was valuing the content I had to share and the exercises that I knew would be valuable to my attendees and, and showing up. And then, and then finally the E is embrace your divinity. And so that is acknowledging that I’m a perfect spiritual being living in an imperfect human body and encompassing this imperfectly human life. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. The. You know, and there’s probably more lessons and if you know of any that I missed, you know, reach out to me. I’m on social media. LinkedIn is, is one of the places that I am hanging out the most these days. So connect with me on LinkedIn at Gloria Grace Rand. And yeah, pointed out to me because I, I feel like I’m missing something else. But I do think that the most important thing, actually, now that I think about it, yeah, I think the most important thing was that, and this is something that I pride myself on, is I, I could have just showed up to that zoom when, when I logged into the Zoom Room and I saw the one woman there, I could have said, you know, and in fact I had was even thinking that, you know what? I, why don’t we just reschedule and I’ll come back, you know, we’ll do it again later. Why Showing Up Matters More Than Being Ready And I could have very easily done that, But I don’t like giving up and I don’t like quitting. I, yeah, that, that’s just not something I like to do. I, and it was, it was my responsibility. I set up this event and I needed to show up. Those people were kind enough to register. The least I could do, the very least I could do was show up. So, yeah, I, I, I think that’s so important. So I thought what I would do right now is share with you. Light Language Healing: Connecting with Your Higher Self A message from, from multi, the multi dimensional places that I share messages from. And this was, this was part of, when I did the, the workshop with them, as I, I mentioned. I. Part of embracing your divinity is embracing that we are spiritual beings and emotional and we have this connection with source, God, the universe, however you respond to it. So my way of connecting with all of that is through a modality called light language. And it is something that I share on the podcast when I do solo episodes like this. And it’s, it’s truly a language of love. It’s, it’s something that speaks to your heart, speaks to your soul, and it’s very healing. It’s, it’s helps you release what doesn’t serve you anymore, really. It’s, it’s clearing out what doesn’t serve you anymore. And yeah, I, I’m, I’m just really being called to just share that with you right now. And, and don’t wor, you don’t necessarily understand what I speak or sing, depending. Just trust that this message is for your soul’s highest good. And that’s the intention that I’m going to set, is that it is for your soul’s highest good. So if you’re listening to this while you’re driving your car, I would encourage you to pause it right now and come back to this sometime when you can be seated and so that you can really be hopefully not disturbed so you know, somewhere quiet and, and just set an intention for yourself that what you’re going to hear is for your soul’s highest good. How to Receive This Energy Healing Message And if you have a particular challenge that you’re going through right now, ask that it will help you with that as well. Because again, this is, it’s, it’s a multi Dimensional form of communication, and it addresses whoever is listening to it. It addresses what you need. That’s what’s so cool about it. And, and for me, sharing it helps me as well. So I, I, it’s. I do it for selfish reasons, too, because it’s, it’s really good for my soul and, and releases what I released or what I don’t need to carry anymore. I should say so. Yeah. So, okay, so I invite you right now. I’m hoping that you have already paused this and you’re back now listening and that you’re comfortable. And I was very, very excited talking today, so I’m going to take a deep breath right now and encourage you to do the same. Let’s just take one together. Breathe in and let go. Let me do one more. Oh, yeah, that feels better. I feel a little more grounded now. That’s important. I need to be grounded, especially when I decide to connect with the, the ethers. So I want to be grounded first. All right, let’s see what comes through for you today and for me… After the Light Language: Invitation to Go Deeper I hope you received that with the love it was intended, and hopefully it lightens your heart today because, yeah, that’s what it’s intended for. And if you would ever like to have a personalized session with me, please reach out. You can, you can schedule it at Bitly Forward, slash, capital L, capital L, capital E, lowercase podcast 30. Oh, that’s right. I’m like, what does the LLE stand for? Oh, yeah, Live Love Engage. Hello. Name of the podcast. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, you know, it’s, it’s as I’m recording this, it’s the day before. Thanks. Thanksgiving. And, you know, I think there’s a lot of energy in the air, a lot of holiday angst. And yeah, I was going to tell you a story, but I’m thinking that might be a good story to share with you next week, especially as we get really into the thick of the holiday season. So, yeah, I’m not gonna, I’m not gonna share it right now. Sorry. See, you got to be subscribed if you want to. If you want to know what’s coming up. Podcast Rebrand Announcement: Design Your Life, Your Way And, And I will tell you again, just as a, As a quick reminder, Live Love Engage, as it in this format only has about. We’re going to do about four. At least four more episodes. There may be a few more, but I’m hoping my intention is in January. I’m not sure exactly when, but I’m hoping in January of 2026 that we will have a new name. The podcast is going to be called design your life your way. And that’s what we’re really going to be talking about in detail every week. And I’m also going to bring on some wonderful guests who will also share from their perspective how you can really create a life that you want to live that serves you, that really does serve you. So, yeah, today’s episode is a little bit shorter than I normally do, but you know what I think? I think that’s a good thing because we’re busy. We’re all busy this time of year, right? Absolutely. Final Thoughts: Your Gifts Are Needed Even When It’s Quiet So if there is one thing I hope you take from my almost ghosted workshop, it is this. Your gifts are needed even when our notifications are silent. Let go of perfection. Open your heart to the unexpected. Yes. Value what you have to share. Embrace that part of you that showed up anyway. And maybe take a moment this week to ask yourself, is there a place in your life or business where you’ve assumed no one’s there and is it a time to check it again? So, yeah, give that a thought. And until we meet again next week, these episodes drop on Tuesdays. By the way, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

What if the most powerful CEO move isn’t fixing yourself, but befriending the dark side of yourself you’ve been hiding? In this revealing episode, I get real about the shadow side of entrepreneurship. Drawing from my own journey as a people-pleasing copywriter to a confident midlife guide, I share how our deepest wounds (control issues, perfectionism, conflict avoidance) secretly run our businesses. Instead of another self-improvement pep talk, you’ll get something radical: permission to stop fixing and start feeling. Show Notes | Transcript Discover: The 4 Personal Power Archetypes—and which shadow patterns are quietly sabotaging your success Practical ways to apply the L.O.V.E. Method to transform your CEO mindset Why your “broken” parts are actually strategic advantages waiting to be embraced Ready to make peace with your shadows and lead from your whole self? Be sure to listen all the way to the end of this episode to hear a light language transmission designed to help you reconnect with what matters most. Resources: Discover your Personal Power Archetype: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – Stop “Fixing” Yourself – Start Leading from Your Dark Side The Confidence Catalyst’s Confession I’m curious about all of you business owners who are listening or watching to this podcast today. Who’s really sitting in that CEO chair? Your highest self or your shadow self? Well, no matter how you answered that question, I’ve got good news for you. Because today we’re going to be talking about, well, I should say, actually, we’re not going to be talking about fixing what’s quote unquote broken. Instead, we’re going to talk about how to make friends with the parts of yourself you’d rather keep hidden. But before we get started, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. I am Gloria Grace, confident confidence catalyst, who’s having trouble speaking today. But that’s okay. Hey, you know, we’re not perfect. What the heck? Let me try it again. I am Gloria Grace confidence catalyst who empowers women over 50 through my love method and energy healing to boldly live life on their terms. Operating from Shadow Self vs. Highest Self in Business So, yeah, being the CEO. Hmm. Are you the, Are you, are you operating from your highest self or is it your shadow self? You? And for me, I know I’ve definitely operated from that shadow self in my career as, as a business owner or entrepreneur or even just starting out as a freelance SEO copywriter. When Hiring Help Triggers Control Issues The. You know, I’ve talked about this on the show before and I know if you were a business owner, you’ve probably, probably heard this many times from lots of different people that if you want to grow your business, eventually you can’t just be the sole person in your business. You need to hire help, you know, even if it’s just on a part time basis. And I reached that point in my business where I realized that if I wanted to be able to continue serving my clients at a high level, that I needed to get help with managing like social media marketing, for crying out loud, and emails and all of that. And so I decided to hire a virtual assistant. Great, right? You’d think, except that I started getting very frustrated with her because she wasn’t doing what I wanted her to do and she wasn’t communicating with me very well. And I finally gave up and said, you know, this isn’t working and I’m just not going to need your services anymore. Even though I really did need her services, the problem was not really with her. Now, first off, I should, I should have backed up and said that I had been really reluctant to hire someone for a long time because when you start your business and it’s your baby, you know, you, you don’t like turning over control, especially because, and, and this was Part of my issue with her is that I felt like she wasn’t doing as good a job as I could do in some of these areas. And where it was take, maybe it was taking longer. I don’t know. This was a long time ago now, but it was just really frustrating. I think it was mostly that she wasn’t doing things the way I would have done. And because I wanted. Setting Clear Expectations: The Key to Delegation Success I have this idea of how it was supposed to be, and that’s kind of a control issue. But as I said, it really wasn’t her fault necessarily. She was doing what she thought was right. The problem was I didn’t set expectations at the beginning. I did not give her a clear, even instruction on how I wanted things done. I didn’t, you know, do like. Like nowadays I could do a nice screen capture, you know, and go through how I do things. And then I could have just given her that video and said, okay, this is how I do it. I’d like you to do it this way. Unless you have a more efficient way of doing it, which is. I’m also open to. And. And I should have said that I want to hear from you on, you know, Fridays or, you know, and so we can over what you did during the week. And then these are my plans for the following week, which the next time I decided to hire someone. That’s what I did. And we had a much better relationship. Even when at one point she messed up and with something with my email, I remember, and she was so apologetic. She was so sorry. And it was like, you know, it’s okay. You know, you’re human, you make mistakes. We fixed it and, you know, it was okay, but we had a much better relationship because I set up expectations. And then I also, you know, made. Made peace with that part of myself that want to be in control. And I allowed her to come up with some better ways to do things, because not everybody is gonna. Somebody might have experience in an area that maybe I. I did, but she might have a more efficient way or a more efficient way that works for her. Honoring Different Working Styles and Personalities Yeah, let me. Let me clarify that because, you know, I think two people can attack a problem in a certain way, and they may think that this is the best way. Sure, it is for them. It’s for their personality, and that’s why it works. But somebody else would look at, say, that’s crazy. I’m never going to create graphics that way. Are you insane? You know, as an example, that’s going to take me too long to do. No, I’d much Rather do it this way, and because that’s their personality, that’s their experience, and that’s how they’ve learned to do it, and it does work for them. So we have to be able to let go. We got to let go of that, that. That tendency to control. And where does this come from? The Roots of Control Issues and Shadow Behaviors Well, you know, wanting to be in control for me certainly came up growing up in a home where a lot of stuff was out of my control. There was a lot of family dysfunction. Growing Up with Alcoholism and Family Dysfunction You know, my dad struggled with alcoholism, and then my mom was trying to deal with that and keep. Keep a roof over her head. You know, she. She had to wound up taking a job. You know, she was working in the 70s. So we had two income families way back in the 70s. I know now it’s, you know, much more common, but it wasn’t necessarily that common back then. And I think one of the reasons was, is she couldn’t necessarily rely on my dad. So she decided to take another, take a job. And. And some of these shadows also. So. So that’s definitely one of my control issues, because I didn’t. I would come home for school and not know, you know, what condition was dad going to be in, you know, and so in my life, wherever I could have control, I wanted to have control. People Pleasing and Perfectionism: The Good Girl Syndrome And that also led to other shadows that might show up in our. Not only in our personal lives, but in our business, which is things like people pleasing and perfectionism. Because also I was. I was the baby of the family. So I had. I had two older siblings. I had an older brother and an older sister. My older brother was 14 years older than me, and my sister was 10 years older than me. So really I was like truly the. The caboose, my mother liked to say in the family. So because they were so much older, and especially as I was growing up, they. My sister was a teenager. And so, you know, there’s a lot of angst that goes on in those teenage years. And so I would see the fights that my sister and my mother had. My brother had joined the Navy. He left the house. He was like, I’m out of here. So I didn’t even really get to know him that much as a kid, which is a great regret of mine. However, I decided that I was going to be the good girl in the family. I was going to do my best to not arouse the ire of my mother because she had a really good, quick, explosive temper, and I didn’t like that. How Shadow Behaviors Show Up in Your Business So. So again, this led to things like being conflict, avoidance, and as a being in business, boy, you know, And I wrote about this in my book, Live Love, Engage how to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself. Because these things showed up in my business. These. These shadows that I had of, well, wanting to be in control, for one thing, but also conflict avoidance, where. Conflict Avoidance and Pricing Your Worth I know I’ve probably talked about this on the. On the show before, but one of my first steady clients was with a web designer for home builders, and she would have me write blog articles for her different clients. And so it was great. You know, I was doing. Writing blog articles every month. I had this steady income coming in. It was awesome. And I was doing good work. She liked my work. And so she hired me year after year. And it took me probably until maybe year five of working for her, maybe maybe year four, but definitely year five, I think, for sure, before I have the courage to ask for a raise. And see, when I first started, she got me really cheap because I was brand new at being a copywriter, and so I didn’t charge her a lot, but I should have been raising my rates at least a little bit every year, especially because they appreciated my value. You know, they knew they were getting good work for me, and they most likely would have been willing to pay it. So when I did finally ask for that raise, they were like, sure, okay, no problem. I was like, oh, how much money have I, you know, lost out on? Because I didn’t have that confidence in myself also, that confidence. And I was afraid that they would say no. And so I’m just, you know, gonna go with the flow. The Power of Awareness in Creating Change Oh, well, it’s okay. I’ve learned. And that’s. And that’s the beauty of it, is that even if you are exhibiting some of these behaviors in your business now, you can change. The first step to change is awareness. So, yeah, you know, it’s. Yeah, I’m looking at my notes here. Common Causes of Shadow Self Development Yeah, a lot of. Well, yeah, I’ll just mention a few. Few of these ways. Other. Other places or reasons why some of these shadows come up. Parental criticism, high expectations, you know, abuse, neglect. Also bullying. You know, I. And social rejection plays a role in some of that. And I was. Middle School Bullying and Social Rejection You know, middle school is a tough time, and I had to take a bus to school, to our. Well, junior high. We called it junior high. Where I went, and I had a. I had to take a bus. And in the neighborhood I lived in, it was mostly boys. So middle school, taking a bus, surrounded by boys. No other girl to. To that I could, you know, partner up with. So I was like at the mercy of these kids who love to pick on me. And I was, I was an easy target. I had low self esteem, especially in middle school. It got better in high school. High school was a better time for me. But middle school, yeah, it was rough. So thankfully, thankfully, I got through it. And I’m so glad that I grew up when I did and not have. Have to deal with the added pressure of social media. I, I feel so, such compassion for these kids who have been growing up in the age of social media and the social media bullying that is out there. But anyway, I digress. That’s. That’s a topic for another day or another show, whatever. Let’s focus, Gloria. Focus. Okay. All right. Understanding Your Personal Power Archetype So I want to. I want to dive in deep and, and talk a little bit about archetypes and how, how you as a business owner might be showing up and, and how these shadows may show up and then what you can do to, to start making peace with them and to be able to. What do I want to say? I guess not only make peace with them, but also then to be able to. To then. Introducing the Four Personal Power Archetypes What am I trying to say? What am I trying to say? To make peace with your shadow so that you can then embrace and, and really lean into your strengths. Yeah, that’s what I want to say. That’s what I want to say. Okay, so I, it was interesting. I, I do. I. I will let you know that sometimes I do use AI to help me develop an outline for my podcast episodes. And so they came up with this wonderful idea of this boardroom and all of these lovely archetypes. And I was looking at this the other day going, I have my own archetypes. Wait a minute. I’ve done this work before, and yes, I have. And in fact, I did. I created a whole quiz where you can discover your personal power archetype as a midlife entrepreneur and you can take the quiz. In fact, you might even want to. Oh, yeah, let’s see. I didn’t even have this in my notes. This is a good idea I’m having right now. Thank you, higher Self, for helping me out. You might want to pause this, Pause this podcast right now and go take my quiz. You can go to Bit Ly Personal Power Quiz, and each word is capitalized. So, so it’s Personal Power Quiz, or just go to my website. Just go to gloriarand.com actually, and you’ll see the link for it right there up on top. Go to gloriarand.com or gloria gracerand.com either way, they’ll both take you there and take the quiz and see what your personal power archetype is and then come back because I’m gonna then explain it. So I’m gonna just leave that banner up there for, for a while for those watching on YouTube. So, so there are four, four archetypes that I came up with. There is the abundant receiver. There is the spiritual visionary. There is the intuitive navigator, and the authentic originator. Archetype #1: The Abundant Receiver Strengths of the Abundant Receiver So the abundant receiver is great at attracting opportunities in business. That’s, that’s, that’s your superpower. But the shadow comes in is where you are not fully trusting your intuition, especially when it contradicts conventional wisdom. You may also not be boldly, boldly expressing what makes you unique in the marketplace. And you might also struggle with integrating your spiritual wisdom into your business practice. Making Friends with Your Shadow: The L.O.V.E. Method’s “Let Go and Let God” So to start making friends with the shadow side and to start really, fully embracing it, I recommend practicing the L in the love method, which stands for let go and let God. So the way that you can do this is before making any business decision, you can do an intuition check in. So take three deep breaths. Let’s even do it right now. Go. Breathe in. And breathe in again. One more time. Oh, that feels good. That helped me calm down a little. But then ask yourself, what does my inner wisdom know about this? And then just be still for a moment and see what comes through. And the first response that is going to come through, most likely, especially after you’ve calmed yourself down, that’s going to be not from your analytical mind. It’s going to be from that higher self, that deeper knowing. So, so I hope. You hope you’re taking notes. I should have said take some notes today. Well, yeah, you can go back and listen to this again. It’s okay. Anyway, all right, the next archetype is the spiritual visionary. Archetype #2: The Spiritual Visionary Recognizing the Spiritual Visionary’s Gifts Now, this is someone whose spiritual connection serves them well. In business. You really do are leaning into your intuition most of the time. But this is where the shadow comes in. Because sometimes, you know, you might still have a little bit of struggle where you’re not fully surrendering. And when things don’t go as planned, especially you may also be struggling with money like I, like I talked about, you know, in not asking for a raise or, you know, you’re not receiving abundant compensation for your wonderful spiritual gifts. And you might also not be clearly stating your value to those, especially those who might not share your spiritual perspective. You might be holding back a little bit. Practice: Open Your Heart to Receive So you can start making friends with this, these, you know, wonderful wonder. Well, wonderful well, these expressions that maybe aren’t quite serving you as well as they should be, you can start to start to reframe and. Readdress, I guess by practicing the O in the L.O.V.E. Method, which is open your heart to receive. So what I recommend is each morning you do a gratitude and worthiness ritual where you write down three things that you’re grateful for. Well, specifically grateful to receive in your business. You know, maybe it is a new client, or maybe you’re grateful to receive inspiration that helped you create a new product. Or maybe it’s you’re grateful that you have somebody wants to work with you on a project. Like, I’m fortunate enough that I’m going to be co facilitating a retreat in June of 2026 with three other wonderful women. And you’re, you’re going to hear more about that soon. Very, very, very soon. Maybe even at the end of this podcast I might talk about it again. But anyway, I also want to, after you write down the three things you’re grateful to receive in your business, write this sentence down and say, I am worthy of receiving xyz. So maybe it is I’m worthy of receiving a new client because I am amazing or because I deserve to be successful. Whatever, whatever feels good to you. But yeah, and I will tell you, if you get the quiz, if you do take the quiz, and I encourage you to do this, you’re going to get this information in emails from me. So, so you don’t have to necessarily write it down right now. You can take the quiz and then you’ll get an email and it’ll tell you all this stuff and then you can follow these. But I just want to plant the seed right now so you can hopefully do that. So, all right, so we did the Abundant Receiver. We did the Spiritual Visionary. Archetype #3: The Intuitive Navigator How Intuitive Navigators Make Decisions The third archetype is the Intuitive Navigator. And oh yeah, so I did get this a little bit confused. I was saying intuition on the other one, that one’s really more about your spiritual kind of your spiritual beliefs. So this one really is someone who relies on their intuition to make decisions. But you still, that shadow side comes up where you’re maybe struggling to fully value what is unique about you. And, and then you’re not charging what you’re worth. You might also be not actively promoting your business as well as you should. And, and you’re also maybe not quite embracing your role as a wisdom keeper in your field. Value Your Uniqueness: Finding What Sets You Apart So for this one, I recommend following the V in L.O.V.E., which is value your uniqueness. So this is, I even have, I have this in my book as well, is so as one of the practices, so take five minutes, maybe every day for at least a week to write down one unique quality or experience or perspective you bring to your business that no one else can offer exactly like you do, and then ask yourself, how can I showcase this gift more prominently today? So I think for me, one of the, one of the, I think, I guess you know, what is one of my, I guess I’ve got a couple unique qualities that I bring and, and one of which was even when I first started, when I first started my doing SEO copywriting in particular, I happened to mention to my mentor at the time that I used to be a writer and a producer for the Nightly Business Report on public television. And she’s like, omg, you need to talk about that. You need to, you need to make that prominent in your, you know, bio and, and in your, even in your contracts and because as a producer and a writer, I learned how to really distill information down complex economic stories into like 30 second sound bites. And that’s the same type of skill that’s necessary for your website. And I was like, oh yeah, that makes sense. So see, if you have something similar, you know, what’s, what’s your, what’s something really unique about you that you’re pretty sure nobody else can do or, or you’ve experienced and then start talking about that fact. I might even start talking more about that myself again. Even though it’s been a long time now, but, but it still serves me well. Archetype #4: The Authentic Originator All right. Finally, the last archetype is the authentic originator. Standing Out from the Crowd with Authenticity And this is someone, I think this is probably someone who’s a little bit more extroverted because they are comfortable standing up from the crowd. They are, they are fine at tooting their own horn. I need more authentic origination in myself. See, and, and this is the thing too. I’ll get back to this, this archetype in a second. Shadow Work Is an Ongoing Journey But I just want to, well, it’s on my mind. I want to let you know, is that, that these shadows will still come up, you know, even, even, I think from time to time. And, and even as we, you know, learn to kind of love them and, and, and honor them and say, okay, yeah, thank you, thank you for. I see how I’m expressing you in my life and I want to change course a little bit, not do that as much. So stuff is still going to come up, but eventually it gets easier. You, you, you start recognizing these things more quickly. I know for me, I definitely, I Do see. See old patterns. And in fact, I talked about this on an episode. Was it last week? Maybe. I’m not sure. Yeah, it probably was because it was right after my son’s wedding how I. I had this old, not good enough feeling come up at the wedding, but go back and find that I’m not going to get into with that now anyway. The Authentic Originator’s Shadow Side All right, so authentic originator. So, yeah, they’re comfortable. They’re comfortable on their skin. They’re comfortable, you know, saying, you know, this is who I am and what I do. However, where the shadow comes in is that they may still not be fully trusting their own intuition and they’re reluctant to surrender control. So they might also be struggling with, then opening their self up, opening your heart, you know, to receive support and abundance. And, and maybe they’re also not. Maybe they, they really are feeling very spiritual, but they’re not sure how to connect that business to that deeper spiritual purpose. Embrace Your Divinity: Connecting Business to Spiritual Purpose So this is where the E in the L.O.V.E. Method comes in, which is embrace your divinity. So if you find yourself struggling with, you know, these shadows and, and find yourself doing some of these things, or not doing, I should say, even as well. So what you could do is before work each day, you’re going to take those three, three deep breaths again. And now ask yourself, how is my business serving as a channel for divine energy today? What wants to express through me? And then allow your answer to guide your priorities for the day. Need to take a drink. Sip of. I need to take a sip of water. So I had. Pausing the recording for a second, but I still need to take another sip anyway. It’s Not About Fixing What’s Broken Okay, so. So those are the archetypes. And, and I want to get back to this part about. And I know in a way I’ve kind of been. I think I contradicted myself in the beginning when I said we’re not going to focus on fixing what’s, quote, unquote broken. Well, that’s true. We’re not. And even though I was giving you some suggestions of practices to do, it’s not to fix you. It’s really not. It’s more about helping you to fully embrace who you are and, and to, and to recognize that, yes, you may excel in one particular area and there’s other areas that you can also learn to embrace and to get better at, because then you’ll be a really whole business owner where you can. Be the best that you can be and, and know that. There’s always going to be room for improvement. The Four Agreements: Always Do Your Best So I’m looking, I’m looking over the side of my computer I’ve got, I have the four agreements. I’ve got a lovely little, it’s like a bookmark and it lists the four agreements. And, and I’m just going to share with you number four, which is always do your best. And it says your best is going to change from moment to moment. It will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick under any circumstance. Simply do your best and you will avoid self judgment, self doubt and regret. I mean right there, that’s it. And, and, and that’s it. And so, so yes, there may, you know, these shadows that come up, you know, the self doubt and self judgment and things, they’re going to come up and you from time to time. Essential Practices for Shadow Work and Self-Love But when you can start doing some of these different practices and, and, and really my favorite practice of all time. Well, I’ve got two. The Power of Stillness and Meditation But the number one is, is spending time in the quiet. So whether that’s a walking meditation or sitting meditation, but just being still and getting to know yourself, that is going to do wonders for you because that’s when you can really just love yourself. I mean that’s what this is all about. I mean that’s what these archetypes are all about, really are about showing you the how, showing you love in practice and, and how to love yourself. Because that’s what it all comes down to. Self-Forgiveness and Compassion And, and when we can love our shadows and just, you know, and practice self forgiveness and say, yeah, okay, I wasn’t as confident in that experience as I wanted to be. Well, let’s see if we can do better next time. That’s it, that’s what it’s all about. It’s not, it’s not about beating ourselves up over stuff. I’ve done that and I had a coach call me out on that one time because she, she was like, Gloria, stop, stop beating yourself up. It doesn’t do any good. So we just have to just acknowledge we’re human. Okay, we are, we are spiritual beings at heart, but we are living in this human body and we’re living in this as a, as a human being. And so we’re gonna make mistakes, we’re gonna screw up sometimes. We’re gonna be, we’re going to have self doubt, we’re going to even have self judgment. We’re going to have some regrets. Do It Your Way: Your Personal Anthem for 2026 I’m thinking of this song. What is it? My Way. Yeah. Frank Sinatra. My, my mom loved this song. You know, regrets, I’ve had a few, but through it all, I don’t know that I’m not. I don’t even remember the exact words now, but, but I did it my way. And that’s what I encourage you to do is, is find a way, do it your way. And that’s what we’re going to be talking about very, very soon. And basically about starting in 2026, I’m going to be talking about designing your life your way. The podcast is going to have a new look. We’re not going to have the same background on YouTube anymore. It’s going to have a new look. We’ve got a new attitude, and we’re going to talk about just being you, you know, having the courage to be you, whatever that looks like, and just go boldly, boldly go where no one has gone before. You know, I, I’m a Star Trek fan and I, I love that. So we’re gonna do that. We’re gonna boldly go where no one has gone before. Wherever that is in your life, however that shows up for you, I want you to do that. I want you. I want that to be Your mantra in ’26, is that you’re gonna. You’re gonna design your life your way. Yeah. Subscribe and Take the Personal Power Quiz So before we end the podcast, I, I do want to, number one, I’m gonna encourage you right now to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform, whatever that is. Apple, Spotify, Pod Chaser, you know, there’s all kinds of places. If you’re on YouTube watching this, I hope you subscribe to the channel as well. So you’ll get notifications when I have the new episodes come out. And I now I want to offer you a. Something that’s unique about me. What I do is I share light language, the podcast specifically. When I do solo episodes. I don’t do it when I have a guest, which I will have guests again in the new year. Understanding Light Language So for those of you who, who may not be familiar with light language, just know that it is a form of communication that is a frequency of love. It’s something that I speak and I sing it. I never know quite how what’s going to show up. It just depends on whoever is inspiring me and coming through that day. So it’s something that. Especially when I sing. I was just reading an article today about how beneficial music is. Singing is for, for our, our brains. It just helps our brains work better. So if you’re somewhere where you’re driving in a car, I encourage you to pause the podcast and come back and, and be somewhere where you can just be still and maybe close your eyes and Just allow whatever I share with you to just wash over you. Just, just encourage you to come to it with an open heart. Especially not, not even a mind, just an open heart. And, and just let the sound touch your soul. And I always do is when I get ready to do this is I, I ask that and I ask my angels, archangels, galactic beings, elementals to share a message with me that’s for my soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. So I’m inviting you to also set that intention that the message you are going to receive today will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all. So just going to pause for a moment and then see what comes through today. Shanokuri… Closing and Resources Hope you. Hope you receive that with the love was intended. And if you want to know more about light language, go to my website, go to gloria rand.com you’ll learn all about it. I also offer light language, private light language sessions online. So excuse me, you can, you can get all that information there. So again, one last time, I do want to encourage you again to take my free quiz. Get your own personal power archetype and, and you’ll get all sorts of information. Like I said, you’ll get a. About 4 emails or so from me with sharing some more examples about how, how this looks and especially when you’re leaning into your gifts. So I hope you’ll do that again. It’s bit ly forward slash personal power quiz. And I’ll have that in the show notes of course as well. And as I said, you can also just go to my website, go to my website right on the homepage. You’ll see it right at the, up at the top and you can take the quiz right from there. So I think that’s going to do it for this week. So until next time. Oh, thank you for being here, number one. Yeah, thank you so much for being here. I am so grateful for everyone who listens to this podcast and yeah, it’s been, it’s been a great. I’ve got four more episodes with this incarnation and but then we’re gonna, like I said, 2026, we’re gonna have a new name, we get a new attitude and so, but stick around because there’s some good stuff yet to come and in the last bit of the month here, or last bit of the year actually. All right, take care and go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

What does finding grace look like when you’ve checked every box, built the life and business you were supposed to want, and still feel like something’s missing? In this intimate solo episode, I talk frankly about the quiet ache of achievement without fulfillment. Through personal stories and scientific research, you’ll be reminded why gratitude is not just about saying, “thank you.” It’s about building a life practice that brings more abundance, joy, and resilience. Show Notes | Transcript Gratitude isn’t just a feeling, it’s a necessary ingredient to living boldly, especially for women over 50. This episode highlights the mental and physical benefits of gratitude, and offers practical tips for fostering more gratitude in your life. You’ll also learn about upcoming changes to the podcast, plans for a transformative retreat in June, 2026, and an invitation to attend my Awakening Your Inner Light online workshop. You’ll discover: Why complaining becomes a habit (and how gratitude breaks the cycle) A simple nightly practice that strengthens your connection to something greater How to write gratitude letters that heal—even to those no longer here If you’re ready to stop performing and start feeling again, this episode is your permission slip. So, grab a cup of tea and let’s get into why gratitude truly is the “spice of life!” Resources: Attend the “Awakening Your Inner Light” workshop on Nov. 20, 2025: bit.ly/innerlight2025 Learn about the upcoming Good Grief Retreat: gloriarand.com/good-grief-retreat Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – Finding Grace When You’ve Done Everything Right (But Feel Empty) Welcome: The Power of Gratitude Practice for Women Over 50 Namaste. What are you grateful for today? Have you thought about being grateful for anything today? I hope you have. I’m grateful that you are here listening and or watching on YouTube. And that’s what we’re gonna be talking about today. We are talking about the power of gratitude, finding grace in gratitude, just appreciating gratitude for gratitude’s sake, all of that. And what that has to do with living life with purpose and living life fully and loving deeply and engaging authentically and all the wonderful things that we’ve been talking about on this podcast for, can you believe, the last six years? Yeah, it’s hard to believe that it’s been that long. I can’t believe it. But anyway, yeah, we’re gonna get into all that in just a second. But for those of you who seem to have just stumbled onto this podcast today, I wanna welcome you and introduce myself. I am Gloria Grace. I am a confidence catalyst who empowers women over 50 through my love method and energy healing. to boldly live life on their terms.   Finding Purpose Through Daily Gratitude And this is such a big topic for me, living life boldly and doing it with gratitude. Sorry, my eye just moved to, I have a vision board up on my wall, and in the middle of the vision board it says, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. And that’s really what it’s all about, isn’t it? I know life can be, challenging sometimes we all have our ups and downs when we’re trying to grow our business when we’re trying to just live life and especially this time of year as I’m recording this it is the middle of November and it’s actually my daughter’s birthday today as well. Happy birthday Allison and It’s, this is the time of year where things just start getting really hectic, you know, with holidays and end of the year planning. And we’ve talked about that on this podcast a little bit. And I know we’ve talked about gratitude as well, but since Thanksgiving is coming up in a couple of weeks, I figured let’s talk about it again because gratitude is the spice of life is what is coming to me.   Why Gratitude Matters for Living Authentically Well, yeah, I guess you could say that. I think. If you’re not grateful for being alive, if you’re not grateful for whatever you have, even being grateful for things you don’t have. Without that expression of gratitude in your life, Life can be pretty lonely and unpleasant even, and expressing gratitude It just gives us more to be grateful for. I mean, plain and simple. And like I said, I know I’ve, I probably talked about this when I was doing, earlier this year, I was doing these Wisdom Wednesday videos on LinkedIn. And I know that I definitely talked about gratitude on there. So if I haven’t talked about it on the podcast, you might want to. check me out on LinkedIn and see if you can find those old recordings somewhere. I’m sure if you search my name and then you search gratitude, maybe search Wisdom Wednesday as well, I’m sure it’ll come up.   How Gratitude Improves Mental Health and Well-Being So why is gratitude so important? Because I’ll tell you, for me, for one thing, it makes me feel good. I bet it makes you feel good too. When you start thinking about things that you are so happy that you have, or the people in your life that bring you joy, or the clients that you have, or maybe just being grateful that you get to get up in the morning and you know, kiss your spouse, or you get to play with your cats. I have cats, or your dog. But just to be so appreciative of whatever it is that you have. It can wipe away any bad mood that you have, because let’s face it, things happen in our lives that knock us off balance or certainly you know you pick up the phone and look go scroll through social media or go to your news website and you’re bound to look at something that could make your blood pressure rise. Well that’s no way to be folks.   Living Fully and Loving Deeply: The Connection to Gratitude I, we’ve been talking about here, we’ve been talking about for the last six years on this podcast about how to live fully, love deeply and engage authentically. And gratitude plays a role in all of that. If when you’re not grateful, for what you have. When you go around feeling miserable and complaining, and I know people like this. In fact, I was raised by someone like that, God rest her soul. My mom, she was a lovely lady in so many ways. She taught me, I mean, she taught me how to read when I was three years old for crying out loud. And she fostered in me a love of reading at an early age, because we used to go to the library, take out books all the time. She also fostered in me a good sense of justice and being able to, you know, to know right from wrong. And the importance of taking care of people who don’t have as much as we have.   Learning Gratitude and Compassion Early in Life I don’t know if I’ve talked about this before, but I remember one Halloween and maybe I was, I don’t know, seven or eight years old possibly. Maybe even a little bit older probably because You know i’d already spent several halloween’s going out and collecting candy you know saying trick-or-treat as we do here in the united states and you get candy well one year i remember that. I didn’t go trick-or-treating for candy. Instead, I went trick-or-treating for UNICEF, the organization that helps children all over the world, helping them to be able to have enough food and, I think, medical treatment and things like that. I don’t know exactly what their mission is, but I know that that’s what I did. I remember carrying some little probably a cardboard container or something and going to my neighbor’s houses and saying trick or treat for UNICEF. And I don’t remember feeling like that was a burden. I was happy to do it. And I think that’s, again, that’s what I’m grateful for is that my mom taught me that it’s important to think about others who are less fortunate than you are. I could always have, we have plenty to eat, and she could always get me candy some other time, so I could do this that time instead.   Breaking the Cycle of Complaining vs. Practicing Gratitude And I know I was starting to say that she did also like to complain. And I remember we would go out to eat at a restaurant and she would complain about her meal. And, and that happened frequently. And I think that because that just sort of became a habit that that’s, she always seemed to have something to complain about. So, all right. So, so yeah. So when you’re complaining, like I said, I love my mom, but this was a bad habit that she had of, instead of being grateful that we had money to be able to go out to eat to a restaurant, that she had a job that supported us, she would complain instead.   How Focus and Visualization Shape Your Reality And I do believe that being grateful for the things that we have in our lives just brings more to us. Because the converse is true. You know, what you focus on expands. And if you want to focus on having things to be grateful for, then be grateful for what you have now. And even express gratitude for things that you don’t have. Because you can get into visualizing and I’ve got, oh, okay. I’ve got cats in the background that were, one had been sitting on a chair for a very long time and the other cat decided, it’s my turn. So I’m grateful that I have cats that amuse me, even while I’m trying to record a podcast like this, but it’s okay. okay where am i going with this all right let’s focus focus sorry i’m letting the cats distract me i don’t know or maybe not you know um oh i know what i wanted to talk to you about about gratitude so This is gonna be a shorter podcast than normal.   Life Transitions and Reinvention: What’s Coming in 2026 I will tell you that right now because I am grateful that I’ve had the past six years to do this podcast. And I want to let you know that we’re going to be changing things up a little bit in 2026. So I’m, the podcast is going to get a new name and we’re just, just tweaking it a little bit, but I just wanted to just kind of plant that seed because it’s a new year and it’s, and I, as I said, I’ve been doing this for six years, which is a long time. And I actually, this podcast I started actually 10 years ago. And the original name of the podcast was Write, Sell, Succeed. And write is spelled W-R-I-T-E because I was doing copywriting at the time as my primary business and the intention of the podcast at that time was to use it to promote my online marketing services. And so I did that for probably about nine months or so. And then life got in the way as it does. And so that was when my sister was going through her cancer journey. And I decided to put the podcast on hold. And I didn’t pick it up again. So that was in 2016.   Building Community Through Authentic Connection Over Six Years I took a break, picked it back up again in December of 2019. And I’ve been here every week since and it’s been a joy and I’m so grateful that I’ve had this opportunity to speak to some amazing people. And in fact, in December, I’m going to treat you to a couple of Encore episodes, something I haven’t done in all of these six years of doing this podcast. I haven’t done Encore episodes, but I’m going to do that. I’m going to share with you again two of the most popular ones from this year. and I don’t remember the guests at the moment, but I will share those with you in December as I start getting ready to ramp up to do the new podcast, because we’re going to have, it’s going to have a new open and new introduction and some new graphics. So it’s going to look a little bit different but I’ll still be me and I’m still essentially going to be talking about the same things but I am going to I was going to ask some different questions of the guests that we have on in fact for one thing I was working on that today actually I was it was like coming up with some new questions to ask because I want to I want to be fresh. I want to create something new.   Gratitude Affirmations: Visualizing Success Before It Happens And I think that’s part of gratitude as well, is being able to be grateful for what you have planned. And again, that’s what I was starting to talk to you about a little bit ago, too, about visualization and being grateful and sort of imagining what you want to have happen and you can be grateful and just even use affirmations and say I’m so grateful that this has happened as if it already has happened even if it hasn’t. boy, I bet I confused you right now. Let me, let me give an example. Because I, I, I’ve done this and I do this.   Creating Vision and Goals: Planning a Grief Retreat for Women So you could say, let’s say, so today is, you know, we’re in November. So you could say, let’s say you want to achieve a goal by June of next year. And actually, you know what, I do have a goal. in fact I’m going to even going to mention that here now too, is that I am going to be co-facilitating a retreat, a grief retreat in June of 2026. So what I could do as an affirmation that also includes this bit of gratitude is that I could say I am so happy and grateful that it is June 25th and we have a sold-out retreat. I am so grateful that we’ve got 15 amazing women that have come with us to Black Mountain, North Carolina to take part in our Good Grief Retreat. I am so grateful because I will tell you that this really does work. That type of visualizing, using an affirmation, and then being grateful, even though it hasn’t happened yet, but just imagining that it already has and being grateful for it.   Manifesting Your Dreams Through Gratitude Practice Because the last time I actually, I did a solo retreat, I did my Unplugged to Recharge retreat a couple of years ago. I did this is every morning I would spend some time visualizing the end of the retreat actually and how I felt leaving. That’s what I’m probably going to do for the Good Grief Retreat too. I think I’m going to do that. Because I would just, I would picture myself driving in my car, driving back home from the retreat and just feeling so wonderful that everyone got so much value out of the retreat. And I was so, and I just filled myself with such gratitude. And when the retreat happened and I was driving home that day, it dawned on me that, oh my gosh, This was exactly what I visualized as I visualized myself driving down the freeway, just feeling so happy that the retreat was a success. So I’m gonna do that again and I’m going to encourage, I have co-facilitators, I’m not doing this retreat alone, I’ve got three other wonderful women who are gonna be also working with me on that retreat and I’m gonna encourage them to do that too.   Building Partnerships and Collaboration in Women’s Networking To visualize it so that we have 15 amazing People, probably women, but men, I don’t think we’re gonna turn away men either, but probably women. Anyway, to come to this retreat. So I will be talking more about this at another time and I’ll give you links and all that good information when we start officially marketing, but you heard it here first. So it’s coming, so mark your calendar now. It’s June 25th to the 29th. It’s a Thursday through a Monday. And we’re going to be at the Lodge at the Light Center in Black Mountain, North Carolina. It’s a beautiful place. In fact, I saw before I started recording the podcast today that Patricia, one of the other leaders of the retreat, sent me some pictures. She sent me a picture of the Lodge. So she’s actually in Asheville right now with her daughter. So they decided to go and take a look at the place so in person so that we could see it Because she like me lives in Florida So, okay, let me see anything else I want to say about the importance of gratitude yeah, so it’s you know, it’s it’s been proven to really improve your Mental health your physical health being grateful and   The Science Behind Gratitude: Better Health and Rewiring Your Brain And I just remembered, yeah, I had a whole bunch of notes about this because I have a wonderful organization networking group called the Soulful Women’s Network. And we were gonna be meeting this week, but we had to wind up canceling it. But I had a whole bunch of notes. I just remembered that, because we were gonna talk about gratitude. So I’m gonna see if I can find any of my notes about it. Ah, yes, so I did want to, here, you know what, I’m gonna go ahead and share it with you today because, yeah. Like I said, it is good for your health.   Research-Backed Benefits: Gratitude Letters and Mental Health There’s been studies that have shown that people who wrote gratitude letters regularly displayed significantly better mental health than those who didn’t. And in fact, brain scans suggest that gratitude might even have the power to rewire our brains for the better. Well, that makes perfect sense to me. And so you get better sleep and immunity, maybe even possibly reduce pain. I would think so too, because if you’re feeling grateful, I think that it just really does. I think it raises those endorphins in your body, you know, those good hormones. Um, it’s also good for building stronger social bonds and building resilience and there’s a couple different ways that you can build gratitude.   Simple Gratitude Practices You Can Start Tonight I mean, for one thing, just treat yourself with kindness and do some sort of gratitude practice. I mean, I will do, before I go to bed at night, I write, I have a journal that I write in and I will go write in that journal several things, like at least three things that I was grateful about that happened during the day. And it could be something as simple as, I found a penny on the street today. I am so grateful that I found a penny today. Because hey, you know, even though I guess the United States is going to be phasing out the pennies, there’s still legal tender, and I’m going to celebrate finding one. Because it’s one cent more today than I had yesterday. That’s abundance. That’s prosperity. And who doesn’t want more of that?   Connecting to Your Higher Power Through Daily Gratitude I also, one of the things that as we just allow ourselves to feel gratitude, there’s a quote here from unity minister, Eric Butterworth, who said that, the flow of intelligence and love and peace and power come through us and manifest as us effectively. And he said, the practice of gratitude gets us into a full of greatness consciousness. That’s a pretty good reason to be grateful. And I think that’s what it is. I think being grateful really does connect us with our higher power. It just strengthens that connection. And yeah, it’s a wonderful, it’s really a really wonderful thing.   Expressing Appreciation: Writing Gratitude Letters That Heal So I encourage you, to find ways that you can be grateful. Do I want to say it that way? That’s not quite what I want to say. How do I want to say it? Find things that you can be grateful for every day and appreciate them and maybe make a list of people that you’re grateful for. Maybe even write them a letter And you can also write a letter to people who aren’t around anymore. Maybe someone who is no longer in your life, either maybe you’re just not friends with them anymore or something happened, or maybe they’re physically not in this world anymore. Their body, you know, they have passed on.   Forgiveness Practice and Healing Through Written Gratitude But you could still write them a letter and just say how grateful you are that they were in your life. Because I’ve been taught, and I’ve done this, that sometimes it’s a good idea to write letters to people who treated you badly, or who pissed you off. And that’s a good way to be able to get all those emotions out, and you can then just release that anger. And it’s a good part of a forgiveness practice. You don’t necessarily mail this letter to them, but it’s just really for you. But I think it would also be a good practice to write a letter to someone about what a positive difference they made in your life and all the wonderful things that they’ve done for you. And then you could, again, if they’re here in the flesh, you might wanna even just mail it to them.   Paying Gratitude Forward: Creating Ripple Effects of Appreciation In fact, just out of the blue, send it to them. That would brighten their day, I tell you. I know, I’ve received letters in the past sometimes from people who thanked me for something, and it just makes you feel so good. And you know what’s also good about that? Is when you do that, you know, you’re feeling good, you’re feeling grateful. And so about this person and what they did. And so you send them that message and now they’re gonna feel grateful for receiving this and knowing that they feel appreciated. And then they’re probably gonna wanna then pass that on to someone else. It’s not a great, talk about pass it, paying it forward. Paying gratitude forward. be a wonderful thing to do.   Honoring Spiritual Connection: Writing to Those Who’ve Passed And as I said, you can also write this letter to someone who’s not here anymore, because I believe even though there may not be physically here, their spirit still lives on. And I’m sure they would appreciate hearing from you anyway, even if they’re not here to actually physically read that letter, they’re gonna feel your vibe. And I think it’s gonna really pay off for you, again, making you feel good. And who knows what good will come of that. So I encourage you to do that today.   Letting Go: Releasing What No Longer Serves You And also release stuff that doesn’t serve you anymore. I’m actually gonna spend some time doing that. I had a thought this morning that I’ve been holding on to some old letters and things that I don’t think my kids really care about. And it’s old stuff that I don’t really need to hold on to anymore either. Just that’s a thought too.   Join the Awakening Your Inner Light Workshop So I also wanted to, before we close out the podcast today, is I wanted to do, we’re gonna do two things. The first thing is I wanna share with you about an upcoming online workshop that I have. It’s just a 90-minute workshop, and it’s called Awakening Your Inner Light. And during this workshop, I am going to be essentially teaching you the love method, what I call my love method, which stands for let go and let God open your heart to receive, value your uniqueness and embrace your divinity.   Experiential Learning: The L.O.V.E. Method for Personal Growth And so we’re going to do, we’re going to do some experiential exercises to really bring home how these concepts can really help you to, again, live fully and love deeply and engage authentically, but most of all, to love yourself, to really be comfortable with who you are. And so I encourage you, it’s gonna be on Thursday, November 20th, 2025. That’s at 1 p.m. Eastern time. So you can go to bit.ly forward slash inner light, L-I-G-H-T 2025, and you can register. I’ll have it in the show notes as well. But I would love to see you there. Because, yeah, I did this workshop in person a few weeks ago. And it was just really wonderful. And everyone participated. And we did some exercises. We paired up. We journaled. And it was just really, really, really powerful. And I figured I want to do it online as well.   Creating Transformational Experiences for Women Over 50 So that’s my plan. So again go to bit.ly forward slash interlite 2025 and you can get all the information there. We’re doing it on Zoom and you can you can sign up and register for that. And I encourage you to do that and show up because I’m not going to record it because it’s not really something that you can go back to and do. I might record just the teaching part of it, but not the exercises. Hmm, yeah, actually, now that I think about it, maybe that’s what I’ll do. I’ll record the teaching part, but not the exercises, because they’ll be in breakout rooms, so.   Subscribe and Stay Connected Through the Transition Okay, one last thing before we go today. Oh, and I also wanna encourage you to subscribe to Live, Love, Engage, even though I know the name is gonna be changing, but still, I encourage you to subscribe, because that way you will be notified when the change comes through. And then you can still decide then, okay, well, maybe it’s not for me or maybe it is. We’ll see.   Light Language Message: Speaking to the Soul But anyway, um, as I like to do when I do these solo episodes is I’d love to be able to share a light language message with you. And light message is, it’s an inter interdimensional, uh, form of communication. I, never quite know what it’s going to sound like when it comes through. Sometimes I speak, sometimes I sing, but it’s a language that speaks to the heart. Your heart can feel it and your soul can resonate with it even though you may not be able to translate it necessarily. Maybe you will, maybe you won’t, but I encourage you to have an open mind and an open heart, and allow what comes through to be for your soul’s highest good and, and, and fill you with gratitude.   Creating Space for Spiritual Connection and Energy Healing So if you are listening to this podcast right now, while you are driving, I would encourage you to pause this and come back and listen to it sometime when you can be in a quiet room. And you can just be still close your eyes and listen to it. So So that’s what I’m going to do is I’m setting the intention that the message that I share will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concern. [Light Language Message] Okay I hope you received that with the love that it was intended and I’m so grateful that I have been blessed with the ability to do this and that I get to share it with you and I intend in 2026 to figure out a way to be able to have these messages go out on a platforms too because it’s it’s good stuff and I want more people to hear it so I have to I have to work on that.   Closing with Gratitude: An Invitation to Share and Connect One thing at a time you know I’m grateful again I’m grateful for you I’m grateful I have this opportunity to be with you each week and I yeah I’m just I’m just so grateful for everyone who listens to this podcast and I’m yeah, I’m just grateful. There we go. I’m just grateful. And I encourage you to go out and be grateful as well.   Support the Show: Leave a Review and Share Your Thoughts And one way that you could be grateful, that you can express your gratitude, I should say for the podcast is to actually leave a review on Apple. That would be really amazing. And if you happen to watch this on YouTube, leave me a comment on the YouTube channel as well on this particular video. So that would be wonderful, and I would be very grateful for that. So until next time, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.  

What if approaching the year-end for your business wasn’t about goals or grind this time around, but grace? In this solo episode, I invite you to pause before the holidays and honor the year that’s been. Not through metrics or resolutions, but through meaning. Drawing from my L.O.V.E. Method™ (Let Go and Let God, Open Your Heart to Receive, Value Your Uniqueness, and Embrace Your Divinity), I share five powerful year-end rituals to help you release, reflect, and realign with your higher self. Show Notes | Transcript Through stories of self-doubt, surrender, and quiet revelation, including a deeply personal reflection from my son’s wedding, you’ll be reminded that alignment isn’t strategy, it’s surrender. You’ll discover: How to turn reflection into a sacred, soul-soothing ritual. Why “letting go” clears the way for true prosperity. Five practical rituals to complete your year with love and intention. If you’re ready to lay down the weight of what didn’t happen, and remember that you are already enough, this episode is your permission slip to rest, release, and reconnect with what matters most. Resources: Register for the Awakening Your Inner Light Workshop: bit.ly/innerlight2025 Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Year-End Rituals for the Soul – Not the Spreadsheet A Reflective Conversation on Letting Go, Renewal, and Self-Love ️ Finding Peace Before the Holidays Namaste. If you found your way to this podcast today because you needed a few minutes of peace before the holidays swallow you whole, I’m so glad you did. Today we’re going to be talking about year-end rituals—not the kind that involve complicated spreadsheets or aggressive goal setting that give you knots in your stomach. There’s plenty of time for that. No, today we’re talking about the kind of ritual that soothes your soul. The kind that whispers, “You did it. You’re still here. And that matters.” So let’s take a breath together, shall we? And let me officially welcome you to Live Love Engage. Especially if it’s your first time, I am Gloria Grace, confidence catalyst and self-love advocate. I empower mission-driven women over 50 through my signature L.O.V.E. Method and energy healing to boldly live life on their terms. A Personal Story of Self-Doubt and Alignment How One Moment at a Wedding Sparked a Lesson in Self-Worth Before we dive into year-end reflection, I want to tell you a story. A couple of weeks ago, I went on a two-day road trip from Florida to Virginia with my husband and daughter to attend our son’s wedding. It was the most time I’d spent with my husband since we separated three years ago—a deeply enlightening experience that brought up a lot of old, disempowering patterns of thinking. Hours before the ceremony, a makeup artist worked her magic. I looked in the mirror… and heard that old, stupid voice whisper: “Who do you think you are to feel beautiful?” For a moment, I almost let that voice steal my joy. That’s how sneaky self-doubt can be—it shows up right when life invites you to shine. But love called me back—in my son’s embrace, my daughter’s smile. Their presence pulled me out of my head and back into my heart. That’s when I remembered: Alignment isn’t another strategy. It’s a surrender. When you shift from fear to trust, everything you’ve been chasing begins to meet you halfway. Setting Down the Weight of the Year A Guided Reflection for Women in Transition Before we do any year-end reflection, can we just set down whatever weight you’re carrying? Maybe it’s shame about what didn’t happen this year. Or guilt about the clients you didn’t sign. The content you didn’t create. The version of yourself you thought you’d be by now. Put it down. Right here between us. I’ll hold it with you for a moment—and then we’ll leave it there. Let’s breathe again. And now, answer from your heart, not your head: What if nothing went wrong this year? What if every pivot was actually a course correction from your higher self? What if the exhaustion was your body whispering, “Something needs to change”? ✨ Reflecting Through the L.O.V.E. Method Spiritual Business Rituals for Year-End Clarity Let’s move through these reflections using the L.O.V.E. Method: L — Let Go and Let God What were you trying to control this year that the universe was already handling? O — Open Your Heart to Receive What came to you when you stopped chasing? Where did support show up that you almost missed? V — Value Your Uniqueness What made you different that you tried to ignore this year? Where did you compare yourself into paralysis? E — Embrace Your Divinity When did you feel most aligned, even if you were tired? What reminded you that you are love—not just doing loving things, but being love? Take time later to journal your answers. Because this—not your follower count or revenue—is what your year was truly about. Ritual 1: The Bonfire Letter Releasing What No Longer Serves You Write a letter to the year you’ve just lived. Thank it for the lessons—yes, even the painful ones. Start with honesty: “I’m angry this launch didn’t work.” “I’m frustrated that things didn’t turn out the way I hoped.” Then shift: “Thank you for teaching me patience. Thank you for showing me what needs to change.” Burn it safely in a fireproof container—or shred it. Let those ashes symbolize transmutation. This is your way of letting go and letting God. Ritual 2: The Completion Conversation Creating Authentic Connection with Your Business Have a heart-to-heart with your business. Ask: What did you need from me this year that you didn’t get? What did I give you that nourished us both? Treat your business as a sacred partner—because it is. Ritual 3: The Sanctuary Day Reconnecting with Your Inner Wisdom Pick a day before the year ends. No strategy. No planning. No content creation. Just be with yourself. Turn off your phone. Don’t journal. Don’t produce. Think of it as a mini spiritual retreat. Be still. Listen. Because your higher self already knows what your next step is. Ritual 4: The Soul Review Reflecting on Growth and Integrity Ask yourself three questions: When did I feel most alive this year? When did I betray myself—and what can I learn from that? What does my future self want me to know? These questions are not about fixing—they’re about remembering. ️ Ritual 5: The Permission Slip Jar Giving Yourself Grace in Midlife Reinvention Find a small jar. Write three notes and place them inside: I give myself permission to rest without guilt. I give myself permission to pivot midstream. I give myself permission to not have it all figured out. Keep this jar on your desk. Let it remind you that you are enough, even in the becoming. December Doesn’t Owe You Clarity Slowing Down to Receive Spiritual Guidance December doesn’t owe you a perfect plan. It offers rest. Integration. Space between the exhale and inhale. You don’t need to be new on January 1st. You just need to be more you. Ask yourself: Who do I want to become? How do I want to feel? What do I want to be known for—not by others, but by my own soul? Embracing Prosperity and Purpose Choosing a Word of Intention for the New Year Instead of resolutions, choose a word of intention—a feeling word. Something like Spacious. Courageous. Prosperous. For me, it’s Prosperity—in love, friendship, health, and purpose. Light Language Transmission A Sacred Closing Ritual for Healing and Alignment I always close my solo episodes with a Light Language message. Light Language is an energetic communication that speaks to your soul. You may not understand it with your brain—but your heart will. So if you’re driving, pause. Find a quiet space. Close your eyes. Set the intention: “May this message serve my soul’s highest good.” Then receive: Kama Shaka Shak… Let it wash over you. Closing Reflection Living Fully, Loving Deeply, Engaging Authentically Thank you for being here—for trusting yourself enough to listen to the voice that says: You are enough. You are love. You are exactly where you need to be. Until next time, be gentle with yourself. You’re doing better than you think. Go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

What if you created space for a spiritual awakening during the holidays by giving yourself permission to fall apart, instead of holding it together? In this raw and restorative episode, I give you permission to fall apart, rest, and release what no longer serves you. Through my stories of loss, reflection, and divine renewal, you’ll discover how unraveling can spark rebirth and lasting peace. This episode is for every woman, especially those over 50, who feels the weight of being “the strong one,” through the holidays. You’ll discover how burnout can become a breakthrough, and why your tears, pauses, and quiet moments might be the holiest thing you offer yourself this season. Show Notes | Transcript What you’ll learn: How to turn holiday burnout into sacred awareness. Why rest is not weakness, but wisdom. How grief, stillness, and surrender lead to midlife reinvention. Steps toward living intentionally after 50 and reclaiming joy on your own terms. The spiritual link between burnout recovery and authentic fulfillment. Reflection Questions 1. What expectations am I ready to release this holiday season? 2. Where is my soul asking for rest or simplicity? 3. How might redefining success help me experience deeper peace? Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Schedule your light language session: tidycal.com/gloria3/single-light-language-session Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Permission to Fall Apart: Spiritual Awakening Through the Holidays Opening: The December Business Burnout Cycle Namaste. Am I the only one who wants to throw it all away every December? Now, I don’t mean cleaning out the junk so the house is clean for the holidays. I’m actually talking about scrapping the business and walking away. You see, this week’s episode is supposed to be about managing seasonal triggers like they’re items on a to do list. You know, check your boundaries, practice self care, set realistic expectations. But here’s what I really want to say. What if the trigger is the business itself? What if every December you remember who you were before you became this entrepreneur version of yourself and you’re not quite sure you’d like the trade you made? That’s what we’re really talking about. So not we’re not going to be sharing tips or strategies, but the raw nerve underneath all of it. But as always, first, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. Especially if this is your first time joining us. I really want to welcome you and introduce myself. I am Gloria Grace. I’m a confidence catalyst and self love advocate. And I empower the mission driven women over 50 through my signature love method, L-O-V-E method and energy healing to boldly live life on their terms. Now, I just realized I forgot my water today, but I’m just going to keep on rolling because that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to. I’m going to do this episode without water. So. So there you go. The Reality of Running a Business as a Woman Over 50 And see, that’s what I think. This is what it is. I mean, this is what December feels like when you’re a woman over 50 running a business. While, I don’t know, it seems like the whole world is ending around you. Or maybe it’s just your world or somebody else’s world just ended. Or maybe you’re watching everything you’ve built feel suddenly pointless. The Rage: When Everyone Else Checks Out But You’re Still Showing Up You know, there you might be feeling a lot of rage, you know, that everyone else gets to check out for the holidays, but you’re still showing up, still performing, still holding space for other people’s transformations while yours is on hold. Maybe you’re feeling some rage as your family still doesn’t understand what you do, that you spent 30 years becoming someone else’s definition of successful. Now you’re finally doing your thing and it’s frankly exhausting and lonely and nobody’s throwing you a parade, for crying out loud. The Shame: The Hidden Feelings Entrepreneurs Don’t Talk About Maybe there’s some shame, you know, for not wanting to decorate, for resenting the clients who ghost you in December or for looking at your revenue and feeling that old familiar pit in the pit of your stomach, you know, am I worth anything if I’m not producing? Maybe it’s for being spiritual but wanting to really just, I don’t know, hit the next person who tells you to just surrender and trust, even if that’s your higher self. Because I tell you, that’s the message I’ve been getting for the last, I don’t know, two years now. Ah, I know, I know, I know. I need to do that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Futility: When Your Business Feels Pointless Maybe it’s that futility of sending another email or creating another offer or showing up on another zoom call when your, I don’t know, mother, sister, best friend, marriage, body is falling apart. And then there’s this voice that’s whispering to you, what is the point? Who cares? Why am I doing this? The Truth We Can’t Say Out Loud in Our Businesses And underneath all of it, the thing we absolutely cannot say in our businesses where we’re supposed to be healed and empowered, is this. What if I don’t want to keep going now? Not in a scary way, but just what if the version of success I’ve been chasing feels like a cage I built myself? What if I’m tired? What if I need to stop? But stopping feels like failure and I’ve already failed and at so many things. And this was supposed to be the thing. Getting emotional here. Oh, gosh. My Sister’s Story: Running a Business While Grieving Yeah, I’m getting emotional because I’m thinking about, let’s see, nine years ago. Okay, so I’m recording this in November. Well, actually, it’s still the end of October. Wait a minute. It’s still the end of October. This is going to be airing the beginning of November. The Phone Call That Changed Everything But nine years ago at this time, I was in Tucson, Arizona. I was at a hospital where my sister was dealing with complications from the cancer that she’d been battling for the last year and a half almost. And I had rushed out there in October, at the end of October, because I’d gotten this call from the nurse saying that your sister’s. We’re not sure she’s going to make it. You need to come out here right now. So I hopped out of a plane. Thank God for Southwest Airlines at the time. They were really great and got me on a plane right away. And I even got TSA pre check, so I didn’t even have to stand through the line, which was wonderful. And luckily she rallied. My sister did rally, but she also, you know, we just knew. It was like, you know, this is it. You know, the end is coming. And she’d already stopped Chemo going through any more radiation therapy just wasn’t going to do anything anymore for her, for the tumor that she had. And so we opted to go get her into hospice care. And so she was in, in a, in a hospice facility for a little while. And then on November 11, I remember that it was Veterans Day, she went home. Balancing Business and Being Present During Grief They, the hospice people brought a bed to her home, which we set up in the living room. And that’s where she stayed until the end of December. A couple days after Christmas was when she transitioned. And all the while that this was going on, you know, I’m running a business, I’m trying to run a business. Anyway, I mean, thankfully the fact that I’m a solopreneur and that I was doing digital marketing really at the time, as long as I had computer connection, I was able to do that. And I was also in the middle of, and I remember like recording videos while she was sleeping. You know, I would go out in the backyard and record a video because I was promoting a three day workshop that I had already postponed once due to a hurricane. And now it was going to happen in January. And like at the end of January was when the hotel was able to, to be open again. And so I was promoting this workshop, trying to keep the, keep things together, you know, keeping the word out all the while. My sister is starting to fade and man, oh man, let me tell you, the tension, you know, between grief and then, especially then the grief of losing her and then having to put this workshop on a month later. How Grief Changed My Business Forever Wow. It was, you know, it was not easy. You know, I, ah, I, you know, and I’m like, I’m looking at my notes right now and I’m not even sure what I want to say. But it just, you know, it was just realizing that trying to do all of this, it’s just, it’s just, it sucks. And, and I gotta tell you is that, you know, every year when, you know, the holidays come around, you know, I’m reminded of, of that time, you know, and, and just, yeah, just trying to do this. So, so I guess maybe this is the real holiday trigger that I’m trying to, trying to talk about today. It’s not the past trauma, but it’s, it’s that present day realization that you’ve become someone who can function and you’re not really sure that’s a superpower or prison. What Do We Do With This? Permission to Fall Apart So what do we do with this? Because I can’t just leave you in the pit with me. Even though part of me thinks there’s something honest about staying here together for a minute. But first, and I mean this, stop trying to holiday proof your business like it’s a house you’re weatherizing. Your business is you. And if you’re falling apart, it gets to fall apart, too. Because I tell you, after my sister passed, I. I wasn’t blogging regularly anymore. I, I, you know, I, I used to blog every week. I didn’t do that. I think I was lucky to maybe do a blog article once a month in that first year. I stopped sending out regular emails because I had to deal with the grief. When Your Business Model Reveals the Truth So maybe December is actually showing you the truth about your business model. Maybe that it’s too fragile, too dependent on your constant output, too shaped around other people’s needs. So what if the trigger is a message, not a malfunction? Questions to Ask Yourself This Holiday Season So here’s some questions I’m sitting with. Maybe. Maybe you are, too. What would my business look like if I built it for the woman I’m becoming, not the woman I was when I started? Let’s just pause on that a little bit. In fact, I might even just re. Re. Ask that. Yeah, what if? What if. What would my business look like? Actually, yeah, what would my business look like if I built it for the woman I’m becoming, not the woman I was when I started? Which parts of my business am I keeping because they work? And which parts am I keeping because I’m scared to admit they don’t? What if success isn’t scaling? What if it’s right sizing? What if enough is actually enough? The Healer Who Needs Healing Here’s another question. Am I trying to heal people? Because that’s my gift. Now, I know not all of you may be necessarily healers per se, but maybe depending on what type of business you’re in, maybe because there’s other ways of healing. But anyway, maybe it’s because being the healer means I don’t have to be the one who breaks. I hope this is making sense. I hope it is. That’s what I want to say. Seasonal triggers aren’t just about family dysfunction. Although there is that. Holiday Triggers Beyond Family Drama And I might even do a little side talk about this in a second, too, you know? You know, maybe it’s, you know, maybe it’s not about, you know, your parent, your mom, maybe who still introduces you by your corporate job from 15 years ago, or your brother or sister who asks when you’re getting a real job. Or maybe it’s even a spouse who asks that as well. Maybe it’s your partner also, who doesn’t get why you’re stressed about A business that should be passive by now. The Deeper Trigger: Proximity to Who You Used to Be But maybe the deeper trigger is this. The holidays force you to exist in close proximity to the life you used to have, the person you used to be, and everyone’s opinion about whether you made the right choice. And part of you still isn’t sure, you know, wondering, you know, should you have stayed in the marriage, kept the job, made everyone else comfortable? Special Events Can Trigger Us Too: My Son’s Wedding Story And, you know, and I’m. I’m gonna. Again, I had a bunch of notes, and I’m. I’m just gonna digress here for a second, too, because foreign. It’s not just even the holidays that bring this stuff up. Sometimes it’s even special events, wonderful special events that you might experience. You know, you may have noticed, if you have been a regular subscriber of the podcast, that over the last four weeks, I didn’t do anything episodes, they were all interviews. I. It was four straight weeks of interviews, and that’s because I was getting ready for my son’s wedding. My son got married this past weekend, and it was a wonderful, wonderful occasion and a bit of a stressful one as well, because I was in prox. Proximity, yes, very close proximity, with my husband, who I’ve been separated from for the last three years. Navigating Old Patterns and New Boundaries And we wound up driving together. Thankfully, my daughter was with us, so I had a little bit of a buffer there. But it was amazing in that it really brought up a lot of stuff for me, a lot of emotion and even backsliding into some patterns that I thought I had dealt with. So, yeah, it’s. It was a wonderful experience, and it was also an emotional one and really, you know, kind of brought up some triggers in me. So, like I said, it’s not. It’s not always just the holidays itself, but maybe it was the holidays and. And this. But anyway, okay, here’s what I want to tell you as we’re nearing the end of the year. As you know, we’re getting. This is, you know, November now, and this is airing, and December is right around the corner. Give Yourself Permission to Not Have It All Together Stop thinking that you have to have it all together just for December. Now, maybe, you know, you could still be active in November. You know, we got Black Friday coming up. Maybe you got it. You’re gonna run a special for Black Friday, you know, or Small Business Saturday and all. All that fun stuff, you know, but once that’s. Be good to yourself. Be honest with yourself. Let the Right People Know You’re Struggling Let people know that you’re struggling, you know, supportive people. Okay. Make sure it is supportive people. Let your business be quiet. Give yourself. If I can speak. Give Yourself permission not to, to launch, not to post as much. Let yourself take a holiday break. You don’t have to do everything. Sitting with the Fear That Comes When You Stop Performing Let yourself feel some fear that comes up when you’re not performing because it probably will, you’ll probably be like, ah, I should be, I need to be doing stuff, you know, know, but maybe don’t, you know, if that voice comes up, you know, and we have these lovely voices that say, oh, you know, if you stop, you’re going to lose everything. If you’re not producing, you’re not valuable. If you don’t show up consistently, they’re going to forget about you. Your Real People Will Notice When You’re Gone Maybe, maybe some will. But you know what? They weren’t your ideal client. Because if they are your ideal client and they notice. In fact, I even saw somebody today, someone that I follow. He’s even been a guest on the show before. His name is Mark Mawhinney. He’s, he is a believer in sending daily emails. I mean, this man is consistent. But he had one time where he had one day where his email software didn’t work and his daily email did not show up in people’s inboxboxes at the same time. It was delayed. And he got emails from people saying, what happened? Are you okay? Did you have a car accident? What’s going on? Your Ideal Clients Will Check In On You And he heard from those people because they were the people who really, really followed him and really were his ideal clients, were his ideal followers. They were invested in him. So even if you don’t show up consistently in December, the people who really are your people, they will be curious and they, they may just react, reach out to you and say, hey, is everything okay? And then you can say, yeah, I’m just taking a little break for the holidays. How about you? Why don’t you take a break too? Let’s take a break together and let’s enjoy ourselves for a change. And then we’ll come back rare to go in January. Ego Voice vs. Higher Self: Knowing the Difference So that ego voice that was saying all these things to you, you know, that’s the seasonal trigger. It’s not your intuition, it’s not your higher self that loves you. It’s those messages that we absorb from, you know, from our culture, from our well meaning parents, from our well meaning friends, from, you know, religion, whatever, you know, that you’re not good enough or whatever. When you be still and know you’re going to hear the difference because your higher self loves you and cares for you and is going to tell you, yeah, it’s okay to take a break. It’s okay or not, you know, if, if maybe you want to just keep powering on in December? I mean, I’m actually thinking of doing some stuff. I’m going to be December and I’m going to start talking about this more as I get through into. We start getting into December, but the podcast is going to be going through a rebranding in January and I’ll be talking more about this, but I’m just planting the seed now. My Plans for Taking a Break While Still Moving Forward Not a major change, but the name is going to change, the podcast name is going to change. The, the. I’ve already been sort of letting you know who I’m talking to and hopefully you’re responding. But I, but I really want everything to be more consistent and when we, when it happens in January. So anyway, so I’m going to be still fairly active, but I did enjoy the break last week, which was nice. I didn’t even post anything. Well, I had my, I scheduled a post for LinkedIn, but it was like pretty much I was dark on social media last week. So that was sort of my holiday break for the wedding because I wanted to be able to be there for my, for my kids and enjoy spending time with them. And I have this wonderful new daughter in law. I’ve got a, you know, wonderful son and daughter. And so now I’ve got a three kids in my family now instead of two, which is wonderful. Powerful Questions for Your End-of-Year Reflection So, so here’s the deal. What I want you to ponder right now is think about. I’m going to, I’m going to pose some more questions for you. So, and these are things that you might want to go back and listen to this again and maybe journal about, you know, because I’m a big fan of journaling. I love doing that. So start thinking about what if you don’t want what you originally said you wanted? You know, think about that. What if maybe the dream you’re chasing is someone else’s? Are You Building to Prove Something? What if you’re building this business to prove something to people who don’t even care? Or worse than maybe they’re not even around anymore or they’re not watching. And what if you’re simply done with this version of your business, this iteration of yourself, this relentless pushing. Permission to Want Less, Smaller, Quieter What if you want less, smaller, quieter? What if you want to matter less to more people and matter more to fewer people? These are the questions that the holidays surface because they make us stop, really force us to stop. And when we stop, we can feel everything that we’ve been running from. And maybe the most radical thing you can do this December isn’t to holiday proof anything. Maybe it’s the holiday break. You open so you can see what’s actually underneath. Sitting in the Rubble Without Fixing It And then what if you didn’t fix it? What if you didn’t pivot, Realign, rebrand. Okay, don’t listen to me. You know, I know I’m rebranding, but, you know, it’s just the podcast a little bit. But what if you just sat in the rubble for your. For a minute and let yourself be okay? And again, I’m not saying to blow up your business. I’m not. What I am saying is to stop pretending that it’s separate from your healing. Your Business Is Part of Your Journey, Not the Solution Stop treating it like a thing you fix so you can be whole. Your business isn’t the solution. It’s part of the journey. And right now, that journey might be asking you to slow down or stop entirely. You’re allowed. You’re allowed to be tired. You know, it’s. You know, and it might not even be your business. It might just be this energy that we’ve been living in for the past year, because especially here in the United States, let me tell you, it’s been. There’s been a lot of. A lot of stuff. I. I don’t want to even say negative, but I would just say there’s just been a lot of energy that’s might be weighing on you and that you need. You need a break from. And I know I’ve talked about this in the past in one of our episodes about, you know, kind of tuning out from social media so, you know, it’s okay to be tired, to want less, to even quit. The thing you said you’d never quit, to change your mind, to disappoint people. “I Don’t Know, and That’s All Right” Yeah. You know what? Or to not know. There’s a song I’ve been listening to. It’s on an album by Bob Sima, and it says I don’t know. And that’s all right. I don’t know, and that’s all right. So you. It’s all right for you not to know what to do right now? It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. The Power of Getting Quiet and Journaling Spend some time getting quiet. Because when you give yourself time to be quiet, ideas will come, answers will come, and, you know, or. Or journal, and the answers will come that way. So, yeah, I think I. I know I talked a mile a minute at the beginning, and I guess I was just revved up for some reason. So now I want to slow down. I’m going to slow down right now, and I want to offer you something to listen to. Light Language Healing Session: Let Go and Receive I’m going to share some light language with you and if you’re new to the podcast, if you’re new to Light Language, I’ll just, I’ll just tell you a little bit about it. But basically, number one, I’m going to encourage you to, if you’re driving, to save this for later because you’re going to want to listen to this where you can be totally focused on what you’re going to hear. Because I’d also encourage you to close your eyes as well and maybe put a hand on your heart, one on your belly or one or the other and just allow what I’m going to be sharing with you to speak to your heart because, because it’s going to sound like a foreign language and that’s okay because it is a, it’s a language of love that I channel from other realms and it will help you to release whatever you’re holding on to that you don’t want to, you don’t want to hold on to anymore. And so I’m, it’s going to give you permission to just let go whatever, whatever isn’t serving you anymore. And, and also to allow this season to crack you open instead of keeping it together a little bit so you don’t have to understand it, just receive it, let it move through you however it needs to. Setting Your Intention for Healing And so, yeah, so I’m going to trust right now that you pause this and that you’re ready to listen to it and just set an intention that the message that you receive will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concern, because that’s what I am intending as well. Sa shakana la madonna krivana. One-on-One Light Language Sessions: Personal Healing Support I hope you received that with the love that I intended for you to receive. And if you would ever like to receive Light Language directly from me one on one via Zoom, unless you happen to live in Florida and, and you know, know want to look me up in person. But, but I do one on one sessions online via Zoom and it’s really powerful because we can address specifically whatever issues you are going through right now. So whether it is, you know, dealing with this holiday angst or, or what have you, you know, you can get in touch with me, you can go to and schedule a half an hour session with me and you will get a recording of it so that you can listen to it over and over again. And yeah, I’d love to, I’d love to support you with that. You can go to, go to my website, go to gloriarand.com you’ll see under work with me I think is the tab under there or just go to. I’ll have the link in the show notes but go to bitly forward slash capital L, capital L, capital E and then lowercase podcast and the number three zero because it’s a 30 minute session. So LLE podcast 30. And yeah, I’d love to be able to support you with that. So one final thought I want to leave with you. You Are Light, You Are Love, and That’s Enough Is that you, you are here. You are you, you are light, you are love. And that’s enough. That’s enough for today. So I not sure what we’re talking about next week because normally at this time I would plug an interview. But no, I will be back next week with another episode and probably some more end of year stuff as we’re rocking and rolling here rapidly. What’s Coming in 2026: Podcast Rebranding Announcement I know once, once we hit October, it just seems like, I mean 2025 has flown by. I don’t know if that for you, but I know it has flown by for me. And now I know that these next eight weeks are, they’re going to be like over in a blink of an eye, I tell you. So before that happens, I want to encourage you to subscribe to the podcast. If you aren’t already subscribe on your favorite podcast platform, subscribe on YouTube as well. And this way you’ll be notified when our episodes drop. So yeah, that’s going to do it. That’s going to do it for this time. So until we meet again next week, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.  

If you’ve ever wondered how to grow your spiritual business without sacrificing your soul or burning yourself out, this conversation will feel like a breath of fresh air. In this episode, I sit down with Shilpa Lewis, AI strategist and host of the Omni Mindfulness podcast, to talk about how we can align our purpose with technology to amplify our message authentically. We dive deep into practical ways to use AI tools that enhance rather than replace your authentic voice. You’ll learn how to create a symbiotic relationship with AI, training it to truly understand and reflect your essence. Show Notes | Transcript “We each have something so special – not just one thing, multiple things – and it’s just often dormant for various reasons.” – Shilpa Lewis As women over 50, we often feel conflicted about embracing technology while staying true to our spiritual essence. Shilpa shares her journey from corporate AI expert to spiritual entrepreneur, revealing how she harmoniously marries tech savvy with soul wisdom. We explore: What it means to be visible without being “on” all the time time How to honor your energy while sharing your gifts Why your lived experience is your most powerful marketing strategy Shilpa also shares her Omni Method, a beautifully grounded approach to staying aligned while you grow. It’s a conversation about purpose, pivots, and the quiet courage it takes to keep evolving. If your soul’s been whispering that there’s a gentler way to share your light, this episode is your invitation to listen. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Shilpa Website: omnimindfulness.com Podcast: Omni Mindfulness Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Introduction: Amplifying Your Authentic Message Without Burnout GLORIA GRACE RAND: Namaste. Would you like to know that you could actually grow your spiritual business online without sacrificing your soul or burning yourself up in the process? Well, stay tuned because that’s what we’re going to be talking about today, because my guest has a revolutionary approach for using AI and social media tools to amplify your authentic message while also staying completely aligned with your purpose, which is what I’m all about. So I love this, and I’m so excited to have her. But first, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are, lead boldly, and shine their light in the world. And joining me today is a wonderful woman that I’ve known for a little while now. Her name is Shilpa Lewis, and she is known as your Go to Streamlining with System Sage. She’s an AI and social media strategist meets spiritual strategist, and she helps soulful solopreneurs amplify their presence without burning burnout. As I mentioned, she’s also a podcast host like I am. Her show is called the Omni Mindfulness Podcast, and she’s creator of the Amplify Authentically series, which blends mindful tech with grounded, soulful strategy. And see, that’s what being authentic is about, is, you know, making mistakes sometimes. So without further ado, I’m going to bring Shilpa up here and welcome you officially to Live Love Engage. SHILPA LEWIS: Well, namaste, Gloria, and thank you so much for this sweet, lovely, thoughtful introduction. And I’m so grateful to be here. What Does It Mean to Amplify Authentically? GLORIA: Oh, well, I’m really, you know, we’ve known each other for a little while, and actually, I was wonderfully invited me onto your podcast, and I appreciate that as well. So thank you for that. And I, you know, we’re aligned in a lot of respects because we’re, you know, we have this spiritual and then we have the practical side, but we’ll kind of get into that a little bit more. But I do want to figure we just jump right in and talk about what does it mean to have amplify authentically. Now I can say it in a world where, you know, everyone’s telling us to be louder or post more often. In fact, I know I wonderful, wonderful person that I follow is like, yeah, you can go ahead, post, post all the time if you want. Now it’s like, oh, my goodness. So, yeah, what do you think about all of that? SHILPA: Absolutely. What a lovely question. I believe that Amplify Authentically really talks to the heart of what a lot of us feel when we want to step into the space that can be very intimidating, which is social media, and utilizing it to further our business. And we might be soulful solopreneurs, where being so present on camera and being so present in social media all the time can feel a little bit jarring, intimidating. And quite frankly, if you’re spiritual, you find it energetically draining. So I always say you don’t have to be louder to be present and allow people to know the value you provide so you can amplify those natural gifts and you can do it with authenticity. GLORIA: Sorry, I didn’t mean to put that bug in your hand. Finding Your Authentic Voice in Business SHILPA: Certainly I’m yawning. Also, I feel like—and I always speak from the heart—is that many of us, as we become a little more jaded in the world of, say, corporate. I come from corporate, is that you start censoring everything you say and the pauses, the giggles, the stumbles on the words. And as I started to establish my business and establish my podcast, I had that little voice in my head and I had to, like, learn to tame it down and say, just be yourself. Because at the end, what marketing teaches you is that you want to attract what they call your ideal client avatar, and you probably don’t want somebody who’s always looking overly polished and has it all supposedly figured out. So one day I just had this, like, what you call it? Download. Why don’t you call it Amplify Authentically? Which is essentially the way in which I’m delivering my service now within the umbrella of Omni Mindfulness. Omni Mindfulness is the podcast and business name. But what it is that I do, where I combine the tech with the spirituality, it comes through through Amplify Authentically. Why Your Soul Has a Strategy GLORIA: I love that. I want to ask you about how you actually decided to kind of put that together, but even before that, I think I’d about because there’s some people out there who might be listening to this or watching us on YouTube who maybe have never really thought about bringing business and spirituality together. And you talk about, you know, that our soul has a strategy. So can you help someone out and maybe even just explain to them maybe why it’s a good idea? SHILPA: Yeah. Let me put it this way. I feel like the reason why we do what we do at the end of the day is because we are on our spiritual journey to grow and get connected to whatever you want to call it, the universe or God. And when we lose ourselves, whether it’s in our 9 to 5 job or in building a business, and trust me, I have—it is very easy to slip. But when we lose ourselves in that, we have lost our sight of the North Star. Why we’re doing what we’re doing, what is our purpose? What is our ultimate why? Maybe the smaller why is I want work-life balance. I want a job where I get to call the shots or do things on my own term. But maybe it’s even slightly higher. I want to be more present for my family, my son. It could be even higher. I want to be the kind of soul who feels at the end of her life, she’s truly put all of her energy into realizing who she really is and her connection to the universe. GLORIA: Yeah, I like that. That resonates with me a lot. And so I think that’s so helpful. Shilpa’s Journey: From Corporate to Spiritual Entrepreneur The Path from Computer Science to Spiritual Strategy GLORIA: Yeah, we’re going to have you go through the Omni method, but let’s keep talking a little bit about you. So I want to focus on you because, again, how did you—you mentioned that you come from a corporate background. So how did you wind up deciding to marry spirituality with sort of practical social media marketing? SHILPA: Yeah. To get a little bit boohoo, I also believe that we all have a soul strategy. You mentioned that just moments ago. Like an imprint, like we sort of have a calling and we are given the tools to be on that path. And in my case, I was born in a very traditional Hindu family where spirituality and meditation rituals were just part of what I was around all the time. So that was just an imprint in me. Whether or not as a young adult I was embracing it as effectively is another thing. You know, because I was born and raised in the States. I then lived in India during my very formative years as a teenager and then returned and immediately dropped straight into the very cerebral part of the brain. I joined a very challenging computer science program and had it set in my head. I will go off and get my PhD, which I went and got my master’s, left without the PhD but it was a super driven and ambitious. And in those days computer science was like kind of like the new thing. Not a lot of women in particular were studying it. And I ended up focusing on AI well before it was trendy and ended up combining that with software engineering and design. Practiced something very different than AI, but came full circle in the last few years, realizing that it’s something now that’s becoming more utilized to streamline your efforts. And that was intersecting with when I was developing my own entrepreneurial business. So just the timing of everything. Pivoting and Reinventing Yourself at Any Age And in between in this long story, I slowly transitioned, or what I call pivoted out of corporate. And I never say that I don’t use what I practiced or learned. We all are constantly reinventing ourselves but adopting or pulling in things we’ve already done from our previous parts of our life. So everything I did has helped me do what I’m doing now. And along the way I revisited my roots. So I became a meditation life coach during COVID and I went through this state of epiphanies along the way. Like one day I’m like, you know what? I’m going to buy omnimindfulness.com. My son’s name is Omni, and I’m going to dedicate some part of my life to this. And whatever that this was, I didn’t know what it was yet. It’s sort of organically evolved and still is evolving. GLORIA: I love that and that it’s so cool that there’s so much good lessons here that I want people to be able to take away. Especially the fact that yeah, everything that you’ve done in the past or you know, your background, you know, even from family to a corporate situation that yeah, that you can revisit it and you can still pull some of those skills out. I mean I’m like the same way. I mean I actually started in television, in television production and am working for a business news program when I didn’t, when I’d already changed majors away from business. And so it was like, ah, I was doing terrible in all those courses and so wound up doing mass communications and then, you know, years later wind up starting my own business. So it’s like—and now I’m doing a podcast and it’s video as well. So all of those things come back and now I even know how to edit again because it’s like, oh yeah, I remember doing this. Mostly we had editors who would do it, but I knew that you know, in just watching them how to do stuff. So don’t think that you have to throw out everything. Yeah. And I love how you came up with the name of this too. That’s so cool that you named your son. That’s lovely. SHILPA: Thank you, Gloria. And yeah, to reinforce that, but you were just saying that when you were editing in other parts of your life with media, each of those lessons are with you, the good and bad, right? GLORIA: Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yes, yes. I’ve burned the candle at both ends in the past in a different evening video job that I was in. And so it’s like, yeah, I know the importance of also striving for more of a work-life balance too. The Omni Method: A Framework for Soulful Business Growth Streamlining Your Business Without Overwhelm GLORIA: So I know you mentioned AI and we’re gonna get to that in a minute, but I want to—before we get to that part, I would love for you to start walking us through the Omni Method that you came up with. So what are some of the maybe key pillars and how does it help even solopreneurs, in particular, who you like to work with, keep them from being, you know, overwhelmed and scattered? SHILPA: Yeah, absolutely. Love to share. Even before the Omni Method was something that I truly fine tuned to—step back a little bit. What I’ve created for my business, which is called Omni mindfulness, is a set of frameworks. And I like to use the metaphor that, let’s say there’s energy in the form of water and we’re all energy and it’s flowing, but it’s all scattered everywhere. And it’s hard to gain clarity with that scattered energy. So over time, I recognize that I need to start naming the things that I’m doing repetitively as patterns that are working. And so those are the frameworks. And think of them as the river banks so that now there’s flow and you can recognize the flow because the frameworks are there. So when I started—do you get it right? GLORIA: Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. That makes so much sense. I love metaphors anyway, so it’s good. The Omni Pivot Method: Unveil, Craft, and Elevate SHILPA: Yeah, I’m a big metaphor girl. And so stepping back even higher level, when I started making my what I call micro pivots or bigger pivots in life. And as you and I both agree, these pivots are never like a complete digression from where you were. You are along a journey with stepping stones and you’re taking these lessons with you in the next chapter. I developed what I call the Omni pivot method, which is basically three steps, and it summarizes how I feel I make pivots. And sometimes you could be within one pivot and transitioning within another part of that pivot framework, which there are three parts. I call it unveil, craft, and elevate. And I started to recognize that these three things repeat. So unveil means you’re just doing some soul searching. It could be on a personal level, on some personal decisions, or it could be on a very professional level, like, what should I call my business? What does it stand for? Why am I doing what I’m doing? That’s the unveil. Or in other words, you could call it audit. The second part is crafting. Think of that as like, if you’re really in the trenches of creating your new business, it could be about branding it. So crafting is really could be—I’m branding the voice of who I am. That goes back to authenticity. And then the last part of it is to elevate, which is really amplifying. How do I do this? How do I make my presence known so people are aware that Gloria is out there doing this awesome work, and she’s got a voice, a platform, and how do we advertise that or promote that? Breaking Down the OMNI Acronym Then when you go deeper, as I mentioned, the voice, authentic voice, that’s where the Omni method came in. And I started to really think about how do you align your message with your voice and your why, which is really, really important to a lot of us. So I thought, well, why not come up with something that matches Omni? And again, it goes back to branding. It’s crafting. So the letter O really means own your why and really own it. Like, don’t feel ashamed that—well, I had a friend recently make a comment, and I always think these little anecdotal stories shine a light on where you’re at in life. I reconnected with her on again, off again, a childhood friend, and she goes, well, I thought by now you would have been a doctor. What happened to you? And I honestly, in my head, thought, I’m glad I didn’t become a doctor. So own your why. It’s, you know, my why was a very deeply spiritual thing. And I can’t always articulate it for others, but I surely need to articulate for myself and hopefully with those that are aligned with me, like my friend Gloria, because I think she gets it. And so O is own your Y, M is map your journey and so that is a little more of back to the soul searching. Like, where do I want to go? And then maybe work a little bit backwards. It’s a journey. I always have to remind myself, anybody that’s listening, I don’t have it all figured out. I’m constantly looking at things going, oh, my gosh, where am I? Why am I doing this? Am I there yet? And then I’m like, that’s not the right question. GLORIA: I know. We never get there. Do we get there? SHILPA: And that’s part of the reason why we have to kind of bring ourselves back to our soul mission. We have to be present, right? GLORIA: Yeah. SHILPA: And the N stands for name the shift, articulate the transformation, or pivot. That helps spark something in you, and what new state of being, a result will guide you towards that shift. And so for me, the shifts are sometimes always deeply spiritual. I mean, yeah, it would be great if suddenly I can say, you know, I launched this new bonus podcast, and the shift needs to be 20,000 downloads. But I know that’s the not so accurate authentic shift that I need, but I need to name that shift, so at least I have a goal. And then I stands for infuse your voice. And this goes back to being authentic. GLORIA: I love that. That’s a really powerful acronym. I like it. So I’m trying to say so. And there’s all these wonderful steps. So I’m gonna have to go back in and write these down. So I hope whoever is listening to this, you know, you can go ahead and replay this and write them down, because those were good. Practical Steps to Overcome Overwhelm The Power of Morning Meditation and Grounding Practices GLORIA: So for someone who’s maybe just feeling like overwhelmed with all that’s going on in, you know, even in their business or even in the world right now, what would be a first practical step that someone can take to start, you know, streamlining things? SHILPA: Yeah, the first step, I believe it really actually goes back to the pivot method is, you know, I talked about, you want to really audit what’s going on. And it’s like an assessment, and it could be an assessment of whether it’s a personal or professional. And sometimes really, when you’re aligned, your personal and professional start becoming very much aligned as well. So, like, where do I want to spend my morning and why? And for me, and as just to give you some context, getting grounded really sets the tone for the day. So it doesn’t—I mean, there are deviations to this because I’m human, but most mornings are non negotiable meditation. And that includes not just a meditation technique, but it also includes an extension to that. Practicing gratitude, doing prayer. And I get geeky and scientific about these things as well because of just the way my brain works. Like there’s like the woohoo spiritual side, right? GLORIA: Yeah. SHILPA: But then the other side is like, well, there’s this doctor who had done experiments on hooking up people’s brains to talk about how the frontal cortex is activated after 12 minutes, decreasing PTSD. So when I meditate, I set the timer on my clock saying minimum 12 minutes, because the skeptic in me will come out often, especially when I’m fatigued, and start telling me, why are you doing what you’re doing? This is all woohoo. You don’t even know what’s happening. And then the scientific part of me is like, well, they’ve already done these studies. At least 12 minutes of practice will help you. There have been studies that gratitude does shift the energy and attracts them. Brain Science Meets Spiritual Practice GLORIA: Absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 100%. Yeah. I mean it’s—meditation is good for your, not only your emotional well being, but your physical well being. I mean, there have been studies that have shown this now and so it’s not just woo woo anymore. And it’s probably why, you know, people have been doing it for thousands of years because they just knew intuitively that it was good for them. And you know, Western society is slow to catch up sometimes, but we’re getting there. SHILPA: Yeah. So yeah, absolutely. And we know now that new neural pathways are created. GLORIA: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Which is good to know because we used to think that whatever brain cells we had, that was it. And you know, and yeah, I was listening to something the other day where they were talking about, remember, I know for me, like when I was a kid, they warned about the dangers of alcohol because you’re going to kill off your brain cells. It’s like, well, yes, but you know, you can still heal and it’s okay. Neuroplasticity and Women Over 50 SHILPA: But I love the fact that you mentioned that, because women sometimes we like I get this, we are over 40 or over 50 and there’s certain kind of judgments that are made about because we have this thing called menopause and there’s other conditions that occur and to accentuate that experience, or not accentuated but exasperated, it could be fatigue of the brain. And what I want to remind people is that it’s not set in stone. There is signs that you can improve your cognition and your health. And like, I had this one guy come up to me in a yoga studio and I don’t think he realized I’m a lot older than I look. And he started saying things like, well, you know, women after this and, or people after a certain age, they’re just, they’re not very cognitively sharp anymore. And I just thought, well, wait a minute, that’s old science or old data, right? GLORIA: Absolutely, yes. Because we can continue to keep learning. And in fact, you know, they encourage you to do this as you get older now because it does help even keep things like dementia away. So, you know, and that’s why I’m endeavoring to learn Hungarian. So I have like a 1900 day streak on Duolingo. Thank you very much. I give myself at least a few minutes every day. It’s a slow process. But, you know, that’s one way that I use to be able to do this. And I love that you mentioned the non negotiables because I’m the same way because I think it is so important to have those, whatever you want that practice to be, but to be able to give yourself that gift of spending some time, whether it is prayer, whether meditation. But we both highly recommend meditation. So do something, even if it is for 12 minutes, you know, you can manage, you can carve 12 minutes out of your day for sure. The Importance of Consistency and Context SHILPA: And Gloria, you mentioned something interesting there, that in learning that language, you have made a streak and consistency. And what’s interesting, all the things that you and I talk about, whether it’s spirituality or technology or learning a new language, which is essentially like learning how to use certain kind of technology like AI or all the apps you and I use. That’s how Gloria and I met is we were using an AI app together and we were the mastermind. Is that this stuff, when you put it in context, like the language, you know, they say if you go now and speak that language among those people who speak it, it’s a different experience. GLORIA: Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. In fact, a friend of mine who does speak Hungarian was saying, if you ever want to practice, I’m like, yeah, I know. I’m still not very comfortable at the speaking part of it. It’s like I can recognize words and you know, but yeah, that part is difficult. Using AI to Enhance Your Authentic Voice How to Approach AI Without Losing Yourself GLORIA: But all right, we’re digressing here. I’m going to get back on track here because I want to talk about AI because this is something that has just really, you know, the last few years, it’s just everywhere now. And I know that some people, definitely women, and I think even women over a certain age are a little conflicted about it, a little nervous about it. So how do you recommend that we can approach AI tools in a way that can enhance rather than replace your authentic voice? Because I know that’s what a lot of people are like, oh, it’s going to be—well, especially because I started in my business as a copywriter and there’s like, oh, it’s going to put copywriters out of business, yada, yada. So yeah, how do we do this to use AI authentically and still be able to speak? Training AI to Sound Like You SHILPA: Yeah, this is something that was truly important to me as well as I started to explore the capabilities of tools that are in the caliber or category of copy writing, copy editing. AI is pervasive and there’s different types of AI technologies, so to speak, but the ones that are more mainstream that things that you hear people talking about, such as ChatGPT or Claude, those are language models that allow you to, on a very basic level, produce copy. And the challenge in that level becomes to many people that, well, does it still sound like me? And if you were to just ask AI without any training, so to speak, let’s say you went first time ever, you opened up Chat GPT and just said, help me write my bio. And you gave it very little information. It will sound very generic and it may even sound a little bit artificial because it doesn’t know you. It’s like an intern standing over your shoulder and you’re like, oh, it’s first day out of college, now go write my company bio. And that is very similar to what would happen with AI. What you want to do is create a what I call the symbiotic relationship, a relationship where that entity, so to speak, gets to know you and gets to know your personality. That’s—I’ve created this simple word doc that you can download later and it’s basically allows you to create your authentic voice profile. And this is agnostic to any AI. I want people to go back to unveiling their true voice. Step number one in Pivot. Because quite frankly, when I started to really utilize AI in a more aggressive way to really write, I realized, well, you know what, I may have a style of writing, but I’m not aware of what that style of writing is. I’ve typically been very critical of my own speaking and writing. So should I be more academic? Should I be more casual? Should I sound like I would sound like with a friend? The Power of Self-Reflection Before Technology So these are the kind of things that you need to introspect on and unveil and audit. And maybe the way you sound and write does need to be a little more professionally toned for copy that appears on your website. But if you’re writing an email to a friend, it may be very different. So this level of introspection needs to occur. That’s where I encourage people to go through this. I think it’s five to seven steps document I put together where you think about different scenarios and you just write. So that’s your opportunity to know your authentic voice. GLORIA: Yeah. And I think that is so important for people to remember because even though you can train the AI to really sound like you and even the tool that we met through has come up with some really good things that it really does. It does sound like me a lot. And yet there’s still some times where it just comes up and does things the same old way. And it’s like, I’m not going to do it that way. I’m going to start this newsletter a different way. But, you know, the bulk of it is still pretty good. Okay, but I can shift it. AI as a Creative Partner But I will tell you, it is amazing because when you do take that time, as you’re talking about, of really training the AI to know you, and that requires you doing the introspective work first and getting you getting clear on that, it’s amazing what it can come up with. In fact, I did a podcast episode about this a while back where it came up with—it came up with a framework for me and an acronym. And I was like, wow, this is pretty good. So I went and I searched. I was like, okay, I want to make sure nobody else has done this, because I don’t want to be infringing and everybody’s, you know, I don’t want to do copyright infringement. Nobody had. And so I asked, I said, okay, how’d you come up with this? Because I like this. It’s pretty good. I made a little couple tweaks to it. And I said, well, because I know you, because I know the type of content that you’ve been doing, and this is where you like to position yourself. And I was like, okay, so it can be quite amazing. And of course, now it gave me a framework, but now I get to put my secret sauce into it. My background, my stuff. So have you found anything like that in your experience? Creating Your Brand Guide for AI SHILPA: Absolutely. And you know, because that type of AI that we use, the model, it’s a learning model. It’s learning from you, it’s learning with you, and it’s learning at a very exponential rate. So two years ago, when I started to utilize AI, my training of it was probably more like depending—I was depending on it to learn slowly. But then I became a little more savvy, and in the back end of these technologies, you can give it guidance, so to speak. So my authentic voice guide eventually became my more evolved brand guide. And what it was is after reflecting and introspecting, I then mapped it to the brand. And so when I’m writing now, like you said, it’s evolving with you. So let’s say you have a framework, but it’s evolving just like we all are, then it’s actually understanding that you’re evolving. It sometimes will remind you of those things. And if it’s a new conversation, think of it as somebody who’s just a new intern and they need to get up to speed. What I do is there’s a symbol called at something, something you can invoke, so to speak, the knowledge. I mean, trying to keep this very simple terms, you can invoke the knowledge of your brand guide to come in and say, hey, remind me of all of these frameworks and my ideal client and the key terms that I use when I’m talking about my products. It’ll list it for you, and then you can say, okay, thank you, you can leave the room now, you can turn it off. And then you start doing what you want to do. Maybe it’s a new service that you’re creating, but now it’s like the intern is now up to speed, right? GLORIA: Yeah. Oh, that’s so cool. Okay, I’m going to have to try that out. I like that idea a lot. Oh, gosh. There’s like so much. And I almost feel like, you know, we might even have to have you back another time, because there’s so many things I want to talk about. Creating Soulful Content That Connects Strategic Posting vs. Being a Slave to Social Media GLORIA: Can you maybe share an example of what soulful content creation looks like versus just posting for the sake of getting something out there? SHILPA: Ah, I love that question. Okay, so I think if it is twofold, one is what let’s say you’re posting something and Gloria and I met through a mastermind where we were using a certain technology to produce content, whether that content is post production for a podcast and all the snippets and information that is associated with the podcast, or it could be to promote your product, podcast or some service and that goes into social media as a newsletter or a social post posting. I observed, I know that Gloria and I have had this conversation, can become something that you become a slave of. Like you—it’s the very sense of why you don’t want to be on social media at times, because posting for the sake of posting and you know, and I don’t want to be an influencer because my God, it seems like their soul is taken, you know. But if you’re strategic, that’s why I use the word strategic. If you’re strategic about it, you’re like, well, let me take a step back. I know that like for instance, I just launched a new bonus series yesterday on my podcast and I knew it was coming. So I designed the social media content weeks, if not months ago, knowing that by June it will launch. And by June I may not know exactly all the details, but I’ll be talking about X, Y and Z. So let me design the posts to map to that. Let me design the posts for that map to the human psychology of when somebody sees something they don’t want to be sold to, they probably don’t even know you. And if they know you, they probably just are there to—maybe if they’re reading your posts, they’re engaged. But usually when somebody reads your post, it’s for education, entertainment, or engagement of some type. It’s one of those three categories. Respecting Your Audience’s Journey So you want to be aware where the person who’s reading it, where they may be coming from, and then become aware of what your intention is. So that’s where the soulful part comes out. Like, am I being intentional and am I being respectful? Because you don’t want to feed them stuff. And then people are like, you know what? Shilpa’s just always posting about wanting to sell something. I’m going to turn her off. GLORIA: Yeah, we don’t want that for sure. So cool. SHILPA: Does that answer your question? GLORIA: Yeah, I think so. I think that’s helpful. One Simple Practice for More Mindful Business Bringing Intention Into Everything You Do GLORIA: Let me see here. I’m trying to think what else I want to ask you because like I said, there’s so many things. What’s one simple practice that someone listening to this today could start to bring more mindfulness into their business so that they really can start, you know, lean into being a more soulful solopreneur, let’s put it that way. SHILPA: Yeah, I’m just kind of coming up with a quick way to summarize one approach. I think that the biggest challenge is being in alignment. And I don’t think this is something that’s taught to us in school. I didn’t go to business school. I do talk about the science or the spiritual science of business. I do believe that’s something that will evolve in our new generation because I think we need it. And as we work on content, work on strategy, work on whatever it is that we’re trying to do as a service, I believe that being intentional is a value. So just like when you start your day, maybe your intention is today I seek clarity and I summon clarity from the universe and I want that clarity come through also in my business. So start with intention. And ideally, this is what I’ve mentioned earlier to you is that intention is the same intention you have for your personal life. Because I am so done with people living their lives. Are they saying, that’s the professional me, that’s the personal me. Maybe we need to just be holistically embodied in both. The Importance of Authentic Integration GLORIA: Yeah, yeah, I think that makes sense. Because, I mean, yes, there’s certain things that you want to be able to keep separate, but you also, if you are showing up as yourself in your personal life, you want to be able to show up as yourself and your business as well. Because, and I know I’ve talked about this in the past, that if when you’re trying to be like somebody else, maybe you’re following some other mentors way of saying, oh, we need to do it this way. And then you start maybe sharing information on social media in that realm, or you start doing emails that way. But then when you start working with clients and maybe you’re doing like one on one work or something, and then you’re talking in a different way, there’s going to be a disconnect and people are going to be like, well, which one of you is the real you? Because I was attracted to you because you were this but now you’re doing this and it can just, if you’re just being you, it’s a lot easier. So you don’t have to think about, okay, what’s my professional hat and what’s my personal hat? SHILPA: Right, yeah, absolutely. And it does help because otherwise we get this inner conflict for ourselves. And that’s not to say you mentioned it. I say this in my writing, and when I speak that, it’s a tug of war. I mean, you can’t just immediately just say, I know this part of me shouldn’t say this. Sometimes we’re human, we’ll just say it. Right? GLORIA: Yeah. SHILPA: But you probably don’t want to. When I say authentic, I’m not saying divulge and show and, you know, advertise everything because… GLORIA: Right. SHILPA: You probably don’t want to, because we’re all growing, and sometimes it’s not necessary to add to that information, whatever it is that we’re sharing. GLORIA: Right. SHILPA: But if you just sometimes mention something, that’s okay. I’m just saying maybe be more forgiving to yourself also. Vulnerability as a Strength, Not a Weakness GLORIA: Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And I think part of it is, you know, being willing to be vulnerable and do share some things, you know, like even, you know, messing up the word at the beginning, like I did on the podcast today. But it didn’t make a big deal of it. You know, we just let it go. And that makes you more relatable so that people say, okay, well, this person can flub up. I guess I can flub up too. But you don’t, you know, projectile everything, you know, that’s going out in your life. You still want to, you know, kind of pick and choose the things you share. SHILPA: Absolutely. Final Wisdom: Stay Curious About Who You’re Becoming GLORIA: Yeah. Let’s see. Okay, I’m going to ask you this because, like I said, I know we didn’t even get to touch on a couple other things, but if you wanted to be able to share, like, one really important concept for today to leave our audience with, or if there was something I didn’t ask you about, there was, like, why didn’t you ask me about that? Go ahead. Your floor is yours for a bit. The Evolution of Self SHILPA: You know, I really encourage curiosity, and that goes hand in hand with vulnerability and courage. I feel like we each have something so special. Not just one thing, multiple things, and it’s just often dormant for various reasons. We think, this is me. I put myself in a little box. There’s a label on the box. Like, I can now leave the box and pivot. Right. Or micro pivot. And I’m not—and what I’m trying to say is I encourage you to stay curious about who you think you are, but who are you becoming? What are you evolving to? GLORIA: I like that. Yeah. And that’s so funny, because usually one last question that I do like to ask my guest is, what are you curious about? So what are you curious about? Navigating the Dark Nights of the Soul SHILPA: I’m personally curious about the evolution of who I’m becoming on a more spiritual level, because there are times where I go through the darkest of dark times in trying to really grow. And maybe it’s because I’m more introspective and I’m sometimes I’m harder on myself. I just feel like, how can I come out of this and be the person I want to be? And sometimes you think, am I getting there? And I recently had somebody tell me, oh, just from two years ago, I see a shift. Sometimes we don’t see it, and sometimes it comes through. GLORIA: That’s true. Yeah. Yeah, it’s amazing. Yeah, I know I’ve done that. I had one time where I was—had gone through a program, and then someone saw me, like, I don’t know, a couple months later, and they’re like, wow, you look so much lighter. You know, it was just my energy was better and I didn’t fully appreciate it. And I was like, oh, well, that’s nice that they saw that. So, yeah, yeah, I like that. Where to Find Shilpa and Her Resources GLORIA: I’m sure there are tons of people out there who are going to be like, okay, I want to know more about this wonderful lady and maybe also listen to their podcast and get the freebies that you were talking about that download. So where can people contact you? Omni Mindfulness and Amplify Authentically SHILPA: Okay, so I have—and I’ll provide the links so that you have all of them. I have a main website, omnimindfulness.com but I also have all of my freebies and other things that are evolving in through my new initiative called Amplify Authentically, which just was launched recently. And that is a bonus track where I offer digital courses, meaning what I call like the Quick bite audio podcast. 10 to 20 minutes. You can listen to it wherever you go. It’s all based on this concept of lean learning and learning technology, but without feeling like it’s overwhelming you. Because we talked about overwhelm. GLORIA: Right? Free Resources and Course Offerings SHILPA: Amplify Authentically is a store that I created where you can download my more spiritual free tool, which is to be victorious in life. It is a guided reflection tool. And I’m creating your authentic voice guide, which is sort of in between mindfulness and stepping towards technology. It’s AI agnostic because I want people to first get over the intimidation of AI and then I have a few other free tools there. Then I have my coursework, membership, and other things. And then I encourage you to check out my Omni mindfulness podcast, which is free. And the Amplify Authentically bonus track, the month of June, you can get tested out because it’s all free for the first month. Then after that, there’ll be a nominal fee. GLORIA: Okay, well, spoiler alert, folks, that you’re listening to this. It’s after June, so I’m sorry you’re gonna have to pay now. But I’m really blown away by how much you have accomplished, actually, you know, because I’ve known you for a while, and I love all of these different things that you’re doing. And so I think it’s going to be wonderful resources for folks. And I know I’m going to take advantage of it, too. Closing: Soul Sisters in Business SHILPA: Gloria, I am so honored to be here. And, you know, often when you post things, it always resonates with my heart, and that’s why I wanted to have you on my show. I’m like, the social posts you make are so in sync with my spiritual perspective. GLORIA: Yeah, yeah. Yes. You know, we know soul sisters when we come across them, so it’s great. And I definitely consider you that. So thank you so much for joining us today, and I really—yeah, I know our audience got a lot of value out of it today. SHILPA: Well, thank you, Gloria, and I would love to have you back in the future. GLORIA: All right, excellent. We’ll make plans for sure. And I do want to thank all of you for listening and watching today. And I hope that if you’re not subscribed already, that you are subscribed on your favorite podcast platform, whatever that is. And of course, you can always go to my website to access the podcast and also subscribe on YouTube, where that way you get to see as well as hear us. And I think that’s gonna do it for this time around. And so until next time, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.    

What if networking didn’t have to feel like a performance? In this heartfelt episode, I sit down with Jen Fort, author, encourager, and creator of “Connectworking,” to reimagine what connection can look like when it’s rooted in generosity, presence, and truth. Together, we explore how letting go of the “perfect pitch” and embracing authenticity leads to more meaningful relationships, both personally and professionally. Show Notes | Transcript “You have to get into a right mindset, I believe, when you start those conversations, because if not you’ll come across as if you’ve got that loop playing in your head of well, why would somebody want to spend time talking to me?” – Jen Fort If you’ve ever felt like networking is one more thing you’re supposed to be good at but secretly dread, consider this episode your permission to do it differently. You’ll discover: Why the word “networking” itself makes people recoil—and what to call it instead The one question that opens doors without feeling salesy or awkward How to walk into a room where you know no one and become the person everyone wants to talk to (hint: arrive early) The “safari strategy” for reaching out to people without making them—or you—anxious Why leading with generosity isn’t just nice, it’s strategic A simple spreadsheet system for staying in touch without turning into a robot The power of a handwritten note in a world drowning in emails We also talk about something unexpected: how a LinkedIn connection led to a conversation that changed my health. It’s evidence that real connections don’t just help your business. They can also change your life. This isn’t about collecting contacts. It’s about building a circle of people who actually matter to you, and letting yourself matter to them. If you’ve been showing up to networking events with a knot in your stomach, or avoiding them altogether because they feel fake, this conversation might be the reset you need. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Jen Website: jen-fort.com Website: wisdomandwarnings.com IG and Facebook: @wisdomandwarnings Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT: From Performing to Connecting: Finding Authenticity in Networking Guest: Jen Fort Host: Gloria Grace Rand Podcast: Live Love Engage Introduction: Moving Beyond Forced Networking Gloria Grace (Host): Namaste. Are you tired of networking that just feels forced and fake? Well, stay tuned because my guest and I are going to be talking about how asking the right questions and leading with generosity can actually transform that awkward small talk into powerful connections that actually help your business and soul thrive. But first I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I help women entrepreneurs like you. I’m assuming that you are a woman entrepreneur listening to this, but I help you turn your inner critic into your greatest marketing asset. And joining us in just a moment is Jen Fort, and she is an author, encourager and creator of Connect Working, a new take on networking. That’s all about real connection. She shares wisdom for life’s milestones with heart, humor and honesty. And whether you’re starting fresh or reaching out, Jen helps you grow your circle and your courage. One meaningful convo, she says in her bio at a time. So without further ado, I’m going to bring her on and welcome you, Jen, officially to Live Love Engage. Jen Fort (Guest): Well, hello, great to be here. Thanks for having me. Gloria Grace: Well, I am delighted to have you because I have been a networker now for well let’s see, I guess well over 15 years, since I started my business way back in 2009. And it’s been an interesting journey. Some days I like it, some days I don’t. I even founded my own networking group in the past couple of years and so, but I know definitely, as an entrepreneur, it’s not always easy. So I loved the name of your or how you phrase this as connect working. So I’m wondering what caused you to come up with that way of referring to networking. Did you have some type of, you know, bad oh, should we say experience that’s the word I’m looking for that led to that. So I’m curious. From Corporate Career to Connect Working: An Unexpected Journey Jen Fort: Yeah. So this all came about? I had been working in the corporate world for almost 20 years and I had what I call an unexpected departure and which that caused a 180 degree pivot in my career and it landed me in the role of a career transition coach. So I catch people when they get laid off, help dust them off, figure out where they need to go next and I send them on their merry way with some tips and tricks and tools. And one thing I learned through those conversations because networking is such a big part of finding your next job or anything related to business but every time we talked about networking it almost looked like the person felt like they were going to go into a root canal. They just got that awkward, cringy kind of feel and look and they’re like, oh, it’s the last thing I want to be doing. So through those conversations I just thought you know, networking is really just about human connection view of what networking is. So it’s really about human connection and, yeah, there is a bit of work to be done when you’re trying to make those human connections. So I just kind of it just came to me one day. It’s like it’s connecting, it’s working, it’s connect working, and that’s just kind of how the concept came up. Building Real Connections Through Authentic Conversation Gloria Grace: Well, I love that because, you’re right, it is all about building connections, and I know one of the networking groups that I had joined years ago. What I loved, what made it different from some of the other groups that I had been attending in, was the fact that they would do masterminds during our luncheons and where we could talk not only about issues that were going on in our business but even in our personal lives and we and you know and that was encouraged that we could, you know, talk about and to really be real and Women’s Prosperity Network. I will tell you that that’s what. What the name of the organization was and is, and I’m still a member. Yeah, there were other networking groups that I’ve gone to where it was just you know people, just oh, here’s my business card and you know, and it’s like that’s not really you know, I’d like to maybe get to know you. So, you know, I mentioned in the lead in here is that it’s about asking right questions. So what’s maybe like a favorite question that you have that you would like to ask people when you are first connecting with someone? The Power of Asking Better Questions Jen Fort: Well, if it is in a, especially if it’s in a business scenario, I like to ask them what’s the most interesting thing you’ve done this week? And it just gets off of the. It gets them curious about what’s lighting them on fire. Because, if you think about it, when are people most open and engaging and wanting to have a conversation? When they’re talking about themselves, right. So by you opening up a conversation with something that helps them share something they’re passionate about or they’re excited about, that just opens the door to a bit of a more genuine conversation, and then you can take and pivot a conversation in any direction pretty much, but it’s really about getting them to talk about themselves really about getting them to talk about themselves. Common Networking Mistakes That Kill Connection Gloria Grace: Well, and actually I want to kind of go back here because I know I explained part of what the reason why I get turned off at times from networking Maybe. What are? Because, like I said, I think that’s a huge mistake that people make is thinking they can just walk up and hand you their business card. What are some maybe other key mistakes that people might make when they do go networking that you’ve seen them make? That is going to maybe stop that connection from happening. Jen Fort: It’s the intimidation factor of thinking that folks are higher in the food chain than they are. Because when you walk into, or whether it’s virtually or in person, the automatic assumption that this person is out of touch, out of reach, that they are of an executive level and I am only a lowly manager or that. Why it’s a little bit of that. It’s the cliche term right now the imposter syndrome. Why would somebody want to talk to me? I’m just a blank, there’s nothing interesting about me. So it’s. You have to get into a right mindset, I believe, when you start those conversations, because if not you’ll come across as if you’ve got that loop playing in your head of well, why would somebody want to spend time talking to me? It comes out in your mannerisms, your eye contact, your body language. So sometimes you just need to kind of pump yourself up a little bit and I kind of like having people practice casual, small conversations outside of a typical formal networking environment just to get comfortable with having random conversations with random people. Networking Tips for Introverts: Arrive Early and Be the Greeter Gloria Grace: Yeah, I think that’s a really good suggestion for people to be able to do, because it does, it takes that intimidation factor away and it takes your nervousness away because especially and I go, I know, for me I’m I’m an introvert in some situations and and others I’m not. And I know, when I first walk into a room where there’s like maybe not many people I know at all, then it’s like it’s hard to be able to figure out how to approach someone. So what would you say to someone in that situation where they go to a networking or you know meeting and I am talking, we’ll probably talk maybe some differences about online versus in-person, but I think a lot of people are getting back to doing the in-person ones now. So if someone walks into a room and I don’t know anybody and they are someone who is a little bit more introverted, what advice would you have for them? Jen Fort: The advice I would give is from even before you attend is if the event starts at 10 o’clock, get there at 950. Like, be one of the first people to arrive, because if you’re there at the event and people are coming into the space, then you’re already there and you can more or less act as a quasi greeter. You know you’re not with the, the folks that are running the event, but you’re there and you’re helping invite people in and then you’re a helper, because it’s sometimes that just kind of takes the perspective away from the, the, the connection, and it makes it makes you give them something, you’re giving them a warm greeting, you’re welcoming them in and then, cause they’re probably just as nervous as you are or, you know, has a little bit of anxiety. So you can be that safe space for somebody to come in and even if it is a, you’re just there hey, welcome, nice to see you today. They might even ask you where’s the registration table. So if you get there a little early, you kind of get the lay of the land and you can kind of help, direct people, you know, just in a helpful way, and then you’ve established yourself as someone who is helpful, approachable and you’re making it about a thing. It’s not about you, it’s not about, oh my gosh, what’s on my agenda. How many people do I want to meet? Because then you’ve met just about everybody as they come through the door. Gloria Grace: I love that and I think also, it then will sort of prompt someone else to say, well, you know, yeah, thanks for helping me do that. You know what is it that you do and then, so now it’s like you have that opportunity to be able to talk about yourself, as opposed to you know feeling like you need to go introduce yourself. So you know to ask somebody else about themselves. So I love that yourself. So you know to ask somebody else about themselves. So I love that. Online Networking vs In-Person: Benefits and Challenges Let’s talk a little bit about, because there’s so many things I want to talk about online and what have you found that are maybe some unique either challenges and maybe even benefits for networking online versus networking in person. Jen Fort: Well, I think one of the big benefits is when you’re online, you have the ability to share a lot. You can kind of cast a wide net if you are. So I believe that connect working is about the give more so than the take. So if I am looking to network with people in a certain space, then I present myself online. Maybe it’s LinkedIn, or maybe it’s on my website or any project that I’m doing in a way that I am giving something of value. Whether it is well so good example is just the other day, because I work with folks that are trying to find jobs, I just gave a really kind of an offbeat tip on for LinkedIn about how to be more visible to recruiters, and so it’s just then that just kind of touches people that are in that that mindset. So by give, you can share things. It’s easier to share links to articles, Ted Talks, podcasts, so it’s a great way to you don’t have to come up with everything. You don’t have to come up with a message or a request. It can be. You know, it can be a. I found this really great podcast or this great article on this topic. You were the first person that came to mind. I wanted to share it with you. Here’s a link. And when you add, when you approach it from a a gracious, here I’m giving you something that I thought would be helpful to you or something that made me think of you, the vast majority of the time the person will reach back and say, hey, thanks, that was really nice. And at least there there’s that they’ve opened the door to having a two way conversation. Conversation and maybe they don’t respond. It’s not a big deal, but at least that way you are establishing yourself as a person of value and you’re not just sharing, you know, silly little things that are jokes or this or that. It might be on the side. Hey, I know you were planning a trip to Italy. I found this great article on, you know, whatever region of Italy. So it’s a way to connect with people on a personal level, but about a thing, and it’s not always about the job or the business connection, or I want to sell you something. It’s providing them something that puts a smile on their face. Leading With Generosity: The Give More Than Take Approach Gloria Grace: Yeah, and I think that’s so important. When you approach this and this goes for, I think, all aspects of business If you can approach it with that giving mentality, then things just flow a lot easier and you are going to be able to make really good connections much more easily because you’re the person who is, who is being generous, as, as opposed to, you know, when you go to, like you know, when you go to buy a car, and you know that the sale car salesman is going to go over and you know, try to try to get the best deal for him, you know, and his and the dealership, then they aren’t necessarily going to be for you, but if, if you can come at it from, you know you’ve got this person’s best interest at heart, you want to be generous, then and then it also and I think I’ve even had somebody on the podcast before in the past talks about, I think it starts this there is sort of this reciprocal thing that goes on in our brains too, because when you’re giving, then it’s sort of you know, then the other person wants to then return the favor, as it were, and give to you, and so it can be a good give and take as we go. The Safari Strategy: Approaching Connections Without Aggression Jen Fort: I guess, and I talk to, when I’m talking to the candidates that are looking for jobs these days, I tell them, I always tell them to use I call it my safari strategy. I’m like you know, if you ever go on safari, they tell you don’t go with the animals straight on because it’s going to make them anxious, they’re going to run away. So the tactic is always to kind of come around it from the side, something a little less aggressive or assertive. And when you make it about a thing and not about you, you’re, um, it kind of eases that, you know, kind of takes that anxiety down. And um, uh, what I’m talking to folks about, like when they’re in job search and they’re like, oh, I have to network with so many people, I’m like don’t make it about the job, just make it about a connection. Hey, it works perfectly in like January, February, because you can blame it on your new year’s resolution. Hey, this year I’m being more intentional about staying in touch with folks. You were at the top of my list wondering how are you making out? We’d love to know. How are the wife and kids? Did you ever take that trip to? So-and-so? And when you make it about that nine times out of 10, the person’s going to respond back, and then they’ve opened the door and conversation will organically come back around to yeah, I’m doing great, we did take that trip, it was a lot of fun. Hey, what’s up with you? And then they’re opening the door to furthering the conversation. How Authentic Connections Lead to Unexpected Benefits Gloria Grace: Yeah, and you know. The other thing I’m going to say, too, is that you never know these connections that you make. Yes, of course, if it’s, you know, maybe you’re in a job search situation or you’re, you know, an entrepreneur and you’re looking for, maybe, a client, or you’re looking for a new supplier or something like that. But sometimes connections can really help you personally and in ways that are unexpected. And I may have said this on the podcast before, I’m not sure, or else I was sharing it with a friend of mine that I made a connection on LinkedIn with a lovely gentleman and we started, you know, having we met over Zoom a couple times and had some lovely conversations about, you know, what we’re each doing in our business. And then the last one we were on, he mentioned that he was releasing a lot of weight and he had this new program, and so he told me about this book called Post-Diabetic and recommended it highly. And I bought that book last October and in let’s see, about five months, I have totally changed how I eat and have released like almost 50 pounds. Oh, I need that book, Post-Diabetic. You can find it online. Put it down. Yeah, it’s by two authors. One of them is a doctor they also have when you buy the book. You can even have access to an online course, which was phenomenal and I mean frankly, I mean he has. You know, I was on track to probably, you know I was probably getting to be borderline pre-diabetic and I didn’t want to go there. You know, my mom had diabetes, my mom had a high blood pressure and it’s like I’ve so far been lucky. But you know, as you get older I’m in my 60s now it’s like, okay, I need to take better care of myself. So when you come at things with this genuine connection, you know you never know what may come about. Balancing Authenticity With Strategic Networking So, which leads me to my next question, because I would love to. You know, we all are also, like I said, you know, we’ve got business owners probably watching the show. If there is someone who is, you know, on a job search. How do you balance being authentic with being strategic? Jen Fort: And when you are trying to build some new relationships. Yeah, that’s a really good question. What I like to suggest to folks because if you have an intention whether it’s your job or it’s in your business you know where you want to go and what your outcome is. So taking a look at your own personal network, your LinkedIn contacts, and seeing who should be the people that could be the most helpful both ways and kind of prioritizing those contacts first, because you know you’re not going to cast a huge wide net because you won’t be able to follow up with everyone and I think that’s one of the mistakes that people make is they cast this huge wide net because somebody out there is going to have a contact for me, somebody is going to have a contact for me, somebody’s going to be helpful. But if you can’t be intentional with following up with people, it can just it can really undermine any progress that you’ve made in that relationship. And and by making about a thing because you want to be interested in the person, you know, if you feel like I need to network with Sue over there because I know she could be helpful, but there’s zero pure intent to it, I would think twice about trying to establish that connection until I feel that there’s something that I can give and get in return, because no one wants to feel like they’re being used. Follow-Up Strategies: How Soon Is Too Soon? Gloria Grace: Yeah, that’s so important. I appreciate that, and you mentioned a key phrase there that I want to follow up with. Which is following up there? That I want to follow up with which is following up? Because I in the past haven’t always been the best person at doing a very good job of that, and so I got a couple of things I want to ask you about. So first thing I want to ask is how soon is too soon for a follow up? Actually, there’s three questions, so I’m going to start, because I often have the bad habit of putting two questions together, so I’m just going to start with that one. So how soon is too soon for follow-up? Jen Fort: You know it depends, because if you’re in a conversation with someone and they were like, like we were just talking about that book, right, and oh my gosh, that’s a great book, you can follow up the next day. Great to have that conversation. Hey, I forgot the name of that book. Could you share that with me? And you want to follow up quickly because the conversation’s fresh. But if you’re in a conversation, maybe it’s a business conversation and you know that they are super, super busy. Maybe you want to wait a couple of days, and so it’s. You have to, kind of, you have to read the room, you have to be able to read the room, but at the same time, you want to. You don’t want to go too long, but here’s a tactic that I’ve taken before. So I just recently did a publicity event where I got to meet 80 different people from the media. It was fantastic. But of those 80 people, 60 of them said oh my gosh, follow up with me. I’d love to have a conversation. I’m like that’s a lot of people. So I knew that. And then I knew that if I tried to do a very generic response, it’s not authentic, it’s not me. So I wanted to take my time and be intentional with contacting each person, do a little bit more research, make sure it’s the right fit. So what I did was then I recorded just a really quick little hey, remember me, because people are visual, so I know that. So I took the folks that were the hottest. I’d looked at priority let’s go priority wise and then I knew for the people that it would be a month, maybe two months, till I got back with them. I recorded something visually so I could do my take my time, write an intentional email to them plus include a link to a 30-second. Hey, remember me. I met you back in March. We talked about da-da-da, and I’ve gotten quite a bit of good response from that because people appreciated the fact that I made it easy for them to remember who I was, that they didn’t have to go back through their memory bank and think, hmm, who was that person? She talked about career reinvention, she talked about connect working. She talked about wisdom and warnings who was that? And they couldn’t remember my name. So I always think, whatever I can do to make it easier on the other person like, help them, to help you back it doesn’t. Didn’t take more than two minutes to create that little video and I embedded in all my follow-ups. Making Follow-Ups Memorable With Personal Touches Gloria Grace: Now, Well, and I think you just answered my next question, which was going to be what makes a follow-up memorable, and I think that is a really good way, but do you have any other ideas on that front? Because I love the video idea, I’m going to steal that one idea. Jen Fort: I’m going to steal that one by all means, because we have to learn from each other, right? Yeah, so make it personal. It could be just here’s what I love to do with. You’re in a business networking and so maybe you crack out your phone, you pull up LinkedIn, your LinkedIn app. There’s a quick way to get to your QR code. You’re having a conversation. You know what? This was such a great conversation. I would love to continue this. Can we connect on LinkedIn and you quick, easy scan my QR code? But could be something about her? That is, that you relate in the conversation but something about the person. You text it to yourself and then, when you do your follow-up reference something personal about them. It was great to meet you at this event. We talked about so-and-so. You know how did that project go? You were getting ready to. You know you had a big sales presentation. How’d your sales presentation go? We’d love to hear about it. And again, you’re engaging them on a more of a personal, intentional level. Simple Systems for Tracking Connections and Follow-Ups Gloria Grace: I love that All right. Third question I’m going to ask you now because, especially when you mentioned the 60 people so what kind of system do you have or do you recommend for keeping track of people and their unique details other than you know texting, which is good, but then I would presume you’re going to have to put that into some other type of document or something to be able to keep track of that. So without you know, yeah, so what kind of system that that you can make? But it, you know, it’s not too mechanical, or things like that. Jen Fort: Excel is my friend. I kind of keep. I just keep a very basic spreadsheet. I know some other people use like CRM, they use some other type of apps or whatnot, but I just keep it very, very simple. I have a spreadsheet of who they are, what their status is, and it could be that I’ve reached out and I’m waiting. It could be that I’m booked for something I’ve completed or not applicable. They’re just people that you know it’s just not going to go anywhere. Completed or not applicable, they’re just people that you know it’s just not going to go anywhere. And then I do keep some basic details in that spreadsheet and I do have when was the last time we contacted and I do have a field for next contact so I can very easily go in and do some filters or some sorting and say, okay, who are the ones that I’ve reached out and I’m waiting on, who are the people that? What are my next touch points? So it may be that you know we, I sent my, my email out on a certain date and I just put in the field of next contact. I just put the date two weeks later so that I can just kind of refilter on that field and just know who’s coming up. Who do I have to touch up? touch base with this week. Email, Phone, or Mail: What Actually Works in 2025 Gloria Grace: One other thing I want to ask you about, because that just occurred to me too and because I know I’ve been in other trainings and things and I think people have different opinions about this What is your? Let’s say that you meet someone. Let me give you a concrete example. Let’s say you meet someone, you have a great conversation and you think that you know I really I have something that this person can use. You know, and you really do think that they could be a good prospect for your business. What do you feel is like a good way? So let’s say, you follow up. Maybe you know email. I guess what I want to get at is email maybe, versus old school picking up the phone. What’s your thoughts on those? Jen Fort: You know if you have their phone number. I think that’s a really great Posing cons aback. You’ve got their phone number. It’s great to reach out and try and contact them. However, lots of people these days see a number they don’t recognize and they send it right to voicemail. So when I’m reaching out to someone and I can tell your call has just been forwarded to voicemail, I know they just ditched the call, which is totally fine. We all do it because spam is so prevalent. But what I’ll do is I’ll leave a voicemail and at the end I’ll say, hey, I’m going to send you a text message. So you know this wasn’t spam. So then I will finish my voicemail and then I will send them a text message and say, hey, this is Jen. I just sent, left you a voicemail, just wanted to let you know that that that call was not spam. Um, so I love that. I also love sending something in the mail. You know if you have her address and there’s something to send. Um, you know the fact that I’ve written a couple books lately, since I was unexpectedly departed from my company. I wrote a couple books and I have had some people from that media event that I was at say oh you know, just send me a PDF of the book. Send me the book, I’d love to see it. Most people will just send the PDF of the book because it’s so quick and easy. But how much more impactful is it if you take the time, handwritten note, put the book in the envelope and shoot it to them, because how nice is it to get mail these days? That’s not a bill and it’s not like the circular for the grocery store. Gloria Grace: I tell you I second that and, as someone who was on a media event and have booked several people to be on the podcast, that I had two people who actually did send me from this latest round, who sent me their books, and it was so lovely to. Actually, I’m still old school and I mean I do love the Kindle. It is convenient and sometimes you know if I’m waiting in line or I’m waiting at a doctor’s appointment, you know I can read my phone, but if I’m home, I like a physical book and I really love to be able to read that. And so it was, yeah, that’s a really great idea. I think that’s so amazing. Let’s get back to old school. I like old school. Yeah, absolutely. You know there’s a reason. These things worked, you know, and it doesn’t, even though we’re in the 21st century now. I think that’s smart, you know, and you could probably also I know I have sometimes in the past would even do like I’ll email and say I’m also going to call you and leave you a voicemail or something, or vice versa, you know. So that way you are kind of reaching them in two different ways Because, yeah, you’re right, I mean I don’t answer phone calls. That I don’t know either, because it’s like if they really want to talk to me, they’re going to leave me a voice message. Jen Fort: Right. Overcoming the Fear of Networking: Addressing Insecurity Gloria Grace: Yeah, so that’s the deal you know you talked about earlier that. You know you have, like, people who have said to you oh you know, I hate networking, or, you know, maybe they just feel that they’re really bad at networking. So what do you think, though, maybe is their real challenge. What do you think? Jen Fort: Insecurity, insecurity, and I think COVID also did a number on a lot of people, especially the folks that were the younger ones, who were, you know, in college, that they came out of college and they went right into the workforce and it was all virtual and there’s they’re the years where it’s so important to get out there and meet people and talk to people and just learn how to have conversation again. So I think COVID really did. There’s a lot of good that came out of it, a lot of bad that came out of it, and I think that having organic conversations is something that suffered. Gloria Grace: I agree, I agree, and I will say this and maybe get your take on it too. And she is a web designer, and she did you know online marketing. She did you know. She was active on social media for a while. Now she, I think, probably is just getting referrals, so she doesn’t even have to do a whole lot. So if someone out there and I think it probably part of it is that she’s just more comfortable behind a computer screen and I think there are still lots of people out there, no matter what their age, frankly, you know, you don’t have to be necessarily 20-something or 30-something so if someone wants to, let’s say, though, that they do want to be able to meet people, they do want to be able to connect. How to Network Online: Adding Value in Digital Spaces What specific tips do you have for someone who just wants to be able to network online? Jen Fort: Online. I think that’s getting involved with groups or associations or being intentional about what is the topic and adding value to that topic. So it really is just what we talked about earlier. It’s the give. It is showing that you are. You can see in people’s LinkedIn posts or in their social media if they are somewhat of value or not value, but of substance. If what they are putting out is meaty and helpful, then people are going to gravitate towards those folks more than someone who’s just very surface level. So, again, intention and giving, giving something that is of value to the group, um, and making offers. You know, if it’s, if it is a business, something she’s got this niche that she’s working on, you know, in this association or in this group or whatever she’s in, it can be like. You know, I would love to, I’m open to mentoring or I’m open to helping someone who’s just trying to break into this, this environment, because you know someone who’s just trying to break into this environment, because you know what do they say the rising tide floats all boats. So, yeah, to be helpful to the ones that are coming up behind. Embracing Your Authentic Self in Business Gloria Grace: I like that. That’s very good. How has your approach to connection evolved as your own business has grown? Jen Fort: I think, embracing who I am because I can be a little quirky, I can be a little loud, I can be a little funny, I can be off the cuff, I can say things and put my foot in the mouth and I think in the beginning I thought I had to be somebody a little bit more, polished, a little bit more. And, having come off, I you know, I rose up through the ranks no college education. So when I was unexpectedly departed from my last company, there was a lot of you know. Oh, my gosh, what am I going to do? I don’t have this piece of paper that everyone else has, everyone else has, and I kind of had to come to terms with the knowledge that I have from all these years of working. That was my, that was my education. So I had to just kind of turn the cube and think about something a little differently and just getting comfortable with I don’t have to be like everybody else, I don’t have to be polished, I don’t have to have the everyone that has the PhDs and the MBAs and all this education. Great, love it for you, super smart. There’s a place for those people, but there’s also a place for the people that have learned through experience and have figured it out on their own, and I always say especially related to wisdom and warnings. I’m like the most. Some of the smartest people I’ve ever met have never been to college. They’ve never stepped foot in a boardroom. It’s common sense. It’s learning on the street. It’s getting scrappy, being in the trenches, learning from other people and then sharing that the lessons that they’ve learned. So I think it’s just getting comfortable with you. Don’t have to be like everybody else. You just do your thing and people will gravitate towards you for who you are. Gloria Grace: Absolutely. That is what I teach as well. I have something called the LOVE method, which is that love is an acronym and V is value your uniqueness, you know. Jen Fort: Love it. Gloria Grace: And I like to say don’t be afraid to let your freak flag fly, you know, and so I’m glad that you’re doing that, that you came to that realization, because, yeah, especially, you know, if you are trying to be someone that you’re not, then when you do, maybe then finally connect with someone and then you start letting your guard down and you start acting like yourself, then then one of two things is going to happen. Connect yeah, yeah, they’re going to be either like um, I don’t, yeah, I don’t know you, and it’s like, and now you’ve totally turned me off, or like, okay, well, all right, I guess we can still, you know, connect, but it but it’s like all over again yeah, yeah, you’ve undermined the authenticity, you’ve undermined all of that human connection that you’ve been, that you’ve been working at, and you just you can undermine it so quickly if you try to be somebody that you’re not. Wisdom and Warnings: Learning from Life’s Milestones Gloria Grace: Yeah, absolutely. Now you mentioned, and when we first, before we got started with the podcast, I was like, okay, I want to that name of your business, in which I think I kind of have an idea why you called it that way. But I would love to you know, since it says Wisdom and Warnings, so I can see that the wisdom that are going to come up, but maybe what are the warnings? So what prompted you to call it that? Jen Fort: So Wisdom and Warning warnings is my passion project. I for 12, 14 years. I love talking to people and learning their stories, learning the lessons that they’ve learned the hard way and sharing. So over the over these years, I I’m constantly, every day, I’m learning things about people. These wisdom nuggets it’s what should you do and what should you not do. It’s like I want to learn from the things that someone did and was successful, but I also want to learn from their mistakes so I don’t make them. So that’s kind of where the wisdom and warnings comes in. And you know, over the 12-14 years I’ve my library of wisdom is I think it’s over, close to or over, 8,000 nuggets. And what I’ve my library of wisdom is I think it’s over, close to or over, 8,000 nuggets. And what I’ve done is you know that part of my, my passion project is I have them into life milestone categories and that’s the book series that I started when I got, you know, let go from my last job is there’s so much wisdom in. And I think that the book that I two that I just launched Tips from the Quad and Let them Fly are all about Tips from the Quad is the wisdom for the new college student, all the mistakes we made with my son, because I never went to college, I didn’t know that the tuition bills were mailed to to the child, not me. So all these little things that I had no idea, and so they are now in the book tips from the quad, and that’s 365 nuggets of wisdom for the new college student, so you don’t have to kind of deluge all this information to your kid before they leave. And the other book, the Companion Let them Fly, is all the wisdom from the parents of the college students. So it’s just all about learning from others and then sharing that so other people can maybe avoid some mistakes. Gloria Grace: Very good, that’s awesome. What Are You Curious About Right Now? All right, we’re going to change gears just slightly as we’re nearing the end of our time here, because I love asking my guests this. When we have the time, we have an opportunity. So what are you curious about right now? Jen Fort: Oh, what am I curious about? I am curious about the next right step. The next right step it’s when you, when you make a, a big pivot in your life, like I’ve made over the past two years, I feel like the world’s my oyster and there’s so many things that I’m interested in, but I know that I need to make the next right step. So I’m just curious about so much in this realm of authorship and encouragement and coaching and and engaging with other people. I’m just so curious about where it is. Where does life, where’s life taken me in the next couple of years? And it’s through conversations with people like yourself and just from all different areas, just learning about and then, whatever the thing is, it’s going to hit me, it’ll hit me and it’ll happen, but I’m just really curious about what’s next. Gloria Grace: I love that and it’s funny. I was actually on a training. I’m in a group who were helping us to make sure that we are maximizing our LinkedIn presence, were helping us to make sure that we are maximizing our LinkedIn presence and she was talking about actually using AI to help you figure out your clear next right steps. Jen Fort: So I’ve got an exercise for you. Gloria Grace: So I love that. That is so good. Jen Fort: I do. I do use I was going to say I do use AI quite a bit in my career transition Real quick. I have people do what I call the three buckets exercise. It’s super clear on what do you love doing, what are you super good at, what are your values and priorities. And then you can go into like a chat GPT and if it is for job search, give it the persona You’re a career strategist with 20 years experience. Give me 10 jobs or careers that leverage the following and it is just amazing what comes up, because nowadays it’s, I believe, it’s about what fits me, as opposed to me trying to shoehorn myself into something, that it’s just the the advent of AI and how prevalent it is. It just kind of helps get outside of your own head and gives you ideas that you would have never thought of. Gloria Grace: Oh, absolutely, yeah, yeah. And that’s what I love about it best is that idea generation. You know there’s so many people are so worried about it. You know replacing humans, but I think we can still befriend it and have it be a tool for us to use as opposed to, you know, totally replacing. So that’s so cool. Be Open to Life’s Possibilities Is there anything else that I didn’t ask you about or that I should have, or any other last point you’d like to make? Jen Fort: Last point I would just love to say be open to the possibilities. You know, when life throws you a curveball, you don’t know what three years down the road is going to look like. Just be open to declaring like what are you interested in, what lights you on fire, and then be open to how it presents itself to you. I would have never expected that I’d be in this position two years ago. I was like you’re crazy, but I think that unexpected departure was probably long overdue. The universe will kick you in the butt and send you in the direction that you need to go, and then you just have to be open to identifying it and catching it. Go along for the ride, friends. Gloria Grace: Yep, absolutely. Oh yeah, Been there, done that. Yep, I can relate. Connect With Jen Fort All right if someone who’s been enjoying this conversation today would like to learn more about you. Where can people go? Jen Fort: You can just head up my website. It’s jen-fort.com or Wisdom and Warnings. Instagram Facebook website Wisdom and Warnings. Gloria Grace: Okay, very good, and that’s Jen, with one N. Jen Fort: Jen with one N yeah, because we only need one of me. Gloria Grace: I love it. Well, thank you so much for being here today. I really I enjoyed our conversation and learned a lot from you. And yeah, I want to remember that video tip folks. Yes. So it’s memorable and to follow up and have people remember you. I think is so important. Jen Fort: Awesome. Well, thanks for having me. It was a great conversation, thanks. Closing Thoughts: Subscribe and Share Gloria Grace: Thank you, and I do want to thank all of you for listening and for watching today. I hope you did get as much value as I did, and if you’re not subscribed to the podcast yet, I hope you will on your favorite podcast platform. Or you can also, if you’ve been watching this on YouTube, you can subscribe to my YouTube channel at GloriaGraceRand. And I think that’s going to do it. So until next time, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and connect and engage authentically.      

What if the key to finding purpose after 50 wasn’t about doing more, but about being still? In this soulful conversation, I sit down with Larry Weingarten, author of The Philosopher’s Wrench, to explore how stillness, curiosity, and perspective can transform not only how we work but how we live. Larry’s story — part contractor, part philosopher — reveals how fixing what’s “broken” on the outside often begins with quiet repair on the inside. Show Notes | Transcript You’ll hear practical and profound insights on: Why stillness is a radical act of self-leadership after 50 How perspective can turn life’s breakdowns into breakthroughs What intentional living really looks like when you stop chasing and start listening Larry also shares lessons from his cat – namely, what our feline friends understand about life that humans have forgotten. If you’ve built, led, and served, and now feel called to redefine fulfillment on your own terms, this episode is your invitation to pause, breathe, and come home to yourself. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Larry Website: www.larryweingarten.com Book: The Philosopher’s Wrench: Using Your Creativity, Heart & Tools to Fix the World Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Host: Gloria Grace, Founder of Align to Shine Academy Guest: Larry Weingarten, Author of “The Philosopher’s Wrench” Episode Focus: How problem-solving mindsets can heal spirits and transform businesses Episode Introduction Gloria Grace: Namaste. Are you tired of seeing problems as roadblocks when they could actually be doorways to deeper wisdom? Well, stay tuned as I chat with a master problem solver who’s going to share how the same mindset that fixes broken things can actually help to heal our spirits and businesses, too. Welcome to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, the founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. My guest today is Larry Winegarden, author of “The Philosopher’s Wrench.” He’s a contractor who’s been working with his hands for over 50 years, learning about fixing problems—both technical and human. He enjoys helping people and animals and respects the land that raised him. From Physical Tools to Life Tools Gloria: I’m really interested to talk with you because this has been a fascinating book so far. You’re not the typical contractor I’ve encountered—you’re much deeper. I’d love for you to share how you started making that connection between fixing physical objects and fixing human issues and emotional things. Larry: Well, if I look at tools, the word “tools,” what comes to mind first is a pipe wrench, metal tools, power tools. But there are bigger tools if you think of it. Hope, particularly—very powerful tool. If you look at what hope can do versus what a pipe wrench can do? Hope can save lives. I’ve used it to prevent suicides. It’s a very powerful tool. Acceptance is a tool. Being present or presence is a tool. So I had to step out of my comfort zone, which was just playing with pipes and metal things, and learn how to be of greater service. That’s where working with the bigger tools has let me do a whole lot more. A Water Heater Story: Doing What’s Right Gloria: Can you share a story about maybe fixing something like a water heater that taught you an unexpected lesson about life? Larry: There was a client who had a gas-fired water heater in his crawl space. It was unsafe in so many ways: Not properly vented—the vent pipe just went up against wooden floor joists and stopped The temperature and pressure relief valve had been capped off Not properly earthquake strapped (I’m in California where this is important) There were at least three different ways this water heater could kill the owner. I wouldn’t leave the place until I had fixed all of that. I wasn’t going to expose him to that risk. He wound up getting mad at me for basically not allowing him to be killed by his water heater. Gloria: Why do you think he got mad? Larry: Plumbers have a bad reputation—”what can I do to increase the bill?” But I like to be the plumber that goes around and saves people money by making their water heaters last five times the normal lifetime. I think he was scared, and justifiably perhaps. He may have been burned in the past by somebody else. Using Hope as a Tool: Preventing Suicides Larry: I was part of an investment situation where I lost a lot of money, and a number of other people lost all of their retirements. They were seriously talking about suicide because they had no idea how they could keep going. So I gave them different perspectives to play with, different points of view, and said, “How about if we did this or went down this road?” I know for certain that I prevented four suicides in that case because I helped them figure out a way to see hope. Hope is a really powerful tool. The Power of Quiet Mind and Business Success Gloria: You mention in your book about the power of openness and a quiet mind. How can our audience—women entrepreneurs who watch this show—apply those principles to business challenges? Larry: I try to find at least 30 minutes a day to have quiet—meaning no outside noises, influences, or electronics. But also making my mind still, letting my subconscious come up. Getting rid of all the noise so that what’s been hiding in my subconscious can come up and be seen. My best ideas show up when I quiet my mind. Gloria: How did you develop this practice? Larry: As a five-year-old, I was told that my mom would very likely die of cancer. Before that, I was just a happy kid. After that, I couldn’t even speak—I had to write notes to people. I was so anxious. I learned how to speak again by figuring out almost a little self-hypnosis trick of making things quiet inside so I could get past that block. Once I could do that, I thought, “Let’s see if I can be quiet for longer.” I found that if I could get that same quiet and expand it out for half an hour, all kinds of neat things happened. Things I forgot to do would pop up. My subconscious would present whatever I’d been missing—whether new business ideas or who I should be getting in touch with. From Law to Trades: Following Logic Larry: My father was a lawyer and really wanted his sons all to be lawyers. I saw what a messy trade that is—it involves people who make no sense at all. No logic. Everything is different. You can’t trust what judges do. I thought physical things I’m pretty good at, and I like to deal with physics. It’s concrete—you know what’s going on. It all makes sense if you take the time to understand it. I can see corrosion processes in my mind or heat transfer going on. It just all makes perfect sense. Living Off the Grid: Efficiency and Independence Gloria: You live off the grid, which is something my daughter used to talk about doing. What’s that been like for you, and how does it inform what you do in your life? Larry: I built this house you see around me and finished it roughly 20 years ago. It’s off grid. The way to make that happen is to make it really energy efficient. This house uses about a tenth as much energy per square foot as the standard American home. I would have had to run 2/3 of a mile underground power line to get to the house—that would have been roughly $75,000 at the time. Instead, I spent about $5,000 to build a small solar system with battery storage. I saved $70,000, and my power doesn’t go out. The going rate for housing in my area was around $250 per square foot. This house cost about $100 per square foot to build. Being efficient and off grid can actually cost substantially less. Practical Energy Efficiency Tips Gloria: How can we start moving towards being more self-sufficient and energy efficient? Larry: Start with what you can do with your own house to make it much more efficient. [Shows thermal camera image] This is a cat walking on carpet, taken with a thermal camera—a little plug-in device you can add to your phone called a FLIR one. Those footprints you see show how sensitive it is to heat. Imagine looking at your house with a camera like that, both inside and outside. You can see where the heat is leaking out and tell exactly what needs to be fixed—whether it’s air leaks, thermal bridges, or whatever. For apartment dwellers, there’s been a movement called “Guerrilla Solar” where you put your own photovoltaic panels in a window or on a porch and create your own power. Also explore whether your power company offers energy audits and tool lending programs. Life Lessons from Cats Gloria: You mention cats in your book, and I can see you’re a cat lover like me. What lessons have you learned from being around cats? Larry: I have a cat named Prince who teaches me all kinds of things. Whatever he needs shows up for him. If he’s hungry, food shows up. If he wants to play, everything is a cat toy. Life is real simple for him. If he wants my attention, he zigzags in front of my feet as I’m walking. I’ve never tripped over him or kicked him—I’m careful that way. He acts on what can go right. Humans act on what can go wrong. We think the saber-tooth tiger is lurking around the corner, but Prince knows his basic premise: “What can go right? I want the human’s attention, so I’m going to zigzag in front of him.” Always works. I’ve rescued kittens that were like a month old, bottle-fed them every three hours. These turned into cats that behaved like dogs—they followed me around, wanted to be with me, on me, on my shoulders. If you can get to them really young, they’ll bond with you completely. The Art of Asking Good Questions Gloria: You talk in your book about asking good questions. How does one develop this skill? Larry: I think if you can put yourself in the person you’re talking to—if you can put yourself in their shoes and try to get their perspective first—then consider how that would affect the question you’re going to ask. I remember my mother asked me a really good question when I wanted to do art as a child. She was an art major in college, so she’d had time to think about this. She asked me, “Will you be able to make a living?” I had to think about that. It seemed the only artists that ever made money were already long dead. Very good question asked at a very good time. Perspective as a Problem-Solving Tool Gloria: We’ve talked about perspective several times. In our divided world, people seem unwilling to look at things from others’ perspectives. What do you think about that? Larry: I don’t think we’ve been this divided as a nation since the Civil War, and we may be heading towards another one. But perspective is an incredibly useful tool for troubleshooting. How many different points of view can you bring to bear on some problem? I deal with plumbing that messes up, so I have to look at it from multiple angles: How is heat transfer going on? How are corrosion processes working? How does water flow through it? How does the owner see it? What are they capable of doing? The more perspectives I can bring to any problem, the more likelihood I can solve it. I’ve been the eighth plumber on jobs where everyone else walked off. You can’t assume anything. I once found a water heater plumbed backwards because I didn’t assume the insulated pipe was the hot line—I tested it. What’s Next: Book Two and Current Curiosity Gloria: I noticed this says “Book One.” Are you working on Book Two? Larry: Yes, Book Two is essentially written—we’re editing it now. When I wrote this book, I had way too many things to fit without making it overly thick. Ideas keep coming to me steadily, even this morning. They just won’t quit knocking at the door. Gloria: What are you curious about right now? Larry: I’m a hot water nerd, and there’s this big push in the US to electrify things and get rid of gas-burning appliances. Heat pump water heaters are taking off, but there’s a dilemma no one has really addressed. Heat pump water heaters work like a fridge—they move heat from one place to another. If not installed correctly, they can cool the space they’re in so much that you start getting condensation developing in or behind walls. This creates mold and makes people sick. I’m working on better installation and training practices to avoid giving heat pumps a black eye, because they’re actually a good solution. Water heating is the second biggest energy user in the US, and in efficient homes, it’s the biggest. Teaching and Mentoring: Building Future Problem Solvers Gloria: You’re very active in mentoring folks. Can you talk about that? Larry: I’ve been teaching at a local school for disadvantaged youth. Last year we built an 800-square-foot house and competed in the Orange County Sustainability Decathlon against colleges and universities from around the world. We were the only high school, and we won. The kids went from mumbling at the ground in face-to-face conversations to public speaking—huge change in their ability and self-confidence. I’m also teaching them financial literacy and how to mix it with fix-it skills. I gave them a process: Start by learning to fix things, make a business of it, put money together, buy a wrecked house, fix it up instead of tearing it down, rent it out, hold onto it, then get more. I gave them a plan where in 10 years they could add roughly a million dollars to their net worth. Simple Practice to Start Today Gloria: What’s one simple practice our listeners could start today to develop more of this philosopher’s wrench mindset? Larry: What comes to mind first is that quiet time. It doesn’t need to be any specific time of day, but if you can set aside 30 minutes to simply exclude all the noise from your head and see what your subconscious gives you—that might be one of the most potent things to start with. I also like being curious about basically everything. I like to know how everything works. If I understand the properties of everything from a physical point of view, I can use them and get away with it. How to Connect with Larry Winegarden Book: “The Philosopher’s Wrench” available on Amazon Website: Larryweingarten.com (contact form available) Episode Wrap-up Gloria: Thank you so much for being with us today and enlightening us about tools—mindset and otherwise. Larry: You have made it fun to be here. Thank you. Gloria: Thank you all for watching and listening. I hope you received value from our conversation. You can find me on social media, and if you enjoyed this episode and you’re listening on Spotify or Apple Podcasts, I’d love a review. Until next time, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically. Key Takeaways Expand your tool concept: Hope, acceptance, and presence are powerful tools for problem-solving Practice quiet time: 30 minutes daily of mental stillness can unlock subconscious wisdom Multiple perspectives: The more viewpoints you bring to a problem, the better your solutions Energy efficiency first: Make systems efficient before adding power sources Never assume: Test and verify rather than making assumptions based on appearances Ask better questions: Put yourself in others’ shoes to ask more meaningful questions Curiosity as a superpower: Understanding how everything works gives you creative problem-solving abilities This episode of Live Love Engage was hosted by Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, empowering women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence.  

You’re sitting across from a potential client or a new acquaintence at a networking meeting when they make the most casual invitation: “So, tell me about yourself.” And your mind goes blank. Not because you lack accomplishments. Not because your life hasn’t been full, complex, and worth talking about. But because somewhere along the way, you stopped knowing how to answer that question without listing your roles, your résumé, or what you do for others. Dr. Dianne Olvera has spent decades studying why so many people, especially women who’ve spent years filling a variety of supportive roles, struggle to define themselves in midlife. What she’s discovered and shares during our interview will make you rethink everything about how you communicate with others AND yourself. Show Notes | Transcript This episode is about reclaiming your voice that has gotten buried under decades of being told what to do, how to respond, and who to be. Dianne shares the subtle communication patterns that either drain your energy or fill your cup. And why the words you use (and the ones used on you) have shaped your reality more than you may have realized. You’ll discover: Why self-awareness isn’t selfish, and how asking yourself simple questions can rebuild confidence that external achievements never could The eye contact technique that shifts power dynamics instantly, whether you’re dealing with a difficult person or standing up for yourself How the words you heard as a child are still running the show in your business, your relationships, and your internal dialogue Why “people become our words” and how to use this knowledge to transform the way you show up for clients, partners, and yourself The generalist vs. specialist framework that will help you stop butting heads with people who drive you crazy and start leveraging their strengths instead How to have empathetic conversations with teens (or anyone, really) that don’t devolve into lectures or door-slamming by flipping the script on who does the talking Dianne doesn’t deal in spiritual bypassing or toxic positivity. She’s spent years as a diplomat navigating volatile conversations with controversial figures, raised a family across continents, and built a practice helping everyone from toddlers to executives learn how to define themselves, instead of being defined by others. If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation feeling smaller or caught yourself apologizing for emotions you have every right to feel, this episode might just be the permission slip you didn’t know you needed to start speaking differently. To yourself, first and then, to everyone else. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Dianne Website: drdianneolvera.com Book: “The Power of Connection: Understanding Individual Differences to Uplift and Empower” Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Communication Strategies That Build Real Connection After 50 Full Episode Transcript Introduction: Why Some Conversations Energize While Others Drain Us Gloria Grace Namaste. Have you ever wondered why some conversations leave you energized while others drain your spirit completely? Well, today we are diving into the incredible power of connection that can actually transform your business relationships and personal relationships and maybe, maybe even in the process, bring some more abundance into your life. But first, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. If this is your first time joining us, I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. And joining us in just a moment is Dr. Diane Olvera, and she is an amazing lady. She’s an educator, an author, an expert in empowered education whose work was shaped by years of living in Argentina and Mexico during political and economic instability. And she’s got a book called the Power of Connection, Understanding Individual Differences to uplift and empower. And it combines over four decades of personal experience with scholarly insight, providing practical tools for fostering more meaningful and effective relationships. And I know we can all use some of that. So without further ado, I’m going to bring her up and welcome you officially to Live Love Engage. Oh, good grief. I cannot hear you all of a sudden. That is strange. Oh, there we go. Dr. Dianne Olvera Thank you. It’s pleasure to be here. From Stewardess to Diplomat: Dr. Olvera’s Journey Gloria Grace Well, I am happy to have you here. And I. Yeah, you know, going over some of your bio, you certainly have led an interesting life. And I’m curious to know what actually first sparked your interest in really studying the power of connection and communication. Dr. Dianne Olvera Well, I moved to Argentina. I married an Argentine. I was a stewardess with TWA. And he that marriage didn’t work out, but I stayed because we had a son. And then I was also teaching at the American School, and I met this lovely man who was a diplomat, and we both became diplomats for the American Embassy. And I had an opportunity to meet people in very high places that were sometimes very controversial. And I just couldn’t understand how on one side they could be doing very devious acts, and on the other side, they could be speaking to me, and I could be completely blown over by how wonderful they were. So when we completed our work, I also needed to use a lot of my new strategies with these people because sometimes you did have some controversial issues that needed to be discussed. And the only way that we could do that would be to be very honest and open with each other. And there were times that you had to really maintain your integrity. So after we left Argentina, then we went to Mexico and became diplomats there, and they were having an economic crisis and so when you’re a diplomat, you meet people from all over the world, and that’s how. I don’t know if you’ve seen, you know, Netflix the Diplomat, but it’s. It’s a way that we can create companionship and friendship across lines, and sometimes we may need each other in the future. So there, again, that involved a lot of important conversations that sometimes could be very volatile. Overcoming a Strict Upbringing to Find Better Communication Methods So when I got back to the States, you know, I came from a family where we were very. They were very strict, and we weren’t allowed to talk. I got soaked behind my front teeth. If I answered back, I got the belt, I got the whip. So I finally said, there’s got to be a way that we can learn to connect with anyone and be able to do justice and empower them and help these people be able to feel that they are worthy of our interactions. And so I spent the next 12 years in graduate school. I got a couple doctorates in bilingual special education and cultural differences. And I used much of my time after graduation to teaching college students. But then I also had a private practice, and that’s where I developed my strategies on how anyone, from the most neurodiverse to the most gifted to the youngest, let’s say two years old up to my age and more, how we could learn to talk with each other. It literally improved my marriage. My husband and I had a child. He was in middle school, and it improved our relationship with him. He is now an adult, and he uses it all the time in his work with his family. It’s very powerful. And what he said to me the other day is, mom, this is very subtle. You don’t know. People don’t realize what you’re doing. But you are able to literally turn relationships around just by the power of how you speak with them and how you look at them, how you use your body language. The Modern Communication Crisis: Why We’re Not Listening Gloria Grace Wow, that’s a really good thing to have. And I tell you, it’s so important. Seems like even more these days where we’ve got so many. We’re so caught up in indifferences and not listening to one another and not just wanting to, you know, everybody wants to be heard. We all want to be seen and want to be heard, but we don’t necessarily then want to extend that to the other person because they feel the same way. And we can’t be able to have a good, you know, communication if we’re not willing to listen and let them be seen and heard as well. Dr. Dianne Olvera Yes. The Power of Eye Contact: A Diplomat’s Secret Weapon Gloria Grace I want to get into your strategies in a moment, but I wonder if you could share with us first maybe a story about a time when effective communication really transformed a challenging situation. Dr. Dianne Olvera Oh boy, there have been so many. One time as a diplomat I was taken aside by someone and they’re always testing you to see if how vulnerable you are to receive and to provide information. And I was very uncomfortable. And so I as this person spoke with me I lowered my eyes and then when the moment was right I raised my eyes. I looked him straight in the eye and I said we’re done here. And I walked away. And I realized after going to graduate school that our eyes have power. And so I mean I use it all the time. I use it in my graduate classes. It was funny because one day I actually I was teaching a law class and one of my students was providing some very interesting information and I was listening to him and then I looked him straight in the eye and I said tell me more. And he just apologized. I am so sorry. And I said why are you sorry? I want to know more. The Self-Awareness Crisis in Universities and Workplaces But then I posed it to my students and I said why are you fearful to really stand up to me and to define self? Well, fast forward. We are now finding in the university that our students cannot do not have self awareness. We’re finding this in the workplace that people are coming into the workplace requesting jobs but when you ask them to just tell me about yourself they can’t. I did that in the graduates class and I said don’t tell me your name, don’t tell me your background, just tell me who you are. No one could do it, not one person. Gloria Grace Wow. Well let’s, let’s stick with this topic because this is intriguing to me. So why, I guess why is it number one why is it so important to have that self awareness and why, why do you think so many, you know, younger people are unable to do it? Why Self-Awareness Matters: The Foundation of Leadership Dr. Dianne Olvera You know and it’s, it actually I think has started because we’re really good parents and we really want our children to do well. So when we are at home as a parent, what do we do? We tell them what to do and when they don’t do it we remind them what they were supposed to do and then even when they do do it, what do we do? We tell them why we reminded them what they had to do. Gloria Grace So who’s doing all the talking? Building Self-Awareness Starting at Age Two Dr. Dianne Olvera You see so when I started doing this and I tell you from 2 years old on because before that the brain hasn’t completed its neuro closure and so I just start with questions, what color is this Block. What color is this block? There’s a blue box there. Where would you put the blue peg or the blue block? And they’ll say, oh, in the blue box. Great. How did that make you feel? Happy. What does happy mean to you? And it really starts making them think about self. Now you keep doing this, and you don’t have to always start at 2 years old. You can start at 45 or 50 or 80, but you start working with people that way. What we found is when a person is able to define self, they then start to hear themselves become aware of their attributes and even their deficits. And then this builds confidence because you know who you are. I mean, I can say, yeah, I may be really good at this, but I’m not really good at maybe decorating or cooking, but that’s okay because I have an attribute that I feel good about. And so we can then open our conversations. So self esteem. Self awareness provides self esteem, which then becomes self. The ability to become leaders. Because children go back and start using these strategies with their friends. Their friends start seeing them pull them up, not themselves, but they pull others up. Now we have leaders, and those leaders go on to become very, very popular, not because they are anything better than the person beside them, but because now they have a sense of self. Valuing Your Uniqueness: Your Strength is Someone Else’s Weakness Gloria Grace I love that. And it’s, it’s, it’s very. It’s a different way of looking at something that I teach as well, because I teach something called the, the love method or love. And the V is value your uniqueness. Dr. Dianne Olvera]: Yes. Gloria Grace And right. That we, we don’t always value. You know, I think sometimes, you know, you know, we do know, like, where our weaknesses are sometimes, or maybe, maybe, maybe we don’t. But we also don’t always value our strengths, and we tend to downplay them. And, but our strength is somebody else’s weakness. And so we, we need to be able to, you know, own that, because then somebody else will be like, oh, I’m so glad that you know how to do that, because I don’t. And that’s how, you know, as. Especially as entrepreneurs, that’s how we can help other people by really saying, yeah, this is what I do, and this is how I can help you. So I love that. And, and you explain that so well. So thank you for that. Practical Communication Strategies for Entrepreneurs Gloria Grace I, I do want to go back to, you know, talking about. And you did that great example about your eyes, you know, looking down and then looking up. So what else can our listeners do today? What other practice could they implement that could start helping them to, let’s say, an entrepreneur, maybe strengthen their connection with a client. We Become Our Words: The Devastating Power of Negative Labels Dr. Dianne Olvera You know, that people become our words. I’m going to give you a negative, and I’ll give you a positive. There was a young man who was in a special ed classroom, and every time we had a meeting, his mother would come in and say, he was born bad. He was born bad. And it was right before summer, and it was our last meeting. And he looked at his mom and he said, you have said this all my life. And he made some horrible remarks. Well, when school started the next term, I asked where he was, and the principal said, oh, he took a woman to the desert, killed her, and is now in jail. The Five-Year Impact of One Word: “Stupid” And I’ll tell you, even more subtle, A young person was in fifth grade, and the teacher said, now, that was a stupid thing to say. Five years later, I had him in my private practice, and everything was stupid. That was stupid. Boy, this is stupid. Oh, man, I hate this book. It’s stupid. And so I said, please reflect back to any time that that word made any impact to you. And he thought. And he said, oh, my gosh. Oh, my goodness. When I was in fifth grade, that was said to me. And I said, do you realize you’ve carried this in your heart for all these years? And had we not caught it, where would you be today? Now, a businessman. Family, wonderful family, wonderful kids. And all because we caught the power of words. Using Words to Transform: A Grief Story So if you’re an entrepreneur, you can use your words to completely turn relationships around. And it’s very subtle. My. My husband died in 2020 of cancer. And I live in an over 55 neighborhood. And I went to a grief meeting, and in the grief meeting, I met this man who had a similar background to mine, and his wife died two months after my husband. Now, his wife was very short, so his physical posture was always like this, which made him look older, but also his breathing and everything. So he said to me, hey, would you do me a favor? Every time you see me bent over, would you please tell me? So I did. And he would walk away. He’d go into another room. He felt devastated. So then I tried my. My way. And I just. Every time I saw him standing straight, I’d say, well, aren’t you tall? I didn’t know you were this tall. Isn’t this lovely? And he started to become my words. When we would walk down the hallway, people would go, dude, have you grown? So they reinforced just what I was trying to help him do. Creating Stories We Live Into: The Impact of Childhood Experiences Gloria Grace I love that. That’s great examples. And it’s So, I mean, sad about the, about the other ones, but. Yeah, living up to or living down to, I should say sometimes those, the words that we hear and it, and we do really create stories that we sort of live into. And I know I’ve, I’ve, I think I’ve even shared on the podcast before that I had an experience when I was in second grade where I was, I was laughed at and for trying to show affection to someone. I was. They he told on me during show and tell, you know, and so I carried that, you know, with me. And I think I, I made, I think what I made it mean was, you know, be careful who you really are close to because it could, you know, bite you. And, and it took finally doing some work and doing, you know, with, with someone at a, at an experience where I realized maybe I like, misinterpreted, you know, maybe, you know, yeah, the class reacted that way, but maybe that wasn’t what he had intended. He might have been actually bragging about it, but I just, you know, took the, you know, because I didn’t have very good self esteem at the time anyway as a little kid growing up in a kind of tense household. So it’s, yeah, it’s so important. Dr. Dianne Olvera Today. And you were the mother of a child that that happened to. You know, what you could have said is, I’m so lucky to have a daughter who is so kind and emotional with people. That’s an attribute. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera And maybe at this age you’re going to feel that it’s not really appreciated, but people need empathy. And you’re empathetic. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera So blessed to have you as a daughter. My words. And that you start to become those words and you can use those words in. To defend yourself the next day. You know what, guys? I’m empathetic. Empathetic. I don’t care what you have to say. Helping Kids Combat Bullying: Strategies for Parents Gloria Grace Yeah. Oh, goodness. You know, I’m going to ask you about this. And I know even though our audience is entrepreneurs, but they may also be parents of possibly even like teenagers right now. And I know that we are living in a time where, I mean, I was bullied when I was in middle school. Dr. Dianne Olvera Yeah. I was fat Foster. Gloria Grace Well, yeah. And I was, you know, it was. I grew up in Michigan and so they would, you know, I would wear a hat in the wintertime and they’d love to like snatch the hat off my head and start tossing it around, you know, and I would get so frustrated and I’d go, you know, and then, and even when I was younger I mean, I think I had an older brother and sister, and they kind of called me a crybaby. Dr. Dianne Olvera And. Gloria Grace And because I would come home crying because somebody was picking on me. Dr. Dianne Yeah. Gloria Grace And. And I’m just even having an interesting flash now to again about the power of words, because I was. I was actually in an interview earlier today where I was the guest on someone else’s podcast, and I was retelling a story of how when I was working with the coach and I started crying, and I was like, oh, you know, I started apologizing and, you know, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be crying, you know, and he’s like, no, go ahead and cry. Well, now I’m also thinking back, because I was called a crybaby as a kid, and I know my brothers and sister didn’t, you know, really mean to, you know, hurt me with that. They were trying to toughen me up. But it also made me feel uncomfortable about crying. Long story short, what would you tell parents today about how to help their kids who are being bullied, like on the Internet and things like that, because it’s so bad and we’re having so many commit suicide and things like that. So what. What, one strategy, one or two strategies maybe, would you offer that they could help help them out? Using Eye Contact and Questions to Deflect Bullies Dr. Dianne Olvera Well, first of all, it’s helping them become aware of who they are, who is self, who are, who am I, and what are my attributes. You know, Carrie Sprug, when she was five years old, came into my room and said, hey, I’m going to the Olympics one day. And I said, thank God, because you bounce all over the classroom. And I’m so glad because your mommy finally took my advice and go with me go into gymnastics. So if you start at home quietly picking up on little nuances as entrepreneurs, if I wanted to sell a product to another person, I would find out what are that person’s strengths and weaknesses just by chatting with them. And then use the power of your words to pick that person up to let them know that you need my product, because my product will literally turn you around in whatever endeavor that you’re looking at. But as for teenagers, that’s where we start to talk about. If there it’s a visual, then it might be a way to use their eyes. So they’re talking to a friend, and the friend is really cutting them down. And they can usually be sitting like this. Their eyes are down and they’re really frustrated. Then they look straight at the camera, they look straight at this person, and they say, was that Comfortable for you. What was your goal and what did I say? They don’t know what to say. Gloria Grace Right. Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera If you really knew me and if you really knew what you wanted from our friendship, would you have. Now I don’t say don’t do that because that becomes our parents. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera Turn it around. Would you have continued to do that? Oh, no, I’m sorry. I really want to be your friend. It’s just that sometimes you really get on my nerves. Okay. So how could you do that? So that I can learn from you and we can be comfortable. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera [And then it completely turns relationships. I use it all the time. You know, even when you’re shopping or when you’re in a confrontation with your. With friends, you know, how would you change this? What would we do differently? And you know, if you don’t have self awareness, it’s really hard. You actually take it more to heart than maybe we would at our age. And so just looking at them, not getting angry, just using your eyes to show that you. When you look at somebody, they feel. Felt. And even when you’re like shopping somewhere and you’re. I’m. And I’m. And I’m ready to leave the shopping area, I look straight at the person that checked me out and I say, hey, thanks a lot. You look a little tired today. And my goodness, I mean, I’ll have a 15 minute conversation that I didn’t even expect to have just because they felt. Felt. Parenting Tips: Building Maturity Through Simple Acknowledgment Gloria Grace Yeah, I love that. Dr. Dianne Olvera I’m sorry. So. So yeah, I’m sorry if I you. Is that okay if I go on? Gloria Grace Yeah. Oh, yes, yes, please. Dr. Dianne Olvera Parents, we do this away from the mic. We do it away from any of these video experiences. We start with the little things. You know, hey, thanks for picking your shoes up. You’re getting more mature. Thanks. That’s it. You don’t go into, well, this is what you should have done. And I’m so glad you did it. Kids hate it. Kids also hate the fact that you do everything for them. I was shocked, but this is something I’ve had over 40 years of talking with kids and they want to be heard, they want to be known, and they want to have a part in your life. When they are not asked to do things and required, expected, then they feel that you don’t love them. Creating Workplace Rules Collaboratively: The Key to Respect Dr. Dianne Olvera When you start to. And if you’re going to make. And this would be. If you’re an entrepreneur and you have a group of people working with you. This is another thing that I find in the workplace. If you’re going to be making rolls R U L E S in the office, then please do it with everyone that would be involved in that room. These are. And you can talk about them. These are the things that we need to do. And what would be the repercussions if somebody doesn’t do it? You know, we have to have some of our articles in the mail by 8:15 in the morning. And if you come in at 7:45, what would be the repercussion that we should place on someone who comes in late when we know we have a deadline of getting them in the mail and then let them talk and then say, okay, do you mind if we just write this down? So we write it down, and then when something happens where it’s, you know, 8:45, 7:45, and they come in, hey, what time is it? Oh, 7:45. I should have called. Gloria Grace Mm. Dr. Dianne Olvera So what’s the repercussion? And whatever you all have decided, you know, and say. And you say, okay, so you know what the repercussion is. So. Okay. Now, I hope you, you know. Do you want us to remind you, or are you gonna be okay with doing it yourself? No, I’ll do it myself. Thank you. When they do it, you. You don’t make a big scene. You just say, hey, thanks for coming on board. Thanks for being part of the team again. I really appreciate that. Then you have a relationship that is comfortable because you respect it. Balancing Responsibility: Parent-Child and Boss-Employee Dynamics Gloria Grace Yeah, And I, I will say that. Well, well, let me. Let me ask you this, though, because I, I’m. I just. Knowing how. How I grew up and, and versus being being an employee and, and then also being. Being a business owner and being able. And having to work with, you know, I have had assistance in. In the past and having to figure out what’s the best way to be able to navigate that relationship and making sure that they know what I expect from them and, and what I expect, you know, and then they know what to expect from me. You know, as you’re going here, but, But I was struck by. When you’re talking about how, you know, kids do want to be told what to do, but I think there’s also, though, a line where sometimes there’s too much like, you know, because I, you know, I loved my mom. She was a wonderful lady, but I also felt like a lot of times that I was the parent in that relationship instead, where I had to do a lot of the stuff and then, you know, had some resentment that built over. Over the years that had to, you know, I, I Know now why, and I’ve forgiven her and. And some of this stuff actually served me later. But in the moment, it was very frustrating where it was like, you know, I have to be, you know, the cook and the cleaner and, you know, and everything. And it was, you know, felt put upon. So how do you kind of balance that? Yes, you want to be able to have your kids, you know, be responsible and frankly, your employees as well, versus, you know, that coming off as the tyrant and just, you know, it’s my way or the highway kind of thing even. Open Conversation: Learning from Argentine Culture Dr. Dianne Olvera  Well, when I went to Argentina, I came from a very similar relationship with my parents as you did. I was shocked because people were hugging me. I wasn’t accustomed to being touched like that. And people would tell me to my face what they thought about me, what I was wearing, how. How I came across as the ugly American at first, as probably you would have felt I was. So I wanted to run and go home. And then I thought, they care. They want me to become part of them and to not get bullied or have people say things to me. So they will tell me to my face what they feel, what they think, and I could do the same to them. And I call it open conversation. And in order to find if you really wanted to see this, look for. For Latino Netflix and, you know, put them on in English, obviously, and you will see how often they make eye contact, how often they will maybe touch your shoulder or touch each other, and more than anything, how they use their open conversations. Bringing Honest Feedback Into the Workplace So, yes, if I had a business and my employee came up to me and said something that he felt about this new. The new rule, I would have looked at him and said, gee, I wish you had said that in the meeting when all of us were present. But I appreciate that, and I will bring it up in the next meeting so we can all determine if this new change that you. You’ve suggested is really going to benefit everyone. So it’s open conversation. And sometimes you’re not going to like what you hear, but you’re going to know in front of your face what’s really being said behind your back. And I would rather be able to have everyone around me be open and honest and hear my mistakes and my stupidities to my face and not saying it to each other in a demeaning way. That’s the other issue. We start out kidding each other. Oh, Mary, that was so stupid. And then, you know, oh, yeah, every time we go to lunch, his pockets are so deep, he can’t seem to find his Wallet. And then everybody laughs. So what do we do? We take the speech pattern and we carry it on. How Speech Patterns Saved a Marriage Dr. Dianne Olvera That’s how marriage is. You know, marriage is now are ending at 65. And so I always tell couples when they’re working together, I say, I want you to do two things. I want you to look at each other when you talk, and I want you to measure your speech patterns. So I had a couple that came in and they were ready for divorce. And when they spoke, each one looked straight ahead. Well, the man kept looking at the door. I think he wanted to run away. And they wouldn’t look at each other. And so. And then when they did say something, it was that negative speech pattern. Yep. You’re always doing that. See the way she’s going on and on and on? And so I pointed it out. They hadn’t even realized what they were doing. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera A week later, they came in, they sat on the couch, we discussed things, and the guy said, sex was awesome. I said, well, I don’t think we talked about that. She said, best ever. Were we together last week? Gloria GraceI love that. Dr. Dianne Olvera And they said, no. When we realized how we were talking to each other and we started making eye contact, we realized that there was still a spark and we’re not getting a divorce. Gloria Grace Well, that’s wonderful. Yeah. Understanding Generalists vs. Specialists in the Workplace Dr. Dianne Olvera The other. Can I bring up one that if you want to talk about problems within the workplace. Gloria Grace Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera  Are you familiar with, like, generalists and specialists? Gloria Grace Yeah, Yeah, I think. Yeah. Of. Or at least of. Well, let’s just say even in medicine, there’s someone. A generalist is someone who can handle all types of different issues, whereas a specialist, you know, focuses in on one thing. And I know even entrepreneurs, a lot of times we’re taught to niche, niche down or whatever, you know, and focus in on one area or one type of person, you know, to be that specialist in that thing as opposed to someone who can just help everybody. So that’s kind of what you’re getting at a little bit. Dr. Dianne Olvera A little bit of a different way. Gloria Grace Okay. All right, cool. How People Process Information Differently Dr. Dianne Olvera A generalist. And this is really great in the office, a generalist is a person who likes the bottom line. You know, when you go into so many details, you start seeing the eyes rolling and, you know, looking at their phone. That’s a generalist. So when you work with that person, you give them bottom line. Today we’re going to create a logo for our new product. Bottom line. Right. But then you have that other person who you think they just want a lot of attention, and that’s the person who goes, okay, so are we going to use the colors that we have with the other color scheme of that other logo, or are we replicating a logo that we don’t want those colors with? And then how big do you want it? Do you want the same size? So detail, detail, detail, detail. And they can’t move on with their work until all those details are defined. Otherwise they’re going to keep coming back to you at your desk or wherever you’re at, asking more details. So that’s a specialist. And we actually did this with teachers. When a teacher first came into teacher training, we would look at how do people process information? And so are you a generalist? Are you a specialist? Are you mixed? So let’s say you were a generalist, I was a specialist. And then we go back in for our graduate degrees and we’re in the same class again, we take the test again. You’ll probably come out mixed because you work with so many different types of people. So you had to, without realizing, change the way you speak and you work with these individuals so that your, your work gets done more proficiently. Turning Workplace Rivals Into Partners And so that’s where if you as a boss knew this and you could say, Mary, I love your creativity. I love when you come up with these great picture ideas. Now, I know that you and John may not always get along, but I think John is really going to embellish that beautiful thought that you had. So, John, what do you think about building onto Mary’s idea and putting in all those specifics? Oh, that would be awesome. Now, what could have been rivals or people that they just. They hated each other because they would get on each other’s nerves? One didn’t talk enough and the other one talked too much. These now become working partners that are embellishing the life of each other. Gloria Grace I like that. Yeah, yeah. Because now they’re complementing. They each are folk dealing with their own strengths as opposed to. Yeah. Fighting against each other so that, yeah, they can really complement each other. I like that. Dr. Dianne Olvera But as Mary starts to work with him a little bit longer, she becomes mixed. So he starts to learn that when she talks to him, she needs to talk in more detail. Gloria Grace Right. Dr. Dianne Olvera And in an office, the last thing you want to do is have to be telling somebody over and over and over again. Gloria Grace Yeah. Using Specialists to Handle Details You Don’t Want To Dr. Dianne Olvera Then once they know what you’re expecting of him, you just ask the question, well, when we make our logo, are all the logos the same size? Oh, yeah, they are and thought of that. So what size should we make this logo? The same size. Absolutely. Good idea. Boom, it’s done. The other thing is, you know how we all hate to look at contracts, all the little details of a contract. Well, specialists like those, and they’ll actually. My partner right now is a specialist, and every time I have a contract or even, like, editing my book, he’ll find commas that could have been in the right place and they’re not. So those are subtle ways that, without realizing, you’re getting a lot more work done because you’re utilizing the strength of the people around you. The Role of Empathy in Creating Powerful Connections Gloria Grace Yeah. And that’s so important, and I love that. So I’m going to ask you, because I know and just in doing some of the research and you’re sharing with me a little bit about some of your processes. And I know one of the things you mentioned was you talked about empathy, and I know that’s something that I think is also in. Seems to be in short supply these days. So for someone who may not know, how does empathy play into creating powerful connections? And how can we develop more of it? Leading With Empathy Instead of Judgment Dr. Dianne Olvera You know, this is the easiest way to work with teenagers. Okay. Your daughter went to a party. Maybe she got drunk, went out with a boy that maybe she shouldn’t have. You start with empathy. Because normally when we start telling them what to do, what do they do? If you’re in the car, they get home, they slam the door. They run up to the room, they slam the door. You must have felt horrible when you woke up the next morning and we were standing there with our arms crossed, realizing what you had done. How would you like to discuss this? I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t. This is ridiculous. You’re stupid. You’re stupid. I know I probably, in your mind, look like I’m really stupid because you want me off your back. But what can we learn from this? What could be. What could. If you were to do this again, or if you were telling your best friend, if you were giving her advice, what could you do differently? What would you tell her that. That she could do? Teaching Young People to Consider Consequences Before Acting Because what I’m finding is young people today are using one side of their brain or the other. They see it, they feel it, they do it. But they’re not discussing the repercussions before they actually act. So if your daughter is able to catch this, she can say, hey, hey, hey, wait, wait, wait. Look at me. Is this a good choice? What could we do differently? What are you going to get out of this? And then her friends could do the same to her. But especially with parents. I mean, we are the bad people. But we’re the bad people because we’re always telling them what to do. So they’re afraid that if they open their mouth, anything they say, you’re going to jump right down their throat. But if you flip it around, look at them with kind eyes. I was young once, too. The SWAT Team Story: Asking “What Could You Have Done Differently?” We. We actually had the SWAT team. We went away for one day when we first moved to Florida, and we called, and my son kept saying, no, no, I’m fine. I’m fine. I gotta go. I gotta go. Only to find out when we got home that some football players went to the wrong house, took a keg, and had a party at our house. Yeah. And somebody said that it was a really bad group of kids, and the SWAT team was flying over our house. Gloria Grace Oh, my gosh. Yikes. Yeah. Dr. Dianne Olvera But instead of my husband, this is when we started doing all this. Instead of my husband really getting down on him, he looked him at him with kind eyes, and he just said, what could you have done differently? I don’t know, dad. He said, do you mind if I explain? And that’s the other thing. Do you mind if I give you some advice? I ask that to my teenagers, and they’re shocked. Gloria Grace Mm. Dr. Dianne Olvera And they’ll say, no, I want to talk first. Great. Tell me. And then once we get through that, then I say, can I give you some more advice? Can I stop you here and add something? They feel so respected that then they start doing that with you. Because patterns are contagious. Building Adult Relationships With Your Children Gloria Grace Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And it really does make a difference. And. And I’m. I’m very grateful that my kids actually do ask me for advice now and, you know, or ask me how to do something. You know, they’re. They’re not afraid to, you know. You know, they could just go to Google and, you know, and figure it out. But it’s like, you know. You know, even. Even if it’s just about a recipe or something, and it’s like, it’s fine. It’s nice to feel needed, especially now that they’re adults, that they still. Still want to have, you know, a conversation, and they don’t mind having a conversation with mom, so. So I. You know, I don’t know that I did everything the way you were talking about when they were younger, but I do feel that I know I did it differently than my mom did most of the time, you know, probably 80% of the time, because I knew the way I was treated, and I didn’t want to have them feel the Same way that I felt growing up and. Brain Development and Taking Responsibility Dr. Dianne Olvera Well, but from a brain perspective. Children’s brains don’t finish myelination. The frontal lobe doesn’t finish until 18 to sometimes. 30. Gloria Grace Yeah, absolutely. Dr. Dianne Olvera 30. I said. That’s it. Yeah. No more excuses. Gloria Grace I know, I know. Yes, yes, I do. It’s, it’s so great when they can start being fully human and you can have conversations and not have that. Two Critical Communication Elements: Vocal Tone and Word Clarity Dr. Dianne Olvera The other thing is two things that would really help, I think, in the office if I, if you don’t mind. If I can. Gloria Grace Yeah, yeah, yeah, please. Dr. Dianne Olvera Is vocal tone. When we start screeching and our tone starts to, to move into directions that kind of are piercing, if you can become aware of that. I mean, one of the things we tend to forget is to become aware of how we are coming across to others. And the other is word clarity. Put it on my desk. Get it done by three o’. Clock. What’s it? Redefine your pronouns. Because when pronouns are defined, life becomes more comfortable and you work less. The Importance of Being Verbally Explicit in Communication Gloria Grace Oh, yes, I’ve, I’ve had that with, with a significant other in my life that they would say something. I’m like, I’m not a mind reader. Could you be a little bit more specific, please? I’m not totally clear on what, on what it is exactly that you’re talking about because, you know, we, we tend to assume sometimes, and my mother instructed me on the, you know, that you don’t want to assume. And I’ll let you fill in the rest if you figure out how to spell the word assume. You know what, you know what she’s talking about. Oh, goodness. Yeah, I, I, he’s, he’s a lovely guy, but it’s like, spell it out. Dr. Dianne Olvera And that’s your speech pattern. Yeah, I just realized that it’s your speech pattern that is getting me confused. So can you fill it out as if like an online professor? That’s the first thing you learn. If you are not verbally explicit. Gloria Grace Yeah, that’s true. Dr. Dianne Olvera They blame you. And if you’re, if you’re an entrepreneur and you’re writing emails to your staff and you are not verbally explicit and everyone comes up with things differently, it’s your fault. Gloria Grace Yeah, yeah. You really do have to be careful. And, and in this, you know, day and age of texting and, you know, and then using, you know, short, you know, abbreviations, it’s like, and I saw something the other day and I was like, it took me a little bit to try to figure out what the heck it meant. And then I, I think I got three out of the four letters that I’m like, okay, I think that’s what it is. But I’m not sure, I’m still not sure what that first one was. Using Grammarly for Clear Communication Dr. Dianne Olvera So if you’re an entrepreneur, the best thing, if I could suggest, and that’s free download Grammarly, it’ll even, oh yeah, text. And even if I’m just writing to my son. Yeah, it will fix my grammar and fix my text and it just makes you feel like whenever I push that button, I don’t look like a fool, something foolish. But you know, at least Grammarly I’m fine. What Dr. Olvera is Curious About: The Future of Self-Awareness and Leadership Gloria Grace I love that. I love that. Oh my goodness. Time is just flittering away. Frittering away. Yeah, flittering both works, both words work. But I really am enjoying this conversation and I’m going to ask you one last thing because especially because you’re a researcher. So I bet you’ll love this question because I like to ask my guests, what are you curious about right now? Dr. Dianne Olvera I am curious about how our society is going to attain and maintain itself if our children and young adults are not self aware. Because when you become self aware, you become self sufficient. When you’re self sufficient, you start to have self esteem and self esteem produces leadership. Where are, where are all our leaders going? And the children, the young people today that have been established, you’re great at sports, you’re great at gymnastics, you’re great at writing. If somebody has already helped them identify that at least have one area of their self esteem and self awareness. But look at how many children don’t. Connect With Dr. Dianne Olvera Gloria Grace Yeah. Yeah. Well, hopefully after listening to, to you today, maybe we’ll have enlightened a few parents out there and, or aunts and uncles or whatever. Because it doesn’t just have to be a parent. You can, you can be a mentor or you know, teacher or what have you. So I appreciate that and I’m sure that there are some people out there today that would love to learn more about you and connect with, connect with you. So what is the best place for people to reach out? Dr. Dianne Olvera Well, my website is one word. Yes, thank you. Oh, you are so good. I am in. Gloria Grace Well, for those listening, go ahead and share. Dr. Dianne Olvera www.doctor d r d I A N N E O L v e r a.com Dr. Dr. Dianne Olvera. Gloria Grace All right, excellent. And I will have that in the show notes as well. So, so not to worry. But yes, I want to make sure we, we got that in there. So I really do appreciate all of the wonderful information you shared with us today. And yeah, you’re doing great work in the world and I know we could probably have gone on for a whole nother hour. Closing: Reflections on the Conversation Dr. Dianne Olvera I think frankly, the way you interview, and I’m not saying this to make you feel, but you are, you’re peaceful, you’re calm and, and you go with such a love, lovely flow. It makes it easy to really come converse with you. So thank you, I appreciate that. Gloria Grace Well, I appreciate, I appreciate you for saying that. I, and I, I, it’s, I guess how I’m wired, I’m not sure, but, but. Dr. Dianne Olvera We need you. Gloria Grace Yeah, absolutely. Well, I do want to thank, thank you again for being here and I also want to thank all of you for listening and are watching today. And I encourage you, if you’re not subscribed already, to subscribe on your favorite either podcast platform or you can subscribe on YouTube. And shortly there may be another place you’re going to be able to subscribe to as well. So I will have more details about that down the line and maybe even by the time this comes out. I’m not sure. And until next time, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.  

Does it sometimes feel like you’re pushing a boulder up hill when it comes to achieving entrepreneurial success? As a confidence catalyst and self-love advocate for women over 50, I understand the rollercoaster of emotions that come with building a business and midlife reinvention. In this episode of Live Love Engage, I’m getting real about the messy, frustrating, and sometimes painful process of growth. I’m sharing a personal story about a business partnership gone awry and the valuable lessons I learned from that experience. It’s a reminder that even when things don’t go as planned, there’s always an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. Show Notes | Transcript “You’re allowed to be messy. You’re allowed to stop, to rewrite. You are allowed to yell and still keep showing up for you because you are worthy, you are loved.” – Gloria Grace Rand Embracing Your Natural Rhythm As mission-driven women, we often push ourselves to conform to societal expectations of productivity and success. But what if I told you that honoring your own unique rhythm could be the key to unlocking true fulfillment in your business and life? In this episode, you’ll discover how to: Why respecting your emotional and physical cycles is crucial for success How to identify energy drains in your business and reclaim your time The importance of balancing masculine “doing” energy with feminine “allowing” energy A simple exercise to uncover your natural daily rhythm and boost productivity Women over 50 have a secret superpower: our emotions. Instead of seeing them as a hindrance, I’ll show you how to harness your emotional intelligence to: Make better business decisions Connect more authentically with your audience Navigate challenges with grace and resilience Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Embracing Your Natural Rhythm for Entrepreneurial Success Host: Gloria Grace Rand, Confidence Catalyst and Self Love Advocate Introduction Namaste and welcome to Live Love Engagement! If this is your first time joining us, I’m Gloria Grace, a confidence catalyst and self love advocate. I empower women over 50, especially mission-driven women, to boldly live life on their terms through my LOVE method and energy healing. The Reality of Midlife Reinvention Midlife is often thought of as this great time for reinvention. But if you think it’s going to happen in a neat and clean way, forget about it. For many women over 50, reinvention can be messy and frustrating. And that’s because we are emotional beings—which, as I’ll reveal today, is actually our superpower. When Business Partnerships Go Wrong: A Personal Story The Challenge of Growing a Business Solo Some days, growing a business is not for the faint of heart. There are days when I just want to throw in the towel and get a freaking job. I bet many of you feel that way too. Sometimes it’s because you’re trying to do everything on your own. Sometimes it happens when you partner with someone and it doesn’t work out as planned. My Partnership Experience A few years ago, I was approached by someone from my local networking circles. She connected with my Facebook videos and suggested we explore partnering together. At the time, I was in the middle of reinventing myself—pivoting from online marketing to focusing more on spirituality and self-love. We started meeting regularly, planning events, and recording videos together. We created a free Facebook group and were growing it slowly. Things seemed to be going well until she got involved in another challenge and unilaterally invited a large number of people into our group without discussing it with me first. The Lesson Learned This hurt my feelings because we were supposed to be partners. Rookie mistake: we did not set up a partnership agreement beforehand. Key Takeaway: If you’re going to partner with someone, formalize the arrangement. Have something written down that outlines what each person will do. Don’t be as “loosey goosey” as we were. I ultimately gave her the Facebook group and walked away from the partnership. That night, I was so upset that I wrote a poem—it just spilled out of me with all my hurt and pain. But it was a good lesson that prepared me for future partnerships. Embracing Your Natural Rhythm in Business Understanding Your Body’s Wisdom Reinventing ourselves and growing our businesses isn’t easy. It’s like a roller coaster with lots of ups and downs. So what do we do about that? Honor yourself. Honor your feelings, honor your rhythm—your natural rhythm for how you go about life. As women over 50, even though our bodies might not be going through menstrual cycles anymore, I believe we still have natural rhythms that can affect us emotionally. I often find my rhythm is affected by lunar cycles—new moons, full moons. (Hospital workers will tell you that emergency rooms are much busier during full moons!) Designing Your Daily Schedule Around Your Energy Are you a morning person or an evening person? Morning people: Schedule creative and productive tasks early, then handle less demanding work in the afternoon Evening people: Handle administrative tasks (invoices, emails) in the morning, save creative work for when your energy peaks This applies to monthly cycles too. Plan certain tasks for the beginning of the month, others for the end, and always ensure you get enough rest along the way. The Importance of Self-Care You can’t serve from an empty cup. You’ve probably heard that expression before—it means you can’t keep running on empty. You’ve got to recharge your batteries. Introverts need long periods to recharge Extroverts get recharged in group settings Figure out what works for you and plan accordingly. Breaking Free from the “Go, Go, Go” Mentality Masculine vs. Feminine Energy in Business There’s this idea, especially in Western culture, that we have to just go, go, go and get things done—constant meetings, constant push, push, push. This is a very masculine way of being. We all have both feminine and masculine sides. Sometimes we need to lean into our masculine energy to get things done, but don’t do it at the expense of your feminine side—that softer, allowing, surrendering side that honors your natural rhythm. Reframing Failure That failed partnership could have really brought me down, but I recognized it as a sign from my inner compass that this person wasn’t the right business partner for me. Failure is not a setback—it’s a signal offering you an opportunity to reinvent yourself or do things differently. Practical Exercise: Identifying Energy Drains The Key Questions Ask yourself: What parts of your business are stealing your energy? Is it: Content creation? Balancing books? Scheduling social media posts? Something else? Once you figure that out, ask yourself why you’re letting that happen. The Time and Energy Tracking Exercise Here’s a powerful exercise I learned from a coach years ago: Track everything for a full week (including weekends) Write down the time and activity for every task from morning to night Add this innovation: Note your emotions at each moment Are you tired? Excited? Feeling “I have to do this but don’t want to”? This can be incredibly eye-opening for identifying where your energy leaks are happening. The “Ignore the Clock” Experiment If you could run your day without worrying about all the things you “should” do, and if you could ignore the clock, what would your day look like? Would you be stressed because you’re used to running on schedule? Or would you be able to get in flow and not obsess about time? Try handling your essential tasks first, then forget about the clock for the rest of the day. See how it feels. A Moment of Reflection Right now, as you’re reading this, what are you feeling? Anxious, thinking “I don’t want to do this”? Or excited, thinking “This sounds great! I want to get in flow and make midlife exciting”? Feel your feelings. Honor what’s coming up for you. Energy Healing and Light Language [Note: At this point in the original podcast, Gloria shares a light language healing session. She offers free 15-minute introductory light language sessions for listeners.] Final Thoughts: Permission to Be Human You’re allowed to be messy. You’re allowed to stop and rewrite. You are allowed to yell and still keep showing up for yourself because you are worthy, you are loved. You are allowed to design your life your way. So be bold, be brave, be seen. The world needs you right now. Key Takeaways Midlife reinvention can be messy—and that’s okay Always formalize business partnerships with written agreements Honor your natural daily and monthly rhythms Balance masculine “doing” energy with feminine “allowing” energy Track your time and emotions to identify energy drains View failures as signals, not setbacks You can’t serve from an empty cup—prioritize self-care You have permission to design your life and business your way Next Episode Preview Join us next week for an interview with Dianne Olvera, educator, former diplomat, and author of “The Power of Connection: Understanding Individual Differences to Uplift and Empower.” We’ll explore the art of meaningful connection. Subscribe to Live Love Engagement on your favorite podcast platform or YouTube to never miss an episode. New episodes release every Tuesday. About Gloria Grace: Confidence catalyst and self love advocate empowering mission-driven women over 50 to boldly live life on their terms through the LOVE method and energy healing. Carpe diem—seize the day and make it spectacular by honoring your natural rhythms. Until we meet again, go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

In today’s fast-paced world, the key to transforming your life into one filled with peace and abundance may lie in following Taoist philosophy. That’s what our guest, Gerard Wouters, has discovered in his work as a Taoist therapist. Show Notes | Transcript “Success is that everything is going your way, that you hardly have any setback. And when you have a setback, you know what to do, you know what action you need to take to turn it around. That’s what success is all about.” – Gerard Wouters Gerard shares his fascinating journey into Taoist philosophy, including a serendipitous encounter with his teacher that led to years of intensive study. We discuss how this 2,600-year-old life philosophy can be applied to modern challenges, especially for women entrepreneurs seeking balance and fulfillment. In this episode, you’ll discover: How to interpret setbacks as valuable messages from the universe The surprising connection between physical and emotional healing Why fear is the biggest obstacle to personal growth and success The power of creating emptiness to manifest your desires Key insights include: The importance of unlearning societal conditioning that no longer serves you How to recognize and decipher signs from the universe Why addressing physical issues is crucial for mental and emotional healing The true meaning of success from a Taoist perspective Gerard also introduces his unique approach to therapy, combining physical techniques with profound psychological insights. He explains how this method has helped countless individuals, including those struggling with depression and long-standing emotional issues, achieve remarkable transformations in just a few sessions. Whether you’re grappling with fear, seeking to simplify your life, or simply curious about alternative approaches to personal growth, this conversation offers valuable insights and practical strategies. Tune in to learn how embracing Taoist principles can help you create a life of simplicity, joy, and genuine success. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Gerard Website: https://gerard-wouters.mykajabi.com/taoist-way-for-leaders-and-teams LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerardwouters/ Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT How Taoist Philosophy Can Turn Setbacks into Success Signals with Gerard Wouters Introduction Gloria Grace: Namaste. Today we’re going to be diving into ancient Taoist secrets that can transform your hectic life from… into… well, yeah, transform your life from being one that’s hectic into one that’s filled with simplicity, joy and success. And our guest today is going to explain how letting go of behaviors that no longer serve us can actually create space for the abundance and peace you’ve been searching for. But first, if this is your first time here, I would like to welcome you. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy. And I empower women over 50 to love themselves and the life they’re living and to really be empowered with, to go forward with clarity and confidence. And I am so delighted to have an international guest joining us in just a moment. His name is Gerard Wouters and he is a Taoist therapist from Holland. He’s an author, he’s written seven books and been interviewed frequently on Dutch national TV. And his mission in life is to help people heal from mental issues and show how they can embrace the Taoist way to be happy and successful. So without further ado, I’m going to bring him up here and welcome you, Gerard, officially to Live Loving Age. Gerard Wouters: Thanks for the invite. Gerard’s Journey into Taoism Gloria: Well, I’m glad to have you here because I think this topic is really interesting and I love exploring different spiritual philosophies. And so I’m really curious. I thought we could actually start off by asking, just finding out from you what actually first drew you to Taoist philosophy and maybe even also explain for those who are listening who may not know exactly what that is. I know we’ll get into it more, but what drew you to that and how did it change your life before you started sharing it with others? Gerard: Taoism is a life philosophy and it’s already 2600 years old. And I met my teacher at a business meeting. He was staring at me, very annoying. And as soon as the business meeting ended, I walked up to him and to my big surprise, he told me who I was, what my problem was, where it came from, etc. etc. That got me flabbergasted and very curious as to what this little man was. So I took him home and he stayed at my place for about five weeks or so. And of course he tested me like crazy because he wanted to know if I had the thing that he needed to absorb and implement this knowledge. Because like you said, it is very ancient and also very secret knowledge. And after five weeks he asked me, “Well, you know, do you want to learn this?” And I said, “You know what? You better believe it. I’ve seen so many funny things, strange things that I just cannot grab. And I just want to get to the bottom of this. So, hell yeah, I want to know everything.” And so he started to travel up and down to my country, had a big house at that moment, and he had his own room. And he stayed with me for months and then went back again and then gone back for months. And after about four and a half years, five years, I asked him, “You know what? This knowledge is so incredibly valuable. It shouldn’t stay in the monastery, it should be out there. So is it okay if I turn this into a professional treatment?” And he says, “Okay, that’s good. And I’ll check on you and see how you do it, how you implement this. But on one condition. I don’t want to be a tourist attraction, so you do it without me and don’t ever mention anybody where I am, who I am, because I want my peace.” And I said, “Okay, if that’s the only condition, there’s no problem there.” So from that moment, I started treating people this way. And I’ve been doing it for 28 years now. And this treatment is so incredibly effective that I can help people recover and cure in four two-hour sessions or a two-day workshop, which I would love to do in your country because I found out that 54 million people in your country suffer from depression. And that’s incredible. The Power of Reading Body Language and Facial Expressions Gloria: Well, it is. I want to ask because I’m going to follow up with this in a second, but you mentioned something that intrigued me because you said that when you were first having him stay with you, that there were some things that were surprising. Could you maybe share another example? Gerard: Well, like him, I can say I’m specialized in facial expressions and body language and trust me, it goes a lot further than you think. So I had one situation with him. We were in a hotel, in a bar hotel, and at one moment there was an old couple passing by and he addressed her and told her, “I see you have cancer.” And I said, “What?” And she immediately confirmed this. And he gave her some suggestions, some food suggestions. And then he said goodbye again. And I almost fell off my chair. I said, “You can’t do this. What the hell are you doing out here?” He says, “You know, there’s so many things that you don’t know yet, but it’s visible. Everything is visible in body language, in facial expressions.” And he says, “I know you’ve got it too, but it needs to be fine-tuned.” Gloria: Wow. Amazing. Oh my goodness. Gerard: And now when people come into my practice, I put them on the couch, give them a drink, and I immediately tell them what I see. I see you’re a warrior, you’ve been abused, you have relationship issues. Everything is visible. And I surprise everybody with that. Gloria: Wow. Yeah, that’s amazing. Gerard: And that’s it. I don’t have to give them a diagnosis. I just know. I see this, that’s that and 99% accurate. Understanding Setbacks as Messages from the Universe Gerard: We all go through all kinds of processes, life processes. But the problem is a lot of people don’t learn from it. And there’s one very important thing. We all get setbacks. That’s part of life. But you know what? A setback is nothing more than a clue or a sign that you are doing something that’s not in order with your path. And I deciphered that. I learned people how to decipher setbacks. So it becomes a message that you can work with. You know, for example, when you’ve had an argument with somebody months ago, and at one moment you think, “You know what, let’s have a talk and let’s meet.” So you call this person up, make an appointment, and a few days afterwards you drive up to him and on your way to him, you get a flat tire. There’s your sign. Now there’s two things you can do. Either you repair the flat and go to your friend, and I can assure you that you will not have a fine day because there are always new things happening. But what I learned people, is to turn around and walk away. So what you can do, and that’s the Taoism philosophy, what you can do is you call your friends and you say, “You know what? I’ve got a flat tire and an incredible bad mood. So maybe you can understand that I don’t want to come anymore, but maybe you can call me coming week and then we make a new appointment.” So you leave it at him. You give him the choice and you leave it at him. When he doesn’t call you after five weeks, you know that this is not a friend. Call you the next week. And this way, walking, turning around and walking away creates respect with the other person. And you will get clarity immediately. Clarity as to if he is a real friend or not. Gloria: Yeah, I love it. That’s one of the processes that I explain during sessions and workshops. When something happens, it happens for a reason. Everything in life happens for a reason only. Thinking, we start worrying, we start overthinking, and then we become blind. Gerard: I explain to people how to decipher them because then it becomes a message you can work with, but most people don’t understand how to decipher it. There’s a lot of people who see signs, but they don’t have no clue what to do with it. They start thinking, start worrying, and then the message is not clear and you can’t do anything with it. And you keep going that way, keep getting more setbacks, setbacks. And at the end you get sick. Because that’s how far it goes. And that’s why I explained during sessions and workshops too. If you don’t learn your lesson, you get again, again, again and again. And it’s harder every time. Get sick and, etc, etc, etc. So that’s what you need to understand what the setback means. So you can work with it. You can turn your life around. Understand the message. Very important. Overcoming Fear: The Biggest Modern Challenge Gloria: What are some maybe other common behaviors or thought patterns that you see that no longer serve, let’s say women in business in particular. And how can we begin to unlearn those? Gerard: The biggest problem at this time is fear. And your last guest, Tara, beautiful woman, she understood when you fear, you give the power to somebody else. And that’s not okay. And when you fear, you become blind to things that are really happening out there. When you take the power back, your vision opens up and you see a lot more. Because you know what? Fear. We learned fear once when we were in the jungle ages ago, and there was a reality there, and it’s called animals. And there were huge animals that would love to have us for lunch. But you know what? I don’t meet them anymore at the streets these days. So fear is something that is learned every day by people who are trying to control us, and it’s not serving us anymore. And when people learn fear, they lose their privacy. They lose everything. And that’s not okay because you are the one who should be in control of your life and not some government or whatever, you know? And the problem is when you fear something, it comes to you. You immediately, unconsciously attract it. Gloria: Absolutely. Gerard: When you have fear of spiders, you will find your house full of spiders. Until you understand and realize that a spider is only this big. It is completely useless, harmless. Cannot hurt you. Whatever it does, it cannot hurt you. And the moment you realize that, you unconsciously stop fearing them and they disappear. They’re gone. Not one in your house anymore. When you lose the fear, and this is with a lot of things, it’s always the same people who get scammed, get robbed, who get abused. It’s fear. And when they unlearn fear, and that’s what I do, I unlearn fear, they immediately attract other things because like you said, the universe shows you and brings everything to you that you deserve. But first you have to unlearn worrying. Trust. Trust in yourself. Trust in the universe. And when you trust, everything will come to you. Powerful Client Transformations Gloria: You know, you’ve mentioned that you’ve been teaching for 28 years now. What’s the most powerful transformation you’ve witnessed with one of your clients who’s embraced these Taoist principles? Gerard: Well, on my website, there’s a lot of reviews. I think about two or 300. And there’s one woman that traveled about 170 kilometers for my treatment, who’s been… who’s had treatment for about seven years in the regular mental health section branch. But nevertheless, she was still very depressed and suicidal. And after four sessions, it was completely gone. Now she enjoys life incredibly. And you know what? She sent her daughter and son too. And they made a terrible change too. Gloria: That’s awesome. Yeah. And I think that does happen because I know I’ve witnessed this in my own life, that when you start changing, making positive changes in your own life, then it does have a ripple effect. Gerard: I’ve had a guy with me, and after three sessions, in the third session, he told me, “You know what? To my big surprise, I received an email from my brother,” and I said, “You know, what’s so special about it?” Well, he says, “You know, I haven’t talked to him for 25 years.” Gloria: Oh, my. Wow. Gerard: And he says, “I don’t understand.” I said, “You know, I do. Because when you change, everything around you changes.” And he spent the day with him, and at the end of the day, his brother dared to tell him, “You know what? In our youth, I thought you were a real ass.” And my client said, “You know what? I was a real ass.” He finally took responsibility for his actions, and that made him come closer. Taoist Approach: Body First, Then Mind Gloria: How does the Taoist perspective differ from, I don’t know, even like Buddhism or something like that? Gerard: We all go through all kinds of life processes, and I explain these processes so that you understand why you are doing something, why you will end up in some situations. So basically, I give answers instead of questions. And a lot of people out there who call themselves holistic, well, I’m afraid I don’t agree. Holistic means that you treat the body and the mind. And that’s exactly what I do. I start with a physical treatment. Because the problem is when you’re physically closed, your mind is too. And if you don’t open up the body first, the mind is closed, and you talk to the wall. And that’s what a lot of psychologists who have been under my treatment for the past 28 years have to admit. They don’t come in, their clients don’t open up. And because they don’t open up is because their bodies are shut down. You know, people who have mental issues always have physical issues. Back pains, hip complaints, neck, shoulders, they’re all cramped up. And I can explain them why. Because your body, you can separate your body and call all kinds of things, because up here, there stays anger, and it’s not from yesterday, I can assure you. I have people who’ve been angry for about 20, 40 years and it shows up here, it’s completely cramped. Up between the shoulder blades is grief. When you’ve been hurt, lost somebody, whatever, and you don’t process that, you don’t get over it, it’ll stay in your body. Gloria: Well, I’m curious though, because it seems like you’re saying that you will address the body first and help it to heal, but you do say that there are underlying emotional causes for that. So it seems to me, wouldn’t you want to address the mind first and then have the body respond to it? Gerard: No, no, it’s always the other way around. You have to clear the body first so that your energy flows again and it’s free. A lot of people don’t breathe very properly. So when I open up this, they breathe a lot more and they start to relax like they should. So it’s always first the body and then the mind. Let me give you an example. I’ve had a lot of people, a lot of women who were sexually abused and then they get hip problems and they see physiotherapists for years, sometimes even decades. And with me, in two sessions, it’s gone. Because of the physical. It’s comparable to manual therapy and chiropractic. That’s what I do. Only a lot of these things I do are unknown in the West. Eastern is a lot further at this point. Simple Taoist Practices for Daily Life Gloria: For someone listening, though, if they’re not necessarily able to see you in person in Holland, since that’s where you live, is there some simple Taoist practice that someone could start using today to bring more peace into their life? Gerard: Well, yeah, it’s especially unlearning things, realizing that a lot of things that we learn every day is not helping us anymore. You know, we get taught fear every day. If it’s not terrorism, then it’s climate. It’s always something. But when you look at it the right way, without fear, you see that there’s something else going on. When you see, when you don’t fear, you see a lot more and you see why they teach us fear. And it’s all about control. When you fear, you don’t see it because they use a lot of silly excuses making it look like wonderful, great invention. Well, until you stop fearing and seeing what is really going to happen. Defining Success Through the Taoist Lens Gloria: Your work focuses on making life simple, happy and successful. So what does success look like through the Taoist lens? Gerard: Well, success is that everything is going your way, that you hardly have any setback. And when you have a setback, you know what to do, you know what action you need to take to turn it around. That’s what success is all about. And success is something else for everybody. You know, somebody can be very successful in a happy relationship and somebody could be a multimillionaire and have a huge company. But you know what? Not everybody wants to be a millionaire and not everybody wants to be a CEO. And yeah, unfortunately, not everybody wants to have a relationship either. So success is something for everybody, something else for everybody. But success in Taoism is everything going your way. They call it the flow. When you’re in flow, that’s success. And that can be at every level. The Power of Being Yourself Gloria: You’ve written seven books. Is there a particular teaching or concept that you find yourself returning to most often when you’re working with clients? Gerard: Well, let me tell you a little secret first. I’m dyslexic. So it’s very uncommon for a dyslexic to write books. And let me even surprise you more. I write books in a few days. It takes me a few days to write a book. Don’t ask me how, but that’s probably some of the talents. But what… the most thing I can tell your audience: unlearn, be yourself and not what your surrounding wants you to be because you don’t get happy from that. Discover yourself. A lot of people out there have the feeling they’re not good enough and they’re unworthy. But you know, the problem is you get that signal from the people who feel the same way and realize that and unlearn that. Because when you unlearn that, you will see that all the people who give you the feeling you’re not good enough will completely turn around and give you all kinds of compliments, stimulate you and admire you. Because there’s a very strange thing out there in this world. We admire people who are themselves, but that means that we find it normal that you’re not. And that should be the other way around. Creating from Emptiness: The Taoist Principle Gerard: The funny thing is when you change and you really value yourself, you will attract these people and you will lose a few, too. But they’re not okay for you. People who are too kind always attract the opposite. And that’s not okay because they will abuse you in any way. But when you really become yourself and find out your value, you will see that you will attract other kinds of people on a much higher level mentally. That’s the purpose of life. Grow. We have to grow every day. But what a lot of people do is think, think, think, think, think, think. Well, in Taoism, we say you can only create from emptiness. A building has four walls. But what happens inside the walls gives the building its function. When you put beds in there and equipment, we have a hospital. But when you put desks in it with computers, then we have an office. When you put a couch in it and a television and a table, you have a house. But these are all the same walls. And you can only create from the emptiness in the building and inside you. I’ve had a doctor under my treatment, and after his treatment, he kept contacting me. During lunch he complained to me that he felt such an emptiness inside. And I said, “Do you really hear what you are saying?” He says, “What do you mean?” I said, “Do you realize that there are thousands of monks meditating 24/7 to achieve what you are saying now?” And he says, “What? I never thought of it that way.” I said, “Yeah, but that’s the way you should. You created the emptiness inside you, and I helped you with it. Now deal with it, enjoy it. Because this is what monks are meditating 24/7 to achieve. And I gave it to you as a present. So be happy with it because this is how it should be.” Understanding Life’s Transitions Gerard: Taoism is a lifestyle and it makes life a lot simpler and it gives you the possibilities to see a lot more out there, see the patterns and see all the things that happening in the world and understand why it’s happening. In my two-day workshop and in sessions I explain about a kitchen being demolished and being replaced by a new one. And that’s exactly what is happening in this world. We are tearing down the kitchen and we’re making room for a new world. And that’s what I teach people. Understand that all the bad things you see happening in the world all have a reason too. And most of the time the reason is wake them up. Gloria: And I do want to thank all of you for joining us today. And I hope, as I said, that you receive some value out of this conversation. And check out Gerard’s website. I will have all of that information in the show notes, so you can go check that out. And of course, I’d love to encourage you to, if you are new, to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite platform so you’ll know when our next episode comes out. They come out every week or you can subscribe if I can speak subscribe on YouTube as well. So until next time, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe to Live Love Engage on your favorite podcast platform or on YouTube. New episodes are released weekly.  

Have you ever found yourself mindlessly scrolling through social media, only to realize you’re feeling more anxious than before? If so, you’re not alone. As someone who’s recently fallen into the trap of “doomscrolling,” I understand how easy it is to get sucked into the vortex of negative news and heated debates online. In this Live. Love. Engage. episode, I’m sharing my personal struggle with social media doomscrolling and offering practical strategies to break free from this harmful habit. As a Midlife Empowerment Guide and Self-Love Advocate, I believe it’s crucial for mission-driven women over 50 to protect their mental health and cultivate positivity in their lives. Show Notes | Transcript “Be honest about your behavior. If you find that this (doomscrolling) is becoming a habit, ask yourself, what’s going on? Why am I doing this?” – Gloria Grace Rand Why Breaking Free from Doomscrolling Matters Studies have shown that excessive consumption of negative content on social media can: Worsen depression and anxiety Exacerbate obsessive-compulsive tendencies Trigger post-traumatic stress symptoms As empowered women seeking to make a positive difference in the world, we need to be mindful of how we engage with social media and protect our mental well-being. Practical Strategies to Escape the Doomscroll Prison: I’ve compiled a list of 15 actionable tips to help you regain control over your social media habits. Here’s a sneak peek at some of the strategies we’ll explore: 1. The 5-second rule for breaking the scrolling cycle 2. Setting intentional time limits for social media use 3. Curating a more positive feed 4. Practicing mindfulness while engaging online 5. Using digital wellness apps to support healthier habits If you’re ready to reclaim your time, energy, and peace of mind from the clutches of doomscrolling, this episode is for you. Tune in for practical wisdom, spiritual insights, and a touch of humor as we navigate the challenges of modern technology together. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Mindful Scrolling: How to Use Social Media Without Losing Yourself Opening Confession Gloria Grace: Namaste. I’ve got a confession to make. I have fallen into a terrible trap lately of going out to Facebook first thing in the morning, getting sucked into posts about politics and arguments and endless updates about things I just can’t control. If you’re like me and you have entered doom scroll prison, then today’s episode is for you because we are going to plot our escape together because it’s got to stop. And actually today I did better doing one of the things we’re going to talk about today. But first, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, midlife empowerment guide, confidence catalyst and self love advocate. And I empower mission driven women over 50 to boldly live life on their terms. And I do it through my signature love system and energy healing. The Problem with Social Media So it’s interesting this idea about social media—it can be really great and it really helps bringing people together, and it’s natural to want to go there to seek information and stay informed. But when it gets into a habit of where you’re wasting time or spending too much time reading negative stories, studies have shown it can actually harm your mental health. It can worsen problems like depression and certainly cause anxiety, or worsen things like obsessive compulsive disorder and PTSD. As I said, the tool is not inherently bad. It’s that unfortunately, as we all know, the algorithms love to serve up stuff that kind of gets you going. I want to share with you a bunch of ways that we can stop this doom scrolling because it’s not good for us. And if we want to be empowered women and we want to be able to make a difference in the world and to make a positive difference—I know that you are here to make a positive difference in the world. And the more that we can fill our lives with positivity instead of the negativity, then that vibration will go out in the world. And even though right now it seems rather dicey at times, especially here in the United States, but even around the world, there’s lots of sadness and chaos and violence and war—we’ve all been here before. Maybe not me, but our ancestors have all lived through this stuff before. And we will get through this too. We will. Because love always wins. Light always shines out of the darkness. Strategy #1: The Five-Second Rule So here’s number one—you might want to get a pencil and piece of paper and write these down. The first one is to use the five second rule. So when you notice that you’re starting to keep going and going and going and you’re scrolling and it’s like, “Oh, wait a minute, do I really want to do this?” just stop, take a breath, count to five. Well, count down from five—five, four, three, two, one. And then close out of your phone, or if you’re on your computer, close out of that window and go do something else. I’m sure you have something else that you could be doing, whether it’s in your work or your family life, whatever it is. Strategy #2: Set Time Limits Number two is another time related one, which is to just set a time limit. Set a timer and just do that so that when the timer goes off, if you want to set a timer on your phone or you can set a timer wherever else—my mother used to have actual real timers, remember those actual timers that you would turn? I used to have one of those to help me do laundry. Now it’s like our phones, but the old analog days. Set a time, and then when that timer goes off, you’re done. You gotta stop. Don’t keep going. Honor yourself. Keep your commitment to yourself—that’s one of the four agreements. Be impeccable with your word. So if you’re telling yourself, “Okay, I’m going to honor that, I’m only going to spend 15 minutes on Facebook today,” maybe just 15 minutes of going through the newsfeed—probably less than that might be better. Maybe five minutes might be enough, frankly. But then when that timer goes off, then say, “Okay, I’m gonna honor, I’m gonna be impeccable with my word, and I’m keeping my commitment.” That’s it. I’m done. Strategy #3: Seek Out Positivity Number three: seek out positivity. You get into this negative stuff. All right, you know what? Take a break and go find a funny video to watch on YouTube instead. Cat videos, baby videos. Oh, babies are so sweet. They always make you laugh. Read something good. Maybe find a spiritual passage to read. I subscribe to the Daily Word from Unity, and I always get them in my phone. So I have the Daily Word message. And those are really uplifting. Something to read. Practice gratitude. Say, “Okay, I’m off of this now. Let me just be grateful that I had a phone to use. I am grateful that I’m alive. I’m grateful that I can see or hear or whatever it is.” Strategy #4: Notice Your Body Number four is to notice your body. If you’re gonna go through social media, be mindful about it and pay attention to how your body is feeling. I know for me, when I get upset, my stomach starts to tighten up. So that might be something for you. Or maybe your neck tightens or your shoulders get tight. Pay attention to your body because your body is giving you a signal, and it’s a wonderful thing. [Note: Gloria becomes emotional here, mentioning seeing her late sister Michaela in her reflection] Pay attention to how your body’s feeling. And pay attention to what’s your mind doing? How’s your mind reacting? And if you don’t like how you’re feeling, that’s your signal to say, “Okay, I think we’re done. Let’s take a break and go do something else.” Strategy #5: Avoid Catastrophizing Number five is to avoid catastrophizing. Isn’t that a lovely big word? Which basically means instead of jumping to “Oh my God, the world’s gonna end, this is terrible,” be more discerning and use your critical thinking skills and question what is a more realistic outcome of this situation rather than just immediately going to worst case scenarios. Instead maybe even ask, “Okay, what could be the best outcome of this happening?” Let your imagination run wild and try to think of something more positive about it. Strategy #6: Engage in Thought Stopping Number six is to engage in thought stopping, which means to pick up the phone consciously and with purpose. Just say, “Okay, I am consciously going to go in, I’m going to just review, scan a little bit just to see what my friends are up to on social media, or just do it for business for a little bit. I’m going to be really purposeful about what I’m using social media for right now.” Approach it from that aspect because when you, as opposed to just going on and being mindless about it, we want to be more mindful and purposeful and say, “Okay, I’m going to go in and I’m going to comment on a bunch of posts. I’m going to check in with my Facebook group if you have one, or if you are a member of Facebook group, I’m gonna just go in the Facebook group. I’m not gonna go on the news feed, frankly.” Strategy #7: Slow the Pace of Scrolling Number seven is to slow the pace of scrolling. So instead of just going blah, blah, blah, looking, looking, looking—no, focus on quality of content. So if you see something that catches your eye, then actually really stop and read it and then sort of take a moment to digest the information and again, think about it a little bit and see, do you really agree with it? Do you not agree with it? Is it worthy of a comment? Or maybe it’s worthy of just saying, “You know what? I don’t like this at all. I’m not going to follow it anymore.” And that’s okay, too. Strategy #8: Curate Your Feed Which gets me into number eight, which is about curating your feed, because that’s the thing. You do have control, at least when it comes to Facebook. You can snooze people, you can X out. When you’re going through the newsfeed, if you see a post that you’re like, “I don’t want to follow this person”—and of course, now the lovely algorithm of Facebook is showing you all this stuff, giving you all these different people and pages to follow now and groups to follow. It’s quite annoying. But there’s some different ways around this that you can go. Number one, there is a friends feed, essentially. Right on your phone, up at the very top, you’ll see like two icons of two people. And so that’s your friends feed. So you can just look at posts from your friends on Facebook as opposed to all of these other people. And I need to remember to do this more often, frankly. But in the regular newsfeed, if you see something you don’t like, you can click on three little dots and it gives you your choice of “interested,” “not interested,” “more posts like this,” “less posts like this,” “hide posts.” And then you can snooze the person or unfollow them. You have the prerogative, you have control about what you want to be served up. So even though Facebook will figure it out, you still have control. So curate your feed. That’s a really important one. Quick Recap of First 8 Strategies Let me recap because we’re like halfway through. So we’ve got: Use the 5 second rule – breathe when you notice, breathe, count down for five and then do something else Set a timer Seek out positive stuff instead – focus on how your body feels Question, use your critical thinking skills Be mindful about it, be conscious about what you’re using social media for Slow the pace of scrolling, really focus on quality Curate your feed – unfollow accounts or topics that upset you And also then seek out positive ones and follow those. That’s one thing I’m going to do more of. I want to go back in and look for uplifting pages and people and things like that that I want to follow if I’m not following them already. I want to do that so that I have more of that to look at. Because as I said at the beginning, and I’ve talked about this in other podcasts before, and I’m sure you’ve heard this: what you focus on grows. So if you’re going to focus on negativity, that’s what’s going to be served up to you, and it’s what you’re going to see and it’s going to lower your vibration and your day is probably going to be blah. So instead, focus on positive stuff. Strategy #9: Practice Affirmations Which brings me to number nine, which is to practice affirmations. Put positive messages around you. You could even have a positive message on your phone. Maybe it’s like your wallpaper so that you always see that. Now I have a picture of a hot air balloon. That’s my positive message. Because my son treated me to a trip to the Albuquerque Balloon Festival a few years back and I just loved it. And so that always puts me in a good mood to see that balloon. But yeah, have those positive messages around you. Put them on your computer screen, put them on your bathroom mirror, put them on your bedroom dresser or wherever you’re going to see them. Put them in the kitchen. We’re always in the kitchen, right? Put them on your refrigerator and surround yourself with positivity. So I have a vision board up in my office here. And it’s got lovely things like “with God, all things are possible” and “I am open to receive” and “I am worthy.” Those things are great to be able to see, to feed your mind with that stuff as opposed to all the negative stuff. Strategy #10: Focus on the Present Moment Number 10—again, some of these are a little similar, but they got slightly different flavor. So number 10 is to focus on the present moment. So again, if you find yourself scrolling and suddenly not feeling great about it, just stop and say, “Okay, what can help me feel better right now?” And then maybe it is just completely turning it off, or maybe it is seeking out positivity, looking for something fun or going for a walk. Maybe it’s like, “I’m gonna get outside for a little bit, give me some fresh air and just get away from the nonsense that’s out there.” Strategy #11: Be Honest About Your Behavior Number 11, this one’s really good, is to be honest about your behavior. So again, if you find that this is becoming a habit, which I’m kind of thinking even for me too, is to start asking your higher self. Ask yourself, “What’s going on? Why am I doing this? Am I bored? Am I looking for guidance? Am I looking to confirm my fears?” But be curious and maybe do some journaling about it. That just came to me, that wasn’t on my list. There’s number 16—journal about it and ask yourself, “Why am I letting myself do this when it doesn’t feel good? What is the payoff for doing this? Is it to confirm a bias?” We’re humans. We do like to do that. We like to confirm our how we see the world and confirmation bias. So are you seeking that? And that’s okay, sort of. But is it really going to serve you in the long run? So yeah, that might be something to do to really be curious and wonder why are you indulging in this habit. Strategy #12: Use Digital Wellness Apps Number 12 is you can use some digital wellness apps to ease your mind. So this is where you can do things. There’s lovely apps, and I know there’s one that does a lot of meditation, so you might want to do that again, do some positive readings. And I’m sure there’s apps on the phone that serve up positive content. Like I mentioned, I get the Daily Word. And I think actually Unity does have an app as well. Another app that I’ve used, I think I’ve talked about it on the podcast before, is something called the Triple Flame app. And this is an app that helps you create pauses during your day where you can just stop and contemplate and just look out the window and just think of things. And it also has some other resources as well. It has some videos about the art of contemplation and how to do that. It has some articles and some other audio journeys. I think it has even meditations as well. So it’s a really cool app. So I highly recommend it. And free. Hey, can’t beat free. I like free stuff. That always makes me happy to have something for free. Strategy #13: Turn Off Notifications Another thing you can do is to turn off your notifications. So if you’re one of those people that sees notifications—I have like for messages when I’ve got messages, but I turned off my notifications from Facebook, so I don’t want to be told when to go on there. I want to decide if I want to go on there. I don’t want it yelling at me like, “Oh, you’ve got 15 notifications.” No. So consider doing that. And if you’re also maybe getting news from an app on the phone, you might want to turn those notifications off as well if that’s getting you where you’re going through the news too much. I’ve been picking on social media, but it could also be the same thing as going through news. Then you might want to turn those notifications off as well. And just again, be mindful about when you’re gonna just check in. Because I do like to at least get the headlines just so I have a sort of an idea about what’s going on in the world. And then if there is something really interesting, then I’ll go in depth and read an article. But I don’t want to be constantly bombarded. Strategy #14: Screen-Free Self-Care Time Number 14: Have some screen free self care time. And if you are a regular listener, you know I talk about self care, the importance of self care a lot on this podcast. It’s so important to your physical well being, your mental well being, your spiritual well being. So make sure that self care is a non negotiable for you. So for me, I always go for a walk in the morning and I meditate. Those are my two non negotiable goals. I also endeavor to journal every day. Sometimes I will skip a day, but I give myself a little latitude with that one. But exercise and meditation, I have to do those first thing in the morning because I’m a morning person and if I don’t do the exercise in the morning, it might not ever get done. So I make sure that I do that first, either exercise or meditate. I sometimes will shake it up and do one first and then the other, but I make sure those are done. But if you’re a night person, then exercise at night or meditate at night. It has to fit your schedule. You need to decide what you want to do. Also a gratitude journal. I’ve talked about that, the importance of that. Some people like to do their gratitudes in the morning, some people like to do them at night. I like to do it at night before I go to bed. I kind of think about the day and think about specific things that happen that I’m really grateful for. And that way I go to bed with a positive frame of mind. Strategy #15: Get Support And number 15 is to get some support. Share your intentions to quit doom scrolling with a loved one or a significant other or a best friend or somebody who will hold you accountable. Because especially if this has become a really tough habit for you to break, letting somebody else know, having someone check in—maybe have them message you maybe at the time of day when you would typically do this and say, “Hey, what you doing? Are you doom scrolling right now? If you are, stop.” So yeah, because you don’t have to do this stuff alone. You can always get support. And if you’re still doing it, even with support, then you might want to start talking to a professional about it. And that’s okay. Consider talking with a therapist or a mental health professional. You can even just call somebody—they have helplines that you can find online and you can talk to somebody anonymously if you want rather than making an appointment to speak with someone in person. Actually they even have—what is it? BetterHelp. I see a lot of podcasts I follow have BetterHelp as a sponsor. And they are an online app that helps you to connect with a licensed professional. So you definitely want to do that, or even talk to a coach. I mean, even somebody like me, I could help you. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you did ever want to talk with me, maybe you have questions about some of this stuff, if you want to schedule just a conversation, go to engagewithgloria.com and you can schedule a call with me. It takes you right to my calendar and you can book a time to chat with me. Recap of Strategies 9-15 So let me go back and recap now. The second batch: Practice affirmations Focus on the present moment Be honest about your behavior – ask what’s going on, why am I doing this, be curious Use digital wellness apps – there are a ton of them out there to help you ease your mind a bit Turn off the push notifications Have self care time where you’re not on the phone or the computer Share your intentions with someone to quit doom scrolling and get support and accountability Light Language Healing And I’m going to share one other thing with you that I believe can help you certainly right now and to be able to maybe release some sort of block that is getting you to want to do this. So I’m going to set the intention today that I’m going to share what I call light language with you. And this is a type of speech and a type of song that I channel—it comes through me that comes from higher dimensions and it is something that your logical brain won’t necessarily be able to translate because it’ll sound like a foreign language. And I can’t actually translate it word for word. I will have impressions of themes about what is coming through, but it’s not word for word. But it’s something that is intended to speak to your heart and your soul and to help clear up energy blocks and to really be a way to frankly just to relax, to have a little stress relief in your day. So I’m going to invite you to, if you’re listening to this podcast while you’re driving a car, to come back, pause it and come back to this later when you can be somewhere where you can have your feet on the ground or feet on the floor and you can be in a comfy chair and just see about closing your eyes and set an intention that the message that you’re going to receive will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. And that is the intention that I am setting right now as well. So close your eyes, take a deep breath, let it out, relax and let’s see what comes through today. [Light Language segment] Closing I would love to know if you find one of these ways helpful today. You can reach out to me on LinkedIn @Gloria Grace Rand and you can also go to my website, you can send a message. I’ve got a little contact box down at the lower right hand corner where you could send a message to me and I’d love to hear your progress. I know I am going to be trying a few of these things and I know today one of the things I did was I realized that I was scrolling and I was like “stop, no, stop. You got other things to do, stop.” And that’s what I did. So I didn’t do the five second rule exactly, but I stopped. That’s the important thing. So I encourage you to do that as well. Next Episode Preview Now next week I encourage you to join us because I’ve got an interesting conversation with a gentleman. His name is Gerard Wouters I believe is how you pronounce it. He’s a Taoist therapist from Holland and he is going to be sharing with us how you can explore this 2600-year-old Taoist philosophy and use it to transform your hectic life into one of peace and abundance. And I think we all could use more peace certainly in the world and a little more abundance. And it doesn’t have to be just money—there could be abundance of love and of friends and of joy and of happiness. That’s a wonderful thing too. So make sure that you are subscribed on your favorite podcast platform or on YouTube if you’re watching us there and that way you’ll get notified when the next episode comes out. So until then, as always I’d like to encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically. Connect with Gloria Grace Website: engagewithgloria.com LinkedIn: @GloriaGraceRand Contact: Message box available on website Resources Mentioned Daily Word from Unity Triple Flame App – Free contemplation and meditation app BetterHelp – Online therapy platform Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz This episode provides practical strategies for breaking free from doom scrolling habits that can harm mental health. Gloria Grace’s honest sharing about her own struggles with social media creates a relatable foundation for the 15 actionable strategies she provides. The episode emphasizes personal empowerment, mindful technology use, and the importance of focusing on positivity to raise your vibration and contribute to positive change in the world.  

What does it really take to improve mental health? In this powerful episode, visual artist and psychiatry professor Meghan Caughey shares her incredible journey from surviving schizophrenia to thriving as an educator and advocate. Show Notes | Transcript “Sometimes you just go through the fire, and then there you are, in the middle of the fire, and you deal with that. That might be your path.” Meghan Caughey Meghan discusses the science behind art therapy, the concept of “making art from the edge of the bridge,” and how creative expression can transform trauma into healing. She offers a unique perspective on recovery that combines lived experience with scientific understanding. In this episode, you’ll discover: How creative expression can serve as a powerful coping mechanism during times of emotional turmoil The surprising scientific evidence supporting art’s ability to rewire the brain and promote healing Why embracing your unique artistic voice is more important than technical perfection The potential of art as a complementary approach to traditional mental health treatments Key insights include: The measurable impacts of various art forms on brain chemistry and stress reduction How Meghan’s Buddhist practice intertwined with her artistic journey to foster resilience The importance of challenging limiting beliefs about recovery and personal potential Why being present and supportive can be more powerful than having all the answers when helping someone in crisis Meghan also introduces us to the concept of “free drawings” – a technique that allows the unconscious mind to express itself through art without judgment or planning. This approach offers a gateway to self-discovery and emotional processing, even for those who don’t consider themselves traditionally artistic. Whether you’re navigating your own mental health journey, supporting a loved one through challenges, or simply curious about the healing power of creativity, this conversation offers valuable insights and practical strategies. Tune in to learn how tapping into your creative side might just be the key to unlocking greater mental wellness and personal growth. As German artist Gerhard Richter said, “Art is the highest form of hope.” So why not pick up that paintbrush, pen, or instrument today? Your brain – and your spirit – might thank you for it. Connect with Meghan Art website: https://meghancaughey.com/ Memoir website: https://mudflowerbook.com/ Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Live Love Engage Podcast: Lotus Blooms from Darkness: Finding Hope in Mental Health Challenges Guest: Meghan Caughey – Visual Artist, Cellist, and Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at Oregon Health and Science University Host: Gloria Grace, Founder of Align to Shine Academy Episode Topic: Art as a Pathway to Mental Health Recovery and Brain Healing Introduction Gloria Grace: Namaste. Are you ready to discover how creativity can literally rewire your brain and become your secret weapon for mental wellness? Well, stick with us because we’re going to be exploring how making art from the edge of the bridge isn’t just a metaphor. It’s a powerful pathway to healing that can actually help entrepreneurs like you move from surviving to thriving. But first, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. And my guest today is an amazing woman. Her name is Meghan Caughey, and she was an artist and cellist from an early age. But then Meghan developed schizophrenia when she was a freshman in college. But she has recovered and now is a visual artist and assistant professor of psychiatry at Oregon Health and Science University. And I really looking forward to having her join us and talk to us a little bit about her journey and about art and the brain. So welcome, Meghan, to Live Love Engage. Meghan Caughey: Thank you so much, Gloria. I’m really happy to be with you today. Early Discovery of Art as Healing Gloria: I thought we’d actually start if you can maybe kind of take us back to when you first discovered this healing power of art, especially during your journey with schizophrenia. Meghan: Okay, well, can I go back even before that? This will date me, but I just want to say I have made art all my life, and I come from a family of musicians, and I had a great uncle that was a painter. But when President Kennedy was shot, I was in elementary school, and I think I was like 9 or 10 years old, and it was awful. And everyone was crying and it was tragic. And my response was to get a piece of paper and some pencils and draw a picture about it. So even then I knew that if there was something terrible and awful in our environment, something awful that happened to us that we didn’t know how to handle emotionally or psychologically, that by making a picture about it, that that was the way to deal with it. And by the same token, when I was about the same age I had my Uncle Gene who worked in construction, and he had a terrible accident and had to be in the hospital and he died. And my response was to write a poem about it for him and that way helped me emotionally connect with him and it was healing for both me and my mother read it to him. That’s just an example of before I even developed this hard to deal with psychiatric illness known as schizoaffective disorder or schizophrenia. I was making art from early, early on because it works, because it’s powerful. The Onset of Schizophrenia Gloria: What happened when you were diagnosed then? Were you able to start kind of again going back to using art to be able to help? Meghan: Well, I was 19. I was a freshman in college at a school in Colorado. I went to Colorado not because I thought the school was any good, but because I wanted to be able to go backpacking in the Rockies. So that was my priority. And I got to school, new freshman and immediately took off backpacking. And this was the 70s. And then I was going to study art. I had gone back and forth between would my major be cello or visual art, and I decided on visual art. So I was taking an art history class. And one day early on I was in this big cathedral, big auditorium like classroom, and I had seats all the way back to the ceiling in the back. I was up by myself on the top row. And during the lecture when the professor was lecturing about famous artists, I started hearing something very small in the back of my brain. I didn’t pay attention to it, but it got louder gradually during the course of the class. And I remember the teacher was showing work by Francesco Goya, if you all are familiar with his paintings. But I started listening more and more because I just couldn’t tune it out. And then suddenly I realized that it was telling me I was bad. It was talking to me and telling me I was bad. And I didn’t know what it was. It was awful. And so soon the class was over and the lights came on and I went running out of the classroom. I went going across the main campus, and there was this woman, this other student, walking towards me. It was a woman with blonde hair, blonde ponytail and a red sweater. And when she got up close to me, I looked at her face, and her face looked like a giant insect. Gloria: Oh, my goodness. Meghan: I was terrified. So I went running to get to my dormitory, running up to my room. And then when I was in my room, I went to the mirror and I looked at the mirror at myself. And I wasn’t myself, was no longer a young woman. I was a beast with holes for nose and blood dripping down my mouth and awful eyes. It was the scariest. I can’t really say how awful it was. And I saw that, and I thought my life would never be the same. I knew on some level that I had changed in a way that I just couldn’t explain, couldn’t understand. It was terrible. The Long Journey of Recovery Meghan: So I went through that year. When the snows came, this was Colorado, when the early first snows came, I’d been having these hallucinations. That’s what they were, hallucinations. And I went out when the first snow came, and I was looking up at the snow, and it was such a relief to have the beautiful snow coming down. And some students came and said, you don’t have your coat on, you don’t have your shoes on. We’re taking you to the student health center. They knew I was not doing well. And that was the beginning of being hospitalized many times through my life for the symptoms of schizophrenia and later schizoaffective disorder. I’ve been hospitalized over 100 times. Gloria: Wow. Meghan: But I’m over that now. But it’s not like everything is totally simple, but my life has—no one ever thought that I would be able to have a career and a life that has meaning and I’m respected in my work and I love my life. And yet sometimes things are just better than we could ever imagine. The Lotus Revelation Gloria: What helped you to finally start being able to be where you are today? Meghan: Well, it’s not a simple path. But when I was in high school, before I was even ever diagnosed with schizophrenia, I started studying Buddhism and started meditating. And then later, after I became symptomatic of schizophrenia, I had this kind of real strange life because on one hand I was having these terrible hallucinations and mind states. And at the same time I still was interested in meditating. There was a time in my life when I was very unhappy, in a lot of emotional pain. I was very suicidal. So I made a number of suicide attempts. And I realized at one point that it was just a matter of time until I was successful. But at the same time I was meditating every week nearly as I could with this group of Buddhists. And they were very much into non violence. And I was aware of the conflict that here I was doing these violent things to myself, yet I was practicing and I had the value of nonviolence. So there was one night where I was awake during the night and I was walking through the house and I went to my studio and I had this contemporary Buddhist magazine just laid on the chair. I picked it up absentmindedly—I couldn’t sleep, and my mind was looking for something, obviously. So there was an article in this magazine on lotuses, lotus flowers, which is a symbol in Buddhism and many cultures of beauty and reverence. And they’re very special flowers. So I read about mudflowers, which is my name for lotuses. And it said that a lotus is a beautiful flower, but it has to have its roots in the mud in order to bloom and be beautiful. And I read that, and suddenly I just had this realization: oh, my goodness, my life has so much mud. I have all this mud, this pain and suffering, all these years of pain and suffering, and that’s a lot of mud. And I can be a lotus. And that mud will help me have a really beautiful life, because I have a lot of it. So I was in my studio, and I picked up a brush, I started painting a lotus painting. And I paid special attention to the mud around the flower. And that was the beginning of a change in my life because I started painting lotus after lotus, all different kinds, different sizes, different colors. Each time I painted one, I was reinforcing this belief that I could use the pain and suffering of my life to create really beautiful. And see, that’s what I’ve done. That’s what I’m doing with my life. Making Art from the Edge of the Bridge Gloria: I mentioned in the intro that you say something about making art from the edge of the bridge. So what does that mean to you exactly? Meghan: Well, in my first memoir, my first book, which is called “Mudflower: Surviving Schizophrenia and Suicide Through Art,” at the end of the book, I am forced with needing to support someone that I know who is totally filled with grief and unhappiness and wants to end her life. I lived in Portland, Oregon, and Portland has all these big river and lots of bridges through the city to get from one side of the city to the other. And it was in the middle of the night, and my friend that I was trying to support—her boyfriend had died from a fentanyl overdose. And so she had texted me in the middle of the night, said, “I have to go be with him.” And then I realized I put some facts together. I realized that she was talking about ending her life. And see, she was someone I love. So I figured out she was on the edge of this bridge in Portland, where it’s known to be a place where people have sometimes completed suicide. So in the middle of the night, I rushed to her to be with her. And there at that time, I just had to make the decision, was I going to live? I mean, I needed to live to help support her and support people I love and have a life that I love. But I was conflicted. But my belief is that oftentimes the big decisions that we make with our life are like on the edge of the bridge, where it’s like, if you jump into the bridge, into the river, you’re going to die. Or you can stay on the edge, which is not easy, but it can help save someone. It might save you. And I used to tell people I was working in mental health in Portland. I would say to people, “You can go through the fire and come out on the other side, because I’ve done it—you can do it, too.” When I was on the edge of the bridge, I realized sometimes the point is not to go through the fire and then come out on the other side. Sometimes you just go through the fire, and then there you are in the middle of the fire, and you deal with that—that might be your path. And you can do great good and do service for people and help yourself even from the middle of the fire. So the book I’m working on now is called “Making Art from the Edge of the Bridge.” And it takes off from that. The Science Behind Art and Brain Healing Gloria: I’m curious to know what you know about current research that talks about this connection between creativity and brain healing. Meghan: There is a ton of research and data right now. I would recommend there’s a wonderful book called “Your Brain on Art” by Susan Magnuson and Ivy Ross. Susan Magnuson is a director at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. And this book has all the data that you need if you want to find research and just get an overview of what’s been done. What a lot of people don’t realize—I live in Oregon, and Oregon is behind the time when it comes to art and medicine. But there are places in the United States and also in the world where art and medicine just go together. I mean, especially Great Britain and places like Johns Hopkins where Susan Magnuson is. They have all kinds of research. So making art, whether it’s visual art or music or dance or storytelling or going to a symphony, dancing, all of this makes changes in the brain. And they are measurable. They are being measured. And so art is now—this is not every place, but some places people will use art to help treat Parkinson’s disease, dementia, Alzheimer’s, all kinds of diseases. There’s some specific research about how making art causes changes with neurotransmitters. Did you know that if you are nervous, if you are having anxiety and you scribble or make art for about 20 minutes, that the stress hormone in your brain, the cortisol, will come down in about 75% of people? Oxytocin, the love hormone, will go up if you make art. And there’s a center in our brain called the amygdala—it’s our fight or flight center. If we get stressed and we’re scared, we’re panicking, the amygdala will activate and get all busy. But if you make art, the amygdala calms down. Teaching and Lived Experience Gloria: How has your own personal experience with mental illness shaped your approach to teaching and research? Meghan: I love being a psychiatry professor. I love working with medical students and psych residents. And I just finished an eight week class where I was part of a group working with primary care physicians that are rural. And we would do zoom at like 7:15 in the morning. And these doctors were all over the Pacific Northwest and they were getting ready to go meet with patients all day. But the topic was suicide prevention. Part of what I want to say is we are seeing in medicine that there is a greater appreciation of what’s called lived experience. So I have lived experience because I had a diagnosis and many years of hospitalizations and treatments and all these things. I can call on my experiences when I give a talk to the public Psychiatry training program which is the program I teach the most at the school where I work. People have not talked to someone who has the experiences that I have. I mean when you have over 100 hospitalizations, that’s a lot even now. I’m able to tell people from my lived experience what it’s like to have side effects to the medication or to totally—whatever, you know, I can tell people from a perspective that is very vulnerable and very real. And I tell you they—people respond. And I use, when I do seminars and presentations, I use my art to illustrate what I’m talking about. Free Drawing and Unconscious Expression Meghan: When I graduated from college, I changed my major from art to psychology because I was trying to figure out what was going on with my brain with schizophrenia. And then when I graduated, finally, I was going to become an art therapist. So I went to graduate school briefly in Vermont. And I didn’t last very long because I got very symptomatic. But the thing I learned was that there’s this thing called free drawings. And free drawings is you just—you don’t plan what you’re going to draw or paint. You just let your hand move across the crayon or the paintbrush or whatever, and your unconscious pulls out the image. And learning to do that changed my art because my art became focused on whatever was coming up in my unconscious, which is a pretty interesting place at times. A lot of people think, “Oh, I’m not an artist. I can’t draw a horse that looks like a horse.” A lot of people will tell me, “I can’t draw. I can’t make art. I’m not an artist.” Because when they were in kindergarten, someone named Johnny could draw a horse that looked just like a horse. And the teacher said, “Oh, look at Johnny’s horse. Johnny is an artist.” And everyone whose horse doesn’t look like a horse, whose horse looks like a slug or a snail or snake, they think, “Oh, mine doesn’t look right, so I’m not an artist.” And they go through their lives with that. Making art doesn’t have to look a certain way. It’s really a process thing. Misconceptions About Mental Health Recovery Gloria: What other misconceptions about mental illness and recovery are there that you wish more people understood? Meghan: Mental health issues, psychiatric illness is not an end point. I mean, there is recovery possible and recovery can look many different ways. My recovery doesn’t look like someone else’s recovery necessarily, but people can recover and contribute. And so if someone has something that’s going on with them that seems psychiatric or mental, and maybe they make art, maybe they don’t, but maybe they discover art, some form of art that they love, that can be a pathway to some, to the next thing. People used to think I would never recover. I would never be able to probably be out of the back ward of a hospital. And yet I’m a psychiatry professor and I have a wonderful life. It wasn’t supposed to happen. When I first decided that I wanted to try working, I was getting treatment at a county mental health program. And I told my doctor I wanted to work. I hadn’t worked in many years. He said, “Oh, you’re too sick to work. You’re too sick to work.” I thought, “I wonder if I can challenge that.” Individual Paths to Recovery Meghan: I get the greatest pushback and I get a real hard time from people who are my peers because they’re angry at psychiatry and they don’t want to consider medication because for them that hasn’t been helpful. And I’ve taken a route where I was able to find something that was helpful for me for many years. But everyone is different. We certainly shouldn’t judge other people for what path they find for themselves, whether it’s with medication or with bowling or dancing or—I don’t know. People are amazing. People can find all kinds of things. I think the main thing is that we have faith that recovery is possible and we respect each other because we’re all different. We’re all individuals. And so what works for me, I’m not going to say it’s going to work for the next person, but I will do my best to support you and encourage you and love you. Advice for Those at the Edge Gloria: If someone feels like they’re standing at the edge of their own bridge right now, what would you recommend that they should do? Meghan: If you’re standing at the edge of your bridge—that’s not an easy question, because what we know about people when they’re suicidal is that if they’re seriously very suicidal, their brains are not working in a normal way or regular way. They’re feeling like a level of pressure and things seem so much worse than they would normally seem. So I can’t say that there’s just a simple “do this or do that.” But there’s a condition called suicidal crisis syndrome. And when people are in that state they really need to have medical help. And I don’t say that lightly, but they need medical help because they’re in a physical state that’s out of balance and out of whack. But sometimes just really—we think we have to do something with someone. But just being present for someone—and people have a right to decide what to do with their lives. Not everyone understands this. But if someone is convinced that they do not belong on this planet, I’m going to have a certain amount of respect for them and that belief. But I will try to get help for them to change their mind because I want to change their mind. And reaching out doesn’t mean having all the answers. It just sometimes might mean sitting with someone, letting them either talk or be quiet. Sometimes being silent with someone, being present is the main thing. The Oldest Art in the World Meghan: One fun thing. I just have to tell you this because I just discovered this yesterday. Do you know what the oldest piece of art in the world is? So it was found in Tibet. High Tibet. And it’s 225,000 years old. I mean that’s really before there are a lot of Homo sapiens. But it was fingerprint and footprints in a real playful way. So that’s so old. That’s much older than what I would have guessed. But with our culture and with our problems in our world today, let’s go for longevity. And make art in whatever way works for you. My favorite saying that I say all the time is a quote from the German artist Gerhard Richter: “Art is the highest form of hope.” Connect with Meghan Caughey Website: meghancaughey.com Book: “Mudflower: Surviving Schizophrenia and Suicide Through Art” Upcoming Book: “Making Art from the Edge of the Bridge” Resources Mentioned “Your Brain on Art” by Susan Magnuson and Ivy Ross Oregon Health and Science University Johns Hopkins School of Medicine research on art and medicine This episode explores the powerful intersection of creativity, mental health, and recovery. Meghan Caughey’s journey from surviving schizophrenia to becoming a respected psychiatry professor demonstrates that recovery is possible and can take many beautiful forms. Her philosophy of transforming life’s “mud” into lotus flowers offers hope and practical wisdom for anyone facing mental health challenges.  

If you’re like some female entrepreneurs who cringe at the word “sales,” this episode is for you. As someone who used to dread making sales calls because I was afraid of coming on too strong, I understand the discomfort. But what if I told you that sales could be an act of service rather than manipulation? Show Notes | Transcript “When you approach sales from that heart-centered way of being able to offer service, then it’s easy to make a sale. It really is.” – Gloria Grace Rand In this episode of Live Love Engage, I’m sharing my journey from sales-averse to sales-embracing, and how you can do the same. We’ll explore why women over 50 have unique advantages when it comes to heart-centered selling. We’ll also address potential hurdles like ageism and self-doubt, offering strategies to turn these challenges into opportunities. Discover how to: Approach sales conversations with genuine curiosity Use active listening to uncover client needs Offer solutions that truly serve your audience Handle “no” with grace (it often just means “not yet”) Key insights include: How my first “sale” as an entrepreneur came from a place of genuine desire to help Why women over 50 are twice as likely to create successful businesses The importance of listening deeply in sales conversations Reframing sales as a sacred offering to serve others Practical tips for overcoming sales-related limiting beliefs A Gift for Your Energy Field As a special bonus, I’m offering a brief light language transmission to help clear any unconscious blocks holding you back from sales success. This energetic gift is designed to resonate with your DNA and open new pathways of abundance. Ready to reclaim sales as a heartfelt way to serve others? Tune in for practical wisdom, spiritual insights, and a dash of humor as we navigate the beautiful world of conscious selling. Resources: Schedule a free introductory light language session: https://tidycal.com/gloria3/lightlanguageintro Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Achieve emotional balance with a personalized 30-minute light language session: https://gloriarand.com/light-language-healing/ Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Heart-Centered Selling: Top Strategies for Female Entrepreneurs 50+ Host: Gloria Grace, Confidence Catalyst and Self-Love Advocate Introduction: Reframing Sales Gloria Grace: Namaste. If you’re like I was a few years ago and you hear the word sales and you go “ah,” well, you’re in the right place because today we are reclaiming sales as an act of service, not manipulation, which I think is one of the connotations that sales has. But first, as always, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. I am Gloria Grace, confidence catalyst and self-love advocate. And I empower women over 50 through my signature LOVE method and energy healing to boldly live life on their terms. As I mentioned, sales—sort of like systems a couple of weeks ago—not exactly my favorite subject. And I’ve been procrastinating on doing this episode because even though I know and I understand now that sales really is a service, there’s still part of me at times that just feels icky about it. I’m just going to be honest, and that’s a problem frankly, because it makes it challenging when you’re in business if you’ve got this limiting belief about sales. My Sales Background That’s what I did. I mean, when I first started my business way back in 2009 as an SEO copywriter, helping write content for business websites, that was what I decided to do. Before that I was an employee—I worked in television. I worked for a long time at the public television station down in Miami, Florida on the staff of the Nightly Business Report. Then I left that for a while and worked part-time at another television business news organization, and then finally became a stay-at-home mom for a while. So my previous experience of selling before that was: right after high school I sold shampoo door-to-door as a fundraiser for our band. I was a Girl Scout, so I sold Girl Scout cookies and did well with that. Although truth be told, it was really my mom who did well because she would sell them at work. I sold the most cookies in our troop one year because of that—where she worked, they were hungry for Girl Scout cookies and so I was happy to oblige. I even sold Tupperware for a little while when I was in my twenties, mostly because I had a good friend who was trying to get a Tupperware business going. Since I’d used Tupperware for years—my mom was a Tupperware customer—I thought, “Oh, okay, how hard can it be to sell Tupperware?” Direct sales and me are not a good fit, especially selling physical products. I didn’t enjoy that. My First Real Sale: A Heart-Centered Approach Now when it came to promoting my business as a copywriter, I realized, “Oh, crap, I have to sell, don’t I?” And what I discovered—and this is sort of the crux of what we’re going to get into today—is that my very first sale came about as a result of hearing a presentation by a couple of life coaches. I belonged to a women’s group at the time called Mothers and More. They gave this presentation to our group called “No is a Complete Sentence.” I think I’ve talked about boundaries on the show before and how important they are for men and women, but especially women, because we tend to be caretakers. But we also have to learn to take care of ourselves, and that’s where boundaries come in. We need to learn to say no. Even in business, sometimes we need to say no as well. So anyway, I’m listening to this presentation, and what was going on in my life at the time was that I was taking a course on SEO copywriting. I was studying with Heather Lloyd Martin—she was an SEO copywriter and had a course that I was taking. I was learning about this stuff, and I thought, “Well, you know, just for giggles, I’m going to Google this company and see if I can find them.” They were life coaches in Orlando, and I knew enough about keywords to look for that. So I went to Google and searched for “life coaches Orlando,” and I couldn’t find their company. I looked and looked—went past page one, page two, nothing. Then I finally typed in the name of their company, which was Creating Your Masterpiece. Then they came up on Google. I said, “Let me look at their website. Let me see what the deal is here.” What I found was that they did not have “Orlando life coaching” as a keyword phrase in the back end of their website. Even though I wasn’t done with the course yet, I knew that I could help them. I suspected that if I was able to do this optimization, I had a good feeling that I could help them get onto page one of Google. This was way back in 2009, and it was much easier to get on page one of Google at that time. Now there are billions of websites, so it’s a little more challenging. Overcoming Fear to Make the Sale So I called them up on the phone—no, wait. Did I call them? No, no, no, no. That would be too bold for this introverted girl. No, I sent them an email thanking them for their presentation. I said, “I noticed I was trying to find your website and I couldn’t find it online. This is the reason why I think it’s not showing up.” Then I paused. I didn’t send the email because fear came up for me. I’m like, “Oh, you know, what are they going to say? Are they going to respond positively? Who am I? I’m not even an official copywriter yet. I’m still just taking the course.” All these thoughts started coming into my head, and I was like, “No, I really know what I saw on their website. I know what I saw on the code. I’m sure I could help them.” And so I hit send. I got a call maybe the next day, or maybe later that day. They were like, “Oh my gosh, thank you so much! We just had this website designed and we don’t understand why nobody is calling us. When can we hire you? How can we hire you?” They did hire me to do the work. Sure enough, they showed up on the first page of Google and their phone started ringing. As a result of that, one of the women belonged to a networking group, and she invited me to join it as well, which I did. She would constantly sing my praises, and I was able to get more business that way. The Key Lesson: Sales as Service The lesson I want you to take away from this story is that when you approach sales—and I wasn’t even really thinking of making a sale, I wasn’t really thinking of them being my first customer—I was just coming at it from “Oh my gosh, I need to be able to help these people. They’re not showing up on Google. I know what can be done. I know I can fix it.” When you approach sales from that heart-centered way of being able to offer service, then it’s easy to make a sale. It really is. Advantages for Women Over 50 Now, for those of you who maybe have been listening to my podcast for a little while, you might have noticed that I changed my intro a little bit. I’ve been going through a program where I’ve been upleveling my brand and really honing in on who I want to serve. I really want to serve women over 50. Women over 50 have advantages when it comes to selling because by now you’ve got decades of business experience or even just industry experience that helps you with relationship management. Whether you’ve always been an entrepreneur or you’ve been in the corporate arena, or maybe you haven’t even done that—maybe you’ve held jobs or maybe you’ve been a stay-at-home mom and now that your kids are out of the house, you’re ready to get back in and do something, maybe start a new business. You’ve had to sell. You’ve been selling people your whole life. You started selling as a child because you had to sell your parents on something that you wanted. So we do know innately how to sell. I think it’s just that sales has gotten a bad rap. You think about—and I’m guilty of this as well—my idea of sales is the hard-pressure used car salesman. That’s usually the stereotype: someone who sees a person coming onto the lot and they’re ready to sell you a car when maybe you’re just looking, or they’re going to sell you the more expensive one when you wanted just a simple sedan. Additional Advantages of Women Over 50 in Business You’ve got: Well-established networks of people and personal reputation that you can leverage for referrals and warm sales leads Financial stability – more financial stability at this age Resilience – if you’ve been an entrepreneur for a long time, you’ve built up that resilience muscle Part of being a business owner and dealing with people is that not everybody is going to want to buy from you. You’re going to get a lot of rejections. I know I got a lot of rejections and still do. You have to be able to just let that roll off your back because that’s just the way it is. People have lots of different reasons why they don’t want to buy: The timing isn’t right They don’t have the money right now Maybe they just don’t click with you You’ve got to be okay with that. I know we don’t like to be rejected—at least I don’t like to be rejected—but it comes with the territory. You’ve got to learn to build that resilience muscle and know that there’s going to be ups and downs in this business. A lot of women over 50 really are successful entrepreneurs. In fact, there have been studies that show that you’re actually twice as likely to create a successful business compared to women who are much younger, like in their twenties. Challenges to Be Aware Of There are also some challenges because, let’s face it, as you get older, sometimes there can be ageism or gender bias, and sometimes that can make it challenging to connect with clients or reach other people. Especially if in whatever industry you’re in, perhaps there are younger men out there who you’re trying to compete with, it might be a little bit more challenging. You might have a bout of self-doubt creep in, especially if you’re trying something new or you’re deciding to launch a new product. Hopefully you’ve done some research first to make sure that it is something that people are going to want, not just what you think they need. You have to take into consideration what people want, because what you want and what you need aren’t always the same thing. You want to be able to meet people where they are and provide something that they want, and then give them what they need. Don’t Let Fear Keep You from Making Offers Don’t let fear keep you from making offers. I know sometimes we might be nervous about making people a new offer for a product or service, especially if you’re pivoting into a new direction. But if you know that there is a market for it, number one, you have an obligation to make an offer. Because if you know that you’ve got something that’s going to help somebody and you don’t offer it, then you are depriving them of your gift. When to Say No to Clients I want to mention this because I talked about my clients early on, but those coaches who talked about “no is a complete sentence”—if you have someone who comes to you and wants to hire you, it’s okay for you to say no to them. I know sometimes, if we’re in a financial position where we hate the idea of turning someone down because we have bills to pay, I get that. So maybe sometimes you do have to take a client. But I encourage you to really trust your gut when you are dealing with people, because sometimes there are big red flags out there that we might ignore, but eventually they become really loud and really big in our face. Unless you need to, you might have to either say that you’re not going to work with them, or you might have to let them go as a client and not sell them any more of your services. Example: The Meeting-Loving Client I had a couple of instances in the past when I was doing more copywriting. I had a lovely gentleman who loved to schedule meetings with me, and we would go over these lovely plans of what he wanted to do in his business and how to promote it. I’d spend like an hour with him, and then he wouldn’t implement anything. I finally just—this was early on in my business, so I may not have been as tactful about not wanting to work with him anymore. I think I might have just stopped answering his calls, frankly. But it was really frustrating. Example: The Resistant Client Then I had another woman who had hired me to help her with her LinkedIn profile. I kept making all of these suggestions, and I was on a phone call with her. Every suggestion I made to her, she’s like, “Oh, I tried that. I did that already. That doesn’t work. Oh, no, no, that doesn’t work for me.” Every single thing. As I’m talking to her, I’m getting a stomachache and my body is just tensing up. It was so frustrating because she wouldn’t even give it a try. Some of the things she’d say, “Oh, I heard that doesn’t work now”—so it wasn’t even direct experience. Instead of listening with an open mind. People I like to work with have open minds. Those are my ideal clients—people with open minds. She was not one. So I finally said, “You know what? I’m going to suggest another person that you might be a better fit for, because we obviously are not a good fit.” I blessed her and gave her a couple of referrals of some other people who did this kind of work. I just remember the stress that she caused in my body. That’s not good. We want to work with clients that are going to light us up, that are going to make us feel good, that are going to make us look forward to working with them every day. Especially if you are in the service industry—if you’re a coach or a consultant—you want to be happy with the people you’re working with. Reframing Sales as Sacred Service Let’s talk about sales a little bit more concretely. If at the start of this, your default position when it comes to sales is negative—because I know I’ve been in groups before where they say, “How many people love making sales? Raise your hand if you love making sales.” There will be a few people that raise their hands, but there are going to be others that don’t, because we have this idea of making sales that we think of cold calling or something like that. But if we can reframe that and approach sales as something more sacred, something that is a service that you’re offering—a solution to somebody to make their life easier—that’s ideally what it is. If you’re in business and you’ve got a service or product, somehow it is your intention to have it help someone in some part of their life. It could be their health, their finances, their relationships, whatever it is. Addressing Money and Worth Limiting Beliefs If you’re not as successful in making sales as you would like to be, it could be that you might have some limiting beliefs around money and your worth. I talk about this in my book Live, Love, Engage, because when I started my business, I realized that I did have limiting beliefs about money—things that I had inherited from my mother in particular. The only entrepreneur in our family was my uncle, my mom’s brother, and she thought he was a crook. My parents were both union employees, so they were more focused on employees as opposed to business owners. When I started my own business, I think I had some unconscious beliefs that kept me from really being as successful as I wanted to be. It led to me: Undercharging for some of my services for a very long time Really not valuing my worth as a writer Not promoting myself as much, even though I knew it was important to do, especially because I was dealing with marketing If you’ve got something like that going on—and you may not be aware of it—but if you see the results in that your bottom line is not growing as fast as you’d like, then you might want to do some journaling about that and some meditation. Ask yourself and look back and think about your relationships with money. What were the lessons you learned about money growing up? What did you hear? You might have just picked up on these things and you’re acting it out without even really thinking about it. The Good News: Neuroplasticity But there’s good news here. Our brains have this wonderful capability called neuroplasticity that will allow you to rewire these stories. You can rewrite the script. You can practice affirmations and say, “I am worthy of being paid well for my gifts.” You can start doing some of this work on your own, and you might want to also work with a coach. Actually, just recently I had a wonderful money coach on the show, Mikelann Valterra. You might want to go back and listen to that episode because it was really great. Noble Poverty in Holistic Providers One of the things she talked about, especially for holistic providers, is that we have something called Noble Poverty, where heart-centered service providers don’t want to charge a lot because we want to be able to serve everybody, forgetting that you still have bills to pay just like everybody else. If you undervalue and underprice your services, you’re also giving a perception to other people—to your prospects—that maybe you’re not that great because you don’t charge a lot. Let’s face it, especially in the Western world where a lot of my listeners and viewers are, there is this perception that the more something costs, the better it’s got to be. You think of Walmart items versus items at Nordstrom or, back in the day, Neiman Marcus. My mother loved to go to Neiman Marcus after Christmas and get Christmas ornaments on sale—these really expensive ones, now 50% off. Good deal. The Art of Listening in Sales Once you’ve sort of cleared out some of this stuff, when it gets time to really get into a sales conversation, this is where it really pays to use our ears. What’s the saying? God gave us two ears and one mouth, so we’re to listen more than we speak. There’s a reason. When you are in, let’s say, a discovery call with someone, you really want to listen, listen, listen well to what they’re saying and also even what they’re not saying. This is where your life experience, if you’ve been really working on honing in on your intuition, this is where you can really put that into play and really hold space while you’re listening to someone and give them your undivided attention. Number one, they’re going to love you for that, because as human beings we want to be heard. We want to be seen. We want to be heard. So if you can give that to someone and just ask them questions and say, “Where are you? What’s going on in your life right now?”—and again, this is more for like coaching or consulting as opposed to someone selling a product. That’s a whole different thing, and I’m not going to get into that because that’s not my expertise. If you’re looking for someone who can help you sell products, I’m sure there are other podcasts out there that are all about selling on Etsy and things like that. That’s not me. Full disclosure right here. I’ve been a service provider now for 15-16 years. Oh my gosh, time flies. Key Questions to Ask So, listening. Give them your full attention and ask questions and then let them speak. Ask: “Where are you? What’s going on for them?” “What would life be like if they had this problem solved?” “What happens if they don’t get this problem solved?” Just really listen and then pause. Yes, pausing. And take notes while you’re talking to someone as well, because then you can use their words back to them and say, “I heard you say…” and then you can go deeper into that and explore that. Say things like “What I’m hearing is…” and then you can say, “Well, here’s how I can support you.” And then ask permission: “Does this feel aligned for you?” Handling “No” with Grace Handle that “no” with grace, because “no” oftentimes is just “not yet.” In fact, I was on a call with a woman a few years ago. We were going to do a VIP day together where I was going to help her with redoing her LinkedIn profile. I was big on doing LinkedIn profiles a few years back. She was like, “Yeah, I’d love to do it, but I just can’t do it right now. It’s just not in my budget” or she didn’t have the time or whatever reason. What I did do, though—and I’m getting back in the habit of this, I got off track with email for a while, but I’m getting back into the habit of sending regular emails out to my list—so at the time, I was being very good about that. We stayed in contact. She was getting my emails every week or every two weeks, whatever it was. She came back to me a year later and said, “I’m ready now.” And this is where I learned to value my services: I said, “Well, you know, there’s been a price increase since we talked last year, so it’s going to be this much now.” And she’s like, “Okay.” And there you go. Don’t Be Afraid to Raise Your Prices Don’t be afraid to raise your prices. Hey, like everything else, inflation is out there. And even if there wasn’t inflation, if you have been doing something for a long time, you do want to still raise your rates every so often because you have bills to pay. And again, for this psychology of humans, the more expensive you are, sometimes the more desirable you are. And there’s another benefit: when you get to the point where you are charging a lot—you see these coaches… I think Tony Robbins, I don’t know how much people pay him for sessions, but I’m sure it’s tens of thousands of dollars probably to get private coaching with him. When you’re doing that, you don’t have to coach as many people. So for instance, if you’re a coach or a consultant, the more money you charge, you can kind of cut back on the number of clients. There’s some advantage to that. But if you like the lower-cost thing, some people love offering low-cost membership programs where it’s maybe $20 a month or $40 a month, and then they have a whole bunch of courses and things that people can do on their own. They usually offer group coaching and things like that. There are all sorts of different ways to do that. If you wind up having 100 people or 200 people paying you $20 a month every month or $40 a month every month, you can make a good living doing that as well. Sales Training and Goal Setting There’s a whole other thing you can go into—I’ve attended sales trainings and I highly recommend those—where you go in and look at how much money you want to earn and then figure out how many sales you need to make to earn that. You can figure out, of your offerings—if you have something that’s a $100 offer, something that’s a $1,000 offer, something that’s a $5,000 offer—you can see how many people or how many sales you’re going to need to, let’s say you have a $100,000 goal to earn a year. You can divide that up by 12 and do the math. That’s not what this podcast is about. There are wonderful people out there who teach this stuff. I am not one of those people, but I just want to put it out there so you have it. Main Takeaway: Sacred Service I’m looking at some notes here of all the different things that I could talk about, and I just don’t want to because I want this to be more of a high-level look at sales. My main point that I want to stress is that you treat sales as a service and treat it as a sacred offering that you’re making to someone. I’m sure if you’re listening to this podcast, you’re someone with a big heart. The podcast is called Live Love Engage, so I’m sure you are someone who wants to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically, which is what I always say at the end of the show. You’re not someone who just wants to go in and make as much money as possible and doesn’t care who you hurt. No, you are someone who wants to help people and you want to grow your business and you want to pay your bills, and you probably want some time freedom and some financial freedom to go on vacation and to have fun and to spoil your family with gifts or trips or something. Just always remember to be of service to someone when you’re talking to them on the phone and think of how you can help them. Like I talked about at the beginning, my very first foray into trying to promote my services as a copywriter wasn’t so much about making the sale as I just felt sorry for these people because they had this beautiful website and nobody was finding them. I’m like, “That’s not right. They need…” And I heard them and they were great. I was very impressed with their presentation. I’m like, “More people need to hire these people. More people need to hire these women. So I want them to be known.” That’s how I came at it, with that open heart to help them. And they were like, “Great! Help us.” Light Language Energy Healing I think that’s going to do it for now on this topic, but I want to do one other thing as we’re winding down today’s episode. One of the things that I love to do—and as I mentioned at the beginning, I offer energy healing—so I want to share with you a light language message to help you to release perhaps some unconscious limiting beliefs that might be keeping you from being as successful in your business as you’d like to be, to help you to be able to have more confidence to go out and be of service, to sell your services. What I’m going to share right now is a message that is intended for your heart to understand. It’s not something necessarily you’re going to be able to translate because it’ll sound like a foreign language, but it’s got energy in it, and it will resonate with your DNA and resonate with your energy field to help you to clear away any blocks that you might not even be aware of. What I encourage you to do is, if you’re driving while you’re listening to this, pause the podcast and come back to it later when you can be somewhere where you can put your feet on the floor, close your eyes, and set the intention that the message that you’re going to receive will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of others. That’s what I am setting that intention as well. [Light language message delivered] Just a little taste of light language. If you would like to know more about that, schedule a free session with me. We can do a short little one. I’ll give you a little bit more detail about what light language is, and I’ll have the information for that in the show notes. If you’re watching this on YouTube, you’ll see it right there. Let’s schedule a time to chat. I’ll do a little bit more because it’s great when I can share one-on-one with someone because then I can address your particular needs. And of course, if you want to just go ahead and book a session with me, you can do that as well. I offer half-hour sessions and I’ll give you a lot longer message than what I just shared with you right now. I’ll also have that in the show notes, too. Closing Make sure that you are subscribed to Live Love Engage on your favorite podcast platform or on YouTube, because then you’ll be notified when next week’s episode drops. That one features Meghan Caughey, who is going to share with us how creativity can literally rewire your brain and become your secret weapon for mental wellness. It was funny when I was saying “literally”—if any of you are familiar with Rob Lowe, he loves to say “literally.” He has his own podcast as well, which I’ve listened to. I’ve been a fan of his for years and years, especially from The West Wing and then Parks and Recreation days. But anyway, I think I said it normally—I would just say “literally,” but he loves to say “literally.” Thank you for listening. Thank you for watching. Until next time, go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically. Key Takeaways Sales is service – Approach selling from a heart-centered place of helping others solve problems Women over 50 have advantages – Decades of experience, established networks, financial stability, and resilience Listen more than you speak – Use discovery calls to truly understand client needs Address money blocks – Examine limiting beliefs about worth and money inherited from family It’s okay to say no – Trust your gut about difficult clients Value your services – Don’t be afraid to raise prices; higher prices can indicate higher value “No” often means “not yet” – Stay in touch with prospects who aren’t ready now Resources Mentioned Book: Live. Love. Engage. by Gloria Grace Previous Episode: Money coach Mikelann Valterra discussion Next Episode: Meghan Caughey on creativity and mental wellness SEO Training: Heather Lloyd Martin’s SEO copywriting course For more information about Gloria Grace’s services, energy healing sessions, and the L.O.V.E. method, visit the show notes or schedule a free consultation.  

Conventional wisdom says the keys to entrepreneurial success lie in cultivating problem-solving, communication, and leadership skills. But what if I told you that the secret to success starts with your mindset? Many women entrepreneurs play small in their business because of limiting beliefs like, “you’re not enough.” It’s time to break free from those limiting beliefs and embrace your authentic, empowered self. In this enlightening episode, I sit down with Kamini Wood, a multi-talented entrepreneur, author, podcaster, and certified life coach, to explore how we can overcome the barriers holding us back. Show Notes | Transcript “Awareness is only part of the way there. It’s that doorway to change. Once we become aware of it, it’s really up to us to then decide what… given my values of today and what’s true about me today, what is it that I actually want to live into?” – Kamini Wood As the founder and CEO of Live Joy Your Way and creator of the Authentic Me method, Kamini helps high achievers overcome anxiety, stress, perfectionism, and more by empowering them to release trauma and rediscover their true selves. As we navigate the complexities of entrepreneurship and personal growth, Kamini offers invaluable insights on recognizing and overcoming limiting beliefs. In this episode, you’ll discover: How to identify hidden limiting beliefs that may be sabotaging your business growth The importance of setting healthy boundaries as a form of self-care and relationship-building Practical techniques for cultivating self-compassion and mindfulness in your daily life Strategies to overcome perfectionism and take action in your business Key insights include: Why curiosity is a powerful tool for personal growth and resilience The role of gratitude in building optimism and bouncing back from challenges How to reframe past experiences and create empowering new narratives The importance of understanding your values and needs to live authentically Kamini also introduces us to her Authentic Me method, a powerful approach to helping individuals uncover their true selves by aligning with their core values and needs. This method offers a fresh perspective on personal development and entrepreneurial success. Whether you’re struggling with imposter syndrome, perfectionism, or simply feeling stuck in your business, this conversation offers practical strategies and compassionate guidance to help you break through. Tune in to start your journey towards becoming the authentic, empowered entrepreneur you were meant to be! Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Kamini Website: kaminiwood.com Instagram & Facebook: @itsauthenticme Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Compassion and Curiosity: The Keys to Entrepreneurial Success Episode Transcript – Live Love Engage Podcast Host: Gloria Grace Guest: Kamini Wood Episode Introduction Gloria Grace: Namaste. Tired of playing small in your business because you’ve got this inner voice telling you that you’re not enough? Well, our guest today is going to explain how you can break through the barriers holding you back so you can finally embrace the authentic, empowered entrepreneur or professional that you were born to be. Before we get to her, and it’s going to be awesome, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, the founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. Meet Today’s Guest: Kamini Wood My guest today is Kamini Wood, and she is a multi-hyphenate person. She’s an entrepreneur, an author, a podcaster, and certified life coach who specializes in helping high achievers overcome: Anxiety Stress Perfectionism ADHD Toxic relationships As the founder and CEO of Live Joy Your Way and the creator of the Authentic Me method, Kamini empowers individuals to break free from limiting beliefs, release trauma, and rediscover their authentic selves. This is actually Kamini’s second appearance on Live Love Engage, so I want to officially welcome you back to our podcast. Kamini Wood: Thank you for having me back. I’m excited to be here with you. Recognizing Limiting Beliefs in Business Gloria: Limiting beliefs often lead to things like imposter syndrome for entrepreneurs in particular, but it’s not always easy to recognize those things. How can we realize that maybe that’s why we’re sabotaging our business growth? We might have beliefs that we aren’t even really aware of that could be causing that type of behavior. Kamini: That’s such a great question, because I do think that oftentimes we are operating with stories, narratives, and limiting beliefs that we just don’t know are there. We’ve never taken time to actually evaluate what are the things that we’re saying to ourselves and where are those things coming from. Common Entrepreneurial Limiting Beliefs Especially as entrepreneurs, starting my business, there were a lot of limiting beliefs around: Could I do it? Am I enough to do it? Am I smart enough? Am I savvy enough? Am I committed enough? There’s all of the “enough” limiting beliefs. The Power of Curious Questions For many of us, what we have to do is start asking ourselves deeper questions. If we notice that our inner critic is constantly nitpicking, or we notice certain patterns that we’re seeing over and over again, we need to start asking more curious questions: Where is that stemming from? Where is the belief or storyline coming from? What is that story? Once we’re able to identify and become aware of what that belief is or what the narrative is, then we have an opportunity to ask ourselves: “What do I want to do about this?” Awareness is only part of the way there—it’s that doorway to change. Once we become aware of it, it’s really up to us to decide what we want to do. Given my values of today and what’s true about me today, what is it that I actually want to live into? Do I want to keep living into this old story? The Origins of Limiting Beliefs Gloria: Where do some of these limiting beliefs come from? I had limiting beliefs around money, and when I started digging into it, I was surprised where these things came from. Kamini: I have found that oftentimes the limiting beliefs that we have are deep-rooted and they’re from: Childhood Sources Some experience or message we received in childhood Cultural upbringing Familial upbringing Societal influences Adult Experiences However, it’s not just limited to when we were younger. A lot of us also have acquired certain limiting beliefs throughout our life. They come from either: Messages we receive Experiences we go through and we make them mean something That perpetuates the story or the limiting belief. The Power of Reinterpretation Gloria: I made up a story about something that happened to me when I was a kid. Going through a personal development workshop, I was journaling and all of a sudden it dawned on me: What if I totally misinterpreted the reaction that I had experienced? What if instead of them criticizing me, they were actually bragging about it? It totally rocked my world because I had just made up this story for years—like 50 years at that point. Our brains are amazing, but sometimes they over-rotate. Releasing and Reframing Limiting Beliefs Gloria: Once we’ve identified those beliefs, how can we start to either release them or reframe them so that we’re able to start living that life that we want to lead? Kamini: Really, for me, what it comes down to is a couple of things: 1. Focus on Present Truth Ask: What’s actually true about me at this current stage of my life? At the age that I’m at here and now, what’s actually true? Oftentimes if we’re dealing with limiting beliefs, we’re dealing with an old story from a younger time period. 2. Connect with Your Values Lean into your own core values around what is meaningful to you. When you’re thinking about these limiting beliefs and you’ve identified them, you know what’s actually true about you, and you’re aware of your values. 3. Take Values-Based Action Now you can start taking action. The frame that I move into is: Now that I know what’s actually true about me today, and I know these things drive me, what is the values-based action I’m going to take? That’s how we start moving through the limiting belief and rewriting whatever that narrative is. We have the ownership to do that, but we have to figure out what is actually meaningful to us and then figure out what action we want to take based on that. Rewriting Your Story Gloria: We can actually rewrite the stories, even the story that happened in the past that formed that limiting belief. You could just make up a new ending and create one that’s empowering, because the brain doesn’t know any better. Kamini: Absolutely. In those periods where we had that story or meaning that we made, we get to say, “And what else?” It’s not toxic positivity—we’re not saying let’s just pretend. It’s more like, “I can look at this differently.” This is also how we can learn to work through and heal from trauma. Trauma is not the event—it’s how we responded to it. If we keep reliving the same event the same way, we’re not actually healing from the trauma. Instead, we start building up the ability to look at the trauma with a different lens. Dealing with Recurring Painful Memories Gloria: I woke up in the middle of the night and started replaying my sister’s last day when she passed away. I was like, why am I doing this? I’ve already healed, forgiven myself, and let go. Brain, stop. Even though I’ve done a lot of work on myself, stuff still comes up from time to time. Kamini: I think that’s so true. Sometimes we’ve done the work, we have healed, we’ve continued to move forward, and yet those things can still pop back up. What you just said—we try to say “brain, stop”—and it’s almost like we start shaming ourselves for being human and having these things come back up. A Curious Approach to Painful Memories Instead, it’s like: “Oh, that’s really curious. I wonder what part of me has been activated and what does that part need to hear?” The way through it for me is to talk to that part: What are you trying to communicate? What is it that I might need to hear right now? What might that part need to hear? Instead of going down the shaming rabbit hole of “I’ve healed from this, why is this coming back up?” which is very shaming, it’s: “Okay, interesting. What is this part about? Why would this part be bringing her back into my memory bank? What does it need to hear right now?” The Importance of Healthy Boundaries Gloria: Let’s talk about boundaries. I had a phone call from someone, and I was like, I’m not answering it this morning. I’m busy right now. In the past, I would answer the phone immediately. Why Boundaries Matter Kamini: I had to learn this myself. I am a people pleaser by nature, so my giving and over-giving was something I had to grow through. Learning what boundaries are and why they’re important seemed foreign to me. What I learned about boundaries is they are actually the way to build healthier relationships because we’re communicating what works for us and what doesn’t. Having boundaries for ourselves allows us to do self-care so that when we’re showing up in relationships or in life in general, we’re coming from a full and complete place rather than from a depleted place. For me, boundaries have really become reframed as self-care as well as a power move to build better, healthier relationships. Practical Boundary Examples From a personal perspective, being a mom of five, I’ve had to learn to set boundaries around what I can and can’t do. I was constantly trying to give and give and give. Examples include: Instead of saying yes immediately, taking time to say “let me think about that” or “let me check my schedule” Putting a boundary with myself—not immediately saying yes but giving myself time to pause and think Asking: Does this actually fit? Can I actually add this to my plate? As an entrepreneur, being able to say yes or no to phone calls. I get inundated with people trying to sell me their services. When I first started out, I felt bad that I needed to say no. Now I recognize it’s not bad or wrong for me to take my time to figure out who I’m willing to potentially say yes to versus who I’m going to pass on. Understanding Self-Compassion Gloria: Setting boundaries is an example of self-compassion. What’s your definition of that, and why is it important to practice? Kamini: I love talking about self-compassion—it’s my bread and butter. I was so hard on myself, I didn’t even know what self-compassion meant. I would automatically go into judgment. The Three Components of Self-Compassion 1. Kindness Over Judgment Self-compassion is kindness over judgment. It’s recognizing that maybe something didn’t go the way we wanted or expected. But instead of going into judgment mode or letting the inner critic beat us up, it’s acknowledging: “That didn’t go the way I wanted it to. These are the things I can take away from it, or this is what I learned.” 2. Common Humanity The concept that I’m not in this alone. Other people have had similar experiences—maybe not the same experience because we all experience things differently. But it’s okay to lean on other people and talk about it. We don’t have to feel isolated or feel that we’re weird or there’s something wrong with us because we’re dealing with some challenge. 3. Mindfulness Coming to the here and now, this present moment. Being a high achiever myself, it was constantly about “what’s next, what’s next.” Mindfulness really comes back to: Where am I, right here, right now, rather than constantly living into the future or ruminating about the past. Practical Mindfulness Techniques Gloria: What practices do you follow or recommend to cultivate mindfulness? Kamini: I am a person that doesn’t like big, long, drawn-out practices. I needed to have them in small bite-sized pieces that I can fit throughout my day. Simple Mindfulness Practices Box Breathing In between clients, I’ll take a couple of minutes to do my box breathing. Five Senses Check-In Being a high achiever, I also deal with anxiety, so I’ve learned to build a different relationship with my anxiety. Instead of going into shaming, I notice: “Wow, I’m feeling anxious or worked up.” So I’ll dial into my five senses. The 5-4-3-2-1 Technique: 5 things I can hear right at this moment 4 different things I can see from where I’m sitting 3 things I can touch around me 2 things I can smell 1 taste I can taste in my mouth By going from sense to sense, you’re really tuning into one thing at a time and giving your brain something to focus on besides all the thoughts it might have been having before. You’re coming into this moment right here. The Authentic Me Method Gloria: Talk to me about this Authentic Me method that you created. Kamini: I developed the name Authentic Me because I was focused on learning to let go of external validation and really saying, “This is who I am.” I developed this to support people in finding who they are authentically. The Three Pillars 1. Values Getting very familiar with what are your individual values. 2. Needs What are your individual needs? So many of us don’t actually ever name what it is that we need—not just in relationship, but in general: What do I need in work and professional life? What do I need in my relationships? What do I need in my health and wellness? What do I need in my financial world? 3. Limiting Beliefs Working through those limiting beliefs. Once you have these three pillars of really figuring out who you are as an individual person, then you can break down where you might be feeling stuck and work through setting goals and aspirations from that perspective. Overcoming Perfectionism Gloria: How can someone who thinks things have to be perfect before they launch—like getting that website just right—let go of that limiting belief? Kamini: It’s definitely a limiting belief and easier said than done. I want to acknowledge that. Strategies for Perfectionism Start Small Find smaller things that you’re willing to say, “This is good enough for me to try.” If you’re starting out and the website feels too big, what is something smaller potentially? Then work your way up to the thing that feels really scary. Name Your Fears We have to name what we’re afraid of. What are we scared of? If the website isn’t perfect, what is the worst thing that could happen? When we answer that question, the worst thing probably is missing some sales. But what will you do then? You’ll fix the things that you catch. So we don’t have to wait for it to be perfect. We can launch what we have now and continue working on it. Sometimes our perfectionist mind gets stuck thinking it has to be a certain way before we launch, but really it’s a living thing. You can continue to work on it even while it’s been launched. Building Resilience Without Falling into Old Patterns Gloria: How can we cultivate resilience without falling back into old patterns? Kamini: There are several things we can work on to build resilience: Key Resilience Strategies 1. Self-Compassion Really leaning into kindness over judgment. 2. Curiosity Get more curious with what’s happening versus judgment. “This is interesting. What can I learn from this?” 3. Finding the Right Thing Looking for the right thing even in challenging times. Not toxic positivity, but can I find something I can actually have even an ounce of gratitude for, even in the most challenging moments? That reminds us there’s still something we can continue to build off of. 4. Gratitude Practice It has been shown that if we can build a gratitude practice, we end up building that optimistic outlook muscle. When we’re thinking about resilience—how we can bounce back from challenges—being able to build our resilience comes down to having gratitude and appreciation, no matter what’s happening around us. Gloria: I always make sure that before I go to bed at night, I’m listing at least three things that I’m grateful for. Even in days that have been more challenging, that gratitude practice is a game changer because it really does shift from our negativity bias. Current Curiosities and Future Directions Gloria: What are you curious about right now? Kamini: I’m curious about lots of different things: Professional Curiosities The next iteration of how I add in trauma-informed approaches Bringing trauma-informed talks into parenting and the school system Continuing to evolve—I’m always curious about people and understanding how emotions are data packets Personal Curiosities As a parent, I’m curious what’s going to evolve for my kids as the older ones move into adulthood, and I still have my younger couple here at home with me. Key Takeaways for Entrepreneurs Kamini: The biggest thing, especially for those who are entrepreneurs or starting out, is really leaning into kindness over judgment. Also recognizing when those limiting beliefs are holding you back and not shaming yourself for those limiting beliefs, but just deciding that you’re ready to change the story. That’s a huge power move. Gloria: Sometimes we’re not even aware of those conversations we’re having with ourselves. It takes having an outside person to be able to hear it because we have these blinders on. Negative self-talk can become so habitual that we don’t hear it anymore. Connect with Kamini Wood Website: KaminiWood.com Social Media: Facebook and Instagram @itsauthenticme Closing Thoughts Thank you for joining us on Live Love Engage. If you received value from this episode, be sure to subscribe on your favorite platform. Until we meet again, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically. This transcript has been edited for length and clarity while maintaining the authentic voice and key insights from both speakers.

Does the thought of needing to streamline business processes make you cringe, even though you know it’s a necessity? You’re not alone. As spiritual entrepreneurs, especially those of us over 50, we often resist the notion of creating structured processes. But what if I told you that embracing systems could be the key to unlocking more freedom and joy in your work? Show Notes | Transcript “Even though they (business processes) can be the bane of our existence at times, but when you get them working right and working for you, then it really works to just lighten your load and take some stress off of your shoulders.” – Gloria Grace Rand In this Live. Love. Engage. episode, I’m diving deep into the world of business systems – why they matter, how they can help, and how to approach them without losing your mind (or your authenticity). Why Systems Matter for Your Business Systems might seem like a buzzkill for creative entrepreneurs, but they’re actually your secret weapon for: Streamlining repetitive tasks – freeing up your time for what truly matters Ensuring consistency and quality – so you’re not reinventing the wheel every time Scaling your business – because you can’t do it all yourself forever Improving work-life balance – a top challenge for 63% of women over 50, according to my recent LinkedIn poll Key insights include: What common hurdles can keep you from implementing systems Why it’s important not to let these obstacles hold you back The key areas where business systems make a big difference How to determine which system is right for you Why outsourcing might be the best way to streamline your business A Gift for You: Discover Your Personal Power Archetype As an example of how systems can work for you, I’ve created a free quiz to help you uncover your personal power archetype. This automated system delivers personalized results and follow-up emails, providing value to you while supporting my business. Go to bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz to take the quiz! Tune in to this episode for more practical tips, a dash of spiritual wisdom (including a special light language transmission), and guidance on making systems your ally in creating a business that truly serves you. Resources: Discover your Personal Power Archetype: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz Join the Soulful Women’s Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – How to Streamline Business Processes Without Losing Your Soul Welcome to Live Love Engage with Gloria Grace Introduction: Why Systems Matter for Your Business Namaste! Does the idea of putting systems in your business make you jump for joy or cry in frustration? Today we’re tackling this subject because I want you to be able to make systems your friend and not your nemesis. Welcome to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I’m Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower mission-driven women over 50 to boldly live life on their terms through my signature LOVE method and energy healing—and yes, systems. The Reality Check: Why We Resist Systems Systems are something I’ve resisted in the past, but they’re a big part of helping entrepreneurs create more flow in their business and make it run more efficiently. I recently ran a poll on LinkedIn asking about people’s biggest challenges—particularly women over 50—and 63% chose work-life balance. One response that relates to today’s episode said: “I can create all day long, but when it comes to creating the technical systems such as marketing apparatus needed to implement what I create, it taxes my brain.” I can absolutely relate to this sentiment. Common Reasons Entrepreneurs Resist Systems Cost Concerns Initial investment in software Training expenses for employees Potential hardware requirements Budget strain considerations Complexity and Learning Curves Overwhelming software features Time investment required Frustration with new tools “I just want it done” mentality Integration Challenges Multiple tools that don’t work together “Shiny object syndrome” with new tools Difficulty creating seamless workflows Why Systems Are Essential for Business Growth As solopreneurs, we wear many different hats—marketing, bookkeeping, sales, customer service—while also servicing our clients. With only 24 hours in a day, systems become crucial for: Streamlining Operations Reducing repetitive tasks: If you’re doing the same thing over and over, it’s a perfect opportunity for systemization Eliminating manual work: Free up time for higher-value activities Increasing efficiency: Six-step processes become automated workflows Ensuring Consistency and Quality Standardized processes prevent “reinventing the wheel” Clear expectations for employees and contractors Professional client experience every time Supporting Growth and Scalability Training and onboarding: Documented procedures make it easier to bring on team members Client onboarding: Systematic approach to welcoming new clients Accountability and visibility: Clear roles, responsibilities, and performance monitoring Long-term Financial Benefits Cost savings: More efficient operations reduce overhead Higher profits: Automation leads to better margins Reduced errors: Systematic approaches minimize costly mistakes Types of Business Systems Every Entrepreneur Needs 1. Accounting and Financial Management Popular tools: QuickBooks, FreshBooks Track sales, revenues, and profits Monitor quarterly performance Prepare for tax season 2. Task and Project Management Options include: Traditional: Physical planners and notebooks Digital: Trello, Asana, Notion Calendar-based: Google Calendar for recurring tasks Personal note: I have a love-hate relationship with some of these tools. Sometimes I prefer old-school methods, and that’s okay! Use what works for you. 3. Customer Relationship Management (CRM) Popular platforms: HubSpot, HighLevel, 17 Hats, Zoho Manage contacts and leads Track customer interactions Automate follow-up sequences 4. Marketing and Content Creation Systems Email Marketing Tools Platforms: Constant Contact, Mailchimp, ActiveCampaign Automated sequences: Set up drip campaigns for new subscribers Lead magnet delivery: Automatic follow-up for downloads Sales sequences: Nurture prospects without manual intervention Social Media Management Tools: Buffer, Hootsuite, or native platform scheduling Schedule posts in advance Maintain consistent presence Cross-platform content distribution Note: I now schedule directly through Facebook and LinkedIn to avoid potential algorithm penalties from third-party tools. Design and Video Creation Visual content: Canva for graphics and infographics Video tools: ClipChamp for video creation Opus Pro for turning podcast episodes into short social media videos 5. Communication Systems Meeting platforms: Zoom, Microsoft Teams, Google Meet Messaging: WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, Google Spaces Virtual client meetings Team communication Client support channels 6. E-commerce and Payment Processing Payment systems: Stripe, PayPal, merchant accounts E-commerce platforms: Shopify for product sales Secure payment processing Inventory management Order fulfillment automation Specialized Systems for Content Creators For this podcast, I use several specialized tools: Recording: Streamyard for live streaming and recording Post-production: Capshow for creating show notes and social media content Content repurposing: Both Opus Pro and Capshow for video clips Before Implementing Any System: Key Questions to Ask The Time Audit Exercise Make a list of tasks that take you longer than they should. Time yourself on these activities—this data will help you identify where systems could have the biggest impact. The Stress vs. Value Assessment Ask yourself: Does this bring me closer to or further from my authentic self? Will this system bring me peace and joy, or cause more grief? Should I invest in software or hire someone who’s already proficient? Listen to your intuition. Sometimes it’s more cost-effective to hire an expert rather than spending your time learning new systems. A Personal Success Story: Automated Quiz System I created a quiz using Try Interact called “Discover Your Personal Power Archetype” for midlife entrepreneurs. This system includes: Interactive quiz functionality Automated email sequences based on results Personalized follow-up content Lead generation and nurturing You can check it out at: bit.ly/PersonalPowerQuiz The Role of AI in Modern Business Systems Artificial intelligence is transforming how we approach business systems. I used AI to help refine the email sequences for my quiz, making the process more efficient and effective. Note: I’ll be diving deeper into AI and systems in an upcoming interview with expert Shilpa Lewis—stay tuned! Key Takeaways: Making Systems Work for You Benefits of Well-Implemented Systems: Process standardization across your business Software integration that creates seamless workflows Automated workflows that save time and reduce errors Consistency in client experience and business operations Scalability for business growth Peace of mind knowing important tasks are handled Trust Your Intuition Your higher self knows what’s best for your business. If you’re a Manifesting Generator in Human Design (like me), sit on decisions for a day. Meditate, journal, and see what feels right before making investments in new systems. Remember Your Why Most of us started our businesses for time freedom and financial freedom. While systems can initially feel like a burden, when implemented correctly, they actually provide the freedom we’re seeking by: Reducing stress levels Freeing up time for client service Allowing focus on big-picture strategy Creating space for authentic content creation Looking Ahead Systems really can become your friend through process standardization, software integration, and automated workflows. They help you become more efficient, consistent, and positioned for sustainable growth. The key is tuning into your intuition throughout the process. Your higher self truly knows what’s best for you and your business. Don’t forget to subscribe to Live Love Engage on your favorite podcast platform or YouTube for upcoming episodes, including my interview with Kamini Wood about breaking free from limiting beliefs to rediscover your authentic self. Until next time, go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically. About the Host Gloria Grace is the founder of Align to Shine Academy, empowering mission-driven women over 50 to boldly live life on their terms through her signature LOVE method and energy healing. She offers free 15-minute introductory light language sessions via Zoom. Resources Mentioned in This Episode Quiz: Personal Power Archetype Quiz Tools mentioned: QuickBooks, Trello, Asana, Notion, HubSpot, ActiveCampaign, Canva, Streamyard, Try Interact Free session: 15-minute introductory light language session (link in show notes)

Facing an empty nest can feel like the end of an era. But what if it’s just the beginning? In this episode, I sit down with Jennifer Dale, founder of Honest Heart Journeys, to explore how travel, sisterhood, and intuition create the perfect storm for awakening your authentic self and transforming your life and business from the heart outward. Show Notes | Transcript “Travel gives us that kind of opportunity where we examine our own lives and examine our own selves. Hopefully take time to reflect while we’re doing it.” – Jennifer Dale As a fellow advocate for women over 50, Jennifer shares her passion for creating transformative travel experiences that empower, foster personal growth, deep connections, and the courage to embrace new adventures at any stage of life. In this episode, you’ll discover: How to harness the power of travel to gain fresh perspectives on your life and business The importance of intergenerational connections in fostering personal growth and healing Why sisterhood and authentic relationships are crucial for women in their 50s and beyond How to use themed journeys to facilitate deep personal transformation and spiritual growth Key insights include: The healing potential of women-only travel experiences for those navigating life transitions How cultural immersion can challenge our perceptions and redefine our values The role of mindfulness and reflection in maximizing the benefits of travel Why now is the perfect time to experience the world and cultivate cross-cultural understanding Jennifer also shares inspiring stories of transformation from her Honest Heart Journeys, including a powerful account of a woman who found her self-worth through the support of her travel companions. Whether you’re seeking to reignite your passion for life, heal from past experiences, or gain fresh insights for your business, this conversation offers a compelling invitation to explore the world and yourself. Tune in to discover how embracing new experiences and authentic connections can lead to profound personal and professional growth! Connect with Jennifer Website: www.honestheartjourneys.com Instagram: @honestheartjourneys Facebook: Honest Heart Journeys Resources: My appearance on the Honest Heart Journeys Podcast: Episode 20 – Love Into Your Worth Join the Soulful Women’s Network www.facebook.com/groups/soulfulwomensnetwork Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – From Empty Nest to Empowered: Travel as a Catalyst Episode featuring Jennifer Dale, founder of Honest Heart Journeys Introduction: Welcome to Live Love Engage Namaste. Imagine stepping away from life’s noise to discover your deepest wisdom alongside women who truly see you. Today’s guest is going to help us explore how travel, sisterhood, and intuition create the perfect storm for awakening your authentic self and transforming your business from the heart outward. Welcome to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. Meet Jennifer Dale: Founder of Honest Heart Journeys Jennifer Dale is the founder of Honest Heart Journeys, a transformative travel community for women over 50. She’s a blogger, speaker, and host of her own podcast called The Honest Heart. Jennifer is passionate about sisterhood, intergenerational understanding, and soulful adventures that foster personal growth, deep connections, and the courage to embrace new experiences at any age of life. The Inspiration Behind Honest Heart Journeys: Serving Women Over 50 Gloria: What inspired you to create Honest Heart Journeys specifically for women over 50? Navigating Life Transitions and Change Jennifer: I think that demographic is just navigating so much transition and change in our lives. We’re empty nesters. Our marriage status may have changed. For me, I was at a point where I was leaving my career behind and really thinking about reconnecting with my life and considering my legacy. A Personal Healing Journey During COVID It really all began when I was on my own personal healing journey in 2020, just as COVID started. I left a job right at the beginning of COVID that had left me feeling pretty empty and frustrated. I had to reconnect with who I was. I had been working with teen women, so it was a beautiful time to move away from what I’d been doing and reconnect with my husband. We settled in an entirely different city and I really needed to heal from that situation and redefine myself. Redefining Womanhood and Sisterhood I recognize that the women I’d been working with, coming out of my own experience, it was time to redefine womanhood and sisterhood and how we are in community with one another. There are so many stereotypes about women and how they treat one another. Worth is a big thing so many of us deal with. I wanted to lift that sense that women can be there for one another. We don’t have to compare and criticize. I was ready to look forward and nurture community, which is something I’ve done in my career for years. Building Community: Attracting Women Seeking Authentic Connection Gloria: Are you attracting women who are already friends, or people looking to form new friendships through these experiences? Breaking Down Barriers and Dropping Masks Jennifer: It’s really both. There definitely are women in our demographic who are dropping a lot of labels and cultural expectations. Many come feeling trepidatious, saying “Are you kidding me? Spending all this time with a bunch of women? I’m not so sure I’m up for that.” But they find that really honest, genuine connection with other people. Many have come home and said, “I don’t know what just happened. I was there with you for 10 days, and I feel like all the women I met know me better than friends at home who’ve known me for years.” Intergenerational Connections and Healing We also have intergenerational experiences where a mother brings a daughter, and you see healing in their relationship happening before you. Sisters celebrate milestones together, creating memories they’ll always remember. The Power of Intergenerational Wisdom Gloria: I love how you foster intergenerational connections. As we get older, we have wisdom to pass along, but younger generations can teach us too. Learning from Each Other Across Generations Jennifer: I think we’re at a stage where there’s less hierarchy. Technology has changed so much in our lifetime that we’re listening more to younger generations. They have access to information and can teach us. My hope is that the wisdom we’ve gained – caring less about what others think and living into our lessons learned – is respected more. In our trips, we explore other cultures where there’s more appreciation for elders, and I see younger women appreciating us more and having more patience. Overcoming Fears About Women-Only Travel Gloria: What fears do you see before women commit to these journeys, and how do you help them through that? Understanding Sisterhood as a Verb Jennifer: The word “sisterhood” itself has mixed connotations. People might think of sorority experiences or surface-level interactions. I love thinking of sistering as a verb – to sister someone, to really walk beside them. Creating Deep Connections Through Shared Experiences What happens on these trips is women begin to recognize we connect around things we have in common – situations, lessons, challenges, questions we’re asking. I’ve seen two women who both lost husbands in deep conversation, one sharing how she coped because the other had just experienced loss. Using Books and Workshops for Common Ground We always have a book that we read before we go, giving us common language and experience to connect around. The conversation goes deep because of that book. We do workshops before traveling so we’re familiar with what we’re doing. Example: The Camino de Santiago and Byron Katie’s Work Every year we take a Camino trip on the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage in Spain. We do the work of Byron Katie, learning how to question the beliefs in our lives that cause us suffering. We do it together and companion each other through the process. Finding Your Tribe: The Importance of Community After 50 Jennifer: Those support systems are built in for us early on – standing next to another mother at the soccer field, collaborating at the water cooler. But as we leave the office and our kids fly the nest, we ask: “What’s my purpose now? Who are my people? What’s my tribe?” Ready for Growth and Spiritual Development We need that so much now, and frankly, we’re more ready for it than ever because we’re curious. We want to grow spiritually, continue to be free. We’ve shed a lot of stuff and responsibilities that kept us busy for so many years. I love the idea that the best is yet to come, not behind me. The Travel and Personal Development Revolution Gloria: Each decade for me has gotten better than the last. I’m anticipating living a long time and want each decade to continue improving. The Fastest Growing Travel Segment Jennifer: When I started this during COVID, I realized the number one fastest growing segment of travel is women traveling. Women are going everywhere with a sense of courage and wanting to continue being active. Fusing Two Growing Industries Personal and spiritual development was also coming into play. We’re fusing those two industries – travel and personal development – into one experience. I’m a believer that experiential learning in community is by far the best way to grow. The Need for Community in Growth One thing I learned on our first trip: we need to go inward for our own growth, but we really need each other. We need companionship to compare notes, celebrate us, or keep us accountable. Practical Application: How Travel Transforms Personal and Business Perspectives Gloria: How can women entrepreneurs use travel experiences to help clarify their vision or offerings? The Power of Unplugging Jennifer: There’s nothing like travel to unplug you from your daily mindset, responsibilities, relationships, and distractions. The unplugging itself gives you a fresh start because you show up differently and don’t know what’s going to happen. Cultural Immersion for Perspective Travel itself gives you a fresh start. Along with themed trips, there might be a culture that makes you think about your own life or question your values. We’re going to Kenya in 2027, and having time with the Maasai is powerful. Redefining Values Through Experience I used to take students to Peru where they saw incredible kids without shoes or floors in their homes, but with huge smiles and generous hearts. It made these kids who had everything back in the States redefine wealth and think about what wealth really means. Specific Destinations and Their Transformative Themes Vietnam: The Theme of Forgiveness Jennifer: Next January, we’re going to Vietnam with the theme of forgiveness. Everyone says you go to Vietnam and feel forgiveness in its people – part of it is their Buddhist practices, part of it is their history. We’ll read a book by Jack Kornfield on mindfulness and have a mindfulness facilitator with us. Slovenia: Discovering Resilience I did a trip to Slovenia, formerly part of Yugoslavia under communism. I felt such a sense of resilience in the topography that had been war-torn and in its people. There’s a purity, so resilience was our focus. The Camino de Santiago: Finding Answers Through Walking The Camino is an old pilgrimage that people have been doing for centuries throughout Spain. Most people come with a question or in transition, listening for an answer. The Camino gives you what you need – whether walking one week or up to five weeks for the whole thing. We do about two weeks worth in three segments over three years. We transport luggage and you listen for your yes and no, where you want to go, how fast, and with whom. You find guidance, sometimes surprising answers. The Urgency of Travel: Why Now Matters Traveling While You Can Jennifer: A lot of women say they want to go now while they feel they’re still up to it. Sometimes you feel like you better go now because we don’t know how these countries will change – many are being westernized so quickly. Experiencing Authentic Cultures That feeling in Kenya – it’s time to go now. Vietnam is becoming more popular. Different places are hot for a while, then it’s not the same. There’s a lot of change happening, so now is the time to experience our world and be in cultures where we openly listen to one another. Real-Life Transformations: Success Stories from the Road A Woman’s Journey to Self-Worth Jennifer: There was a woman in her 40s on our Camino last year who wasn’t in a good marriage. He wanted out, she kept holding tight. She came and had incredible sisterhood with women spanning decades and recognized, “I’m worth more than how I’m being treated by my husband.” She walked into an inn one night, locked eyes with someone there, and now they’re in a sweet relationship. She told me, “Jen, no matter where this relationship goes, I now know what I’m worth.” That was the transformation. The Power of Sisterhood Support Gloria: I relate to that. I was at a mastermind with all women who knew what I was going through in my marriage. One day they asked, “Gloria, why are you wearing your wedding ring?” I said because I’m still married, but they said I didn’t have to wear it. I took it off that weekend and haven’t put it back on. Finding Honest Heart Journeys: How to Connect Website and Social Media Gloria: If someone wants to learn more about what you’re doing and take one of these trips, where can they go? Jennifer: Go to our website: www.honestheartjourneys.com. We’re also on Instagram and Facebook. I need to get better about LinkedIn, but all information is there. I always welcome calls to field specific questions. Upcoming Online Community Next month we’re launching an online community through the website to keep people connected between trips. The Bigger Mission: Feminine Wisdom for World Healing Living Love Starts Within Jennifer: I’d go back to the call right now in our world to live love, recognizing it starts with our relationship with ourselves – really knowing ourselves and being aware. Our relationship with our divine, whatever that infinite being is – getting those right so we can go out in community and bring our strongest. The Need for Feminine Qualities The feminine wisdom, grace, strength, intuition, collaboration – all of those things are so needed right now. We can help each other get there. It’s not just about me as a woman or you as a woman or us as sisters – it’s about the entire world feeling the grace that’s going to heal us and bring us together. Conclusion: Building Connections for a Better World Gloria: Any way you can find to build connections with other women is so valuable. We can lift each other up. I have a group called the Soulful Women’s Network with a Facebook group designed to uplift each other. The Importance of Diverse Perspectives It’s good to be with like-minded people, but also with non-like-minded people so you can learn from them and they can learn from you. We need to be having conversations where we want to understand where each other is coming from. Mothering Our World Jennifer: We may not all be mothers, but we kind of need to mother our world as sisters. Like in “The Red Tent” by Anita Diamant – that sense of women living in community, having sacred time together, passing down wisdom. Gloria: It starts with mothering yourself. A good way to mother yourself is to give yourself the gift of travel and the connections that stay on from that travel. Thank you for watching and listening today. Make sure you’re subscribed so you won’t miss new episodes – they come out on YouTube on Fridays and on podcast platforms on Tuesdays. Until next time, go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.  

As midlife women entrepreneurs, we sometimes find ourselves staring at a blank page, desperately searching for inspiration. In this candid episode, I open up about my own struggle with creative block and share how I turned a moment of resistance into an opportunity for authentic connection. Show Notes | Transcript “Sometimes we’re going to get stuck. It happens to everyone, and especially to entrepreneurs when you… just don’t want to do something… for a variety of reasons.” – Gloria Grace Rand Join me as I explore the importance of self-care, the power of flexibility, and the unexpected wisdom that can emerge when we embrace our imperfections. In this episode, you’ll discover: How to overcome creative blocks and get unstuck in your business The true meaning of self-care beyond massages and wine My personal journey of releasing 50 pounds and the mindset shifts that made it possible The surprising impact of sugar on your creativity and business focus How light language can help release energetic blocks and enhance intuition Key insights include: Why giving yourself grace is crucial for long-term success The importance of reading food labels and understanding hidden sugars How eating well impacts your mental clarity and business performance The power of committing to your goals publicly Why experimenting with different approaches is key to finding what works for you I also share a powerful light language transmission designed to help you release energetic blocks and enhance your intuition. Whether you’re struggling with creative blocks, seeking to improve your health, or simply looking for a dose of entrepreneurial realness, this episode offers compassionate guidance and practical strategies to help you navigate the ups and downs of business and life. Tune in to discover how embracing imperfection and prioritizing self-care can lead to unexpected breakthroughs in your entrepreneurial journey. Remember, it’s okay to change course when something isn’t working – flexibility might just be the key to your next big idea! Ready to experience the transformative power of light language? See the resources section in the show notes to book a personalized session and address your unique business challenges. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Schedule your private light language session at bit.ly/LLEpodcast30 Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. Have you ever been stuck for an idea and you had to get something done? Whether it was, let’s say, writing a blog post or social media post or recording a podcast episode? Well, that’s me today. That’s what we’re going to be talking about today because I, I had an idea. I had an idea, but I just didn’t want to talk about it. So we’re going to talk about something else. But before I get to that, I’m just going to leave you guessing. I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. Hopefully you’re still going to tune in after that weird intro. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are, lead boldly, and shine their light in the world. And I had every intention about talking about systems today, but I just am not feeling it. And I really wanted to get an episode recorded because this is my week to do it. So I’m recording this when I should have really recorded this about a couple of days ago, but that didn’t happen. And that’s why I decided to just go ahead. Even though I am feeling a bit stuck and not happy with my topic, even though I know it’s a good topic and I’ll get back to it, we will talk about systems. I can give you an excuse. One of the excuses is that my back has been bothering me and it started yesterday and I went to. Went for a lovely massage yesterday, which did help, but it’s still wonky. And also just the idea of systems, even though I know that they’re necessary and I know they’re important for business, I just don’t want to talk about them today. And in fact, if you’re watching this on YouTube, which I hope you are, you, you probably may even notice that I’m not even dressed as fancy as I normally am. I didn’t even put on a whole bunch of makeup. I’ve just got a little bit of lipstick on because I just want to be real today and, and talk about the fact that, yeah, sometimes we’re going to get stuck. It happens to everyone, and especially to entrepreneurs when you. You’re going through and you just don’t want to do something and, and it can be for a variety of reasons. Maybe it is because your health isn’t up to par. Maybe it’s because something has happened in your life to shake you up a little bit and we’ve We’ve talked about that in the past, so I’m not going to dwell on that part of it too much because there, there are a few things that you can do when you are stuck. Number one is to just get started, just decide to do something and just say, you know what? I know I really don’t want to do this, but I’m going to go ahead and do it and you can change topics. So, so what I did before I got online to record today’s episode was I did some, some research. I was trying to find, you know, what are some current trends, what are some ideas, what could I talk about? Especially because I, I’m, I sort of tweaked the title of this podcast now to be Live Love, Engage, Soulful Success Secrets for Midlife Women. Because that really has been the focus of the podcast all year long and, and for sure. And so I decided to make it official. So it does show up that way on itunes or Apple podcasts. Sorry, I’m showing, showing my age. I’ve been doing this podcast for six years now, going into, at the end of the, this year of recording in 2025, we’ll be starting our seventh season. And it used to be itunes, but now, of course, it’s Apple podcasts. And it shows up with the new description and the new title on Spotify as well. So it must be elsewhere. Wherever you’re favorite podcast platform is that you listen to it, you’ll. You’ll see that little tweaking because I wanted to use keywords, of course, and I’ve talked about keywords on the podcast in the, in the past, actually, not too long ago, in fact, but they are important. So I’m. My intention is that more people will find this podcast now, especially those who are looking for soulful success secrets. And you, if you happen to be a midlife woman like I am, and, and I am sticking with, okay, I’m a little past midlife because I am over 60, but I intend to live to be at least a hundred. So not that far over the midlife area. Anyway, where was I? I got, I got sidetracked. So if you’re, if you get stuck. So I was doing this topic research and then decided, yeah, I don’t like any of those either, but I’m just going to go ahead. I know that if I get Streamyard, I use Streamyard to record this podcast. If I just get it set up and I, and I start putting together my little notes like I always do, something will come to me. And so I Started off by talking about what happens when you do get stuck. And I think that, number one is, is the best way to go about it is to just decide, you know, what this has to get done. I’m just going to put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard or, or something and just, just get started. And what’s the expression? You know, it’s. It’s a woman’s prerogative to change her mind. So you can change your mind, you can change the topic. You don’t have to stay married to it unless you are someone who is working at a job and you have to for. But if you are an entrepreneur, like I presume many of you are, then you have a little bit more flexibility. So I wanted to tell you that. And the other thing is that you can also, if you have the opportunity to say, I don’t feel like doing this today, and if you can actually put it off for a day or put it off for maybe a couple of hours, then do that. Give yourself the grace to take a break, to put it aside. If it’s something that’s not totally on deadline for you, go for a walk, do something fun, put on some music and see if the creative juices will flow later, because most likely they will. But we have to give ourselves that time. And it’s really important. You only get, well, you only get one life in this particular body, okay, in this incarnation. And whether you believe in reincarnation or not, whoever you are right now, as you are listening to this or watching it, that’s who you are in this lifetime. And so make the most of it and be kind to yourself. I saw a friend posted on Facebook today about. She talked about how what self care is and that it’s not just, you know, a glass of wine and a massage, although that is very important. Well, the massage part, I don’t drink alcohol anymore and it seems like there’s been some. Now there’s ideas about that maybe it’s not quite as healthy as, you know, it was once purported, but then again, there are so many things out there that it gets confusing about what the heck is healthy for us and what isn’t. Which also leads me to part of what I also wanted to talk about today. But anyway, she talked about how that it’s, it’s self care is more than that. And I think I’ve mentioned this on the podcast as well, and that it’s really, it’s about taking care of you. And, and so yes, like I said, massages could be part of that. But it’s also about getting plenty of sleep, getting good exercise or regular exercise of whatever that is. I mean, for me, I go for a walk every day at least once. Sometimes I’ll do twice. I may go out. I go out first thing in the morning, sometimes before the sun is even up, especially because I live in Florida. So it’s July and it’s hot and humid now. So the earlier I can go out, the better because there’s no way that I would go out in the middle of the afternoon. I would bake, almost, almost literally because it’s, let’s see, what’s the temperature right now? The temperature is 90 to 93 degrees Fahrenheit right now. And so if you are living in somewhere where it’s Celsius, you’re gonna have to figure that out. I think it’s 30 something, maybe 35. I don’t know. It’s hot. So I’m not going to be outside going for a walk right now. But it is about self care is about, like I said, getting plenty of sleep, getting plenty of rest. It’s about, you know, getting regular exercise. It’s about eating healthy foods for you. And we’re going to come back to that in a minute. I’m going to put a, put a little pin in it. As the, as the expression goes, it’s about taking care of yourself spiritually and mentally. So it is taking like a mental health break once in a while. It is giving yourself time to, you know, to meditate or to journal. Those are, those are practices I’ve talked about on the podcast before, that what I always recommend that my clients do because it’s a way of being able to tune in and to really start cultivating your intuition, which is so helpful when you’re in business, to be able to have that inner knowing. So to be able to tune into that. So those are some of the things self care is about. So I mentioned I put a pin in the healthy eating for you. And that was actually really one of the main things I wanted to talk about today. If you are a subscriber to the podcast on YouTube and you’ve been, if you’re a longtime subscriber, let’s say if you’ve been watching me for over the last year, and particularly since last October, I hope you have noticed that my face has gotten narrower. It used to be like, really, I’m, for those of you listening, I’m like puffing out my cheeks because I was nearly 50 pounds heavier back in October. And at that time I was engaged in a time where I was. Had put on weight again for about probably the fifth time in the last 10 years because. Well, let me, let me set some context here first. So number one, I have had a not very good relationship with food my entire life. I am. And I can tell you that I still remember writing in my diary when I was like 9 years old or something that I weighed 100 pounds. And considering I was pretty short, I think that was pretty heavy. I mean I wasn’t super heavy, I don’t think, but still not great. I do remember that when I was in junior high I had gotten down to like a size 9 and I was so excited. But by the time I graduated high school and started college, I think I put on more than the freshman 10. It was the freshman 20. And then throughout my life I was always. You’ve probably heard of the yo yo dieting syndrome of putting on weight, taking it off, trying every diet under the sun, trying different things like hypnosis and all sorts of different ways to be able to do it and nothing would stick for very long. Now I did get at one point, and this was in the early 2000s, I got to the highest weight I’d ever reached, which was 195. And the only reason I found that out is because my husband’s work had enabled us or somehow had recommended that we could join the ymca. And so for those of you who don’t live in the States, it’s a, it’s a, it’s an organization where they will have a lot of like fitness classes and, and things like that. So, and in fact, when I was a kid I used to go to the local Y, hell had day camp. And so I would go to day camp in the summertime. So I was very familiar with the ymca. And so I went in and, and decided that at the time the, the Biggest Loser was, was big on tv. And so I, I was already starting to kind of be aware of that. And then I went ahead and stepped on the scale, had this, this person there who was going to weigh me in and then have me get trained to learn on all these different fitness machines. And when I saw that, I was like, holy crap. Because I had been in denial about how much weight I had gained. So since that, I’ve never gotten back up to that weight. So that, that’s one good thing. So even though, but I’ve come about £20 close to it and that’s about where I was last year as well. So like I said, I’ve been I would in 2015, I remember and this was short. I guess it was around when my sister was diagnosed with cancer. I was on a program then and lost a ton of weight. And I’m gonna, I’m saying lost then because I’m going to tell you something different now that I’ve re reframed it. So I got. Was looking really, really great. And then the following year my sister passed away and I gave myself permission to eat my grief. And so I put all of that weight that I had lost back on again. And so that’s what I’ve been doing then is like putting on £40 or taking off £40 or putting on 50 and taking off 50. And last year again I had, you know, I thought I was doing well because the year before I had, I went to see a hypnotist and that because I was desperate. It’s like I’ve got to do something and, and it worked for a while. We were able to kind of tap into something that I thought I had released. Except that when I started then at Christmas time indulging a little bit and said oh, I could have a little bit of sugar now I could have a little cookies. You know, it’s just Christmas. What could go wrong? And before you know it all last year, up until the fall, I, or at least through the beginning, probably this first six months of the year, I, I put on the weight and yet I was also kind of watching it. And then I would try to go back and try to eat healthier and, and then it would come back down a little bit, but then it would go up and then it would come down and go up until finally a wonderful gentleman who I met through LinkedIn told me that he had just released a bunch of weight and he did it through a book which I should have brought. I have it in the other room. I should have put it on here. Maybe I’ll paste it on there. It’s a book called Post Diabetes or Post Diabetic. I’ll double check it. And it’s a program, it sort of follows a wild fit. But it’s. He said this was what he followed and he was able to do this. And, and so I bought the book and started reading it. And what I loved about it was it not only it, it was like a nine week program to. That not only helped you see what to eat, but it also explained some of the, the mindset. It focused in a lot on mindset and it also focused in on the fact that here in the United States the food manufacturers really do a good job at putting sugar in just about everything and they disguise it in a myriad of different ways. But it’s all designed to be able to get us to eat more and to eat more and to eat more. I mean there’s, you’ll find sugar in spaghetti sauce and in a bottle, you know, in a jar of spaghetti sauce. And, and I know my mother used to make homemade spaghetti sauce and, and she would say you put a little bit, you know, like a pinch of sugar in there because it does need a pinch, but it’s like in, in jar, some of these jar spaghetti sauces it would be like maybe the second ingredient or the second or second or third ingredient. And, and for those of you who may not be aware of this, whatever the, the first ingredient is in, when you’re reading on a label, on a food label that that food or whatever it is, that processed food maybe has, that’s the most ingredient is in that. And then it goes down the scale. But essentially the plan was to eat a lot of natural food, you know, good quality protein, you know, even like, you know, if you, if you wanted to be vegetarian you could do that, but you don’t have to, but to eat good, you know, organic or grass fed beef and eggs, you know, and you know, pasture raised eggs or things like that. And, and vegetables, lots of vegetables and a little bit of fruit, no dairy. I still have to go back in. And he had the, also the thing with the book was that also came with an online course and which featured a lot of videos by the author of the book and which were very entertaining and informative also. And, and the way the book was, it was like don’t read ahead. You, you just got to focus one week at a time. So I was very disciplined and not reading ahead and just took it one week at a time. And, and the great thing was the first two weeks it was again he was teaching more about mindset. So he’s like, just keep eating what you normally eat. Don’t, don’t think about, this isn’t about getting rid of anything. Which I really appreciate it because so often if you’re someone who is, you know, who wants to be able to lose weight, then you, if you, you go on a diet which, you know, die, die first three letters of that word is that you are, you often feel very deprived because you can’t have this and you can’t have that. And then our psychology, our brain is like, oh, but I really want that. And then you’ll you’ll sabotage yourself. And that’s why so many people won’t even succeed. They’ll, they’ll maybe go a week or two and then they’re already cheating, you know, which again is not great for your mental well being and being able to stick with something. Now I mentioned early on that finding eating healthy foods that are right for you because even though this, this program worked for me, and one thing I’m saying now is that I didn’t, I haven’t lost weight. I’ve released almost 50 pounds because I don’t want to find them again. I’ve been finding those pounds over and over again my whole entire life and I’m sick of finding them. So this time I’ve released them. Where was I, what did I, where was I going with this? Okay. Oh yes. Okay. Just because this worked for me doesn’t mean it’s going to work for you. And, and again, I’ve tried lots of different programs over the years and some have worked for quite a while. And so I, I will include the resource in, in the show notes of what I did. But, but again, I, I don’t want to say that this is going to work for you because it may not. What I will say is that I encourage you to do is to read labels, number one, and especially if you’re in the United States to read food labels because there is so much processed food. If you, if a food has more than like say five ingredients on it odds and then it starts getting into all of these like chemical names that you don’t recognize. With multi, multi syllabic, you know all these different syllables, then chances are you should, you might want to rethink that. You might want to find something else because one of the things that I’ve done over the past since October is I’ve been cooking more and, and I’m, I live by myself so it’s only cooking for one, which I know is not always people find challenging sometimes if you live alone to be able to, to cook. But I just, you know, I’ll cook up several meals at once and I just divide it up and I freeze stuff and then I’ve got leftovers. So like this morning I actually had, I was hungry and I decided to have a leftover. I was going to have this later in the day, but I make this lovely turkey burger with, with ground turkey and it has spinach and dried tomatoes and red pepper in it and then some seasonings and it’s really yummy. And so I decided screw, screw waiting for Later I’m having that for breakfast because I’m hungry, but I’ve been eating a lot. What I recommend to you is to just choose the best quality food you can. And, and you might want to experiment and see what works best for you because maybe, maybe you do want to do like follow a vegan diet or maybe you want to follow vegetarian. I’ve, I’ve done vegetarian in the past and I’ve done a little bit, not totally vegan, but a little bit. And I’ve also done, you know, paleo and all these other things. And I mean, I’m sort of following kind of a moderate paleo plan sort of right now, but it’s what works for me. But, but the other things that I would encourage you to do, even just as an experiment, is to cut out sugar from your diet for at least one week. And if you can do it, do it for two weeks. And I mean again, you’re going to need to read labels because you will be surprised at where you might find sugar. Sucrose, corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup. What are some of the other. There’s, there’s lots of different names. Anything that adds, ends in like O S E is, is usually some type of sugar. So load up on vegetables. That’s the other thing that I do is every morning I start or every, maybe not first thing in the morning, but at least by early afternoon I have a green smoothie and I have lots of vegetables in it. I use a little bit of lemon juice in it and some water and I’ve got this lovely nutribullet blender that I use and it’s so good. I look forward to having that every day. Now. You know, the first, first few times it was like it’s a little green, but, but now I love it. But the key is that when you stop having sugar, this refined sugar that is out there in so many things, and then you start, but, but you’re focused in on eating good foods. You may find that like the first time, especially if you don’t have any fruit at all and that, that’s a good experiment too is to don’t, don’t even have any fruit, like for one week, just have vegetables and protein, you’ll be fine. I, you know, you’re not going to die if you don’t have fruit for one week. And then once you get that refined sugar out of your system, I bet you that you’re going to find. Because I know for me like now when I have a strawberry, fresh strawberry, oh My gosh, it’s so sweet and delicious and yummy, yummy, yummy. And the other thing I want to tell you is to also be aware of how you feel. You might want to journal as you’re going through this week without any sugar and see how your brain works, because again, now, this is for me, because I don’t know how this is with you, but when I go off sugar for a long time and then when I go back on it, it’s seriously like, it acts like a drug for me. And also wheat here in the United States, the wheat, not crazy about. It’s also like sugar for me as well. And I wind up feeling like I’ve got like a sugar hangover because I, I, But I don’t mean well, that’s what I call it. But it’s like I feel, I wind up feeling depressed. I don’t have as much energy, I don’t want to do stuff. And I. And then that is not good for my business. And we’ll come back to the business part because when I have been eating well, I feel a lot better and, and my head is clearer and I’m able to come up with ideas. So even for today, the fact that, you know, I didn’t. I was supposed to do one topic, and I decided to pivot and do something else today. It’s. It’s okay because the. Or, well, not that it’s okay. It’s. I had the idea because I’m eating healthy and, and I did indulge a little bit last week. Not, not, not terribly, but I was at a friend’s house and they were celebrating a birthday and it was like, okay, so I had a little bit of cake. I tried to eat the icing, but it was, it was too sweet. I couldn’t eat it. So I just ate the cake part, which is sweet enough, but it was enough to kind of get me a little off kilter. And so, yeah, that’s where I want to go with that today. I hope this has been helpful for you. I really, I really hope it has been. And I will say the other thing that has helped me consistently in I, I think also in being able to stick with this thing. Now, I will say, actually, before I get there, one of the things I did want to notice and I should, I should have looked this up, but I think I’ve essentially released most of this weight. I’ve had it off for a couple of months now. And I was talking with yesterday, I think I mentioned it at the beginning that I got A massage. And the woman there said that it takes about six months for you to be at like, you’re like a steady weight, to be maintaining a steady weight, for it to also then sort to release the emotional weight that that might be, you might have been carrying as well. So I’m looking forward to that because I do feel that that has also been my Achilles heel, is that I haven’t been able to go more than a couple of months. But I am committing myself to you right now. And so hold me accountable that you keep watching, especially for those of you watching on YouTube and you see that I don’t intend to put this weight back on again. Like I said, I have released it and I still have a few more I would like to release, but I’m not in any hurry to do it. Frankly. If I just maintain the. This weight for the next several months, I’m going to be very happy because my son is getting married in the fall and I’m going to look darn good at that wedding. So I’m very happy. Yeah, you know, after the holidays, then maybe I’ll. I’ll work on getting another 10, 10 or 15 off by then. But I’m. I’m in. I know I’m in fairly healthy state right now and, and I feel good. And I. And I, I feel I look good. So. And I’ve had people compliment me actually, so, so that feels good. So what I was going to say, though, is the other thing that has helped me in being able to stick with this this time around is, is. And it’s something that I’ve been doing for several years, but I think this time it’s been in combination with everything. And really for me, this book was a game changer because I’ve. I learned so much. So check it out if it’s, you know, see if it’s right for you, you know, but what I’ve learned through that and then having the practice of channeling light language has really helped me to be able to release some of the other energetic blocks that have in the past kept me from keeping that weight off for a long time. So what I thought I would do today is share some light language with you and my intention for this and, and I’ll go over what this is in a minute. But what I’m going to be doing is I’m going to be speaking and, or singing. I’m not sure, but I’m setting the intention that the message that you receive today will be, will help you in whatever way it’s Going to be for your soul’s highest good in whatever way that is. Whether it’s releasing some sort of energetic block or, or enhancing your intuition or just being a stress reliever. That’s what I’m, that’s what I’m setting the intention for. Now, if this is your first time tuning in and you’re like, what the heck is light language? What are you talking about? Okay, let me, let me give the short version and I would encourage you to find there’s old podcast episodes about this. Maybe I should put that in my pod, my notes too, as a refresher. Maybe I will. Anyway, it’s a form of, it’s a multi dimensional communication and, and, and it’s something that, as I said, I mentioned that I, I will speak it, I will sing it. And it’s something that the, your logic part of your brain will try to translate it. And you have the right side of your brain may be able to. I have worked with a client who was able to translate it, but it doesn’t matter. All you need to do is listen with an open heart because that’s what it’s designed to do. It is designed to just bypass that logical side of your brain and just speak to your heart and your soul and work on it. It’s an energetically because it is, it’s sound vibration. And so that does affect the body. There have been studies that have shown, you know, music therapy, for instance, does, does help. And, and it is, it’s this, it’s a sound vibration. So, so that’s all you need to do. And the second, second point I will make is that if you are listening to this podcast right now and you’re listening to it while you’re driving your car, then I would highly recommend you pause this and come back to it later because it is, it can be very relaxing. And so I don’t want you to get into, to get into trouble while you’re driving, you know, running. What is it says don’t, don’t be operating heavy machinery while you’re listening to this. So, so pause it and come back. You can. I’m going to presume that you’re back now that you paused it, now you’re back. Welcome back. So what I would invite you to do now is to get comfortable, close your eyes if you wish and set an intention for yourself that the message that you’re going to receive will be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. And that’s what I’m setting for you as well. And for me too. Yeah. Just wanted to give you a little, a little taste of that and if you would like to ever have. You know, I do sessions with clients and I do them via Zoom. And when I work with, work with someone who is coming to me for a light language session, we’re able to, you know, handle something specific. You know, if you come with a specific challenge, then that’s what I will set the intention to, to help address. So I will have a link for that in the show notes and it’s in, in, in YouTube as well. And as I also have a banner going by right now, so there’s. It’s a lovely bitly link that you can, you can use to schedule a session with me. And I invite you to do that because it’s a, it’s a really wonderful modality. It’s been so, so helpful for me. All right, so I think that’s going to do it for today. It’s amazing. You know, even though I didn’t have. I didn’t know what I was going to talk about today, I wasn’t even sure I was going to record a podcast today. I was like, oh, I know I gotta do it, but I don’t want to talk about systems. Maybe next time. But until then, I hope you are subscribed to the podcast because next week I have a fabulous conversation with the lovely Jennifer Dale. She is the founder of Honest Heart Journeys, a transformative travel community for women over 50. She’s a blogger, a speaker, and the host of her own podcast, which I was privileged to be a guest on, called the Honest Heart Podcast. I’m. I’m looking ahead at Heart and I keep wanting to say honest Heart. It’s like. No, it’s honest that H is silent English language. It’s so wonderful, isn’t it? Anyway, she is passionate about sisterhood, intergenerational understanding, and soulful adventures that foster personal growth, deep connections, and the courage to embrace new experiences at any stage of life. And I tell you, she talked about some great stuff. And really my intention one of these days is to go on one of the tourists that she, she puts together because they just sound fabulous. They really, really do. So make sure that you’re subscribed and so you’ll be able to do that. Seeing the. My lovely Internet connection is a little wonky at the moment. So let me pause for a second. Maybe I’ll edit it this out. Okay. Whatever it is what it is. Anyway, thank you for watching. Thank you for listening. I look forward to being with you again soon. And until then, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

High performance living isn’t just about achieving goals. It’s about thriving through life’s toughest challenges. Joining me to share his formula for beating burnout is Christian Ray Flores, an entrepreneur, international recording artist, philanthropist, and high-performance coach who has lived an extraordinary life spanning multiple continents and cultures. Show Notes | Transcript “Everybody knows, okay, problems never go away. I don’t care how healthy you are, how pretty you are, how rich you are, you will always have problems. It’s just part of the human experience… if you’re not going to escape it, at least beat it.” – Christian Ray Flores Christian shares his journey from child refugee to pop star and philanthropist, revealing how these experiences shaped his understanding of resilience and antifragility. We explore the concept of post-traumatic growth and how it can be applied to both personal and professional life. In this episode, you’ll discover: How to cultivate antifragility and grow stronger through life’s challenges The power of curiosity in developing resilience and adaptability Why incorporating deep learning into daily life is crucial for entrepreneurial success How to leverage different cultural perspectives to strengthen your life and business Key insights include: The importance of balancing consistency with exploration in your daily routine Why rest and recovery are essential components of high performance How faith and spirituality can provide a framework for personal growth The value of aiming higher in life and business, despite the challenges Christian also shares his practical 80/20 formula for incorporating new learning and growth into your daily life, explaining how this approach can lead to transformational results in just 30 days. Whether you’re an entrepreneur looking to build resilience in your business or simply seeking ways to thrive in an ever-changing world, this conversation offers valuable insights and actionable strategies. Tune in to discover how you can develop unshakable grit and turn life’s challenges into opportunities for growth! Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Christian Free Newsletter: christianrayflores.com Exponential Scorecard Assessment: xponential.life Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. Life always has a way of throwing us curveballs. Have you noticed that? Well, what if you could not only bounce back, but actually grow stronger through these challenges? Well, today’s guest is going to explain how we can build unshakable grit and antifragility in our life and businesses, even when the world seems to be changing faster than we can keep up. But before I get to him, so. So you have a hint already. It’s, it’s, it’s a gentleman. I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, founder of align to Shine Academy. And I, I love empowering women over 50 to step into their highest potential with clarity and confidence. And in just a moment, I am going to bring on Christian Ray Flores. And I, I’m trusting that is how you pronounce his last name. I just realized I didn’t ask him, but I’m, I’m guessing, I’m pretty sure it is, but. He is an entrepreneur, international recording artist, philanthropist, and high performance coach who empowers business and non profit leaders to reach and stay at the top of their game. And this gentleman has led an extraordinary life, going from a child refugee in Chile to entertaining millions as a pop star in Europe and leading philanthropic projects around the world. And that’s just for starters. I mean, I could go on and on, but I can’t wait to have you meet him. So I am going to, without further ado, bring him onto our stage and welcome you, Christian, to Engage. Hello. Thank you, Grace. Thanks for having me. Oh, well, I am, yeah, I’m just, you know, when, and I don’t know even remember how we connected, probably your PR person or something, but it was like, you know, when I’m reading up on you, I’m going, oh my gosh, you’ve had this incredible, incredible life. So we’re talking today about, you know, really about like resilience and, and you know, and having that fortitude to be able to not only bounce back but also grow. So what, you know, throughout all of your journey that you’ve had, what were some of the maybe key moments that taught you the most about resilience that, you know, those watching and listening today can apply in their own lives. Thanks for asking. I, I’ve had a very sort of early uncertainty as a child. You know, like when you’re a refugee at age 5, you know, you’re definitely in a very select group of people and, and then that kept sort of growing and changing. I basically Ended up moving to four countries by age seven. And, you know, but before I was 21, I had experienced a mil. A military coup in Chile, Latin America, a civil war in Africa, which was in Mozambique, where I lived and grew up from between 7 and 14 and the collapse of the Soviet Union, in Moscow, in Eastern Europe. So I mean, who does that, right? Who, who, who has that kind of experience on three different continents before you’re even 20? So that’s, that was sort of just a slice of, of that. And then of course, throw in some poverty, economic instability, even family drama, my parents got divorced. And so you have yourself a nice cocktail of challenges. Right. And I don’t think there’s like these sort of aha moments that are like, from one moment to another, you become enlightened. It’s really more of a process, I think, and I think that’s actually true of most people. It’s really more of an evolution, a process that has almost like these quantum leaps every once in a while. And I think for me, that was. That was sort of the. Between 0 and 21, 25, I was sort of exposed to enough stress and enough sort of stressors, so to say that either I become sort of this perpetual victim or I develop some anti fragility so that I can not only, not only survive, but thrive in life. Now you mentioned anti fragility right there. And I had mentioned that in the bio, and I haven’t actually come across that particular word before, so I wonder if you could define that a little bit. Just, you know, maybe it’s just, just my, my ignorance, but I’d love to know what you mean by that and how can we really cultivate that? Yeah, but, you know, we talk about fortitude quite a bit or resilience quite a bit. That’s sort of the, the main thing. Right. Antifragility was actually coined as a term by this guy, Nassim Taleb, who is a brilliant guy, He’s a financier and entrepreneur, that kind of thing. There’s actually a term in psychology that mirrors that, I think fairly closely. And the psychology term is post traumatic growth. And it’s basically, you know, everybody knows ptsd. Very few people know that there’s sort of this other side of trauma called post traumatic growth. And it’s really fascinating because most of our sort of psychology, the discipline of psychology, focused very heavily on PTSD and on trauma. And then with maybe the last 20 years or so. So it’s very recent, relatively speaking, the positive psychology movement, unearthed this other thing, right? This other capability that we have, which is post traumatic growth, but it’s basically the ability to not only withstand obstacles and problems and stressors, either internal or external, but actually grow not in spite of them, but because of them. And to me that’s one of the most amazing things that to, to dig into and to develop as a skill set, a human being. Because everybody knows, okay, problems never go away. I don’t care how healthy you are, how pretty you are, how rich you are, you will always have problems. It’s just that it’s just part of the human experience. So if that’s part of the human experience and you can’t escape it, developing the ability to process obstacles and trauma and stressors seems to be like, okay, well you, if you’re not going to beat it, if you’re not going to escape it, at least beat it. Right? So that’s basically the, the essence of it. Yeah. And I have heard of the term post traumatic growth before and, and I feel like that’s definitely something that I’ve experienced in my own life because I, I mean certainly not same kind of childhood as yours, but I have, you know, I think everybody has their own, Everybody does stuff. Yeah, of course, of course, course that, that goes. But it is that you know, ability to, to then learn from it. Have you, have you found maybe in, in working with, with clients yourself? Is there, how should I phrase this? Is there a particular quality maybe that you see in someone that, where they, maybe they, they aren’t growing yet, but they do have that potential to grow. So. Because I think, I mean, I think that quality is curiosity. That’s the, that’s the quality. It’s the curiosity. That’s all it is. Right. Like if you are at the very least open that your, you can interpret and navigate life different, differently from where what you have in the past. That’s the quality. It’s curiosity. Okay. You know, it’s. Everything seems unsurmountable or hard to imagine for yourself when you’re on this side of, of the question of, of the quest. Right. So yeah, be curious, ask questions, get guidance, read books, get coaching. Everybody can learn it. Everybody should learn it. As a matter of fact, I would say, yeah. Because it. Otherwise you’re just stuck in that cycle of being wallowing in, in it and not getting anywhere. Yeah, that makes sense. Most men live a life of quiet desperation, the famous quote says. Right. And it’s just true. Most men and women, I would say, live a life of quiet desperation. Do you want to stay there? That’s the question. Right. And. Okay, are you willing to do the work to not stay there? Yeah, absolutely. So this leads me to my, My next question is how has. Because I know a faith is a big part of your journey as well. So how has that made a difference in maybe supporting you through some of the challenges you’ve gone through? Well, to me, basically, I. I was, I grew up in a very faithless environment. Both my parents were Marxists, everybody knew were atheists, you know, and everybody, like every single person. I recently realized I haven’t, I didn’t meet anyone, like, didn’t have a relationship, didn’t know anyone personally who believed in a divine power until I was like in my early 20s, late teens maybe, you know, so I was. Faith came into my life relatively late for sort of the American experience. The American experience. Most people are exposed to some sort of faith, you know, at the very least, you know, people who believe. So for me, this was late. And basically the way it helped me is that it gave me a, you know, a framework that is outside of myself that basically told me that I am, that I have unsurpassed worth, that I am loved, that there’s a God who loves me and cares about me personally, and that I was relieved to find out that not all in life is about me, that I’m not the center of the universe. And therefore the solutions and the answers to the big questions in life don’t really, really shouldn’t reside in me in the first place. I can find them elsewhere and I can strive and grow. And then the other thing, I think that was important to me that I understood that there was a. That I was created, you know, to be aligned with a divine presence, to be aligned with God, and that he wants me to grow into it. Right. I was created, but I, but I chose, I choose something different all the time. And, and I can strive and expand, but that’s sort of my. It is my natural state to be a spiritual human being. And I think that’s a huge deal that was missing in my life. I did have a lot of resilience, antifragility by then already, but it almost like it really expanded me in ways that I. That antifragility alone can’t really give you. So, I mean, there’s a reason why, you know, the, the most thorough research in human development, the Harvard Research Project, that was like 80 plus years, spanning several generations, completely secular study shows that a transcendent practice is essential for human happiness and flourishing. Essential people are healthier, wealthier, live longer who have a spiritual practice. So this, and this is completely not a, like a religious study. So this is just objectively true. And I find that to be like a core pillar thing for, for people to discover, to, to nurture. Right, Yeah, I agree with that 100%. And I know that for me, I, I grew up in a semi religious family. I mean, we went to church every week. But I, I wouldn’t necessarily call us really devout Catholics, so. But you were exposed to it, right? I was exposed to it, yes. You know, but I, you know, but my mother loved to make, you know, comments in the back of the church, you know, complaining about the priest. So, so I like to call myself sort of that cafeteria Catholic where we kind of take, resonate with and leave the rest. So it was really my journey later in life where I started to start questioning some of these things that I grew up learning and going, do I really, do I really, really believe that. I do believe in God. I always felt close to God, especially out in nature, but I wasn’t necessarily. The dogma didn’t really necessarily stick with me or prove to be relevant. I guess I could say. Now you mentioned spiritual practices and I’d love to dive in to that because I am curious to see what other, other people do. And I know again, anyone who’s watched my show, you know, or listened to me for years now, I always preached sort of the same practices that have helped me and have helped some of my clients. So I’m curious to know what, what, what does your spiritual practice look like and. Yeah, yeah, let me just stop it right there. Well, yeah, well, we can talk about that for hours. But I’m a Christian. And of course there’s like, that’s not even saying much because there’s like a thousand types of that, of people who identify as Christian. But I would say for me, for the purposes of what we’re talking about, right, Thriving life, all of that, the key sort of things are the first hour of the day, I pray, I read scripture, a contemplate. There’s all kinds of ways to pray and contemplate. Obviously there’s all kinds of ways to read scripture, obviously. So that’s a key thing for me, spiritually speaking, being in a spiritual community. That’s a practice, I think, having a Sabbath rhythm. So I Sabbath every week, a full day of delight and rest. And you know, it’s just, it’s one of the most important parts of my life. I go to church every Sunday and community in general, sort of. I’m Immersed in that. So being deeply, deeply connected relationally with people who are. Who I can help and some other people that. Who can help me, who are ahead of me both in age and wisdom and spirituality. So all of that together, I think it’s, you know, that’s the broad strokes when it comes to spiritual practices. Yeah. And I think you raised an important point about the importance of community, too, that you’re not having to necessarily even go this alone, but to be able to share an experience with other people, I think is so beneficial in all parts of your life. Yeah, yeah, I think it’s essential. I mean, even in my coaching, I have cohorts for that particular reason. It’s because one on one is great. I just think there’s. There’s dimensions there that are impossible to get to unless you’re with people who are journeying with you. Oh, yeah. Because you can. Because everybody comes from a different perspective, and you can always learn from one another. Yeah. So it’s. Yeah, I love doing that as well. You know, you mentioned early at the beginning about, you know, being, you know, especially at such a young age, we’re, like, in. Immersed in all of these different cultures, so how can we leverage different perspectives and, you know, to be able to strengthen either, you know, our lives and our businesses, Especially as we’re recording this, it’s just. It’s like crazy times. I don’t know what the rest of the year will look like, but right now it just seems like the world is going a little blah, so. But then again, the world always tends to look like that, too, so. Yeah, you read some news newspapers from, like, a hundred years ago, and the sky was falling back then as well. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It’s just. Right. It’s cyclical, I guess. Right? That’s true. That’s very true. Yeah. So. Yeah. So. So what do you think about, you know, being in different cultures? How has that helped you and how does that. How can that help other entrepreneurs out there? Well, one thing I learned, and this is literally luck, Right. Luck, providence, whatever you want to call it, is that when you move to four countries, literally on three different continents by age seven, you are forced into a state of being, basically. Right. So I had no choice in the matter. And the state of being is utter confusion and understanding that you have to learn very, very quickly if you want to fit in, if you want to sort of survive, even on an emotional level, obviously. And one of the stories that my dad tells me is. And I just. My dad is in Chile. He lives in Chile. My mom is Russian, my dad’s Chilean. I just spent two weeks with my dad and just all kinds of like a feast of stories and catching up and all of that. And he basically tells me the story like literally last week where I arrive in Mozambique. It’s an African country. This is after going from Chile, Spanish to Germany, German, Russia, Russian. Like everything’s different. Not only the languages, people are very different. And then you were in Africa. It’s a completely different world, right? It’s not like the neighboring state or anything like that. So I’m sitting there with, with him. He’s. He’s going, he’s taking us to have dinner with friends, his friends. And I said, hey dad, can I like stay in the car? You can go have dinner. And he said, why, what is wrong? He goes, and I said, I feel embarrassed. I don’t speak the language that you’re speaking. I guess I knew Spanish, but then I’d forgotten it when I was in Germany and Russia. By the time I was sort of really rusty on that and I was just paralyzed and confused. And he tells me I was sort of quiet for like a year, right? It’s almost like this, the trauma, the trauma of change. Change. Change got me super quiet. And what it did, in hindsight, it mobilized me. It. I sort of reoriented myself into sort of immersive learning. That’s probably the best way I can describe it, right? And I’m like, okay, I need to fit in. I need to learn fast. So the reason I tell you this story is that children in general tend to be very, very good at that, right? They are sponges. We say that about children and then they’re very creative. They play games. That’s part of the learning process, is playing games. So when people say, for example, you say to a grown up, are you a creative type? No, I’m not a creative type. I’m more of a math person. They completely are. They’re off, right? Why? Because if you go to first grade and you say to a bunch of kids, hey, do you paint? Are you an artist? Everybody will say, yes, of course. We drive, we play, we draw pictures, we experiment with things. You do the exact same question, let’s say in high school and like two thirds of the class doesn’t, they don’t raise their hand. Why? We trained creativity learning, these immersive learning, experiential learning from kids early on, and we continue suffering from that deficiency as grown ups. The reason I tell you this story is to tell you this other story. The Complexities of life, especially if you live in the US and in the west, are such that you basically are rinse and repeat every single day. You’re just barely catching up with life. Maybe you’re even underwater with life, whatever. Finances, complexity, logistics, household, all of those things. A spouse, two and a half kids, a dog, you know, all of that. So you’re barely keeping up and you stop learning. And the key, the cool thing, is that you can recreate the learning experience of a child as a grown up. The whole idea that you stop learning, that you’re not a sponge anymore, it’s a complete myth. Neuroplasticity stays forever. You. And one of the things that I do with people that I coach is I teach them how to incorporate deep learning into literally daily life. And that, and especially if you’re, you know, you’re building a business, you’re an entrepreneur, that’s the hardest thing you can possibly do, seriously. Maybe after marriage, okay, marriage is the hardest thing you can possibly do. That’s true. So, so you know, you’re building a business. And if you build a business, any entrepreneur that is listening to me right now will say, amen to this when I say you go into building a business or a new venture and you know, like, you think like, you know, okay, I know the five things that are essential to this thing, so I feel like I’m going to do well. And then you promptly realize that you need to know 50 things, not five things, right? To build a successful business. So you have to figure out a way how to learn. And so my formula for that is that 80% of what you do should be things that you know well. But you have to stay very consistent. It needs to be safe, consistent. Rinse and repeat, you know, patterns, patterns, patterns, patterns, right? And then 20% of what you do, but I mean, daily should be about exploring something new, learning a new skill, experimenting with this new approach to marketing, let’s say experimenting with messaging, experimenting with how you coach people, changing your website, oh, figuring out how AI feeds into your thing, figuring out, okay, I need some help. I don’t know how to train people, how to train people, how to hire people, et cetera, et cetera. It’s you, you, you think you can know five things. It’s not enough. You need to do 50 things. The only way to get to 50 is to learn continuously. And basically there’s a way, a systematic, step by step way to incorporate that into your day so that this is literally your new life. You are a sponge, a child, an Immersive learner. Yeah. And if you adopt that kind of lifestyle, you will do really well in business, basically. Very cool. And it’s interesting because I started a new thing this year where I should have been doing this for years, but whatever, you know, I’m. Yeah, we all think that. Yeah, I feel the same way. So. So one of I. So I do like, a daily planner that I’m filling out. I mean, I actually have a hard copy. I’m old school instead of doing it online. But one of the things of my habits that I’ve been building is to spend at least 15 minutes a day on doing some sort of coursework. So. Because I. I don’t know, you know, I’m. I’m sure I’m not alone. And a lot of entrepreneurs have, you know, fallen victim to shiny object syndrome. And we sign up for a course, but then we don’t finish that. So I’m determined to actually go back in and start finishing some of these courses that I signed up for. And it really feels good to be able to at least dedicate a few minutes every day. So I love what you were talking about here because I think that is so good to be able to grow, you know, spend a few minutes or. Or spe. Know, a certain percentage of your day in learning a new skill. Because, yeah, we, we even. Even if you’re not an entrepreneur and you happen to be listening to this show, you. You are. You are creative because let’s say you’re a parent, you have to come up with novel ways to get your child to do something. I’ve. I experienced that when. When my kids were little and maybe still do sometimes, now that they’re adults, you still have to figure out a way to get their attention. And so if that’s not creativity, I don’t know what is. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, if you’re. You’re creative, if you are to create a new. A different future than today. Right. If not, if that doesn’t motivate you, I don’t know what will. Yeah. Because none of us are satisfied with the present future, with the present state. We also. We want more. We’re wired for that. Yeah. Right. We’re wired to create. Yeah, absolutely. You know, so. Yeah. Well, and that brings me to my next question, which is, you know, you have, like, reinvented yourself several times. I have, but I know sometimes even, you know, as entrepreneurs, sometimes we can, you know, maybe we feel like we, you know, being called to, like, pivot, but it’s scary. So how. How do you recommend someone overcome that. You know, you can use the same 8020 formula, but as a matter of fact, it is actually like as a full circle statement, the formula for antifragility. Right? We are, you already are antifragile. You’re just not using antifragility in a certain area. Right. So I’ll explain how that works and I can prove it to you. So if you want to get in shape, if you want to get healthy, get in shape, lose weight, whatever, build some muscle, you already know this because your body’s already antifragile. So how does that, how does that work? Imagine if you say I’m going to lose weight, I’m going to build muscle, I’m going to be lean, I’m going to be faster, more flexible, et cetera, and I’m going to start working five hours a day, every single day. What’s going to happen then? What do you think you’re going to give up after probably about one or two days because it’s too much? A, you’re going to give up. B, if you, if you persist, if you’re smart, you’re going to give up. If you persist, you will actually be destroy your body. Yeah, that’s true. Right? Yeah. Because your body will not recuperate and grow. It doesn’t have the opportunity to do so, you know, but if you do the 8020 principle in, in this area, this was going to happen. You’re gonna work out, you’re gonna work out and rest, work out and rest, and work out and rest. Let’s say three, four times a week, you go to the gym, you hit it for 45 minutes, you change muscles and you push yourself. And most of the time you stay within what you are able to do. Lift, let’s say, or run. And then for just a little bit, right, you stretch yourself, let’s say the 20% principle. And because you stretch yourself for just 20%, just 20% of the overall time, just a little bit, your body will become, will get the signal, get the message, get the memo, start getting stronger, more agile, faster. Your brain will actually coordinate with your, with your body and will become more cognitive. You actually become smarter if you do that. So that, that principle applies to everything, all areas of life. So, so it’s, it’s sort of the same thing, right? If you want to, you know, you start a business and you usually are good at some certain things and less good in other things, right. Nobody’s good at everything. And you have, you know, only X amount of hours a day. So if you develop these principles, this, these lifestyle changes that allow you to stretch yourself every single day, 20%, just a little bit. Right. It’s gonna not kill you. Right. Because you, like, imagine taking that course and you, and you go, okay, I have five courses that I lapsed on. Five courses, let’s say. Imagine that. I’m not saying that’s you five courses. I’m going to literally binge on, on all the five courses and I’m going to finish all of them in a week. What’s going to happen? You’re going to retain nothing. Yeah. That’s for sure. But if you say no, I’m going to do 45 minutes every single day from 9am to 9:45am then I’m going to take another 15 minutes, sort of absorb it, take some notes, and then I take, I’m going to take half an hour to implement some of this stuff. I’m going to go take what I’ve learned and I’m going to do something with it. I guarantee you, you will have transformational growth in like 30 days. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I agree 100% in so many ways because I’ve definitely experienced it with a course that I’m doing right now. And also going back, Gosh, it’s been maybe 20 years now since the last time I did this. Well, I, I have done marathons in the past and they teach you the same way is that you, you can’t just immediately go out unless you’re, you know, you know, amazing, you know, runner, and just go out and expect to run 26.2 miles tomorrow. No, you’ve got to build up to that. And you do stretch yourself and you have to rest. You can’t run every single day either. Yes. You’re running like three times a week and then you do some other cross training or something. So. Yeah, no, that’s the one thing that I am shocked at. I’m not surprised at, but I’m shocked that every single time is when I coach people. These are high performers. Right. These are people who want to get things done. And the culture that we’re in glorifies workaholism and glorifies this sort of the hustle culture. And there’s a, probably a sliver, maybe like 1% of people who could potentially do well in the short term with hustle culture and this sort of wear itself, you know, just, just do things until. And sleep under the desk kind of thing. Right. 99%. Will, Will. Will never do well. And workaholism is, is Is. Is endemic in America. And if you. If you translate that, if you really want to be a high performer, really truly want to be a high performer in anything, compare yourself to any Olympic athlete. Show me one athlete that goes to the Olympics and competes in a depleted state, and I’ll show you the athlete who doesn’t get. Who doesn’t medal at all. Yeah, right. But it somehow doesn’t translate into work culture. That’s why I. Sabbath. That’s why I have sort of these rhythms that I teach people about on that you cannot. You cannot grow. You cannot be a high performer if you’re depleted. Yeah. You have to never be depleted. And you have to work really, really intensely every day. How do you do that? You can totally do that. Yeah. And. And it’s. I’ve heard this from. From other folks that I. I respect, and they’ve. They champion this idea of actually to go slow in order to go fast, because you do have to take. You have to take breaks, whether it’s a mental break or a physical break. You. You can’t. Yeah. Like you said, you know. Yeah. There probably are 1% of the. Of people who can, you know, just keep going, going, but I. But I bet still, at some point they may. Yeah. And you also pay for it in other ways. Yeah. Yeah. Like three startups, three divorces kind of ways. Mm. Right. Yeah. Yeah, you pay for it for sure. I. I’m gonna ask you this question because I. Well, actually, to. No, I just remembered it because before we got on, I was going to ask you about something and I just. Yeah, I’m going to do that one first because I find it interesting. So I. I find it fascinating. I don’t know if you’ve ever thought of this before, but how. The names we are given. And I’m guessing that your parents gave you the name Christian. That how you are now emulating that in your life. Have you ever pondered that? I’ve actually pondered that, and you’re wrong. They didn’t give me that name, so my name was confusing. By the time I was out of college, I got a master’s degree in economics and I went completely the other way. I wanted to do music. All of my friends went into banking and finance and stuff, stuff like that. And I wanted to be a singer. Right. And it was right after the Soviet Union fell apart. So it was like this window of opportunity where it was completely free, no limitations, and anybody can try anything. And I said, okay, I’m going to try it. And my name, my birth name was Russian. Chilean. So it’s Ruslan Umberto Flores. And the Russians couldn’t pronounce my name. Basically, I had a branding problem, and I was very far from being a Christian, I assure you. And somehow. So to make your point, actually drive it home, is that I’m like, okay, Christian Ray is sort of neutral. Anybody can pronounce it in any language. I’m gonna do Christian Ray Flores. And then two years later, I became a Christian. So, yes, I believe that somehow words have power and, you know, just all words have power in general. But I would say words that are names definitely have power. Yeah, absolutely. And. And it’s interesting. I actually did a podcast episode last year about spiritual names and that. Yeah. Because it is. Sometimes you are. You were. It is your given name, but you can also change it. Yeah. And choose one. And so I love that you. And I also love that the universe, God, decided to say, okay, yeah, that’s a good name. So. Yeah, exactly. Or even maybe whispered in my ear. Yeah. Even before that. So it is. It is amazing, actually. It really is. Yeah. For sure. This is the other question I’m going to ask you, because I like to ask my guests this because I love the answers that we get. So what are you curious about right now? Ah, I’m curious about. I’m really curious about reinventing this season of life that I’m in. I just turned 56, like, a couple years. Couple weeks ago, and the kids are out of the house. Deb and I are enjoying empty nesting very, very much. And there’s sort of this new level of mobility, of freedom to it that I want to milk for all it’s worth? So that’s sort of. My new curiosity is, okay, how do I shape my next season so that I live even more exponentially than I live now, now that I have this sort of newfound independence. So to say you’re never. You’re never independent from your kids, and they’re never independent from you, but certainly they’re. They’re now basically out in the wild making their own decisions, which basically gives me permission to be out in the wild and making my own decisions. So I’m very curious about that. Well, yes, it is a. It’s a lovely experience and. And one that takes some getting used to. And I. I love that you’re actually embracing it with that curiosity and. And excitement, it seems like, in. In your voice. Because I. I hear about a lot of, well, women in particular who are just really pining away. And. And I will say sometimes I do miss being in having my kids nearby because one lives out of the country and one lives out of the state, and. But they’re, like, really bereft over that loss. That’s natural. Natural. It’s very natural. Well, I mean, women. Yeah. You are the nurturers. Right. And it’s profoundly primal. My wife’s the same way. And I am less of that in. And I. I embrace it as well, honestly. Right. Like, I miss them to death. It also helps that when your children are doing well, they’re in a good season, all three of them are sort of trending up, as I say, so it really helps. You’re not worried, basically. I’m not worried about them. Deb is not worried about them. Yeah, they’re just. They’re thriving, they’re happy, they’re puzzling. The twenties are to puzzle, you know, one of them just entered the 30s, so she’s, like, really adulting, you know, like. So. Yeah, so. So when. When. When your children, you know, and we’ve. We’ve devoted so much energy into. We poured time energy. We homeschooled two out of three. We build our lives around integrating their lives with ours. And we made all kinds of sacrifices when it comes to even business and. And income to be present, to never miss anything. And it’s paying off. It’s paying off because they’re thriving. Right. So when you’re in that place, what. That you invested and you never, you know, never know. Right. What’s going to happen. True. And you see the fruit of. Of this investment, of the sacrifice to actually pay off, you know, that. That my next season, in our next season with Deb is really more of a celebration of that because we feel like, you know, we did well. We did well. We deserve this. Absolutely. Yes. Yes. And I’m very fortunate, too. And then I am very, very blessed to have two amazing grown children, one. One in their 30s and one about to turn 30 and shortly. So. And he’s even getting married now this year, which is exciting. So. Yeah. Yeah, it’s very cool. Well, I know I’ve enjoyed this, and our time has flown by rapidly. And so I would love for you to share if someone you know is listening to you and would love to be able to connect with you, learn more about you, where. How can people do that? So if you. If you feel like, okay, those insights are helpful. The best way to connect is to go to my newsletter, ChristianRay Flores.com it’s. There’s a free version that comes every Sunday, and then there’s a sort of in depth for subscribers. It’s just a few dollars a month. I think it’s a great investment. Highly recommend it ChristianRayFlores.com It’s a newsletter that’s one place the other one if you feel like okay, this kind of Christian speaks my language. It speaks the language of my heart. And I’d like to learn more about coaching. Go to Exponential Life Exponential spelled with an X without the e. And you can reach out. But you also can find a really great assessment that we put a lot of work with and we actually use it with all of our clients. It’s called the Exponential Scorecard and what it does this is both based on my decades of experience but also the best research out there, the best studies out there. It basically gives you a really great at a glance report on this is where you are along the most important dimensions of life. This report that you get back the scorecard is highly predictive for your success and it doesn’t mean you don’t have any flat sides. Even if you have flat sides. It’s really good to know you have flat sides that you can this is the stuff you need to work on. So highly recommend taking that. It takes about five minutes probably to complete complete like 40 questions. So you can find it at Exponential Life. All right, excellent. Well, I will have both of those websites in the in the show notes and and description on YouTube as well. So so don’t worry about trying to write it down right now. I will have it in there. So I appreciate that and I really appreciate you being here. Is there any other last little tidbit of wisdom? Anything else I should have asked you about that I did not that you like to leave our audience with today. You know, I would say this especially I know you you told me many of the women listening, many of the audience are women. Many of them are sort of entrepreneurial types. Maybe not all of them, but I think you’re entrepreneurial in life anyway. You’re a creator as we said. Right. And the life of somebody who really embraces that that kind of creativity. You’re. I highly recommend you aim higher than you think you should aim. Here’s why. You know, because it’s hard. It’s very easy to get to convince to aim lower, you know, like lower your expectations basically. Right. And I that’s primal that I that’s understandable. But it’s not useful to you. I think aiming higher is better and I’ll tell you why this is statistically true that most people will aim for the middle because they want to fit in and they don’t want to fail and they don’t want rejection from the tribe. So the middle is super crowded. So if you aim to the middle, you’re actually making your, your life super hard. Harder than it should be. If you aim higher, it’s going to be harder to do that and maintain that optimism and that creativity and that passion. Right. That’s why you get coaching for that. But you will do much, much better because it’s less crowded. Yeah, I love that. And there’s, I think there’s a lovely quote about, I think it’s even by an advertising guy, if memory serves me correct, that if you aim for the star, even if you fall, you’re still going to hit the moon. Yeah, exactly. Absolutely. Absolutely. No, but, but I really do think that’s like a mindset anchor that we should have. Yeah. Oh, for sure. Oh, this has been wonderful. Thank you so much for joining us today. I, I suspected it was going to be, but it, I think it even exceeded my expectations. So I appreciate you joining us today, Grace. I’m grateful to be here. Thank you. And I do want to also thank all of you for joining us today. And I hope you also received as much value as I did. There was lots of really good nuggets there. So I hope you’re taking notes or go back and listen to it again and write them down. So until next time. And of course, I’ll just do quick plug. If you’re not subscribed already. What are you waiting for? Subscribe and wherever you watch or listen to this. And until next time, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

Did you know that chakra healing can help entrepreneurs find the strength to move forward again when life’s storms disrupt their business journey? I know from personal experience how losing a loved one can cause chakra imbalances that shake the foundation of your entrepreneurial spirit and wreak havoc on your day-to-day operations. Show Notes | Transcript “Even when you know life is giving you lemons, you can still come out the other side.” – Gloria Grace Rand In this heartfelt episode, I open up about my own journey through grief after losing my sister and how it affected my business. I share how working with a spiritual coach and focusing on chakra healing helped me realign my purpose and reignite my passion for my work. Discover how to: Recognize signs of chakra imbalance in your business practices Use grounding techniques to stabilize your root chakra and business foundation Reignite your creativity when your sacral chakra feels blocked Reclaim your personal power and set healthy boundaries in your work Reconnect with your heart-centered purpose to attract aligned clients Key insights include: The impact of grief and life transitions on your business energy How undercharging and people-pleasing relate to chakra imbalances The importance of giving yourself time to grieve, even business changes Why investing in yourself leads to greater commitment and results How to use light language for chakra healing and business alignment I also guide you through a powerful light language transmission designed to help realign your chakras and bring your business back into flow. Whether you’re feeling stuck, disconnected from your purpose, or simply in need of an energetic reset, this episode offers compassionate guidance and practical strategies to help you navigate business evolution during times of personal transition. Tune in to start harnessing the wisdom of your chakras and rediscover your authentic business path. Remember, even when life hands you lemons, you have the power to create something sweet and refreshing for your entrepreneurial journey. Ready to experience the transformative power of light language one-on-one? Book a personalized session and address your unique business challenges at bit.ly/LLEpodcast30 Related episodes: How to Gain Insight from Your Chakras with Dr. Susan Corso: https://gloriarand.com/how-to-gain-insight-from-your-chakras-with-dr-susan-corso/ Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. If you are in a season of transition, let’s say you’re going through a divorce or separation or maybe you’ve lost a loved one, I know from experience that it can knock the wind out of your sails and leave you questioning how to move forward in your business. So today we’re going to be talking about how you can actually explore how your chakras can guide you through this business evolution as you’re going through these transitions and be able to find some grace through, through the process. So even when you know life is giving you lemons, you can still come out the other side. But first, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage. Especially if this is your first time joining us. Whether you found us on YouTube or on one of the other wonderful audio podcast platforms. I am the founder of Align to Shine Academy and I empower women over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are and lead boldly and shine their light in the world. So as I mentioned, if you are finding us somewhere and you’d like what you hear, I hope you that you will subscribe and hit that little notification bell on YouTube. I guess so. I, as I mentioned, right at the top there, I know exactly how a sudden event, let’s shall we say, can like just really knock you around and have you start doubting what you’re doing, the direction that you’re taking in your life and your business. And for me, it was, I can’t believe, almost 10 years ago, just about now as I’m recording this. And it was in, in, In July of 2015, my sister got news that she was certainly not expecting when she was diagnosed with stage four cancer. And unfortunately she transitioned like 18 months later. And when that happened, I mean, she was my big sister. She was the last member of the family, the immediate family that I grew up with. Both my parents have been gone for a long time and I lost a brother early on when I was a teenager. So she was, she was my rock, she was my cheerleader. And when I didn’t have her around anymore, just tearing up, even thinking about it right now, that, yeah, it, it really, it messed me up for quite a while. You know, at the time my business was SEO copywriting and it was, you know, help writing content, small businesses for their websites and doing even a little social media. I was even doing some video SEO at the time as well. And so when I lost her, I, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do anymore. And, and thankfully I was in a Mastermind at the time that, that helped. I had a lot of coaches I was working with, but in particular I actually have a. I had had a friend who I’d known for a few years through women’s networking group who was a spiritual coach. And she actually specialized in chakras and chakra healing. And her name is Sherinata Pollock. She’s also really big into emf, snail and, and, and helping you to using Shungite to be able to offset some of these energies. So maybe I’ll put a link to her site in the, in the show notes. But at the time she was, she was doing this spiritual coaching and helping you with your chakras and healing, like noticing when your chakras are out of balance and helping you to realign them. Now I’m not going to. Oh, also, at the time she also, she also saw for me, which is so, so prescient, I think is the word I’m looking for. Prescient. I’m not sure how you pronounce it. I’ve seen it in print before that she saw for me something about spiritual SEO, which I actually did an episode about just a couple of months ago on this podcast. So go check it out. I’ll. I’ll put the link to that in the show notes as well. So you can go, go check it out because that’s a whole nother story. But I want to focus on chakras today, so I’m not going to go too deep into what chakras are. You can Google it or, you know, in fact, I even, I even had, a couple years ago, I think I had a woman who did, who talked about chakras. Her name was Susan Corso, as I believe. But chakras are essentially energy centers in the body and there are like seven main ones, you know, so well, starting at the bottom, we have the, the root chakra. And then you’ve got the, the, the sacral chakra, the solar plexus, your heart chakra, your throat chakra. Then you’ve got your third eye and the crown chakra. And then there’s even. Cause I’ve studied some of this stuff before as well. There’s even like one like above, I don’t remember the name. And then one even like below your feet. There’s another one in like the Earth. So it’s a lot of stuff. But. But essentially, again, this is, you know, this comes from like Eastern, I guess, Indian origins philosophy. But, but they’re like centers that they, they say are like energy centers that, that spin and when they’re maybe stuck or not spin, that can show up in, in your life and in what’s going on in your life. So it can also then affect your business because of course, as it’s affecting you and in particular if you are, let’s say a solo entrepreneur, then, you know, if you’re the face of your business, you’re the primary person in your business, if you’re, you know, not feeling right or your, your mental state is not right, then that’s going to show up in your business. And that’s what we’re going to really talk about today. So what I’m going to go through actually first, what I’m going to suggest that you do today is maybe pause this recording right now and go get yourself a pen and paper because I’m going to go through a lot of stuff today and you’re going to want to take some notes and of course you can always listen to it again and, and go back and listen to the recording. But I really encourage you to grab a pen and paper because I’m going to go through a lot of stuff and I’m gonna, I’m gonna go through first. I’m going to tell you a little bit about each chakra, a little bit more in depth about what, what sort of, what their purpose is. But then I’m only going to focus on five of the seven today, so, and especially of like what it looks like when they’re out of alignment and then give you some tips on how to get them back in alignment. And I’m also going to share a light language message as well to help with that. So. All right, so let me go through these again or go through these now and give you a little bit of information about, in, in case, especially if this is your first time and you’re not familiar with, with, with chakra. So the root chakra, sort of as it implies, deals with your foundation and, and security and, and in business it can be really about sort of grounding your business purpose. The sacral chakra moving up is your creative center. You know, this is in, in women in particular. Well, I don’t think men as well, you know, this is where, you know, babies. So this is, you know, your, your passion center and this is where you, if this is, you know, when it’s in alignment, this is your ability to create authentic offerings. The solar plexus is going up now. This is your power center, your personal power center, your confidence and decision making. And so you want to be able to have a good Solar plexus in that’s really spinning well so that you can make effective decision decisions. The heart, of course, the heart is all about connection and service and authentic relationships. The throat, naturally, communication, expression, sharing your truth. The third eye that you know right between your forehead or well, well in the middle of your forehead, sort of right in between your eyebrows, you know, right above that area. That’s your intuition, your, your vision, strategic insight. And then the crown chakra is your connection really your connection to source. It’s that spiritual connection, purpose and legacy. So what does it look like when some of these chakras are out of alignment? So as I mentioned, we’re going to just focus on five. I’m going to leave out the third eye. I’m like pointing to my nose for some reason. Boy, that’s really silly. That’s not where the third eye is. Your third eye is not on the nose. No, your third eye is under forehead and the crown. And maybe I’ll do a different episode and I’ll just focus in on that. But for now we’re just going to focus on sort of the lower, lower chakras and then, and then the one higher one which is the throat. So, so root chakra, when that one is out of balance, that is can manifest as financial anxiety and you know, an inability to commit to your business direction in, when you’re going through some sort of life transition, it can leave you feeling like you’ve got no foundation to build upon. And how it shows up in business in particular is where perhaps you’ve got inconsistent pricing or you’re, you’re making fear based decisions. Maybe you’re, maybe you’re just, you know, I’m thinking like shiny object syndrome, you know, comes up where it’s like, okay, I’m gonna grab onto this because this is going to help me out. I’m gonna grab onto that note, this is my solution. I’m gonna, you know, but you’re not taking the time to really figure it out and say is this, to evaluate it and say, is this really what is going to serve my highest and best good and the good of my business? The, the sacral chakra has mentioned. This is creativity. So when it’s out of balance, this is where you’ve got, you know, maybe you’re struggling to come up with a blog article because I know for me I used to do, way back when, when I was first doing my business and for the first, I guess six years, six, seven years of my business, I was writing a blog article at least Once a week, sometimes even twice. I was doing infographics for a while. It’s like that second post. So I was doing that. I was sending out. I originally started doing like a monthly email, and then I, then I started doing one every two weeks. And then I think I was even doing one a week when, you know, leading up to when my sister passed. And then after that, boy, I did not feel like sending out emails every week. I’ve certainly stopped doing that. I was not blogging every week, so. And that was one of the things that I had to work on with, with Sherinata was, was because she, she saw that my sacral shock. Sacral chakra. Boy, try to see. I can’t even say. Try to say that three times fast. Sacral shaka. Yeah, I’m not going to do it. That’s a tongue twister. Oh, my goodness. But anyway, yeah, and, and that loss of passion for your work, that’s why I was like feeling stuck. I wasn’t sure I wanted to continue doing the copywriting because I was also feeling this pull to do something else, which led to my book over here, you know, and that was a later, later thing. But so, yeah, and, and how that also could show up, you know, is not, not doing the things that you know are helpful for your business, which is doing, like social media marketing, for instance. It can be, maybe you’re, you’re, you’re not putting out any new offers, or maybe you’re not, you’re not able to come up with some new ideas because your creativity is blocked. Solar plexus, now that is, that’ll show up when you’ve got an imbalance. I want to take a breath for a moment. I get excited and I’ll. And I’ll keep talking fast without pausing. So let me pause for a moment. Solar plexus will show up as people pleasing. Difficulty making decisions, of course, and feeling powerless about your business direction. And that can lead to things like undercharging. You know, you’re not, not charging your worth and not setting good boundaries, whether in your business or even in, or in your personal life. You know, you may find that you are just working with any client, even ones that are putting a big drag on your time, just because you’re like, okay, I know I need to keep things going. And, you know, even though I’m not a happy person at the moment because of whatever’s going on, I got to keep things going. And so you get into that desperation mode and what you put out, you attract. So when you’re in that state, it’s not great for your business. Not at all. Heart chakra. So imbalances here, it’s. Can show up as where you really are feeling disconnected from your purpose. You’re having trouble connecting with clients. You’re not communicating very well. You’re. Well, not, not only communicating, because we’re going to get to that with a throat, but it’s really about. You’re not making those strong relationships you’re at. And I’ll say also even with connecting, connecting with prospects, you’re having trouble connecting with prospects. And it can have you feeling like again, you’re serving from obligation rather than love. That’s why I mentioned before where you’re maybe just taking on clients that if you were really in alignment, you wouldn’t be taking them on. But you feel like you have to, you’ve got to keep things going. And the problem with that is you can burn yourself out really fast because you’re just stressing yourself out. Again, you’re going to attract these misaligned clients that are not serving your highest interest. And, and then you’re not serving their highest interest either. Yeah, because for whatever reason, you’re, you’re. Well, you’re attracting them because of this. You want to be able to help them, you know, and, and no matter what. And they may be coming to you because you’ve decided that you’re, you’re gonna offer a really good deal, you know, too good a deal, frankly, a price on an offering or something, just because you want to keep, keep going, get, you know, get, get, get people in the door, as it were. Well, then they’re going to be there. You know, people who are just attracted to good deals don’t necessarily do the work to get the results that you want them to achieve because they’re just looking for an easy deal. I mean, and I’ve been guilty of this too. How, how often have you seen somebody offering something for free or really maybe it’s a course for a really discounted price, and you’re like, oh, that sounds good, and you grab it. Did you finish the course or did you start it and then lose interest and go do something else? The difference between courses where I’ve invested thousands of dollars in them versus 25 or $50 and the finish rate, number one, and the success rate, number two, is astounding because things that I’ve, and I know this, I’ve talked to other entrepreneurs as well. This is, this is not just me, lots of people. We do this. We, again, not exactly shiny Object syndrome. But in a way because it’s like, oh, okay, this is cheap and easy, sure, I’ll get it done. But when you invest a lot of money in something, you’re gonna do your darndest to get it done. I’m telling you because like the mastermind that I invested in years ago, I mean that was the most money I’d spent on really education since my, since college days. So this was serious ser. This moolah that I invested. So I made sure that I attended all of the training that they had, all of the coaching calls that were offered, everything because I wanted to get my money’s worth out of it. So that’s why you want to get your heart chakra aligned, so that you are attracting people who are going to do the work, who are going to invest in you and are gonna get the results that you want them to get. Instead of these fly by night folks, we’re just looking for a good deal. Okay, last one for today and like I said, maybe later on I’ll, I’ll deal with the other two. But for now is the throat chakra imbalance. So that is shows up as difficulty expressing your truth, fear of visibility, feeling like you don’t know what to say anymore, frankly. And so that shows up with inconsistent messaging, marketing that doesn’t convert your being reluctant to do videos, let’s say, or because you don’t want to show up on camera or just even writing articles or even, you know, I think it really turns into like procrastination because you don’t want to put anything out because you, you’re not sure what your message is number one. And then number two, it’s like, well, since I don’t know what my message is, I’m just not going to put anything out. And I already mentioned before how I wasn’t blogging, I wasn’t emailing as often. And the problem with that is out of sight, out of mind folks. It’s a fact of life that if you’re going to run a business, you’ve got to do some type of marketing, you’ve got to be out there in front of people in some way. Now, thankfully, there are a multitude of ways that you could show up. There’s emails, there’s blogs, there’s videos, there’s social media channels, you know, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, tick tock. Now you know, you can, you can be posting articles on substack. You know, there’s lots of, lots of platforms, platforms you can have a podcast even. You can do public Speaking, whether that’s, you know, at. At some other person’s group, let’s say, or you could be doing webinars. I mean, there’s so many ways, endless ways for you to get your message out, but when that throat chakra is out of whack because of some sort of something that’s going on, something in your life, then it’s really challenging to do that. So what do you do? How do you even know what chakra is out of whack? Well, what I would do, number one, is to, like I said, hopefully go back in and listen to this, see if any of those areas seem familiar to you. Are you finding yourself that you’re undercharging or you’re not posting as often as you used to, or you’re making poor decisions. And so kind of look at that, you know, and ask yourself, where do I feel most blocked in my business right now? And in fact, I would journal about this. Spend some time journaling. Which, you know, ask yourself which chakra feels most out of balance? And what is my body telling me about my current business path? Because I tell you, the body, there’s a lot of wisdom in the body. And I’ve, I’ve done. I hope that you’re a subscriber and I hope you’ve listened to some of the episodes that I’ve done about this, because I know I’ve had wonderful guests on the, on the show who are really experts in, like, somatic wisdom and things like this, because I know sometimes that when, not only when our chakras are out of whack or when things happen, that it can show up as a pain in your body or, or it can even trigger an illness. I, I know after my sister passed, I started having a lot of back issues. And, and I think it’s because I was, I was sort of. That’s where I’d had back problems for years, frankly. But it was like, it, it was really bad. And I think it’s because I was holding on to a lot of the grief there in my back. So, yeah, so, so, and of course, you know, if you’ve done, if you answer all these questions and you’re like, I don’t know, I’m still not sure, then that would be the time where I would encourage you to talk with somebody. If you, you know, talk with a friend maybe, or a, if you have a coach already, you know, talk with them about it. If you know somebody in your, in your circle who is a spiritual coach, like my, like my friend Sherinata is, who is an expert in chakras. You know, go talk to them about it. You can also, if you want to reach out to me because, you know, you could definitely do that. Go to EngageWithGloria.com and, and schedule a call because oftentimes we. What is it? Not, not necessarily you can’t see the forest for the trees, but we have blinders on a lot of times and we have to talk it out with someone, Someone else can see it like within two seconds. Oh, I got it. Do you hear, do you hear yourself? I, I had a coach one time who would say, Gloria, do you know what you just said? And I’m like, no, what did I say? And she like rattled off what I just said and it was like, oh, I didn’t realize. So often we will just, you know, speak things out that, that are related to this, but we’re not, we’re not aware of it. So I encourage you to do that. And I’m also going to suggest some ways. So let’s say, let’s pretend right now that you’re like, oh, I think my root chakra is out of whack or no. Oh, oh, I don’t know. I think it’s that solar plexus. Oh, okay, we’re gonna do a couple of these. I, I left out the throat one for some reason. So in my notes, I don’t know why I, why I left that off. But we’re gonna, we’re gonna do a little bit of, give you some ideas how you can help to start getting your chakra back in alignment. And then I’m also going to do in a little bit share a light language message with you as well. So, so stick around for that. So what can you do when your root chakra is out of balance? For one thing is do some grounding work. You know, go outside and put your feet on the, on the ground and get grounded because you need to be able to create some stability in your life during transition. Again, talk with, if you’re going through say a challenging relationship, you know, talk with a marriage counselor or if you’re going through grief. I’ve got, I’ve got a lovely friend who lost her husband earlier this year and she’s joining a, some sort of grief group. It’s like a 13 week program so that she can work with other people and help her through this transition that she’s going through. And, and for your business then is to start look at what, what could be a non negotiable that you want to start setting up for yourself, you know, set up some new non negotiables and then also take some steps for financial grounding as well. During this, you know, change, figure out, you know, maybe it, maybe it requires you to talk with your financial advisor and, and sure, everything is, is good. If you are a business owner, let’s say you’ve got employees, maybe it’s something you might want to start thinking about. What’s going to happen to the business when you don’t want to run it anymore? Is it something that you’re going to want to sell or is it something that you’re going to want to, that you can just, you know, shut down, you know, start thinking about those things for your shape. Here we go again. Trying to say sacral chakra. There we go. Do it slowly. Sacral chakra. So do something. If you, if you really are feeling stuck, create creatively. Start trying to do some things to reconnect with that. So maybe you do something you’ve never done before. Let’s say that you, you always, you know, you’re a writer, but maybe you could try painting for a little while. Or in my case, I could since I don’t often play. I do play musical instruments. I play the keyboard and guitar. I would just like dig my guitar out and start playing because when I’m playing music, that really makes me feel good. So, so do something. You know, maybe it’s pulling out one of those, you know, they’ve got coloring books for adults if you’re into that. Find some way do something different creatively to, to get those creative juices flowing again. You might also want to spend some time, number one is maybe journaling about what still lights you up and then do those things. And, and then as you’re doing that, I think it’s going to help you to be able to start looking at how you can then transform your services and, and in an authentic way. All right, solar plexus. What can we do? So this was again about your personal power. So you want to do something that’s going to help you to reclaim your authority. And I think what I would say is this would be a good time to spend time in practices like meditation, whether it’s sitting meditation, whether it’s walking meditation. You know, I’ve mentioned journaling a lot as well, but, but something that’ll help you to really start connecting within and to be able to help you then to be able to start making decisions that are, that you feel more aligned with and, and then start making sure that you’re setting boundaries for yourself. So I know at one point in my career as, as a copywriter, I was pretty much available 24 7. Well, not really 24 7, but I was available a lot on the weekends, which did not make my husband happy with. So set some boundaries, give yourself space, give yourself limits so that you’re not constantly at somebody else’s beck and call. And that might even mean setting boundaries within your own family as well. And yeah, so that’s, that’s going to help. Then the last one we’re going to talk about is the, is your heart. So to be able to sort of developing, getting back in alignment and having heart centered leadership is to spend some time connecting with your deeper why. And, and again, like all of these things, it really requires you to spend some time by yourself frankly to, I mean some, sometimes to be with other people, but I think really spend some time going within and, and doing a lot of deep introspection and, and also giving yourself time. I’m going to come back to this heart in a minute. But, but I wanted to make this point because it was coming up for me a second ago. Give yourself time to grieve. And I don’t mean even if it’s not a, you’re not dealing with the death of a loved one like in my case, my sister. But, but maybe it’s the death of a marriage, you know, or a long time relationship. Maybe you’ve, maybe, maybe you realize that the business, you don’t want to do this business anymore. And maybe you’ve been doing it for many years but you’re like, I just don’t want to do it anymore. I’ve just, I really have, I’ve, I’ve lost my passion for it. It’s okay to grieve that because you invested time and money and resources in growing this business and, and it’s okay to give it up now if it doesn’t serve you anymore. Interesting. Sorry. Getting emotional today. And I’m gonna have to do some introspection after this for myself to see what’s coming up for me. Why am I getting so emotional about this anyway? Yeah. So when you can start to really get back connected with, you know, maybe you do want to continue this business. Maybe you just want to pivot it a little bit and do something a little bit different. Then you’re going to be able to move beyond obligation to be inspired again and to, and to have that ability to then attract the kind of clients that you want to work with. And, and I know for me when I did the work, when I did not only in. And spending time in, in letting go some of these things so that I could grieve my sister, but when I started practicing what I call the Love method and, and love is an acronym. When I started doing that then I was able to start posting on social media again. I was able to be authentic again. So I hope that’s been helpful today. So what I want to do now before we close out today’s episode, I’m glad to see my. My Internet is being a little spotty today. So I’m hoping, hoping things are coming out okay. What I, I wanted you is and I just realized that probably part of the problem was that I had some other things open. Other things open that I should not have had open. Oh well, anyway, what I’d like to share with you right now is light language message and light language is, it’s a, it’s a multi dimensional method of communicating and it, I speak and, or sing it usually and sometimes even use my hands, but it’s, it contains frequencies that bypass your mind and, and it allows you to heal energetically and, and it really does connect directly to your chakra system. You know, you can really, it’ll. It’ll connect to your, your third eye, to your, to your heart in particular. So it’s not something that the logical part of your brain is going to necessarily understand to be able to translate. So don’t worry about that. Just set the intention that the message that comes through today is going to help you to realign your chakras and to then realign also your business chakras, as it were, as well. So what I encourage you to do is if you are listening to this podcast while you are driving a car, to pause and come back to it later when you can be at home or somewhere else where you can sit down and be grounded. Have your feet on the floor and you might want to close your eyes so that way you can just allow the sounds to not let other things outside distract you. Like I said, don’t worry about my. Because you don’t need to see if I do move my hands. You don’t need to see about it. It’s energy. This is all about energy. So I invite you to sit down. I’m gonna. Okay, I’m trusting that you’ve paused this and now you’re back. So sit down, close your eyes and again set the intention that the message that you’re going to receive today will help you to be. To align whatever chakras need aligning right now so that you can have your business be in alignment. So. Okay, that’s what I’m going to set. I’m going to take a drink of water first before I start. Okay. There we go. All right, Sam, I think that helped me too. I hope it helped you. And I will also invite you that to. If you ever want to experience the power of light language one on one, I would love for you to reach out to me and schedule a session. I do. I will do, you know, work. I work online, you know, through. Through Zoom. We will record it through Zoom and we’ll talk beforehand a little bit about what’s going on in your life. And that way I am able to ask for the guidance, ask for that message that’s going to really be tailored to you to address your specific unique challenge that’s going on in your life. So you can do that. I will have the link for that in the, in the show notes as well, so make sure that you check that out if you’d like to be able to do that. Yeah, it’s a bitly link, so I’m not even going to speak it. Just go to the show notes and find it. Okay. So I don’t have to deal with that. All right. Or, and of course, if you’re watching this on YouTube, you should be able to see the link right there. I’ve got it going right there. So there you go. All right. Oh, now I would invite you to do one other thing here, is that right after this podcast is done and I’m ending it in just a second, is that I encourage you to spend a few time, few minutes journaling and, and just first I invite you just to sit a little bit and sort of let that message come through and just see if it percolates something with your higher self and then journal about it and say, maybe just journal and say what wants to emerge in my business now and see what comes up for you. And I hope you are subscribe to the podcast because one second, I’ve got to. I’ve got to mute the mic for a second. I cough. Okay, there we go. Next week, oh, I’ve got an interview with an amazing guest who’s going to be talking about resilience. His name is Christian Ray Flores and he’s an entrepreneur, an international recording artist, a philanthropist, and a high performance coach who empowers business and nonprofit leaders to reach and stay at the top of their game. So you don’t want to miss that one. So until then, until we meet again online. I am Gloria Grace Rand, and I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

Have you ever dreamed of entering the book publishing world to share your wisdom as a best-selling author? If you’re ready to turn that dream into reality and amplify your message globally, you’re in for a treat. In this enlightening episode, I sit down with Cathy Derksen, an international speaker and 18-time number one best-selling author, to explore the power of collaborative books and how they can elevate your visibility as an entrepreneur. Show Notes | Transcript “We all have a story that could help somebody else getting through similar challenges or overcoming a similar obstacle in their life.” – Cathy Derksen Cathy shares her journey from being a first-time author to creating a platform that empowers women to share their inspiring stories. We discuss the surprising benefits of collaborative publishing and how it differs from traditional solo book projects. In this episode, you’ll discover how to: The unexpected advantages of collaborative book projects over solo ventures How to leverage your author status to boost your credibility as an entrepreneur The mindset shift that occurs when women transition from aspiring authors to published best-sellers Common pitfalls to avoid when seeking publication and how to navigate them Key insights include: Why your unique story matters and how it can inspire others The importance of vetting collaborative publishers before committing to a project How to assess the value of different publishing opportunities The potential of using your book as a powerful marketing tool for your business Cathy also introduces the concept of author retreats, combining writing workshops with self-care and networking opportunities. She shares her vision for future projects, including exciting international destinations for these transformative experiences. Whether you’re a seasoned entrepreneur looking to expand your influence or a spiritual healer yearning to reach a wider audience, this conversation offers valuable insights on how to share your wisdom through the written word. Tune in to learn how you can become a published author and open doors to new possibilities in your personal and professional life! Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Cathy: website: inspiredtenacity.com LinkedIn: @cathyderkseninspiredtenacity Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Gloria Grace Rand Namaste. Imagine turning your wisdom into a best selling book that opens doors worldwide. Well, if you’d like to do more than imagine and actually get your message out in the world in a bigger way, you’re going to want to stick around to hear my conversation with today’s guest who helps women publish their stories. But first, if this is your first time to Live Love Engage, I want to welcome you and introduce myself. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy and I work with spiritually minded women entrepreneurs to break free from self doubt and step into their highest potential. And joining us in just a moment is Cathy Derksen and she is an international speaker and an 18 times number one best selling author. That’s amazing. Kathy has created a platform for women to share their wisdom and inspiring stories in collaborative books and her programs allow you you to expand your global network, build your business and increase your visibility while becoming an international best selling author. And I am going to bring her on right now so we can get to talking all about the wonderful world of publishing and books and all that good stuff. So welcome to Live Love Engage, Cathy. Cathy Derksen Thank you for having me. Gloria Grace Rand Well, I appreciate, appreciate you. We just met recently and I was just really impressed by all the stuff that you’re doing and I love that you’re focused on helping women to get their message out. But I was wondering if you could maybe before we dive into really the nuts and bolts why this is important, can you take us back maybe to your first book and what inspired you to take that leap and maybe what surprised you most about the journey? Cathy Derksen Well, as most people that get into these multi author books, the first book that I was in, I was just one of the authors in somebody else’s book. And before that one, I had actually never really thought of myself as becoming an author or getting involved in the publishing world at all. And really the main reason I got into that book, it was a local group here and I’d been aware that they had been doing some books, I think that was their fifth book that I jumped into. And it was at that point I had just been through a divorce, a complete career change. I was now a single mom with two teenagers and had I had gotten to the point where I felt like the dust was starting to settle on all of that. And I knew that my story could help other women going through a similar thing to really get through their own challenges and struggles and get through that kind of thing. So that at the time was really my only goal was just that knowing that that my story could help other women. And from there I loved the process of being in these multi author books where you’re collaborating with a group of people, you’re all putting your story and your wisdom out in the world. And as was mentioned, I am now have just on Friday hit 18 books that I have been part of and now seven of those are my books. So they’re books that I have started with the theme and the title that I’ve created. I brought together the group of authors, I’ve you know, really coached them around developing their chapters and, and yes, release them out into the world as best selling authors. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, that’s amazing. What, what types of categories have your books been in? Is it kind of stayed in one area or do you have a broad range? Cathy Derksen Well, all my books have a different theme. So based on that we do vary a little bit. And I don’t know the names of the categories off the top of my head now there are several hundred of them so they’ve really diversified the categories. But some of the books that I’ve. And I’ll focus mainly on the books that are my projects. So like I said, there’s seven of them now. The first one was Embrace Courage, Midlife Awakening, Ripple, Effective Impact. The last three that I just had released actually in the last couple months were all focused on women in leadership in different areas. So one was focused on women in leadership or transforming leadership in business and community. One was on how women are impacting leadership in science and tech. And then the last one that we just released was specific to a community called Lead Hership Global. And, and so that book was Lead Hership Unveiled. So, so those ones being more on the leadership business side, other ones being more on the personal development and getting through challenges. But definitely a lot of focus is on women’s biographies, women in business, personal development, but many categories. And that’s part of the fun too of going through the Amazon launch and is that you can hit several categories with the same book. So you start with say three and as you hit number one of those ones you move to other categories and hit number one and some more categories and becomes almost part of that game of, of the Amazon system. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. I know having well published my own book and, and with, well, I didn’t publish it myself, I did have a publisher but he was, yeah, picking out the, the categories that he thought for sure that I would be able to hit that number one status so I could, I could put that label on my book. In fact, there it is, it says Amazon number one. Bestseller. But actually, and speaking of that, I, I would love to know what you think about the, like, the power of collaborative books and how they differ from like solo books projects, especially maybe in terms of reach and impact. Cathy Derksen Yeah. And I think for a lot of people, they have the idea that they need to just focus on a solo book. But what I’ve seen is I would say the vast majority of people who start a solo book never finish it. Or they might finish it, but they never publish it. Or if they publish it, they don’t do a bestseller campaign. And also, when you are in a solo book, it’s just you and your community getting the activity and the visibility out there. Whereas with a collaborative book, you have all of those people’s communities working together, building visibility and collaboration and connection. And most of my books, I have 20 women per book and they’re, they are literally from all over the world. In the last book that we just released, we had us, Canada, Australia, South Africa, Dubai, Sweden, Netherlands, Germany. So all over the world. So imagine you’re in a group of women from all over the world and you’re each. If you go back and look at my social media over the last couple weeks, we are all liking sharing, reposting, you know, so everyone’s community is just blending together. The last post that I did, I had over 1500 hits on it. And you know, that’s because we are all meshing together with all these different ones. So, so I, I won’t say that it’s an easy thing to do to hit international number one, but when you have 20 people working together, it makes it a lot easier. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. And I do know it is, it is challenging to write your own book. I mean, it took me five years from the time that I first got the idea to when I finally even started to write it, and then, and then get it done. Cathy Derksen Yes. Gloria Grace Rand Whereas I have been in some collaborative books as well. I’ve been in, I was in, I was in this one. It’s called Conceived to Lead. Not my picture on the front on the cover. But, but my story is in there and I’ve been in a couple of others as well. And I know why I did it. But why do, why do authors come to you? What, what other than this, you know, global visibility. But what is sort of like maybe the one or two, like, key reasons that people, you, business owners, in particular, entrepreneurs. Why, why should they decide to do a collaborative book? What’s their benefit? What are they thinking they, they’re going to get out of it. Cathy Derksen Yes. I think one of the key things is these women all do believe and know that our stories really do inspire and motivate and re-energize other women. You know, I think as women, we really, we do learn from each other’s stories and we do create role models through sharing our story. So that’s always a big part of it. But, but yes, when we look at, especially as an entrepreneur these days, I would say it’s almost become expected that you’re an author. So when people look at your profile, say they are comparing you, I, I hate comparing or saying we’re competing against each other. But if someone were looking at a couple of different people that do similar things and comparing you, you know what their credentials were. If one’s an author and the other one’s not, it definitely shifts how they look at you. And for those of you who are looking at becoming speakers as well, it’s definitely a huge thing that the people that are looking for speakers also look for. Do you have a book? Do you have something that you’re promoting? Something that the members of that group can then also go and follow you in another place. But those are a few of the main things that really working on being a speaker, sharing your story as a role model and expanding your community with all of those other communities. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. And in fact, it’s so funny that you, that you mentioned that as I attended a networking meeting today, it’s actually my group that I host, the Soulful Women’s Network, and someone brought up the fact that someone they knew was offering a webinar about how to write a book or how to get into a book. Because if you want to be a podcast guest, for instance, that being an author is a great way to do it because again, as you just said, it lends that credibility. And I know I always enjoy talking with authors as well. And in fact, I’m, I’m devouring a book right now of a future podcast guest. Watch out for. I just, I’m going to be leaving him an amazing review on Amazon because it’s just. I’m so, so impressed. I was impressed during our interview, but now that I’ve read the book, even more. I kind of wish I read the book first, but. But it’s all, but it’s all good, you know, and. Because it’s, but it’s great. So, yeah, that is a huge benefit of it. You know, one thing, and I, and I know this, I think sometimes, you know, we’ve got, you know, if you’re a creative person. If you’re a spiritual entrepreneur, you, you may think you’ve got like a whole lot of messages that you want to share and how. What’s your advice on helping someone to maybe find that one compelling story or teaching or something that they should focus on first? Cathy Derksen Well, I like to kind of take people back to what they’re doing as an entrepreneur because I would say the vast majority of entrepreneurs are doing what they’re passionate about and there’s a story behind why they’re doing what they’re doing. And to me that’s always a great place to start. And again, part of it depends on the theme of the book and what you’re focus is that you’re expected to write around. But one of the things that I always encourage my writers to think about is our chapters are a combination of your own journey, what you’ve learned along the way, what your process has been, and some tips or tools or strategies that you would want to share with the reader. And so looking at it from that point of view that when the person has finished reading your chapter now they know a bit about you, they understand why you’re doing what you’re doing. And by the end they’re thinking, I need to talk to her. And so it really becomes a powerful lead magnet in that way that you’re sharing your passion, focused on what it is, why you’re doing what you’re doing in a way that now that reader feels inspired to learn more about what you’re doing and hopefully that also feels inspired to sign up for your course or buy your next book or get involved in your community. So to me that’s a big part of it is just that, that taking someone from where your passion is, why you’re doing what you’re doing, and then have them think, I need to talk to her. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. In fact, I think I remember hearing somebody one time talk about that how like a book is sort of your, your business card on steroids. I’m not sure they said that, but I kind of like that. So that’s what I’m going to call it, on steroids. Because now this is a way for, to, to demonstrate, as you just said, you know, what your expertise is, why you, why you do what you do. And I tell you they’re also great for, I know so many networking events are, are still online, but for the ones that are in person, they make great door prizes. If you go to a networking event and you can, you know, have a, have your own book to give away, I know I’ve done that many times. And, and again, you know, even though you’re giving it away as opposed to selling, it’s always nice to, to sell books, but if you can give it away and then again, that, that’s endearing yourself to someone, I think. What, what, what do you think about that? Cathy Derksen Oh, definitely. And actually, over the summer last year, I, I joined our local Chamber of Commerce. And a, A big part of that was because I lived my life on zoom. And I just realized I need to have some real people time too. Gloria Grace Rand Yes. Cathy Derksen But that’s what I’ve done. I’ve given the, the Chamber of Commerce organizers a few of my books and, you know, pretty much at every event, they’re giving them away. And kind of going back to that point too, around, should your focus be on selling the book or should your focus be on building the visibility and credibility of the activity around being an author? And I find that that’s one thing that, that trips up a lot of new authors, is that they feel like they have to be focusing all their time and energy on selling the book. So selling one at a time and all, they’ll go do events and they’ll travel all over the place pushing their book. But to me, that’s not the best use of having the book or of their time. And yes, we always do our Amazon launch campaign, we always hit our international number one. But once that’s done, we don’t really focus on the selling numbers. We actually give away the PDF copy of our books to all of the authors to then share in any way they want to so they can then give them away to their community. They can, you know, if they want to, they could even sell them on their websites and that sort of thing. But to me, it’s more about getting it out there, getting your story out there and using your energy on that side of getting your message out, amplifying what’s in the book that other people will want to know and not focusing on selling copy, copy, copy. The, the reality is very little money is made from the sale of books. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. Cathy Derksen For, and especially these days when most copies are sold in Kindle, if you’re selling a Kindle for $1. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen You’re not making much per book. And even with the paperbacks, you know, if your book is being sold at 12 or $15, only a couple dollars are going back to the actual producer of that book. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen And that’s why with all of my books, what we do is we take all the Amazon proceeds and we donate it to a non profit. That makes sense because there just isn’t enough revenue made from selling the books to be starting to share it back among 20 people, especially around the world. Well, you’re now dealing with all kinds of other. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen Complications. So. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. You know, I’m curious about something else. Have you noticed a maybe a mindset shift in the women that you work for as they go from being this aspiring author to now becoming a published bestseller? Cathy Derksen Oh, definitely. And to me, that is one of the big focuses on why I’m doing this in the first place. Is part of my big focus really is around supporting midlife women to step into new opportunities and possibilities and to see that we are surrounded by opportunities and possibilities. As we mentioned earlier, so many people have it on their bucket list. I think they say 92% of people have it on their bucket list to be a published author, but only 3 to 5% ever do. And so what I see is that for the women who do get into these collaborative books, we get the book published, they hit their number one bestseller status and it just, it turns on a light bulb of, wow. I didn’t think I would ever accomplish that, but now I did, so now what else can I do? And one of the new things I’ve started adding to my projects too is we’re doing billboards in Times Square. So we’ll have the, the book and the images of the authors and, and that’s another one too. That, that’s another one of those check marks, those things that they thought would never happen in their lifetime. So now they’ve got the book, they’re a published author, they’re a bestseller. Check. Now you’re on a billboard. Wow, here I am. Check. You know, so it’s, to me, it, it just opens up a whole new thing about what’s next. What else can I do? Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. And. Yeah. And you know, what’s, what’s possible for me. Right. You know, yeah. Cathy Derksen Possibility is huge. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. What are some of the common mistakes that you see entrepreneurs make when trying to get published? And, and how can our listeners avoid them? Cathy Derksen I think one of the things I’ve seen, people still have the idea that it’s so much better to get picked up by one of the big publishing houses and they look at hybrid publishing as lesser, whereas I would get them to really review their facts and really get a better understanding of what they are stepping into. In most cases, if you get picked up by the big publishers, they now own your copy. So you no longer are the owner of what you’ve written. And another big part, people look at that check that advance that they’re hoping to get, whereas most of us, most people think of that as money they’ve just given you to go write your book. But really it is an advance against the sale of your book. So if they give you that money, then you release the book. If it doesn’t sell very well, you owe them that money back in most cases because it’s against the sale of the book. But one of the other big things that I’ve noticed that people think is around marketing the book. Most big publishers do not do significant marketing for you. One of their criteria of taking on an author is how big is your active community right now? Because they are using your community and marketing to get the book out there, not theirs. So think about that as well. It’s not about a big marketing campaign. Obviously, if you’re some of these big authors that they know are going to sell millions of copies, they are pumping those out. But for people who it’s your first book or you’re not very well known, it’s all around you and your community, not around the publisher and what they’re going to do for you. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, that’s for sure. Yeah. I learned that when I first started looking at doing my book. I had signed up for a writer’s boot camp with Hay House. And that was one of the things they emphasized was that, yeah, you need to be able to, you know, well, you have to create a whole. I forget what it is, but. But some sort of thing that goes in. In front of the book where, where you list out, like, you know, how many followers do you have on these different platforms? And what is your. I think in a way it’s like, what is your marketing plan for this book? Because, yeah, they’re not doing it unless you’re, you know, somebody like, you know, Mike Dooley who’s, you know, pumping out, you know, bestseller after bestseller. And so they can. They can give him that advance. They know they’re going to get it back. Cathy Derksen Or one of the other big ones, too. Is part of the contract in a lot of those groups is that you have to purchase X number of copies of your book. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen And in most cases, then the author ends up with their garage full of boxes of their books that they can’t get rid of. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen So that’s the other thing to look out for. Do not sign something that says that you now have to go buy a thousand copies of the book. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen Because now that advance they gave you has just been put into purchasing your own books that are now in your garage? Gloria Grace Rand Yes, absolutely. Oh, my goodness. Another question I want to ask you. And, and because, like I said, I’ve been involved in a couple different collaboratives. One it wasn’t. Didn’t turn out very good. There was a lot of people that were kind of grumbling about the person who was running it. And then the, the. Another one I did was, you know, it turned out fine. And I know, of course people are going to want to work with you naturally, but, you know, if for whatever reason they’re not going to. How can you go about vetting a collaborative publisher? I guess, you know, and. And to decide whether this is somebody that I want to work with. Cathy Derksen Well, I think part of it is, you know, looking at how often have they done this? Have they done this before? Is this a new thing? Part of it too. You can look at their system of publishing. So basically, with the publishing system, I have, I have one publishing group that I work with most of the time where a collaboration where I do the front end. I come up with my themes and titles and together my team of women, and then they take over with the actual publishing and marketing piece of it. And I would also ask, and I get this quite often people will ask to talk to other authors who have been in my books previously, so you can get some direct feedback from people that have been directly involved in those books and, and really getting a feel for the community as well. Like right now, we had a book that just launched on Friday, and if you go back into my social media, you’ll see a bonanza of activity. And so that’s really something I would look for because another publishing group that I’ve worked with before, they released the book, but there was like, nothing. It was like silence. And it’s. It’s like, this isn’t how it should be. And it’s funny that you’d mention that because that’s actually what sparked me getting into doing this as my business. As you mentioned, I’ve been in 18 books so far. I’ve worked with over a dozen different publishing groups with, you know, being involved in other people’s books where I was just one of the authors. And at one point, I was involved in two different books at the same time. One of them was kind of like the one you were describing. It was verging on nightmare. Yeah, sure. Is it going to get released? Is it not? Where did she go? You know, things like that. And at the same time, I was involved in another book where it was wonderful, the publishing group was active. They’re telling us what’s going on. They had everything organized for us. It was like they were building a community with us. And I was literally in this position with these two projects thinking this should be easy and fun. This should not be a nightmare. And it hit me, I thought, this is what I’m supposed to do. I’m supposed to create these opportunities for women to do this where it can be easy, it’s mainly done for you, it’s not a stressful thing. And I actually went to that publishing group that I loved working with and I said, hey, they’re the one. I propose this collaboration with them where I do the front end, they do all the publishing end, and we’ve been doing this now for three years. And I love it. Gloria Grace Rand I love that. That is so cool. And that’s interesting too, because I just recorded an episode recent recently where I talked about the power of collaboration and how, and how sometimes it does start out like that. It’s where you’re. Where you’re doing business with somebody, you know, or maybe you’ve partnered with them for something or other. And then, you know, and then later you decide, you know, maybe, maybe we need to actually team up. Cathy Derksen So, I mean, we work well, together. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. Now, I know the other thing that sometimes trips people up and I know sometimes it’s tripped me up in the past as well, is the cost to participate. So. Because sometimes some of them can be quite pricey and I think depending on who’s running it, sometimes I think I’ve seen, because I’ve seen like some bigger name people, you know, offer this collaborative opportunity and they want a lot of money to participate. So how would you advise someone again on, you know, trying to, you know, I guess, you know, figure out what would be, you know, the ROI and how much should I really invest. What do you, what do you have to say about that? Cathy Derksen And there, I mean, there is definitely something to be said for a book where there is some big name person, like say if Jack Canfield’s name is actually attached to the book, obviously you’re going to get a lot more visibility in that community. With the last book that I just did that I mentioned, it was with the leadership global community that is a very active group of women in that community. So it was almost a given that all the women in that book now are, you know, riding that wave of that whole community. So there’s definitely something to be said for ones that do have, I guess, you’d call them a ringer that’s, you know, really kind of add that value. But in a lot of cases, I’d be really careful about what you’re paying for. I always do my best to keep my investments as low as possible, to keep it accessible to women in all sorts of different situations in their life. And so with mine, I’ve around 2,000, under 2,000. And that includes everything from coaching with your chapter right through to all of the professional editing, publishing, formatting, all of the Amazon work, all the marketing materials. So we do all of that and keep it around 2,000 or below. And so once that push up into 3,000, 5,000, 10,000, I would definitely be asking what exactly you’re getting from this. And they could be promising some bells and whistles, but look for the evidence of whether that has happened previously with other books that they’ve put out. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, definitely. And, and I think it is important. I know because again, sometimes I, I think I’ve. Well, I’ve deal with some of my clients and not only in the present, but in the past have been, are spiritual entrepreneurs. And sometimes they’re, you know, they’re real healers and, and, and sometimes they’re struggling to be able to be profitable in their business. And and so I know that sometimes that price can seem like a lot when you do factor in all of the different things that go into marketing a book. It’s, it is, it’s, it’s time consuming and there is a lot to go in it. So, so you really are getting your money’s worth and you need to think of it as a marketing tool. And so it’s a marketing expense. So, you know, factor into your marketing. Cathy Derksen Budget and consider that it could be tax deductible as a marketing expense. Gloria Grace Rand That’s right. Yeah, absolutely. Oh, I appreciate you mentioning that. That’s really a good point that we sometimes, sometimes don’t think about always. But yeah, I love that. So I’m gonna just switch gears on you, just a quick second here and ask you, ask you something else because I like asking my guests these questions. So what are you curious about right now? Cathy Derksen See, what am I curious about? I would say what I’ve become curious about lately has been travel. And I’ve actually started adding retreats, more retreats into what I do. So what’s kind of my curiosity lately has been where do I actually want to go? Let’s make a retreat and go there. And so that’s kind of what I’ve been curious about lately. I’ve Been listening to a lot of people that are traveling places and talking about different locations and thinking, oh, that sounds nice. We could go there too. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. So would this be a writer’s retreat then? Or would it be a. I’m actually playing. I need a break. I need a break from writing. I need a self care retreat and then I can go back and finish my chapter. Cathy Derksen But yeah, so they’ll actually be kind of a combination. So like I mentioned with one of my books, we did a billboard in Times Square last month and so we did a little mini retreat around that. And that’s definitely something we’ll be doing more of. And so we’ll be doing the billboard retreats. And the other one is I’m looking at doing some writing retreats as well with those. I’m playing around with the idea of would I only. Would I want everyone to be contributing to one of my books? So we’re coming together just to write that book. Gloria Grace Rand Right. Cathy Derksen Or would I have it that people can come together working on all kinds of different things that they’re writing, but coming together to support each other in our writing and learning about writing. So I’m kind of playing with those two models. Okay. And then the other side. Yes. I’m thinking of doing some retreats that are just for fun and getting together. And I mean, I always like to throw kind of that mastermind collaboration piece together where, you know, obviously you want the women in the group to get to know each other to you really make real connection with each other. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen But so I’ve. I put a stake in the ground that we’re going to New Zealand next year. That’s. That’s what I’m working on. Gloria Grace Rand Wow. Cathy Derksen 2026. Gloria Grace Rand All right. Sounds good. My goodness. All right. And. And I like all of those ideas I think, I think would be really work. Well, I could see either one. You probably just have to, you know, talk to your community and find out what they want. Cathy Derksen Exactly. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Is there anything else that I should have asked you about this process of publishing that I didn’t or any other last words of wisdom you want to leave our audience today? Cathy Derksen Well, I would. One of the things I often get with women when they’re thinking about joining the books is they. They think that their story’s not significant enough or important enough or different enough. And I just want to remind everyone that we all have a story that could help somebody else getting through similar challenges or overcoming a similar obstacle in their life. So don’t let yourself play that game of playing small and Thinking small and letting especially imposter syndrome as well get in the way of you stepping forward, raising your voice, standing with that community, and really understanding the value of your story. Gloria Grace Rand Agree 100 percent. Because it is so gratifying when someone does say, ah, I, I really, I really got what you had to say because I, you know, I’ve gone through something similar and I’ve had, you know, several people have, you know, told me that when they read my book. And it’s, it, it’s, it’s nice to know that, well, here’s the thing, too, is that we all think we’re, you know, we are all unique. And I do teach that, you know, to value your uniqueness. And at the same times, we’re also a lot similar, a lot more similar than we think. And we, we all have certain types of trauma that we go through and, and, you know, and they look different with, with everybody. But your reactions to it, I think, are. There can be a lot of similarities there. And people could say, oh, yeah, I felt that way too when this happened to me. It wasn’t the exact same thing, but I get it. Cathy Derksen Exactly. Exactly. And even one of the examples, too, that really touched my heart. Like I said, my first book was called Embrace Courage, and that was two years ago now that we released that one. And I got a message from one of the women that was in that book, and her friend had sent her a clip on social media. This friend was going through chemotherapy and had chosen that book to help her through it. And so the image she sent was her in the chemo chair with that book on her lap and saying how this has got her through this. And, you know, it. Even just talking about it, it, you know, makes me cry. Gloria Grace Rand I know. I’m, I’m, like, tearing up as well because, because I, I’m picturing my sister in the chemo chair and it’s like. Cathy Derksen Exactly. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Cathy Derksen I mean, our stories, like you said, whether it’s an exact story or a common thread or just, just that, that inspiration that you get from hearing about somebody else taking on a big challenge or overcoming a big obstacle, like, even if there’s nothing else in common, I think we just, we find that inspiration and that motivation from stories. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Oh, wonderful. I’m so glad I had you on today. I knew this was going to be. Be good because we, you know, we, we chatted a little while ago and I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes. You got to come on the show. So if someone does want to connect with you and maybe find out, you know when. When you’re launching your next book and maybe they want to get involved, what’s the best place for people to. To learn more about you? Cathy Derksen Yeah, so my website is inspired tenacity.com and as far as social media goes, LinkedIn is where I am most active. I’m in a couple other places, but I don’t spend much time there. So LinkedIn is definitely the best place to connect with me. And. And yes, and I always have more books coming along, so as some roll off and get published and other ones get started and. And I’m also developing new ideas all the time. So if you’ve got a specific theme that you think we should do a collaborative book on, then definitely let me know because we could develop that idea. Gloria Grace Rand I like that. All right. All right. Well, you heard it here, folks. If you’ve got an idea and definitely consider doing a collaborative book, especially, I think also what’s great about it, which we didn’t mention, but I think it does. Even if you do have that desire to write your own book, once you start writing chapters for these collaborative books, I think that also helps you to then give you that confidence of going, well, you know, maybe I could actually write my own book, because that’s what happened with me. I. I definitely was in collaborative books first before I tackled my own, so. Cathy Derksen Exactly, too. Gloria Grace Rand All right, well, thank you so much for being with us today. I really appreciate you spending some time and. And I know that our audience really receive some value from it today. Cathy Derksen Well, thank you very much for having me. We’ll have to do it again sometime. Gloria Grace Rand Absolutely. And I do want to thank you for watching and for listening today. And I hope that you will, you know, start taking action, jot down some ideas about what you want to. What do you want to. What’s your story about? Yeah, that’s what I want to say. And make sure that you are subscribed to the podcast, if you aren’t already. We’re on all the major platforms and you can subscribe on YouTube as well. And until next time, I always encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

Feel like unmatched business growth is out of reach? You might have an abundance wound – a deep-seated belief that you’re not worthy of financial prosperity. In this eye-opening episode, I explore the hidden barriers that can block your path to financial success and share powerful strategies to heal your relationship with money. Show Notes | Transcript “You’re doing not only yourself and your family and your business and your clients a disservice by not having money and by not being as successful as you’d like to be, then you’re also unable to then share that wealth in the world.” – Gloria Grace Rand As a recovering people-pleaser who’s faced my own money challenges, I know how difficult it can be to break free from limiting beliefs. You’ll hear about my own personal journey, including how childhood experiences and family attitudes shaped my view of wealth. And you’ll discover why even spiritual entrepreneurs sometimes struggle to reconcile their values with financial success. In this episode, you’ll learn: How to recognize the signs of an abundance wound in your life and business Why traditional gender roles and family dynamics can impact your financial mindset The surprising ways financial stress manifests in your body and emotions Practical techniques to rewrite your money story and create empowering new beliefs Key insights include: The importance of balancing giving and receiving in your business and personal life How life transitions like divorce or empty nesting can trigger abundance wounds Why raising your rates regularly is crucial for sustainable business growth The power of gratitude in attracting more financial abundance I also introduce you to the transformative practice of light language – a multidimensional form of communication that can help clear energetic blocks around money. You’ll experience a brief light language transmission designed to release old abundance wounds and open you to greater prosperity. Whether you’re struggling with undercharging, overgiving, or simply feeling stuck in your financial growth, this episode offers compassionate guidance and practical strategies. Tune in to start healing your abundance wound and create a more empowering relationship with money and success! Resources: Gain further insight from Mikelann Valterra’s episode: Harnessing Goddess Energy and Financial Empowerment for Women Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. What kind of money mindset do you have? Positive one that empowers women entrepreneurs to make smart decisions, set clear goals, and achieve sustainable growth. I hope so. However, if money isn’t quite flowing into your business or your life the way you’d like, it may be due to an abundance wound. So today we’re going to be examining the stories that can block financial success and help you heal that abundance wound. And we’re going to be talking about what it looks like. So in case you think you don’t have it, you may start to think otherwise. Possibly. I hope not. But first, as always, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time. Joining us, I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are, lead boldly, and shine their light in the world. So what the heck is an abundance wound anyway? Well, it is a deep seated belief that you’re not worthy of financial abundance. And it’s really rooted in this belief that there’s not enough or even more fundamentally, that I’m not enough. And I can relate to this one because I definitely, I definitely have had that come up in my life. I mean it definitely when I started, first started my business way back in 2009 and, and I wrote about this in my book Live Love Engage, that I discovered that I had a lot of like, limiting beliefs around money and, and in researching and you know, getting ready for this episode, also just sort of reminding myself of how that showed up for me. So let’s talk about that a little bit. So it can be financially, of course it can show up with patterns like compulsive spending or on the other side, excessive saving, maybe a fear of investing, you know, getting into the stock market, or it’s that constant sense of financial instability even when that’s not how your life actually is or maybe circumstances have improved. Maybe it was that way at one time, but not anymore. And there can also be some, emotionally, it can show up as feelings of shame or guilt or fear around money and abundance and it’s often triggered by early experiences or family attitudes. And again, I’ll, I’ll say for, from my experience growing up that my mom definitely had, was, was always feeling like we didn’t have enough and she would rely on her mom to be able to help her out, to help our family out financially. And even though both my mom and dad worked and, and they did, and, and this is even in the 70s and then not many, not as many women were in the workforce. So, you know, they were working full time. And. And as my beloved sister, who’s not with us anymore, used to. Used to needle me about. Is that you were. You were spoiled. Glor. I was like. And I realize now that, well, in a lot of ways, I mean, I did have some traumatic things in my childhood, but overall, I had dance lessons. In fact, my mom quit smoking to help pay for my dance lessons. I was in Girl Scouts. I had guitar lessons, I had organ lessons. So, you know, and then later on, my mom bought tickets to Broadway shows. We. We would have, you know, those, Those plans where you get, you know, what is the word? I can’t think of it like packet and whatever. A package of shows that we would go to. So we were middle class for sure. We weren’t. I mean, yes, during the. There was a recession in the 70s where we were eating a lot of Hamburger Helper, which I did not like, and we had to keep the thermostat turn down low in the winter. I grew up in Michigan because it was expensive to run the furnace, so we would have to, you know, layer up on clothes and put. We had. Luckily we had in. In one room of our house, we had a fireplace, so we would, you know, put a log in the fire and stay warm that way. But it’s still. There was a lot of this stuff that showed up. And so in particular for. For women, let’s say over 50, that a lot of times we might have internalized, you know, traditional gender roles, and that leads to. Can lead to guilt or hesitation around prioritizing their own ambitions, you know, whether it is working or. Or starting a business or, you know, spending family resources on their business, even if they’re financially secure. And they may also have to grieve the lack of support from previous generations, and they’re consciously going out and trying to choose new supportive communities. Now. Younger women, and I know sometimes we do have some younger women listening to this podcast, you may find that that abundance wound manifests as guilt over investing time and money in your business at the perceived expense of family needs. Or you might just, you know, again, as we get older, we do tend to be a little bit more financially secure. But when you’re younger, you know, you’re trying to pay for a house, you’re trying to raise kids, you know, there’s not as much necessarily disposable income, so you may tend to overwork in your business or, or again, you’re not feeling worthy and you might suffer from imposter syndrome. So there’s a lot, there’s a lot that can happen here that can really, you know, bring up these issues around money where, where we don’t feel like we have enough. And, and a lot of too is, you know, there’s a lot of common money stories that especially. And again, I think I’m hoping. I know, I tried with my kids, I think, not to repeat these stories, hopefully, and they’re doing pretty well. So I think, I think we’re okay. But I know for, let’s say, baby boomers in particular, and maybe Gen X possibly, I forget which generation came after, I guess Gen X. But you might have heard things like money doesn’t grow on trees or you got to work hard for every penny. In fact, there’s a lovely, you know, there was the old Huey Lewis and the new song. You know, you work hard for the money. So hard for the money. You know, we hear these things. It comes through. Oh, and in fact, even I’m thinking about it, it’s not even from. We hear money stories in our culture. It’s not even just even in our family, but you’ll hear story, you know, songs, TV shows, you know, all kinds of stuff. Now, I know that I think a lot of people who listen to this podcast or watch it on YouTube are also probably spiritual, Spiritual entrepreneurs. And so there’s a lot of. There’s some limiting beliefs around that too. You know, stories like spiritual people shouldn’t care about money where it’s not spiritual to make a lot of money. And that’s why a lot of spiritual entrepreneurs struggle, frankly, because they, they want to be able to just give their services away and not be compensated enough, you know, or. Or it’s selfish to want more when others have less. That. That goes along also with that spiritual thinking or even for older, you know, folks, I’m, I’m. I’m too old to start over financially. Get that one out right now. You’re never too old to start over. Oh, my gosh, that’s ridiculous. But anyway, I want to mention right now that I would encourage you to go back and whether you’re watching this on YouTube, go back and check previous episodes, or if you’re listening to this on Apple or something. A few weeks ago, I had a wonderful interview with Michael Ann Volterra, and she’s also deals with money, and she talked about a concept called noble poverty. Noble poverty. And so we, we both agree that money is energy or form of energy. But I, I want to share this with you, but then also go back in and re. Watch that episode, listen to that episode because there’s of a lot, a lot of good information in there. But I’m gonna, I’m, I’m focusing today on, on this abundance wound and how to heal it. But she, we went into, we covered a lot of stuff, but anyway, she says that, you know, when we constantly give without receiving, it creates an imbalance. And she said that she likes to think of it as a receiving valve and sometimes it gets stuck and we become over givers. But being an over giver isn’t healthy because this is, you know, this is what can lead to burnout and self sacrifice or even martyrdom. And we wouldn’t want our loved ones to live that way. So why are we accepting it for ourselves, for heaven’s sakes? So it often comes down to whether or not we truly believe we deserve to receive. And so again, this ties into those deeper issues of self worth, which is not the same as net worth, which is your money. So, but it is just important. So again, I really encourage you to check out that episode because this, yeah, this concept of noble poverty. And like I said, I mean, I know I’ve, I’ve had to get over it myself and, and one thing I want to talk about actually too is the fact that we really do need to get over this, especially for spiritual entrepreneurs. But actually anybody who has this abundance wound, because you’re doing not only yourself and your family and your business and your clients a disservice by not having money and by not being as successful as you’d like to be, then you’re also unable to then share that wealth in the world. Because again, I know I’m, I’m quite confident that if you’re listening to this podcast, that you are a heart centered person, whether you’re a spiritual entrepreneur or not. You’ve got a big heart, I’m sure of it. And the more money you make, the more money you can invest and, you know, the more money that you can make, then guess what? The more money you have to give away to donate to your favorite nonprofit organization to share that wealth to be able to then maybe help out some clients who are financially challenged themselves, let’s say, because sometimes, and I was working with a coach one time who, you know, a lot of coaches will say that, well, yeah, you got to charge a lot of money for your services. You know, don’t be afraid of that because it really does help to. What’s the word? I want to Say, really perceive you more as an expert and. As opposed to, you know, and as someone. What do I want to say who, who really knows their stuff. Yeah, well, what. That’s kind of what an expert is, isn’t it? Yeah. Okay. Anyway, well, you’re. You’re perceived as higher quality. Yeah. You know, you know, you’re the Nordstrom of the world as opposed to Walmart or the dollar. And where was I going with this point? And I just lost my train of thought, but it will come back to me. Okay, Okay. I remember now the point I was trying to make. I was working with a coach one time and, and he. I know a lot of people, as I said, you know, a lot of people say, well, you got it, you know, charge, you know, really, do not be afraid, let’s put it that way. Don’t be afraid to raise your rates regularly. Don’t be afraid to charge a higher premium for your services. And I had a coach who also said that he, yes, he believed in that. And he also would allow himself to use his intuition and to not necessarily have fixed prices for everybody. So if he was, let’s say, doing a discovery call with someone and he really felt that he could help them, but they were, they were really in a position to not pay the full price that he, you know, for his services, then he would make an exception. And so it is okay to do that. You just don’t want to start the bar so low. So you want to be able to have some flexibility in your pricing of your services. And definitely don’t be afraid to stretch yourself a little bit in what you’re charging because it should make you feel a little bit uncomfortable. Not too much, you don’t want to go crazy, but a little bit uncomfortable and see how things go. And so, for instance, if you’ve been charging a certain price for a long time, and again, this is something that I cover in my book where I talked about when I first started my business. I was doing copywriting and I had a lovely client who I was writing blog articles for. And I worked for her for years. Quite a. Quite a while. Quite a long while. And she was very happy, and she was very happy with my work. That’s why she continued to hire me every, you know, every year. But it took me about three years before I finally, after listening to another webinar and, and hearing that, oh, I should be raising my rates. Oh, duh. So I finally said, yeah, I’ve gotta. I gotta put in a price increase. And they’re like, oh, okay. And I’m like, so raise your rates every year. You know, other companies do. Doesn’t have to be a lot. Maybe you raise it 5% or something or maybe even just 2%, whatever. But don’t be afraid to raise your rates. Okay, let’s talk a little bit more about now. In particular, how or what can happen, especially for if you’re a little bit older out there. You know, let’s say you’re a woman entrepreneur, you’re over 50 and you’re listening to this podcast. There are some things that happen as we get older in our lives that can maybe, maybe you’ve been fine with your money story. You know, you’ve had, you’ve had a great money story up until something happens. And those things can be things like now you’re an empty nester and you’re not sure what to do with yourself now. You know, you’ve been this great mom and now your kids have flown the coop and they don’t need you quite as much. They still need you. Your adult kids still need you. Don’t, don’t ever, don’t ever doubt that. And they don’t need you quite as much. So, so you have to kind of figure out, okay, well, what do I want to do now in this next chapter of my life? Sometimes you go through things like a divorce or separation or, you know, possibly even losing a spouse to death. And so that is gonna, that can shake things up. Maybe, you know, if you’ve been, if you have been in the corporate world for a long time and now your position is no longer needed, you know, they like to, I like to make cutbacks. In fact, there’s been a lot of that over the last few years. A lot of layoffs or you’re concerned about retirement. Do I really have enough money to survive? And let’s face it, we’re, you know, we live a lot longer. Even though I know there’s been some talk about the, the, our longevity, especially here in the United States, is not quite as good as it used to be, but we’re still, you know, the traditional retirement age used to be 65, but most women in particular are going to live to live until their 80s, maybe 90s. And so you need to make sure that you’ve got income to be able to sustain that. So that can help it. That can affect, you know, kind of bring up this abundance wound again because now you’re really, you know, focusing in on money and, you know, health scares can reshape your priorities. Maybe you’re caging caring for aging parents while you’re still perhaps supporting your adult kids some way. So all these things, like I said, if you, if you haven’t experienced issues with money in the past, these things sometimes can bring them up. So I just want you to be aware of them and I want you to be aware of how not only this shows up, let’s say, in your business, as we talked about earlier, can also show up in your body. Our bodies can hold on to these money stories and it can create some financial, well, financial stress can then affect your body and, or if you’re working too hard or things like this, it can really affect you and it can show up as, you know, your chest tightening or you’ve got tension headaches or you’ve got digestive issues. So it’s important to be aware of physical symptoms. And especially if, let’s say, you’ve been going, going around, going on, carrying on in your life and all of a sudden you start having issues like this, some sort of physical symptoms. So I encourage you to, before rushing to the doctor or even rushing to get a pill or something, is to stop and get quiet for a little bit and talk to your body and say, hey, what are you trying to tell me here? And you could spend some time meditating on it, you could journal about it. But I really, really encourage you to look within first before you look without. Now, of course, if you’ve got a splitting headache, go ahead, reach for Excedrin, but if it starts to become a pattern, I am, you know, you do want to go see a doctor. So also, and, but also look at the, look at what, what’s going on with you emotionally because it could be that your emotions are what is triggering this. And so I, well, what was I going to say? Yeah, I encourage you to. And I know there’s some people out there who are firmly, 100% are good with the Western medicine system and fine, you know, you can definitely go there and get help, get some of these symptoms treated. But Western medicine is really good at treating symptoms, not necessarily getting to the underlying cause. So once you’ve got your symptoms handled, yeah, that’s what I want to tell you. Get your symptoms handled, get them under control and then, yeah, then you can start looking into, okay, what is going on? Have I changed my eating habits? Are my sleeping habits different? And if so, why? Am I working long hours? Am I staying up on the computer until midnight every night instead of stopping at like 9 o’ clock at night and then maybe just reading for an hour? Or two, what’s going on in my business, what’s going on with my personal life. Look at that. And then when you can do this. And again, I love journaling is a great, great way to come to terms with this. And, and, and what I would recommend you do is just, you know, as, as I said is like just say, okay, body, what are you trying to tell me? What. And, and just keep writing, you know, that, you know, or higher self, what do you. What is going on with my body? Why am I suddenly having these symptoms? What could possibly be going on in my life that is causing this? And I’m telling you, even if you don’t know what to say. And it’s like, I don’t understand. I don’t know why I’m having these symptoms. It’s very frustrating. I just, I don’t like feeling this way and I really would like to be able to fix it. And I wonder if, oh, and then all of a sudden an idea will come to you and you’ll be like, oh, maybe it’s because that, that client that I had for so many years suddenly said, I can’t, I can’t work with you anymore. And that could be a shock to the system. And you can be like, and you can, and you could be in fact grieving that. And that’s okay to grieve that. So it’s, it’s allowing yourself to be aware of these things. So those are great ways to do that and, and talk kindly to yourself and, and, and soothe yourself. And it’s, you know, you are your best friend. You know, the only person who truly, truly knows you the best is you. So get to know yourself. I’m gonna say spend time writing, thinking, even, even just sitting and being quiet. You know, not necessarily even meditating, but just sit in a chair and look outside, you know, window for a little bit and just allow yourself time to breathe. Breathing, Breathing is another good thing too. There’s, there’s, you know, different breathing modalities and things. You can Google them and find out things to do or work with a certified breathwork practitioner. I know that I have, I have a friend who does that. And so there’s, there’s people out there who can help you with that. That might be a good way to help you to release some of the finance, the stress and, and to heal these money wounds and, and so enter. Energetic treatments are really great. You know, things like even. Things like acupuncture or EFT tapping, you know, where you’re tapping on different parts of your body. And I’m. I know it works great. For some reason it doesn’t resonate with me. The other things that I’ve talked about, meditation and journaling are things that really resonate with me as well as something that I do, I’ve been doing for the last five years now, which is channeling light language. And that has made a huge difference in my life as well as my clients of being able to release old stories, release energetic blocks around money that are keeping, keeping me stuck, keeping, keeping others stuck. So I thought what I do right now before I. I’m going to give you some other, other suggestions on how to manage this abundance wound as well in a moment. But about what I do right now is take a little break and share with you light language, especially if you have never experienced it before. So let me give you a little bit. I’ll just give you a little the what’s the word? Cheat. Cheat sheet version of what light language is. It’s, it’s essentially, it’s a, it’s a multi dimensional form of human communication if I can communicate well. So it’s a multi dimensional form of communication. It’s essentially, it is a language of, of love. And it is something that like I say comes from other dimensions. Some. If you go to like YouTube and search for like light language, you’ll see a lot of different people do it and they will say that it comes from, you know, galactic beings like Pleiadians or Arcturians or angels. And I know for me, I don’t know exactly where it comes from. I do know that I do feel that sometimes it is a very angelic thing. Sometimes it’s also ancestral and because some of the way that the, what I do is I will speak, speak it or sing it or both depending. And it’s, it’s a language that your left side of the brain, the logical brain is probably not going to be able to translate. I would say, I would say 99.9% of the time it’s not, you’re not going to be able to understand it. However, if you are really tuned into your right side of the brain that more that the feminine side, the more intuitive side, that’s the word I’m looking for, then you might be able to understand what I share with you. Either way, the important thing is that the language is something that speaks to your heart and your soul and, and, and it’s a, it’s a frequency. You know, anytime we speak, I’m, I’m the words I’m speaking to you right now carry a frequency. And so when I channel light language that is carrying a frequency and that’s what is healing about it. So I encourage you right now to, if you’re listening to this somewhere where you are driving a car, to pause the podcast and come back to it a little bit or speed past it and then, and then like I said, to listen to the rest and then come back to this later. Because what I would encourage you to do is to listen with an open heart and an open mind and possibly close your eyes. So that’s why I don’t want you driving a car while you’re listening to this because it’s also, whenever I’ve, I’ve done this with clients, they, they find it very relaxing. And so I don’t want you to be too relaxed while you’re driving, when you’re operating machinery. Okay. Or if you’re on the treadmill or something. So do this later, come back to this later. So what I will encourage you to do and what I do always is I am encouraging and asking that the message that comes through will help to release any old abundance wounds you have and to be. For the message you receive is going to be for your soul’s highest good and the highest good of all concerned. So that’s, that’s my process and, and I encourage you to now just get your feet on the floor, get a little grounded. Close your eyes if you want. You don’t have to, but if you want. I, I find it helps. I, I often close my eyes when I’m channeling just because again it helps me to be more in tune with, with the messaging. But just, yeah, so you know, close your eyes, take a deep breath, let it out and just, yeah. Set an intention for yourself that whatever you hear is going to be for your soul’s highest good and will help you to release whatever needs to be released today. I hope that resonated with you today. And if you would be interested in having a private session with me, you’re certainly welcome to do that because then I love working one on one with folks because then we are able to really deal with whatever your specific issue is. So you can schedule a light language session with me and if you go to bit ly, capital L, capital L, capital E lowercase podcast and then the number 30, you can schedule a 30 minute session with me and I will have that, I’ll have that in the show notes as well. So what else can we do about this? These money stories that don’t Serve us. Well, I’ll tell you one other thing that I’ve learned how to do. And again, I. I learned this from another coach who is a. A money coach. And. And she’s. She specializes. There’s the word man. Trying to. Trying to pull these words out of my brain today. A little challenging. That’s okay. So you can rewrite your money story. Yep, yep. You can. You don’t have to say that. This is my story, and I’m sticking with it. And this is, you know, I just. Whatever. I have to deal with it. No, no, because guess what? Our brains are. We have, like, neural neuroplasticity of is. It is. Our brains are. And. And so we can rewire them with empowering stories. So what I learned how to do, and in fact, I share this in my book as well, is you can, you know, write down whatever your disempowering story is, and then you can then say, okay, well, all right, so that’s. That’s what happened. What would happen if I didn’t have that story? How would my life have been different? And then use that wonderful brain that you have, that especially the right side, that creative side, to just use your imagination and dream up what would be this wonderful outcome instead of what I did experience in the past. So let’s say for me, I’ll give you an example. So again, I had these stories of. Well, one of. One of the. One of the ones that was a bit disempowering for me in my business was that my mom really didn’t like rich people. And especially she had a brother who was an entrepreneur, and she thought he was a crook. So I grew up hearing this. And so then when I became an entrepreneur, I have this sort of war going on in my head because, you know, I want to be able to be successful. And yet at the same time, well, you know, if you get rich, then, you know, I don’t want to be a crook. I want to be a good. You know, I want to be a good person. I want to be generous. So I could instead say, my mom was so proud of her brother and that he was so generous as an entrepreneur, and she, you know, loved that he was. That he was just very successful. He gave back to his community, and he treated his employees well. And so instead I could say, well, those. Yeah, that’s. That’s how I grew up instead, hearing all these wonderful stories about entrepreneurs and how generous they can be, and then just say, okay, that’s my story. That’s my story. And I’M sticking to it, doggone it. So try that and see how that plays for you. And, and if you need to, then read that story every day for maybe three weeks or so, or at least a week to be able to get it into your brain and really start saying, yes, this is my story. I am a generous person. I am a successful, I am a profitable business owner. I have plenty of money to be able to do good things with in the world. And more is coming to me every day. Now I will say, you notice how I was a bit amped up there when I was talking about it and smiling. For those of you who are watching me on YouTube, I hope you noticed I was smiling. Emotion is a big part of this. So make sure that affirmations that are just, you know, if you’re reading it like that, yeah, I’m successful, I make a lot of money. Your brain does isn’t going to buy that at all. No, no, no way. You’ve got to use emotion. You’ve got to really feel it, believe it, feel it. Oh, I even have a, I have a shirt that says that. Something like see it, feel it, believe it. So I should have worn that for today. Darn it. Oh, well, it’s okay. Oh, and one other thing. Cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Be grateful for however much money you have right now. Be grateful that you can put food on the table. Be grateful that, let’s say that you have employees and that you can pay your employees. Be grateful for your clients. Be grateful for the money you have in your bank. Be grateful. Be grateful. Because oh my gosh, the more that you are grateful, the more you have to be grateful for. It’s, it’s the law of attraction. It’s just reciprocity. I don’t know, but I’m telling you, gratitude goes a long way and I am so grateful for you for listening and for watching today. And I hope that you are subscribed to the podcast on your favorite platform like Apple or Spotify and that or YouTube as well. And I encourage you so if you, if you aren’t already to please subscribe on whatever platform you are on at the moment. But because next week I have another interview so this time it is going to be with speaker and 18 times number one best selling author Cathy Dirksen. And she is going to be talking about how collaborative books can help you expand your network, build your business and increase your visibility while becoming an international best selling author. And you know, I published my own book but I also have been in a couple different collaborative books over the years. So one of them is called Conceived to Lead, and I’ve got a chapter in here. I forget what it was called. There was something about, oh, there it is. I turned right to it. It’s called Reluctant Leader, no More author Gloria Grace Rand right there. And then I was also in this one called Unscripted How Entrepreneurs Leap and Find Success. Real Life Advice from Entrepreneurs Making It Happen. And I don’t remember what my story was mine. It was something about can’t find that chapter now. Oh, well, that’s okay. Anyway, I know I’m in here, though. I know I’m in here. But anyway, these are great. Being in a collaborative book is really great because you do. You get to become a number one bestseller and hopefully the person who’s doing, who’s doing this knows what they’re doing, can tell you about it. And it’s not as intimidating to write one chapter as it is to write a whole book. So it’s a good way to get your feet wet. And these are also great as number one. It is a, you know, it establishes you as an, as an expert. You can use it as a business card, frankly, you can give it away to clients or you can sell them. But we’re going to talk more about that, all that next week. So I hope you will tune in for that. And I think that’s going to do it for this week. So until next time, as always. Well, for those of you who’ve watched the show or listened to us, listen to the podcast for a while, know I like to end it by encouraging you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

Imagine if you were to experience true liberation from living behind a mask, so that you were finally able to speak your truth and fully embrace who you are. How would you feel?  Show Notes | Transcript “The armor in which you continue to place on your own being becomes that much more stifling to the true essence that we were brought into this earth of perfection in our imperfection.” – Michelle Bishop In this heartfelt episode, I sit down with Michelle Bishop, a certified life coach and author of “Choose You First,” to explore the transformative power of self-love and authenticity. Michelle shares her inspiring journey from silent struggles to empowering others, reminding us that our stories – even the messy parts – can be exactly what someone else needs to hear. Discover how to: How to break free from self-doubt and reclaim your life after adversity The importance of embracing your authentic self and shedding limiting beliefs Why choosing yourself first is crucial for personal growth and healthy relationships Practical strategies for building inner resilience and creating a life filled with joy and purpose Key insights include: The impact of childhood experiences on our ability to speak up and express ourselves How vulnerability and authenticity can lead to deeper, more fulfilling relationships The difference between self-care and true self-love Why small, attainable goals are essential for lasting personal transformation Michelle also shares her personal story of overcoming grief, rediscovering her identity, and achieving remarkable physical and emotional healing. Her journey serves as a powerful reminder that it’s never too late to choose yourself and create the life you desire. Whether you’re struggling with self-doubt, seeking to build stronger relationships, or simply looking to live more authentically, this conversation offers valuable insights and practical strategies to help you embrace your true self and thrive. Tune in to start your journey towards self-love and personal empowerment! Connect with Michelle Website: Bishoplife.com Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Gloria Grace Rand Namaste. Are you ready to meet someone who transformed her silent struggles into a powerful mission of inspiring others? Well, I hope so, because I am about to dive into a heart to heart conversation about breaking free from self doubt and finding the courage to share your truth. And I believe it’s a journey that’s going to remind you that your story, even the messy parts, could be exactly what someone else needs to hear. But first, I do want to welcome you to live Love Engage. Especially if this is your first time finding us and listening or watching, if you happen to be watching on YouTube. I am Gloria Grace, the founder of Align to Shine Academy and I work with spiritually minded women entrepreneurs to break free from self doubt and step into their highest potential. And that’s why I really love our guests today because we are so aligned. Her name is Michelle Bishop and she is a certified life coach and author of the book choose you first. And she helps women reclaim their lives after adversity by embracing self love and building inner resilience. Again, two of my favorite subjects. And through coaching, workshops and speaking, Michelle empowers clients to shed limiting beliefs, strengthen self worth and create lives filled with joy and purpose. And I swear we must have the same website. I, I swear it, it is cracking me up so much because we’re just like simpatico here. So I want to welcome you officially, Michelle, to Live Love Engage. Michelle Bishop Thank you, Grace, I really appreciate it. Gloria Grace Rand Oh well, I, I, I just love that you are on this mission to help women love themselves. And I, I know why it’s important to me. But I’d love for you to share with our audience what, why is it important to you? Michelle Bishop What I have finally come to the understanding is that no one can feel your love but yourself. And people ask me, you know, why now? And I was like, well, it took almost 59 years to get here and a lot of life experience and through adversities, recognizing that no one can truly complete you unless you’re complete yourself within. Gloria Grace Rand I can relate to that so much through personal experience as well. So, so tell us a little bit about your journey because I know part of it was, was you, you are not able, you weren’t able to like speak up. I think for yourself as part, part of that. And so, so how did you wind up sort of reclaiming your life? Michelle Bishop When you say unable to speak up, that’s accurate. The title of my book is choose you first. As adults, we have the opportunity to choose the decisions and our actions throughout life. But as a child, you have truly no choice. And so when you live in adversity abuse, you learn that as being your normal as opposed to when you might be wanting to speak out, then you’re actually pushed down even further into that traps of emotional, possibly mental as well as physical abuse. And, and so you always lean towards taking the least path of resistance so you stay quiet in it. And it becomes a life pattern in so much that you do. And it often creates continued layers of mask that occur throughout the stages of, you know, infancy to even toddler to young, child to child to teenage to young adults, and then, you know, raising children, business. And as those masks continue and you do not speak up, you’re thinking everybody, you’re, you’re doing for everyone else. But in turn the armor in which you continue to place on your own being becomes that much more stifling to the true essence that we were brought into this earth of perfection in our imperfection. Gloria Grace Rand Oh yeah, yeah, I, I definitely, like I said I could, I can relate to that as well because for me growing up it, I really kind of quickly learned it was better to just, you know, try to be not exactly invisible, but to just, you know, kind of like, okay, I want to make sure that I don’t provoke, you know, my mom in particular and, and so let me just kind of, you know, try to be quiet and, and that, and not speak up. And yet I do know, and I might ask you, ask you about this if you found this, is that when I was away from my family, I was able to be much more of myself and could. And even in school I found myself in opportunities where I did speak up. Not all the time because I also got bullied in middle school, as I think a lot of people do, but I think especially in high school as I’m getting older. So did you find that, could you find it a little bit easier maybe outside of the family dynamic sometime to be able to speak up a little bit more? Michelle Bishop That’s a great question. And I was I guess born very, very filled with love and with a sweet soul and kind. And so in that I really chose not to make a lot of waves. So if that was, I went to a very small private school went which was a great experience because it was a safe environment. But those days are very different back then than they are now. So even back then, if there was any type of questioning, it didn’t occur because you didn’t speak about it. But I really internalized my own self being by creating my own world of wonderment. I, I enjoyed times that were Quiet that I was in nature, or I would see a flower even. I don’t know if you remember those. I think they call them dandelions. Like, you blow those. Yeah, you blow them as a child and just see all this, like, so, you know, it was more of a. Those were more my safe havens because I always felt like I was on the stage or had to act a certain way. My parents, well, my mother actually worked at the school as well, so that made it a lot more difficult. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, that’s true. I could. I could definitely see that. And yeah, I, I, I think my refuge was books. I was always reading. So that way, you know, wherever, you know, in school, at home, what have you. Michelle Bishop So isn’t that interesting how we find our own little outlets? Gloria Grace Rand Absolutely. So what made the difference? What, what shifted for you? You finally decide to actually choose you, you yourself, first? Michelle Bishop Like I said, that is a long time coming. Actually, the deciding factor was ultimately when I was vulnerable, authentic and real. It was with the love of my life. I had met my husband, actually, in 1995, and we. He was in a marriage. I was getting ready to be married, and then was married and had two beautiful children. So we kind of drifted away. And then back in 2003, amazingly enough, when my mother had passed away, who was my abuser, I had run into him on one of the busiest days in our area, because it was fall and it’s beautiful in the Smoky Mountains. And had. He thought I’d moved back to Florida. And we reconnected and ended up getting married. And I. Before we started our relationship, I’d said, do you want to know me? The real me, not the business person, not the. The mother, not the friend, not all these little channels I put myself in, but all of me. And he’s like, absolutely. And so I was completely honest, completely vulnerable, and truly had first experienced love in its full entirety in our relationship. And then in 2019, he had a tragic accident and died. He was in a drowning accident, fell off of a yacht that. On. Off a business trip that I happened to not be with him, and drowned. And that was completely unexpected. And I had put everything into him. So when he passed away, it really took me to my core, to the point that I couldn’t breathe. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, yeah. Michelle Bishop I couldn’t. No breath. I, I just didn’t. I mean, even talking about it to this day, as people that lose people that they love so much, I mean, it really. I actually use breathing as a technique in my own life. It’s been very, very useful as A practice. And there’s a lot of wonderful benefits that occur from that. But after struggling over the last five years, I recognize that that’s not what God wanted for us. And I’m not that. That’s my belief. I am respectful and welcoming of everyone’s belief of spirituality, no matter what it is. But for me, I knew that I needed to be whole and I needed to choose me first. I had to fix all the brokenness that had come with that path and not expect someone else to just fix me because I had to choose me first. So that’s how it came about. Gloria Grace Rand Wow. Well, first, I’m so sorry for your loss and. And that. Yeah, I can. I can only imagine. I. I mean, I have. I’ve not lost a spouse, but, you know, I have lost a sister, but it’s still different and. And especially from, you know, because this was a much more intimate relationship that you had. And. But I guess it’s, you know, more life lessons we have to learn. Right. Michelle Bishop Isn’t that true, though? And shape who I am today. And I recognize I would not have had the opportunity to share and be vulnerable and authentic as the real me with everyone else. And it’s so freeing. And if. If I can coach and lead and speak and shine a light of hope to people around the world, of that it’s a moment. You will get through it. You just have to believe in yourself and also rely on the resources that you have available to you. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Michelle Bishop And a lot of people are not aware of that. So as much as I can speak the message, I want to. Gloria Grace Rand Very good. Well, I love that. So you. You. One of the things that I. I mentioned in. In your bio is that you. You do help. I think I mentioned this, that you help. You help your clients, you know, to shed limiting beliefs. So what’s. What’s one belief that you had to overcome yourself and that maybe now you are also helping your clients with. Michelle Bishop That. I was never enough. I hear that so often. And it’s such. It truly is such a sadness because I know with all of my being that we are all enough, even in our imperfections, knowing that you have to believe that in yourself. So what are those things that are holding you back? What are those rackets in the story that you’ve told yourself for all these many years? And how can we free those anchors so that you can fly the way that you should and know that you are absolutely 100% enough? And then more. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Yeah, I. I second that. Absolutely. Because we are. And again, this now this is my belief is that, you know, we are created in, in God’s image and certainly. And we’re really even part of it. Not, not even just created, but we’re like part of God. So if you believe, you know, whatever your beliefs are, but if you believe that God is, you know, omnipotent and, you know, and omniscient and all this, well, then we’ve got some of that too. And we are powerful creators and we can create the life we want. And, and it is about recognizing that, yeah, we’re not just enough or more than enough, frankly. So, so what would you say to someone? How, how, how would you like, give them maybe like one, one, one strategy or one tip to be able to start to something that they could do, to start reframing that and to really be able to start leaning into. Well. Michelle Bishop That’s, I think that it’s important to make very small pivots. Don’t jump in to like the deep end and expect. I, I really dislike when people will say, I can fix that and you’re gonna be okay. And I, I have the exact formula. We are all unique individuals. And so anybody that promises that they’ve got the answer, I would question that because the only one that has the answer is you. So when you make a small pivot by even taking a moment, whether or not you are an audio, a visual writing, do one thing, let’s just start out a week. Do something, recognize something that you did well and appreciate that within yourself. I often like to put things down in writing where, there. And I will do it in the morning where I wake up in the morning for something that I’m grateful for. I’m very goal oriented and what I’d like to achieve. And then at the end of the day, I kind of like to go back and recap and say, oh, wasn’t this great about today? And then it’s interesting because as children, often the first thing you hear about is diary. You know, you put all your little secrets in your diary. And it used to, when I was born, they used to have a little lock and yes, all the secrets up. I say keep it unlocked, be joyful in it and you know, just make a, make a move, make one move. Don’t try to say, I’m going to do this every single day. Make a attainable goal of difference and your goal is different than my goal and, and be respectful of that for yourself. Give yourself that grace. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, yeah, absolutely. I 100% agree with that. And especially about the baby steps and I love. And I love that, you know, point that you made, too, about if someone says that, you know, they’ve got the solution, it’s like, well, maybe. But that doesn’t necessarily still mean it’s going to be right for you because as you said, we are all different and we all react in different ways and we all have. We all come with our own stuff. And so we’re going to have to unpack that a little bit. Michelle Bishop Grace, isn’t that wonderful, though, in our own uniqueness? Just. Just recognizing that. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Michelle Bishop There is not a. Now, I’m not saying that people don’t offer great resources and. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, yeah. Michelle Bishop But as you said, to unpack what works for someone may not work for another. And so to be engaged with others of like mine in a safe environment is always important. And sometimes that safe environment is just within yourself. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, that’s true. Michelle Bishop And that’s just one step, you know, just one step and then take that chance. Gloria Grace Rand Right. Michelle Bishop This may not happen. You know, you might meet a person, you might meet a friend, you might go to a coach, a therapist, just make a choice for you that works for you with no judgment, right? Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. Because you may have to try different things and you may have to work with different people. And. And the other point is that you might find success with one person and. And you are able to do stuff, and then life happens and then you realize that, oh, darn, I thought I have this handled, and I don’t. And then you might have to go find somebody else and pivot to some. Somebody else. And we are constantly on a journey, a growth journey, and we’re always unpacking things. And so that’s why you do have to. And one other thing you mentioned, I loved about writing down. Writing down things important. And I know we have a lot of entrepreneurs, I think, who watch the show. And so that’s why I always encourage my clients, if you’re a business owner, to keep track of those testimonials and maybe put them in not only maybe on your website or wherever, but also maybe keep them in a journal so that when you have. Have those days, because we all have them where we do feel a little, you know, down in the dumps or we’re doubting ourselves a little bit, then you can go back and read and go, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that’s right. I did help them with that. Oh, yeah, they. They were really happy with that. Oh, cool. Well, I am all right, aren’t I? Michelle Bishop I know, Seriously. And it’s funny that you say that. Because we are all flawed as well. And, and that’s, that’s, that’s great as well. I mean it’s so in that in those moments of doubt to have affirmations that are from others, it is really a positive thing in encouraging you to just make that next step and journey of being the best you can be. And that’s what I say. Live your best you. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. Because it is different from everybody else’s. So I want to ask you about this because I know I’ve run into this and there’s even like articles about this thing. So how do you help your clients distinguish between self love and what a lot of times societies just deem self care. Michelle Bishop Very interesting about that. Sometimes in self love you can do all the care outside that you want to do and it could be healthy things for you, it could be good things for you, but that is just not anything like self love. When you take the moments inside yourself and take a breath in, in. And take that energy in and recognize the good in what you’re doing for yourself, for others, in the moment, for the earth, whatever that may be. Those are things nurturing your self love. Because all the self care is important because without our health, mental and physical, we have nothing. So those things of self care are very important, but they’re only what I would consider basically conduits to really what is important, which I think is in the heart and within the soul of energy of self love. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, yeah. It’s. It’s like self care is something you do, but. But self love is. It is still something you do, but it’s almost more of a state of being. It’s being exactly recognized. Yeah, yeah. So cool talking, talking about self love. But is there a maybe a commonly held belief about self love that you disagree with? Michelle Bishop Oh yes, there is. Gloria Grace Rand Do tell. Michelle Bishop It’s kind of like the. The name of my book is choose you first and that that thought process of self love, it’s interesting because it often can be considered selfish and people really have to recognize that that selfishness is once again part of a being, not self love. They are two different things and one is very different from the other. And I find that people feel as if they’re taking time out to choosing them first to living their best. You that it can be misconstrued right off the bat because of our society and preconceived thought processes often driven by media or other individuals that have nothing to do with you as a person. That it is selfish and it is far from Selfish. Because if you don’t take care of you in that self love, then it makes it impossible to give all of what you can to the people that you love most. And that is your family, your friends, your children, your spouse, the world. And so, so those are things that I really disagree with. And, and I hear often how, well that’s selfish. And I’m like, is it. Let’s, let’s unpack that. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, exactly. And, and I still trying to remember where I heard this first. It might have been from Esther Hicks and Abraham that I, I think when they talked about how when someone accuses you of self of being selfish, it’s because you’re not doing what they want you to do, which really means that they’re the ones being selfish, aren’t they? True. Michelle Bishop I love that. Well, and, and there’s. It is even more than being potentially selfish themselves, it. It can lead itself to a lot of other negative patterns of manipulation as well as controlling and narcissistic behaviors and bad codependent relationships. So there’s a string of things that go along with that. But again, it’s so important that we work on ourselves and are solid within that, that we can nurture and recognize those red flags. Because I lived a lifetime with the red flags flowing at me. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, I know. Michelle Bishop I mean, it came at me always. So I mean, it just, it’s. I’m a very different person and I’m truly who I was meant to be, as our creator did in the very, very beginning at this time in my life. And I’m so grateful. I mean, beyond grateful or for the people that I get to engage with. I learn every day from, from other people. And so just by sharing and being open and taking the light out of the closet and say, why aren’t we talking about this? How is that fixing that problem? We’re all human. We all have issues. They’re different issues. I may have been through a few more than others. Gives me more of a forum to talk about. Gloria Grace Rand Oh yeah, absolutely. What would you say has been. Or maybe, maybe even what was sort of the first. We’ll do it this way. How about what was like the first benefit that you really recognized once you were able to start truly loving yourself and choosing yourself first? Michelle Bishop If you remember, the first benefit truly was to not feel lost. I. I mean, it’s just amazing living a life lost and to have found myself. That was the first benefit and how easy it was that and that. And it’s a huge benefit in a very small period of time. I Mean, it’s like, oh, wow, how easy is this? It’s like, this is who I am. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, well, you know, I’m. I’m thinking, though, someone is. Might be listening to this going, well, how do I know I’m lost, though? You know, it’s like, what. What does that look like? Because I. Because I’m just thinking, I know, I know, and I can relate to it. But. But maybe for someone out there who may not even realize yet that they’re experiencing that. Michelle Bishop That’s a great question. I think that a lot of people don’t recognize that they’re lost because our lives are so busy and they’re packed and we fill them with activity and doing for others. It happens all the time. But I think you’ll recognize being lost in feelings of anxiousness, having anxiety, feeling anger, feeling sadness, feeling overwhelmed, doubt, questioning, continually questioning in the moment, just where you’re at, you know, oh, my gosh, you know, I’ve got to get John to soccer practice, and Lisa has to go to ballet practice. And I’m one person. How can I be. So the plate is overflowing, but if one is not lost, they’re able to manage that a lot better in making the plate not quite overflow as much, but actually make the plate bigger. So that’s. That’s how I would describe a great way of recognizing that you’re lost. But I will also say that in those feelings, they can actually manifest themselves into illness. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Michelle Bishop And so there’s. There’s a lot of things that we ignore all the time. And if we just take a moment and listen, we get to choose. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Our body is really great at communicating to us. When, When. When the inside, like. And I do, and I mean, like, the soul and the emotions are not happy, then it will start to manifest in. In the body as well. And I think, and I’ll just share this from my experience, I think the other way sometimes being lost manifest is feeling, like, stuck. You know, you’re not sure. It’s like you. You want to go this way, but maybe, but. But something is wanting you to go that way, and then you wind up confused, which is, I think is another one is. Is like, you know, I. I don’t know which way to go, and it’s. And, yeah, it’s. And. And that kind of is the definition of lost, isn’t it? Sometimes, you know, when you don’t know where to go. Michelle Bishop Yeah, absolutely. That’s a great point. And. And in that lost journey, often we will befriend the wrong group of people and, and that just drives us further down the rabbit hole. And so I, I think your point is very well taken. Gloria Grace Rand I appreciate that. And I’m gonna, I’m gonna shift gears here because we’re starting to wind down a little bit. But I’d love to be able to ask our, our guests this question and see what they have to say about it. So what are you curious about right now? Michelle Bishop It’s interesting that you asked that question because I’m curious about where the journey will take me in my next steps. I am so excited to having and to get the opportunity to help others, to. To see in that journey, because a journey is not a destination. I am, I’m curious about how this journey is going to lead, and I am doing it very organically. I am doing it with no, no expectations. I am doing it just as it’s supposed to be and letting it. Let it happen. And it leaves me curious all the time and, and very excited. Gloria Grace Rand Well, yeah, I like that. And it is interesting. We. We live in interesting times, and it is sometimes more challenging than others. But I think if we can keep an open mind and an open heart and just be curious, I think it’s a. It’s a great way to be. Is there anything else that I should have asked you, but I didn’t. Any other last point you want to leave our audience with today? Michelle Bishop We didn’t really get an opportunity to talk about the physical manifestations that it can occur from not choosing. Gloria Grace Rand That’s true. Okay. Yeah. Michelle Bishop Yeah. I’d love to share with. With everyone that over this, this journey over the last five years and maybe over. More importantly, maybe over the last two or three two years, I’m five foot tall, so I’m a little person. And I was at a top weight of 212 pounds, and I have lost over 100 pounds. And everybody asked me how. How that happened. And you know, it also was a journey, but I really see it as it unmasking itself through all of the past and being free to be able to be essentially who I am in my best health. And I am a breast cancer survivor. I’m also, I was on like, the highest level of blood pressure medicine. So all of those things through my lifetime did manifest itself physically and without, again, your physical and mental health, you have nothing. And it wasn’t that it was this difficult, like I said, small pivots of movement and being grateful in those moments and proud of yourself and reinforcing yourself to say, hey, you’ve Got this. Because others are there to support you, too, that I want them to know, all of the listeners, that it’s all bundled in as our own selves. And so this is the true, authentic me. And as a small child, I was a very small child, and I had gained all that weight through all the trials and tribulations of life. And I’m truly happy that I have gotten this opportunity in life to be able to be freed from those. Those chains and that armor. And it is possible, and anything is possible if you do make that choice, to choose you first. Gloria Grace Rand My goodness. So, yes. First off, though, I want to congratulate you on thriving past breast cancer. And isn’t it interesting, though, that that was the cancer, because I was. I think I was talking with someone else recently that again, you know, that’s kind of, you know, if you have that before you started really embracing your own self and loving yourself and. See, and that’s where cancer manifests, right near the heart. And so it’s good that you’ve learned how to do that. And the weight issue, Well, I can relate to that as well because. Yeah, I mean, one. One of the things that I had noted down in my diary was, like, how much I weighed, and it was, like, really kind of heavy for the age that I was. And. And weight has been something that I have been dealing with all my life. I do think finally now I have actually figured out how to eat. And. And I’m still on my. I’m still on my journey. I have a little ways to go yet, but I feel so much better than did last fall when I was much heavier. And so it’s. Yeah, like I said, we’re like. We’re like sisters from another mother or something. And it is. Michelle Bishop It’s. It’s a journey and it’s a lifestyle. I mean, it is all. It’s all linked. It’s all linked. And heck, you know, I might waver a little bit up, too. We don’t know. I have. I don’t have a crystal ball, but I just want to be the best me I can be. And I want everyone else to live their best them. And so I want to be a conduit to bringing all the resources together so that people get that choice and they’re informed and they know that the end of the opportunity to have the journey isn’t the destination, it’s the joy in the journey. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Oh, this is so good. And I know that there are people listening to this or are. Have resonated with you and want to be able to connect with you. So where is the best place that people can do that? Michelle Bishop I have a website and it is BishopLife.com and it’s probably the best way to connect because it has all my social media and I have blogs and when I do summits and do podcasts, like this wonderful one with Gloria, I’ll have it posted on there as well so we can build a community together as one. Gloria Grace Rand All right, excellent. Well, I will be sure and have that in the show notes for folks who are listening to this on their favorite podcast platform. So thank you so much for being with us today and being with me today. Michelle Bishop Honor. I’ve so enjoyed all of it. Thank you. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, me too. And I want hope everyone out there does take advantage and contacts you, gets in touch with you. And I do want to go this way. And there we go. Hit the wrong button, but that’s okay. Michelle Bishop Don’t forget about my book, too. Gloria Grace Rand That’s right. Yeah, absolutely. There we go. Michelle Bishop It’s a good start. Gloria Grace Rand Yes, yes. In fact, I’ll do it. There we go. I’m just. Okay, I’m, I’m playing today. So there we go. We’re being, we’re, we’re just experimenting with Streamyard. And anyway, so thank you all for listening and for watching today. And I think, yeah, I think make sure that you’re subscribed on YouTube, podcast, Apple, Spotify, where have you. And until next time, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

Do you long for a way to awaken your creativity so your content creation process happens with ease? If you’re nodding your head, this episode is tailor-made for you. As a woman entrepreneur over 50, I understand the unique marketing challenges we face, especially when life throws us curveballs. Today, I’m sharing a powerful process that will help you tap into your inner wisdom and create content that aligns with your soul while attracting your ideal clients. Show Notes | Transcript “Getting to know and trust those inner hits, these sparks of inspiration that come through is really great because… you’ll start to listen to them more and more, and you’ll get more and more of them.” – Gloria Grace Rand In this episode, I open up about my personal journey through grief, separation, and the challenges of maintaining both a spiritual practice and a business during difficult times. I share how these experiences have shaped my approach to content creation, offering insights that can help you navigate your own transitions with grace and authenticity. Discover how to: Tap into divine downloads for inspired content ideas Overcome common blocks like perfectionism and the need for external validation Create content that resonates with your audience on a deeper level Align your marketing with your soul’s purpose Key insights include: The importance of self-forgiveness when making mistakes in business How to recognize and respect your life experiences as valuable content material Why embodying your message is crucial for creating magnetic content The power of delivering your message with confidence, even when sharing messy truths I also introduce you to the SACRED method, a unique approach I’ve developed to foster inspiration and connection with your higher self. This method combines practical steps with spiritual insights to help you create content that truly shines. As a special bonus, I share a brief light language transmission designed to clear energetic blocks and strengthen your connection to your inner wisdom. This powerful sound healing modality has been instrumental in my own journey and may offer you unexpected insights and clarity. Whether you’re struggling to find your voice in your content or simply looking to deepen your connection with your audience, this episode offers compassionate guidance and practical strategies. Tune in to start tapping into your inner wisdom and create content that not only attracts your ideal clients but also aligns with the truth of who you are. Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT – Awaken Your Creativity: Content Creation with Heart and Soul Episode featuring a transformative content creation process for women entrepreneurs over 50 Introduction: When Life Challenges Impact Your Content Namaste. If you’re feeling lost, in transition, maybe unsure of your next steps and stuck for ideas when it comes to content marketing, today’s episode is for you. I’m going to be sharing a process that will allow you to tap into your inner wisdom and create content that aligns with your soul and attracts who you want to work with. Welcome to Live Love Engage, especially if you are new. I am Gloria Grace, founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 and especially women entrepreneurs over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are, lead boldly and shine their light in the world. Life Transitions That Disrupt Content Creation Common Life Changes After 50 When you reach a certain stage in life – and most of my audience is over 40 – you most likely have possibly become an empty nester or are about to become one. You may be going through relationship changes. Life happens. We get to midlife and sometimes it’s losing a spouse to death, unfortunately, or a marriage breaking up. Maybe you’ve lost a loved one – it doesn’t have to be a spouse. It could be a really close family member, like I went through when I lost my sister a few years ago. She was the last member of my immediate family that I grew up with. How Life Challenges Affect Business Owners When these things happen as business owners, they can really throw a wrench in the works and cause a lot of upheaval. For instance, you may have been a very spiritual person your whole life, and now suddenly, because of this life challenge, you’re not feeling so spiritual anymore. That’s what happened to me when my sister passed. I had been meditating daily for about six years, and it had really helped me through helping her with her cancer journey. But after she passed, I really felt alone and didn’t feel that strong connection to my higher power, to my higher self, to God, Source, universe – however you want to call it. A Message of Hope for Those Struggling If you are right now going through something like that, and it may seem really challenging, and you’re like “Am I ever going to feel like myself again?” – you will. You will. I’m feeling very emotional because I feel like there is somebody out there listening to this right now who is feeling that way. So I just want you to know that you’ll get there. The Importance of Getting Support Don’t Go Through Challenges Alone Don’t think you have to do this alone. For me, I went to group grief counseling sessions a couple times. I went to a counselor. I did a lot of alternative healing modalities. I was in a mastermind at the time with wonderful, supportive people who helped me. I worked with different coaches along the way. When we’re going through stuff, we get in our own little head and can’t see the forest for the trees. If I’m speaking to you, pay attention – get help. You can schedule a call at engagewithgloria.com and let’s chat. Either I can help you directly or I’ll point you in the right direction. When Content Creation Becomes Challenging The Struggle with Authentic Content During Crisis When you go through these life challenges, it can make it challenging to create content, even on a regular basis, or content that feels genuine. Sometimes we may wind up buying programs that we think are going to help us, but because we’re still in the midst of this life-changing thing, we’re not able to give 100% to it. My Personal Experience with Misaligned Content I went through this a couple years ago when I separated from my husband. I thought this was great – I’m on my own, this is what I wanted. But I had to go through some grieving of the marriage that didn’t last like I intended when we set our vows 30-plus years ago. I enrolled in a program to help me create a coaching program. I was following their recommendations, and some of the content I created got engagement, but it didn’t result in sales. I didn’t get any new clients. My belief now is that I wasn’t fully ready and wasn’t aligned with my soul. Learning from Mistakes I’ve since learned to take my time before making decisions because I’m a manifesting generator in human design. I need to sit with something before I invest. With that program, I probably saw it and thought “This is what I need” and invested right away. It didn’t work so well, but I learned some good stuff. The Importance of Self-Forgiveness We make mistakes and it’s okay. Self-forgiveness is really important. You want to give yourself some grace and know that sometimes you may make a mistake when you’re in the throes of something. Just forgive yourself and try again. Understanding Divine Downloads What Are Divine Downloads? There’s a term I’ve used before called a “divine download.” Essentially, it’s inspiration that comes out of nowhere. If you’re a regular subscriber of this podcast, you know that inspiration really comes from your higher self or God or Source – whatever your beliefs are. My First Major Divine Download One of the first times I had a major divine download was when the idea popped in my head while I was meditating to write a book about love. I thought that was crazy. But I do have a book now called “Live Love Engage: How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Being Yourself,” which includes the Love method. Love is an acronym. That’s an example of a divine download. How Divine Downloads Show Up It’s that sudden inspiration that comes to you. It can also be that idea that pops in your head while you’re in the shower or doing dishes. It doesn’t have to be during meditation. Guidance can show up in conversations with people – maybe there’s a recurring theme that comes up. A Recent Example of Divine Guidance A couple weeks back, I was reading a book by an old client of mine, Vicki Kennedy. It’s called “It’s Never Personal” – I highly recommend it. She’s a psychologist who weaves in spirituality, Buddhism, and Hinduism. As I was reading this book, I suddenly got this thought that when I wrote about the love method in my book, there was something before that needed to be talked about that I didn’t do. The L in the love method stands for “let go and let God,” including letting go of limiting beliefs. I realized it might be helpful if, before you delve into the love method, you figure out what your limiting beliefs are. Following the Divine Guidance Two days ago, I went to an event where a wonderful coach led us through a meditation where we reflected on our life ending. What came up for me was that before I leave this planet, I need to work on this new idea. Yesterday I spent about a half hour starting to write about it. Then this morning, as I was recording this (it’s a Wednesday and normally I record a ten-minute Wisdom Wednesday), today’s Daily Word was about teenagers – not really my demographic. As I was doing something, maybe journaling, it hit me that I could do a Wisdom Wednesday on one of my values. One of my values is authenticity, and I found a wonderful message in their archive. The Wealth of Your Inner Wisdom You have a wealth of experience in your life. Spending time in reflection and getting to know and trust those inner hits – these sparks of inspiration – is really great because you’ll start to listen to them more and more, and you’ll get more and more of them. Common Blocks to Inner Wisdom Perfectionism Some common blocks that might come up, especially if you’re going through transition, include perfectionism. That can keep you from sharing content or even creating content because you’re spending too much time overanalyzing and wanting it to be perfect. There’s a great quote from Napoleon Hill: “It’ll never be just right, so don’t wait. Go ahead and create content.” When you can create it from your heart, that’s going to be good. External Validation Sometimes we want external validation – somebody else’s opinion. If you’re in a coaching program working with a coach, it can be good to get somebody else’s opinion, but then you have to use your own discernment and decide whether to follow that person’s advice. This process of learning how to trust yourself is so necessary. When you’re going through life stuff, you might forget how to do that, and that’s okay. Give yourself some time and space. Taking Breaks from Business That might mean putting your business on the back burner temporarily or putting some of your content creation on hold. I’ve seen people posting that they’ve been away for a little bit – they needed some self-care time, but now they’re back. It’s absolutely okay to take time away from social media. Make sure your business can withstand that. Ideally, you have some pieces in place that are already generating income, especially if this is your number one source of income. Have some way to continue getting income while you take a break from marketing – maybe schedule things ahead or hire a virtual assistant. Introducing the SACRED Method Created with AI Assistance I’m going to be 100% transparent and share that I created this process – actually, it was created for me by Claude AI. Claude came up with the concept based on interactions with me. There are a lot of people freaking out about AI, but it can be very helpful. After it came up with this, I went on Perplexity AI and Google to search because I wanted to make sure nobody else was using this – I didn’t want copyright infringement. This is something I may wind up trademarking because I’ve tweaked some of this. One of the letters I actually changed because I didn’t like it. You can use AI for inspiration and sometimes have it help you create something new, but then you put your own spin on it. It came up with a lovely outline of bullet points, but now I’m walking you through it and putting my secret sauce into it. The SACRED Method Overview It’s to help you get into that wonderful state of mind to start fostering inspiration for your content creation. It’s called the SACRED Method. SACRED is an acronym. S – Silence and Stillness The Foundation of Inner Wisdom If you’ve listened to any of my episodes, especially my solo ones, you know I love the phrase “be still and know.” I am a huge proponent of meditation. When you can be quiet – and you can listen to maybe soothing music with different hertz frequencies that are really good for you. Daily Practice Recommendations For me, I do it every morning. You have to figure out what time of day works best for you. Spend at least five minutes a day – you can carve out five minutes no matter how busy your life and business are. Even if it’s not meditating, maybe it’s just sitting. I’ve done this too – just sat in my living room and stared out the window. If thoughts come in your head like “I’ve got to get groceries” or “I need to make dinner,” just say “okay, thank you,” and then look out and see if you can find a bird or a pretty tree or flowers and focus on that for a few minutes. Benefits of Stillness The more you do this, there are physical benefits – it helps your blood pressure and certainly lowers your stress level. Give yourself that gift of being still because that’s what opens up that channel for inspiration. When we’ve got the monkey mind going, how are you going to hear anything? A – Ask with Intention Preparing for Inspiration I don’t often do this, but I might start adding this into my routine. Maybe even before you sit down to meditate, ask yourself these questions: What does my audience need to hear most from me today? What lesson am I currently learning that could serve others? What boundary do I need to model in my business? I like the first two in particular. This would be good before you even sit down to be still. C – Capture Without Judgment Recording Divine Downloads When those ideas pop into your head, write them down and don’t overthink it. Your right brain – your intuitive side – is being activated. Let that flow because later you can tap into the left side (logical) and refine it. Methods for Capturing Ideas Allow whatever comes through to come through. Make a voice memo on your phone or jot things down. Sometimes you’ll get hits in the car – I remember a few weeks back, I was driving to a friend’s and listening to something when an idea popped in. I had to carefully get a voice memo. When Ideas Slip Away Sometimes if you don’t write it down right away, it can disappear into the ether. When that has happened, I’ve said, “Okay, if this was meant to be, would you please allow me to remember this later?” Ask the angels – there’s a wonderful book called “Ask the Heavens.” Our spirit guides want to be of service, but they like to be invited. R – Recognize and Respect Honoring Your Life Experience This is the letter I changed. As you’re creating content and hopefully gotten some ideas already, I invite you to recognize where you are in your life right now and what has come before. What life experiences have led you to where you are today? Respect those. Mining Content from Experience You can really mine wonderful content from your life experiences and even what you’re going through right now. Recognize that perhaps you are in a mess, but know that mess could have a message for other people going through something similar. Take advantage of that. E – Embody the Message Living Your Guidance Live that guidance and then share it. When you are honoring your mess and embodying whatever insights you may have gotten, then when you go to write content or do a video or however you’re sharing it, that’s what’s going to create magnetic content. The Importance of High Vibration Before you go to write, you want to be in a high vibe state so you’re really coming from the heart. If you’re miserable, our words (even written) carry a vibration and your audience is going to pick up on that. Sharing from the Heart When you’re sad or angry or afraid, sharing something on social media right then is likely not the best idea. Your audience is going to feel that. When you can instead come from a happy place and then talk about “this happened in the past” or “I’m going through this,” it’s going to be much better received. You want to come to a point where you can have a little bit of distance from those rough emotions. You can say “this happened and it sucks” but maybe do it with a smile on your face because crying is going to be felt. D – Deliver with Confidence Trusting Your Voice Just trust your voice. Trust the message, even if it is messy, because there are people out there that need what you have to share. They need what you are selling and they are waiting for you to show up in front of them. Authentic Self-Expression Be your authentic self and start trusting that you have what you need within you. It’s just a matter of asking. Sometimes you do need some support. I’m in a program right now that is really helping me create my brand legacy, and it’s helping me in ways I didn’t even necessarily expect. Light Language Healing Session Introduction to Light Language One thing I want to share with you is a light language message. This is a practice I’ve been doing for several years now, and it has really helped me strengthen my connection to my higher self. Meditation and journaling absolutely work, but this has helped clear out energetic blocks I wasn’t even aware of. How Light Language Works This is a sound healing modality – a multi-dimensional language that your left brain is not going to understand, but it’s designed for the right brain, your heart, and your soul. I will be speaking a language or singing (I’m never quite sure what comes out) with the intention that: The message you hear is for your soul’s highest good It will help clear away whatever might be blocking you from truly connecting with your higher self It will help you start getting more divine downloads regularly Preparation for the Session If you are listening somewhere where you are operating heavy machinery or driving a car, pause this and come back to it later. I want you to be in a place where you can be still and perhaps even close your eyes if you like. Just sit back and allow whatever sounds come through to speak to your heart. [Light language session would be included here in the actual recording] Booking Private Sessions If you would love to have a private session with me where we can do a particular session geared specifically to what is serving you, go to gloriagracerand.com or bit.ly/LLEpodcast30. That’ll take you right to my calendar where you can schedule a session with me. SACRED Method Summary and Homework Quick Review of the SACRED Method S – Silence and Stillness A – Ask with Intention C – Capture without Judgment R – Recognize and Respect E – Embody the Message D – Deliver with Confidence Your Daily Practice Assignment Set aside a minimum of five minutes a day for that stillness and silence. Even if you don’t necessarily meditate, maybe just sit and look out the window, but start developing that habit. It’s going to help spur that spark of imagination and inspiration that will come through. Trust Your Inner Wisdom Your wisdom is the content the world needs, so trust it. Next Week’s Episode Preview Make sure you are subscribed to the podcast because next week I have a fabulous interview with Michelle Bishop. She is a master certified life coach and author of the book “Choose You First.” She and I are very aligned because she helps women reclaim their lives after adversity by embracing self-love and building inner resilience. Subscribe on your favorite podcast platform and on YouTube so you won’t miss that episode because you’ll get notifications. Conclusion: Living Your Authentic Truth Until then, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically. Don’t forget to subscribe to Live Love Engage for more episodes helping women entrepreneurs over 50 tap into their inner wisdom and create soul-aligned businesses.

Have you ever considered that your deepest pain could lead to powerful personal growth? In this enlightening episode, I sit down with Craig Perra, founder of the Mindful Habit system, to explore the profound wisdom in our emotional wounds that can be revealed through self-leadership. Show Notes | Transcript “The deeper the wound, the greater the healing. And so your greatest pain becomes your greatest teacher.” – Craig Perra Craig shares his inspiring journey from the depths of addiction and self-destruction to becoming a renowned life coach. His story is a testament to the transformative power of compassion, both from others and ourselves. “All behavior is need-seeking behavior,” Craig reveals, offering a perspective-shifting insight that challenges our traditional views of “good” and “bad” habits. This understanding forms the foundation of his approach to healing and personal transformation. In this episode, you’ll discover how to: How to recognize and communicate with different parts of yourself The surprising truth about anger and other ‘negative’ emotions Practical techniques for using mindfulness to navigate triggering situations Why breathing and gratitude are more powerful than you might think Key insights include: The Internal Family Systems model and its application in personal growth How our habits and patterns often stem from childhood experiences The importance of curiosity and compassion in self-leadership Why connection is crucial for overcoming addiction and emotional challenges Whether you’re grappling with personal challenges, seeking to understand your emotional responses better, or looking to support a loved one through difficult times, this conversation offers valuable insights and practical strategies for growth and healing. Tune in to learn how embracing all parts of yourself – even the ones you’ve labeled as “bad” – can lead to profound personal transformation and a more fulfilling life. Connect with Craig Website: mindfulhabithelp.com Podcast: Sex Afflictions and Porn Addictions Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Gloria Grace Rand Have you ever considered how the pain of betrayal could actually become the catalyst for your most powerful transformation? Well, today’s conversation with our guest is going to dive deep into healing those invisible wounds so that you’re able to reclaim your self worth and turn your journey of self love into a beacon of inspiration for others. But before we get there, I do want to welcome those of you who are maybe new to the podcast or welcome those of you who are wonderful subscribers. I want to welcome you back. And for those who are new, I am Gloria Grace, the founder of Align to Shine Academy. And I work with spiritually minded women entrepreneurs, help them to break free from self doubt and really, really step into their highest potential. And part of that is dealing with some of the things we’re going to be talking about today. So in just a moment, I’m going to bring on Craig Perra, who is the founder of the Mindful Habit system. And Craig overcame his own mental health struggles and addictions to become a renowned life coach. And as a global leader in breaking self destructive habits, Craig’s transformative approach blends mindfulness, self leadership and actionable strategies, empowering millions to create healthier, more fulfilling lives. So I can’t wait to hear what he has to say on this subject. I hope you can’t either. So without further ado, let me bring him up here and welcome you, Craig, officially to Live Love Engage. Craig Perra Thank you, Gloria. It’s a privilege to be here. Namaste. Right back at you. I’m happy to be here. Look forward to this conversation we’re going to have today. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely, me too. And, and I know it’s, you know, I guess we don’t like to necessarily talk about, you know, having emotional wounds and things like that, but it does actually affect our, you know, behavior and, and it can affect our work and our family life. And I mentioned in your bio that you deal with self leadership and so I’m curious to know how that actually plays a role in the healing process. And yeah, we’re going to start there and then I got a follow up question, but we’ll start there. Craig Perra Yeah, no, great question. So self leadership is a term that comes from at least these two places that I’ll talk about. So first is from a professional development leadership training, positive psychology, this notion of making proactive decisions, owning the outcome, you know, responsibility for what’s happening in your life. So there’s the leadership aspect of self leadership. That’s also a term that has been embraced by the internal family systems model. And that’s Essentially an evidence based, neuroscientifically sound behavior change modality referenced in popular culture in the Pixar movie Inside out, which is essentially leading the different parts of you to create positive outcomes. So for example, in our betrayed trauma work, there’s a part that maybe gets angry and feels resentful for the choices that in my line of work that the husband made, to lie, to cheat, to know, keep a secret porn life. And so it’s, it’s essentially leading those parts to create positive outcomes. And it’s a, it’s a term that I love. It really is on the positive side. And, and I, that’s my thing. I really try to focus on the positive side, strengthen the positive to, you know, strengthen the negative. So that’s, that’s basically what that term means. Gloria Grace Rand Well, I, I appreciate that and I love the example of, of Inside out, you know, that wonderful movie too, that I think that that helps to make things a little bit more relatable. So I appreciate you sharing that. So what’s one practical technique that someone could start implementing today with regards to self leadership in I, I guess maybe either of those formats or both. Craig Perra So before the technique, it’s really important to understand that in the internal family systems model and using basic self leadership principles that, let’s take for an example, a spouse who is angry at her husband for the choices he’s made, destroyed the family, kept sexual secrets, there is a deep, deep, deep sense of betrayal, trauma. And there’s often a resentful part, there’s often an angry part. And, and before we get to the technique, the insight that I want to share is that these parts, although perceived as bad or destructive or, or harmful to a, A, you know, a healthy reunion, the reality is that these parts are trying to protect you. In fact, the name for these types of parts in the internal family systems model is a protector. So anger is a protector. Anger is trying to protect the partner from making the same mistake. Again for trusting when she shouldn’t trust, for the fear of letting her guard down. That angry part keeps her vigilant, for example. And so I, I think it’s really important to understand that this behavior, although causing distress to the central nervous system, dysregulation, high blood pressure, heart issues, over time, that’s the damage that stress and anxiety and anger can do. But they are serving a purpose and they are meeting needs. Self leadership requires you to understand the needs that these parts are meeting so you can lead that part to a healthy outcome. If that makes sense. Gloria Grace Rand Oh yeah, I love that, and, and, and it’s. I so appreciate you doing that to, to explain because, yeah, so often we really do think that, oh, you know, anger is this, you know, emotion that we, you know, we have, but we don’t necessarily, you know, sometimes we really do categorize it as bad, you know, and it’s like, and I know that, like, and I’m just thinking back to, to my mom that, who had a lot of anger with my dad because he was an alcoholic. And so she would, you know, naturally, you don’t like being married to someone who’s involved in that. And so she had a lot of anger. But I can, but I also understand and can appreciate how that could be a protective mechanism. I never really thought about it that way, but it really is, you know, because it is, it’s kind of, you know, protecting your heart because it’s already been wounded once and you don’t want to get it, continue to have that, you know, make it make it worse, you know, to really inflict more damage. So I appreciate that. Thank you so much. So how can then someone start kind of moving into, you know, using self leadership to say, okay, yes, I know I’m angry and I’m trying to protect myself, but I don’t want to stay anger angry because as you said, it can really cause a lot of physical harm to the body. Craig Perra Yes. And so just like leadership requires us to lead, we might lead Johnny on our team and Karen on our team very differently. They have different needs, they have different desires, different goals. So I’m going to lead these two people on my team very differently. And one of the first things that people can do, which is a wonderful technique and it sounds absolutely crazy, but there is a lot of data to support the efficacy or effectiveness of talking to yourself in the third person. So one of the techniques that we have, and let’s say we’ve got a partner who’s resentful or angry or they’re constantly ruminating, they’re wondering, is he doing this, is he doing that? That part is trying to protect them. And, and one of the first things we do before we get to, you know, and there are the techniques and the mindfulness and interrupting, but at a deeper level, talking, as crazy as this sounds, engaging in dialogue with this angry part, for example, in literally journaling, like you’re writing a play, like you’re talking to a separate entity, you’re talking to this part of you, just like in the Pixar movie Inside out, in learning anger. Okay, this isn’t the first time we’ve been angry. Where did you come from? And then inevitably, Gloria, anger is a learned behavior. It’s something so. So all that family of origin work that many of your clients have done in therapy, but they don’t know what to do with that information. Now they’ve got a container to understand how was anger trained to protect me? Where did you come from? Anger? And what happens in this dialogue is number one, by personifying this part of you, it creates a little distance and a little understanding and reinforces the notion that I’m in charge. This is a part I’m going to get curious instead of angry, resentful, and feel shame because I’m not supposed to feel this way, even though I know it’s making things worse, it’s pushing my husband away. And let’s say in this example where he’s actually doing the right things and I want to move towards him, but I can’t because anger is protecting you. Anger is not going to let you let that guard down. And when he does something wrong, you’re going to let him know about it. And so this conversation not only brings structure to the internal dialogue that people are having in their heads, which can be really, really, really self destructive, it begins to introduce this principle of self leadership that I’m in charge, not the part I’m in charge. The self is the center of the internal family systems model, the core, the soul, the part that isn’t stained or corrupted. It’s just that essence inside us. And so that’s the essence of self leadership is leading from that place of essence versus a reactive, defensive, you know, dysregulated, you know, place of reactivity. So in summary, because I have a tendency to, you know, give, give long answers in summary, talk to the part, engage the part in conversation, just like you’re writing a two person play, find out where anger comes from. And then the second question would be, what does this angry part need? Gloria Grace Rand Right. Yes. I knew I had to feel. Like I said, you’re gonna say, it’s like, yeah, you’re like, what? Because I’m just envisioning myself, you know, doing this. It’s like, okay, so what, what do you want? You know, what, what can I do for you? What, what is, what’s going on? And you know, and how can I help? Because I think it’s so important for us to have kind conversations with these parts of ourselves. And I mean, I was doing this the other day, I’m doing some work on myself where I’m looking at old Childhood patterns and a lot of emotion was coming up and I had to just kind of be, be kind to myself and compassionate and say, you know, yes, middle school was rough and you got through it and I love you. And I think it’s so important to be able to reassure ourselves. I think even when, you know, especially when we’re going through some emotional challenges like that. What do you think about that? You know, is it because I think there might be some people out there who are saying like, oh come on, really, really to have this conversation with myself, it sounds a little crazy. So what would you say to the naysayers out there? Craig Perra I would say you’re right, it definitely does sound crazy. I’m not going to disagree with you there. However, this isn’t, you know, crazy, Craig, you know, making something up. This model, the parts work has been around for 2,000 years. The internal family systems model. There’s three to four year waiting list to get into this evidence based training which I feel blessed to have completed. This is a neuroscientifically sound model and you don’t need neuroscience to say, you know what? There is a part of me that gets angry. And sometimes that anger, you know, doesn’t accomplish the desired objective to protect me. In fact it makes me feel worse. Or there is a part of me that feels insecure or resentful and can’t stop thinking about whatever it is that I’m thinking about. And when you step back and realize all of these quote unquote bad parts are trying to help because almost all behavior is need seeking behavior that trigger that you have the thought that you get the action that you take when you feel your top’s about to burst off. All trained condition responses, all need seeking behavior. And not only is it neuro scientifically sound or supported by the evidence, it is practical because we do talk to ourselves. And this model brings some structure to it. And for those of you who are skeptical, pause and listen and you’ll find yourself having a conversation with yourself throughout the day. When you’re driving in the car, you’re reacting to something someone close to you does, like your husband or partner. We’re having these conversations anyway. And it does feel like a part of me takes over and that part of you that takes over instead of it being bad or wrong. No, that part is trying to meet a need the way it was trained to meet a need. And when you embrace that reality that there are need, no bad parts, no bad habits, bad outcomes. Absolutely. There’s plenty of bad outcomes. But from A neuroscience perspective, it’s not good or bad. Our habits are trained, conditioned responses. Our environmental training that sits on top of a biological reality. And talking to these parts helps you have compassion for yourself. It helps you discover the true nature of what that part is trying to accomplish to protect you. And through that conversation, you learn, okay, I understand getting angry. Screaming, yelling, swearing, throwing things, whatever it might be, is your way of doing it, but is there another way that we can protect our hearts that doesn’t have the impact, for example, that anger has on the body, which is always a net negative because you feel physically bad. And the cortisol and the adrenaline and the stress and the anxiety and the dysregulation that takes one to two, sometimes three days to recover from. So, yeah, open your mind, open your heart, and start talking to yourself. And I promise, I can almost guarantee that just about, for everyone listening, there will be a voice that responds and like, okay, now you’re looking at me now, you know, and there’ll be a response. There will be a response. Gloria Grace Rand Oh, yeah, absolutely. And I know probably that some. Some folks out there who may be listening to this are. Are familiar with the. The idea of, like, the shadow, you know, that we have the shadow side to us. And, and that’s really kind of what you’re talking about. And, and I know people say that, oh, you know, the shadow side is bad, but as you’re pointing out, it’s not. It’s really is. It’s part of who we are, and it is this way of being able to help us. It’s so. It is. I love that you said, you know, be curious and ask. Ask questions about it, because that’s. That’s the key to help you be able to start unpacking some of this. So I want. I’m curious. I’m curious to find out how then exactly can, let’s say, say, mindfulness work, especially in maybe moments when we’re getting triggered, you know, maybe, you know, even though we are. Say we’re. We’re trying to, you know, have this better relationship with this person, but, you know, because again, you know, we’re human and they’re going to maybe do something that’s going to be, you know, not quite what we wanted them to do. And so how can we. Is there way. What kind of ways can we be able to sort of, you know, nip this in the bud before we totally fly off the handle? Craig Perra Yeah, I’m going to give the advice, Gloria, but I want to share one teeny, tiny story. I Had ruptured my brachial plexus. About eight years ago, I was in the worst pain of my life. I thought I was going to die. I have abused drugs in my past. I started getting pill triggers, and then I started getting heroin triggers, because what’s the difference? It’s all the same big fart, you know, like this stupid rationale that only a drug addict can do. And I’m in excruciating pain. And I Talked to a PhD colleague of mine, and I told him about my pain. And I’m expecting to get some big answer and some science and some, you know, here are the five steps. And he says, craig, you teach this. I know what you teach. I listen to your podcast. All you have to do is breathe and practice gratitude. Gloria. He could see the look on my face. I thought that was the stupid advice I ever heard. Even knowing what I know I needed. I needed something to do. Anyway, he sent me to a chronic pain program. I studied in that chronic pain program for three months. Hardcore science. The end result, Breathe and practice gratitude. It was. It was. And I remember calling him back and saying, hey, Ben. And Ben, you know, I’m going to share this with him. So, hi, Ben. Thank you again. It. What mindfulness does the. When you get dysregulated, you’re essentially your trigger response plan. You’re using your awareness of the triggers, of the thoughts, of the physiological reaction to do something else. And one of the most effective things that you can do. And I know you know this glorious. I’m reinforcing a lesson I heard you teach. Breathe. There is magic in the breath. The more you read about it, the more you learn about it. There’s a great book out there called Breathe. I forget the author’s name. And it’s basically like 200 pages of why this is ridiculously important and the science behind it. And. And they’re still trying to figure out why it works so much. A nice slow inhale, a nice slow exhale has. Does wonders. And I know it’s such an oversimplified answer, and I know sometimes I was tired of hearing this answer, quite frankly. And I taught this answer to clients when I was in pain. And I needed to go through that scientific step by step around the science of gratitude, the science of mindfulness. And so literally stopping and breathing and focusing on what’s happening in your body. Get out of your head into your body. What does anxiety, stress, anger, shame feel like? And what happens when you do that? The space between your thoughts grows. You’re Less likely to attach to those negative thoughts that we’ve been trained and conditioned ourselves to attach to because we learned at some point in our lives they were serving us. They don’t. So that’s a long way of saying breathe and practice gratitude. Gratitude for it. And it’s not like it’s not all, you know, someone, someone starving in a third world country. I shouldn’t feel this way. I’m so weak and pathetic because here I am upset over this when these horrors are going on. No, that’s gratitude as a sword. That’s like a sword in the chest. That’s not the gratitude. Gratitude is perspective. Okay, wait a minute. Do I have food? Do I have shelter? Do I have clothing? Am I able to access healthcare? Do I have people around me who love me? Let me, let me, let me, let me step back, let me through that breath, step back to a 5,000ft and say, okay, wait a minute, what do I need to do right now to emotionally regulate in a way that’s not good for him? I’m talking about for the partner. Now that’s good for her self care, her self interest and effectively leading her, her parts. So that’s the power of mindfulness, scientifically proven to reduce depression, reduce anxiety, reduce ptsd, reduce the stress level, cortisol increase well being. And as you know, the list goes on and on and on and on. That’s how powerful it is. It is absolutely life changing and you’ll find people out there packaging it in different ways. And like I had to do the science program, which was an amazing program by Dr. David Hanscom, who wrote the book Back in Control. I have to give him a shout out because it changed my life. Gloria Grace Rand Well, I thank you for sharing all of that. And, and you’re right, I mean it is, it does sound so simple. But it’s, but it’s not because, and, and I’ve had, I know I’ve had other guests on the show who’ve talked about this as well, but it, but it is so important for us to really just pause, you know, just pause and breathe because we get so wanting to react. But if you can just take that breath and just because it gives, it really does give yourself a chance to get from. What is it? I guess away from the limbic part of the brain or something like that, into the prefrontal cortex or something like that. Don’t quote me on this stuff. I’m trying to remember. I do, I do love reading about the brain and how it works. I need to, I need to Read one of my books again because it’s been a couple years since I’ve, since I’ve done it. How to Make a Great Brain great. Or how to Make It. Yeah, something like that. It was a really excellent book, but it’s. Yeah, it’s so important. So thank you for sharing that. And you mentioned a little bit about your, your journey. So can you maybe go in? Because it sounds like since you already had, you talked about, you know, that you were, you were when you broke this whatever bone that was. But, but you already were doing your podcast. So, so what, what led you to become a, you know, transformative coach and what, what was the, you know, kind of the catalyst for your journey to, to be able to. Because you mentioned that, you know, you, you’ve had some self destructive habits of your, of your own in the past. So that might help some of our listeners today to understand that. Craig Perra Yeah, I was hospitalized almost 15 years ago after trying to hurt myself after getting fired from my second job. Within 18 months, it was a terrible low point. I was acting out with drugs, alcohol, prostitutes, pornography. It was a full blown bender. I didn’t feel like I had any worth. I felt that my wife couldn’t stand me, which was not the case at all. It was all in my head. But I am standing here or sitting here in front of you today because at my lowest point, my wife, instead of abandoning me, which she had every right to do, well, first it was self preservation. I got to get this guy back working. Because she was a stay at home mom, my wife Michelle saved my life. She showed me compassion at that low point. She showed me empathy. And even though I knew that she was leaving because she was clear about that, you get back on your feet. I’m not doing this anymore. I said to myself, every second that I am in this woman’s presence, I can use it as an opportunity to show her that I’m growing, that I’m learning. I’m no longer blaming her for all the problems in the relationship. Like the low point, Gloria was so. It was so big and so low. And it’s exactly what I needed because it allowed me to just shatter these illusions that I had been convincing myself that she’s the problem, the kids are the problem, the job’s the problem. No, none of that was the problem. I was the problem. I was broken in so many different ways. And, you know, that kindness saved my life. Then she had this crazy idea that, you know, we should help people. And for the past 13 years, we’ve been doing that and you know, we just celebrated 26 years of marriage and we’ve never been happier. But she’s my ride or die. And I feel really blessed to have such a strong partner by my side. And you would love her. You would absolutely love her. She, she’s, you know, I. Very practical, you know, very, very, very practical, oriented in her guidance and. But she saved my life. Gloria Grace Rand Well, you are definitely blessed to have somebody like that in your life to, to have helped you. And what would you say to somebody out there who maybe is in a different situation where they, they know that they have bottomed out, but they don’t have that person that they can count on. So where would you advise them to turn? Craig Perra Find it. Find that person. Whether it be a friend, a mentor, a support group, an online forum, you know, there’s a millions of wonderful places where you can find like minded individuals. The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety, it’s connection. And that’s one of these phrases that has a whole bunch of science underneath it that prop it up. And you need to get out of that isolation. You need other perspectives. You need mentorship, guidance, leadership. If you can’t find somebody, you know, get a therapist, pay somebody, whatever it is. We are the sum of the five people closest to us. And I can proudly say I’m a hell of a great person because I know I’m surrounded by really great people. But that wasn’t always the case. Find that community, no matter what it takes. Strengthen that community. Volunteer at a charity. Gloria, there’s so many little things, and it doesn’t have to be the big thing, but lots of little things add up to big things. And that’s what I found. It wasn’t some, oh, look, now I’m doing this, everything’s better. It was the accumulation. I’m taking better care of myself. I’m connected with friends, I’m reestablishing connections with family members. I’m involved in my community, like I’m focusing on my spirituality. All those little things add up. And it is so much easier and absolutely critical to have someone by your side to help mentor you and support you. Gloria Grace Rand Oh yeah, I agree with you 100%. It’s interesting. I just started reading a book today called Community and I’m looking forward to diving deep into it, but it really is, and my word for the year is connection. So it’s so important. And this was something that I think we learned the hard way during the pandemic about how important it is for people to be able to be Connected. When you are on your own and, you know, living by yourself, it’s really easy to be able to start, start down the wrong road and start doing, you know, other habits that aren’t as healthy for you, shall we say, as, as, you know, eating, eating well and taking care of your body and getting plenty of exercise and plenty of sleep and all, all of these lovely things that we know maybe intellectually that we need to do. But sometimes we get sucked into, you know, the world and, you know, and, and the drama that some people have. Yeah, life, life happens and it can, can knock us off a little bit. But, but, but having support and I support makes all the difference in the world. What’s, what’s one unexpected lesson maybe about human behavior that your work has taught you? Craig Perra Yeah, I love this question. And here it is. All behavior is need seeking behavior. The addiction, the anger, the lashing out, the defensiveness, the shutting down, the resentment, all of it. When that finally clicked in me, Gloria and I learned, and I remember in my internal family systems training that I was in, and it was the most tense, valuable training I’ve ever taken in my life. And that’s, you know, 20 plus years as an attorney, as an executive before I started coaching. I remember the lady almost as a matter of fact said her name was Cece. And she said, you do know the addict part is trying to help you, right? In the whole training, you could see everybody’s mouth just dropped because there were a number of people in there who struggled, you know, with addiction themselves, or there were partners of someone who struggled with addiction themselves. And that moment represented a monumental shift where I got away from right, wrong, good, bad, bad outcomes. Make no mistake, there’s terrible outcomes. But that addict part is helping you escape, helping you and providing you with a release. It’s helping you with stress and anxiety. It’s a reward. It’s meeting, helping you get rid of pain. It’s meeting needs. So all behavior is need seeking behavior. There’s a couple of exceptions that clients have come up with over the years. But what if I’m hallucinating and I’m flailing my arms? You got me. Okay, that one. What if I’m having a heart attack and I swing my arm and knock over a cup? Okay, you got me then. But when we’re talking, you know, non medical or, you know, non psychosis, it’s an important reflection point. Challenge this as you hear this. No, no. My partner’s resentment couldn’t be meeting a need. That’s bad. It’s bad it’s bad. It’s not bad. It’s creating a bad outcome. But understanding each of our parts has a job. And that job. They’ve been training for that job, you know, since most of that training happened in childhood, because of the. That’s our developmental years, these patterns become our reality. These jobs become our identity. And when you step back and say, wait a minute, instead of looking at this like, good or bad, I’m going to get curious about it and say, what job are you trying to. What are you trying to accomplish right now? When I get angry and, well, I’m trying to protect you from getting hurt. Can’t you feel the boundary violation coming? You see it. You know it’s coming. Look, look, look over there. Over there. These parts are trying to help. And when you meet them with curiosity, in love and compassion and understanding, you get so much better outcomes. Because the other thing that I’ll learn, that I learned is you’ll always lose in a fight against yourself. How you feel about a part is how you feel about yourself, Gloria. And the combination of those three things that I shared with you were absolutely life changing for me and life changing for so many of my clients who are struggling with compulsive sexual behavior, and our partners who are struggling with deep and profound betrayal. Gloria Grace Rand So, yeah, that’s my answer, and it’s a good one. I appreciate it. And I will say, too, is that. And then now this is. My belief is that I. I do feel that some. That we. We make an agreement sometimes to come into this life and. And seek out sometimes these people and things that can hold a mirror up to us so that we can really take a look at. Okay, this is. This is triggering me to react in a certain way. Why is that happening? And sometimes things will happen again and again until we are willing to do that deep work to figure out what is really causing this and that. And that is when that healing can start to happen. So that then you don’t go into repeating those behaviors or seeking out people who are going to maybe, you know, do that. Because I know sometimes, you know, you’ll. You’ll hear. And I’m sure you probably have experienced this in your work with clients. It’s like, why do I keep meeting the same man over and over again, you know, who keeps doing this stuff to me? And it’s like, okay, so what’s the common denominator there? It’s you, right? So have you. Have you run into that? I’m curious, and how have you. I helped your clients in that, yeah. Craig Perra No, I absolutely have. When you get up high enough through awareness and you’re looking down, we’re repeating the same conflict patterns, the same escape patterns. We’re creatures of habit. We need habits to survive. We couldn’t find function. And I wouldn’t be able to grab my coffee mug if it wasn’t for habits. I wouldn’t be able to respond to your question if it wasn’t for habits. We need them to survive. But when you step up, you see that the same patterns are repeating themselves. And we know from attachment theory we learn to bond based upon our childhood experiences and depending upon your attachment style. It’s a difficult message because part of the behavior that is so offensive to our partner clients, it was done in secret. They were manipulated, they were tricked. So, so there, there’s that deception component to it, however, and that’s terrible. Absolutely terrible. But when they unpack their attachment style, their bonding and you know, where they didn’t set boundaries, where they, you know, are going to set boundaries going forward, where they let things slide, they were more tolerant of, you know, unhealthy behaviors. They didn’t speak their mind, they didn’t know their truth, let alone communicate it in a healthy, constructive way. And so yeah, like, like we are creatures of habit and most couples that we’ve worked with can bucket their, categorize their conflicts into three categories, sometimes four, rarely five. But, but we are repeating these same patterns over and over again. And when you treat the underlying wound, wounds and learn how to treat those wounds going forward because as you know, it’s not a one time event, that emotional catharsis doesn’t just happen and everything’s fine. Gloria Grace Rand That’s right. Craig Perra Although we’re, we’re, we’re led to believe that, you know, through our therapy that aha, we did it. It doesn’t work like that. But when you learn to lead your parts and to lead from a place of curiosity, compassion, love, then you start making better choices. And sometimes that choice for many of our partner clients is to stay, then that’s the right decision for them. For others, it’s to go. And that’s the right decision for them. And that is an incredibly empowering place to be when you are choosing. Gloria Grace Rand Oh yes, absolutely. I, yeah. Feels, yeah, it feels like you’re, you are, you finally have your life. You’re, you’re, you’re reclaiming control over your life instead of letting life lead you. So yeah, that’s so good. Is there anything else that I should have asked you about that you know, in regards to, you know, kind of healing some of our wounds or anything else that or any other one last piece of wisdom you want to leave our audience with today. Craig Perra Yeah. The deeper the wound, the greater the healing. In other words, that when you dive in to all that ugly and messy and insecurity and shame and not being good enough, the output of that is self leadership. It’s. You are leading your parts to healthy outcomes, the anger parts being effectively managed. She’ll alert you when a boundary’s being crossed. She’s going to alert you when, you know, when someone’s, you know, trying to get over on you and, and, you know, the parts don’t go away. But that’s the essence of self leadership. And so your greatest pain becomes your greatest teacher. Gloria Grace Rand And that is a really hopeful, hopeful thing to take away from this. I, I so appreciate that because, yeah, it can seem, you know, like, you know, we’ve, we’ve talked about here, being in the throes of things can be so frustrating, make you angry. But to know that there is hope that you can heal from this and, and have it be that greater, greatest healing. I love that. That’s amazing. Now, I know people listening to this are going to want to know more about you and want to know you, and you mentioned you have, you have a podcast as well. So how can, how can people get in touch with you if you want, if they want to connect with you? Craig Perra Sure. So every major place there’s a podcast, you can search for my name, Craig Perra, and the name of the podcast is called Sex Afflictions and Porn Addictions. Many of our clients are men that struggle with compulsive sexual behavior and partners who are awakening to that reality. And if you want more information about me, my wife Michelle, and the program that we run, Visit mindful habit help.com and all the information there. And when you reach out, you call. It’s going to come to us. At least the text message will come to us. We have someone answering the phone. But very quickly you’re going to get connected with us and we’ll do our best to point you in the right direction. Gloria Grace Rand All right, excellent. Well, I will be sure and have that in the show notes for those of you who are listening and in the YouTube description as well. So if you happen to be watching this on YouTube, you can, you can just go down to the description. There’s lots of information down there. So thank you so much for, for being with us today and, and sharing all of your wonderful wisdom and, and I, you know, we’re we’re definitely in alignment. So I love, I love talking with like minded people and sharing, sharing this information because it’s good to hear it from lots of different people because not everybody resonates with the same people. So I appreciate you. Craig Perra That’s right. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Craig Perra Yeah. I appreciate you too, Gloria. Thank you so much for having me. A great honor. Gloria Grace Rand And I do want to thank all of you for listening and for watching. I hope you did receive some value from this episode. And if you’re not subscribed already, I encourage you to do so on your favorite podcast platform. And I think that’s gonna, that’s gonna do it for me this week. So until we meet again, as always, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically.

Are you ready to break free from the people-pleasing trap that has you constantly saying “yes” to clients who drain your energy? If so, join me for this empowering episode where you’ll learn how to market with integrity and set healthy boundaries that honor your worth and fuel business growth. Show Notes | Transcript “No is a complete sentence. You are allowed to say no gracefully.” – Gloria Grace Rand As a recovering people-pleaser myself, I understand the challenges of setting limits in business. I open up about my own journey, including how life transitions can sometimes knock us off course and reignite old patterns. But I’ve learned that boundaries are not just self-care – they’re essential for attracting aligned clients and preventing burnout. Discover how to: Recognize the signs of people-pleasing in your marketing and client relationships Implement practical boundaries to protect your time and energy Attract aligned clients who respect your worth and value your services Market authentically from a place of confidence and self-respect Key insights include: Why your life experience is actually your competitive advantage How to handle objections without desperation or compromising your value The importance of creating content from a high-vibe state Why it’s okay to pause your marketing during major life transitions I also introduce you to the transformative power of light language, a unique sound healing modality that can help clear blocks and strengthen your “boundary muscles.” You’ll experience a brief light language transmission designed to boost your confidence and self-worth. Whether you’re struggling with undercharging, over-explaining your value, or simply feeling drained by misaligned clients, this episode offers compassionate guidance and practical strategies. Tune in to start setting healthy boundaries, honoring your value, and attracting the clients you’re truly meant to serve! Resources: *I apologize, but the bit.ly link I mentioned in the podcast for a free 15 minute light language session doesn’t work. This is the correct one: Schedule a free Light Language session: bit.ly/lightlanguage15 Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. If you’ve ever found yourself saying yes to clients who drain your energy, this episode is your permission slip to do things differently because I’m going to be sharing some practical tools to help you to market authentically, as well as sharing some light language with you to strengthen your boundary muscles and help you develop renewed confidence in your own own innate worthiness. But first, I do want to officially welcome you to Live Love Engage. I am Gloria Grace, founder of align to Shine Academy, and I empower women over 50 to overcome life’s challenges so they can embrace who they are, lead boldly, and shine their light in the world. And I hope that you are one of those lovely women who are listening or watching this podcast on YouTube right now. And I’m just going to even put in an early plug if not subscribed already. Make sure that you subscribe on your favorite podcast platform or on YouTube so you’ll be connected with us. So yeah, this is, you know, boundaries. Sometimes we don’t set boundaries because we are trying to please people and instead of pleasing ourselves. And I know that I’ve definitely experienced this in the past where I have been that people pleaser. And it even came up again, you know, I thought I sort of was having it handled and then, you know, when life throws you new challenges, it can come up again. And so I think the last time that I was really involved in this was shortly after my sister passed. I was in a coaching program at the time and you know, lovely, lovely coaches that were, they were helping me and, and they were really focusing at the time and helping me to choose a niche for. At the time it was really, I was still focused on doing copywriting and I, you know, went along with these recommendations even though my heart really wasn’t in it. And I just felt like I was just throwing darts at a wall, you know, and nothing, nothing was sticking. And as a result, you know, for me and certainly for lots of other people who are people pleasers in business, then I was attracting clients that didn’t really, they were misaligned, frankly. And I also, and was undercharging for my services and I’d been doing that for a very long time, frankly. And it just, I wasn’t really sharing my authentic voice. And also being a people pleaser can really lead to a lot of resentment and burnout if you’re not careful. So let’s, let’s talk about how this shows up in your marketing in particular, so it can be where you are over explaining what your value is and As I mentioned, undercharging for services for sure, and even apologizing for them, you know, when you are, let’s say someone, you know, wants to, wants to hire you, but they feel that you were too expensive, then you might say, well, you know, yeah, I’m sorry. Or, you know, you, you might actually wind up lowering your prices in order to get that client when you need to be standing your ground and saying, no, this is my price. And if, you know, and, and there’s other ways that you can handle someone who comes at you with, with that, you know, saying, oh, you’re too expensive, well, you can offer them maybe something else of value and say, well, you know, maybe throw in a bonus, for instance, and also explain to them that the cost of not taking action, you know, could actually wind up costing them more in the long run. And so it’s actually, your service might be really very affordable when they look, when they look at it from that perspective. So it’s, you know, also part of it is maybe you’re posting content that again, doesn’t really align with you. And I know I have been guilty of that in the past where I was trying too hard to follow other people’s examples and not really own the truth of who I am and to speak from the heart. And I’ve definitely do that now. I much prefer speaking from the heart and I encourage you to do that. And that’s what I work with my clients on doing as well. So, speaking of clients, how does people pleasing and not having boundaries show up there? Well, I tell you, it’s accepting boundary pushes, like, for instance, not, not establishing criteria of, say, okay, I’m going to be available between X and Y time and I’m not going to be available on the weekends. Let’s say, you know, unless it’s a, you know, a really dire emergency. And, you know, and then you could say, okay, well, you could, you could text me then, but it’s really got to be an emergency. So not setting those boundaries can have you working all the time, you know, and, you know, these wonderful phones of ours, they’re, they’re great, but sometimes we just become really too tied to them and that can be a problem. And I, and I actually have, I’ve got a lovely testimonial I think I’ve got on my YouTube channel from, from a client. And this was when I was still doing mainly copywriting and that she, she raved about how I was always available to her. Yeah. Because I wasn’t setting clear boundaries. I didn’t set that at the outset of our relationship to say, okay, you can contact me. You know, I’ll be available to you on these days, between these hours and you know, so you’re, you’re welcome to contact me then. Otherwise, you know, if it’s not an emergency, you know, if it’s after hours, I’ll get back to you the next day. And I didn’t do that. And in my efforts to be, you know, to please my client, I was putting too much stress on myself. So that’s, that can happen. You know, again, maybe it’s, it can also show up where you’re doing. Yeah, you’re doing like extra work maybe beyond the scope of what you originally signed up to do without charging extra for that. I, I had a quote in, or I had a little clause in my contract when I would, when I was working with copywriting clients, I did put that in to say, if this goes beyond the, the scope, then we’re going to have to, I’m going to have to charge you extra. So I did learn that lesson also. It’s avoiding difficult conversations, perhaps not even, you know, realizing that you’ve got a client that is just not a joy to work with, let’s put it that way. A client who is draining your energy and, and it’s just not worth it. And, and I’ll again, I’ll share an example from when I was a copyright. Well, I’ll do copywriting and also coaching. So. But early on in my copywriting career, I had a lovely gentleman who wanted my help to help him website to be able to up there on Google, who wanted me to help him promote his business. And I get. And he would, you know, ask me to meet in person over coffee and we would strategize and then he wouldn’t implement what I recommended. And it really started to be extremely frustrating with me, for me, I should say, because, you know, I was trying to be a nice person and trying to help him, you know, and give him all these great ideas. And then he was taking me away from other clients because I had to go. I had to drive somewhere and meet him in person. And so finally I just had to let him go. And then I’ve also had in coaching options or situations where I was, I was working with a client who again, just rejected everything that I was. Every recommendation, she’s like, oh, I’ve tried that. Oh, no, that doesn’t work. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. And as I was on, and this was, I was on a phone call with Her. And even just now I’m remembering this, it was like my stomach started to like really tighten up in a knot and I, it just was, I was just really feeling like, ah, this, this, this isn’t working. So I, I had to let her go. I had to send her off to. I gave her a couple of recommendations of some other people that she might be able to work with and you know, and said, you know, I just, I’m sorry, obviously we’re not a good fit. You know, I, I would love to be able to help you, but for whatever reason, we’re just not a good fit. And, and that’s what you have to do. That’s, that’s the process of starting to set boundaries for yourself because you, you really need to start taking care of yourself. Setting boundaries is self care and it’s self love. You can’t serve your other clients if you are constantly trying to please everybody. And then, and then you are at, at the, at your expense because then you are. It’s a recipe for burnout. So you have to learn how to say no. My very first, My very first. Well, maybe not my first, okay, my sec. My very first paying client because I had, I had some barter clients, but my very first paying client and the very first success I ever had with SEO copywriting and getting somebody’s website up onto the first PA page of Google. There were life coaches and I first became acquainted with them through a presentation they were giving where they said no is a complete sentence. And I loved that. So no is a complete sentence. You are allowed to say no gracefully. I, you know, you want to be able to do that, but to set boundaries for yourself. So one of the advantages of being more mature, shall we say, you know, you know, working with a lot of. I work with a lot of women entrepreneurs who are over 50 and I think is that, you know, you have a lot of life experience that you bring to the table. And again, sometimes transitions happen that throw us for a loop. Like I mentioned the death of my sister. Maybe you wind up getting divorced or something like that and it can really stir things up and knock you off your game. But when you can get back on there, you do have this wealth of experience and knowledge that you can tap into. And also, I think as you get older, you also realize that you’re not going to finally, you do get to a point where you realize you’re not going to please everybody. And that’s okay. Because as entrepreneurs, that’s a lesson we have to learn. There’s Going to be a lot of no’s along the way and you have to learn how to be okay with that. And I know as a people pleaser, it can be challenging to do that. So because you, you want to be able to serve clients. And, and, and I know, I’m thinking too, I’m thinking back to this is years ago when I was at a networking event and there was a woman who sell, who sold skin products. And you know, they asked who, who is her, you know, who’s her ideal client? She’s like, well, anybody with skin. Like, well, yes, and it needs to be more defined than that because anybody with skin doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re going to have the money to buy your products. You really, you do, you don’t necessarily need to niche down totally into like a really, really small category, but you do need to define it a bit and come up with an idea of who is your ideal client that you want to work with. And this is something that I’ve been working on for for a while. And, and it also evolves with time, over time, because as human beings, because we are human beings first and then we’re a business owner, we evolve and, and things we can, we can grow. Well, we do, we do. We grow and we change and we evolve. And what worked in the past may not work now. And what we wanted to do in the past may not be what we want to do now. Because again, I realized after my sister passed that even though I love copywriting and I still love to write for clients, I have had clients who I’ve done email marketing for or things like that, and I still love, enjoy doing that. And I was feeling this pull to do this deeper work, to really be able to serve my clients in a, in a deeper way. And that’s where now I use Aligned to. Shine Academy is one example of that. Because now I am teaching what I call the LOVE method, or L O V E method, which LOVE is an acronym. And I’ve talked about this on the podcast before. So it’s, it really is about helping. I want to be able to help, help women to be able to just embrace their divinity, you know, to realize that you are an amazing person who is worthy of all of the wonderful things that you want to achieve in life. And I know I’m getting, I’m sort of straying a little bit here from, from where I started, but I just, I’m passionate about this. I really, I really am. So I’m gonna share with you some tactics because I did promise that of how to be able to really market yourself authentically. And I think right now might be a good time to actually, we interrupt this program now to, to share modality that has helped me to be able to set boundaries more effectively, to really release this people pleasing tendency that I grew up with. And, and it really does stem from childhood. It was a, it was a tactic that I used growing up because I wanted to make peace in my family and not, and not have, you know, get into arguments or something with my parents because I saw how my older siblings did not always get along, shall we say. And so I was like, okay, I’m learning a lesson because they were, they were older than me and so growing up, I’m like, okay, I need to do a different tactic here. I’m going to see if I can just be quiet and go with the flow and try to not make waves. And then that continued as an adult to my detriment. So what I want to do right now with you is to share a light language transmission for you. And if you are new to the podcast and you don’t know what that is, I’m going to just give a, just a short version of it. It’s essentially a, it’s a sound healing modality. I share a. I will be speaking and, or singing language that your left side of your brain is not going to understand. But it’s not meant for that. It’s meant for your soul. It’s meant for your heart because it speaks directly to that and because you’re also listening to sound waves, in a sense. Sound waves are very powerful, Especially, especially the song. There’s, there’s lots of studies that have shown the positive impact of certain music. It affects our brain waves. It affects, it can, you know, people who have Alzheimer’s disease, for instance, or dementia, if they hear like an old song that they grew up with, it’s like they suddenly start coming back to life again even though they have been maybe unresponsive or just, you know, stuck. Stuck and not, not being able to communicate very well. But it’s like they hear a familiar song and, and suddenly they come alive again. So I invite you to pause this recording, especially if you are listening to it while you’re driving, because you’re, you’re going to want to be able to be someplace where you can sit down, put your feet on the ground, close your eyes ideally, because that way you can really just absorb what I’m going to be sharing with you and set the intention. And this is the Intention that I set as well is I set the intention that the message that you’re going to receive will help to clear any blocks for you that are keeping you from speaking your own truth and allow and, and help give you the confidence to set those boundaries maybe in your life and your business or both, or. That was both or one or the other where you might be having some issues and to, and to really allow that to help you. So again, like I say, I invite you to just sit back for a moment, take a deep breath, relax, Take a deep breath, let it out and don’t worry about what you’re hearing. Like I said, don’t try to follow it necessarily. It might even sound familiar to you. I’ve had clients who say that it sounds familiar, but again, don’t. Just, just, just take it in and just hold that whatever, whatever comes through is for your soul’s highest good. That’s, that’s what I’m, I’m intending and that’s what I want to intend for you as well. Sako Hanako Kayokiya well, Monarchy well. So I hope you received that with the, with the love that was intended. So now that we’ve had our little clearing break and, and allowing some of that to, to come through you and to clear away maybe whatever is perhaps keeping you stuck in patterns that don’t serve you. Let’s talk about how to market with integrity, how to protect yourself, how to set up those boundaries. So as I mentioned before, it really starts with learning how to value yourself. And this is self care. And I’m hoping that there’s like loud music going on outside of my window. That’s why I’m getting a little distracted and I’m hoping it’s not being picked up on this microphone because that would not be cool. Well, anyway, so you can think of marketing as an act of love. You need to come at it from that frame. Frame of reference. Yeah, there we go. I was trying to say frame, frame, point, which is not a word. I think I’m trying to do viewpoint and framework, putting them together. Yeah, frame, point. There we go. I coined a new lord today because when you come from, from an act of desperation, that scarcity feeling that, you know, you’ve got to be able to please people no matter what they want. You want to be able to serve everybody you’re not serving. And in fact, you’re gonna frankly chase away the people that really you’re meant to serve. So you want to be able to love yourself enough to value yourself and to let Go of whatever this idea you have that you have to do whatever it takes to be able to, to get clients. And that’s another thing. It’s like get clients. We don’t want to get clients. We want to attract. We want to be able to be of service so that someone will want to work with us. And, and setting boundaries is a really good way to do that because you set expectations at the beginning of your interaction with someone so that they, they know what to expect. And, and frankly, people respect you more. They will respect you more when you do set those boundaries. And then you’re going to attract perhaps fewer clients, but they may be much better aligned clients, clients that you’re going to love to work with as opposed to clients who drain your energy. Like I mentioned earlier, we want to be able to attract clients who are going to fill us up, who are going to light us up, who, who are going to take action on what we, what we are recommending they do. And that’s gonna, gonna help you. So the other aspect of let’s, well, let’s talk about content creation when it comes to setting boundaries. So you, when you’re creating content to share on social media, for instance, or maybe you have a blog either on your website, or maybe you’re using substack, that’s, you know, or some of these other platforms that are out there know for again, protecting your boundaries is. You don’t have to give everyone your whole story. There’s an expression sharing from your scars, but not your wounds. And I know I’ve heard this with other people, like for instance, in public speaking realm that you don’t want to, you know, spew everything that happened to you because you can really bring an audience down and you can bring a reader down as well by, you know, going through every, you know, horrible tragedy perhaps that you’ve gone through. Instead, you want to be able to share from a place of what’s, what you’ve been able to, how you’ve been, how you’ve overcome that. You know, get to like I, you know, I mentioned that yes, I experienced the loss of a sister, but I don’t go into all of the gory details of, of, you know, all of all of it that I, you know, that I dealt with, with being a caregiver and et cetera, et cetera. I just say, oh yeah, you know, so I had the loss of a sister and that kind of threw me for a loop and I had to reevaluate what it was I wanted to do. And you can do the same thing. And that’s, that’s setting a boundary so that you are. You’re sharing. You want to be able to inspire. You want to. You want to inspire your prospect. You want to be able to give them enough of the backstory so that they can relate to you, because that’s important. You want to be able to have them relate to you, but then show them what’s possible and say, this is what, you know, I overcame, and now I’m able to do xyz. And then they can say, oh, wow, well, maybe they can help me do XYZ as well, because I’m in that area of my life where I need, I need what they’re selling, you know, and, and so keeping that as, as an idea of what to do, I think is so important. And I think I’ve talked about this maybe even in my last episode. I don’t remember now, but. Or, or it might have been in a. Something else I was sharing. But when you get ready to create content, do it from a place where you are in a higher vibe state. Because even you know, the words that you. You write as well as what you speak, they all are, contain energy. And so if you are wanting to attract ideal clients, then be attractive. And I don’t mean, you know, how you look, but be attractive as a, As a, as a magnet. Be. Be in that higher vibe state where you’re feeling happy and excited about what you’re doing and how you want to be able to be of service to people. And when you start creating content from that frame point, then your content is going to be much more magnetic and you are going to get responses to it. And just case in point, I’ve been. In addition to the podcast, I’ve also been doing something I call Wisdom Wednesdays, where I record a short, short video, and I use the Daily Word from Unity as my inspiration for that. That day’s Daily Word is the topic that I share. And I’ve been posting this on LinkedIn and on Facebook. Excuse me, what? Had a cough. Didn’t want that on there. And I really, I mean, I, I love this podcast. Don’t get me, don’t get me wrong. So I get, you know, really excited about sharing on the podcast, but I really love doing these little mini recordings as well. And the other, I think, was a couple weeks ago, one of my friends actually caught it on Facebook and she’s like, oh, my gosh, you’re, like, just so alive. And. And I forget exactly. I, I clipped what, what the comment Was, but yeah, I just get really energized and, and everything just flows and, and that’s what I, I strive to do on the podcast as well. You know, I have, I have notes and, and things that, that I do, but I also want to, I want to be, I want to be a light in the world. That’s part of my, that’s my, my purpose. And so I strive to, to be that. I don’t come on here and do the podcast like this and it’s like, yeah, here’s what you need to do. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I know if you’re, you’re watching this, you could tell immediately my energy went down, but I’m sure even listening to it, you can hear the difference between this as opposed to when I’m talking and I’m sm, your, your voice, the frequency, the pitch, the pitch. That’s it. The pitch of your voice, or the pitch of my voice at least rises. So it’s, I’m speaking in a higher register when I’m smiling as opposed to when I’m like this. And then it’s more, yeah, it’s a lower frequency. It’s not happy. And I don’t even enjoy speaking this way. Blah. So I’m gonna stop that. I don’t want to do that anymore. It’s icky. Okay, okay, so we got that. Now let’s see, what else do I want to talk about? Okay, so more boundary tips. How to set boundaries for yourself in sales conversations. So one of the things that you could do is start pre qualifying people and ask, ask questions up front and, and get to see if this really is somebody that you want to work with because it may be in asking certain questions that you realize, yeah, I’m not sure we’re going to be a good fit. And, and here’s the thing, you get to choose. And I know sometimes, again, let’s say that perhaps you’re maybe you’re just starting out in business or you’ve just decided to pivot and you’re going a different direction and you, you want to be able to, to attract more clients. And it may feel like, oh, I, I want to be able to serve people. I, I, I don’t want to reject someone. And here’s the thing though, it’s a magical thing when you set boundaries for yourself about who you want to work with. It opens up space for the people you’re meant to work with. See, because if you spend too much time dealing with all these other people who really are not aligned with you then the people you want to work with, you’re too busy for them and they’re going to go find somebody else. And I was going to make another point, but I’m just going to stick with that one. Yeah, they’re, they’re going to go elsewhere. So it’s so important to be okay with not serving everyone, be okay with working with the clients that align with you. The more you do that and the more you are putting out content that really aligns with you and helping serving people who really are aligned with you. Well, guess what? If you’re helping them, then they’re going to become a referral partner for you, a referral source. They’re going to rave about you to other people and then you’re going to attract more clients. Isn’t that beautiful the way that works? I think so. I think so. And also, you know, you’ve got to learn how to be able to handle objections without desperation. You know, I talked about that a little bit at the beginning. And because people are going to, you know, what are the common objections? You know, I don’t have time or I don’t have enough money or I’ve got to, I gotta check with my partner about this. There’s all kinds of objections that people will have. And so before you even get on the sales call, you need to know how you’re going to handle those. And I’m not going to get into all that right now. There’s lots of resources out there for you. And I probably even interviewed some people on the podcast in the past who are sales experts who can give you some tips on that. So you want to be prepared and say, okay, if someone comes up to me with, you know, the money issue or the time issue, how can I handle that? And again, one of the best ways is to really paint a picture for them of what’s going to happen if six months down the road they don’t do this, or a year down the road, are they going to be in the same place? And also use your intuition as well, because maybe you’re in a position where, you know what? I am willing to serve this person at a lower price. For instance, let’s say normally you would charge $5,000 a month for coaching and you really like this person and you really feel that you can help them, and they really are seem to be very amenable and to feedback and to be able to take action, then you’re going to have to trust your gut a little bit and say, well, you know, maybe I can Offer them a smaller package, let’s say, or so that it’s maybe just offer them, okay, how about we just work together for three months as opposed to six months right now and you just try it out for that amount of time, something like that. You, you can come up with ways to be able to do this. And the other one other thing is to, when you’re following up, you, you want to follow up consistently. But don’t be overly pushy because again, you don’t want to, you don’t want to seem desperate, let’s put it that way. You don’t want to seem desperate. So think about what, what you can offer someone. Figure out your own pricing that is going to land with you, that is going to be comfortable for you to charge. Maybe a little bit of a stretch so you’re not underpricing yourself. And, and again, set boundaries of that. You don’t have to respond to everything. You want to set limits. Oh, here’s a good one. Set limits for how often you’re going to be even marketing yourself on social media every day or however, or however often you’re going to do that. Set yourself up a time frame and say, okay, because social media can be a real, not only a time suck, but it can also be an energy suck. There’s so much negativity out there. So set yourself a timer and say, okay, I’m going to be on this platform for 15 minutes a day. I’m going to be on that platform for 20 minutes a day. And even choose the platforms where your ideal clients hang out. You don’t have to be every place you want to be, where your prospects are active and that’s where you want to spend your time anyway. And if you find that you are getting like, say in your newsfeed stuff that is coming up that just is threatening to drag you down, guess what? You cannot follow those people. You can unfollow, you can exit out whatever you. Again, you are in control. You get to choose. So choose wisely. Choose. Choose the people who light you up. And I know then it gets into algorithms that found you wind up only seeing that stuff. And in this case it might not be so bad because especially if you’re using these platforms for business in particular. So let’s see, I’ve got like all of these notes, but I feel like I’ve already talked about a lot of this stuff already, so I think I’m going to summarize. I think we’re going to move into a summary here because I think we I think I’ve covered enough and if I haven’t, if you missed out on something or felt that I missed out on something, let me know, please. I would love to, I would love to know. You can. And I, I just realized I didn’t do any of my lovely banners today. But, but definitely you can, you can contact me. I’m on LinkedIn at Gloria Grace Rand. I’m on YouTube. You can reach out to me on my website. You can. Even if you want to actually really have a chat with me, it’s not, not a sales call or anything like that, but let’s just chat. You can go to EngageWithGloria.com that take right to my calendar and you can set up an appointment so you know, I’m happy, happy to help and answer questions. So let’s see. Okay, so what’s our key takeaways I, I hope that you’ve gotten from today is that boundaries are an act of self care. It really is. It’s an act of self care. It’s an act of self love. Setting boundaries protects you. Your life experience is actually your competitive advantage. So tap into that. Don’t be afraid to tap into that. And know that if you are going through a particular life transition, let’s say something happens and that throws you for a loop, it’s okay to give yourself the grace to put a pause on marketing for a little bit. Know that you are worth it. You’re worth it. It’s important to, to take that time to see what is it I want to do going forward? How do I want to best serve people? Because it may be that you decide to change things up a little bit and that’s okay. I, it’s, it’s so important to give that. A couple years ago I, I separated from my husband and, and it took a couple years for me to really start finding my footing. I was trying different things and you know, again sort of seeing what’s going to stick. You know, throwing dirt to the wall. And it’s like been in this last year that I really feel like I’ve come up for air and I’m happy and I’m attracting opportunities. That’s what happens when you are taking care of yourself and you really are establishing boundaries. Then you become much more aware. You’re putting out this really good energy and people feel that and respond to it and you attract opportunities. So. Yeah. Okay, so I’m, I have a challenge for you today before I close out is to figure out what’s one boundary that you could actually implement in your business this week and, and then journal to track how it, how, what the response is and how, how is it serving you. So take a look at that. So that, that could be something, you know, it might be something as simple as setting the timer and saying, okay, I’m only going to be on social media for this many minutes or I’m only going to do emails. I’m only gonna, I’m only gonna look at my emails at the end of the day, you know, instead of looking at. Or maybe it’s silencing your phone. I’ve gotten into the habit of silencing my phone, you know, and I’ll check was like a text or a phone call when I’m taking a break from my work, but I don’t have it constantly, you know, dinging or buzzing me and interrupting my flow. So that’s a boundary, that’s an example of a boundary that you might want to set. And remember that you’re not too much, you’re not too old, you’re not too late, you are exactly who your ideal clients need. So own that, own your value. It’s so important. And if you would like to ever have a private session with me of light language, if you, if you really enjoyed listening to that earlier today, I offer a free private session, a short one, a 15 minute short one. So we can work on specifically whatever your issue is. And you can go to bitly forward slash capital L, capital L. So two Ls for light language, capital T and then lowercase rial. So it’s ll trial and you can experience a free 15 minute session. I do these over zoom. So I will send you a zoom link when you sign up for that. And, and so I can work with you wherever you are, you know, wherever you are in the world, because I know I have people who are listening to this in all sorts of different countries. So as long as you speak English though, I am, I am studying Hungarian, but I’m not fluent. And I used to know Spanish, but again, not fluent. Okay, so again, make sure that you are subscribed and next week I hope you’ll tune in because we’ve got a fabulous interview with Craig Perra and he is the founder of the Mindful Habit System. And we’re going to talk about how self leadership can transform your emotional wounds into powerful catalysts for personal growth. So I hope you will tune in for that and again be subscribed on your favorite podcast platform or subscribe to us on YouTube. And until next time, I encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.

If you think the idea of harnessing goddess energy to achieve financial abundance seems too “out there,” I invite you to keep an open mind while listening to this episode. Today’s guest believes it’s time to bridge the gap between spirituality and money. We dive deep into why many of us struggle to reconcile our spiritual beliefs with financial abundance, and how shifting this perspective can lead to profound personal and professional growth. Show Notes | Transcript “It’s fun to work with goddess energy. (The Goddess) Lakshmi calls for us to be balanced around giving and receiving, and to value ourselves, and that’s hugely important.” – Mikelann Valterra Financial therapist and master money coach Mikelann Valterra joins me to explain how treating money as part of your spiritual journey can transform both your business and your relationship with wealth. Together, we unpack the concept of “noble poverty” and why it’s crucial to release this limiting belief to fully embrace your potential for abundance. Discover how to: Reframe your relationship with money as a spiritual practice Overcome the “money fog” that keeps you from financial clarity Align your spending habits with your deepest values Embrace abundance without compromising your spiritual integrity Key insights include: The importance of addressing emotional and mental toxicity around money How to beautify your relationship with money through simple, practical steps The power of seeking positive money role models to shift your perspective Why simplifying your financial accounts can lead to greater peace and clarity Mikelann also introduces us to the concept of financial therapy and shares how treating money as a sacred tool can help us live our best life and live out our values.  Whether you’re a spiritual entrepreneur struggling to price your services or simply looking to create a more conscious connection with your finances, this conversation offers valuable insights on integrating money into your spiritual practice. Tune in to start your journey towards a more abundant, aligned, and purposeful life! Connect with Mikelann Website: seattlemoneycoach.com Resources: Join the Soulful Women’s Network here Receive daily inspirational email messages: bit.ly/LoveLightNotes Need support? Go to engagewithgloria.com to schedule a call. Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Gloria Grace Rand Namaste. If you’ve been keeping your bank account and your spiritual practice in kind of separate boxes, you may want to rethink that strategy, especially after you listen to today’s episode because our guest is going to explain why treating money as part of part of your spiritual journey can actually transform both your business and your relationship with wealth. And I think anything we can do to enhance that is a good thing. So first, though, before I bring her on, because I know it’s going to be amazing, I do want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if this is your first time joining us. I am Gloria Grace, the founder of Align to Shine Academy, and I work with spiritually minded women entrepreneurs to break free from self doubt so they can step into their highest potential. And part of that is going to be, you know, owning our relationship with wealth. So let me tell you about today’s guest. Her name is Mikelann Valterra and she’s an author, a speaker, a financial therapist, and master money coach. And I just got struck by that financial therapist. I’m going to ask her about that. That’s an interesting way to look at things. We’ve had yoga therapists on the show before now. I don’t think I’ve had a financial therapist, but anyway, she helps women rise above the money fog, transform their relationship with money, and design their ideal life. And I’m all about that. So let’s bring her on now. And I want to welcome you, Mikelann, to Live Love Engage. Mikelann Valterra I am so happy to be here, Grace. Thank you. I love listening to your show. It’s very fun to be here. Gloria Grace Rand Well, thank you. I appreciate that. And I think before I want to, I know I want to dive into, like, why money and spirituality are separate, but I won’t really. I’m intrigued because that, it’s like I have, I’d read your bio a couple times, but it was like, for today, for whatever reason, I must be in that zone. Financial therapy. What? Why do you call yourself that? Mikelann Valterra What is that? Yeah, well, so I’ll back up and put it in the context of money coaching. So I have been a money coach for 25, five years, believe it or not, and which is a crazy amount of time given that coaching has been around, maybe not a long time. And many people nowadays talk about money coaching, but I was one of the first in the country to get into money coaching. And so it used to be that people would see financial planner if they had questions on investments, maybe a credit counselor if they were struggling with debt. But the Truth is, Grace, most of us have both. You know, we want to build net worth. We don’t want to go into credit card debt. And neither of those fields is particularly adept at the emotional side of money. And so, you know, we need both. So money coaches. Absolutely. Look at, you know. Yes. How do you plan and track money and how do you create a cash flow plan so that you feel totally in control of your money? And, you know, all these wonderful things that we may tiptoe around a little bit today, and few things are as emotional as money. You know, anyone says that money is not emotional, I think is, is a robot. Right. So, you know, financial therapy is looking at the emotional and psychological side of money. And what is the impact of our relationship to money on our life? What is our personal money personality type? What are our motivations around money that impact what we do around money? And you know, a lot of your listeners might be more familiar with the term money mindset. Right. What is your money mindset, which is just a newer, more modern way of talking about your personal financial psychology. And what we think about money has a huge impact on what we do with money. It’s not just about learn what to do. What we think and believe has a massive impact on our relationship to money. And it’s going to come out in, in what we’re talking about today, which is spirituality and money. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, it’s, this is a subject that really hits home with me. In fact, I was actually having a discussion with a friend not too, not too long ago today about, about this, and it was sort of bringing up some stuff. Even though I’ve done a lot of work around this subject, there’s always still layers to be unpacked and, and still some, you know, beliefs and things that are under the surface. So we’ll probably get to that in a little bit. But let’s, let’s, let’s dive into why is it that we feel that money and spirituality, I guess, why are they separate? Maybe even why? I think a lot of people feel that they really need to be separate. Mikelann Valterra Yeah. Boy, that is such a great question. A great place to start. And it’s also, it’s also a complicated one. Right. So many people I know, like my clients, like yours, are very, very spiritually minded. And so sometimes there’s this feeling of is money going to taint the process? Right. If I bring up money, does that hurt my ability to truly help people? And so that, that can be a piece of it, which would be, you know, interesting to dig into. But, but I also think that for as much as people talk about holism and holistic being, we still treat money very, very separate. You know, we. We do talk a lot about, you know, spirit versus matter, and we so want to live lives that are more connected and more holistic. But the reality is so many of us put money on the material side. And because we see money as so, so material and of this world, we think that anything having to do with money will hurt or taint or cause harm to the spiritual world. And even yet, isn’t it interesting, Grace? I mean, we, we give so much thought to our spiritual natures. Why do we want to separate money? You know, we want our relationship to money to help us grow spiritually, but we tend to ignore it when it comes to anything having to do with looking at our spiritual lives. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. And we tend to forget. And this is something I’ve learned in working with actually different money coaches and things over the years, is that, you know, we call money currency, which is related to energy. So it’s not really material as you’re talking about, is it? It’s really energy. So how can, you know, how can, can that help us to, you know, start to be able to reframe our relationship with money if we can start really owning that possibility that, that money is just this energy tool that’s out there. Mikelann Valterra 100 percent. Yeah, 100 percent. I mean, money. I mean, you’re right. Money is energy, and we can do anything with money. And, you know, it was interesting. I was talking to someone earlier today. Money makes you more of who you already are, you know, so if you’re a kind and wonderful generous person and you win the lottery, you’re going to become more generous. If you weren’t a very nice person and you win the lottery, well, guess what? That’s going to magnify that. So money can magnify who you already are. So it’s not about the money. It’s about, you know, who am I? What are my values? And the more you dig into your relationship to money, the more you can start to ask, how can I use money to live out my values? How can I use money to support my spiritual practice in the world? Right. And we can see it in a lot of different ways. But I’m a huge advocate for. Let’s talk about it, because so many of us are in a money fog and we’re not clear about money. And so we’re not talking about living out according to our values when it comes to our spending. So we may see ourselves as very spiritual. People, but we’re unconscious in this huge other arena called money. And you know, we want to bring the beauty of spirituality into our pocketbook. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, and I, and I love that. Thinking of it as magnetizing who we already are. I like that, you know, thinking about it because, because I do know that especially, you know, a lot of people who are a lot of small business owners who are in more of a spiritual profession, you know, a lot of healers or massage therapists and things like that, you know, they, they feel like they can’t, they don’t want to charge a lot of money because they want to be able to help everybody, you know, forgetting sometimes to remember that they have bills to pay as well. And, and it’s important to be able to. Again, you know, think of it as an energy exchange between people. So you have to be able to do that. So how can we start coming up with better ways to be able to shift these views around money that are really harming us more than they’re helping us? Mikelann Valterra Boy, that’s a good question. And I would even take it back. One, because you just brought up a lot of really, really something really important. I would just call up to mind this notion of noble poverty because you’re describing some of the people that you, you know, you help. And some of your listeners are probably tired of being caught in noble poverty, which, you know, it’s the belief that there’s virtue in not having money. And so, you know, whenever we feel greed come up in us and we worry that, well, if I charge more, that would make me greedy. If I do X, Y and Z, that would make me greedy. So whenever, so greed is a signpost in ourselves that we’re struggling with noble poverty, that we feel that there’s somehow virtue in not having money. And, and yet, you know, like you brought up grace, money is, is about energy. And so we’re creating a very uneven relationship when we give and give and give and we don’t receive, receive, receive. And you know, I call it the, the receiving valve, if you will, that we’re giving and giving, but it’s almost like the receiving valve gets stuck in one direction where we’re over givers, you know, and, and I know all your listeners know this, but it’s not healthy to be an over giver. It’s not healthy to go into different levels of, of martyrdom and self-sacrifice. Yeah, we, we know that we would never recommend our family do that, our friends do that, our children do that. Right. But do we feel ultimately that we deserve to receive. And that’s where all this gets really deep about the know, self-worth, which is not equally net worth, that gets into its own little rabbit hole there. Gloria Grace Rand Right. Mikelann Valterra You know, I mean, your self worth is not dependent on money, you know. And then, you know what, what you just asked, Grace is, well, great. I bet all the listeners are going, yes, absolutely. I get it. What do you do, you know, how do you start shifting? Gloria Grace Rand Right, right. Because it’s like you can know it up here in your head, but. But to get that message to your heart, I think is the really important thing because I think there’s a disconnect there. Our heart is where our emotions are. And frankly, this is, you know, really. This is really what we think by it really is our heart. And they’ve even said, you know, we actually have seriously, you know, neurons and things in our heart. And it’s really maybe our heart that’s actually leading us more than we think our brain is. So. Yeah. So how can we do this? Yeah. Mikelann Valterra Yeah. Oh, no, I love that. I was just thinking, I mean, this little bit off the topic, but I know when I started meditating through my heart as opposed to my head, it opened me up in a much deeper, more profound way. Right. So it’s like, how do we live through our heart, not just our head. Gloria Grace Rand Right. Mikelann Valterra Plus, while still honoring all parts of us? Yeah, there’s probably. Well, there’s probably 10 different things, but, you know, a couple things that I would throw out is I think it really helps people to get in touch with their money story. And what I mean by that is, what was money like for you when you were a kid growing up and really getting clear that we’re not these adults that sprang out of nowhere around money now have all these feelings around money? You know, we feel stressed and anxious sometimes about money, and we’re in a money fog because of how we were raised. You know, if we grew up, for example, hearing our parents fight about money, or we grew up in a family that didn’t have enough money, it’s important to talk about this and process this, like psychotherapeutically, really talk about our history around money because it helps us understand why as adults we carry our current stress and anxiety. And it also helps to dissolve it when we see, you know, where it came from. I would say that another really powerful practice is, I call it tuning and retuning your radar. And what I mean by that, Grace, is that when people have a lot of negativity around money, they tend to find stories in the news and people and examples that support a negative view around money, like, yep, I told you so. That person, of course, did this horrible negative evil, like of course, all these evil CEOs or all the different things. And so if you want to shift and retune your relationship with money, then I would challenge you to deliberately look for positive money role models. You know, and one way to go about it is say, okay, what do you value? You know, what do you value? And then who’s funding what is important to you? And you know, a lot of times this is not on the front page of the paper, so we’ve got to look deeper to see who’s funding my beliefs. You know, if you really believe in, you know, third world economic development for women, let’s say that’s your passion. There are wealthy people that are putting a lot of money behind that vision and around that, that value and really tuning into that helps you shift your feelings around. All people are greedy and insensitive and feel superior, Right? Because we want to really start feeling positive about money. If you believe that wealthy people are greedy, insensitive and feel superior to other people, you’ll never allow yourself to have wealth. You know, why would you allow yourself to become that which you despise? Right. So it’s, it’s really important to look actively for really positive role models and people that are doing things that you respect and love around money. Gloria Grace Rand I love that. That is such great advice. And I’ve not heard that before at all. And that makes so much sense because I know I, I was raised, you know, God, God rest her soul. I love my mom, but she really did have negative views around, you know, rich people. She know, she was a union worker and, and her brother wasn’t an entrepreneur that she did not get a whole get along with and frankly thought she was, you know, he was cheating her out of, you know, the inheritance from their mother and things like that. And so, you know, listening to a lot of this stuff and, and like I said, I have worked through a lot of this. And you know, something that I teach is called the love method, which part of it is the O in love is open your heart to receive, you know, the importance of being able to do that. But there’s still, it’s ingrained. And I know that I have to continue to work on that because it’s still just when I think I have it handled, it’s like something will come up and it’s like, odd nerve. Got to work on a little bit more. And, and is that something Maybe that you find when you’re. You’re working with clients that, you know, it’s like that happens. Mikelann Valterra Yeah. I actually, I love that you. That. I mean, it’s so great the way that you just described that, because that’s as real as it gets. I think that, that people have a misperception that if they work on, you know, fill in the blank, their, let’s just say, their relationship to money, and they’ll figure out, ah, that’s why I feel the way that I feel. And it’ll heal and go away forever. But. But that’s not who we are as humans. You know, it’s. It’s more the onion method. We. We unwrap layers and we heal layers. And then we come to another layer, and then we come to another layer and life brings us many situations that allow us to look at, oh, what is coming up in me. I think that’s a new thing for me to look at, address, heal, talk about. And you know, we’re complicated. Right. It’s very rare that I talk to someone, Grace, that has a boring money story. Right? It’s very rare. I think we all wish we had a boring money story. Everything went according to plan and I had the perfect parents who taught me all about money, and now everything is proceeding just, you know. Right. I’ve never met that person. Right. So we all have these crazy curveballs and both good and bad. And so, you know, part of it is, is. Is claiming that and saying, yep, that’s true. That’s. That’s life. And I get to talk about it. I don’t have to pretend that it didn’t have an effect on me. It had a big effect on me. Right. And now I’m, I’m on the other side looking at that and healing. But we, we tend to put money in a funny box. We process fearlessly. So many subjects. You know, I know your listeners are well therapized. Right. They have done copious amounts of wonderful, wonderful therapy and money gets missed in the psychotherapeutic process. It is not well addressed in therapy. And there’s a lot of reasons for that. Part of it is therapists have a very conflicted relationship themselves with money, you know, and how I feel about charging people for helping them and so on and so forth. Right. But we get to talk about this and it’s, it’s real, it’s normal, and we’re all trying to heal and, and, you know, up level and feel better and better and better because ultimately we want Money to be a sacred tool to live our best life and live out our values. And the more that we can process it, and I would also say the more that we can simplify it because that’s a, that’s another piece of the puzzle, I think. Grace, people have complicated a lot of stuff around money that makes it harder to get clear about what we’re talking about. And that’s, you know, that’s another piece. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, well, we’re kind of been talking a lot about sort of this negative impact. Well, let’s, let’s flip it around a little bit and talk about abundance. And so how can we start maybe cultivating some different practices that could help us to start having this better relationship with money? Mikelann Valterra I love it. So here’s what’s fun about abundance that I always have to say. You know, abundance is both an inner state and an outer state. And you know that better than anyone. But sometimes people lose sight of that and they think abundance is only about the outer material, material world. Most important thing about abundance is this inner felt state of abundance. You know, this is why gratitude practice is so important and you know, feeling abundant on the inside and, and eventually this expresses in various ways on the outside. But, you know, in terms of abundance practices, I, I would offer three. So one is my vote is we find ways to beautify your money. And so I would start with beautifying your wallet. And that may sound funny, we’re talking about spirituality and money. But if you beautify your wallet, I literally mean clean it out, get rid of all of the garbage. How about have a wallet you love? How about have a wallet that’s beautiful. If we’re going to honor money and honor the flow of money in and out of our lives, you know, wallet is a symbol of that. And so you want to feel so warm and wonderful when you pull out your wallet. And you also don’t want it crammed full of stuff because it’s a way of not honoring flow. And you want to honor flow. And a wallet is a symbol of that. Right. I would add a second abundance practice, and that would be to simplify all of your accounts. Because you know what I. What I know, Grace as a money coach is part of why people are in a lot of money fog is they have too many accounts, they have too many credit cards, too many checking accounts, too many savings accounts. There’s a lot of reasons why this happens. But when you simplify your account structure, it’s easier to really dig in and really start shifting your relationship to money. The More accounts you have, the more money fog you’re likely in and the more stress and anxiety you have around money. That’s. That’s the correlation. You really want to simplify things. Gloria Grace Rand Wow. All right, well, that’s two. I think you said three. Do you have one more or what? That’s two. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, yeah. Mikelann Valterra You’re tracking. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Mikelann Valterra So. So the third. Third one I threw in is gonna. In some ways, me may sound like the most practical. Well, I’d like to think they’re all practical and doable. Right. But I would call it the good old reoccurring expense cleanup. So, you know, when I start working with people, we. We go into different levels. You know, there’s the emotional level and the practical level and, you know, all sorts of stuff around many coaching. But at some point we actually look at where is your money going, and a lot of times we see things that we’ve just gone blind to, forgotten about. And there’s a lot of money leaks. And here we are wanting to up level around money and feel great around money. And so for a while, it just takes a little bit of cleanup, a little bit of housekeeping. So listing out all of the things in your bank account and your credit card that are automatically pulling money every month. And it’s a long list. Sometimes it’s, oh, when I signed up for Audible and when I signed up for Pandora and when I signed up for Dropbox, when I signed Better sign. There’s, there’s, there’s what the diet apps and stuff like that. Keep them if you’re using them, of course, but how many of us have subscriptions, online subscriptions that, that we’re not using? And so it just creates this financial clutter, financial drain. It creates a. It’s almost like another layer of anxiety. And so, you know, dedicating two to three weeks to close those goes a long way towards beautifying your money. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, it’s. It is amazing how these things add up. And I would also encourage folks out there because especially, you know, entrepreneurs out there. There’s so many wonderful tools out there that are these AI softwares now and, and, oh, you want to be able to get the paid version because you get a lot more bells and whistles with it. But then if you’re spending, you know, this much on cloud and then you’re spending that much on chat GPT, and then you’re spending this much on this one and that one, that $20 a month starts adding up to a lot. So you need to really, you know, when you’re doing this house cleaning. You know, I would say not only maybe your, your personal, but also look at your business accounts as well and see where there’s something that maybe you can say, okay, am I really using this this much or can I maybe get by with a free one and let it go? Mikelann Valterra Yeah, I’m glad, I’m glad you brought up business because about a third of my practice are business owners. Actually might be even half. You know, and, and like you, they’re, you know, they’re. I have a lot of psychotherapists as clients and you know, lawyers and I mean just you know, all sorts of different people in, in, in private practice and all of this applies to the business side of life as well as the personal, you know, too many accounts and the clutter. And I, I love this idea of beautify your money. Beautify your money. So you just like, you know, you. Yeah, exactly. You go into your online accounts and ah. And it just feels clean and clear and it is seriously correlated to feeling more peaceful around money. And that’s, that is where we’re really moving into that, that spiritual connection around money. Gloria Grace Rand Which just brings me to something that. Yeah. When you’re talking about this beautifying and I think, I wonder if this is also something that, and I, I know I wanted to ask a. This other thing but I’m, I’m just struck with especially and I don’t know what your breakdown with clients male versus female, but I wonder if also some of our hang up around money is because maybe it has more of a masculine energy to it and, and we want to be more feminine and we want to be giving and so that’s where maybe some also we get this little stress I guess around it. What do you think about that? Mikelann Valterra Yeah, yeah, no, I, I think you’re spot on. I, I happen to specialize in working with women so. Yep, you are, you’re singing my song. I mean I do some lovely, lovely male clients. I do. But I specialize in working with women. And money is often seen as masculine and it is seen as a tool of power and control. And you know, women are really in need of healing their relationship to power because we tend to see it as negative as, as bad as power over. But as business owners we actually need a lot of power. We need power to see our vision made manifest in the world. Right. We need like if you asked Mother Teresa, I know she’s not with us anymore but you know, she would score very high as many personality type of quiz of money is power because money we Know, need power to have our vision come forth in the world. But because we see it like you were bringing up as a tool of aggression, a tool of power, a tool of over, you know, masculine, all that stuff. It’s one more reason why we don’t see money as very spiritual. And this is something that we want to shift. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, thank you for that. Because that, yeah, it’s just really start, started to occur to me and I, and I’m thinking that, that, that is also maybe some of what I have not unpacked yet for myself and that I want to start looking at truly. And now I want to continue down the spiritual path because I, I do know, especially for, you know, those out there listening and, and watching who, you know, really get into this and maybe start, you know, talking about a goddess energy you have, you, you know something about this. So, you know, there’s, there’s, I know there’s a goddess called Lakshmi that I think has, has, has. And in fact, I’ve even like seen, I think, you know, YouTube videos and, and things about, you know, listening to, I don’t know, chance or something. So what, what is, what does the Goddess Lakshmi have to do with money? Mikelann Valterra So, yeah, I, in fact, maybe they were my YouTube videos, although I probably, I don’t think I did one on Canteen. But I definitely, this is a, one of my favorite subjects. So I, I, my spirituality is definitely through Raja yoga. Right. So I, I am a daily meditator and I’m very much in yoga, if you will, the path of meditation. And in the Indian tradition, East India, there are many, many wonderful gods and goddesses. And you know, they’re all representations of one God. I know it’s, it’s strange sometimes for Westerners that have a very different monotheistic notion of God, but they all are about the same one God. And so the Goddess Lakshmi is the goddess of abundance and goddess of wealth, but again, abundance and wealth in many, many ways besides just money. Right? I mean, she was the form of God that people would pray to for a millennia to have healthy children and plentiful crops and good fortune in their life. Right? So she’s this super, super powerful, powerful energy that brings so much of this wonderful forms of abundance into our life. And when you look at the stories around Lakshmi and all these, you know, wonderful mythology and just wonderful, wonderful stories, Lakshmi loves beauty and she loves order. And so there’s this, this wonderful particular story where she is trying to give basically what we’d call money, you know, trying to give money to this Very, very poor couple that was desperately in need of some. A little bit of wealth in their life to help them with some issues they were having. And so she enters their house trying to give them money, and she. She doesn’t want to put the money down in a dirty place, and she can’t find a clean place in their house in which to leave them this gift because everything is just so cluttered. So she finally finds one edge of the stove that’s kind of clean, and she, you know, as she kind of comes down from For a great goddessness and cleans the rest of it with, you know, her. The mantle over him and cleans as part of the stove. And that’s where she leaves this amazing gift for them because she loves them so much, you know, so it’s. It’s fun to work with goddess energy. It’s fun to work with a lot of the fascinating mythologies that are out there. There is a version of a goddess of abundance in all of the mythologies. Maybe not all the mythologies, but, you know, in north mythology and in so many, many, you know, in the Greeks, the Romans, it’s wonderful to go into both. Just feminine energy is, again, you know, you know, better than anyone. And claiming that and owning that is just so delicious. And then to combine that with money and abundance is just really powerful. And I. I personally find that it’s healing because, you know, Lakshmi calls for us to be balanced around giving and receiving and to value ourselves, and that’s. That’s hugely important. Gloria Grace Rand Absolutely. And I just want to also let folks know that, you know, again, and this goes back to Western tradition and Western religion and that there’s a lot of, you know, I think, especially among Christians, that it’s, you know. Yeah. That you have to have this. You know, we talked about this noble poverty and thing and that you’re, you know, it’s better to give than receive. However, if I went to. I took a course called Prosperity 4 you that was written by a Unity minister and where she goes through and finds all the wonderful parts in the Bible where talk about abundance and that it is good to have abundance and that God, frankly, wants us to be abundant. God doesn’t want us to be, you know, starving and poor and all this stuff that. Yeah. Somehow has gotten into the zeitgeist. That doesn’t belong there. Mikelann Valterra It’s so true. I mean, I was raised. I consider myself an expanded Catholic. Right. So I. I was raised very, very. I didn’t know anyone that wasn’t Catholic until I went to College. Right. And so then I added on this yoga spirituality on top of my Catholicism. So, you know, who know, who knows what all that says about me. But you’re right. And there’s, you know, you know, there’s these very classic biblical misquotes that, that says, you know, money is the root of all evil. And for all of your beautiful Christian listeners, they know that’s a misquote. It’s, it’s, it’s love of money over pursuit of money, money out of balance and our lives drive that is the root of all evil. Right. So it’s, it’s really so good to be able to, to look at that because, you know, God in, in the Judeo Christian model, 100% wants us to have abundance in all of these, you know, wonderful ways and have this healthy, healthy relationship to, you know, this, this energy, this resource of money. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, yeah. And, and as you said earlier, you know, especially if you do look at it as, you know, how, how, what your values are, if you value being generous to people and that you want to be able to do good in the world, then just think how much more good in the world you could do if you had more money to do it with. You know, take care of yourself and then you can generously share it with others. Mikelann Valterra Exactly. How many of us would love to step deeper and deeper into being a philanthropist. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Mikelann Valterra You know, and, and we want to have greater levels of wealth so that we can put our money where we truly value and help the world. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, absolutely. And, and I’m, I’m, I’m thinking even for myself, it’s like, I think I, well, number one, I want to go back to your idea of looking for role models and then maybe put like, you know, little stickers around me, you know, think like this person, you know, or something like that, so I can start, you know, getting that into my head that it’s okay, it’s okay to be wealthy because look at the great good that this person is doing. And I could do that too. Mikelann Valterra It’s so true. You know, and I have a wide variety of clients and you know, some of my clients come from, from significant wealth. Some do and some don’t. Some have a lot of money, some don’t. But for my clients that have wealth and they want to really feel like they are increasingly a good steward of their wealth, I always encourage them to join a women’s philanthropy group because, you know, having money may, is, can be very isolating. Grace. People are afraid to share with their friends that they have Money. They feel like everyone thinks, oh, if only I had your problems. You know, I mean, it’s different for all of us. Right? But you want to be again, with models of other women that are very clean around their money, that can talk about it, that want to talk about their values around money, that are giving money where they, you know, where they want, where they want to give, and they want to be in fellowship with other women around this. So there’s, there’s lots of ways to, you know, get into this. And, you know, we all want to heal our relationship to money, whether we. Gloria Grace Rand Absolutely. Mikelann Valterra Regardless of how much we have. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah. Oh, so, so awesome. All right, I’m going to shift gears just slightly here because as we’re, we’re running out of time, but I like, I like asking my guests this. So what are you curious about right now? Mikelann Valterra Oh, wow, that’s a good question. I’m like, oh, so many things. I’m like the most curious person on the planet. That just like, question made my brain explode. Yeah. What am I curious about? Oh, my goodness. I, I’m so, I’m curious about so many things. This is, you know, this is a total non sequitur, Grace. But I, I’ve been doing a lot of work on healing stage fright and visibility issues. And so I’m most curious about all things related to being more and more visible in the world and how to achieve that and be more comfortable being visible. And honestly, part of it’s coming from the fact that as I shared with you, I’m a tango dancer. So when I’m not money coaching by day, I dance by night, and I’m struggling with stage fright. And it’s funny because I do so much speaking, Grace. I’m not. Put me in front of a thousand people, no problem. Let’s talk about money, no problem. But put me in my, in my high heel tango shoes and put me on a stage in front of a group, my legs shake. And so I am very curious about how to heal that and how to keep moving into that and how to just become more and more embodied in my own body, in my own journey around visibility as I’ve, you know, become more and more visible, obviously in my career. But why does that have to stop at the door of my personal life? And so that, that’s what I’m curious about right now. Gloria Grace Rand Well, as a, as a former dancer, when I was a kid, well, any. And even up through, through college, I still did ballet, tap, jazz, all that good stuff. I will tell you the. You’re Always going to feel a little bit nervous when you get out there, but if you truly love it, just keep doing it and it will get easier. But you gotta just keep doing because. And I’m sure you probably learned that through public speaking. I bet you were. I bet you were super nervous the first time you had to go in front of a crowd, too, right? It’s true. Mikelann Valterra No, you’re. You’re totally right. And I. I mean, I. I think it’s getting easier, but I never, you know, but then I push it to a new level, right? And then I’m like, oh, my gosh. Where my husband and I are, we’re both ango dancers and we’re looking at competing nationally next year. And it’s just a different level of visibility, Right. I’m like, yeah, you know, so I. I know you’re right. I know you’re right. But that. That’s what I’m most curious about is this, like, visibility that also not. I’m not gonna say transcends the body, but it’s one thing to be visible in the mind and the intellect. And, you know, I’m a writer and I’m a speaker, but to embody visibility is, for me, my leading edge. And that’s where my curiosity is. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, that’s cool. Well, well, and. And as you said, your husband is your dance partner, so I would think, you know, lean on him and just, you know, focus in on the fact that you both are loving what you’re doing and then see if you can tune out the audience. Mikelann Valterra Oh, yeah. Working on it. Working on it. Yeah. I probably put bruises on that man’s arms I’m gripping so hard, so tight. Sometimes, you know, but it is a super wonderful and high and holy thing to do in a relationship. So it’s, it’s wonderful. Gloria Grace Rand Well, good luck to you. I look. Look forward to seeing your name, you know, down the road here as. As being one of those champion tango dancers. Mikelann Valterra Yeah, I like. I’ll send you the video. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, okay, sounds good. All right. Now, I talked about so much, and it’s been amazing and, you know, might even have to have you back again one day. But in the meantime, for those who have been listening and watching and are like, oh, I really want to, like, find out more about her and maybe work with her or something. So how can people contact you and get in touch with you? Mikelann Valterra Thank you for asking that. The best way would be to go to Seattle Money Coach.com. seattle Money Coach.com. I’ve got amazing clients all over the country. But obviously I happen to live in Seattle, so what I would do is I would either grab a free discovery call if people just want to chat with me for a couple of minutes. And I love writing. There’s a wonderful newsletter called Conscious Money that in a wonderful community that I have behind it for people that want to just get a hit of inspiration on some of the stuff that you and I are exploring today if they want to. I don’t, I don’t think I send it out Grace more than probably once a month, but people really enjoy it, so I would subscribe. It’s all on Seattle Money Coach. Gloria Grace Rand All right, very good. Well, I’ll be sure and have that in the show notes for those of you listening. So be sure and check that out. And yeah, take Michael Ann up on that. So thank you so much. Oh, you know what, though? I’m going to ask you one, one last thing. Is there anything else that I didn’t ask you that I should have any other one last point to leave our audience real quick with? Mikelann Valterra No, I think we hit it all. I mean, I just want to encourage people to know that it’s a journey and it is possible to rise above the money fog and it is possible to feel more and more in control of, of your money. And so I say it’s very exciting. Gloria Grace Rand All right, very good. Well, thank you again for being with us. I really appreciate it. And I also want to thank all of you for listening and for watching today. And I hope you hope you’ve received as much value out of it as I did. And I hope you’ve got couple different things. Maybe you jotted down some notes about some action steps that you’re going to take, and if you want to share them with me, I would love for you to do that. And in fact, I’ve got, we’ve got a, a place for you to do that, actually, which is we’ve got a community called the Live Love Engage Podcast community. Go to liveloveengage.com and you can join us. And yeah, I’d love to hear what you have to have to think about this today and, and share. Like I said, whatever. What action steps are you going to take? Because I know what I’m going to do. So until next time, I want to encourage you to go out and live fully, love deeply and engage authentically.