Home-Based Death Care, Family-Led Vigils and the Truth About Child Loss with Bonita Ralph

What if the last thing you'd ever want for someone you love is a viewing at a funeral home?In this episode, I sit down with Bonita Ralph, a death educator, family support practitioner and former Holistic Funeral Director whose work spans home-based death care, infant and child loss, and paediatric palliative care. Bonita's journey began with a simple but profound question on a drive home from holiday: “What if I died? What would happen?” That moment sent her down a rabbit hole into community-led death care, eventually leading her to specialise in extended family-led vigils and the care of babies and children who have died.Bonita shares what she has learned from working with bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents, including the “concentric circles of support” model for knowing who to lean on, and who not to burden, in grief. We talk candidly about invisible infant loss, the myths that still shape what people believe is or isn't possible in after-death care, and why she pushes back when funeral providers say something “can't be done.” Bonita also explains what home-based death care actually looks like, what a shrouded witness cremation involves, and why she believes death education belongs in schools.We also explore her work in paediatric palliative care, where she says the first word that comes to mind is joy, and how holding both heartbreak and joy at once has shaped the way she supports families from diagnosis through to bereavement.Remember; You may not be ready to die, but at least you can be prepared.Take care,CatherineWe'd love to hear from you. Send us a text :-)Death is hard, make death admin easy with the Critical Info Platform. It’s a simple, secure system that helps you prepare and share your legacy, wishes and personal paperwork.It’s packed with prompts, guides and even a To Do List to help you easily gather critical information for a complete end-of-life plan.Leave behind a legacy, not a mess.Sign up now to your free trial at critical info.com.auNo credit card needed. Every Tuesday at 7pm, I host Critical Chat Tuesdays — free, online conversations where you can ask questions or just listen.No pressure. No expectation.Because this isn’t about planning for “someday” — it’s about being ready for whatever life throws your way.Join anytime at criticalinfo.com.au/events MY LOVED ONE HAS DIED, WHAT DO I DO NOW?Our guide, ‘My Loved One Has Died, What Do I Do Now?’ provides practical steps for the hours and days after a loved one's death. Download it here.SUPPORT SERVICESIf you're feeling overwhelmed by grief, find support through our resources and bereavement services here.Support the showSupport the 'Don’t Be Caught Dead' podcast with a one-off or regular donation to help Critical Info, a certified social enterprise, keep creating free, high-impact conversations about death, grief and planning—every contribution fuels our mission to reduce the burden on families and build a more death-literate, compassionate community. Donate here now.Learn more: https://criticalinfo.com.au/Connect with Don't Be Caught Dead podcast host Catherine Ashton & Critical info on socials:https://linktr.ee/catherine_critical_info?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=c1879300-84db-4c70-9270-18d17d3ec22aMusic composer: Ania Reynolds - https://www.aniareynolds.com/