How to be kinder to yourself after cancer

Talking about self-compassion after cancer. How to be less hard on yourself, soften self-criticism and navigate life after treatment when things feel harder than expected.Recovery isn’t always straightforward. Expectations change, things don’t go to plan, and sometimes, life isn’t what was expected. That can bring a lot of pressure and a really tough inner voice.In this episode of the Life after Cancer podcast, Steph talks with Dr Caroline Hoffman, an integrative oncology specialist and mindful self‑compassion teacher, along with Karen Sergeant, who shares her experience of navigating life after treatment.Together, they talk about the pressure to “bounce back” after cancer, the loneliness that can come when you don’t feel okay, and why self-compassion can matter so much after treatment.We talk about:-feeling flat, frustrated, or “behind” after treatment-when life after cancer doesn’t look how you imagined-the pressure to “get back to life” and “make the most of it”-why being hard on yourself is so common after cancer-what self-compassion can look like in everyday life-simple self-compassion practices for difficult moments-learning to notice self-criticism, comparison, and people-pleasing-feeling pressure to appear grateful or positive after treatment-finding support from people who understand life after cancer-learning to accept what you’re feeling instead of pushing it awayThis conversation is for anyone navigating life after cancer who finds themselves being hard on themselves, as well as friends, family, and professionals wanting to better understand life after treatment. It offers language, examples, and simple tools for difficult moments.Useful linksYou can find practical tools, exercises, and further support related to this episode here:https://www.life-aftercancer.co.uk/being-kinder-to-yourself-after-cancerDisclaimerThe information shared in this podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. If you have any concerns about your health or notice any new or worsening symptoms, please contact your GP or your medical team.Some of the research and evidence mentioned in this episode reflects the speaker’s academic and clinical work.Research, studies, and evidence mentioned throughout this episode can be found on our website:https://www.life-aftercancer.co.uk/being-kinder-to-yourself-after-cancerSome references are linked to the speaker’s academic and clinical work, and we may continue to add further sources and reading over time.Connect with usSubscribe here: https://www.youtube.com/@life-aftercancerWebsite: https://www.life-aftercancer.co.ukInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/life_aftercancer/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/life-after-cancerTimestamp: 00:00 - Introduction00:51 - Why life after cancer can feel harder than expected01:52 - Karen’s experience after treatment ended05:22 - Why so many people struggle after treatment09:09 - Why we’re so hard on ourselves after cancer14:27 - What self-compassion actually means17:04 - The 3 parts of mindful self-compassion23:31 - Can self-compassion improve wellbeing after cancer25:25 - Karen on self-criticism and trying to “get on”27:01 - Finding support and real understanding31:32 - What self-compassion looks like in everyday life37:14 - “How would you treat a friend?” exercise40:57 - Guided self-compassion break47:02 - What to say to yourself on difficult days50:32 - Advice for anyone being hard on themselves52:10 - Expectations vs reality after cancer treatment56:32 - What helped most after treatment59:14 - “It’s like landing in a foreign city without a map”1:00:02 - What people said that wasn’t helpful1:03:55 - A message to her post treatment self1:05:33 - What healthcare professionals need to understand1:07:51 - Final reflections