How to Date with Depth: Building a Better Profile & Avoiding the Swiping Spiral

Media LinksWebsite: delvepsych.comInstagram: @delvepsychchiYouTube: youtube.com/@DelvePsych20Substack: delvepsych.substack.comParticipantsHosts: Ali McGarel, Adam FominayaOverviewWhy is dating so hard?Ali and Adam draw from their clinical work and co-led dating therapy group to explore why modern dating feels so fraught—and how to make it more meaningful.The dating profile isn’t a resume.Trying to represent your whole self in three photos and a prompt is impossible. The goal is to start real conversations, not craft a perfect brand.Depth starts before the first date.They walk through photo choices, prompt strategies, and first messages—focusing on how to lead with authenticity, care, and clarity about your values.Bad matches are good signs.Intentional dating means fewer matches, more rejections, and better outcomes. Reframing rejection as necessary—and even helpful—opens space for real connection.Lead with love—even in the apps.From transparent bios to thoughtful swipes, Adam and Ali argue that empathy, self-awareness, and even a little stoicism can reshape how we seek connection.Breakdown of SegmentsReflections from Delve’s dating therapy groupHow to choose photos that show more than just attractivenessWhy group shots, kids, and exes in photos can undermine your messageWhat to say in prompts: a 3-part guide (offer, need, personality)How to stay intentional while swipingWhen to swipe vs. wait for matchesThe mindset needed for good conversationsWhy rejection is part of the processHandling harassment and burnout on dating appsTexting before the first date: how much is enough?The case for emotional risk and why it’s worth itReferences & Further ReadingDelve Substack: "React, Respond, Expand" – conversation skills in actionStoic concept of amor fati (“love your fate”)Research on facial recognition and the fusiform gyrus (neuroscience of dating photos)