How to Safely Leave an Abusive or Unhealthy Relationship

from Unsilenced: Real Conversations About Abuse · host JBWS / MC Robinson

When a person decides to leave an abusive relationship, it marks a significant loss of control for their partner that can make the abuse escalate. Most domestic violence homicides and serious injuries occur when a person decides to leave an abusive relationship. That is why safety planning is crucial for all people experiencing abuse, even if you don’t plan on leaving immediately. In this episode, JBWS staff member Robin Hughes discusses:General tips to increase your safety How to deescalate an abusive situationInvolving children in safety planningStaying safe after you leave the relationshipAnd more CONTENT: (0:00) Introduction (2:08) What Is Safety Planning?(6:00) Preparing to Leave An Abusive Relationship (8:13) Signs You Need to Deescalate (10:08) How to Placate an Abusive Partner for Safety (14:20) Tips for Preparing to Leave An Abusive Relationship(18:32) "Where Do I Go Now?"(21:35) Staying Safe After Leaving (27:35) Document The Abuse (29:41) Ideas for Safety Planning (35:48) Safety Planning With A Restraining Order(39:35) Involving Children in Safety Planning(43:32) Weapons and Abuse (46:06) Recap on Tips for Staying Safe(51:44) Resources and About JBWS *Every person’s circumstance is different. This podcast is intended to offer general tips for safety planning, not to offer advice. Not every suggestion will be right for you. Call a domestic violence agency and speak with an advocate to develop your own safety plan. Resources and About JBWS: JBWS's Services: Jbws.org/services Morris County, NJ 24-Hour Helpline:1.877.782.2873Passaic County, NJ 24-Hour Helpline: 1.973.881.1450General Resources: https://jbws.org/helpful-domestic-violence-information/Ideas for Safety Planning: https://jbws.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/Developing-a-Safety-Plan.pdfIf you notice controlling or unhealthy behaviors in yourself, JBWS can help. Call 973.539.7801 or visit⁠ ⁠⁠jbws.org/jcnv If you don't live or work in either Morris or Passaic County, NJ please call 800.799.SAFE (7233)Intro and outro music donated by Billy Morris

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This episode was published on January 27, 2026.

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