How Women Actually Carry (ft. Adelina Mae)

Adelina May joins State of the Second to talk about how women actually carry a firearm day to day, and why most of the conventional advice misses the people it claims to serve. She runs Girls Just Want to Have Guns, a company with women instructors and women attendees that teaches women across the country to go from anxious around a gun to confident enough to carry every day. Her path started young. She grew up with guns in the home, started training around age 12 when her dad pulled her into his church security team's range sessions, moved into competitive shooting, and has been a grandmaster for the last six years. Working at a manufacturer during Covid showed her how many people buy a gun and assume they can use it, and a conversation with her own mom, who couldn't unload the gun kept by the bed without being shown, convinced her most women in America had never actually been taught. Adelina's core argument is about meeting women where they already are. She builds her classes as events, not lectures, with branded pink gear, gift bags, raffles, and a group photo, so first-timers show up excited instead of intimidated. On gear, her first recommendation is always a good holster in hard plastic or Kydex with a clip that won't pull out when you draw, like an Ulti clip or DCC clip. On training, she focuses on conceptual understanding, real-life scenarios through her monthly gun club, and dry-firing from the actual position and outfit you carry in. She is direct about the parts of the industry that hold women back: gun-store staff who steer women to a gun because it's pink or small instead of what performs, product launches that only picture tactical models, and instructors who tear new shooters down or ban long nails from class. The hosts and Adelina dig into mindset and instruction, including why spouses often make poor teachers, how a single negative comment can take many positive ones to undo, and when an instructor should stop correcting and just let a student shoot. The conversation closes on the soapbox segment, where Adelina names what the industry still misses: relatability. She argues that if every model in the marketing is jacked, tactical, or a dark femme fatale, the average woman concludes the gun world isn't for her. Her fix is to show real people in real clothing doing real things, then train women to perform in what they actually wear, cute dress and heels included. Questions this episode answers What is the first accessory a new concealed carrier should invest in, and why? Adelina Mae's first recommendation is always a good holster in hard plastic or Kydex, paired with a clip that won't pull out when you draw, like an Ulti clip or DCC clip. A holster that stays put on the draw is the foundation everything else builds on. How does Girls Just Want to Have Guns make a firearms class feel like an event instead of an intimidating lecture? She builds her classes as events rather than lectures, with branded pink gear, gift bags, raffles, and a group photo. The goal is for first-timers to show up excited instead of intimidated. Why does Adelina say so many women own a gun but don't actually know how to use it? Working at a manufacturer during Covid showed her how many people buy a gun and simply assume they can use it. A conversation with her own mom, who couldn't unload the bedside gun without being shown, convinced her most women in America had never actually been taught. What mindset issues do women bring into a first class, and how does she work through them? Many women arrive anxious and easily shaken, and Adelina Mae notes that a single negative comment can take many positive ones to undo. She works through it by knowing when to stop correcting and simply let a student shoot. Why are spouses often the wrong people to teach their partner to shoot? Adelina Mae and the hosts discuss why spouses often make poor instructors, tying it to how easily a single negative comment can set a new shooter back. A neutral instructor avoids the personal dynamic that makes correction land harder between partners. How are women treated and sold guns at gun stores, and what should they do before buying? She is direct that gun-store staff often steer women toward a gun because it's pink or small instead of what actually performs. Her counter is to focus on performance over appearance and to get real instruction rather than trusting a store's snap recommendation. What is the industry still missing when it comes to reaching women in 2026? Adelina Mae's answer is relatability. When every model in the marketing is jacked, tactical, or a dark femme fatale, the average woman concludes the gun world isn't for her, so she argues for showing real people in real clothing doing real things. What everyday drills and practice does Adelina recommend for carriers? She focuses on conceptual understanding, real-life scenarios through her monthly gun club, and dry-firing from the actual position and outfit you carry in. The principle is to train the way you'll actually perform, cute dress and heels included. Chapters 00:00 — Welcome and rapid fire questions 02:01 — First accessory to upgrade: get a good holster 03:10 — Top drills for everyday practice 05:13 — Who Adelina is and how she got into firearms 08:13 — Building a class into a fun, branded event 11:37 — Concealing in real outfits and the creator approach 14:01 — How companies are building for women 15:56 — Mindset issues women bring into class 20:15 — Why spouses make poor instructors 21:25 — Corrections, encouragement, and the seven-to-one rule 27:08 — How women are sold guns at the gun store 30:37 — Soapbox: what the industry is missing on relatability 38:45 — Where to find Adelina and the GOALS summit About the guest Adelina May is a female-only firearms instructor and the owner of Girls Just Want to Have Guns, a company with women instructors and women attendees that teaches women across the country how to go from scared and anxious with a firearm to confident, effective, and carrying every day. She grew up with guns in the home and started shooting around age five. She began training near age 12 alongside her dad's church security team, moved into competitive shooting, and has been a grandmaster for the last six years. She worked at a firearms manufacturer during Covid and has worked at gun stores. She also runs a monthly gun club and shares concealed-carry and educational content on social media. Key quotes "the first thing I tell people is that regardless of what you do, you have to have a holster." — Adelina May "we teach women across the country how to go from scared and anxious with a firearm to confident, effective, and even carrying every day." — Adelina May "they think they can automatically use them and they have no idea what they're doing." — Adelina May "when somebody says something negative to you, it takes seven positive things to outweigh that one negative thing." — Adelina May "we want to train, like, how you're going to perform." — Adelina May "I think companies really need to start looking at their marketing and going, hey, we need to market to the average gun owner or the person who is just getting into this." — John