I'm a Good Guy

I've never done anything wrong and don't look into it. My record is so squeaky clean you could eat a big bowl of Indian food on it. There are so few skeletons in my closet that it's like... it's like something you could say that would be funny to insert into that setup. Maybe something about Halloween? But there aren't skeletons, so that doesn't really make sense because as we know Halloween is notoriously brimming with skeletons. Hey, if you've ever said "hallows eve" in a joking manner you should probably take your own life. That's really not cute or funny and people become very uncomfortable in the air that sits between your next words. Everyone looks down on people who use cutsey language to describe things we already have popular words for. Now, I will acknowledge that there are almost 180 episodes of myself recorded on here, so if you catch one where I did slip up and say "hallows eve", please send me a private DM and I'll arrange for my life to end. Thank you for your patience.