In the Presence of Each Other

I spent the day researching job opportunities for my daughterOhmygoodness, it is SO much easier to do this for someone elseEspecially someone you loveI identified a dozen people to reach out to, a dozen more jobs posted todayWrote a dozen cover letters and rewrote a resume to include requirements from all 12It’s been absolutely fascinatingMy shoulder didn’t get sore at all, even though I spent most of the day on LinkedInI got more done for her today than I’ve been able to do for myself for weeksThis reminds me of the spoons in heaven -It’s lovely to feed each otherFeeding ourselves isn’t nearly as fulfilling, even when it is possible or necessaryThe Dalai Lama tells us the fastest way out of depression is to help someone elseGiven the prevalence of depression these daysWouldn’t systems to help each other be super handy right about now?I imagine they’re there, but there sure are barriers to entryIt took over a month before I could begin volunteering at the local homeless shelterToday I worked with a woman who is taking a community college math classThe structure of the assignment was distributed over 4 different sheets of an excel fileWhoever wrote it worked on it for a long time, but it was virtually impossible to understand.And I love mathI feel for the teacher. Community college instructors aren’t making the big bucksBut this was profoundly poor instructional designIt’s a catch 22Ivy league schools have the luxury of and mandate for elegant, straightforward educational toolsCommunity college gets whatever that instructor can come up with on the flyProfound learning inequities persistHow, in this digital age, we haven’t made best practices available across channels is beyond meAnd it’s frustratingBut the answer is right hereIn sharingIn serving each otherIn pooling our resources and being invested in each otherYou’re doing it for me right nowAnd I’m gratefulAnd I’m doing it for youWith these remindersWe need each other, and we have each otherFeeding each other is how we create a heaven from the hell of feeling aloneFeeling that we have to do everything ourselves is a trauma responseAnd entirely not trueWe just have to get past those barriersAnd remember:We’re part of an ecosystemWhen we allow ourselves to be fedWe nourish our rootsAnd strong roots bear fruitsAnd those fruits make feeding others easy This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fallingtenderly.substack.com