Local Karaoke Machine Repairman Finds Secret Document In Machine

This episode is also available as a blog post: http://thecrookedwheel.com/2022/08/28/local-karaoke-machine-repairman-finds-secret-document-in-machine/ HONOLULU, HI—After opening up a malfunctioning karaoke machine for repairs Monday, local repairman Tom Kwan discovered a top-secret CIA document hidden inside the machine. “I’ve never seen anything like this before—it’s a highly classified document from the CIA detailing the agency’s plans to assassinate a high-ranking terrorist leader,” said Kwan, who added that he was “shocked” to find the document in a karaoke machine, especially since it was written in Japanese. “It appears that the document was accidentally left inside the machine after one of the agency’s operatives used it to assassinate someone at a birthday party. I don’t know how they expect me to get this back to Langley; I don’t know anyone who can translate this. I guess I should just throw it out.” At press time, Kwan was reportedly terrified after receiving a phone call from an anonymous CIA agent demanding that he return the document or else face severe consequences.