Losing my dad at 2 and stepdad at 18: grief taught me to use my pain

What happens when grief finds you young — before you even have words for it?Jamie Gamache lost his dad to a sudden heart attack at just two years old. Then at 18, his stepdad Keith died in a sudden accident. Jamie joins me (Tanya Wilkinson) today, to share how childhood grief quietly shaped his identity, his creativity, and his drive — and why he believes there are two types of pain: “pain that uses you, and pain that you use.”We cover:Growing up without a father & grieving what you never hadWhy talking about the dead — even joking about them — matters more than we thinkMen, grief & why we share facts instead of feelingsThe film Kindling — and why we need stories that show men being vulnerableWhy Jamie still can't talk about his mum getting older (and why that's okay)Counselling, friendship & how to start the conversationQuote of the episode: "There's pain that uses you. And there's pain that you use."Are you journeying with grief?JOIN GRIEF COCOON, my new monthly virtual support session - a sacred space for grief in busy lives: https://tanyawilkinson.co.uk/grief-cocoon DOWNLOAD MY FREE Grief, Grace & Growth journaling ebook: https://tanyawilkinson.co.uk/grief-grace-growth-journalDisclaimer: This podcast is for entertainment purposes only and does not constitute professional advice. Nor is it a substitute for professional support. Follow Death on the Daily:Do Like, Comment & Subscribe to this channel  Share this episode with a friend who might need it. Subscribe to my Substack: https://open.substack.com/pub/deathonthedaily/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tanyawilkinson_ YouTube: http://youtube.com/@deathonthedailyFind out about my work as a Grief Coach and connect with me here: https://www.tanyawilkinson.co.ukYou can connect with Jamie Gamache and his work here:Kindling: rent on Amazon or Sky Lowkey Films: www.lowkeyfilms.co.uk Jamie on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jamie-gamache-85470290/ Mental health support resources: www.mind.org.uk Speak to your GP about local NHS Talking Therapies that are availableThe theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission. You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: [email protected]:00: Introduction 02:13: Growing Up with Loss: The Death of Jamie’s Father03:38: The Sudden Loss of Keith and Its Impact09:09: Grief as a Catalyst for Independence and Growth14:44: The Role of Presence and Memory in Healing18:20: Normalizing Conversations About Death and Grief21:30: The Power of Storytelling and Shared Humanity25:01: Challenges in Talking About Death with Family27:39: Men, Emotions, and Breaking the Silence33:27: Advice for Grieving Individuals and Support Systems37:03: The Role of Counselling and Community Support41:50: Building Deeper Connections Through Vulnerability46:45: Transforming Pain into Resilience and Growth48:03: Resources and Final Thoughts