Mass Debate: Throat GOAT vs Overplayed Note (Did Mariah Carey Make the Best Christmas Song Ever?)

On this week's episode the eggnog is flowing, the sleigh bells are ringing, and the claws are out as Kirk and Jed square off over the Queen of Christmas herself with the question: Is Mariah Carey’s holiday earworm “All I Want for Christmas Is You” the greatest Xmas song of all time? Kirk comes in hotter than chestnuts on an open fire, praising Mariah as a divine snow-dusted goddess of holiday cheer, whose high notes could thaw even the iciest of cold hearts. Jed, meanwhile, argues the song is audio fruitcake, engineered in a lab to torture retail workers, steal husbands, and kill the American Christmas from the inside out. Kirk accuses Jed of being a frosty Scrooge with a lump of coal where his soul should be, while Jed claims the track is less Silent Night, and more Sinful Delight. Moderator Kraig can barely keep the tinsel from catching fire, and Hung Juror JT remains silent but his blinking pattern appears to either be Morse code for "make it stop", or signs of an oncoming Yuletide stroke. Naughty, nice, or just unhinged, this one will leave you ho-ho-horrified on this episode of Mass Debate!