Nasty Whites

What this episode covers

It's time to own up to the fact that we whites are a problem. I know, I know, I don't want to be the one who has to finally bring the hammer down on us, but I'm looking around, I'm scanning Wikipedia, and based on everything I see I think it's time to admit we're the problem. And it's getting worse. We're fatter, stinkier, stupider, and we're aging like shit. Not to mention all that crazy racist stuff we've been up to for the last... thousand years? Is it safe to say that the whites have been out of control for at least a thousand years? It's time to reign it in! No more white pride, folks. You got nothing to be proud of. Go check yourself out in the mirror. Take your shirt off. Really look deep. Still feeling that white pride? You still think America should only have you? You still think Britain is better off with only these pale, flabby, bug eyed beer chuggers? Is that a good place? Imagine going to Europe and it's only those white people standing around. I'm getting shivers down my spine just thinking about it. Give me the Indians! Get me a store run by a man wearing a turban! Let me hear the sweet sounds of Muslim worship, or whatever they're chanting about in those mosques. We gotta spice things up or it's all over. If we keep letting the whites get away with their bullshit the whole world is going to be bland, fat, and dumb, with our particular brand of polite but world-ending violence. So say it with me: Fuck Whites!

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