North By Southwest

What this episode covers

It's the same premise as the movie, but instead of Cary Grant getting mistakenly identified as a spy he's stuck on a fucking runway for forty five minutes because the airline didn't plan ahead for even one minute of their departure and arrival, and so there's another fucking plane at his gate and he's definitely going to miss his next flight because Booking.fuckyoucunt.com decided a seven second layover in shithole Phoenix was enough time to switch planes. And no, no they don't reimburse you whenever they fuck up their own schedule even when it's the same airline for both flights. And no, there are no flights leaving Phoenix because everyone died of heat stroke last week when the temperature in their concrete desert was one thousand degrees and everyone who lives in this wasteland is over the age of nine hundred with a great pension from their garbage collection job in the year 1073. And no, when they downsize from their mansion they bought for two thousand dollars that's now worth five million dollars they won't be giving it to their family, but selling it directly to Blackrock so they can further throttle the market for their benefit while everyone slouches from fentanyl overdoses in every major city in America. And no, you aren't allowed to hurt those CEO's because, at the end of the day, they're FATHERS and HUSBANDS. Other than that it's the exact same movie.

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