Overcoming Negative Self-Talk: Keys to Business Confidence

Have you ever felt like negative self-talk was holding you back in business? You're not alone. In this eye-opening episode, I sit down with Dr. Gary Sprouse, a retired primary care physician and author, to uncover a surprising method for boosting your self-worth AND your income. Show Notes | Transcript "Whether we like ourselves or not, it affects our self-esteem. The problem that we've gotten into is we don't count all our achievements." - Dr. Gary Sprouse Author of "Highway to Your Happy Place: A Roadmap to Less Stress," Dr. Gary Sprouse shares his unique perspective on self-esteem, blending his medical knowledge with psychological insights. We explore his innovative "50-point wake-up" system and how it can transform the way you view yourself and your accomplishments. Discover how to: Accurately assess your achievements and give yourself proper credit Reframe your self-perception using Dr. Sprouse's three-part self-esteem model Overcome the hidden culprits behind chronic stress and self-doubt Key insights include: The surprising connection between your ability to envision the future and your self-esteem How to use "realistic optimism" to navigate challenges without succumbing to fear A practical "worry organizer" tool to manage anxiety and boost confidence in negotiations Dr. Sprouse also introduces his four D's - Deny, Deflect, Diminish, and Dismiss - and explains how these unconscious behaviors can either reinforce or undermine your self-esteem. Whether you're an entrepreneur struggling with confidence or simply looking to enhance your negotiation skills, this conversation offers a fresh, science-backed approach to building unshakeable self-worth. Get ready to rewire your thinking and claim the success you truly deserve! Resources: Join the Soulful Women's Network Connect with Gary Sprouse: Website: TheLessStressDoc.com Email: LessStressDoc (at) gmail.com Books: Highway to Your Happy Place & Mindset Matters Women in Podcasting Awards Live. Love. Engage. has been nominated for a Women in Podcasting Award in the Mindset category. Today (Oct. 1, 2024) is your last chance to show your support. Go here to vote: womeninpodcasting.net/live-love-engage Thank you! Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Dr Gary Sprouse So good self esteem perpetuates itself. Poor self esteem perpetuates itself. So to get out of that, you have to stop using the four ds and be willing to accept that someone's saying something nice about you. Gloria Grace Rand I am Gloria Grace Rand, founder of the L.O.V.E. Method and author of the number one amazon best seller Live. Love. Engage. - how to stop doubting yourself and start being yourself. In this podcast, we share practical advice from a spiritual perspective on how to live fully, love deeply, and engage authentically so you can create a life and business with more impact, influence and income. Welcome to Live. Love. Engage. Namaste. Imagine waking up tomorrow feeling unstoppable in your business, armed with a secret formula to price your worth and negotiate like a pro. Well, stick around, because you are going to discover a physician's surprising method to boost your self-esteem, revolutionize your income, and finally claim the success you deserve. But before I bring him on, I'd like to welcome those of you who may be new to Live. Love. Engage. I am Grace Rand, and I help female entrepreneurs attract clients by going beyond search engine optimization to embrace my definition of SEO, spiritually engaging others. And joining us today is Doctor Gary Sprouse. He is a retired primary care physician and author of the book highway to your happy place, a roadmap to less stress. So without further ado, I am going to bring him up onto the stage right now and welcome you to Live Love. Engage. Dr Gary Sprouse Great, Grace, thanks for having me here. This has been awesome. I'm really looking forward to this. Gloria Grace Rand Yes, me too. Because I love. Well, number one, I love the name of your book, actually, because, I don't know, I think it was last year or something. I was walking along the beach one day and I started making up my, making up a song that I'm like, I'm in my happy place, because it is. But I want to dive right in and actually talk about what I promoted today about self-esteem. So our audience is entrepreneurs, in particular, women entrepreneurs. So how can we go about boosting our self-esteem? Because I know sometimes, sometimes things happen, and it can kind of, we can kind of take a little hit on that from time to time. Dr Gary Sprouse Sure. So I'm a physician, right? So here's the weird part. So I consider myself a holistic doctor because I can, I have all the physiological and all the medical, chemical stuff. I have that knowledge that I learned from medical school, but I've also learned all the psychological stuff, how the brain works, things like that. And so one of the insights that I brought to this equation is that the majority of human stresses are actually side effects to our skills. So what that means is we can envision the future, but then that means we have to worry about it. That's the side effect. So my book is basically about how do you keep the skill, lose the side effect. But when it comes to self-esteem, that's such an issue, right? Because first off, we have a definition, as humans have a definition of good and bad. So the side effect, that is, you could have good self-esteem. Side effect is you could have bad self. So my dog, now, she has this cut on her back she has, like, a scar, she has a lump on her neck. Doesn't bother her self-esteem at all because she doesn't have those skills of deciding what's good and bad. So the problem with self-esteem is, what I found is I'm not sure we all define it as well as we should. When I talk about self-esteem, I talk about three parts to self-esteem. So there's how you feel about yourself and then how you feel, like, what I call self-efficacy is. So self-efficacy is where you go, hey, how would I do it in the future? Okay. And then the third part is, you know, how do I think about, how do I envision? Well, so let me go back. So it's like there's self-esteem that's broken up, and then you have. There's a thing called, one of the things that we talk about is achievements. And so what I hear from people about achievements is you shouldn't count your achievements. You should just love yourself for loving yourself. And I don't know about other psychologists, but what I find is when something goes well, I feel really good about myself. And when something doesn't go well, I don't feel good about myself. And so what I realized was our achievements and lack of achievements definitively affects our self-esteem. Whether we like ourselves or not, it affects our self-esteem. The problem that we've gotten into is we don't count all our achievements. So I have this thing that I call the 50 point wake up. So I wake up in the morning and I'm still alive. Yes, I get ten points. I have food in the refrigerator. Yes. Ten more points. I got running water. Yes. Ten more points. My wife is still alive. Another ten points. And I'm living in a safe house. Ten points. So I literally wake up, opening my eyes, and I just got 50 points. And then somebody comes along and says, hey, I got this project. If you take it on, you can get 20 points. And you're like, sure, sure, let's do it. And they go, well, but if you don't do it and you fail, well, then you're going to lose 20 points. But I woke up with 50. So if I lose 20, I'm still at plus 30. But if you wake up and you're at minus ten, when you wake up, I'm like, ugh. So I might go to work. This. Things aren't good. Somebody comes along and says, hey, I'm going to give you something. You can make 20 points. You're like, yeah, that sounds great. And then you go, yeah, but you can lose 20 if you don't do it. You're like, I'm at minus ten. I could be a plus ten and feel good. Ooh. But I'd be at -30 you know what? No. Not going to try. So then they don't even try. So what I found is part of self-esteem, then, is figuring out, hey, if I count my achievements accurately, there's no way I can have positive self-esteem because we take all these other things for granted, like, I'm still alive. That's not taken for granted. Like, I have running water, I have food. None of that's taken for granted. And when you give yourself points for all of that, then there's no way you can't have good self-esteem based on your achievement. Now, there are going to be times when things don't go well, but it won't balance. Like, if you're giving. Here's what people do, they go, well, okay, I woke up. That's one point. Well, but then this didn't go well. That's minus ten. Well, if you're going to give yourself one point for every achievement and minus ten for everything, that doesn't go well, yeah, that's going to be. That's going to make it hard. Gloria Grace Rand Well, I love that. First off, I think that is so cool. And you're right. I mean, it's not something that we would typically think about doing. And especially, I think it was so important when you talked about just assigning enough points to those things that, you know, like, yeah, you just. You woke up today. Hey, that's pretty good. I mean, it beats the alternative. Dr Gary Sprouse If you’re an entrepreneur, and you have a business, yeah, give yourself credit. Like. Like, I've watched my wife do this. Like, we had an apartment building and it needed a screen, and it was a weird size because it was an older building. And I'm like, well, I don't know what we're gonna do. She goes, well, I'll just make it. I'm like, wait,...