People need to be held before they’re told.

What do we do with our loved ones whose lives are out of step with the Church? We love them; listen to them; accompany them. Share with them our own struggles and convictions. We keep them connected to Jesus through our love and prayers so that His grace can work in their lives. We can support those we love without celebrating every choice they make. As difficult and uncomfortable as it might be, our call is to receive and to trust God; to create space in which His grace can work. We're speaking here about persons, not policies; Church teaching does matter. But love obeys the law of gradualness. Few of us reach the ideal to which we’re called all at once, whatever the virtue, and our culture only makes that harder, particularly in the area of sexuality.