Pick 37: Slick Flick Wick: Man's Best Foe--Cry "Baba Yaga," and Let Slip the Dogs of Wick (John Wick, 2014)

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics! Allow me the three-piece-suited pleasure of shooting near your ear, around your detectable, audible sound and on your periphereal but never directly at you while I, through gun-fu, bring you the myth, the suburban legend, the whispered fairy tale/dreamy nightmare of Baba Yaga and his Slick Flick Wick, an entertaining, slick/flick-explaining series, a desirable diversion from the main black hair slicked back, blood slick Wick vein of Chemohawk Sessions. You're our Cinematic Fanatics; we, your worthwhile f****** cinephiles. For your 37th episode, Gut shot, blood clot Red Devil and I review one of our most admired, appreciated and adrenaline fueled gun-fu, artistically inclined, richly colored, sleekly shot, animal rights activist's wet dream, duel directed/written team, tale so straightforward, yet dreamy and surreal, you feel as though your levitating somewhere between a surreal reality and a real fstars dream, high body count slain by such lethal, graceful hands belonging to a lean, mean man in a slick Wick suit that you should not, cannot--will not discount, the required gold coin amount is already in the high tables bank account and there is no gunman, bodyguard, guerilla, or godda** shotgun blast of gastroenteritis or pistol-whipped bout of gout, whether the foe be a beefy, brawny bodyguard, bodybuilder beefcake, or a razor thin, slim, wiry, speedy and scary adversary, he will dispatch all of the above like lethal Wick cream on a pesky rash.   This film is composed of three acts, the backstory, the sob story precipitating, culminating into the cataclysmic, chaotic, calamitous dispatching of his beloved doggie: Daisy, now a mangled mutt and the deliciously, diabolically bloodthirsty denouement with carnage laden consequences. Those who proclaim Keanu can't act need to clean up their own fstars act, for dialogue and line delivery is but a scintilla of an actor's responsibility, if you see, with your own judgmental eyes, and likely try to explain it away and theorize, you still cannot deny that you believe Keanu is John Wick: an undeniably sleek, swift, sharpshooting and slick former cold killer turned puppy lover, with every slick Wick roll, chop, shot, stab, deft grab and sending 77 bodies to the morgue's cold slab fitted for an embalming and toe fstars tag, then Keanu is a tremendous actor and presence on the screen; I will boldly state it is method acting for if you spent 8 hours a day for 4-6 months straight stunt driving, shooting and martial godd*** arts, then you are a skilled professional who we all would, no doubt, performing your own risky as shiz stunts appreciate. Enter, with me, you cinematic fanatics, into the realm of film's fantasy while we unwind the grind of reality… I offer you: Pick 37: Slick Wick Pick: Man's Best Foe--Cry "Baba Yaga," and let Slip the Dogs of Wick (John Wick, 2014)   Today, we discuss--the folly of thinking that you can mangle a man's mansion, dispatch his Daisy, purloin his prized ride, not even wipe your shoes on the welcome mat, and think you will get to enjoy a bubbly alcoholic refreshment in a bathhouse hand-delivered to you by voluptuous call girls unmolested, the cinematic evidence that slicked back hair and a facial contour fitting beard is the look of assassins not lame bureaucrats, the only personality more watchable than Keanu doing what John Wick Keanu will do is Viggo, the red shirt, black suit bearded Russian crime czar who may run, but will fail to get very far, for Wick's impressive display of tattoos are hiding bullet scars, and unlike 50 fstars cent, he cares about his cars, he might drink in bars, but does not wind up behind bars, and Wick can double tap a target 3 feet away or on the far side of unclefuc**** Mars.   - Your worthwhile cinephile: Candles burn twice as hot with Wick and a gun: Falsetto Prophet  P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.