Real Friends

In this deeply personal and reflective episode, Patricia explores the profound, complex, and transformative nature of friendship, how it shapes us, how it can hurt us, and how, ultimately, it can lead us back to ourselves. Through heartfelt stories from her childhood in the Irish countryside to her adult years navigating emotional growth, boundaries, heartbreak, and healing, Patricia shares how her friendships have mirrored her inner journey, from people-pleasing and pain to empowerment and self-love. Whether you’ve held on to lifelong friends, outgrown connections, or felt the sting of toxic dynamics, this episode is a reminder that every relationship can teach us something, and the most important friendship is the one you have with yourself. ________________________________________ In This Episode, You’ll Hear: How growing up without a “best friend” shaped Patricia’s understanding of friendship The joy of childhood bonds and the realisation of unspoken connections How past friendships influence our current relationships & beliefs The grief of being left behind in friendships, and the guilt of letting go The impact of toxic friendship dynamics and how they keep us small How people-pleasing shows up in friendships, and how to reclaim your worth What Schadenfreude and Freudenfreude reveal about true support Why boundaries are key for emotional wellbeing The meaning of Anam Cara, soul friendships, and connecting with your own soul ________________________________________ Takeaways: Friendship doesn’t always look how we expect, but it’s about how it feels. Grieving a friendship is valid. Letting go can hurt, even when it’s the right thing to do. You don’t need to earn love. Healthy relationships are mutual, not transactional. Boundaries protect your peace. The only people upset by them are the ones who benefited from your lack of them. You co-create every relationship you’re in. Own your part, grow from it, and choose from your authentic self-loving, self-caring heart. You can be your own best friend. It’s the most authentic empowering, grounding friendship you’ll ever know. ________________________________________ Quote of the Episode: "Friendship is what it feels like, not what it looks like." ________________________________________ Episode Resources & Mentions: Brene Brown’s work on empathy, shame, and vulnerability The emotional concept of Schadenfreude vs. Freudenfreude Coaching reflections on people-pleasing and emotional boundaries Instagram post referenced from “We’re Your Girls” podcast The Irish term Anam Cara – “soul friend”   Find out more at www.pacoaching.co.uk or email me [email protected] to book a 1:1 discovery call to find out more about mental fitness and improving your wellbeing and relationships