And all you canines and all you molars welcome to another episode of Jesse and Wilders guide to life the first of the new year I'm Jesse. That's Wilder. We're here to guide your new year's resolution guiding your life even more. Yeah, that's what we're gonna do Yeah, what did you say at first?
Your canines and molars the Molars molars. Yeah, I did think you ever thought you said molar and I was like bro. I don't get it. No, I'm not I'm you know me I'm never I never forcing the files on anybody that don't want it, but what you want to share a little experience You had is that what you're that what you got on the brain?
Oh, I mean I did I did watch my first episode of X files Yes, this is very true. I watched what I think fans and and you know creative forces behind the show would agree The best episode to start is peacock brothers. Yeah, it's about it's a horrible It's a it's actually good television like it's well made but it is a nightmare to watch and for somebody's the episode of television Yeah, yeah horrible horrible the antagonists of that particular episode are some of the worst in the biz It's big without giving away to you might know spoilies for this 25-year television show It's big like hills have eyes vibes if that's if that kind of my Describe be loved it and her mother love the peacock brothers all they ever do is talk about the peacock brothers talk about a morning New tonight, it's so I had somebody who loves that show so much that I got a tattoo that Inspired by I find it Distressing to say the least that that is sort of their preferred episode. Yeah, and you know, I think I think I'm good I think that I know all I need to know I think I pretty much have had the same experience that you have had That sucks anyways, I'd love to stop talking about that episode of television and I'd love to start talking about this episode of You're not gonna believe this the fifth annual Bully moly.
Oh, yes, bro Tis the season are you okay? Let me act first of all bully moly for those that are initiated It's college football bowl season a sport that while and I both care deeply about we both know all about the teams And all their their players and their fans and their mascots and whatnot and there's about 10 million college bowl games roughly every year And and so my thing is I arranged some of my favorite my favorites And I tossed them a wilder with one sort of decoy thrown in he has to spot the fake is the name of this game You last year a perfect record you nailed it you got both I don't usually do I don't usually succeed at this game But look so let me ask before we get into it. Have you seen any of the sort of viral content that has come out of this year's Bowl season? No specifically yesterday.
Oh, no, okay great Then we're gonna find we're gonna have a nice little conversation of revealed the end so I've got to round Yeah first round we have the cricket celebration bowl Okay, that's one two Avicados from Mexico cure bowl the what the cure the cure bowl. Yeah. Yeah, let me say all those words avicados Yeah, I'm next word from yeah next word Mexico next word cure like the band the cure or like to heal okay Next word bowl. Okay.
Yeah If it was a game of which does not belong in that one sentence that would this would be like you can pick any and be wrong still Next up number three star co brands LA bowl hosted by Gronk star co Star co is one word star co brands Mm-hmm label Hosted by Gronk. Yeah, it sucks that Gronk is the word. I recognize the most so far. Yep The Denny's grand slam bowl sure Batch it on the sport there couldn't have changed it to touchdown.
Oh no and the the famous toaster Reebel the famous toaster Reebel toaster II as in like the word toaster but with a Y at the catch of the end Mm-hmm. So those are the first five would you like to hear them again? Yeah, well you run through again for me real quick Yeah, real quick number one cricket celebration bowl number two avicados from Mexico cure bowl Number three star co brands LA bowl hosted by Gronk number four Denny's grand slam bowl number five famous toaster Reebel I think that it's the first one the cricket celebration bowl. I'm gonna give everyone at home a chance to guess Okay, unfortunately the cricket celebration bowl real.
Mm-hmm. Like cricket wireless. I believe so. Yes But to put the word cricket celebration it's out.
I know it's like a celebration of crickets. Correct. There's no way that anyone is seeing that is like oh, yeah Quickie wire mobile gear. Okay.
Avicados from Mexico cure bowl also real. I figured I know the brand avicados from Mexico Right. I just okay cured doesn't make sense to me But brand name and to then to just toss on cure bowl at the end as well The star co brands LA bowl hosted by Gronk would have probably been my guess and I would have been wrong. That's real Yeah, you're not that sounds sounds like a fictional mega-corp in like a sci-fi movie that owns.
Yes Like every weapon like yeah, mr. Robot evil. Yeah. Yeah like Skynet star co brands The Denny's grand slam bowl fake that one's me.
I need that one up. Yeah, okay. Good one good one Yeah, and then the famous toastery bowl bro. I don't know what I'll get to the bottom of this.
Do we think toastery is a brand? Yeah, bro famous toastery I should not tell you that famous toastery breakfast brunch lunch all at once. Oh and that one's hosted in Charlotte, North Carolina So you could you could go to the the toastery bowl if I'm playing in the famous toastery bowl It's it already it already concluded actually it was a close game a three point game Which team did you play for before I say which teams were in it the home team? No, it's good.
Pretty good. Yeah, that was western Kentucky Nearly edging out old dominion your favorite school Okay, you're ready for round two. Yeah, okay, bro. We have famous toastery.
So sorry is a restaurant that's less than two hours from me Is it but it's got to be a chain right? It's not one restaurant has this bowl that would be insane Okay, I'm looking at their website locations. Let's see. Oh, okay.
She's yeah. Oh, yeah, it's a that's a Carolina special They're all over. I'm not a specific trip North Carolina. Dude.
I didn't know we had a Denver What's the menu like though? I mean I need to pop a squat on this menu real. Yeah, I see some you got a menu this special They have like a flight of mimosas excuse me face necessary famous toastery All day first of all day lunch. I should hope so.
Oh, sorry lunch is closed now. We can't we actually can't make a BLC anymore You fucking nervous toastery looks like ass Yeah, doesn't even the pick when the pictures on the website aren't like super slammin. That's a big That's a big oopsy. They also have a curious font choice.
It's like it's sort of like uh where like it says all day lunch It's sort of like comic sans, but it almost like if it was written in chalk for some reason Yeah, I hate it. I think we should get we should get off of the famous toastery website. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Okay, next round next round next round hit me first one the Dutch Bros. Alamo bull Give me a serum Captain America Scooters coffee frisco bull 68 ventures bull Next one pop tarts bull.
Oh, that's it next one quick lane bull I gave you all the little shorties in one so you'll repeat them. Yeah, that's bros alamo bull Yeah, the scooters coffee frisco bull the 68 ventures bull the pop tarts bull the quick lane bull I think it's the scooters frisco bull Incorrect scooters coffee frisco bull is real that sucks. Uh, what is scooters? Do you know what scooters coffee is?
Oh, they're Just looking at websites dude. I hate them all of them are pretty scooters coffee It's got the first the opening sort of splash image. It's got a bunch of pistachios It kind of looks like a Dutch bros actually vibe, which is yeah, and what is the pistachios doing? Oh because it's a pistachio drink limited time.
I'm sure yeah, okay Um, no the scooters coffee is real 68 ventures bull real pop tarts bull. We're gonna talk more about this in a second real quick lane bull reel The Dutch rose alamo bull fake Got it. So the pop tarts, but I it's wild to me that you haven't seen anything about this our algorithm is very clearly different The pop tarts bull was last night. I don't can tell you who fucking won the game or even who was playing in the game But there was a lot of um antics I'm gonna text you something that was kind of win around first that it was sort of like what sparked the into the nation I was in the nation's interest and then I have gonna have I am gonna have a follow up So there's a short video and I'll kind of narrate it as it gets into you.
Oh, yep So we got a pop tart master. He up on the he up on the toaster who big smile has risen from a toaster a huge toaster Probably bigger than my whole house that toaster and there's fireworks going. He's got a dance He's got like all different types of shit. So what they did at the pop tarts bull is they at the end of the game He went back into the toaster and what came out was a what it looked like him you see It was really edible and the winning team got to eat that so I'm gonna send you something else I see to find it But what the the optics are pretty cut dry which is that this mascot I understand was devoured by the winning team He goes back in the toaster and he knows that his demise is no that was him That's a giant pop tart that they the winning team did eat Is what I'm looking at that remains his eye it look so yes and when it looks like folks is the oh, that's so scary He looks like uh to face from the Batman Yes, very much very much like fleshy red sort of yeah or like red skull.
Yeah, he got it's crazy Man, it's pretty I hate it. Is there footage of the people eating him or is there footage of the edible version coming out of the toaster? I have one that's like set to a different like a song or something. Obviously that doesn't matter I don't know what that I got you.
Yeah, he comes out of the toaster Dreams really do come true. He holds up a sign and he points down. Oh, he's going in they bring him down He's got human legs not anymore Um and he's going into the toaster he throws the sign behind him. Well, thanks down like Han Solo going into carbonite Fans look concerned.
Oh, and then something what's the little trace a dude that he's coming out of oh edible mascot We got a he's sliding out and he's you and he's weakin and And my boys my boys the dude fucking big fat pop tart and that man just takes a ripping bite of it Bro comes out of a thing that says edible mascot like this Hate god yuck. I god bless america god bless pop tart. How am I supposed to relax now? Great segue dude great segue Um Yeah, so we're talking about relaxing just like the pop tart did in his last few moments before being Yeah, as he got baked baked up.
It's the new year. Maybe your resolution is like chew. Oh, you know Just one last thing one last thing please. Please.
Please. I just would you please update that for my death plan? Yeah, dude. We'll slide you into it But you have to be still alive a little bit before we do it because it's not obviously I'm gonna be still alive a little bit It's not for a course dude.
We're not no that's weird It is for a live person to become an edible thing of course. All right. No fucking tell me about relaxation Uh, okay Pretty good right. I can't believe you managed to I was like man.
This really fucking sold it for a little Read any social media anymore. I go on social media I give like a half a scroll and I see the first two things when I'm over it. Yeah fair enough, but then you're missing out Like this. Yeah, um, okay, we're talking about relaxing and I actually want to I think Well, I was gonna start with a demerit, but maybe maybe there's a category.
Yeah, there's a category I think the category is why are you relaxing right sure and I think a very not quite lit is because someone told you to Like when somebody's like hey relax. There's nothing. Yeah, more never once works. Yeah, that's absolutely I have to tell you couldn't have more of an opposite effect.
I'll become incredibly fired up People don't know that right it's also like calm down right right and I you have just now turned me into a wild animal I'm feral if you tell me to relax. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. So that's that's no good.
Why else are people relaxing? Well, no long day, hadn't it? Long day. I just need a freaking kick back and relax.
Oh, like that. Just like long day long week long month Just you know like because Because of life dude you need to because you've been breath well, okay life bro life happens Okay life. I'm gonna give it to you because that makes it sound extremely like a bummer. I gotta very quiet live for you.
Yeah Finish all your chores Is that even is that even better than a three finish all your well? This is goes back to like a like giving yourself a little treat finish all your chores Time to relax also like for me I this is like a the means to the end right like this is how I motivate myself to do my little chores Like for sure once I fold the laundry it's gonna feel so much better Sit like sitting down and doing nothing. Yeah, what you singing when you doing laundry? Dude don't make me fucking Yeah, there it is.
Oh my bed laundry laundry. Oh, yeah here. You gotta like the nickel back spin that you really Yeah, I mean I didn't want to give him the sick cut on the same version here in my beer Especially after I just listen to uh Foo Fighters kind of a similar little vibe there Um Okay finished all your chores. I love it another big one which is like this is like a specific type of relaxing I guess but like A honeymoon is like a big relax, right Yeah, like I guess because you because you're the big task is done.
Yeah different than finish all your chores Yeah, one big one big test your big task and I love yeah, that's like a fucking the chores version on steroid, right? Like you you finish like a week's long project at work and now it's time to freaking kick back have a couple of high school cruisers Come on. Mm-hmm. Okay.
This is one that neither of us can relate to but why are you relaxing? The kids finally went to bed. Yeah, that sounds good I feel like that's a two because that's such an impen any time you're relaxing, but there is like a clear sort of Clear and present danger of my relaxing being eliminated weekend Oh sure like nothing to do. You know what I mean?
Yeah, that feels okay. Yeah weekend. I think is it too because it's like nothing on the sketch I guess this is another categories where right where we were relaxing. Yeah, and I mean it seems like couch is unbeatable I don't know you think couch is unbeatable.
You're putting out of the three, huh? I don't know what I don't know where I prefer. I mean like you sleep is not relaxing I don't think is it though. I think it's I think sleep is relax I think that is I think ways to relax is probably a category like a nap but like are you taking bed naps bro?
Nah, I'm not a baby. I'll never get up. I'm not a freaking baby. I'll get up and I'll feel like pure shit We've talked about this naturally.
Yeah nemesis of mine personally. Um sleep is it I guess it's a waste. I'm trying to relax. I'm trying to enjoy myself.
I'm trying to find someone like gas me But like you do a bunch of hard stuff right like physically hard stuff and then you hit your head hits the pillow that you tell me that's not Peak relaxation when you know that's just going to bed at the end of a long day. I know I'm saying it's a two to me. It's a two Which means it is a two oh TV. Yeah, I'm gonna say TV slash media right like video game same deal.
Yeah, good game movie Um What about okay, so where to relax? I'm gonna say more vaguely like oh you said couches of three I don't believe you agree with that. That's right. Um you know the couches of three well because I feel like we're looking at worse I'm concerned with scale right like are we saying that couches in the same category is like Uh like a spa you know what I mean?
Well sure I just think I think it's in this I think it's still a three because most people could do it whenever they want Yeah, there's an access. Yeah. Yeah fair for you spa. Obviously very quite lit What's your what are you what's your spa activity bro?
What's your ideal spa? Like a massage you talking to sauna? I mean obviously all of them spa one time you live in once um yeah, bro. I ain't going to the spa come on bro This collar's blue, baby.
You got a spot up. You don't want to to where you're going to land us dude You gotta hit the spot when you're in like of course of course Uh, I did we hit a spa in this crazy hotel in spain that I went to with my family and it was bananas It was like stone and the sauna was I loved it. I'm not here to talk shit I just bucket not a millionaire. So my hair going to spaz all them day dude.
We got a bunch of um Like pretty inexpensive spaz in the bay area because people just want to It's like we went to one the other day like on clairmon in oakland and it's just like a little They're not they might do massages with it But it's like uh they have like a little sauna with a little uh a little hot tub and the hot tubs outside It's nice dude. It's not too bad opposite here All the ones here are like luxury shit in the mountains Oh, yeah, that gets that makes sense because they're trying to upsell like that's why parties should Um I let dude. I love the cold bath in a spa dude. Oh the cold Mm-hmm.
We went to that when we did our Supposedly dude. It's so good. We're gonna is great. We went to a water spa dude There's blasting you with fucking host Where's spa?
Where's spa dude? It's so tight. Um Okay spa daddies. Yeah, we gotta do that should be our whenever we do our next part We've been popped in so long dude.
It's been it's really it's heavy on my heart, but uh, I guess what you pop the fun Do you stop? Yeah, sometimes you pop well sometimes covid pops and then you just never That's the end. Never go anywhere again. Yeah, you've moved.
Yeah, one of you you switch coasts and then that's the end Um Spa might be a way to relax. No, uh All right. Well, let's for ways to relax. Let's get let's tease out the spa stuff.
How tub is it too to me? Because hot tubs are kind of gross. Do you agree with that? Yeah, I agree From where what do you think about bar like for happy hour?
That's sort of that's sort of an unwinding moment, right? Yeah, how about Friday at five? That's where okay. I like that.
Well happy hour. I think that's a two to me I don't yeah, I don't mind it. Uh, it can be I mean there's just so many the thing with relaxing take it from a pro The thing with relaxing is I want to Have the least amount of variables in any given situation, right? Like when I go to that's why like an all-inclusive resort is so relaxing because you it's taken any guesswork out of anything You go and it's and everything's done for you a happy hour Would you agree that the best time to relax is by yourself?
Oh interesting By yourself. I don't know. I don't I think that there's you don't think there's no variables at that point You know what I'm saying like yeah You like let's say you're in uh, you're in a hotel and you're for work and you're done with the day And now you're just in your room. Nothing on the docket.
No a person you can't even go anywhere Yeah, I mean that's a decent location. That's pretty good. You said hotel. Yeah, I agree I would put you know, I might fuck around put hotel third or I mean a third Jesus Christ three Um because a lot of times it has a spa Uh, you get a little point sometimes Yeah, like if they're doing it right then it's a it's a three like an Airbnb It's a two maybe a one dude.
Is it one? No, yeah, no, no, no, no, no If I'm in an Airbnb that means first of all, I'm not trying to do that anymore because I hate them But yeah If I am that means I'm probably in like a neighborhood and I'm going out to do something Is that relaxing? You're talking about relaxing growth. I'm right, which is why I'm probably not relaxing in an Airbnb Okay, so is it two or is it a one?
That's a two. I mean it's got a it's a home. Yeah, sure Um Dude, I have a one it sucks, but it's true Uh Ways to relax dude with your family Oh, yeah, bro. Obviously no Like I go on a lot of family vacations and I like them for a lot of different reasons Not on that list is relaxation.
Let me just tell you that much Uh Um, okay, dude. We gotta do the one everyone cares about the beach bro. Obviously, that's a one for us, right? Yeah, I hate the beach dudes not relaxing at all.
What about poolside? That's just not me. I'm not gonna be out here landing on a chair by a pool or the in the pool Okay, so can we get in the pool generally pool is it too? Can we just set up?
Yeah, very pretty good pool Uh, okay, great. What about uh, just getting back to the spa stuff, dude. What about a massage? Do you love a massage?
Um only had one. I damn dude. You are poor. She's a loser.
Yeah, it was good. I liked it I think it's a I mean I fell right asleep, didn't I? Yeah, to me It's a little bit of a two because I really like them but I there is like I feel like I can't always slip right into like oh, yeah, this is nice and relaxing like a lot of times I'm just like boy. I wonder just to get out how hairy my back is, you know, I mean like yeah, bro So here's what I want to get into is like Do you because this is what I do a lot of the time if it's time for wabu to relax Wabu will sit down to relax and then wabu will say to himself 1000 times an hour for the next six hours What should I be doing instead of this?
Yeah, that's and that's no good. Obviously. Yeah, it's bad Uh, that's why I has to be like a clear like I want to be here's ideal situation for me relaxing It's a fucking snowstorm and I've locked in my house and there's absolutely nowhere I could be going or doing or you know what I mean Right, you yeah, yeah, yeah, it is your when relaxing is your only option Correct. That is so very quite lit.
Yeah, I'm gonna put that as I entered a new category It's strategy and I think a strategy is when it's the only option Here's a horseshit strategy. How about like for a day's work like a 45 minutes of work 15 minutes of relax 45 minutes of work like a little Oh schedule do you cut you I think that's like a one scheduled relaxation like I'm going to relax for 15 minutes sounds bad Well, that's like so like meditation Yeah, yeah, okay. Do you do you meditate? No, like uh To there are things I do to relax, which I guess what's the difference I suppose I just mean like I don't put it's not like I'm going to fold laundry for the next 25 minutes And then I'm going to sit down for five minutes and then after that I'm gonna make my lunch like to me It's like oh I finished my laundry time to relax.
You know what I mean? Then I'll have some lunch at some point. I don't schedule I can give it a two but a schedule is like stressful inherently to me like I don't want to I think it's a one I think it's a very no. Oh, yeah, that's what I said.
I thought you were pushing back on it uh However, I do think the strategy of planning your relaxation is a little it's a different than schedule But like knowing right while you're doing your little chore or while you're doing your big project knowing like what about like let's talk food, baby Is comfort all the classic comfort foods like macchi cheese and mashy tatos and all the goodies like that's part of relaxation sometimes I suppose it is. I think it's a two dude because like you can act. Yeah, it is because you're gonna feel like duty afterwards exactly right Exactly. You're like, oh, this is so comforting relax to eat this chicken pot pie and then fast forward one hour and you're like man I wonder why I'm in so much physical abdominal vein pot pie bro.
What was less than you know chicken pot pie? not recently, but Shout out to homeroom you know clinthe the mac and cheese place they make a Chicken pot pie mac and cheese, which is doesn't have a crust like a pot pie, but it's got all the in it's got the broccoli and the peas Uh, it's a fucking dank as hell. That sounds so fucking good. It's so good, but it's a safe deal where I'm like, well, this is good It's so comforting and then after I mean homeroom has classic burrito situation where you get, you know, 75 through and you're like, well Not enough to save but too much for myself.
Yeah, what I should yeah, so instead I'll just make myself pain. Oh my god Wait, this is I forgot to text you this This is related not to relaxing but to comfort food. I was at Chipotle demerit. If you're going to Chipotle relax, it's done Uh, which I my relaxation decreases sharply the minute I enter a Chipotle.
Yes So I was in there at the Chipotle and I would be the end the end of family of european tourist came in They sounded like German or Swedish or something. I don't know which how did you how did this become your place that you are? But they come in and they're ordering and it's already like a little funny and then this one guy goes I'll have a burrito I'll have rice actually I'll have extra rice so he orders a double or a rice in his burrito and says that can I get black beans? Uh, actually can I get double black beans?
That he has the biggest mound of rice and black beans and he says that's it You don't wanna eat cheese or salt or anything? No Well, it's like what I ate for dinner every night in college Oh, man, except that you you ate it out of cans because you were like a broke college student This is a man who paid probably like 16 dollars for the most starch you could ever and like It was just so funny to me But that man shit his pants all the way back to Germany. God damn that was funny. What do you think about a movie theater?
I think it's a pretty good one. I think it's a two Because like as soon as the thing is it's honestly in peak conditions movie theater is like a three to me But as soon as like somebody's they never in peak conditions. Yeah, exactly right. Somebody's looking at their phone.
Oh, I become enraged I'm not relaxing at all like I could see the light of someone's screen. Oh two people talking behind me I'm gonna lose my mind. Oh like there's so many different things I could just irritate the hell out of me Oh teenager not relaxing. Oh, bro.
I'm never relaxing around teenagers. Yeah strategy get it stay away from teenagers That's a lot of animals a little puppet dog. Oh, I like that. I like that I like I think it I think that's like a Three or two I get like especially if you don't if it's just like You're at a place that has them and it's not you're not responsible for their life or needs or anything You know what?
I think you're gonna disagree with because you hate the outdoors But I think a three is a walk a little walk now a little walk. I think is relaxing. I get that a little walk Especially if you're like full, you know, you're too full But along with that dude where to relax camping it's a one for me. I can tell you that much it is not relaxing at all Yeah, it really depends I mean what is the I think that you can I think you can do things during the day that are relaxing Right, but at the end of at the the sandwich in between that potentially relaxing experience is the act of packing and unpacking the act of driving Yeah, and then at the end of the day when you're supposed to relax arguably the most Then you have to go sleep on the ground.
Yeah, it's potentially freezing colds 10,000 times Yes, so to me camping look I'm on the record about it, but it's not relaxing say what you will about it. You like it It's fine. That's fine. Don't fucking tell me it's right.
What do you think about just like okay? So not camping but like Activity outdoor activities fishing you got their fishing bro. You working through your problems with with nothing more in your hand But of fish and rod I feel like people do it right it seems so I'm immensely immensely popular for relaxation It just seems so fucking boring. Oh, bro.
Very pretty good. Obviously is always drugs. Someone help you relax. Someone.
That's for sure Yeah, that's okay. Sure guys as well too for sure as per usual fishing dude. I think I'm gonna give it a two I something must be getting something out of it Well, because it's so fucking boring unless I mean unless you're like, you know out on a speedboat shooting Manta rays of the harpoon gun or something. Yeah, but even even the boring one right so then you're it's boring or whatever you're relaxed and you're getting your Whatever I'm actually relaxing.
I'm actually that it's boring. Yeah, I've done it a bunch It's boring so now I was doing it as a kid which is like that's same same like why are you giving a kid? Why are you bringing a kid? Honestly parenting is easy.
Don't bring your kid to the most boring thing you could possibly conceive They're not gonna like it for the rest of their lives. That's it. That's the tools This is more of a wear than a tool Very not quite lit as we probably both agree a hammock Yeah, no, you hate a hammock row. Yeah, they said I won't even say anything about it.
It's it's clear. It's bad I don't know what to tell you like a hammock. I don't know what to tell you. Yeah, you're out of here Unfortunately, you're tossed.
I'm gonna toss a drink as alcohol. I mean we talked about like happy hour I think like that's also obviously I would not relax at a restaurant I don't think if I'm relaxing with food it needs to be at home. I agree that it's weird if I'm relaxing at a restaurant I'll say it's a little strange. I mean Just like ever talking about a restaurant not a bar, but not like a pub right I will say that like in public generally unless you were at someplace that its explicit purpose is to relax like a like a spa like a hotel In public I will say a tough one.
I have and I did this a lot in college at the end of a long day This was relaxing and sitting solo at a sushi bar. That was kind of quiet. That was relaxing as hell for me. Yeah, fine Yeah, I still think restaurants kind of overall a restaurant is a no-no.
Yeah, that's it's a tough one Beyond public transit when I'm relaxing. Okay. I want to be public transit. Yeah, I do I want to be I think like obviously for relaxation the less people the better what about reading do people have to read to relax That's probably like a two.
I think that's probably pretty decent one I do want to talk tools bro like what's your fit? Oh my god my fit is this what you mean by tools? Yeah, bro Well, it depends doesn't it if I'm at the spa. I'm not wearing my comfy sweatpants I think that's your your home your standard home relaxation fit dude.
You know I got my my tight jeans on my fucking button down Yeah, you got your fucking cacks and your shoes are laced up tight. I'm crying Your goddamn knees. I am currently wearing some Some khakis I do I love to relax Ian khaki I Feel not relaxed if it's like past 10 a.m. And I'm still in like the jammies or sweatpants I'm sorry.
We're sweatpants all day long every day. I know I can't do it I there's like a mental barrier and I can't wear it in public either I got a big argument with my students. I'm not wearing sweatpants in public. Yeah, I mean you do doing something right Jesus Christ I'm relaxing in the park in the park is I guess it too I don't know because it's like it's honestly fine.
There's nothing in the park that's relaxing I have to bring the relaxation to the park. I have to bring my book or like Something like that. It's true. It does seem like you're defying yourself to relax.
Yeah What about music dude? I think music can add a lot of relaxation the right music. Obviously not you're not putting on motorhead or something Yeah There he is a little deeper An octave lower than okay, I think back to your question about a fit I think just a three is an appropriate fit right you want to be comfortable if you're going to the movie theaters You're not wearing your sweatpants because that's disgusting if you're going to the spa is elite you said robe Afro. Yeah, I do love it.
I do love a bathroom. Come on No, dude, I'm not you dabbling come up you walk around your house and I freaking kimono. I honestly would I Fuck yeah, what they see come he's hell dude. You gotta get a kimono and rep please I still might think get my goddamn initials monogram.
Yeah, dude for sure. That would be not Quick Google search for what kimonos can white boys where and then it's just it's crazy. There's only one search result It's just the word none big the first thing that came up is a quora is it racist for a white person to wear a kimono the internet says Dog if if someone has to answer bro bro the answer is so good tell me Someone shout out to Sean weighing responds by saying answer the following questions Is it racist for a black person to eat Chinese food is it racist for a Chinese person to wear Nike is it racist for Is it racist for a white person to have Thai food is it racist for an arrow but to eat a Mexican restaurant? He's your answer to any of the above is no then there you have it You know what is racist forcing people of a race to conform to perceived racial standards Oh, yeah, dude that guy seems like somebody you would want to agree with and there were I a Shot Sean Lane if you're listening seem like a good guy, you know You can come to my home shop we can have conversation because I'd like to teach you a thing or two about false equivalencies But somebody eating Chinese food versus wearing the garb of a culture feels a little different And also which culture is Nike dude?
I think it's like good Greek is that what we're doing Well Nike was invented in Oregon Correct, but it's named after of course the Greek goddess. Oh, right, but Tight dude, but yes, it is it is racist either way because people from Oregon should not be only people from Oregon Rather should be able to wear Nike. Yeah, correct That's what they were all that's why they all went down to the Capitol on January 6th That's what they were yelling about too many people. It's not relaxing a political discussion, bro Fucking politics are you joking me?
Yeah? Politics party is a party is not relaxing is it? That's a one Party well, I guess you tell me buddy But you know it is just maybe popping down with the homies after the bar. Oh The little do you be around?
Yeah, dude a little post bar Hank like the classic actually you guys want to just come back to my place again. That is pretty chill I do like that if if you're into it sometimes I'm too sleepy for that right which is what yeah You have to you have to gauge the sort of scenario here But yeah for sure the context is key. What about game night game? I can be kind of relaxing.
That's not relaxing for me at all Okay, well you're playing probably not relaxing games. So I guess that's the crucial element What's relaxing game night? Dude, we have loads of relaxing games because Chelsea only I mean we have the Stardew Valley board game because Chelsea doesn't like to be competitive So we only have like cooperative board games, so you do we're just hanging out fucking yeah Let's do yeah. Why don't you go check the the farm and I'll go down to the lake and sketch some fish That's lovely for you, too.
I do need to defeat someone if I'm playing a game Well, you get okay, that's fine. All right. I'll put game night I was a game night is just it's too many there. It's too many variables for things that drive me crazy sure like I Obviously play games the way I play games and anyone that does not play games the way I do I want to kill myself They're out.
Yeah, I understand. I understand Dude, what about a place to relax you like a cabin in the woods? I actually I somebody who doesn't like the outdoors kind of love it to be honest Yeah, if the remote the remote thing is great obviously as long as you know, there's no killer outside, right? I can't suppose that is the fear Mm-hmm What about a little a staycation what do you think about that?
You're you're never done it seems fucking stupid to me Like I'm not gonna pay for a hotel in the city. I live in I just I'm not doing it I'm gonna spend that hotel money to see a new place I could just go to have drinks at that hotel like honestly We've talked about this a lot because there's a couple of really famous crazy hotels here in Nashville Every time it comes down to why don't we just go hang out at the bar and get some drinks eat dinner there and then come home to our beds Or two separate beds like yeah, I get it. I get so I understand that I understand all that I think that there is something I mean, it's a little different. I feel like where you are currently like for us.
It was like we did a little staycation during like kind of like When when Pandy was still kind of rocking things more than it is now And we got to stay at the air continental and say I'm just going for like way cheaper than we ever would have and It was pretty cool. I mean in COVID time and lockdown. That's obviously right. Yeah, I don't I don't think we would do that now I suppose but I also think staycation could count as like I took a week off But we're not we're staying at home, right?
I don't think it necessarily means you have to oh staying in is very quite lit Yeah, but I'm and I'm specifically yeah strategy staying in but I'm specifically talking about like I took work off I took three days off leading up to the weekend so we have five days and the staycation is we're just gonna spend them at home We're not gonna worry about travel and hotel stay. Yeah, I like that Maybe we'll go to dinner a couple extra times that we might but like we're just chilling. I'm into that What do you think the most relaxed you've ever been? Oh the most One time I did a sound bath and I fucking passed out in the middle of it.
Did it work was it good? It was wild Like they have to do these crazy breathing patterns and it was really hard and then they gave me them those you know They make you hold those magic space rods and then they were playing she obviously of course She tuned her gongs to the sounds of the planets which was something we all understand and I wrote about it for the internet and I went to do one and I was very skeptical But like I was out. I don't know what kind of magic spell they cast on me, but I was gone Okay, so it worked. I mean that sounds like a three to me.
It worked. Yeah, I'm gonna give that crazy hotel in Spain though My top relaxation. Okay, so just like a lecture on me did what about People obviously this is a one for me probably you also people love to fucking Relax via exercise dude like I just want to run it's so relaxing. What about that?
I think those people should be locked Yeah, cool And that to me goes yoga goes in there too. I feel like yoga is a big like relaxation thing. You're a yoga bro It's like not easy. It's pretty I can I can fuck with it.
I like I've done my little beginners one plenty of times and I do like it So simple stretch in bro. Just put like stretch in stretch. I do love to stretch. That's for sure about laying on the ground for 20 minutes I know we both fuck with that Yeah, I mean just a quick quick floor lay is power.
I mean that's like a strategy I think get closer to momma gaya right like closer to roots lay on the floor. Yeah sure Dude, I'm currently doing something incredibly non-relaxing that I think lots of people do as a way to relax And it's that I'm doing that same stupid puzzle that you recommended Puzzle puzzles. I think people use to relax. It is stressing me out, but I'm gonna give it a two because it is The normal standard practice of doing a puzzle is relaxing I don't know too much thinking going on.
I think I can relax in my brain spinning I think specifically I should say a jigsaw puzzle not like a not like a fucking word problem or something You know, I mean like not like a sure. Yeah, I love I love hot shower. Come on simple easy I mean sometimes a fucking cold shower will relax you recently, but yeah hot shower. Absolutely or a bath dude I'm gonna put slash bath.
I'm not a bath guy, but like people love a bath Yeah, I feel like this is pretty good Relaxation just like stay a little and writing a rubric for how to relax Yeah, don't do this don't don't make a podcast if you want to relax like Don't pot and podcasting is a demerit. No, I've been sitting here Tenses can be for the last 56 minutes Yeah, and there are like supposedly relaxing podcast to listen to and there's like you know Once they're like ASMR kind of and that is like I guess relaxing to people but I don't it's not I could probably sound effects is very pretty good. Like I put on there You know, I love the ocean set my my rain my rainstorm. Oh like a little white noise situation lumber Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think that's a strategy little whale songs dude.
You're blessed at whale song. Just Yeah, you know, I'm on a whale trail Oh, dude looking at your phone is like a two Yeah, I don't know. I just like don't I just lost my taste for social media. I don't know I mean that's what you look at fucking great good.
I like my phone games. Yeah, I was gonna say my little games Social media texting my little friends, you know, just all my all the little activities I keep in my phone those are kind of relax. It's so it's like a micro relaxation. We're like I'm relaxing for like six minutes While I'm like, you know, I do not find texting to be relaxing All right, what Seattle baby nice Orlando baby Jackson ville we got all the hits yeah going coast to coast corner to corner of this fine nation It's the Jotz bros.
It's the fucking it's the people that ordered the chipotle for sure They saw me staring at their freak order and they reversed googled me and they're listening now. So that's good sucks Thanks down for the art. Thanks to bad talk to the music. Thank you to Relaxation everywhere if you had it, you know, this is like this is to me the best New Year's resolution is to fucking chill out Dude, don't set some fucking weight loss goal.
Don't talk about I'm gonna read eight books this year or whatever like no No, you're you're not going to you don't go for reading no books to read a book a month like it just doesn't happen that way I'm sorry, but you know you could do relax Why don't you send us away if you ain't got the munch?