Ryan L - Honest Self Amends - Meeting 73

If asked about Ryan L's most prominent character trait growing up, his family would likely cite his need to be right. This trait caused him to inwardly (and sometimes outwardly) push his family members aside at the cost of the loving connections that he needed as a sensitive kid. Through his parents' attempts at sexual education, Ryan learned that sex was supposed to be a loving, connecting thing – never mind that it was only supposed to be used in marriage. At 8 years old, he discovered masturbation and then at 14 he discovered pornography and used them to avoid having to admit that he was wrong. His "inner child" never had a chance to grow up because he couldn't admit his mistake or accept his family members in their imperfections. Instead, he hid that boy away behind walls of half-truths, outright lies, and secrecy. Resentment became a way of life and it only progressed with the practice of sexual addiction. However, while watching his brother's change from the darkness of his own addictions to light, Ryan saw something that he wanted: real change and light. Ryan began working the 12 steps of recovery with ARPSupport sponsorship and SAL groups. One of the most powerful experiences he has had in the last 2+ years of recovery was the amends he made and still works on today to God and to himself.If you are hearing this meeting in recorded podcast form and would like to participate as a live audience member in the future, please go to www.reco12.com to learn more and submit your email address there to receive weekly invitations.  Reco12 is a self-supporting service and we appreciate your help in keeping us working our Step 12 in this manner.  We gratefully accept contributions to help cover the costs of the Zoom platform, podcast platform, web hosting, and administrative costs. To contribute, you can go to https://www.reco12.com/support  or you can click the link to PayPal (https://www.paypal.me/reco12)  in the chat of the live meeting. When you contribute, please specify the meeting number. This is meeting number 73.Resources mentioned in this meeting:Inner child questions:Have I been honest with you today?Where did I try to pause and listen to you today?How have I shown you love today?How have I shown you your worth today?What have I worked towards today?What did your emotional sides try to tell you today?How have I accepted and supported the little boy today?What did I try to run from today?Information on Noodle It Out with Nikki M Big Book Roundtable Informational Seeking and educating on how to donate to Reco12.Support the showPrivate Facebook GroupInstagram PageBecome a Reco12 Spearhead (Monthly Supporter)PatreonPayPalVenmo: @Reco-TwelveYouTube ChannelReco12 WebsiteEmail:  [email protected] to join WhatsApp GroupReco12 Shares PodcastReco12 Shares Record a Share LinkReco12 Noodle It Out with Nikki M PodcastReco12 Big Book Roundtable Podcast