What up, Mom? Put down that coffee and grab a wine. Get ready for another episode of Nursing and Cursing, a parenting podcast that covers more shit than your baby's full diaper. I'm Kate. I'm a stay-at-home mom of three living in Brooklyn, New York. Hi, I'm Christine. I'm a freelance video editor living in Los Angeles and mom to a toddler. Allie here, podcasting from South Kona, Hawaii, where I live up in the mountains with my husband and two sons. Hey, I'm Molly. I live in Los Angeles, California as a mom of a toddler and a teacher. And I'm Sarah, your in-house expert on all things mom and baby. I'm a nurse and a doula with a PhD living in Brooklyn, New York. Between five busy households, it's a miracle that we make it on the mic at all. But trust me, we need this as much as you do.
Hey guys, happy holidays and welcome to Nursing and Cursing. Happy holidays! Yeah, so this is our... I'm going to call it our annual holiday episode. Survival guide. Yeah, survival guide. Okay. Because every parent out there is trying to make it differently. Yeah. Different focuses here and there. Some people are traveling. Some people are at home and working on gifts. Some people are trying to teach their four-year-old the meaning of giving, which is impossible. That's me. You pick the wrong time of year, Molly. It's a great idea of terrible execution. It's so bad. It's so bad right now. He's completely missing the point. Nobody ever sent a letter to Santa about all the things they want to give other people.
Oh, man. But Molly, I applaud your heart and I know it's working because you've got a good kid. Oh, thank you. You haven't been around, but yeah. Actually, a friend told me about this whole, what are those things called? The countdown calendar? Oh, the advent calendar. Of giving? Of giving. And it gives you a little like to-do list of great things you can do for others. That's so cool. That's nice. We never got around to it. Wow, Molly, way to set us up and slap us down. I've been brainstorming, you know, about it a lot.
Ideas for next year. Yes. Oh, there's always next year. There's always tomorrow. Where is everybody right now in their holiday life? Kitty, how about you? You are in Oklahoma. We are a week away from Christmas. What's happening over there? Oh, we're a week out. Let's see. I'm done. I'm pretty much done. I just got a wrap presents, but I've got everybody covered. But yeah, it's been a little stressful. I'm not going to lie. I've been very stressed out. And over at the Nutcracker Ballet at the Civic Center, I called a lady an effing bitch as loud as I can in front of my three-year-old. Yes, I did. And then I hear, hey, Christine. Turn around. It's my in-laws.
So really feeling like I'm nailing this holiday season, just nailing it so hard. That's right. Maryam Bright. Maryam Bright. What did she do? What did she do to serve that?
It's such a long story, but it ended with her going to my face. You're not getting your money back. Bitch. After just a real shitty few days. She deserved it. She was in the line of fire, you guys. What did she expect saying that? Did you have Matilda with you? In a sing-song voice? In a sing-song voice. Thank you. Yes. No, it was just me and Levi. Our special, special mom and son date that I ruined by publicly humiliating myself. You're setting him up for dating real women. It's good. He's got realistic expectations.
No, yeah, totally. No, but really, I'm all sad. I just got to wrap gifts. We got trees. We got lights on the house. My son is so psyched. It's so fun this year because he's really super into it. So I'm in a pretty good place. Your house is beautiful too, Christine. Your house is made for Christmas. Thank you. It's very Christmassy. It's super fun. All right, Kate, you are in Brooklyn with three kids a week out. What's happening? Just like total, it's chaos. It's just chaos.
I'm like racing to rap. I have pretty much everything. But I'm like, I get the list and I just go down it and make it happen. Everything on the list? Yeah, for the most part. So whose list? Is it your list or like your kids? The kids. They've written out their own list. I'm being like a tiny bit vague because I don't want to wake anybody up and scar people. So they write a list to Santa and then you take the list and you just make it happen.
Basically, I mean not everything because it's like a million things on there, but what I can get my hands on pretty much and Then I like just kill myself trying to wrap it and then like just every year notice how unappreciative and disgusting they are when they open stuff and vow to do it different next year. Do you Amazon your Christmas? Because that's what I did this year. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, the whole thing. Actually, I had one amazing trip to Target and I think I texted you guys. Yes. I did have one amazing like this should be my nail, but I went to Target and my I was like I was like had two whole carts and stuff from the dollar section. That's the stocking jam.
That was a stocking jam, but I went deep into it. I hit every section. And, of course, the lines were insane, so the lady directed me to self-checkout, and I was, like, obviously sweating profusely and confused by the scanner and couldn't figure it all out for myself. They sent somebody over to help me, and neither of us could get it all figured out, and I got a full 50% discount. Don't know how. Stole half that virginity. It's a Christmas miracle. Hopefully no target workers are listening. Her name is Katherine Levkoff. You can help her. I was, I just, like, I was, like, it was one of those moments where I was about to be, like, I don't think you got, and I was, like, oh.
Thank you so much. You had a great Christmas. Yes. That is nice. Anyway. So that's where I'm at. And we do fun Christmassy stuff. We see the Nutcracker. We go to see the tree. We do the whole blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Ice dating. It's awesome. You do New York style. So great. Yeah. Molly, you guys are going to be traveling this year, right? We are. Yeah. We're traveling up north to New England where our family resides. And I'm psyched. And it's looking like snow, guys. We checked the forecast. It's looking like snow. Christmas Eve. Christmas Day. Yay. But yeah. The list is not stressful here because.
Santa brings one gift and that was very easy. Um, but the only stress is like making sure it like gets shipped and the stocking got shipped. Um, but it's easy, you know, cause we, it doesn't go too out of control. One gift. Does mom and dad bring any gifts? Um, yep. Mom and dad bring a gift too, which is like nothing big. It's like a sticker book. So we'll see if, you know, like I told you, we're having a major problem with gratitude, uh, on a daily basis here. I mean, fits, disgusting fits and we're working on it. But I, I think we might, you know, Christmas morning might be one of those. We're also, we're bunking up with, with another family. My,
My little cousin who's in kindergarten. And so I don't know if he's going to be looking over at her stash and comparing it to his. It will be different. I really hope we can keep his shit together. What about, do you think, will other people in that household, will there be more presents for him under the tree than just the one that Santa brought? The whole thing makes me uncomfortable. We tried to set it up when he was a baby, just one gift. I've said this on the podcast before, so sorry, this is a total repeat. But as he gets older, it should be interesting. But it's just what it is. I don't know. Just have to keep moving forward with it.
Yeah, that's a great, I mean, that is a super great and sensible policy. And I wish as they get older and they can start, you know, talking to their friends. Whatever you tell them is a lie. Every single thing that you tell them other than the truth is a lie. So you just pick a lie that you like the most. That's right. It's all a lie.
It's just your life. What's all a life? Don't tell Sarah. Sarah, brace yourself. You had been telling us recently. I don't know if that. Sarah, get that cat Prozac ready. You were wondering how Christmas goes down with a tiny baby, right? So where are you with your Christmas? Oh. What? Nothing. I was just remembering that picture you sent us. Tits in the tub? I go.
no the gift one the gift one oh yeah oh that was so cute but don't tell tim don't tell tim he hasn't noticed so my husband's name is tim but like now that we talked about it i would like to explain i tried to just we bought for francis for her birth for christmas sorry a little xylophone piano and it came like in a box and the box is like it exposes the piano but it's still in the box right so I handed that part the whole thing to Frances so that she could play with it because Tim won't let me just give it to her like my argument was that who cares it's it's you know she doesn't know what's Christmas and what's not like this is your Christmas present right have fun with it what's his argument sorry because no other argument makes any sense he's sentimental he's traditional he wants the magic well he loves the magic of Christmas loves it loves it loves it for him as a kid That's what he remembers. I get that. It's just like tons of presents under the tree. And that's the only time of year that he gets that. Anyway, so instead of Francis playing with the piano, she just is like gnawing on.
on the cardboard box part. And I was taking, I had given it to her so that I could like get a break and take a shower. And I got out of the shower and she had like pieces of cardboard in her mouth and like they're all over her face. Anyways, it's like the corner of the cardboard box is totally wet. The cat did it. Yeah. Oh my God, that's genius. How would I not thought of that already? My cat is crazy. She's on salmon flavored Prozac. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's so sick. Wait, is the cat the one that's crazy?
The rest of Christmas is going pretty well. We're going to be with my other sisters and their four kids. I've purchased all but one Christmas present. So I'm still not quite done. You better get on Amazon tonight, girl. Yeah, for real. For real. You're paying $30 to get it shipped to you. The ship has sailed like about a week ago for me to do Amazon because I'm in Hawaii. So forget it. Are you on top of your business, Allie? I did a lot on Amazon. But honestly, I am just biting my nails because the last bit that I did says it comes between.
Like the 18th and the 26th. Yeah. I hate that outside. That is my worst Amazon message. I'm like, ah, I'm just praying for a Christmas miracle. I'm praying for a Christmas miracle. What are the last, what are the last things, what are the last things that you're waiting for? They're toys. I have no idea. Kate. Guys, what are your big, what are, so wait, can we share what the big ones are? Sure. Just cause I haven't asked you and I'm interested.
I hope that my kids aren't listening because they're outside the door, but I recently ran over Leo's bike. So that's what he's getting. Great. Wow. That's a great gift. I know. And Phoenix, nothing really that compares to that. You know, like Legos and those cost so much money, as you know, Kate. So like a big Lego and a Pogo ball, I guess it's a big gift.
For first or second grade, I mean, second grade, right? He's first grade. He's first grade. I think a big Lego, to me, for a second grade boy, that is a huge score. Yes. And when I say big, I mean, like, medium to big. But, yeah. It's not like the $100 one, but it's, you know. You dropped $54.99. Yeah, totally. That's what I consider a big one, too. Yeah, for sure. The other ones are made for, like, teenage boys with no friends, I thought. Yes. And actually, I Black Friday'd it, so I think it was more like $29.99. Oh, you killed it. I know.
Chrissy, what's the big one over there? The big one that Levi got from Santa is this thing called Magic Tracks. They're these glow-in-the-dark little car tracks. Then it comes with these little glow-in-the-dark cars. Oh, my God. He's going to shit his pants. Boom. And then his stocking has, like, Pirates gold and, like, some Ninjago pencils. Oh, hell yeah. Hell yeah. And then he got a little transformer. And that's all he got because he's going to get so much from his grandparents, like, a disgusting amount. So we kept it real minimal over here. That's smart. Yeah. He's going to love it. He's going to love it.
I didn't get Matilda anything because she's a baby and I just didn't do it. Is Levi going to give you shit for that? Isn't Levi going to be like, oh my God, why does Santa not love Matilda? Oh my God, Kate. Yeah. That's remember. Think of that. That's the only reason you do it with two kids. I'm just going to wrap up a present. I'm just going to wrap up a onesie that she already has. Yeah. That's what I did when Leo was a baby. I just, I realized it on Christmas Eve when Phoenix was like, well, what is, what's Santa going to bring Leo? And I was like, oh my God. Thank you guys. Thank you. I put so many boxes of band-aids in a stocking.
Me too, Chrissy. I also loaded up with band-aids this year. Load up, load up. Oh, you know what I mean? I told Sarah to do this too, to wrap up a balloon in a little box so when the box opens, the balloon flies up. I love that. I'm going to do that for Maddie. But you have to get a helium balloon, am I right? Otherwise it won't float. That is correct. You got a helium, that bad boy. A couple days before movie. Where the fuck am I going to get a helium balloon? Oh, you know what? Party City by Target. I got Phoenix a Hogwarts t-shirt. Oh, that is so cute, Allie. I love that.
Wait, Molly, I want to hear. Wait, Molly, what's your big one? Well, it's not necessarily big. I didn't mean big one. I meant what's the centerpiece for the morning. It's just a little set of Star Wars figurines. Awesome. Perfect. Oh, go ahead. Sorry, Molly. Yeah, no, go ahead.
no I was gonna say one weird problem I had this year is that um the age gap between there's like the tree has really split like there's two categories it used to be two categories and it was big kids and Mavis but now it's two categories and it's Wilder and then the girls there's like a whole there's been a whole like shift in the dynamic over here so like I used to get Wilder and Edie like along the lines the same types of things right yes but now now it's like now I basically with a very very few exceptions have to get Mavis and Edie almost the exact same thing that was Ellie and I all the way that's phoenix and leo too i have parallels of pretty much everything maybe a slightly different um yes different color exactly yeah and the problem the problem there is that like most and ali maybe this is true for you too a lot of these gifts are not age appropriate for mavis this bitch is not so much that she does not deserve and has not earned okay yeah my favorite gift because you sent us a picture is you remember maybe this are getting it oh yeah oh so good Oh, my God. No, you say it. I'm not going to say it. Doc Martens. Glittery Doc Martens. So rad. I want a pair. So awesome. For a second grade girl, when she hits school again January 2nd with those bad boys on, she's going to fucking feel so fly. She's lying. She probably won't wear them. They're not going to be comfortable. But if she doesn't get them, she's going to have a complete shit fit. In regards to Santa, how old is your oldest now?
10, 5th grade. Where are we with this? You guys know it's been an emotional journey. And just to not drag the story out, to sum it up. he has asked me point blank and I have basically given him the gentlest truth this year. And we started to do it last year. And he pretty much was like, I don't want to know anymore. I don't want to ask questions. I'm not going to ask questions. I don't want to know the answer to, I'm choosing, I'm going, I'm choosing to believe, I believe in Santa. So that's where we are. I don't know if that's okay. Wow. Wow. But he has like, that's 10 years old. I feel like you made it a long time. Congratulations. No, I'm not. I'm like, I was really thinking like we, I mean, I wanted him to like,
I mean, I don't want to send him into sixth grade like at a disadvantage because I've been feeling his head full of lies. I mean, I thought it was fine to break the truth this year. But he wants the magic. He wants it. Yeah. Okay, good. Good deal. Good for him. You know, like that's so awesome that he has like that innate, like I want to still, I want to stay a kid. He has not asked any.
in previous years he has done a lot of fact checking with me like how does how does that he has not asked a single question this year and he did ask me when he wrote his letter to santa he before he put it in the envelope he was like do you want to like take a picture of this oh my i gave him a look like why would i want to do that and he was like i know you like to send daddy like drawings that we do and stuff but like we were both we were having so sweet yeah he's like he should like star in the polar express He's going to be hearing that bell jingle for his whole life, for sure. Or what is it, a thimble? I can never remember. Yeah, it's a jingle, isn't it? Well, yeah, that was me. I was holding on to your life. Okay, I keep having flashbacks like we've had this episode before. I think we kind of do. I know. We'll have it later, though, if they're older. Okay, quick round, Robin. Looking for some holiday gift ideas. So I just want to do a quick nursing and cursing gift guide for the holiday season. Maybe it's for your husband. Maybe it's for a teacher. What's a good gift?
that you would give to a husband. All of our husbands are so different. I thought you were going to say all of our husbands are so shitty. Some porn? Like, just give them all some porn, except Tim, because he doesn't watch porn, right, Molly? My Tim. My Tim doesn't either. You guys are so fucking dying. I haven't asked him in a long time. Okay, shut up, Kate. You guys are hitting that Stam and Prozac so hard. I don't know what else to say. I don't know who my husband is right now, so he can tell you himself and just give you his own perspective on it. Throw him on the mic. I'm sure when his wife is saying, you don't watch porn, do you, honey? I'm sure that your husband's going to be like, yeah, I watch porn. Okay, so what would you get? Let's see, what would we get, Jeremy? Oh, God, JJ.
The man who has everything. AKA me. What would I get JJ? Um, I tell you what I did get him. Okay. I got him. He's our number one fan. He's going to listen to this and it will be blah. Okay. So I'll hold off. Tell us what you get your teachers, your kids, teachers, you get them a present.
just cash money baby the only thing that's the only thing that new york city public school teachers want that's right oh my god i gave my gift card i gave phoenix's teacher a necklace you guys and it had a stone on it because you know she likes to like rub stones on them on their ears crystals oh my god and she opened it and she was like oh my god is this a laboratory and full tears full tears i'm speechless so so what would you have done if somebody had given you that i would have done this Oh, my God. This is so beautiful. This is so touching. This means so much to me. Exactly. And then you might have found it in the desk drawer back in June and I would clean it out. Or it's a great re-gift. No, you would be wearing it. Molly, as a teacher, do you get so many presents from kids? Like how? Yeah. Allie, I am just kidding. That's a beautiful gift. Oh, yeah, Sarah, but I'm going to tell you straight up. Kate's on the right track here because no matter how much you think you know your teacher, your teacher wants a gift card. Right. And you've got to be careful because some teachers get very offended with Starbucks because.
Teachers will be like, that's all, that's all I get. I personally love any gift card. I don't care where it's from. No, we do like a loaded visa or loaded Amex. It's known to be the best gift in town. And we always, I mean, I've talked about this before. The only reason I've ever volunteered to be a class parent because it's essentially a thankless job is because I love the chance to go big for the teachers for Christmas and end of the year. Awesome. Yeah. I didn't do it this year, but I always, I really try to always contribute because. That's very nice. And you know, Sarah, not everybody can. Right. So.
No, we do it from the class and we always say, everybody knows, whether you personally contribute or not, it's from all the families in the class. Nobody is shitty about it. And you know, furthermore, as a wife and a mother, I also like gift cards. Yeah, okay. I love gift cards. I do too. The takeaway. Get a gift card. Get a gift card.
I got him an art book. I got him a pair of jeans. I got him some coffee and some popcorn. Boom. Oh, the jeans. That is the cutest gift. He hasn't gotten new jeans in years. He loves like a couture sweat. He's like JJ. JJ also. JJ loves a brand sweat. He's permanently in sweats or in mesh. It's always a sweat that costs like $99. It's a luxury sweat. That's all the luxury sweat. Three, let's see. I'm going to say four out of our five husbands would enjoy a couture sweat. But if you put Ali's husband Peter in a couture sweat, he would murder you. Oh my God.
If it's not a Carhartt, he's not wearing it. Although Carhartt probably makes a couture. I'm going to Google that right now. It would be like a jogger. You'd Google Carhartt joggers. You know what I got, Pete? You guys know 23andMe? I do. Is that a good idea? What? Hell yeah.
I'm going to be so pumped. Why? Why not? He wants to know his ancestry. Totally. Oh, yeah. This is perfect for Peter. Guys, Carhartt does have jogger pants. I'm on Google. I'm on Google. They're super cute. Okay. So that's going to be the number one item in our holiday gift card. Oh, my God. There's a candle pair. The Avondale sweat pant. Moving right along. Okay. So money for your T-shirts.
teachers a gift card for the moms couture sweats for the dads I feel like they're the modern they're like the modern slipper how you would get your husband a slipper in the 50s now you would get him a couture sweat do any mom friends moms give other moms Christmas presents. We're all so busy and it's just understood. We don't have time. I like it that way, Sarah, where it's just understood. Maybe we'll go out. That's what I used to do with my friends in Los Angeles. We would have a little holiday dinner. Every year is different. Some years are tight and we just kind of understand. I haven't gotten any of you bitches anything. Oh, hell yeah.
Which I'm sorry. I would love to send you all stuff, but it's just whatever. Okay. I'm nailing it and failing it guys. I'll start. I have a fail and it is completely out of my control. So I woke up the other morning and I heard this story. Apparently in my sleep. Well, Tim was out watching a movie and I was sleeping and he came in, he shut down the house and he came in to cuddle in.
Go to bed. And he said that I snapped at him like really nasty. What are you doing in here? Don't drag all this crap into this room. You guys, dead asleep, don't have any recollection. He says my eyes were open. And I didn't realize it because when I woke up in the morning, I was like, why didn't you come to bed last night? Why did you sleep on the couch? And he looked at me like, no. He slept on the couch. Wait, Molly, did he leave? Oh, yeah. He said I'm not putting up with this shit. Oh, my God, Molly. Oh, my God. Who did you turn into? I don't know what I was angry about in my sleep. No clue. Okay. You have been being so patient with him, Molly? Yes. You've just been pushing it down and being so patient, and it came out?
when you had no control because he's the best and yeah I was laughing so hard like oh my god don't you he was pissed in the morning you know that's like when you have a that's like when you have a dream and you wake up pissed like you have a bad dream about your husband you wake up so angry at them that's like when you black out from drinking and you did something really bad and the person's really mad at you anybody else have a nail or fail Mine's a combo. So, like, inspired by Allie, who I know through, like, no choice of her own, but just the way her life is, gets up before her kids and gets everything ready before they get up. That's always, like, something I've wanted to do in my fantasies, but I'm way more the type that, like, let my kids wake me up ten minutes after my alarm's gone off, and then we're all just bickering at each other nonstop as we get out the door. And, like, just trying to pack lunches and looking for socks and, like, can't find the right hair tie and just, like, oof, just a bad, bad scene. So, last week I got up at six, an hour before the kids get up for school.
And it made such a difference. I made breakfast. I made lunches. I got the kids stuff together. And then I gently rose in from their slumber. Amazing. And it all worked out great. And that was my nail. Awesome. And my fail was that I was just fucking so high on how good I had done and so stoked at how seamlessly the morning had gone that we skipped off out of our front door like we were in Mary Poppins, got in the car, went to school. And then when we got to school, I realized I left everybody's lunch on my dining room table. Oh, my gosh. I had been fast asleep when I had made them at 6 o'clock in the morning because I couldn't remember. That sucks.
Okay, I have one. My nail is just anytime I need to just get Levi. busy for a minute I let him peel carrots and it kills like solid 20 minutes he loves to just shred carrots slowly and show me each skin he lifts it up look mama and just one at a time that's my nail it really comes in handy you're getting really smart with this yeah between this and the fake sitter I feel like that's still working by the way okay my fail the other day I'm in my kitchen and I hear like a really loud I think a ribbit but like louder like a croak and I just tensed up and I'm like holy shit there's a giant huge monster frog in my house And then I heard it again so loud. And I'm like, oh, my God. It's behind the couch in the, like, little play area. It's probably in the toys. Just started getting so scared. And then it's just getting louder and louder.
I'm pacing around. I can't walk back there. I call a neighbor to come over. She was busy. I call another neighbor. They were at work. I call another friend. He says, oh, I can come in an hour. And I'm like, fuck, I need this fixed. There's a huge frog in my house. So I go out in the street. I'm just looking for neighbors to like flag down to come help me get this frog. This is so embarrassing. Frogs aren't even scary. I know. I know. In my mind, it was huge. It was so loud. So I had this vision of like a monster. Frogs only get so big. Girl, I know. I'm just like not nature-y. So anyways, my Whole Foods delivery person rolls up with my groceries. And she's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, I'm so sorry. I really need your help. I'm really scared. There's like a giant frog.
frog in my house and i'm so scared of frogs so she comes in the house and she like gets out her flashlight she's looking under the couch no swear to god she's got like her apron on she's like she's got to be christy the only explanation is she's a lesbian because there's no there is no chance she's looking in the cupboard she empties all the toy bins she's looking oh what a sweetheart she's so so lovely so anyway and then the whole day i'm just avoiding the area garrett comes home and i'm like i'm telling you there's a frog just sit down in silence with me it happens when everything's quiet so we sit in silence on the couch and after 10 minutes croak and i'm like it's there and he's like it's not coming from the toy area it's coming from the kitchen and then we're like looking everywhere and we're fighting about it because i'm like you're second guessing me i know it's in the toy bin anyway it makes them sound again it was a fucking paw patrol walkie talkie oh my god Whole Foods lady? No, guys, I ran into a Whole Foods yesterday, and she's like, did you ever get the frog? And I was like, man, I was hoping I'd never see you again, girl, but it was a fucking talkie. And she gave me the biggest hug, and she was like, you are cute. I knew it was a toy, but you were so scared. I didn't want to say that to your face, but I knew it was a toy. I have two kids, too, and I just knew it. Oh, Chrissy. Okay, well, I've got a story to piggyback on that. Love it. Of course you do. I love it when Hawaii takes over the nail fails. Very different. Okay, go ahead, Ellie. Okay, well, my nail was, I was in Costco today with my kids.
And I just turned the corner down one of the aisles and there was a single man older, who knows, 50s maybe. And I turned down the aisle and I said, oh, excuse us. And he just looked at me, gave me the up and down, gave me a nice wink, like a real wink and raised his eyebrows. You just got picked up on. But instead of having last week's reaction where I was like, fuck you, I'm going to cut your dick off. I was like, hell yeah, I still got it. You were feeling yourself.
I was so like, oh, cool. Okay. You were like, oh, they're my little brothers. Call me later. I could not believe that reaction that I had in myself. I was like, oh, wow. I just got so stoked. Okay. The women's movement has already passed you by. Right. Done. Bye-bye, Matt. Done. Okay. It must be where I am in my cycle. I don't know. She's on division. Is that anything? So my fail. No, my fail. No, Molly thought that was your fail. That was your fail. That was my nail. I looked at it at Costco. That was your nail.
My fail, I was in the mirror, popping my zits or something. And there's no roof above me. And all of a sudden, I feel like a splash down the side of my face, down my cheek. And I'm like, holy shit, what was that? Was that like, did a gecko just shit on me or something? What is that or something on my face? And then I hear the cat and the cat jumps down next to me. And it is.
clawing at a gecko. And then I hear thud, thud, thud, thud, thud, thud. And I look to the left of me and there's this long gecko tail that had been chopped off with the end of it just flopping, flopping, flopping, flopping, flopping. The fucking guts of the gecko tail went down my cheek. Stop.
Allie, this is more than a fail. Yeah, but that's like that skin mask that Critty had on. And just, I was going to take a video for you guys of the tail just going nuts on its own, a mind of its own. So glad you didn't. So glad you didn't. Anyway, so Critty, you thought you had a frog? Yeah. I had a gut down inside my face. It's so good for your, it's good for anti-aging. It's so good. You got anything this week, Sarah?
I'll just give you guys my fail because it's really sad. I was working from home today and my nanny's here and we do a nanny share. So there's like, you know, two babies and the nanny. And I've been just having Christmas. It's like senioritis, but with Christmas, I'm ready for the break to happen. And I'm trying to hang out with the nanny and the babies. And I'm just creeping on her style. And she was just like, okay, we're going to go to the library.
Oh, my God. You're kidding me. Peace me out. Peace me out on your own baby. Yeah. Oh, Sarah, she must hate that you're home. Oh, yeah. She clearly hates it. I mean, do you guys remember when you would babysit? Like, that is – my skin will be crawling. The worst. Like, go away. The worst when the mom's there. Yeah. Wow. So you got dissed by your nanny and baby. I got dissed so hard. I'm sorry, Sarah. Oh, ladies, ladies, ladies. Everybody out there, happy holidays and happy new year. We are so thankful for our listeners. And, girls, I'm real thankful for you.
you too baby girl hey guys don't forget to subscribe to our podcast and follow us on instagram and leave a review happy holidays bye check us out next week for another episode of nursing and cursing where it's safe to admit that you just left your kid in the car to run into ace hardware for five minutes