S4 Ep1: Why Are Feelings and Emotions in a Constant State of Flux?

Nobody lives a perfect life You’ve had both good days and bad days in your life. Like it or not, life has had its ups and downs. Nobody ever experiences just one emotion or feeling. And that’s a good thing. Why? Because you need to experience it all. That’s part of living life. Life is made up of many a paradox and uncountable extremes. But most of life occurs somewhere between any given extremes. Change is a constant inconstant You have experienced change in one form or another all your life. If you’re no longer a child, you’ve changed your body shape, size, hairiness, and more as you aged. What thrilled and motivated you when you were 10 has likely changed – or at least changed in perspective. Change has been with you and a part of you and your life all the time. Change is the one and only constant in the Universe. It is always happening and can’t be stopped. You can choose how it impacts you. Sometimes you can shift it, alter it, avoid it to a degree, and even change it again. This is where the Buddhist ideal of impermanence is super helpful. Feelings and emotions are in your control This is another place where toxic positivity gets it all wrong. The implication that you can ignore, disregard, and put on blinders to all other feelings and emotions in favor of positivity is disingenuous. Things happen that cause a visceral emotional reaction and/or feeling in you that, when it occurs, just is. And it’s different for everyone. That’s because the what of a feeling is different from the how. The what is the label and the how is the presentation. Mostly, the what is the feeling while the how is the emotion. Life is in constant motion One of my favorite quotes from Yoda says, “Always in motion is the future.” No matter what you plan – you have no control over what might occur. Random happenstance might utterly shock and surprise you. The feelings and emotions in that moment just are. And they occurred as part of life’s constant state of motion. While you can choose your feelings and emotions, it’s only possible at this moment, in the here and now. Recognizing and acknowledging the constant state of flux of feelings and emotions empowers you to use mindfulness for control in the present moment. This week’s Applied Guidance for Mindfulness Tool: Here’s how to know what you’re thinking and what and how you’re feeling, right here and now. You need to set aside 5 minutes. Place yourself somewhere comfortable where you’ll be uninterrupted and undistracted. Set a timer for 2 minutes. Start the time. Take as deep a breath in as you can. Hold it for a silent 2 count, then exhale. Repeat until the timer goes off. Ask yourself this question: ·        What am I thinking? Think about it. Then write it down. Now, ask yourself this question: ·        What am I feeling? Think about it. Then write it down. Finally, ask yourself this question: ·        How am I feeling? Think about it. Then write it down. Look over what you’ve written. You are aware of your thoughts and feelings in this moment. This moment is the only moment you can truly, genuinely be self-aware. What has this taught you? Author Website Email Instagram Facebook LinkedIn TikTok Blogs: titaniumdon.com and mjblehart.medium.com Cover artist Fe Mahoney: https://www.etsy.com/shop/TaliasInspirations