S4 Ep2: What Do You Do When the People Who Share Your Heart Don’t Get You?

They love you but they don’t get you My family largely doesn’t get me. They love me, I know that. But they don’t get me. What does that mean? I do things, take approaches to matters, and live in ways that cause them to scratch their heads, wonder how I can possibly be content or happy this way, and probably question my sanity. To thine own self be true I’ve spent a lot of time getting to know myself. Beyond getting to know myself, I’ve spent a lot of time learning to like and even love myself. Not in a conceited way – but in a healthy, self-caring, self-worth way. I had to make a choice. Live my life for me or for them. No disrespect to the people who share my heart – but I had to live for me. I get me, you get you A conversation with my wife – the person other than me who most gets me – sparked this topic. Because I realized we have another shared commonality between us that we’d not recognized or voiced before. My family doesn’t get me. Her family doesn’t get her. The realization of this – in context – is new. But it prompted me to ask this question – when the people who share my heart don’t get me, how do I handle this? The answer has been to continue to get myself. I keep working on being consciously aware – mindful – of who, what, where, how, and why I am. And rather than try to be who they believe I am or should be – I will love them and keep being me, even if they don’t get me. That’s because they don’t need to get me. Just like I don’t need to get them. Or you. You don’t need to get me. You need only to get yourself. Choosing your life paths Recognizing and acknowledging that the people who share my heart – my family – don’t get me, could be seen as a negative. I can only be me, and I can’t think or feel for anyone else. It’s not a negative that the people who share my heart don’t get me – it simply is. Recognizing and acknowledging this has allowed me to embrace my eccentric, weird, geeky self. Rather than keep striving to be someone I’m not, I’m striving to be me. The genuine, authentic, true me that I am. This week’s Applied Guidance for Mindfulness Tool: A huge part of getting yourself is being actively consciously aware – mindful – of yourself. To that end, take this moment to pause. Answer this simple question, right at this moment. What are you doing? Not the overarching goal of your current actions (or things you're putting off, or whatever). I mean right now, asking this question, what are you doing? For example – I’m sitting at my desk, recording this podcast. When you have your answer, I’d like you to reframe it like I’m reframing this. “I’m a human being, sitting at my desk, recording my podcast.” Think about that statement. And with that, how do you feel when you say it aloud? Several times a day for the next week, try this out. Author Website Email Instagram Facebook LinkedIn TikTok Blogs: titaniumdon.com and mjblehart.medium.com Cover artist Fe Mahoney: https://www.etsy.com/shop/TaliasInspirations