Secrets to a Vibrant Life from a Wise 89-Year-Old Author

Did you know that the secrets to a vibrant life may be as close as your bathroom mirror? At 89 years young, James Flaherty has mastered the art of unwrapping every morning like a precious gift. Show Notes | Transcript "You are as old as you think. And if you think old, you get old." - James B. Flaherty In this uplifting episode, I sit down with the former Madison Avenue creative director turned author to explore his secrets for maintaining a bright outlook on life. James and I delve into the importance of defining your true purpose, especially as you age, and why it's crucial to stay engaged with life long after retirement. Discover how to: Confront your inner critic and start each day with positivity Find and pursue your true purpose at any age Embrace your uniqueness and "own your weird" Key insights include: The power of being present, living, giving, and loving Why fear of aging often stems from childhood experiences The importance of maintaining physical health as you age James also shares his perspective on facing life's uncertainties and challenges, drawing from his experience as a caregiver and his adventures living abroad. His curiosity about creating a more civil and courteous world shines through as he encourages small acts of kindness that can make a big difference. Whether you're approaching your golden years or simply seeking to put more joy into your daily life, this conversation offers a refreshing perspective on aging gracefully and living fully. Tune in to learn how to embrace your age and discover why, as James puts it, "You can be better than ever!" Resources: Join the Soulful Women's Network Learn how you can overcome self-doubt and create a thriving business in 30 days with the Align to Shine Academy. Connect with James B. Flaherty: Website: jamesbflaherty.com Connect with Live Love Engage: Send Gloria Grace a message ☕ Support the podcast ❤ Love this episode? Leave us a review and rating LinkedIn: Gloria Grace Rand Facebook: Gloria Grace Rand YouTube: Gloria Grace Rand TRANSCRIPT Namaste. Want to know the secret to waking up happy and staying positive no matter what life throws at you? Well, 89-year-old James Flaherty shows us how he unwraps each day like a gift and keeps his bright outlook on life. Wisdom that served him well from his Madison Avenue days to his latest chapter as an author. But before I bring him on, I want to welcome you to Live Love Engage, especially if you are new to the podcast. I am Gloria Grace, and I help female entrepreneurs attract clients by going beyond traditional search engine optimization techniques to embrace my definition of SEO, spiritually engaging others. So joining us today, as I mentioned, is Jim Flaherty, and he is a former advertising creating, creative director, creator and innkeeper of a legendary country inn in New York, also a conference center, and he's now an author. He writes fiction and nonfiction books and his latest is called Embrace Your Age, You Can be Better Than Ever. And I knew when I, when I met him I had to have him on the show. So I am going to bring him on right now and officially. There we go. Welcome you to Live Love Engage. James B. Flaherty Thank you, Gloria. I'm delighted to be here. Gloria Grace Rand Well, I'm delighted to have you because I just finished reading your book, as a matter of fact, and I loved all the golden wisdom nuggets that you put in there. And I know one of the things you kind of touched on a little bit in the book. Well, maybe not a little bit, but I know when I was promoting this episode, I was talking about something that you sort of consider to be a person's biggest enemy. And I was wondering if you could delve into what exactly that is and how do we conquer it? James B. Flaherty Okay, I'm going to go by, I'm going to assume that all of your listeners have mothers. I had a wonderful mother and she was widowed when I was quite young. And one of the things she taught me, I think I was in college when she, she sat me down. I was maybe 20 years old. And she said, I want you to understand something, that every morning of your life, you're going to have to confront your biggest critic. The most difficult person you know in your life. It's that person in your bathroom mirror. And you can either look at that person and go, good God, another day, or smile bravely and cheerfully and say, good God, another day, and get out there and grab it and go for it. And I know it sounds maybe a little corny, but it's not corny to me. And I still do that at age 89. I really do not ever wake up depressed because I think, good God, I have another day. I have another opportunity to see, hear, taste, touch, speak, share, love. I mean, that's a miracle. So I'm very happy about that. I embrace every day as a gift. Every day is an opportunity to live. And so I get very annoyed when I see people who are retreating from life and doing a horrible statistic. Something like 60 or 70% of people over 65 watch TV 48 hours a week. You know, I want them to get up and to volunteer or do things. Just start living. Gloria Grace Rand Well, absolutely. And let's face it, because we are, you know, we live a lot longer than when, you know, Social Security was first put in place. I mean, at least here in the United States anyway. And so this idea of retiring at 65 doesn't, you know, necessarily work. And so and, actually a lot of people are finding that they want to live longer lives. So when you, when you do come across people like that who aren't really living, you know, besides looking in the mirror, which I loved that idea, giving yourself some, you know, straight talk doing that. How else can we learn to really love and embrace every day as a gift? James B. Flaherty Well, you know, within each of us, Gloria, we all have a goal or a purpose. And I know there's a lot of talk these days, you hear a lot of talk about purpose, but most people don't spend the time to look in, inside of themselves and define their true purpose. I mean, let's face it, we go through so many trend transitions in our life. And we have so many obligations in our lives that we have to live up to. I mean, as a young man in my generation, you know, growing up in the 50s, you knew you would go through school and then you would get a job and be self-supporting. You could not ask your parents to support you and you were not going to move back home. You would get a job and be on your own and you would meet the girl or boy of your dreams and get married and have children. Even though we didn't have a dime, it seemed to be engraved in titanium on our foreheads. That was what we had to do. And I did all that and it was fine. And my obligation was to take care of my wife and our, my babies, my, my darling baby daughters who are now 62 and 64, but still my babies. So those. My whole focus, my purpose in life was to take care of them and to do everything. Maybe in my heart of hearts I wanted to becoming another Hemingway and lock myself in a garret with a bottle of scotch and write a great novel. But I didn't have time for that. I had to earn a living, you know. But as you get older, I mean, I'm going to, I'm going to tell a story about somebody I know. She was a stick of dynamite in her 40s, 50s, and 60s. I mean, very, very important jobs. I'm not going to mention the jobs, but they were big time, big stuff. And she's a wonderful painter besides. And now she's 82 years old and sometimes the body is not kind to you as you get older. But she's not doing anything. She. And she's not even painting. And I say, why are you not painting? Why are you not? Don't get the easel out. She's really a very, very talented painter. And no, I'm busy. I said, busy doing what? Walking the dog. Paying the bills. Not cleaning things as well as they should be cleaned. I mean, I want people to look inside themselves and say, what I really want to do is I want to focus on music or I want to focus on painting or a focus on writing or on reading or on volunteering on doing good things for other people, to help out at the hospital, help out at your church, go to church. You know, nobody goes to church anymore. It's not the. It doesn't have the popularity it had when I was growing up. Now a lot of churches are closing because they, like, church is a business and they can't afford to go on maintaining everything. But I don't know, I just want people to be involved. I want them to wake up and say, hey, I'm still alive and there's a world out there and maybe I can do something to make it better. Gloria Grace Rand Absolutely. James B. Flaherty The best thing. If you can do something to help somebody else, it's great. Gloria Grace Rand Yeah, it really does make a difference. And I, I had an opportunity to do that this week and my husband was very grateful that I was able to help him out. And so I'm very glad that I had that opportunity to be there for him. You know, one of the things you said, and this kind of still goes along with what you're talking about having like that purpose. And in your book, you talked about having to summarize your life in six words. And I loved what you came up with. And I wonder if you could share that with our audience and explain, you know, what's, what's significant about that. James B. Flaherty Yeah, a wonderful. It was a professor somewhere that he, in a webinar, he said, I'm going to give you all five minutes. And in six, you've got to write six words that sums up who you are, what you represent and what you want to be in six words. And I. And I was thinking to myself, see, I'm kind of like, I wish I were as talented as James Michener, the fabulous author who once said, I love this quote, I can't say hello in six pages. So I worked on it, and I came up with something which I still to this day have taped to the bottom of my monitor so that I have