Self-Neglect, Burnout, and a Compassionate Path to Thriving | Hayley Quinn

In this returning conversation on Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m delighted to welcome back Dr Hayley D Quinn for a thoughtful and very grounded exploration of self-neglect, burnout, and what it really means to live with compassion.Hayley is a former clinical psychologist, wellbeing coach, author, and host of the Welcome to Self® podcast. She’s also the past president of Compassionate Mind Australia, and her work sits at the heart of compassion science translated into everyday life.We centre the conversation around Hayley’s upcoming book, From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A Compassionate Guide to Creating a Thriving Life (released 5 February 2026). Together, we unpack what self-neglect actually looks like in day-to-day life, why so many high-achieving and people-pleasing individuals fall into it, and how it quietly erodes wellbeing, relationships, and vitality over time.We explore the three circles model, self-criticism, boundaries, values, sleep, and the micro-moments where compassionate action really counts. Hayley also shares openly about the personal journey of writing the book, and what it was like to live the very principles she was putting on the page.This episode is for anyone who feels stretched, depleted, or stuck in patterns of putting themselves last — and who wants a kinder, more sustainable way forward.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:37 Discussing the New Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion02:00 Understanding Self-Neglect02:34 Micro Moments of Self-Neglect04:15 Impact of Self-Neglect on Relationships and Wellbeing05:33 Burnout Prevention and Compassionate Action06:56 Exploring the Three Circles Model11:03 Self-Criticism and Its Origins13:44 Getting to Know Yourself: Practical Steps20:39 Reconnecting with Values and Hopes26:24 The Challenge of Setting Boundaries28:51 Navigating Relationship Boundaries29:45 Building Self-Trust Through Boundaries30:36 The Importance of Sleep and Self-Care35:08 Compassion and Making Lasting Changes40:27 Writing the Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion48:16 Practical Steps for Self-Compassion52:45 Final Thoughts and ReflectionsLinks:From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A compassionate guide to creating a thriving life.https://drhayleydquinn.com/product/book/ AVAILABLE NOW FOR PRE-ORDER Publishing 6 February 2026Hayley’s website: https://drhayleydquinn.com/Follow Hayley on Instagram: @drhayleydquinnIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/7Ju0I5AIaEo*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:selfcompassion, burnoutprevention, compassionfocusedtherapy, wellbeing, boundaries, mentalhealth, women, genderdiversity