Compassion in a T-Shirt

Most of us think listening is easy. But if we're honest, we often listen with the intention to reply, advise, fix, persuade, or tell our own story.In this follow-up to my recent episode on listening as compassion, I explore what compassionate listening actually looks like in practice. Drawing on ideas from compassion-focused therapy, motivational interviewing, and the work of Carl Rogers, I share seven simple skills that can help us become better listeners in our everyday lives.These aren't just communication techniques. They are ways of creating the kind of safety and understanding that help people feel heard, valued, and less alone.In this video, you'll learn:. Why "No Fixin'" is often the best place to start. How to "Ask, Don't Tell”. Why reflection is one of the most powerful listening skills. How to listen for feelings and deeper meaning. Why silence is often where the real conversation begins. What it means to put your agenda down. Why understanding someone doesn't require agreeing with themWhether you're a therapist, coach, leader, teacher, parent, partner, or friend, these skills can help you have more compassionate and meaningful conversations.As Carl Rogers famously said: "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” Perhaps something similar is true in our conversations. When people feel accepted and understood, they often find their own way forward.I'd love to hear from you in the comments. Which of these listening skills comes most naturally to you? And which one do you find most challenging?Timestamps:00:00 Why Listening Is Compassion00:50 Threat vs Curiosity01:14 Tip 1 No Fixing02:13 Tip 2 Ask Dont Tell04:02 Tip 3 If In Doubt Reflect05:08 Tip 4 Feelings and Meaning07:20 Tip 5 Make Friends With Silence08:16 Tip 6 Put Your Agenda Down09:10 Tip 7 Understand Without Agreeing10:15 Key Takeaways and ClosingLinks:If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/oWHmGIjn4FA*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionatelistening, compassion, selfcompassion, empathy, psychology, communicationskills

After the unexpected death of a dear friend, I found myself doing what many of us do when faced with grief. I tried to stay strong. I tried to carry on. But it wasn't until I sat around a campfire with friends—sharing memories, expressing sadness, and listening to one another—that something began to shift.That experience got me thinking about listening.In a world increasingly shaped by social media algorithms, advertising, political polarisation, and the constant pressure to broadcast our opinions, genuine listening can feel surprisingly rare. Yet being heard remains one of the most powerful human experiences we can offer one another.In this episode, I explore listening as an act of compassion. We journey from ancient oral traditions and Indigenous storytelling, through Socrates, Confucius, Carl Rogers, and motivational interviewing, to consider why listening helps reduce defensiveness, soften threat, create connection, and transform isolation into belonging.Listening doesn't necessarily remove suffering. A grieving friend still grieves. A difficult situation may remain difficult. But when people feel heard, something important happens. We feel less alone. We feel understood. And sometimes, that's where healing begins.Timestamps:00:00 Grief and the urge to hide00:39 Healing through being heard01:39 Listening as the core skill02:07 A world that rewards noise03:08 Listening across history05:20 From waiting to real listening05:56 Carl Rogers and empathy07:20 Compassion begins with listening08:19 How being heard changes us09:57 Listening as a bridge in conflict11:00 Motivational interviewing basics11:40 What compassionate listening sounds like12:35 Why listening matters now13:28 The gift of listeningLinks:If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/5dQZymv8lp8*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:listening, compassion, empathy, psychology, communication, relationships, mentalhealth, wellbeing, connection, selfcompassion

Teacher burnout doesn't just affect teachers—it affects students too.In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl speaks with Clinical Psychologist, educator, researcher, and founder of the Institute for Neuroscience and Education, Dr Rita Princi-Hubbard, about compassionate pedagogy, teacher wellbeing, and the fascinating ways stress and emotional regulation can flow between teachers and students.Drawing on her PhD research and her chapter, Teaching the New Teacher with Compassionate Pedagogy, Rita explains why many teachers enter the profession without sufficient training in child development, emotional regulation, trauma, attachment, and self-compassion. She argues that understanding how people work—not just how students learn—is one of the missing pieces in modern teacher education.The conversation explores the concept of "stress contagion" and the bidirectional relationship between teacher and student wellbeing. Rita shares research showing how teacher stress can influence students, how student distress can affect teachers, and why self-compassion may be one of the most important tools for preventing burnout and creating emotionally safe learning environments.Stan and Rita discuss:• Teacher burnout and the growing pressures facing educators • Stress contagion and emotional co-regulation in the classroom • Why teacher wellbeing matters for student wellbeing • Compassion Focused Therapy and the Three Systems Model • Attachment, trauma, and child development in education • The limits of rewards-and-consequences behaviour management • Self-compassion and receiving support as an educator • Heart rate variability research conducted in real classrooms • Compassionate pedagogy and social justice • What teacher education programs may be missingWhether you're a teacher, school leader, psychologist, parent, student, or simply interested in compassion and education, this conversation offers a compelling vision for how understanding, connection, and compassion can help both teachers and students flourish.Timestamps:00:00 Compassion Meets Education02:11 Why Teacher Training Falls Short03:10 Stress Contagion Explained04:59 Modern Teacher Stressors10:19 Teacher Shame and Self-Doubt12:03 Inside the Research Design15:32 The Eight Module Program19:51 Self-Compassion for Teachers25:39 Receiving Help Without Guilt27:46 Three Systems Model in Classrooms33:18 Beyond Rewards and Consequences37:47 Heart Rate Variability Findings43:14 Compassion and Social Justice44:47 Redesigning Teacher Education47:26 Advice for Burnout Beginners49:43 Closing Reflections and ThanksIf you enjoyed this conversation, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who cares about education, wellbeing, and compassion.Links:Rita Princi-Hubbard’s website:https://www.in-ed.com.au/copy-of-consultingCompassionate Pedagogy in Higher Education: International Perspectiveshttps://www.amazon.com.au/Compassionate-Pedagogy-Higher-Education-International/dp/1911451448/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/D_H0t8YvqMw*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:teacherwellbeing, teacherburnout, compassionatepedagogy, selfcompassion, education, compassionfocusedtherapy

What if therapist burnout isn’t a personal failure, but a consequence of how we train psychologists to relate to themselves?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with clinical psychologist and psychotherapist Tania Kalkidis about therapist burnout, the pressure to “fix” clients, and how modern mental health systems can unintentionally reinforce shame, perfectionism, emotional disconnection, and exhaustion in clinicians themselves.Drawing on psychodynamic psychotherapy, relational therapy, attachment theory, neuroscience, and supervision practice, Tania explores why unconscious processes, defenses, and countertransference are central to effective therapy — not optional extras. We discuss how ignoring the therapist’s own internal experience can lead to resistance, misattunement, self-criticism, discouragement, and burnout for both therapist and client.One of the things I found especially powerful in this conversation was Tania’s emphasis on the hidden shame many therapists carry around not knowing, struggling, or needing support themselves. We talk about emotional safety in supervision, why negative supervisory experiences can become deeply wounding, and how reflective practice and self-awareness are essential for sustainable therapeutic work.Along the way, we explore attachment, epigenetics, implicit memory, social mentalities, emotional safety, and the relational dynamics unfolding moment to moment inside the therapy room. Tania also introduces her “Parallel Realities” model, designed to help clinicians normalise their inner experiences, reduce harsh self-criticism, and reconnect with confidence, curiosity, compassion, and meaning in their work.If you’re a psychologist, therapist, counsellor, supervisor, or mental health practitioner interested in psychodynamic psychotherapy, Compassion Focused Therapy, therapist burnout, attachment theory, unconscious processes, supervision, and the deeper emotional realities of therapeutic work, I think you’ll find a lot in this conversation.Tania also shares details of her free webinar on using Socratic questioning to help therapists move beyond exhaustion and the fixer mindset.Timestamps:00:00 Therapist Burnout And The Fixer Trap02:09 Why Therapists Become Fixers03:56 System Pressures And Training Gaps09:48 Resistance, Pressure, And Client Impact14:54 Modern Psychodynamic Therapy Explained18:23 The Unconscious And Implicit Memory22:15 Attachment, Neuroscience, And Epigenetics26:51 Why The Therapist’s Inner World Matters32:51 The Parallel Realities Model42:14 Emotional Safety In Supervision44:55 Burnout Prevention And Self Reflection49:24 Encouragement For Exhausted Therapists51:52 Webinar And ClosingLinks:Tania Kalkidis’s website:https://deepmindpt.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/ZlfSyMLkHMM *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags: psychology, psychodynamictherapy, therapistburnout, compassionfocusedtherapy, psychotherapy, attachmenttheory

How personal should therapists be?Should helping professionals maintain emotional distance — or is genuine human connection part of what makes therapy healing?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with consultant psychiatrist, writer, and editor Dr Glenn Roberts about one of the most important questions in therapy, psychiatry, and helping work: how much of ourselves should we bring into the room?Beginning with Carl Jung’s powerful idea of the wounded healer — “The doctor is effective only when he himself is affected” — we explore what it really means for clinicians to be touched by the suffering of others without becoming overwhelmed.Glenn offers a rich and compassionate perspective on the bridge between the personal and the professional. We discuss vulnerability, emotional openness, supervision, personal therapy, professional culture, and the difference between healthy boundaries and emotional barriers.This conversation also touches on the depersonalising effects of modern healthcare systems, the unintended costs of highly competitive training cultures, and why warmth, kindness, and compassion may be among the most therapeutic qualities a clinician can bring.We also venture into the emerging world of AI therapy, asking whether something fundamentally human is lost when care becomes entirely impersonal.One especially moving part of the conversation is Glenn’s reflection on the late Mike Shooter — former President of the Royal College of Psychiatrists — whose openness about his own depression became a important source of hope during Glenn’s own difficult period, and helped inspire the creation of his remarkable book, Personally Speaking.If you’re a psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist, doctor, coach, helping professional — or simply interested in compassion, human connection, and what makes healing possible — I think you’ll find a lot in this conversation.In this episode, we explore:• Carl Jung’s wounded healer and what it means in real clinical work• Why being “affected” may be essential to therapeutic effectiveness• Vulnerability, authenticity, and emotional presence in therapy• Professional boundaries vs emotional disconnection• The hidden costs of competitive training cultures• Supervision, personal therapy, and practitioner self-development• Recovery-oriented care and learning from lived experience• Why patients often value kindness more than technical expertise• AI therapy and whether human connection can be simulated• Building warmer, more compassionate teams and servicesTimestamps:00:00 Welcome and the big question00:42 Meet Dr Glenn Roberts and Personally Speaking02:51 Carl Jung and the wounded healer06:51 What does it mean to be “affected”?10:45 Training, vulnerability, and professional culture19:56 Supervision and personal therapy23:09 Boundaries without barriers26:10 AI therapy and the missing human element29:36 Recovery, lived experience, and service-user wisdom36:02 Warmth, compassion, and cultivating better teams42:53 Mike Shooter and a powerful personal story49:40 Practical reflections for cliniciansIf this conversation resonates, please like, subscribe, and share — it helps more people discover these important conversations.Links:Find Dr Roberts’s book Personally Speaking here:https://personally-speaking.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/r7nM12grS-E*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:compassion, psychotherapy, psychology, psychiatry, mentalhealth, woundedhealer

What if the opposite of threat isn’t relaxation… but safeness?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl explores a powerful and often misunderstood idea from Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT): the soothing-affiliative system.Many people think compassion is simply about calming down, relaxing, or “down-regulating” stress. But drawing on Professor Paul Gilbert’s recent writing, Stan argues that compassion is far more alive, relational, and energising than that.Affiliative relationships don’t just soothe our threat system — they can also activate dopamine, oxytocin, and endorphin systems linked to openness, social connection, exploration, play, and vitality.Using the three systems model in Compassion Focused Therapy (threat, drive, and soothing), Stan explores why the opposite of threat may not be relaxation at all — but safeness. And safeness is not merely the absence of danger. It’s the presence of connection.Along the way, Stan reflects on insights from John Bowlby’s attachment theory, Paul Gilbert’s biopsychosocial model, and conversations from Compassion in a T-Shirt with Elaine Beaumont, Chris Irons, and Charlie Heriot-Maitland.This episode explores:. Compassion Focused Therapy explained simply. The three emotion regulation systems. Why compassion is not just soothing. The difference between relaxation and safeness. Attachment, secure base, and emotional connection. Why compassion can feel difficult or threatening. How compassion helps us change our relationship with difficult emotions. Compassion as courage, connection, and flourishingIf you’ve ever found compassion practices unexpectedly difficult—or if you’ve wondered why connection can feel both comforting and vulnerable—this episode is for you.If you enjoy these conversations, please subscribe, leave a comment, or share this video with someone who might find it helpful.Timestamps 00:00 Safeness Feels Alive 01:23 The Three Systems Model 02:13 Affiliation Opens Us 04:23 Safeness, Not Relaxation 04:56 Secure Base to Explore 05:51 The Biopsychosocial Model 07:06 When Compassion Feels Hard 08:17 Learning Safeness Gradually 09:03 Compassion Reorganises Life 09:32 Closing and Subscribe#CompassionFocusedTherapy #SelfCompassion #PaulGilbert #AttachmentTheory #MentalHealth #Psychology

How do we find hope in the current global landscape?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with psychologist and motivational interviewing trainer Denise Ernst for a thoughtful and deeply human conversation about hope — what it is, where it comes from, and why it may be one of the most important yet under-discussed elements of motivational interviewing.Denise describes hope not simply as optimism or positive thinking, but as a kind of living energy that exists alongside compassion, empathy, and love. We explore the idea that hope is not something we “install” into people, but something we help call forth — something already present, even beneath despair, trauma, or self-doubt.Together we discuss deep listening, the fixing reflex, change talk and “hope talk,” the role of equanimity, and how motivational interviewing creates the conditions for hope to emerge through partnership, acceptance, compassion, and empowerment. Denise also reflects on the importance of practitioners staying connected to their own “wellspring” of hope through self-awareness, self-compassion, nature, meditation, yoga, and intentional practice.This conversation moves beyond therapy techniques into something broader and more universal: how we remain connected to goodness, meaning, and possibility in difficult times.[If you enjoyed this conversation, please consider subscribing to the channel, sharing the episode, or leaving a review on your podcast app — it really helps more people discover these conversations on compassion, psychology, and human wellbeing.]Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and Introduction01:53 What Is Hope?05:34 Calling Forth What Is Already There08:46 Trauma, Threat, and Dormant Hope11:19 Discovering Your Own Wellspring of Hope16:00 Hope as a Practice20:39 MI Spirit, Presence, and Deep Listening24:32 Listening for “Hope Talk”30:29 The Fixing Reflex and Backfire35:34 Equanimity and Holding Both Hope and Despair36:10 Hope, Compassion, and the Prism Metaphor42:00 Motivational Interviewing as Human Connection45:41 Self-Compassion for Practitioners47:59 Hope in Difficult Times53:15 Final ReflectionsLinks:Dr Denise Ernst’s website:https://deniseernst.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/zHZ5Caru0aA*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:motivationalinterviewing, hope, compassion, selfcompassion, psychotherapy, mentalhealth

What happens inside your mind when you wake up irritable frustrated…and then start criticising yourself for it?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with clinical psychologist and Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) expert Dr Chris Irons for a reflective, inside-out conversation on shame, self-criticism, and how compassion actually shows up in real life.We begin with a simple but, I suspect, relatable moment—waking up in a bad mood—and follow how threat system activation can cascade through the day, leading to frustration, disconnection, and a second layer of shame and self-criticism. Chris introduces the powerful “three arrows” metaphor (pain, defensive responses, and shame/self-criticism), and shares a vivid analogy of shame as “too much salt,” overpowering our emotional experience.We explore how self-criticism, rumination, and worry can trap us in loops, why awareness can sometimes make things worse, and how cultivating compassionate wisdom, courage, and care can help us respond differently. Chris also shares insights into Compassionate Mind Training (CMT), including the “compassionate ladder,” fears, blocks, and resistances to compassion, and how practices can be tailored to individual differences such as attachment style, shame, and neurodiversity.We also look ahead to emerging research in CFT, including ADHD, hormonal influences, and how technology and personalised approaches may shape the future of compassion-based interventions.This is a more open, less structured, conversation about what it’s actually like to be with our minds, and how we might learn to meet ourselves with compassion. I hope you enjoy it!Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro01:27 Irritable Morning Story03:36 Tricky Minds and Threat Loops07:37 Self Criticism and Shame Spiral12:29 The Three Arrows Explained16:12 Reconnection Needs Courage17:31 Compassion Qualities and Shame Types22:32 Shame as Too Much Salt26:13 Finding Compassion in the Dark28:40 Practice Pathways and Compassion Ladder30:37 Compassion Ladder Basics31:14 Finding Your Best Starting Point32:35 Researching Individual Differences35:58 Neurodiversity and Tailoring CMT36:55 When Compassion Triggers Threat40:29 Fears Blocks and Physiology42:04 ADHD Study and Menstrual Cycle46:49 Assessment Guided Personalisation52:04 Wearables and Daily Practice Choice53:28 Context Triggers and Self Wisdom59:47 What’s Next: Research and Access01:03:18 Spreading CFT Beyond Therapy01:04:15 Closing Thanks and FarewellLinks:Dr Chris Irons’s website:https://drchrisirons.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/mfK3XBCWQWg *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, selfcriticism, shame, mentalhealth, psychology, selfcompassion

What happens when shame keeps someone silent?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with clinical psychologist Dr Eve da Silva about the often hidden impact of online sexual harm — and how shame, self-criticism, and secrecy can leave young people feeling isolated and unable to seek help.Eve shares how her clinical work in CBT began to uncover a pattern: clients presenting with anxiety or low mood were often carrying unspoken experiences such as non-consensual image sharing or distressing online sexual encounters. These experiences were rarely discussed — not because they weren’t important, but because they felt too shameful to name.Drawing on Compassion Focused Therapy, Eve developed a 14-day online self-compassion programme, designed to gently support people in shifting from self-blame to self-understanding. We explore the practices involved — including soothing rhythm breathing, safe space imagery, compassionate writing, and compassionate self exercises — and why even brief interventions can make a meaningful difference.We also discuss the complexity of navigating digital intimacy, the role of peer and cultural pressures, and how shame activates threat responses that block help-seeking. Eve shares findings from her study, where participants showed reduced self-criticism, lower distress, increased self-reassurance, and more openness to seeking help.This is a thoughtful and important conversation about how compassion can help people begin to relate differently to themselves — especially in moments where they might feel most alone.You can find Eve’s free resources here: https://compassionhelps.com/resourcesTimestamps:00:00 Welcome and Topic01:33 Why This Research06:51 Online Norms and Pressure12:32 Shame and Silence16:51 Designing the Program23:18 Making It Human26:38 Study Results and Outcomes35:41 Supporting Youth Compassionately42:02 Micro Anchors Explained46:03 What’s Next and Wrap-UpLinks:Find Eve da Silva on Instagram:@drevedasilvaIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/twLUB3Ma118*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassion focused therapy, self compassion, shame, online harm, mental health, help seeking

What really drives elite performance — discipline, self-criticism, or something deeper? In this episode, I explore psychological flexibility, self-compassion, and high performance with Olympian Toby Jenkins.In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Toby Jenkins — Olympian, entrepreneur, speaker, and coach — to explore leadership, high performance, and the inner world that shapes both.Toby is also my cousin, so this was a really special conversation for me. He shares a deeply personal and powerful account of his Olympic journey, describing the yin–yang of high performance — the highs and lows, pride and disappointment, confidence and doubt, and even moments of shame.We talk openly about self-criticism — how it can drive performance, but also how it can become harsh and unhelpful. Toby reflects on the intense pressure of elite sport, and how that inner voice shaped his experience along the way.One of the most powerful moments in the conversation is a story from his early days at the Australian Institute of Sport, where a simple act of kindness — a teammate offering him an old team t-shirt — had a profound and lasting impact. It’s a beautiful example of compassion in action.Toby also shares how discovering Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and the science of psychological flexibility transformed his understanding of mindset. Rather than trying to eliminate stress or control emotions, he now focuses on opening up to discomfort, being present, and taking values-based action.In our conversation, we explore:- The double-edged nature of self-criticism in high performance- Why confidence can be unreliable — and competence is built through reps- How athletes and leaders can respond differently to pressure, fear, and doubt- The role of compassion and self-compassion in resilience and growth- How psychological flexibility applies across sport, business, and everyday lifeThis is a really rich, practical, and deeply human conversation about what it means to perform, lead, and live well — even when things are tough.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome And Guest Intro01:46 Cousins Reunite On Air02:39 Olympic Highs And Lows07:20 AIS Grind And Self Doubt09:00 Humiliated At Selection Camp12:25 The T Shirt Kindness Moment14:55 Pay It Forward Lessons19:12 Compassion Defined In Practice21:52 Reframing Coach With Compassion27:30 Inner Critic And Pain As Fuel30:02 When Self Criticism Helps Or Hurts32:12 Constructive vs Shame Critic33:22 Owning Pressure Out Loud35:46 Acceptance Price of Entry37:27 Finding ACT in Crisis38:49 Work Identity Wake Up44:23 Mindset Shift in Leaders47:08 Confidence vs Competence Reps53:58 Compassion Validation and Choice59:17 Wholeness Yin Yang Wrap01:00:36 Closing Thanks and FarewellLinks:Toby Jenkin’s website:https://www.tobyajenkins.com/ Toby’s LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/tobyjenkins/ If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/KczGMCNSorQ *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:compassion, selfcompassion, psychologicalflexibility, highperformance, leadership, mentalhealth

Why do we self-sabotage, criticise ourselves, or even create chaos in our own lives — sometimes right when things matter most?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with clinical psychologist Dr Charlie Heriot-Maitland to explore his powerful new book Controlled Explosions in Mental Health. Together, we unpack a surprising and compassionate idea: that many of the things we struggle with — procrastination, self-criticism, pessimism, even self-harm — may actually be our brain’s way of protecting us from something it views as even more painful.Charlie introduces the concept of “controlled explosions” — targeted, self-directed harms designed to prevent bigger feared threats like rejection, failure, humiliation, or retraumatisation. Drawing on evolutionary psychology and Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT), we explore how understanding these patterns can reduce shame and help us relate to our minds in a more compassionate and effective way.Along the way, Charlie and I reflect on our own experiences of writing and publishing books — and how self-sabotage can show up in surprisingly subtle ways, like procrastinating near the finish line or even holding back from promoting something we care deeply about. These moments bring the theory to life, showing how these “protective” processes can quietly shape our choices, often in ways we don’t immediately recognise.We also dive into the idea of the “bomb squad” — different parts of the mind (like the procrastinator, pessimist, or inner critic) that step in to protect us — and why trying to simply “get rid” of these patterns often leads to more struggle. Instead, Charlie outlines a compassionate approach of noticing, understanding, and helping — turning towards the underlying fears rather than fighting the symptoms.This is a thoughtful and deeply relatable conversation about why our minds work the way they do — and how compassion can help us work with our minds, rather than against them. Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro02:05 New Book Overview02:46 Controlled Explosions Metaphor06:46 Eureka Origin Story08:56 Evolution and Deshaming11:26 Bomb Squad Characters13:46 Self Sabotage Unit22:29 Self Criticism Unit28:56 Whack a Mole and Root Causes33:24 Parts Work and Personifying36:48 Continuum and Common Humanity41:03 Compassionate Practice Tools48:16 Therapy Applications and ClosingLinks:Dr Charlie Heriot-Maitland’s website:https://charlieheriotmaitland.com/Relating to Voices Using CFT (Heriot-Maitland & Longden, 2022)https://charlieheriotmaitland.com/books/relating-to-voices-using-compassion-focused-therapy/Controlled Explosions in Mental Health (Heriot-Maitland, 2026)https://charlieheriotmaitland.com/books/controlled-explosions-in-mental-health/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: [link] *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, selfsabotage, selfcriticism, mentalhealth, psychologypodcast, compassion

What is it like to encounter Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) for the very first time — not in a textbook, but in a real clinical service, working with people whose threat systems are truly activated?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Tiffany Luxford, an undergraduate psychology student working at the Anxiety Disorders Residential Unit at the South London and Maudsley NHS Foundation Trust. Tiff shares a fresh, thoughtful, and deeply human perspective on what it’s like to step into a compassionate clinical environment — and how that experience begins to shape the kind of clinician she hopes to become.We explore how compassion shows up not just in therapy, but in team culture — creating safeness, reducing burnout, and supporting both staff and clients. Tiff offers insights into how CFT is used alongside CBT for conditions like OCD and body dysmorphic disorder, including working with shame, self-criticism, and fears of self-compassion.What makes this conversation especially powerful is Tiff’s willingness to reflect on her own lived experience of recovery from an eating disorder and OCD — and how compassion might have changed that journey. She also shares reflections from her newly released TEDx talk, where she speaks about uncertainty, recovery, and the courage it takes to move toward change.This is a conversation about beginnings — about learning compassion, living it, and slowly becoming it.Watch Tiff’s TEDx talk: What recovery taught me about fear | Tiffany Luxford | TEDxKingsCollegeLondonhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlFHrSPw1kUTimestamps:00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro02:17 First Encounter With CFT06:18 Team Compassion Culture10:09 Formulating Anxiety in CFT12:42 ERP With Self Compassion16:23 Shame and Self Criticism19:01 Small Shifts in Recovery24:22 Lived Experience and Recovery28:35 TEDx Talk and Uncertainty32:29 Designing Compassionate Services34:54 Advice for New Clinicians37:27 Closing Thanks and Wrap UpLinks:Watch Tiff’s TEDx talk: What recovery taught me about fear | Tiffany Luxford | TEDxKingsCollegeLondonhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlFHrSPw1kUIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/WIeC6JOdZKU *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:compassion focused therapy, self compassion, anxiety treatment, OCD recovery, early career psychologist, mental health education

What if compassion isn’t just something we feel—but something we can train?In this conversation, I sit down with social psychologist Associate Professor Paul Condon to explore his new book How Compassion Works (with John Makransky) and their evidence-based approach to Sustainable Compassion Training (SCT).We dive into a powerful idea: that we already have an innate capacity for love, compassion, and wisdom—but life experiences, attachment patterns, and our tendency to get caught in thoughts can pull us away from it.Paul shares a clear, practical framework for reconnecting with that capacity through three key modes of practice:. Receptive mode – learning to take in care and reconnect with a “secure base”. Deepening mode – shifting from reactive thinking to expansive awareness. Inclusive mode – widening compassion beyond our usual limitsWe also explore how to develop a “holding environment” for difficult emotions, the difference between love and compassion, and how this approach can help prevent burnout, empathic distress, and compassion fatigue.If you’ve ever struggled to stay compassionate without feeling overwhelmed—or wondered how compassion actually develops—this is a deeply insightful and practical conversation.Timestamps00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro02:31 Innate Compassion Explained05:59 Why We Lose Touch13:20 Equanimity and Holding Space17:56 Love vs Compassion23:14 Sustainable Compassion Training28:43 Receptive Mode Field of Care33:09 When Care Feels Inaccessible40:28 Deepening Mode Expansive Awareness49:37 Inclusive Mode Widening the Circle58:27 Avoiding Burnout and Distress01:05:21 Motivation and Daily Practice01:10:48 Closing Thoughts and ThanksLinks:Dr Paul Condon’s website:https://paulcondon.org/How Compassion Works (Makransky & Condon, 2025)https://www.amazon.com.au/How-Compassion-Works-Step-Step/dp/164547173X/Sustainable Compassion Training: Integrating Meditation Theory With Psychological Science (Condon & Makransky, 2020) Open Access article from Frontiers in Psychology.https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.02249/full If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/8zBzKtw25ew *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:compassion training, mindfulness meditation, compassion fatigue, self compassion, psychology and wellbeing, burnout prevention

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with psychotherapist Dr Elaine Beaumont to explore the growing pressures facing young adults — especially university students — and how self-criticism, shame, and burnout are shaping their mental health.We discuss how social media, comparison, and constant connectivity are impacting young people’s inner worlds, and why kindness may be a powerful starting point for change. Elaine shares insights from her clinical work, her research on self-compassion and burnout, and her experience teaching students in the helping professions.We also explore the difference between kindness and compassion, how Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) can help people work with self-criticism, and how practical tools like The Kindness Workbook and the Self-Compassion App are helping people build compassion in everyday life.And toward the end, we meet Roy — a therapy dog bringing compassion to life in a very real and embodied way.Key Topics:. Self-criticism and shame in young adults. Student burnout and mental health. Social media and comparison. Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT). Kindness vs compassion. Self-compassion app and research. Animal-assisted therapy and wellbeingIf you’re interested in self-compassion, student wellbeing, burnout, or how to work with your inner critic, this conversation is for you.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and guest intro03:06 Young adults under pressure06:53 Social media comparison trap10:14 Role models and playfulness14:36 Algorithms and world anxiety18:44 Perfectionism and burnout23:36 Self-compassion app insights27:06 Kindness workbook and values30:18 Kindness starts within31:38 Kindness versus compassion32:46 Inside the Kindness Workbook33:31 Kindness Crusaders artwork35:17 Korea recognition and reach36:44 When kindness becomes compassion38:56 Fear blocks to self-compassion42:52 Self-compassion app results47:12 Roy and therapy dog work53:56 Dogs as compassionate friends56:04 Final thanks and resourcesLinks:Dr Elaine Beaumont’s website:https://beaumontpsychotherapy.co.uk/The Kindness Workbook (Beaumont & Welford, 2021)https://www.hachette.com.au/elaine-beaumont-mary-welford/the-kindness-workbook-creative-and-compassionate-ways-to-boost-your-wellbeingThe Compassionate Mind Workbook (Irons & Beaumont, 2017)https://www.hachette.com.au/chris-irons-elaine-beaumont/the-compassionate-mind-workbook-a-step-by-step-guide-to-developing-your-compassionate-selfThe Self-Compassion Apphttps://beaumontpsychotherapy.co.uk/self-compassion-app/Evaluating the impact the Self-Compassion App has on levels of compassion, psychological distress and well-being (Beaumont et al., 2024)https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/capr.12841A Qualitative Study Exploring the Impact the Self-Compassion App Has on Levels of Compassion, Self-Criticism, and Wellbeing (Beaumont et al., 2022)https://www.lidsen.com/journals/icm/icm-07-03-045Roy the Labradorhttps://www.instagram.com/walkswithroy/Social media age restrictions hubhttps://www.esafety.gov.au/about-us/industry-regulation/social-media-age-restrictions-hub Early wins for the social media ban, new survey claims. But the full picture is far more complicated (Sawyer & Lin, 2026)https://theconversation.com/early-wins-for-the-social-media-ban-new-survey-claims-but-the-full-picture-is-far-more-complicated-278768If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/nU9b-mfYKVg *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:selfcompassion, studentmentalhealth, compassionfocusedtherapy, burnoutrecovery, kindnessmatters, mentalhealthsupport

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Dr Lillian Ward from the Contemplative Studies Centre at the University of Melbourne about what “progress” in meditation really looks like beyond beginner programs — including the positive changes people hope for and the genuine challenges that can arise along the way.Meditation is often promoted for its benefits, such as improved wellbeing, emotional regulation, and greater self-awareness. But what actually happens as people continue meditating over months and years? How do experienced meditation teachers recognise when practice is going well — and when it might not be?Lillian describes her Delphi study with experienced meditation teachers from both secular mindfulness programs (MBSR, MBCT, MiCBT) and Buddhist traditions including Theravada and Zen. Using a multi-round consultation process, the study draws on the expertise of teachers to better understand the many psychological, emotional, and relational changes that can emerge through meditation practice.Teachers in the study identified 97 meaningful changes they use to assess how their students are progressing. These include positive developments such as greater emotional awareness, openness, and self-compassion, but also potential difficulties such as relationship strain, increased rumination, neglecting responsibilities, or experiences that can interfere with everyday functioning.Lillian also explains a pathway model of meditation progress, where ongoing practice builds attentional skills and introspection. These can open the door to both growth and difficulty depending on how the experiences that arise are understood and responded to.Towards the end of our conversation, Lillian introduces a major new research project called Tracking Meditation: A Longitudinal Study, which is currently recruiting meditation practitioners. This two-year study aims to follow newer meditators over time to better understand how meditation practice develops and how it affects wellbeing in everyday life.If you’re interested in mindfulness, meditation research, contemplative science, or the psychology of meditation practice, I hope you enjoy the conversation.Timestamps:00:00 Meditation Journey Intro02:16 Why Progress Matters04:07 Delphi Study Explained06:01 Study Design Breakdown09:08 Key Changes Teachers See12:09 Self-Compassion and Relationships16:33 Pathways Model of Progress22:32 Traditions and Measuring Change26:13 When Practice Goes Wrong30:53 Managing Adverse Experiences36:02 Tracking Meditation Longitudinal Study40:29 Recruiting and Closing ThanksLinks:Tracking Meditation: A Longitudinal Studyhttps://psychologicalsciences.unimelb.edu.au/CSC/research/research-studies/tracking-meditation-a-longitudinal-studyIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/X59owqIZBZo *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:mindfulness, meditation, contemplativescience, meditationresearch, selfcompassion, mentalhealth

Compassion in healthcare is more than a value statement — it is a clinical skill, a leadership stance, and a systemic responsibility. In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with psychiatrist Caragh Behan (Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland) and Professor Brendan Kelly (Trinity College Dublin) about burnout, moral injury, empathy fatigue, and how to make compassion real in modern evidence-based healthcare systems.Together, Caragh and Brendan have written the Handbook of Compassion in Healthcare, a practical and research-informed guide that explores compassion from neuroscience to self-compassion, resilience, and compassionate leadership. The book is available to purchase in hard copy — and importantly, it is also available open access, reflecting their belief that compassion should be accessible to all.In this conversation, we explore:• The pressures of evidence-based medicine, service targets, and performance metrics• A powerful pandemic-era story of a suicidal young man who felt unseen at his most vulnerable• The quiet presence of fear in clinical work — fear of mistakes, complaints, and uncertainty• Why compassion is best understood as awareness of suffering plus the motivation to act• The crucial differences between empathy, sympathy, pity, and what they call “horrified anxiety”• Why “compassion fatigue” may be more accurately described as empathy fatigue• Moral injury and what happens when clinicians are forced to act against their core values• Self-compassion as the foundation for sustainable, courageous care• Practical strategies — pausing, grounding, touch, intention-setting, and deep listening• How to build compassionate health systems, not just compassionate individualsThis conversation moves from the inner world of the clinician to the wider organisational and systemic context of healthcare. We discuss how compassion can be cultivated, trained, and protected — even in overstretched environments — and why always and everywhere, compassion matters.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and Guests02:30 Why Compassion Now03:04 System Pressures and Stories06:40 Compassion Across Specialties08:28 Fear and Clinical Uncertainty11:03 Defining Compassion11:50 Empathy Sympathy and Pity15:01 Compassion Fatigue Reframed18:28 Courage and Patient Autonomy23:51 Can Compassion Be Taught25:09 Book and Open Access25:56 Moral Injury Explained28:18 Self Compassion Basics30:22 System Pressures vs Self Care32:46 Two Strands of Change37:04 Compassionate Intention39:29 Can Compassion Be Trained44:28 One Small Practice Tomorrow49:00 Always Compassion Matters51:45 Closing Thanks and LinksIf you work in healthcare, mental health, leadership, or any caring profession — this episode will resonate deeply.Links:Handbook of Compassion in Healthcare (Behan and Kelly, 2025)https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/handbook-of-compassion-in-healthcare/4B98BECD58FAA99F62F8C4B0BB39663DIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/oo8AVwVSTk4 *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:compassion in healthcare, healthcare burnout, moral injury, self compassion, compassionate leadership, empathy fatigue

What if burnout isn’t a personal failure — but a cultural signal?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Natalia Sarro, an Argentinian psychologist based in Barcelona, Compassion Focused Therapy practitioner, and the first certified Spanish-speaking instructor with the Center for Compassionate Leadership.Natalia shares how her own identity became deeply tied to performance — and how that journey led her to support leaders navigating burnout, chronic stress, perfectionism and self-criticism. Together, we explore workplaces as “emotional laboratories,” where belonging, worth and power are constantly being negotiated.We discuss psychological safety and why high-performing teams are built not on fear, but on environments where people feel safe to speak up, disagree, admit mistakes and ask for help. Natalia explains the powerful distinction between leading with compassion and leading for compassion — shaping systems that reduce burnout and exclusion.We also explore gender socialisation, fierce self-compassion, internalised self-criticism, and how women leaders can reclaim grounded authority and voice without losing warmth or strength.Finally, Natalia introduces her idea of “cathedral thinking” — leadership as long-arc culture building that may outlast us.This is a rich and reflective conversation about burnout, identity, leadership, and building compassionate workplaces that sustain people rather than exhaust them.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro02:03 Natalia’s Work Journey05:08 Identity Performance Burnout05:59 Women Burnout and Bias08:07 Vision for Compassionate Work11:14 Psychological Safety Explained14:21 Leading With and For16:52 Spanish Cultural Translation21:10 Compassion Misconceptions at Work24:25 Fierce Self Compassion for Women30:42 Gendered Double Standards38:39 Vulnerability and Inner Critic44:46 Self Compassion Shapes Culture47:23 Cathedral Thinking Closing47:51 Final Thanks and FarewellLinks:Natalia’s website:https://nataliasarro.com/Natalia’s Instagram page:https://www.instagram.com/nataliasarro/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/v1i1pWcE9JM *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionate leadership, workplace wellbeing, burnout recovery, psychological safety, self compassion, women in leadership

Menopause is one of the most significant transitions in a woman’s life — and yet it’s often ignored, misunderstood, or reduced to stereotypes about hormones and hot flushes. But menopause is not just biological. It’s psychological. It affects sleep, mood, identity, relationships, work, and wellbeing.In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Dr Lydia Brown, Senior Lecturer in Psychological Sciences at the University of Melbourne and a leading researcher on self-compassion and menopause.Dr Brown explains what menopause actually is (including perimenopause and timing), why research historically lagged, and how the Women’s Health Initiative reshaped conversations around hormone replacement therapy (HRT). We explore how menopause intersects with midlife pressures — caregiving, career demands, grief, identity shifts — and how self-compassion can act as a powerful buffer.Drawing on data from over 500 Australian women, Lydia shares research showing that self-compassion can reduce the burden of hot flushes, protect against depression, support treatment adherence, and predict wellbeing — sometimes more strongly than symptom severity itself.We also discuss:• Why women often struggle with self-compassion• The myth that self-compassion is selfish• How menopause shows up in the workplace• Brain fog and what the research really says• Organisational policy (including menopause leave)• Positive ageing and the “paradox of ageing”• Practical tools — including the simple question: “What do I need right now?”Whether you’re experiencing menopause, supporting someone who is, or simply interested in resilience and healthy ageing, this conversation offers grounded, evidence-based insight.Timestamps:00:00 Menopause Is More Than Hot Flushes: Why This Transition Matters00:23 Meet Dr Lydia Brown + What We’ll Cover02:01 Menopause 101: What It Is, Perimenopause, Timing & Symptom Range04:55 Why the Science Lagged: Women Excluded, Complexity & Variability06:21 HRT’s Rise, the WHI Shockwave, and Where the Evidence Sits Now08:50 Beyond Hormones: Identity Shifts & Midlife Pressures13:05 Why Self-Compassion? Lydia’s Personal Path17:34 Blocks to Self-Compassion: Socialisation & Self-Criticism24:15 Support Systems First: Doctors, Therapy & Community27:03 Self-Compassion as a Buffer for Hot Flushes29:38 Why Self-Compassion Predicts Wellbeing33:32 Self-Compassion and CBT: Mechanisms Explained37:55 Menopause at Work: Brain Fog & Career Impact46:21 Positive Ageing & the Paradox of Growing Older50:26 Practical Takeaways: “What Do I Need Right Now?”55:20 Closing ReflectionsLinks:For Dr Brown’s contact, research papers and media work, go to her website at The University of Melbourne:https://findanexpert.unimelb.edu.au/profile/21045-lydia-brownIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/m4_AwOcXNLk*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:self-compassion, menopause support, perimenopause, healthy aging, women’s mental health, workplace wellbeing, resilience psychology, hormone therapy, midlife transition

Have you ever worked in a team where something went wrong — and you could feel the difference between blame and support?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl speaks with Professor Helena Nguyen about workplace compassion as a team- and organisation-level capability, not just an individual trait.Interest in compassion at work has grown rapidly — driven by burnout, faster and leaner workplaces, the impact of COVID-19, and the rise of AI prompting questions about what remains uniquely human at work. Helena explains why focusing only on individual compassion can create blame and unsustainable expectations, especially in high-pressure environments like healthcare.We explore:. Why workload weakens the impact of compassionate care. What team compassion actually looks like in day-to-day work. How team mindfulness enables shared awareness and coordinated support. The role of shared mental models (think “soccer team” sync under pressure). Why compassion improves psychological safety, speaking up, learning, and patient safety. Research linking compassionate care to better treatment outcomes and even mortality rates. The hidden cost of “just be compassionate” cultures — burnout and workforce loss. Organisational barriers: mindset, culture, systems, incentives, and leadership. Practical starting points: self-compassion, mindfulness, emotional intelligence, difficult conversations, and circles of control. We also discuss the future of compassion research — moving beyond heroic individual narratives toward team compassion and compassionate organising, and normalising vulnerability, grief, and suffering in professional life.. Compassion isn’t a “nice to have.” It’s a strategic necessity — good for people, teams, and performance.This conversation draws on the recent special issue on compassion in organisations in the Australian Journal of Management. The link to the special issue is in the description below.Timestamps00:00 Compassion at Work: Why Teams Matter01:58 Burnout, COVID & the New Work Reality04:03 AI & the Future of Human Skills07:21 The Risks of Blaming Individuals10:23 Self-Compassion at Work12:16 What Team Compassion Looks Like15:24 Team Mindfulness & Shared Awareness22:24 When Competition Kills Compassion23:42 Compassion, Performance & Patient Safety29:22 The Hidden Cost of “Just Be Compassionate”32:46 Organisational Barriers to Compassion38:02 Practical Starting Points46:37 The Future: Team Compassion & Compassionate Organising48:57 Vulnerability, Grief & Humanity at WorkLinks:For the Special Issue in the Australian Journal of Management got here:https://journals.sagepub.com/toc/auma/50/3?_gl=1*1yyxzqx*_up*MQ..*_ga*NjY2MDQ2ODg0LjE3NzEyMjA3NjU.*_ga_60R758KFDG*czE3NzEyMjg1MjQkbzIkZzAkdDE3NzEyMjg1MjQkajYwJGwwJGgxMzczNTQ3NjgxFor more about Professor Helena Nguyen go here:https://profiles.sydney.edu.au/helena.nguyen If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/eyKJZewU2yw *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:workplace compassion, team compassion, psychological safety, compassionate leadership, patient safety, organisational culture

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Margaret Cullen, a licensed psychotherapist and one of the true pioneers of bringing mindfulness and compassion into mainstream psychology, healthcare, and community settings.Margaret was among the first teachers certified in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, has taught internationally for decades, and spent over 30 years supporting people living with cancer and their loved ones. She co-developed Compassion Cultivation Training at Stanford, founded Compassion Corps to bring compassion programs to underserved communities, and has helped shape how contemplative practices are taught across the world.Our conversation centres on Margaret’s beautiful new book, Quiet Strength, which explores equanimity not as detachment, numbness, or emotional suppression, but as a steady, wise presence that allows us to stay open, engaged, and human — without being hijacked by reactivity.We explore what equanimity really is (and what it isn’t), how it shows up in the body and nervous system, how it supports compassion without overwhelm or pity, and why “broken-hearted equanimity” may be one of the most important capacities for living in uncertain, polarised, and painful times.This is a grounded, thoughtful conversation about calm strength, embodiment, and how we can meet life as it actually is.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:13 Introducing Margaret Cullen and her work01:04 What is equanimity? Introducing Quiet Strength03:50 Common misunderstandings about equanimity05:32 Equanimity, emotional balance, and recovery09:32 Mindfulness and equanimity: how they overlap22:21 Margaret’s early journey with MBSR25:23 The body and nervous system in equanimity28:27 Bottom-up equanimity and embodied practice31:37 Interrupting rumination and hyperarousal34:34 Fears, blocks, and resistance to equanimity37:03 Equanimity in relationships and real life40:01 Nonviolent resistance and quiet strength45:51 Broken-hearted equanimity47:44 Equanimity as a support for compassion52:31 Clinical and therapeutic applications54:06 Closing reflectionsLinks:Margaret Cullen’s website with links to the book, training, and other resourceshttps://margaretcullen.com/More on Quiet Strength from the publishers:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/quiet-strength-margaret-cullen?variant=43897021300770 If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/ggNPCYd7awQ*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:equanimity, compassion, mindfulness, emotionalresilience, contemplativepsychology, quietstrength

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Douglas Smith, Professor of Social Work at the University of Illinois at Urbana–Champaign, Director of the Center for Prevention Research and Development, and a long-standing member of the Motivational Interviewing Network of Trainers.Doug and I explore his 2025 book Motivational Interviewing with Families, which re-imagines how Motivational Interviewing (MI) can be applied when working with couples, parents and children, and wider family systems. Rather than treating MI as something done with one person while others observe, Doug invites us to think systemically, relationally, and compassionately about how change unfolds across conversations with families.We discuss how MI spirit shows up in family work, why reflective listening is the engine of MI, and Doug’s bold re-ordering of the core skills into ROARS (Reflections, Open questions, Affirmations, Reflective Summaries). We also unpack key innovations from the book, including family-level change talk, family-level equipoise, motivational send-offs, and the risks of the “superfluous engagement trap.”This conversation will be especially valuable for psychologists, social workers, counsellors, and health practitioners who use MI and want to deepen their work with families, as well as anyone interested in compassion-focused, evidence-based approaches to change.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:13 Meet Professor Doug Smith00:32 Doug’s clinical and research background01:12 Why Motivational Interviewing with families01:49 What counts as “family work”?03:40 Why MI becomes more complex in family systems07:09 What MI with families actually looks like in practice18:13 Why reflections matter most in MI18:22 ROARS and re-ordering MI core skills21:27 Family-level reflections25:02 Navigating complexity in family systems28:17 Teaching and training MI30:45 Reflections as the engine of MI33:00 Autonomy and differing family goals34:07 Challenges in family counselling38:30 Family-level equipoise42:25 Change talk in family contexts47:26 Engaging reluctant family members49:55 Balancing engagement and planning01:00:52 Motivational send-offs and ending well01:04:06 The future of MI with familiesLinks:Motivational Interviewing with Families by Douglas C. Smith (2025)https://www.guilford.com/books/Motivational-Interviewing-with-Families/Douglas-Smith/9781462557615 Professor Doug Smith website with academic referenceshttps://socialwork.illinois.edu/directory/profile/smithdc/ If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/YZ0Rp_EkIdA *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:MotivationalInterviewing, FamilyTherapy, CompassionInPractice, ChangeTalk, MITraining, FamilySystems

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by psychologists, writers, and podcasters Emma Waddington and Chris McCurry, the voices behind the podcast Life’s Little Secrets.Emma and Chris and I talk about how they first met and began working together, what drew them into collaboration, and how a shared curiosity about the inner lives of humans led to the creation of Life’s Little Secrets. We explore the cost of hiding our thoughts and feelings, the relief that can come from being heard, and the role compassion plays in helping us live with vulnerability rather than shame.We also spend time talking about their work writing for children and families, including their ACT-based workbooks and story-driven books that help young people (and their parents) make sense of big emotions like anxiety, sadness, frustration, and disappointment. Throughout the conversation, Emma and Chris share wisdom drawn from therapy, writing, podcasting, and life — thoughtful, grounded, and deeply human.This is a wide-ranging, reflective conversation about common humanity, emotional courage, and what can change when we feel understood rather than judged.Timestamps00:00 Introduction and welcome01:46 How Emma and Chris first met and began working together06:26 The privilege of psychological work and seeing our shared humanity11:58 Why Life’s Little Secrets — and what we hide19:15 The psychological cost of keeping things hidden29:35 The power of being heard and meeting vulnerability with compassion30:52 Introducing the ACT workbook series for children31:57 Story-driven approaches to anxiety, sadness, and frustration35:04 Big Issues for Little People: helping families navigate tough questions39:31 Story, illustration, and empathy40:31 Disappointment, big feelings, and making room for what is42:07 Learning, growth, and being a lifelong student of humanity45:37 Developing a compassionate relationship with ourselves51:14 Final reflections and words of wisdomLinks:For Dr Waddington’s contact, books, resources and trainings, go to her website:https://www.dremmawaddington.com/For Dr McCurry’s contact, books, resources and trainings, go to his website:https://chrismccurrychildpsychologist.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/CWmvqb0KpDw*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassion, selfcompassion, mentalhealth, psychology, humansbeinghuman, lifessecrets

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Rob Brockman, clinical psychologist, Schema Therapy practitioner, supervisor, and trainer.This is not a beginner’s introduction to Schema Therapy. Instead, Rob and I take a deeper, more nuanced look at how Schema Therapy understands the mind through modes — the vulnerable, angry, detached, critical, and healthy states we move in and out of — and why differentiating these experiences matters clinically.Rob unpacks how modes show up in the therapy room through behaviour, thoughts, felt sense, and motivation, and why understanding the function of anger, anxiety, and coping is so central to effective work. We explore how anger can take very different forms across modes — from unmet needs, to self-criticism, to protection, dominance, or complaint — and why working only with coping modes can inadvertently keep clients stuck.A key theme throughout our conversation is the importance of getting beneath coping and protection to make contact with vulnerability, pain, and unmet needs — and how attunement, empathic confrontation, and limited reparenting help make that possible. Rob also reflects on the Healthy Adult mode, its role in regulating emotion, meeting needs, and setting limits, and where compassion naturally fits within this framework.We then turn to integration. Drawing on his work in Contextual Schema Therapy, Rob shares how compassion-focused ideas and practices can be thoughtfully integrated into Schema Therapy — not as a separate model, but as skills that help strengthen the Healthy Adult and support healing from shame, guilt, and self-criticism.If you’re a clinician curious about Schema Therapy, a therapist working with parts, modes, or multiplicity, or simply interested in how compassion can be embodied in deep, relational therapeutic work, I think you’ll really enjoy this one.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction01:39 Understanding Schema Therapy Modes04:15 Modes in Practice: Recognizing and Working with Modes12:18 Exploring Anger in Schema Therapy22:52 Practical Applications and Challenges32:49 Understanding the Root of Anger33:33 Analyzing TV Show 'Run' for Psychological Insights36:27 Exploring Personal Triggers and Emotional Responses42:30 The Role of Healthy Adult Mode in Behavior Regulation47:57 Integrating Compassion in Schema Therapy57:17 Upcoming Trainings and ResourcesLinks:Firstly that (Exhaustive) Mode Paper: https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.763670/fullLive Schema Therapy Training Australia, New Zealand, and Bali: https://schematherapytraining.com/Online Schema Therapy Training Platform: https://www.schematherapytrainingonline.com/Schema Therapy Solution Course for Everyday Living: https://www.schematherapysolution.com/Free What's the Schemata Podcast with Chris Hayes & Rob Brockman: https://schematherapytraining.com/podcast-whats-the-schemataIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/bz8llMn85xM*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:schematherapy, schema modes, vulnerablechild, healthyadult, compassion, selfcompassion

In this returning conversation on Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m delighted to welcome back Dr Hayley D Quinn for a thoughtful and very grounded exploration of self-neglect, burnout, and what it really means to live with compassion.Hayley is a former clinical psychologist, wellbeing coach, author, and host of the Welcome to Self® podcast. She’s also the past president of Compassionate Mind Australia, and her work sits at the heart of compassion science translated into everyday life.We centre the conversation around Hayley’s upcoming book, From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A Compassionate Guide to Creating a Thriving Life (released 5 February 2026). Together, we unpack what self-neglect actually looks like in day-to-day life, why so many high-achieving and people-pleasing individuals fall into it, and how it quietly erodes wellbeing, relationships, and vitality over time.We explore the three circles model, self-criticism, boundaries, values, sleep, and the micro-moments where compassionate action really counts. Hayley also shares openly about the personal journey of writing the book, and what it was like to live the very principles she was putting on the page.This episode is for anyone who feels stretched, depleted, or stuck in patterns of putting themselves last — and who wants a kinder, more sustainable way forward.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:37 Discussing the New Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion02:00 Understanding Self-Neglect02:34 Micro Moments of Self-Neglect04:15 Impact of Self-Neglect on Relationships and Wellbeing05:33 Burnout Prevention and Compassionate Action06:56 Exploring the Three Circles Model11:03 Self-Criticism and Its Origins13:44 Getting to Know Yourself: Practical Steps20:39 Reconnecting with Values and Hopes26:24 The Challenge of Setting Boundaries28:51 Navigating Relationship Boundaries29:45 Building Self-Trust Through Boundaries30:36 The Importance of Sleep and Self-Care35:08 Compassion and Making Lasting Changes40:27 Writing the Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion48:16 Practical Steps for Self-Compassion52:45 Final Thoughts and ReflectionsLinks:From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A compassionate guide to creating a thriving life.https://drhayleydquinn.com/product/book/ AVAILABLE NOW FOR PRE-ORDER Publishing 6 February 2026Hayley’s website: https://drhayleydquinn.com/Follow Hayley on Instagram: @drhayleydquinnIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/7Ju0I5AIaEo*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:selfcompassion, burnoutprevention, compassionfocusedtherapy, wellbeing, boundaries, mentalhealth, women, genderdiversity

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Professor Ross G. White — clinical psychologist, researcher, and author of The Tree That Bends: How a Flexible Mind Can Help You Thrive. Together, we explore what it really means to live well in high-pressure, high-performance cultures, and why psychological flexibility may be one of the most important skills for thriving rather than burning out.Ross and I begin by unpacking the hidden costs of high achievement — including perfectionism, relentless striving, and shame-based self-criticism — alongside the genuine rewards that keep us pushing forward. From there, we explore how psychological flexibility helps us hold strong intentions without becoming rigidly attached to outcomes, allowing us to pursue meaningful goals while protecting our wellbeing.We then dive into the core framework of The Tree That Bends, using the metaphor of a tree to bring psychological flexibility to life. Ross explains the three key elements — being Anchored, Willing, and Empowered — and how values, mindfulness, and willingness to meet difficult thoughts and emotions can guide us towards more workable, compassionate ways of living.Later in the conversation, we explore the Get–Threat–Reset modes, drawing parallels with compassion science and the realities of modern life. Ross shares practical ways to cultivate reset — through compassion, gratitude, wonder, and courageous life choices — and why reset is essential for long-term flourishing.We finish by turning our attention to men, masculinity, self-compassion, and psychological flexibility. Ross speaks powerfully about the cultural pressures men face around performance and emotional restraint, and how self-compassion can be reframed not as weakness, but as strength turned inward — a vital resource for living fuller, kinder, and more connected lives.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Psychological Flexibility00:37 Meet Professor Ross G. White01:14 High Achievement and Its Hidden Costs03:41 Perfectionism, Shame, and Burnout08:06 What Is Psychological Flexibility?08:59 Strong Intention, Light Attachment19:23 The Tree That Bends Metaphor20:48 Anchored, Willing, Empowered25:31 Discovering Personal Values28:34 Values, Roles, and Context29:21 Emotional Distress and What It Points To30:36 Practical Ways to Identify Values31:30 Willingness and Meeting Discomfort32:07 The Media Outlet Analogy33:21 The Roving Reporter Exercise36:42 Empowerment, Purpose, and Action43:49 Reset Mode and the Tree Metaphor48:10 Men, Masculinity, and Self-Compassion53:02 Where to Find Ross and Final ReflectionsLinks:The Tree That Bends: How a Flexible Mind Can Help You Thrivehttps://www.amazon.com.au/Tree-That-Bends-Flexible-Thrive/dp/1529430003Ross’s website: https://www.rossgwhite.com/Follow Ross on Instagram and LinkedIn: @rossgwhiteIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/x3eShGyfPUE*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:psychologicalflexibility, selfcompassion, mentalhealth, compassionfocusedtherapy, wellbeing, resilience

In the final guest interview of 2025, I’m joined by someone whose work has profoundly shaped the way we think about compassion, connection, and healing in groups: Dr Derek Griner, Clinical Professor and Associate Training Director in Counseling Psychology at Brigham Young University.Derek is one of the leading voices in developing Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) for groups, co-authoring the CFT Participant Workbook and Clinician Guide, contributing major research and book chapters, and recently developing a new process-oriented CFT group approach alongside Professor Paul Gilbert during his sabbatical in the UK.In this conversation, Derek and I explore the heart of compassion-focused group psychotherapy — where connection, courage, curiosity, and vulnerability become powerful agents of change. We talk about why groups offer something unique that individual therapy can’t, how the “three flows” of compassion come alive between people, and what it looks like when a facilitator stays flexible enough to follow the “oasis moments” that emerge in real time.Derek shares rich examples from his clinical work, including a moving story about misnaming a group member and how that moment — full of embarrassment, apology, courage, and compassion — became a profound teaching point for the whole group. We also dive into cultural adaptation, therapist characteristics, compassionate composure, and the future of CFT groups across cultures and contexts.It’s a beautiful, thoughtful, and fitting way to close out the year. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.Timestamps00:00 Introduction and Year in Review00:52 Introducing Dr. Derek Griner03:09 Dr. Griner's Journey into Group Therapy06:25 The Power of Connection in Group Therapy08:08 Compassion Focused Therapy in Groups11:44 The Role of Flexibility in Group Therapy18:52 Challenges and Opportunities in Group Therapy24:30 Real-Life Examples and Insights27:48 Exploring CFT Principles in Real-Life Scenarios28:58 The Power of Apology and Forgiveness in Therapy31:05 Therapist Vulnerability and Authentic Connection34:19 The Role of Therapist Characteristics39:12 Recognizing Compassionate Connection in Groups45:19 Cultural Adaptation in CFT52:42 The Future of Compassion Focused Therapy for Groups56:26 Final Thoughts and GratitudeLinks:For Dr Griner’s contact, books, resources and trainings, go to his page on the BYU website:https://caps.byu.edu/directory/derek-griner If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/1OhQtpgrZZU *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, grouptherapy, compassioninatshirt, mentalhealth, psychotherapy, cftgroups

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by someone whose work I’ve admired from afar for a very long time – Dr Robyn D. Walser.Robyn is a clinical psychologist, Assistant Clinical Professor at the University of California, Berkeley, Director of Research at Bay Area Trauma Recovery Clinical Services, and on staff at the National Center for PTSD at the VA Palo Alto Health Care System. She is internationally recognised for her work in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), trauma, moral injury, and values-based living, and is co-author of influential ACT texts such as Learning ACT and The Heart of ACT.In our conversation we explore her powerful new book, You Are Not Your Trauma, co-authored with Darrah Westrup. We talk about the core message behind the title – that we are much more than the worst things that have happened to us – and how ACT helps people relate differently to painful memories, emotions, and self-stories.Robyn walks us through the three stages of healing outlined in the book:. building safety, grounding, and skills,. turning toward traumatic experiences using exposure-based processes in an ACT-consistent way, and. reconnecting with values, meaning, and joy to build a life worth living.We also explore how self-compassion and the therapist’s compassionate presence can gently soften shame and self-blame, especially in complex trauma.Later in the episode, Robyn reflects on her decades of work with women who have experienced violence, oppression, and systemic disadvantage, including women veterans. We then turn to her new training, Women Rising, which focuses on understanding women’s suffering through a systemic lens, supporting agency and courage, and helping women separate societal expectations from their own deeply held values.It was an honour to sit with Robyn and hear her wisdom, courage, and humanity in the face of profound suffering. I hope this conversation offers you validation, hope, and some practical ways of thinking about healing from trauma and moving toward a more meaningful life.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Dr. Robin Walzer01:04 Discussing 'You Are Not Your Trauma'02:12 Understanding Trauma and Identity04:13 The Role of Language and Experience07:44 Psychological Flexibility and Identity11:28 Stages of Healing in Trauma12:05 Building Safety and Grounding24:42 The Importance of Compassion in Therapy30:01 Understanding Self-Compassion in Trauma30:52 Defining Suffering and Avoidance33:41 Exposure Therapy and Habituation37:04 Addressing Self-Blame and Shame41:39 Stage Three: Flourishing and Finding Meaning45:42 Empowering Women and Addressing Violence51:59 Concluding Thoughts and Future WorkLinks:For Dr Wasler’s contact, books, resources and trainings, go to her website: https://robynwalser.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/2HLhmSPytB8 *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassioninatshirt, traumahealing, acceptanceandcommitmenttherapy, selfcompassion, womensmentalhealth, psychologytalk

Have you ever felt torn between a part of you that wants to change and a part that absolutely doesn’t? Or felt “held hostage” by a critical inner voice telling you what you should be doing? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with my dear friend and motivational interviewing trainer, Patrick Berthiaume, to explore ambivalence, discord, and how compassion can transform both our relationships and our inner lives.Patrick is a French Canadian from Montreal with a background in sexology, who spent years working at the coalface of human suffering – alongside people experiencing homelessness, addictions, and involvement in sex work. Those years taught him about humility, vulnerability, dignity, and what it really means to offer a genuinely helpful, non-judgemental conversation.Together we explore:Why people often expect to be judged and controlled when they ask for helpThe MI idea of discord in the client–clinician relationship, and how pushing for change can trigger resistanceAmbivalence as a normal part of being human – and why the first ambivalence is often, “Do I even dare to talk about this?”How internal discord shows up as different “parts” arguing with each other – including the harsh, self-critical part that wants us to “do better”The role of empathy, autonomy support, humility and vulnerability in creating a safe space for real changeHow compassion helps us slow down, honour the intention behind even unhelpful behaviours, and soften the inner battles we fight with ourselvesPatrick also reflects on his own journey from a wide-eyed country boy arriving in Montreal, to walking side by side with people who are often stigmatised as “the worst of society”, and how those relationships became his greatest teachers of compassion.If you’re interested in motivational interviewing, Compassion Focused Therapy, addictions, or simply understanding your own mixed feelings and self-criticism a little more kindly, I think you’ll find this a rich and very human conversation.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Patrick Berthiaume01:32 Patrick's Early Work and Lessons Learned12:45 Understanding Ambivalence and Empathy20:01 The Role of Vulnerability and Humility33:42 Compassion in Practice46:50 Internal Ambivalence and Self-Compassion01:06:38 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLinks:Patrick Berthiaume's website:https://perspectivehumaine.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/1ylVc5uuI5I*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassioninatshirt, motivationalinterviewing, compassionfocusedtherapy, ambivalence, selfcompassion, addictions

Join me on Compassion in a T-Shirt as I sit down with clinical psychologist, author, and CFT pioneer Dr Mary Welford for a rich and surprising conversation about self-criticism — what it is, why we do it, and the unexpected functions it serves.Mary reflects on her early journey into Compassion Focused Therapy, including the profound influence of Professor Paul Gilbert’s work on shame and self-criticism, and her experiences during the formative years of the Compassionate Mind Foundation. We explore the challenges she faced in clinical practice, the breakthroughs that shaped her approach, and how CFT evolved into what it is today.In this episode, Mary also shares practical, compassionate ways to work with the inner critic, insights from working with diverse populations — from young people to elite athletes — and the small, grounded practices that sustain her in daily life. Whether you're a therapist, a student, or simply someone trying to soften the harshness within, this conversation offers warmth, wisdom, and plenty to take away.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Self-Criticism00:26 Meet Dr Mary Welford01:42 Early Encounters with CFT02:27 Challenges in Clinical Practice06:13 Discovering Compassion-Focused Therapy09:23 The Impact of CFT on Clinical Work21:00 Personal Reflections on Self-Criticism29:29 The Role of Compassion in Therapy35:06 Exploring Self-Criticism and Shame35:32 Personal Reflections on Shame and Social Performance38:28 Changing Relationship with Self-Criticism40:05 Working with Elite Athletes42:58 Coaching and Self-Criticism in Sports45:36 Psychological Flexibility and Self-Compassion53:34 Personal Practices for Compassion01:03:37 Future Projects and Personal BalanceIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: [link] *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, selfcriticism, compassiontraining, marywelford, psychologytalks, compassioninatshirt

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Sydney-based psychotherapist Megan Buys to explore the rich and evolving world of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy. Megan recently published a landmark paper, Exploring the Evidence for Internal Family Systems Therapy: A Scoping Review of Current Research, Gaps, and Future Directions, in Clinical Psychologist—the first comprehensive synthesis of the IFS evidence base.We talk about what drew her to IFS, the model’s theoretical foundations, and the central role of compassion and the “Self” in helping clients understand, relate to, and heal their internal systems. Megan also shares insights from her research on using IFS for premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD), the importance of rigorous research for wider clinical acceptance, and why IFS continues to resonate with so many people seeking deeper, kinder ways of understanding themselves.Whether you’re a therapist, a student, or simply curious about personal growth and emotional wellbeing, this conversation offers a thoughtful and accessible look at one of today’s most influential therapeutic models.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:32 Meet Megan Buys: Exploring Internal Family Systems01:39 Megan's Journey with IFS05:15 The Role of Self and Compassion in IFS07:00 Megan's Professional Path and IFS Integration12:54 Challenges and Acceptance of IFS in Therapy18:52 Understanding Internal Family Systems Theory21:37 Practical Examples of IFS in Action25:06 Creative Processes in IFS Therapy29:12 Exploring Vulnerability and Exhaustion29:34 Art Therapy and Imagery in Therapy30:16 Creating a Safe Space for Parts33:23 The Role of Self in Therapy37:31 Cultivating Compassion and Self-Awareness48:14 The Importance of Research in IFS52:26 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLinks:Exploring the evidence for Internal Family Systems therapy: a scoping review of current research, gaps, and future directions (Buys, 2025)https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/13284207.2025.2533127 No Bad Parts (Schwartz, 2024)https://www.amazon.com.au/No-Bad-Parts-Restoring-Wholeness/dp/1785045113/ If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/79xo3djhcSk *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:ifs therapy, internal family systems, compassion in a t shirt, psychotherapy australia, self compassion, mental health conversations

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Michelle Becker, a licensed marriage and family therapist, international teacher, and co-founder of the Wise Compassion Program. Michelle shares her remarkable journey from certified public accountant to compassion-focused therapist, and how that path led her to create the groundbreaking Compassion for Couples program.We explore how compassion can transform relationships — from understanding the three-circle model of emotion regulation developed by Paul Gilbert, to practical dyadic exercises that help couples connect more deeply and respond to conflict with care. Michelle offers heartfelt insights and powerful examples of how cultivating self-compassion and partner compassion can heal, strengthen, and sustain love.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt01:23 Michelle Becker’s Journey to Compassion03:47 The Importance of Healthy Relationships06:06 Understanding Compassion in Relationships07:51 Self-Compassion and Partner Compassion09:57 Threat System in Relationships20:17 Drive System and Relationship Dynamics28:54 Exploring Dyadic Practices for Couples29:24 Powerful Exercises to Understand Patterns32:22 Loving Kindness Practice33:26 Customising Compassionate Practices38:12 Challenges in Receiving Compassion42:47 Communicating Needs in Relationships46:48 A Real-Life Example of Compassion in Action51:25 Final Thoughts and ReflectionsLinks:Compassion for Couples: Building the Skills of Loving Connection (Becker, 2023)https://www.amazon.com.au/Compassion-Couples-Building-Skills-Connection/dp/1462545157If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/Gq4RkLl5bfI *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, mindfulselfcompassion, relationships, couplescounselling, compassionforcouples, michellebecker

In this episode, I sit down with Dr Audra Horney, a licensed psychologist from Arizona, USA, who specialises in men’s mental health. Audra brings a refreshing mix of humour, honesty, and deep compassion to her work, helping men feel that therapy is a place where they truly belong.We explore how to make therapy relevant, comfortable, and safe for men — and what happens when men start to connect with their emotions rather than avoid them. Audra shares her journey into specialising in men’s mental health, how she builds trust through authenticity, and why laughter can be such a powerful therapeutic tool.Together, we dive into big questions around self-compassion, emotional expression, and self-criticism, and look at how approaches like Internal Family Systems (IFS) and psychoeducation can support men in navigating their inner world with greater understanding and courage.It’s a conversation about expanding what masculinity can mean — one that invites men to show up with both strength and softness.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Dr. Audra Horney01:14 The Importance of Men’s Mental Health03:25 Challenges Men Face in Therapy05:17 Creating a Safe Space for Men09:26 Authenticity in Therapy15:25 Humour and Rapport Building18:59 Compassion and Self-Compassion26:30 Emotional Vocabulary and Expression29:53 Understanding Emotions in Men31:03 The Role of Shame in Emotional Expression35:23 Navigating Self-Criticism46:22 The Importance of Self-Compassion48:02 Expanding Masculinity52:02 Upcoming Projects and PodcastLinks:Dr Audra Horney's website (and links to socials)https://www.moderntherapyaz.com/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/ltdqw22oaTI *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:men’s mental health, compassion in therapy, self-compassion, internal family systems, IFS therapy, emotional expression, masculinity, shame and vulnerability, humour in therapy, compassion for men, men and emotions, psychology podcast, compassion focused therapy, Dr Stan Steindl, Dr Audra Horney, mental health awareness, therapy for men, emotional intelligence, self-criticism, vulnerability and strength

What if healing emotional pain could start with the simple act of tapping? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Carol Look, a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and pioneering EFT Master, for an inspiring conversation about Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), psychotherapy, and gratitude. Carol shares her journey from traditional psychotherapy to discovering the transformative power of EFT. We talk about The Yes Code and her new book Yes, Thank You, and how tapping combined with gratitude can help release emotional blocks, address self-sabotage, and bring about profound healing. Together we explore how EFT and gratitude can unlock self-compassion, foster resilience, and open the door to lasting change. With practical demonstrations and personal insights, this is a must-watch for anyone interested in holistic healing, tapping, and emotional freedom.Links:Carol Look's websitehttps://www.carollook.com/Carol's new book Yes, Thank Youhttps://www.carollook.com/yesthankyou/Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Carol Look and EFT00:53 Discovering EFT: A Personal Journey02:49 The Power of Tapping: Mechanisms and Benefits09:42 Introducing the YES Code16:29 Self-Compassion and Overcoming Blocks26:23 Integrating Gratitude with Problem-Focused Approaches27:39 The Power of Tapping and Gratitude Combined27:58 Scientific Research Supporting Tapping and Gratitude29:07 Transformative Effects of Gratitude and Tapping32:24 Addressing PTSD and Deep-Seated Wounds42:18 Practical Tapping and Gratitude Exercise48:46 Choosing Joy and Emotional Freedom50:30 Upcoming Workshops and Future PlansIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/g8-3KwYvJGA *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:eft tapping, carol look, yes thank you book, the yes code, self compassion, gratitude practice, emotional freedom techniques, holistic healing, tapping therapy, compassion in a t shirt

What if compassion, not punishment, was at the heart of how we respond to drug use?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr. Stan Steindl welcomes Dee-Dee Stout, a renowned counselor, educator, and leading advocate for harm reduction. Dee-Dee discusses her groundbreaking book Coming to Harm Reduction Kicking and Screaming, which shares powerful stories of people who use drugs and the families who support them.This conversation explores harm reduction, motivational interviewing, and the role of compassion, empathy, and respect in treatment. We look at the future of harm reduction, challenge myths and misconceptions, and highlight how radical love and acceptance can transform addiction recovery and social justice.Links:Dee-Dee Stout's websitehttps://www.deedeestoutconsulting.com/Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:54 Exploring the Book: Coming to Harm Reduction Kicking and Screaming03:05 Dee-Dee Stout's Journey into Harm Reduction06:14 The Power of Radical Love and Acceptance08:47 Understanding Harm Reduction and Its Impact16:36 The Role of Compassion in Therapy21:52 Defining Harm Reduction and Its Applications28:25 Creative Process of Harm Reduction29:35 Challenges and Stakeholders in Harm Reduction30:20 Effectiveness of Self-Selected Goals31:14 Evolution of Harm Reduction Policies34:06 Misconceptions and Myths about Harm Reduction36:14 Harm Reduction Psychotherapy as Treatment46:29 Personal Stories and Cultural Change55:27 Future of Harm ReductionIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: [link] *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:harm reduction, addiction recovery, motivational interviewing, compassion focused therapy, social justice, addiction treatment, drug policy

Is your empathy helping you—or wearing you down?If you’re in a helping profession, this conversation will speak to your heart and your nervous system.In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr. Stan Steindl speaks with Tanya Cooper, a Melbourne-based clinical psychologist, Motivational Interviewing trainer, and longtime member of MINT. With over 25 years of experience, Tanya offers profound insights into the emotional cost of care work and how to sustain compassion without burning out.Drawing from her personal journey during Melbourne’s intense lockdowns and the work of thinkers like Jamil Zaki, Babette Rothschild, and Kristin Neff, Tanya explores the concept of an "empathy ecosystem"—and how understanding the balance between experience sharing, cognitive empathy, and compassion can help us stay grounded, regulated, and truly helpful.Whether you’re a therapist, social worker, nurse, teacher, or carer, this conversation is packed with wisdom, warmth, and practical strategies to protect your empathy and nurture your wellbeing.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:06 Meet Tanya Cooper: A Deep Dive into Empathy01:44 The Emotional Toll of Being a Psychologist02:52 Impact of the Pandemic on Mental Health04:11 Navigating Empathy During Lockdown07:30 The Concept of an Empathy Ecosystem18:45 Personal Stories and Professional Insights26:27 Exploring the Three Modes of Empathy26:50 Empathy in Competitive and Compassionate Contexts28:31 Individual Differences in Empathy29:55 Empathy and the Pandemic38:44 Self-Care and Regulation During Crisis41:36 The Power of Small Gestures48:20 Taking in the Good52:02 Final Reflections on Empathy and Self-CareIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/s7YkWnUX9qo *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:empathy burnout, compassion fatigue, motivational interviewing, mental health professionals, nervous system regulation, Tanya Cooper, Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl, self-compassion, cognitive empathy, Jamil Zaki, Babette Rothschild, Kristin Neff, polyvagal theory, vicarious trauma, emotional resilience, pandemic mental health

What if parenting wasn’t just about raising children—but also about becoming more human yourself?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Shevonne Hunt—presenter, producer, writer, and longtime champion of human stories. Shevonne shares her journey from radio and Kinderling Conversation to creating the podcast A Better World Blueprint, a show that offers hope, insight, and inspiration in a time when the world can feel overwhelming.We talk about the emotional challenges of parenting, the role of compassion in family and community life, and what she’s learned from years of interviewing parents, experts, and changemakers. Shevonne offers wisdom on self-care, resilience, vulnerability, and how being helpful at the coalface of life can lead to deep meaning and joy.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:52 Shevonne Hunt's Journey into Parenting Media01:36 The Serendipitous Path to Kinderling Kids Radio06:29 The Role of Compassion and Vulnerability10:18 Lessons from Parenting Experts16:47 The Pressure and Self-Criticism in Parenting22:26 Introducing A Better World Blueprint24:29 Finding Purpose and Inspiration31:58 Self-Care and Connection in Challenging Work36:36 The Joy of Helping Others39:21 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/25mab1NsDms *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:compassion, parenting podcast, shevonne hunt, kinderling conversation, feed play love, a better world blueprint, self-compassion, emotional wellbeing, storytelling, parenting wisdom, personal growth

What does it take to have a truly compassionate conversation—one that heals, connects, and even bridges deep divides?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I have the great pleasure of speaking with Stephen Andrew—a seasoned therapist, trainer, storyteller, and the warm, wise voice behind the podcast Conversations in Compassion. Based in Portland, Maine, Stephen has spent decades working with people experiencing addiction, mental illness, and trauma, and he brings a deeply compassionate lens to everything he does.Together, we explore what makes a conversation truly compassionate—from the inner skills we cultivate, to the shared space we create between us. Stephen shares his concept of the Tai Chi of Empathy, and we talk about the roles of mindfulness, radical humility, and presence in healing relationships. We also look at how compassion can guide us through difficult conversations, even across divides, and why things like trust, silence, and heartfelt apologies matter more than ever.This conversation is full of insight, humour, and heart—and I hope it brings something meaningful to you too.Links:Stephen Andrew websitehttps://www.hetimaine.org/Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt01:03 Welcoming Stephen Andrew01:26 Defining Compassionate Conversations04:24 The Tai Chi of Empathy06:33 Practicing Radical Humility13:36 The Courage to Embrace Mystery17:52 Empathy as a Healing Practice21:19 Understanding Trauma Injuries30:48 The Power of Compassion and Trust32:00 Understanding Shame, Isolation, and Fear33:53 Creating a Safe and Secure Environment35:16 The Role of Compassion in Healing40:32 Navigating Disagreements with Empathy48:03 The Importance of Silence and Reflection55:48 Practical Steps for Compassionate ConversationsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/STYgf6YdkUM *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionate communication, motivational interviewing, empathy in practice, trauma-informed care, radical humility, healing relationships

What if the greatest act of courage in a group is creating the psychological safety for all to have a voice?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Majella Greene—social worker, therapist, trainer, and thought leader in psychological safety. We explore what it really means to create spaces where people can show up authentically, speak openly, and feel safe enough to take risks, make mistakes, and connect with others.From the impact of power dynamics to the importance of cultural humility, Majella shares powerful insights into what makes safety not just structural, but felt. We talk about compassion, vulnerability, leadership, and even beekeeping—as a surprising but meaningful metaphor for safe and thriving communities.It was a rich and inspiring conversation about the courage to show up, and how we can co-create environments where everyone has a voice.Learn more about Majella’s work: https://majellagreene.co.uk/ Watch the webinar with Majella, Bill Miller, Denise Ernst & myself: https://mint.thinkific.com/products/live_events/CompassionSafetyHopeTimestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:06 Meet Majella Greene: A Thought Leader in Psychological Safety01:34 The Concept of Psychological Safety04:46 Internal and Collective Responsibility09:04 Cues for a Psychologically Safe Environment13:43 Belonging Without Fitting In16:59 Compassion and Authenticity24:34 The Importance of Repair30:12 Difficult Conversations in Leadership34:19 The Importance of Difficult Conversations34:58 Addressing Small Issues in Psychological Safety37:23 Beekeeping as a Metaphor for Psychological Safety43:55 The Power of Asking "What Do You Want?”47:38 Creating Psychological Safety: Aspirations and Realities57:28 Practical Steps for Self-Compassion and Safety58:52 Final Thoughts and ReflectionsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/6Lz2O0mJGB4*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:psychological safety, compassion in leadership, trauma informed, cultural humility, inclusive teams, workplace wellbeing

What does it really mean to teach mindfulness with integrity, compassion, and care?In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Professor Rebecca Crane — a true pioneer in the field of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) and director of the Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice at Bangor University. Together, we explore the heart of MBCT: where it came from, what makes it distinctive, and how it continues to evolve in response to the complex challenges of our times.From the subtle art of teacher embodiment, to supporting inclusivity and social justice in mindfulness spaces, Rebecca offers profound insights into how mindfulness can transform both individuals and systems — including our approach to mental health, equity, and even the climate crisis.Whether you’re a seasoned mindfulness teacher or simply curious about how these practices can foster personal and collective well-being, this conversation is full of wisdom, warmth, and hope.Books by Rebecca Crane:Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy: Distinctive Features (2nd ed): https://www.routledge.com/Mindfulness-Based-Cognitive-Therapy-Distinctive-Features/Crane/p/book/9781138671035Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy with People at Risk of Suicide: https://global.oup.com/academic/product/mindfulness-based-cognitive-therapy-with-people-at-risk-of-suicide-9780199558672Essential Resources for Mindfulness Teachers: https://www.routledge.com/Essential-Resources-for-Mindfulness-Teachers/Crane-Karunavira-Griffith/p/book/9780367363214Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice at Bangor University: https://www.bangor.ac.uk/mindfulnessTimestamps:00:00 Introduction to Mindfulness and Guest Speaker01:41 Exploring Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT)10:04 The Role of Compassion in Mindfulness15:05 Embodiment and Teaching Mindfulness25:03 Challenges and Adaptations in Mindfulness Training38:51 Inclusivity and Systemic Issues in Mindfulness43:54 Mindfulness in Addressing Global Challenges53:13 Conclusion and Future DirectionsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/UEpnRXdVaNs*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:mindfulness, mbct, rebecca crane, mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, compassion, mental health, embodiment, inclusivity, climate justice, teacher training, meditation, mindfulness teaching, social justice, compassion in a t-shirt

Can we hold people accountable and meet them with compassion?In this powerful and thought-provoking episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with my friend and colleague Ken McMaster, a social worker, trainer, author, and founder of HMA in Aotearoa New Zealand. Ken has spent over four decades working at the frontline of domestic and family violence intervention, and brings a wealth of insight into how people change — and what it takes to truly support that change.We explore the complex relationship between compassion and accountability, the role of shame and trauma in harmful behaviours, and the importance of emotional regulation and self-compassion in the journey towards safer, healthier relationships. Ken shares both personal and professional reflections on what sustains him in this difficult work — and how we can keep showing up with care, even when the work is hard.Whether you’re a practitioner, a policymaker, or someone curious about the capacity for change, I hope this conversation offers something meaningful.TIMESTAMPS00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:17 Meet Ken McMaster: A Journey in Social Work01:24 Early Career and Foundational Experiences03:55 Addressing Violence: Professional and Personal Insights07:11 The Role of Compassion in Addressing Harmful Behaviours14:42 Understanding and Managing Shame17:28 Trauma, Adaptation, and Behaviour Change22:16 Self-Compassion and Creating New Narratives26:54 Addressing Youth Abusive Practices28:19 The Role of Anger in Violence30:58 The Importance of Emotional Regulation34:40 Impact of Engaged Fathers38:27 Challenges and Progress in Intervention Programs46:10 Support for Professionals in the Field49:35 Concluding Thoughts on Compassion and EngagementLINKS:You can find out more about Ken’s work at hma.co.nzSay hi on social:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/OxK4cSw8RXU*Affiliate Disclaimer:Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:compassion, domestic violence, behaviour change, shame, self compassion, trauma, anger, emotional regulation, accountability, ken mcmaster

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with psychiatrist Dr Warren Ward and clinical nutritionist and recovery coach Lexi Crouch—co-authors of the new book Renourish, a compassionate, three-phase guide to eating disorder recovery.Together, they explore the brain, body, and soul of recovery:. Dr Ward unpacks the neuroscience of brain starvation, the cultural roots of the eating disorder epidemic, and the importance of full renourishment.. Lexi shares her powerful lived experience of 15 years with anorexia, offering insight, hope, and a deeply personal perspective on recovery.This conversation blends science and story, offering wisdom, practical guidance, and a message that recovery is not only possible, but profoundly meaningful.TIMESTAMPS00:00 Introduction to Compassion in a T-Shirt00:17 Meet the Experts: Dr Warren Ward and Lexi Crouch01:48 The Epidemic of Eating Disorders03:14 Cultural Influences and Media Impact04:42 The Role of Brain Starvation10:10 Personal Stories and Recovery Insights19:28 The Minnesota Semi-Starvation Study26:52 Redefining Health and Wellness30:17 Understanding Health Beyond Weight31:49 The Myth of Weight and Health32:37 Health at Every Size Approach34:15 The Renourish Model for Recovery34:51 The Importance of Brain Renourishment35:15 Refriending the Body37:08 Renourishing the Soul38:50 Personal Journey and Self-Compassion42:47 The Role of Yoga in Recovery51:13 The Power of Lived Experience55:53 Final Thoughts and EncouragementPlease like and subscribe, and comment below!LINKS:Renourish: A complete and compassionate guide to recovery from eating disorders (Ward & Crouch, 2025)https://www.panmacmillan.com.au/9781761773310/Lexi Crouch on Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/lexi.crouch/Say hi on social:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindlTwitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindlInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/r5MAhaQOahg*Affiliate Disclaimer:Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support!Video hashtags:EatingDisorderRecovery, RenourishBook, CompassionInATShirt, SelfCompassion, MentalHealthAwareness, LivedExperience

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr. Stan Steindl sits down with Dr. Chia-Ying Chou, a UCSF-trained psychologist and leading specialist in hoarding and cluttering. Chia-Ying combines Compassion Focused Therapy with years of clinical and research expertise to help people move beyond shame, self-criticism, and avoidance.Together, we explore:. What hoarding really is — beyond just “too much stuff.”. The emotional roots of hoarding, including shame and fear.. How Compassionate Mind Training (CMT) can build the courage and inner strength needed to face these challenges.. Practical skills and strategies for creating a kinder, more supportive relationship with ourselves.Chia-Ying also shares details of her upcoming CMT workshops, offering hope and practical guidance for anyone struggling with clutter, or supporting a loved one who is.✨ If you’ve ever wondered how compassion can transform the way we relate to ourselves and our possessions, this conversation is for you.Timestamps:00:00 Welcome to Compassion in a T-Shirt01:00 Understanding Hoarding: Beyond the Clutter02:25 The Emotional Roots of Hoarding10:41 Compassionate Mind Training for Hoarding18:01 The Role of Drive and Soothing Systems28:39 Challenges and Misconceptions in Self-Compassion41:25 Workshop Details and Final ThoughtsLinks:Dr. Chia-Ying Chou at The San Francisco Center for Compassion-Focused Therapieshttps://www.sfcompassion.com/Compassionate Mind Training for Hoardinghttps://sfcompassion.regfox.com/compassionate-mind-training-for-hoarding If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/Fdv_o79XnGc *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, hoardinghelp, selfcompassion, compassionatehealing, mentalhealthawareness, clutterfree

What if the most powerful question a leader could ask was: “How can I best be helpful?”In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Gabriela Jones and Alexandra Thomas, co-authors of the compelling new book Compassion-Focused Leadership. Nominated for HR Book of the Year in Sweden, their work explores how compassion—defined as empathy in action—can transform leadership, organisations, and the humans within them.Together, we dive into the core principles of compassion-focused leadership, from the evolutionary science of our emotional brains, to the three flows of compassion, to the importance of building psychological safety and inclusion in the workplace. Gabriela and Alexandra bring both warmth and wisdom, blending personal stories with practical strategies that leaders at all levels can use.We talk about power dynamics, burnout, self-compassion, fierce compassion, and the everyday moments where leaders can choose to pause, reflect, and act with courage and kindness. Their message is clear: compassion isn’t soft—it’s strong, strategic, and sorely needed in the modern workplace.Whether you're leading others, being led, or leading yourself, this conversation is for you.Watch now—and ask yourself: How can I best be helpful?TIMESTAMPS:00:00 Introduction to Compassionate Leadership00:16 Meet the Authors: Gabriela Jones and Alexandra Thomas01:31 The Heartbeat of Compassionate Leadership01:59 Gabriela's Journey: Compassion in Adversity07:58 The Three Flows of Compassion13:02 Compassion Pays Off: Organisational Benefits19:42 Evolutionary Perspective on Leadership24:29 Balancing the Three Emotion Regulation Systems34:11 The Impact of Self-Judgment in Leadership34:53 Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Practices36:29 Balancing Feedback and Compassion39:41 Developing Self-Compassion in Leadership43:39 Creating Inclusive and Compassionate Workplaces48:02 Compassionate Organisational Architecture54:55 Daily Practices for Compassionate Leadership01:00:54 Final Thoughts on Compassionate LeadershipLINKS:Alexandra Thomas:https://www.creativecompassion.se/english/Gabriela Jones:https://www.psykologbyranjones.se/om-oss/If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/uSddbflszvU*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionate leadership, workplace wellbeing, psychological safety, self compassion, organisational culture, leadership development

What does it mean to live a good life—and how do we find our way there, even through pain?In this deeply thoughtful and delightfully down-to-earth conversation, I’m joined by clinical psychologist, ACT trainer, and author Dr. Jenna LeJeune, co-author of Values in Therapy. Together, we explore how reconnecting with our values—those freely chosen ways of being—can guide us toward a life that truly matters.We talk about:. What values really are (hint: they’re not just nouns like “family” or “work”). Why pain can be a compass, not just a burden. How psychological flexibility helps us move towards what matters, even when life gets hard. Creative ways to uncover your values (including a very curious metaphor: becoming a truffle dog). The barriers that pull us off course—and how to come back, gently. Where compassion fits in this values-based way of livingWhether you're a therapist, a fellow human navigating life’s complexity, or someone curious about how to live more meaningfully, this conversation offers warmth, wisdom, and practical insight.What would a well-lived life look like for you? And… could you sniff it out like a truffle dog? Watch now and let us know your values-based takeaway in the comments.TIMESTAMPS:00:00 Introduction to Dr. Jenna Lejeune01:17 Understanding Values in Therapy04:08 The Role of Values in Living a Good Life08:13 Navigating Life with Psychological Flexibility12:21 Discovering and Living Your Values26:08 The Intersection of Values and Pain26:29 Exploring Pain and Values in Therapy29:49 The Role of Pain in Values-Based Living31:17 Navigating Barriers to Values-Based Living36:00 Living Authentically in Different Contexts42:00 The Importance of Supportive Relationships44:38 Therapist's Approach to Values-Based Practice48:16 Compassion and Values in Therapy51:41 Concluding Thoughts on Values and CompassionLINKS:Values in Therapy: A Clinician's Guide to Helping Clients Explore Values, Increase Psychological Flexibility, and Live a More Meaningful Life (LeJuene & Luoma, 2019)https://www.newharbinger.com/9781684033225/values-in-therapy/?srsltid=AfmBOorvPoGNWh1y_vwPgGvPNFJVm26UvGLftDZ50blFZegn7UAy5KQVMore about Dr Jenna LeJeune here:https://portlandpsychotherapy.com/jenna-lejeune-ph-d/ If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/WjsLzttrgoA*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:values in therapy, psychological flexibility, acceptance and commitment therapy, compassion in practice, meaningful living, jenna lejeune

In this heartfelt and insightful episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined once again by Clinical Psychologist, writer, and podcast host Shannon A Swales. Shannon is the founder of Burnout Psychology Support, host of the Midlife Reclaimed podcast, and author of Nothing Left to Give: A Psychologist’s Path Back from Burnout.Shannon first appeared on the channel on 15 July 2023, where she shared her own journey through burnout and recovery. This time, she returns to share her clinical insights and compassionate perspective on helping midlife women navigate burnout, life transitions, and the quiet disconnection so many feel.Together, we explore:. The complex interplay between burnout, perimenopause, identity shifts, and cumulative life stress. The deeper psychological and systemic roots of burnout. How compassion—especially self-compassion—can be a powerful force for healing and recovery. Ways to reconnect with the self through gentle, internal work. The importance of balancing ambition, wellbeing, and authenticity in midlifeTimestamps00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome01:31 Understanding Midlife Burnout01:54 The Impact of Perimenopause and Menopause02:51 Existential Questions and Life Transitions03:47 Cumulative Effects and Behavioral Patterns07:19 Systemic Factors and Workplace Burnout12:48 Reconnecting with Self through Therapy21:03 Internal Work and External Changes23:31 Balancing Career Aspirations and Health29:06 Balancing Priorities and Self-Safety30:24 The Three Circles of Compassion30:55 Introducing Self-Compassion33:33 Challenges in Practicing Self-Compassion37:44 Fierce vs. Tender Self-Compassion43:47 Befriending Burnout50:30 Reconnecting with Self52:57 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLearn more about Shannon’s work:Website: https://www.burnoutpsychologysupport.comPodcast: https://www.burnoutpsychologysupport.com/podcastBook: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CJXBMJD9Blog: https://www.burnoutpsychologysupport.com/blogCommunity: https://midlife-reclaimed.mn.coSocials: @ShannonASwalesIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/C0bc8JSFyFA*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:midlife, burnout, selfcompassion, womenshealth, psychologicalwellbeing, compassionfocusedtherapy

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I had the great pleasure of speaking with Dr Ashley Seidel Potvin—educator, researcher, and lead author of the truly important book Creating Compassionate Change in School Communities: Leading Together to Address Everyday Suffering in Schools.Ashley brings such depth and heart to this conversation, drawing on her work at the Renée Crown Wellness Institute and years of collaboration with educators and researchers. We explored what it really takes to shift school culture—from the deeply personal to the systems-level—and how compassion and dignity can be nurtured in even the most complex school environments.Together, we touched on:. How pausing and attuning to our inner experience lays the foundation for compassion. The everyday forms of suffering educators and students face. The difference between empathy and compassion (and how to avoid empathic distress). Why self-compassion is a powerful preparation for justice-oriented action. How to lead for compassionate change and see the system more clearly. The power of building “compassionate personas” and collective actionIf you’re a teacher, school leader, parent, or just someone who cares about the next generation, I think you’ll find this conversation meaningful and, I hope, hopeful.The book—written by Ashley Seidel Potvin, William Penuel, Sona Dimidjian, and Thupten Jinpa—is out now and well worth a read.Timestamps00:00 – Introduction to Dr. Ashley Seidel Potvin01:45 – The Importance of Compassion in Education07:00 – Practical Strategies for Educators10:00 – Challenges and Suffering in Schools19:58 – Empathy vs. Compassion26:24 – The Role of Self-Compassion30:51 – The Importance of Self-Compassion31:34 – Challenges and Misconceptions About Self-Compassion36:00 – Receiving Compassion from Others38:28 – Systems Level Awareness in Education43:50 – Leadership and Compassionate Change49:31 – Developing Compassionate Personas56:58 – The Journey of Writing the BookLINK:Creating Compassionate Change in School Communities: Leading Together to Address Everyday Suffering in Schools by Ashley Seidel Potvin, William R. Penuel, Sona Dimidjian, and Thupten Jinpa. https://www.colorado.edu/crowninstitute/compassionate-change-schools-bookIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/cuyXZiPKpgY*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionateeducation, selfcompassion, educationalleadership, schoolculture, teacherwellbeing, dignityinschools

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Dr Inês Trindade from Örebro University in Sweden—an accomplished researcher in compassion, self-compassion, acceptance and commitment therapy, and health psychology.Together, we explore the psychological toll of living with inflammatory bowel disease (IBD), and how self-compassion can act as a protective force against depression, anxiety, and stress. We also discuss the powerful role of shame and stigma in gut-related conditions, and how compassion-based interventions can help people find a new way of relating to themselves and their illness.Inês shares insights from her research—including longitudinal studies, online ACT and compassion programmes, and implications for clinicians working with those suffering from IBD—and offers a compelling case for why empathy and compassion must be central in both clinical care and everyday coping.Timestamps:00:00 Introduction to Compassion and Self-Compassion01:32 Understanding Inflammatory Bowel Diseases (IBD)03:37 The Psychological Impact of IBD and IBS06:38 Stigma and Isolation in GI Conditions10:01 The Role of Self-Compassion in Managing IBD12:35 Research Findings on Self-Compassion and Mental Health18:00 Mindfulness and Psychological Flexibility22:34 Intervention Studies: Face-to-Face and Online32:11 Online Intervention Insights32:59 The Role of Social Support in Therapy35:48 Challenges and Adaptations in Therapy40:15 Understanding Shame in Bowel Disorders48:37 Addressing Shame in Clinical Practice54:00 Compassion in Healthcare58:57 Concluding Thoughts and ReflectionsLinks:Dr Inês Trindade at Örebro University including links to her research articles:https://www.oru.se/english/employee/ines_trindadeIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/tIjUXgjf7hg *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassion, selfcompassion, ibd, chronicillness, healthpsychology, acttherapy

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Nicola O’Neill — a transformational mindset coach, spiritual teacher, and founder of a unique training program that helps people harness the power of thought to create meaningful, lasting change.Nicola shares her own personal journey of overcoming significant life challenges — from financial hardship to emotional distress — and how she used practices like mindfulness, gratitude, affirmations, and self-awareness to shift from negativity to possibility.We explore what it really means to raise our energy, move beyond limiting beliefs, and live with more clarity, confidence, and connection.This is an honest, practical conversation about how simple daily practices can lead to profound transformation — and how our own lived experiences can become a source of support and hope for others too.Links:nicolaoneill.comTimestamps:00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction02:41 Nicola's Personal Journey05:57 Discovering the Power of the Subconscious Mind09:23 The Role of Peer Support12:08 The Psychology of Positive Thinking17:41 Affirmations and Their Impact26:34 Mindfulness and Daily Practices29:07 Understanding Acceptance and Energy Levels29:59 The Importance of Self-Awareness30:29 Dr David Hawkins' Consciousness Scale30:59 The Role of Courage and Negative Energy36:30 Mindfulness and Meditation Practices41:37 The Power of Gratitude46:05 Compassion and Spiritual Coaching51:52 Final Thoughts and Social Media LinksIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/P5_YUvw-lVY *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:mindfulness, positive thinking, peer support, self awareness, gratitude practice, compassion

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Professor Michael Inzlicht from the University of Toronto and the Rotman School of Management to explore a question that feels both inspiring and unsettling: Can a machine be more compassionate than a human?Michael’s recent study, Third-Party Evaluators Perceive AI as More Compassionate than Expert Humans, found that people consistently rated AI-generated empathic responses as more caring, understanding, and validating than those written by real people — even trained crisis line professionals. That’s remarkable, and it raises big questions about how we relate to each other and the world around us.We dive into what inspired this research, why expressing empathy can be so costly and draining for humans, and how AI might help fill the growing gap between the need for compassion and our capacity to give it. We also talk about what really happens when people believe they’re being cared for — and whether it matters that AI doesn’t feel empathy in the way we do.Together, we look ahead to what this could mean for therapy, friendship, and society more broadly. Could AI play a role in supporting people when human resources are stretched thin? What are the ethical risks if we rely too heavily on artificial empathy? And how do we stay connected to what makes compassion truly human?I hope this conversation invites you to reflect on what empathy really means — and what it could become in an age of artificial intelligence.LINK:Third-party evaluators perceive AI as more compassionate than expert humans (Ovsyannikova, Oldemburgo de Mello & Inzlicht, 2025)https://www.nature.com/articles/s44271-024-00182-6Timestamps:00:00 Introduction: Compassion and AI00:08 The Groundbreaking Study at a Glance01:19 Meet Professor Michael Inzlicht02:31 ChatGPT’s First Question03:06 What Sparked This Research?05:13 The Future of Empathic AI06:17 Human Emotional Intelligence vs. AI07:31 Can AI Read Emotions?11:47 Where AI Empathy Stands Today12:50 How AI and Humans Compare23:46 Designing the Study: AI vs. Human Experts28:34 The Human Struggle with Empathy29:34 Positive vs. Negative Empathic Responses29:59 Measuring Empathy’s Impact32:24 Can AI Train Us to Be More Empathic?33:57 AI as a Motivational Interviewer35:46 When Human Empathy Falls Short38:53 The Promise and Perils of Empathic AI44:57 Ethics and What Comes Next53:10 Closing ReflectionsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/23pD0B1X-Js*Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Hashtags:AIempathy, compassion, mentalhealth, psychology, artificialintelligence, humanconnection

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Dr Kate Lucre — a remarkable psychotherapist, group specialist, climber, and author of Compassion Focused Group Psychotherapy.Kate shares how she works with people often labelled “too difficult” or “untreatable”, offering hope and healing to those at the edges of therapeutic opportunity. We talk about how her lifelong love of drama, acting, and rock climbing shaped her uniquely playful and courageous approach to Compassion Focused Group Psychotherapy (CFGP).Kate walks me through her five-phase group model — from initial assessment all the way to moving on (with a side of brownies!). We also explore the vital role of personal therapy for facilitators, the power of play in healing shame and trauma, and how climbing becomes a living metaphor for the journey of compassion.I loved hearing about the creative, embodied, and deeply compassionate ways Kate and her co-travellers mobilise compassion, community, and transformation for people so often left out of therapy spaces.Check out Kate’s book: Compassion Focused Group Psychotherapy: An Exploratory Programme for People with Attachment and Relational Trauma — https://amzn.to/3Gn43VdTIMESTAMPS:00:00 Introduction to Dr Kate Lucre01:55 Revisiting the Show and Previous Success03:05 The Journey and Philosophy Behind the Book07:22 The Importance of Personal Therapy for Facilitators13:23 Climbing as a Metaphor for Psychotherapy20:47 Integrating Drama and Play into Therapy42:42 The Escape Pod Concept44:20 Managing Group Dynamics46:25 Challenges and Personal Reflections51:15 Writing the Book53:25 The Five Phase Model01:03:57 Exploratory Group Work01:05:49 Celebrating Endings01:11:03 Future Plans and ProjectsIf you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts-of-compassion-how-to-understand-and-overcome-suffering/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/NYNVTkoDCW4 *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags:compassionfocusedtherapy, grouppsychotherapy, traumahealing, compassionpractice, kateLucre, compassioninatshirt